时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:01] | Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience. | 《燃情克利夫兰》是在摄影棚观众前现场录制的 |
[00:04] | Okay, sit. | 好了 坐下 |
[00:06] | You’ll only get the treat if you sit. | 坐下了才有好吃的哦 |
[00:09] | So sit. | 还不快坐 |
[00:12] | Now I have to sit. | 我累得不得不坐下了 |
[00:16] | Oh, who’s this guy? | 这是谁啊 |
[00:17] | Where did he come from? | 它是从哪儿来的啊 |
[00:20] | He’s the oldest dog at the shelter where I volunteer. | 它是我做义工的动物收容所里最高龄的狗狗 |
[00:23] | Oh, I love rescue dogs. | 我可喜欢被半路救下的狗狗了 |
[00:25] | They’re so grateful and happy. | 它们会知恩图报 开心不已 |
[00:28] | I wish there were rescue men. | 要是有被半路救下的男人就好了 |
[00:32] | He’ll never get adopted unless he learns a cute trick or two. | 它学不会几招小把戏的话 别想被人领养 |
[00:40] | Well, I see he’s mastered the art of licking himself. | 它在”自我口交”方面是颇有造诣的大师级人物 |
[00:44] | Thank god men can’t do that. | 谢天谢地男人够不着那里 |
[00:45] | It’s hard enough to get ’em away from the TV. | 否则除了电视 他们又有沉迷的新花样了 |
[00:48] | You see why the staff calls him Dummy. | 知道它名字为什么叫傻蛋了吧 |
[00:51] | Oh, he’ll be fine. I have the gift with animals. | 它不会有事的 我对待动物很有一手 |
[00:55] | I call it “The gift.” | 我称之为 “有一手” |
[00:59] | I know how they feel, | 我了解它们的感受 |
[01:00] | I know what they think. | 我知道它们的想法 |
[01:02] | What’s he thinking now? | 那它现在在想什么呢 |
[01:04] | What we’re all thinking… | 我和它都在想 |
[01:05] | Why doesn’t Joy dress her age? | 乔依为什么总要在衣着上扮嫩呢 |
[01:11] | Good morning, all. | 姐妹们 早上好 |
[01:12] | I have an announcement to make. | 我有事要宣布 |
[01:13] | I’m going to make a sex tape, and you’re all going to help. | 我要性爱录像 你们都得帮忙 |
[01:17] | We begin after coffee. | 喝完咖啡就开始 |
[01:19] | Oh, and who is this handsome fellow? | 这位帅哥是谁呀 |
[01:22] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么呢 |
[01:23] | Well, surely I’m not the only one in the room who sees a dog. | 它对你们来说 应该不是隐形的吧 |
[01:27] | He’s visiting from the shelter. | 这是动物收容所的狗狗 |
[01:28] | Now back to us supposedly helping you with a sex tape. | 再说说我们得帮助你拍性爱录像的事儿 |
[01:31] | Yes. Well, as you all know, | 好的 大家都知道 |
[01:32] | I am on the verge of financial ruin, | 我离穷光蛋只有一步之遥了 |
[01:34] | and my agent said that a leaked sex tape | 我的经纪人说 不小心泄漏的性爱视频 |
[01:36] | could generate enough media buzz to really jumpstart my career. | 可以吸引到足够的媒体注意力 开启我事业的第二春 |
[01:40] | Okay. So who’s the lucky guy? | 好吧 性爱录像男主角是谁 |
[01:42] | Actually, my agent said that the new trend in leaked sex tapes | 事实上 我的经纪人说 时下最潮的不雅视频 |
[01:45] | is girl on girl, and I said, well, I know just the girl. | 是”姐妹摩擦”型的 而我正好有姐妹可以用 |
[01:48] | Don’t look at me! | 别打我主意 |
[01:51] | Or me. | 我也不可能 |
[01:52] | I’m fighting the I.N.S. Just to stay in this country. | 为了留在美利坚 我正跟移民局拼命呢 |
[01:55] | A sex tape is the last thing I need popping up on my Google search. | 如果在谷歌中搜索到我的性爱视频 绝对是帮倒忙 |
[01:59] | Well, I was thinking of Melanie. | 其实我是想让梅兰妮帮忙 |
[02:01] | Me? | 我 |
[02:03] | I’ve never even done it near a mirror. | 我都没在靠近镜子的地方做过 |
[02:06] | Wait. Did you not ask me because I’m not stacked enough? | 等下 你不考虑我是因为我胸器不够大吗 |
[02:10] | Oh, Joy, don’t hate me. | 乔依 别怨我啊 |
[02:11] | Hate the Internet perverts who run Hollywood. | 要怪就怪掌控好莱坞的变态上网族 |
[02:14] | And I knew you would say no. | 而且我知道你会拒绝的 |
[02:16] | How come you didn’t know I’d say no? | 难道你认为我不会拒绝吗 |
[02:18] | Well, I did, | 我知道你会拒绝 |
[02:19] | but it’s just so much easier to wear you down. | 但要软磨硬泡地说服你要容易多了 |
[02:22] | Not this time. | 这次别指望 |
[02:23] | Oh, come on. | 拜托 |
[02:24] | It’s not like we’re really gonna do anything. | 又不用真枪实弹地来 |
[02:26] | I mean, there won’t be any touching or nudity. | 不会有什么身体接触及裸露 |
[02:30] | That’s some sex tape. | 这算什么狗屁性爱录像 |
[02:33] | All right, I admit I’m a little outside of my area of expertise. | 好吧 我承认这不是我的专长 |
[02:36] | I mean, I’ve never made a sex tape. | 我从来没拍过性爱录像 |
[02:38] | I don’t even understand them. | 我根本不理解为什么要拍 |
[02:40] | Well, you see, when two people love each other very much, | 我来告诉你啊 当两个人深深相爱时 |
[02:46] | they get a camera and… | 他们会拿出一台摄影机 |
[02:48] | Wait. | 打住 |
[02:49] | When would you even watch it? | 拍了是打算什么时候看 |
[02:51] | After Dexter. | 看完《嗜血法医》后 |
[02:56] | The only reason I’d make a sex tape would be as a teaching tool. | 我要拍的话只有一个原因 就是教对方提高床技 |
[02:59] | You know, get one of those little laser pointers. | 我会用激光笔指着说 |
[03:01] | “More of this, less of that. | 这动作多点 那个少点 |
[03:03] | Whoa, slow down there, cowboy.” | 这里要温柔点 牛仔哥哥 |
[03:06] | Oh, come on, Mel. We’re friends. | 求你了 梅梅 我们是朋友啊 |
[03:08] | You know, we do things for each other. | 为朋友做点什么是应该的 |
[03:09] | Yes, for each other, not to each other. | 没错 为朋友做 不是和朋友做 |
[03:12] | But you asked me to buy you stamps. | 你还要我帮忙买邮票呢 |
[03:15] | Really? | 你不是吧 |
[03:16] | You’re comparing buying stamps with making a sex tape? | 居然把买邮票和拍性爱录像相提并论 |
[03:19] | No, no, you’re right. | 是啊 你说得对 |
[03:20] | I mean, buying stamps is so much worse. | 买邮票操劳多了 |
[03:21] | I have to go to the Post Office. You just have to go upstairs. | 我还得去邮局 你上个楼就行了 |
[03:25] | No. No, not in a million years. | 不 你别指望了 |
[03:27] | No, never. | 打死也不行 |
[03:28] | I am loving the passion. | 我很欣赏你的激情 |
[03:31] | You know, my therapist doesn’t believe me | 我跟心理医生讲这些事 |
[03:33] | when I tell him these stories. | 他根本就不相信 |
[03:35] | What’s that, dear? | 亲爱的 你说什么 |
[03:37] | Dummy says he thinks you’re too far gone for therapy. | 傻蛋说 你病入膏肓 心理医生也救不了了 |
[03:42] | Well, then good-bye, old, useless dummy. | 那么拜拜了 又老又没用的傻蛋 |
[03:46] | and your dog. | 拜拜了 狗狗 |
[04:03] | Oh, perfect! | 见鬼 |
[04:05] | Is it too much to ask for coffee lids that fit coffee cups? | 杯盖紧紧盖在咖啡杯上 这要求很过分吗 |
[04:08] | Tell me about it. | 可不是嘛 |
[04:12] | The place downstairs, right? | 楼下的咖啡店 对吗 |
[04:14] | And the lines are so long… | 排队的人可多了 |
[04:16] | everyone with their complicated drink orders now. | 个个点的咖啡都是要求多多 |
[04:18] | This morning, I’m in line for 20 minutes | 今天早上 我排了20分钟的队 |
[04:20] | and the woman in front of me finally gets to the counter | 我前面的这位女士终于排到柜台前了 |
[04:22] | and the guy says, “What can I get you?” | 店员问 “请问喝什么” |
[04:24] | And she says, “Let me think.” | 她却说 “让我想想” |
[04:28] | I mean, what was she thinking about for the last 20 minutes? | 排队的这20分钟 她神游到哪里去了 |
[04:30] | At least your guy said, “What can I get you?” | 至少这位店员说 “请问喝什么” |
[04:32] | Mine said, “What can I do you for?” | 我那位说 “要我干什么”[怎么才能干你] |
[04:35] | I hate that. | 真讨厌 |
[04:36] | People are so annoying. | 这些人说话真烦 |
[04:37] | People are the worst. | 真是糟糕透了 |
[04:39] | – Hi, I’m Joy. – I’m Gordon. | -你好 我叫乔依 -我叫戈登 |
[04:44] | I’m sorry, but what time is your appointment? | 不好意思 请问你约的几点 |
[04:46] | It’s 12:00. | 12点 |
[04:47] | Mine must be 1:00. | 我的肯定是1点了 |
[04:48] | I hate bloody daylight savings time. | 我恨死夏时制了 |
[04:50] | Me, too. It’s like jet lag, | 我也是 就像倒时差 |
[04:52] | but you don’t get to go anywhere. | 却又不需要去另外的时区 |
[04:54] | That would make a good tweet. | 这要是发推特简直太赞了 |
[04:56] | – I hate Twitter. – Me, too! | -我讨厌推特 -我也是 |
[04:58] | Okay, I’m gonna go out on a limb here. | 这个问题可能有争议性 |
[05:01] | Recycling. | 废品回收 |
[05:02] | Hate it. | 讨厌 |
[05:03] | I mean, I do it, but it’s so annoying. | 我会按要求做 可真是烦死了 |
[05:05] | It’s like high-maintenance garbage. | 这些垃圾可真是难以伺候 |
[05:09] | You know, I know why I’m here, | 我是有问题才来啦 |
[05:10] | but I don’t see how a beautiful woman like you | 可我想不通 像你这么漂亮的女人 |
[05:13] | could possibly need a therapist. | 怎么会需要看心理医生呢 |
[05:15] | I would think you could just solve your problems | 我觉得你有任何问题 |
[05:16] | by looking in the mirror. | 看看镜中的自己就解决了 |
[05:18] | Unless your problem’s narcissism. | 除非你的问题在于你是个自恋狂 |
[05:22] | So why are you seeing Dr. Morgan? | 你为什么来看摩根医生 |
[05:24] | I’m sorry, but I don’t know you that well. | 抱歉 我们还不是太熟 |
[05:26] | That’s true. I could be some kind of violent psychopath | 防人之心不可无 我可能是急需治疗的 |
[05:29] | in need of serious treatment. | 有暴力倾向的神经病 |
[05:32] | Are you? | 你是吗 |
[05:35] | No. | 不是 |
[05:36] | You? | 你呢 |
[05:37] | – Joy? – No. | -乔依 -不是 |
[05:38] | – What? – I’m sorry. I was answering his question. | -什么 -不好意思 我是在回答他的问题 |
[05:40] | No, I’m not a psychopath. | 不 我没有精神病 |
[05:43] | Right, Dr. Morgan? | 是吧 摩根医生 |
[05:44] | You know I can’t talk about specifics in front of patients. | 在病人前 我不能讨论详细病情 |
[05:46] | Yes, but you can say that much, can’t you? | 可这句话你可以说啊 |
[05:48] | “She’s not a psychopath.” I’m giving you permission. | “她不是精神病” 我批准你说 |
[05:51] | Joy, isn’t your appointment an hour from now? | 乔依 你约的时间不是一小时后吗 |
[05:54] | Let’s talk about it then, okay? | 我们到时再说 好吗 |
[05:56] | Okay. | 好吧 |
[05:57] | But I’m not a psychopath. | 但我不是精神病 |
[05:59] | Gordon? | 戈登 |
[06:04] | I’ll see you in an hour? | 一小时后见了 |
[06:05] | See you in an hour. | 一小时后见 |
[06:14] | You know what, I’m gonna double up next week. | 我下周约两次好了 |
[06:16] | I’d rather spend the next hour with you. | 下面这个小时 我更想和你在一起 |
[06:18] | You like Mexican food? | 你喜欢墨西哥菜吗 |
[06:19] | – Hate it. – Me, too. | -讨厌 -我也是 |
[06:24] | It’s chilly in here. | 有点冷哦 |
[06:26] | I’ll either have to get my sweater or knit faster. | 我要么去拿毛衣 要么织快点 |
[06:29] | I’ll turn up the thermostat as soon as I finish these bills. | 等我搞定这些账单 就去开暖气 |
[06:39] | And I’m out of stamps. | 邮票用完了 |
[06:41] | Who do you have to sleep with in this place to get stamps? | 要跟谁上床才能弄到邮票啊 |
[06:43] | Oh, yeah… Victoria. | 是哦 要跟维多利亚上床 |
[06:47] | Oh, here’s my sweater right here. | 原来我的毛衣在这里 |
[06:52] | Oh, poor Dummy. | 可怜的傻蛋 |
[06:54] | The only thing he can do is shed. | 唯一会做的就是掉毛 |
[06:58] | I just met the greatest guy. | 我刚刚碰到了绝世好男人 |
[07:00] | Oh, congratulations. Where? | 恭喜了 在哪里碰到的 |
[07:02] | At my therapist’s office. | 心理医生那里 |
[07:03] | Oh, a more cautious congratulations. | 这句恭喜还得斟酌一下 |
[07:06] | No, no, it’s okay. | 不 没事的 |
[07:07] | I mean, obviously, he’s screwed up, | 虽然很明显 他有毛病 |
[07:09] | but we had such a connection. | 但我们非常合拍 |
[07:11] | There’s a chance we are screwed up | 说不定我们的心理问题 |
[07:13] | in completely complimentary ways. | 就是让我们相遇的美好机缘 |
[07:16] | What’s he like? | 他是什么样的人 |
[07:17] | Well, that’s what we’re about to find out. | 我们很快就能知晓了 |
[07:19] | What are all those files? | 这是什么档案 |
[07:22] | When Dr. Morgan left to take a phone call, | 摩根医生出去接电话时 |
[07:24] | I noticed Gordon’s files on his desk, | 我发现戈登的病历就在桌上 |
[07:26] | so let’s divide them up and look for red flags. | 我们把病历分分 找找他的危险之处 |
[07:29] | – All right. – You stole his files? | -好的 -你偷了他的病历 |
[07:32] | Isn’t that a little unethical? | 这样不太道德吧 |
[07:33] | I know, and I wouldn’t have done it, | 我知道 我也不想这样 |
[07:35] | but I might be deported in a month, | 但我可能一个月后就被遣返了 |
[07:37] | and I don’t have two years to get to know him | 我可没有两年的时间去了解他 |
[07:39] | to see if he’s marriage material or not. | 看他适不适合当我老公 |
[07:41] | Well, I think it’s brilliant. | 我觉得这是高招 |
[07:42] | I wish I’d seen my third ex-husband’s files before we got married. | 我倒希望在结婚前 能看看第三任前夫的病历 |
[07:46] | Although, I suppose he could have hid | 不过 我想在心理医生前 |
[07:48] | his being gay even from his therapist. | 他可能都会隐藏自己是同性恋的真相 |
[07:50] | He was president of the Victoria Chase Fan Club. | 他是维多利亚·蔡斯影迷会的会长 |
[07:53] | I don’t think he was hiding it from anyone. | 我觉得人家丝毫隐藏之心都没有 |
[07:56] | The fan club hasn’t been the same since we lost him. | 失去他之后 影迷会便每况愈下了 |
[08:01] | This person’s a psycho! | 这个人是个疯子 |
[08:04] | That’s my file! | 那是我的病历 |
[08:09] | You stole your file, too? | 你连自己的病历也偷了 |
[08:11] | Wouldn’t you? | 你不会吗 |
[08:12] | Well, yeah, I would, yeah. | 是的 我也会偷的 |
[08:15] | Oh, this is great. | 太好了 |
[08:16] | It says Gordon likes assertive women. | 这上面说戈登喜欢果断的女性 |
[08:18] | I’m assertive. I stole these files. | 我很果断 我偷了病历 |
[08:22] | Ooh, it says he’s ready to get married soon, | 这上面说他已经准备好马上结婚 |
[08:24] | so no commitment issues. | 看来他没有婚姻恐惧症 |
[08:26] | And here are his sex fantasies. | 这里有他的性幻想 |
[08:29] | Oh, look, a particular favorite of yours, I believe. | 这个正是你最喜欢的 没错吧 |
[08:31] | Yes! | 正是 |
[08:33] | I won’t even need a laser pointer. | 看来连激光笔都不需要了 |
[08:35] | Oh, and he also has the standard girl-on-girl fantasies | 原来他也喜欢女女性爱戏码啊 |
[08:38] | that everyone loves. | 这可是无人不爱的 |
[08:41] | Not everyone. | 还是有人不爱 |
[08:43] | He hates walks on the beach, too. | 他也讨厌在沙滩上散步 |
[08:45] | Again, this is all about my career. | 再说一遍 这关系到我的前程 |
[08:48] | I mean, the sex is just simulation. | 做爱场面是假的 |
[08:50] | It’s only my desperation that’s real. | 只有我那绝望的拼命劲儿是真的 |
[08:54] | Uh-oh. This says Gordon has… | 不好 戈登… |
[08:56] | Oh, please, don’t say peanut allergy. | 打住 别说他对花生过敏 |
[08:57] | That just freaks me out. | 我最怕这个了 |
[08:59] | They eat the wrong thing, their head swells up like a basketball, | 一旦吃错东西 头就肿得跟篮球似的 |
[09:01] | and there goes your evening. | 美好夜晚也就去球了 |
[09:04] | No, he has a heightened fear | 不 他尤其害怕 |
[09:06] | of being spied on or watched. | 被调查或被监视 |
[09:09] | That’s all? | 就这样吗 |
[09:11] | Don’t you see? | 还不明白吗 |
[09:12] | We’re doing what he fears most. | 我们正做着他最害怕的事 |
[09:14] | We’re making his nightmares come true. | 我们让他的噩梦成真了 |
[09:18] | Hey, I’m in your file. | 你的病历里有提到我呀 |
[09:22] | P.S. Right back at ya. | 这些话老娘统统回敬给你 |
[09:26] | Oh, that must be Jasmine Breeze. | 一定是”轻风小茉莉”来了 |
[09:28] | Who? | 谁 |
[09:29] | Well, when you wouldn’t co-star in my fake sex tape, | 你们不愿出镜我的假性爱录像 |
[09:32] | I hired a professional. | 我雇了位专业的 |
[09:34] | You hired a hooker? | 你雇了妓女吗 |
[09:35] | She comes from a very classy escort service. | 人家可是高级三陪公司旗下的 |
[09:38] | You can tell because | 可不是嘛 |
[09:39] | the a-s-s in “Classy” is capitalized. | “高级”里的ASS[屁股]三个字母可是大写的[屁股] |
[09:43] | All right, all you have to do is hold the camera. | 好了 你当摄影师就行 |
[09:46] | Here’s the power button, | 这是开关 |
[09:47] | and there’s the zoom, and… | 这是推近放大 |
[09:49] | Oh, although it’s high-def, so, you know, don’t zoom. | 这可是高清的 别推近了 |
[10:07] | You want a cup of tea? | 要来杯茶吗 |
[10:09] | I’m good. | 我不用了 |
[10:12] | You know, um, while we’re waiting, | 等着也是等着 |
[10:14] | I’m just… I’ve been wondering something. | 有个问题要请教下 |
[10:16] | See, I’m out in the dating world again after a very long marriage, | 我结束了多年的婚姻 重返情场 |
[10:19] | and, um, well, you would know, | 你肯定知道啦 |
[10:21] | what is it that guys are really looking for these days? | 时下男人到底好哪口儿啊 |
[10:24] | Well, it’s more what you say than what you do. | 其实吧 说的比做的重要 |
[10:31] | But you still gotta do it, too. | 但该做的还是要做 |
[10:35] | Right, got it. | 对 明白了 |
[10:37] | You know, they say the most erotic organ is the brain. | 据说最能激发性欲的器官是大脑 |
[10:39] | Yeah, I get a lot of requests for the brain. | 是啊 “好多”客人要求刺激大脑呢 |
[10:45] | I’m sorry I’m late. | 抱歉我来迟了 |
[10:46] | – I was just putting the finishing touches on the script. – Script? | -我刚给剧本润完色 -剧本 |
[10:51] | “I can’t believe I’m making love | 「真不敢相信我居然在和 |
[10:53] | to Daytime Emmy-winner Victoria Chase.” | 日间艾美奖得主维多利亚·蔡斯做爱」 |
[10:56] | Do people really talk about your awards when they’re in bed with you? | 真有人和你上床时恭维你得奖的事吗 |
[10:59] | Well, they do if they’re smart. | 聪明的自然知道说了有好处 |
[11:01] | Wait. Script, camera, uh… | 等等 剧本 摄像机 |
[11:04] | I get paid extra for being a porn star. | 要我做色情片女星可得加钱 |
[11:06] | Now, wait a minute. Why is everyone in porn a “Star”? | 别激动 为什么演个性爱录像就成了女星 |
[11:09] | Are there no porn character actors? | 就不能说是性爱录像女演员吗 |
[11:11] | Look, Jasmine Breeze, I don’t have any more money. | 轻风小茉莉 我没有多的钱给你 |
[11:14] | Now, this video is gonna get me work, and when I get paid, | 拍了这段我就有戏接 有戏就有钱 |
[11:17] | – I promise that I’ll pay you. – Promise? | -我保证到时会付给你 -保证 |
[11:19] | Promises don’t pay my tuition to Law school. | “保证”二字可没法付我上法学院的学费 |
[11:23] | You’re in Law school? | 你在上法学院吗 |
[11:25] | Well, I didn’t have the grades for Dental school. | 我的分数上不了牙科学院呗 |
[11:28] | No video unless you pay double. | 想拍 价钱就得翻倍 |
[11:30] | You know what? Just go. | 行了 滚蛋吧 |
[11:33] | And rest assured, I would have acted your ass off. | 我保证 我的演技本来足以让你在床上屁滚尿流 |
[11:36] | I get paid extra for that, too. | 玩「屁滚尿流」也得加钱 |
[11:43] | Well, this is awkward. | 真够尴尬的 |
[11:46] | No. | 想都别想 |
[11:53] | My problem with modern art is that if I could do it, | 我对现代艺术的看法就是 如果我都能做到 |
[11:55] | it just doesn’t seem like art to me. | 怎么能称之为艺术呢 |
[11:58] | I probably shouldn’t have insulted | 我不该在回声荡漾的大堂里 |
[12:00] | that one piece so loudly in that echoing lobby. | 对那幅作品大声地嘲讽攻击 |
[12:03] | Well, how could you know the artist was standing right behind us? | 你怎会知道那位画家就站在我们后面 |
[12:07] | And I suppose that third-grade class | 我想那班三年级的学生 |
[12:08] | was going to learn those words eventually, right? | 对国骂总有一天会掌握的 早点教育下也好 |
[12:12] | Look, I know we’ve only been dating for a couple of weeks, | 我知道我们才约会几周 |
[12:15] | but there’s something I’d really like to ask you. | 但有件事我真的想问你 |
[12:18] | Yes. | 好的 |
[12:19] | You can eat the french fries off my plate. | 你可以吃我盘里的炸薯条 |
[12:21] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[12:25] | This is a real sense memory. | 往事历历在目 |
[12:27] | You know, I was a chubby kid, | 我小时候很胖 |
[12:29] | so my parents wouldn’t let me order them. | 所以我爸妈不准我点这个 |
[12:31] | But my sister would let me eat hers off of her plate. | 可我姐姐会让我吃她盘里的 |
[12:34] | I really loved her for that. | 她对我的好 我铭记于心 |
[12:36] | What a lucky thing I ordered them then. | 我运气不错嘛 居然点了这个 |
[12:40] | You know me so well. | 你真是太了解我了 |
[12:42] | It’s like we met in a past life or something. | 就好像是今生缘分 前世注定 |
[12:45] | I mean, we have cut through months | 我们完全跳过了 |
[12:46] | of that getting to know you business, | 几个月的了解阶段 |
[12:48] | and we’re connecting on the big stuff. | 我们之间 心有灵犀 |
[12:52] | This feels really right, doesn’t it? | 感觉对极了 是吗 |
[12:53] | It does. | 正是 |
[13:00] | I love an assertive woman. | 我喜欢果断的女性 |
[13:02] | I know. | 我知道 |
[13:04] | Now. | 现在知道了 |
[13:07] | Because you just said it. | 因为你刚刚说过了 |
[13:09] | Kiss me again. | 再吻我吧 |
[13:13] | Well, I suppose I could get publicity the old-fashioned way… | 我看我就用传统的那招吸引眼球好了 |
[13:16] | shoplifting. | 商店行窃 |
[13:18] | Well, Winona Ryder got a lot of press. | 当年媒体铺天盖地地报道薇诺娜·赖德行窃 |
[13:21] | Seriously? Breaking the law? | 至于吗 犯法的事都做 |
[13:23] | Aw, you’re right. I’d just look like a copycat. | 没错 这种做法太山寨了 |
[13:26] | Ooh, you could punch out a paparazzi. | 你可以揍狗仔队嘛 |
[13:28] | If we had paparazzi around then I wouldn’t need the attention. | 如果有狗仔队在盯梢 我还至于花这个力气吗 |
[13:31] | Melanie, where is your head? | 梅兰妮同志 你脑子进水啦 |
[13:35] | Having Tom Brady’s baby might be fun. | 怀了橄榄球明星汤姆·布雷迪的孩子 够劲爆吧 |
[13:38] | Now you’re thinking. | 终于上道了 |
[13:41] | Hey, how was your date with Gordon? | 和戈登的约会怎么样 |
[13:43] | Wonderful. | 好极了 |
[13:45] | What’s wrong? | 到底怎么啦 |
[13:47] | Here. | 来吧 |
[13:48] | Tell us all about it. | 我们好好聊聊 |
[13:51] | I really, really like this guy, | 我真的很喜欢他 |
[13:53] | and not just from his files, but for who he really is. | 不是因为看了病历才喜欢 是真喜欢他这个人 |
[13:57] | So I’ve decided I have to be completely honest with him. | 所以我决定对他全盘托出 |
[14:00] | You’re gonna tell him that you took his file? | 你打算告诉他 你偷了他的病历 |
[14:02] | Oh, god, no, he’ll never know that, or my real birthday. | 才不 这个永远是秘密 我的真实年龄也一样 |
[14:07] | No, I need to tell him I might be deported soon, | 不是 我要告诉他 我可能马上就被遣返了 |
[14:11] | and I’m scared of what his reaction might be. | 我很害怕看到他的反应 |
[14:12] | – He’s gonna be crushed. – Yeah, just like we are. | -他的心都会碎掉 -和我们一样 |
[14:15] | But what if he’s not? | 如果不是呢 |
[14:16] | What if he says, “Oh, that’s too bad, it’s been fun,” | 如果他说 “太遗憾了 和你在一起很开心” |
[14:19] | instead of my secret crazy wish | 而非像我疯狂希望的那样 |
[14:21] | where he says, “Let’s get married and get you a green card | 他能说 “嫁给我吧 这样你就有绿卡了 |
[14:24] | and work this all out”? | 所有难题都解决了” |
[14:26] | Well, maybe you should ask your therapist how to tell him. | 也许你应该问问心理医生该怎么对他说 |
[14:28] | Or better yet, tell Gordon at the therapist’s office. | 也许更好的办法是 在诊所直接告诉戈登 |
[14:32] | That way if he dumps me, | 万一他把我甩了 |
[14:33] | at least I’ll have somewhere to cry for an hour. | 至少还有人可以让我哭诉一个小时 |
[14:39] | I was looking for Dummy. | 我在找傻蛋 |
[14:41] | What’s going on here? | 你们怎么了 |
[14:42] | Oh, we’re just all feeling a little sad. | 大家觉得有点难过 |
[14:44] | All right already, | 好啦好啦 |
[14:46] | I’ll do your sex tape. | 我豁出去帮你拍性爱录像了 |
[14:56] | Oh, god! | 老天 |
[14:57] | Really? | 见鬼 |
[14:59] | Don’t worry about it. | 别担心 |
[15:00] | I brought two. | 我带了两杯 |
[15:02] | And they’re not made of paper, so we don’t have to recycle. | 不是纸制的 连回收都省了 |
[15:05] | Joy, did I get the time wrong this time? | 乔依 这次是我记错时间了吗 |
[15:08] | No. | 不是 |
[15:09] | I knew you’d be here, and… | 我知道你会来 |
[15:11] | There’s something I need to tell you. | 有件事我要告诉你 |
[15:13] | Okay. | 说吧 |
[15:14] | Well, it’s not definite but… | 形势还不明朗 但是 |
[15:16] | I’m having problems with my green card. | 我在申请绿卡方面出了问题 |
[15:18] | And there’s a good chance | 有很大的可能 |
[15:19] | I might be deported very soon. | 我很快会被遣返回国 |
[15:25] | We can’t let that happen. | 我们绝不能让这种事发生 |
[15:27] | I mean, I don’t want that to happen. | 我是说 我不想你被遣返 |
[15:29] | I’m so relieved you said that. | 你这样说我真是松了口气 |
[15:30] | You could stay, right? If someone married you, like in those movies. | 如果结婚的话 你就可以留下了 就像那些电影 |
[15:33] | Oh, I hate those movies, but I would do that. | 我讨厌那些电影 用这招我倒是愿意 |
[15:36] | I hate those movies, too, but I would let you do it. | 我也讨厌那些电影 但我会同意你用这招 |
[15:38] | I mean, we hate too many of the same things not to stay together. | 我们讨厌这么多相同的东西 就该在一起 |
[15:41] | – Cirque du Soleil. – Jazz. | -太阳马戏团 -爵士乐 |
[15:42] | – Flying. – Flying? | -飞行 -飞行 |
[15:43] | Oh, yeah, didn’t I tell you that? | 是啊 我没告诉过你吗 |
[15:45] | Deathly afraid, can’t get on a plane. | 怕得要死 绝对不敢坐飞机 |
[15:47] | That wasn’t in your files. | 你病历里没写啊 |
[15:55] | I went from “I love you” to a restraining order in under ten minutes. | 不到十分钟 “我爱你”变成了限制令 |
[16:00] | On the plus side, that’s a personal best for me. | 往好处想 这是我的最佳成绩 |
[16:03] | Honey, I’m so sorry. | 亲爱的 真替你难过 |
[16:04] | Oh, so am I. | 我也是 |
[16:06] | I swear, I haven’t felt this hurt | 说真的 凯尔在婚礼上 |
[16:08] | since Kyle stood me up at the altar. | 放我鸽子后 我还是第一次觉得这么伤心 |
[16:10] | I know it doesn’t make any sense. | 我知道这说不通 |
[16:12] | I’ve only known Gordon for a few weeks. | 我才认识戈登几个星期 |
[16:15] | I wonder what Dr. Morgan would say | 如果摩根医生还愿意治疗我的话 |
[16:16] | if he were still speaking to me. | 我想知道他会怎么说 |
[16:19] | He’d say you’re finally letting your intimacy barriers down. | 他会说 对于感情你终于开始卸下心防 |
[16:23] | And allowing yourself to feel pain? | 允许自己感受到痛苦 |
[16:25] | It’s a real step forward in dealing with your abandonment issues. | 在打开被遗弃的心结方面 前进了一大步 |
[16:28] | It has been a recurring theme in your last ten sessions. | 在你过去的十次治疗里 这是反复出现的主题 |
[16:36] | You all read my file. | 你们都看了我的病历 |
[16:39] | Wouldn’t you? | 你不会看吗 |
[16:42] | Yes. | 当然看了 |
[16:44] | And maybe you’re right. | 也许你们说得对 |
[16:45] | Maybe I have made a little emotional progress. | 我那颗破碎的心开始慢慢愈合了 |
[16:48] | I guess I should be happy I’m so miserable. | 看来我这么悲催是值得高兴的事 |
[16:57] | Dummy says he feels bad for you. | 傻蛋说它替你感到难过 |
[17:02] | What’s that, Dummy? | 傻蛋 你说什么 |
[17:03] | There’s a pitcher of margaritas trapped in the fridge? | 一大罐玛格丽特酒被困在冰箱里了 |
[17:14] | Well, floozies, | 放荡的妹子们 |
[17:16] | Dummy has a home right here. | 这里以后就是傻蛋的家了 |
[17:19] | Oh, yay! | 万岁 |
[17:20] | – That’s wonderful. – Yay! | -太好了 -好耶 |
[17:23] | And look how happy he is. | 看它多开心啊 |
[17:27] | Well, we finally have a man in the house. | 这屋子里终于有雄性了 |
[17:30] | And he’s big and hairy like a Cleveland man. | 它个头又大又多毛 很像克利夫兰男人 |
[17:33] | And frightened of the thunder like an L.A. man. | 打个雷都害怕 很像洛杉矶男人 |
[17:37] | Even if he can’t do anything else, he made me feel better. | 虽然它什么也不能做 却让我心里舒坦些了 |
[17:40] | Maybe he can console us when one of us loses a man. | 也许我们被男人甩了后 它可以安慰我们 |
[17:43] | Oh, get your rest, Dummy. | 抓紧时间休息下吧 傻蛋 |
[17:51] | Oh, my agent says to hold off on the sex tape. | 我经纪人说 性爱录像的事先缓缓 |
[17:54] | There might be an opening on Celebrity Rehab. | 《名人戒瘾康复所》可能差人[真人秀] |
[18:05] | Oh, they just want to figure out which addiction | 他们要琢磨出哪种瘾症 |
[18:07] | is gonna get me the most camera time. | 会让我有最多的出镜机会 |
[18:11] | How come I can’t restart my career? | 为什么我没法开启事业第二春 |
[18:14] | And how come I can’t hang onto a man? | 为什么男人都会离我而去 |
[18:16] | And how come every time I drink margaritas, | 为什么每次喝玛格丽特 |
[18:18] | I feel like I could have sex with anyone? | 我就感觉和谁滚床单都没问题 |
[18:22] | Now you tell me? | 你怎么不早说 |