时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:00] | – Dad, we need to talk. – Is it about the bees? | – 爸 咱得谈谈 – 谈什么 那些蜜蜂吗 |
[00:03] | – Bees? – We’re throwing | -蜜蜂 -两周后 |
[00:05] | a housewarming party in two weeks. | 我们准备开一个暖房派对 |
[00:07] | Oh. | 哦 |
[00:08] | It’s gonna be friends,neighbors… | 朋友们啊 邻居们啊都要过来 |
[00:09] | Did he say… did he say “bees”? | 他刚才说的是 他说的是蜜蜂吗 |
[00:11] | Yeah. Marshall’s been working very long hours lately, | 是啊 马修这几天没日没夜地工作 |
[00:14] | so I have been planning this whole party by myself, | 所以我只好一个人准备这个派对 |
[00:17] | and everything’s in place: the food, the wine. | 所有东西都买齐了 吃的 喝的 |
[00:20] | I even found a rare Gouda on the Internet. | 我还从网上买了一块很赞的高达奶酪 |
[00:23] | Oh. | 噢 |
[00:24] | Getting back to these bees… | 回到蜜蜂的话题 |
[00:25] | Bottom line: this party is very important to me, | 不管如何 这个派对对我来说很重要 |
[00:28] | so I can only assume– and I say this with love– | 所以我觉得 当然我是充满爱意说的 |
[00:32] | you’re gonna ruin it. | 你肯定会把派对搞砸了 |
[00:33] | Lily, I promise I won’t ruin your party. | 莉莉 我保证不会搞砸你的派对 |
[00:36] | I’ll be charming and convivial. | 我保证表现得又迷人又有爱 |
[00:38] | A regular Burt Reynolds. | 表现得像正常的伯特・雷诺(美国一影星) |
[00:39] | You have absolutely nothing to worry about. | 你真没什么需要顾虑的 |
[00:41] | Tell us about the bees! | 给我们讲讲蜜蜂的事儿 |
[00:43] | Well, all right, since you asked. | 好吧 既然你问了 |
[00:45] | I’m starting up a business | 我开始做养蜂这一行了 |
[00:47] | cultivating all-organic, artisanal honey. | 生产全有机的 全手工制作的蜂蜜 |
[00:49] | That’s right, I’m a job creator. | 没错 我在创业 |
[00:52] | Oh. So this party… | 喔 那么这场派对 |
[00:55] | Oh, Lily, wait. Um, if you don’t mind, | 噢 莉莉 等等 呃 如果你不介意的话 |
[00:56] | I just, I have one follow-up. | 我 还有个小问题 |
[00:59] | Where are you doing this exactly? | 你在哪儿做这个呢 |
[01:02] | Downstairs– there’s 10,000 bees in the basement. | 楼下啊 地下室里有一万只蜜蜂 |
[01:07] | 老爸老妈浪漫史 | |
[01:15] | 祝大家元宵节快乐 | |
[01:19] | – Why would you even say that?! – It’s the most ridic.. | -你干嘛那样讲话 -简直太… |
[01:22] | Happy Housewarming | 暖房快乐 |
[01:24] | Hey Guys | 嘿 伙计们 |
[01:25] | Robin here has spent | 罗宾用了一整天的时间 |
[01:27] | 鸡蛋蒸锅是类似馅饼一样的犹太人食物,一般由鸡蛋面或土豆做成,其中还放入诸多配料 | |
[01:27] | all day learning how to make kugel. | 学做鸡蛋蒸锅 |
[01:29] | Zabar为曼哈顿上西区知名超市 | |
[01:29] | Couldn’t figure it out– this is from Zabar’s. | 不过没学会 这是从扎巴餐厅买的 |
[01:31] | Can we heat it up in your oven? | 能用你家烤箱加热下吗 |
[01:32] | Faster than heating it up in the refrigerator. | 哈 用烤箱总比用冰箱加热快一些 |
[01:36] | I’ve had a few cocktails. | 我喝了几杯鸡尾酒 |
[01:37] | – I got it. – Take that. | -给我吧 -拿着吧 |
[01:40] | Kids, someday you’re gonna throw a party, | 孩子们 有一天你们要办一个派对 |
[01:42] | and you might find yourself worrying | 那时候你就会担心 |
[01:44] | if something’s gonna go wrong. | 一些事情要出岔子 |
[01:45] | Well, don’t. | 不用担心 |
[01:47] | What you should worry about is everything going wrong. | 你实际要担心的是所有事情都要出岔子 |
[01:51] | And what’s really scary is how quickly that can happen. | 出事速度之快 绝对让你胆寒 |
[01:55] | At Lily and Marshall’s housewarming party | 比如莉莉和马修的暖房派对 |
[01:57] | for instance, it only took five minutes. | 就只用了5分钟 |
[02:00] | Now, a lot happened in those five minutes. | 在这5分钟里发生了很多事 |
[02:03] | You know what? I’m gonna take this room by room. | 知道吗 我打算一个屋一个屋的说 |
[02:07] | We’ll start in the living room. | 先从起居室说起 |
[02:12] | Oh, no, that’s not what you want. | 哦 不好 那可不行 |
[02:14] | – What? – Oh, nothing. So, you think | – 啥 – 没事儿 你觉得 |
[02:16] | this is going pretty well? | 你觉得这个派对怎么样 |
[02:17] | Baby, are you kidding? | 宝贝 你开玩笑呢 |
[02:19] | You single-handedly pulled off the party of the year. | 你一手操办了本年度最棒派对 |
[02:21] | Oh, stop it. I used both hands. | 不要说了啦 人家用了两只手嘛 |
[02:24] | So, what can I do to help? | 那么 我能帮你干点什么 |
[02:25] | Honey, this is your first night off in however long. | 亲爱的 你好不容易才休息一次 |
[02:28] | You just relax and keep knocking back those cocktails. | 你就好好歇着 喝点小酒 |
[02:31] | Mr. Cootes. | 库茨先生 |
[02:32] | Hey, isn’t it nice to finally have a night off? | 终于能休息一晚上 感觉挺好吧 |
[02:35] | It is. But tonight is not that night. | 是啊 但今晚轮不着咱们休息 |
[02:38] | We’re going back to the office in 45 minutes. | 45分钟后我们得赶回公司 |
[02:40] | But, sir, this is our housewarming party. | 先生 可这是我们的暖房派对啊 |
[02:42] | You know, Mother Earth is also having | 你知道么 地球母亲也正在开一个 |
[02:44] | a “housewarming” party, too, | 暖 房派对 |
[02:47] | only hers ends with humankind at the bottom of a rising ocean, | 只是她的派对是以海面上升 人类沉到海底 |
[02:51] | passing through the digestive tract of a stingray. | 被黄貂鱼吃进肚子告终的 |
[02:54] | By the way, it’s a lovely home. | 不管怎样 你家真漂亮 |
[02:56] | Mr. Cootes, I know you’re a vegan, so I, uh, | 库茨先生 我知道您是素食主义者 所以我 |
[03:00] | I got some vegan spring rolls for you over there. | 在那儿给您准备了几个素馅春卷 |
[03:03] | Oh, nummies! | 噢 美味哟 |
[03:07] | You’re going back to work? | 你要赶回去工作 |
[03:08] | Sheez, Marshall, you are as busy as a… | 诶哟 马修 你简直跟那啥一样忙 |
[03:11] | Oh, gosh, what are you as busy as? | 哦 对了 你跟啥一样忙来着 |
[03:15] | Please don’t talk about the bees. | 求求你别说蜜蜂 |
[03:16] | I was gonna say Nicolas Cage. | 其实我想说你跟尼古拉斯・凯奇一样忙 |
[03:18] | That guy is in everything. | 那爷们啥都演 |
[03:20] | Let’s just put on some music. | 咱放点音乐吧 |
[03:26] | I’ll, uh, I’ll bring out the Gouda, | 我 呃 我去把高达奶酪拿出来 |
[03:28] | we’ll open a couple bottles of wine… | 我们开几瓶红酒 |
[03:30] | that are in the basement. | 可那些红酒在地下室 |
[03:32] | All right, I’ll get my beekeeper’s suit. | 好吧 我去拿养蜂人的防护服去 |
[03:34] | You should be happy about the bees. | 你们该因为蜜蜂高兴 |
[03:35] | They’re keeping the mice at bay. | 它们把老鼠困在了地下室 |
[03:37] | We have mice? | 这儿还有老鼠 |
[03:38] | Not with all these bees | 不过蜜蜂到处飞 |
[03:39] | flying around, we don’t. | 就没有了 |
[03:41] | You’re welcome. | 不用客气哈 |
[03:44] | Ted, baby Gouda’s coming out. Look alive. | 泰德 小高达要出来了 表现得活跃点 |
[03:51] | Are you a vegan? | 你是素食主义者吗 |
[03:52] | What? | 啥 |
[03:53] | Ooh-ee! | 喔咿 |
[03:55] | Kitchen, now. | 来厨房 现在 |
[03:58] | I can’t believe that he’s making us go to work tonight. | 我真不敢相信库茨非要我们晚上加班 |
[04:01] | Are… you… a… vegan? | 你 是不是 一个 素食主义者 |
[04:04] | Um, no. | 嗯 不是的 |
[04:06] | Uh-huh. And when you were shoveling | 好的 那当你一口口地把春卷咽下去的时候 |
[04:09] | the spring rolls down your gullet, did you happen to notice | 有没有注意到放春卷的盘子上 |
[04:12] | a little sign next to the plate marked “Vegan”? | 清晰地标着 素食者专用 |
[04:14] | I think there’s been some mistake. | 我觉着咱俩之间有点儿误会 |
[04:16] | You could have had anything on that table! | 你可以吃了那桌上的任何东西 |
[04:19] | Anything at all! | 任何 东西 |
[04:22] | Mini pizzas, bacon-wrapped figs, | 迷你披萨饼 培根卷无花果 |
[04:25] | pigs in blankets. | 猪肉肠面包卷 |
[04:26] | There was even talk of an inbound Gouda! | 据说甚至还有原产地的高达奶酪 |
[04:28] | But no, no, you had to have the one thing | 但是 不 不 你居然唯独吃了那一样东西 |
[04:30] | that someone with my dietary preferences can eat. | 像我这样的素食者唯一可以吃的东西 |
[04:33] | Look, I didn’t eat the spring rolls. | 听着 我没有吃春卷 |
[04:35] | Liar! | 骗子 |
[04:37] | Your breath reeks of shredded carrots and deceit! | 你的呼吸里都带着一丝丝胡萝卜和欺骗的恶臭 |
[04:42] | Okay, okay, maybe I did eat your precious spring rolls. | 好的 好的 或许我确实吃了你的春卷 |
[04:47] | Oh… | 哦 |
[04:48] | What are you gonna do about it, hippie? | 你又能把我怎么样呢 你这个小嬉皮士 |
[04:53] | It’s fine. Everything’s fine. | 没事 一切顺利 |
[04:55] | Young man, | 年轻人 |
[04:58] | are you suggesting fisticuffs… | 你是在挑衅 |
[05:01] | as in with our fists? | 要跟我用拳头一绝高低么 |
[05:03] | And feet– I’m a kicker. | 不仅仅是拳头 还有脚 我腿法了得 |
[05:06] | Well, well, looks like I just started eating | 好好好 这感觉就像 |
[05:09] | white meat again. | 我回归食肉了那样 |
[05:11] | I will bite and scratch you like a wolverine. | 我会像一只狼灌一样撕咬你的 |
[05:15] | May I warn you, | 让我警告你一遍 |
[05:17] | I have been in a fight before. | 我以前可打过架 |
[05:20] | So have I… sort of. | 我也打过 一丢丢 |
[05:23] | Oh, God. | 哦 天呐 |
[05:26] | Mr. Cootes. Hi. | 库茨先生 嗨 |
[05:28] | Did you see that we had hummus and veggies? | 你看见我们那儿放了豆沙和蔬菜么 |
[05:31] | There’s hummus and veggies? | 豆沙和蔬菜 |
[05:33] | Over there. | 就在那儿 |
[05:34] | Hey, I’m not gonna let that guy push me around. | 嘿 我可不会再任人宰割了 |
[05:37] | I believe it was Sun Tzu who wrote, “Never give up. | 我可坚信孙子兵法里有 |
[05:40] | Never surrender.” | 永不言败 永不投降 |
[05:41] | -Shut up, Ted. -Okay. | -闭嘴 泰德 -好的 |
[05:42] | For God’s sake, Lily, you’re pregnant. | 老天啊 莉莉 你可是怀孕了的 |
[05:47] | For God’s sake, Ted,Lily’s pregnant. | 老天啊 泰德 莉莉可是怀孕了的 |
[05:54] | Oh, man. | 哦 天啊 |
[05:56] | Sorry about that. | 非常抱歉发生了这种事 |
[05:57] | I don’t need this right now, Ted. | 我现在不需要你的抱歉 泰德 |
[05:59] | I shouldn’t do this. | 我不该这么做的 |
[06:01] | – I shouldn’t do this. – What? | -我不该这么做啊 -怎么了 |
[06:02] | This is a bad idea. This is a bad idea! | 这个主意糟透了 这个主意糟透了 |
[06:06] | – What is? – I should just go. I should just go! | -到底怎么了 -我应该现在闪人 现在就走 |
[06:08] | Okay, okay, just tell me what is going on. | 好吧 好吧 告诉我到底发生了什么 |
[06:11] | I love my penis, Robin. | 我爱我的弟弟 罗宾 |
[06:14] | Oh, Barney, you promised. | 哦 巴尼 你承诺过的 |
[06:16] | I do! I love it! | 我是承诺过 我爱它 |
[06:19] | If I could kiss it, I would. | 如果我可以亲到它的话 我会去亲的 |
[06:21] | I’d be lying if I told you I hadn’t tried. | 如果我跟你说我没试过 那我一定在撒谎 |
[06:23] | I’m not comfortable with this conversation. | 这话题让我感觉到不爽 |
[06:26] | Oh, come on, Robin, it’s my penis we’re talking about. | 哦 别这样啊罗宾 我们可是在谈论我的弟弟 |
[06:29] | – You’ve seen her– she’s magnificent. – She? | -你曾经见过她 她是多么的神奇 -她 |
[06:32] | Every penis is a girl, Robin. Everyone knows that. | 每一个小弟弟都是个姑娘 罗宾 所有人都知道 |
[06:35] | Like… ships and lake monsters. | 就好像 水怪和船都是姑娘一样 |
[06:40] | And Gouda! | 还有高达 |
[06:42] | She’s a beauta. | 她很美哒 |
[06:43] | Oh, Gouda. | 哦 高达奶酪 |
[06:45] | Well, I’ll be back. | 好吧 我会回来的 |
[06:47] | Most of me, anyway. | 不管怎么样 我身体的大部分会回来的 |
[06:50] | – Don’t eat that. – What? | -别吃这个 -什么 |
[06:51] | Whoops! Oh, it’s ruined. | 我擦 哦 这被毁了 |
[06:53] | It’s not ruined. Ten second rule. | 这没有被毁啊 落地十秒内拿起来还可以吃啊 |
[06:56] | Eight, nine, ten, and it’s ruined. | 八 九 十 好了 它被毁了 |
[06:59] | This whole party’s ruined. | 这整个派对都被毁了 |
[07:01] | I got a basement full of bees, | 我的储藏室里到处都是蜜蜂 |
[07:04] | and Ted almost got into a fight with Mr. Cootes. | 而泰德差点和库茨先生打起来 |
[07:06] | Lily, look around. | 莉莉 看看四周 |
[07:08] | Everyone’s having an amazing time. | 每个人都在享受一段神奇的时光 |
[07:09] | It’s a great party. | 这是个很棒的派对 |
[07:11] | Okay, maybe it’s not a total disaster. | 好吧 或许这不全是一场灾难 |
[07:19] | What the hell was that?! | 那是什么玩意儿 |
[07:28] | So that’s what happened in the living room. | 这就是发生在客厅的事儿 |
[07:31] | Now I’m gonna tell you what happened in the dining room. | 现在让我们把目光转向餐厅 |
[07:35] | Oh, no, that’s not what you want. | 哦 不好 那可不行 |
[07:39] | Man, I can’t believe these are vegan. | 哦 难以置信这些居然是素食 |
[07:42] | I’ve had, like, 20 of ’em. | 我吃了 将近二十个 |
[07:43] | I should get the name of this caterer. | 我该去问问做这个的餐馆的名字 |
[07:45] | It’s my kitten’s Bat Mitzvah next week. | 下礼拜是我那只叫蝙蝠的小猫的成人礼 |
[07:48] | She’s finally becoming a cat. | 她终于真正成为了一只猫 |
[07:50] | Oh, God, you are crazy. | 哦 老天 你真是个疯… |
[07:52] | About cats. | 狂热爱猫的人 |
[07:54] | Cats are so honest and real with their affections. | 猫都很忠诚而且情感真挚 |
[07:58] | Ever since my divorce, | 自从我离婚后 |
[07:59] | it’s just been one liar after another. | 我身边的骗子就像过流水灯一样 |
[08:01] | That’s why it’s so refreshing to meet someone honest like you, | 所以感觉如此新鲜当我遇到了如此诚实的你 |
[08:04] | Special Agent Gary Powers. | 特工咖喱泡沫 |
[08:07] | Listen… | 听着 |
[08:09] | I think we can agree there’s something here. | 我觉得我们之间达成了某种联系 |
[08:12] | Something big… | 某种丰满的 |
[08:14] | that looks and probably feels real. | 看上去很真实 可能感觉也会很真实的联系 |
[08:19] | Maybe… | 或许 |
[08:21] | we can go back to your place. | 我们可以去你的地方 |
[08:22] | I can’t ask you to delay intercepting those asteroids. | 我可不能让你延误了去拦截那些小行星 |
[08:25] | I do need to intercept those asteroids. | 我确实得去拦截那些行星 |
[08:28] | I think we need to have sex right now. | 我感觉我们应该现在就去滚床单 |
[08:31] | Meet me in the upstairs guest bedroom in two minutes. | 两分钟后楼上的客房见 |
[08:37] | I’m just looking for the vegan spring rolls. | 你们知道那斋春卷在哪里吗 |
[08:39] | Last one, sorry. | 不好意思 最后一个我吃了 |
[08:40] | Two minutes. | 两分钟后哦 |
[08:42] | How can they all be gone? The party just started. | 它们怎么就没了 派对才刚开始啊 |
[08:44] | I know, right? | 可不 |
[08:45] | Let’s just put on some music. | 咱放点音乐吧 |
[08:50] | I’ll, uh, I’ll bring out the Gouda, | 我 呃 我去把高达奶酪拿出来 |
[08:52] | we’ll open a couple of bottles of wine… | 我们开几瓶红酒 |
[08:54] | that are in the basement. | 可那些红酒在地下室 |
[08:56] | Some jerk was just here. | 有个混蛋刚才在这 |
[08:57] | And he was all, like, | 他就像这样 |
[08:58] | “I can’t believe these are vegan. | 难以置信这些居然是素食 |
[09:00] | I’ve had, like, 20 of ’em.” | 我吃了 将近二十个 |
[09:01] | Point me into the direction of this scoundrel. | 指给我看那个挨千刀的在哪儿 |
[09:04] | Um… it was that guy. | 喏 就是那个家伙 |
[09:07] | Ted, baby Gouda’s coming out. Look alive. | 泰德 小高达要出来了 表现得活跃点 |
[09:11] | Lily, these spring rolls… ooh-ee! | 莉莉 这些春卷 喔咿 |
[09:15] | Kitchen, now. | 来厨房 现在 |
[09:17] | I can’t believe that he’s making us go to work tonight. | 我真不敢相信库茨非要我们晚上加班 |
[09:20] | I mean, I think it’s time that somebody took him aside | 我就是觉得现在得有人把他拉到一个安静点的地方 |
[09:22] | and told him this is not how you treat your staff. | 然后告诉他这么摧残自己的手下是会遭报应的 |
[09:24] | Well, I’m sort of busy with the party right now. | 唔 我现在忙的都脱不开身了 |
[09:28] | Fine. I’ll do it myself. But he’s gonna scream at me, | 好吧 还得我自己来 不过他会朝我大喊大叫的 |
[09:30] | and you know that I can’t stand up to screaming. | 而你知道我最受不了别人吵我大喊大叫了 |
[09:31] | – Just go talk to him! – I think I should go talk to him. | -去和他谈谈 -我也觉得应该和他好好谈谈了 |
[09:36] | – Barney… – Ah, Lily, | -巴尼 -哦 莉莉 |
[09:38] | Ted ate all of the spring rolls. | 春卷都被泰德一人吃光了 |
[09:40] | You could have had anything on that table! | 你可以吃了那桌上的任何东西 |
[09:42] | Mini pizzas, bacon-wrapped figs, | 迷你匹萨饼 培根卷无花果 |
[09:46] | pigs in blankets. | 猪肉肠面包卷 |
[09:47] | There was even talk of an inbound Gouda! | 据说甚至还有原产地的高达奶酪 |
[09:50] | Robin. Okay, listen, I need your help. | 罗宾 嗯 听着 我需要你帮我一下 |
[09:52] | I’m about to get in a screaming match with my boss, | 我马上就要和我的老板来一个对骂比赛了 |
[09:54] | and I’m not good at getting screamed at, | 而且我又不擅长被别人大喊大叫 |
[09:55] | so I need you to warm me up. | 所以我需要你帮我热身 |
[09:57] | – How? – I want you to scream at me. | -怎么热身 -我要你使劲骂我 |
[09:59] | You know, like you do to strangers on the street | 对 就像你被街边的路人甲以一点点小事激怒那样 |
[10:01] | at the slightest provocation. | 对我开炮吧 |
[10:02] | I don’t do that. | 我从来没有过好吧 |
[10:04] | Come on, lay some of that classic Scherbatsky | 来吗 给我点经典的贱人舍巴斯基 |
[10:05] | mean son of a bitch on me. | 向我开炮吧 |
[10:07] | Treat me like I’m a Girl Scout trying to sell you cookies. | 就像那些小童子军向你叫卖曲奇那样对我吧 |
[10:09] | Four dollars a box and you’re out of Thin Mints?! | 四美元一盒 你穷疯了是吗 |
[10:11] | You green little…! I don’t do that! | 你个小绿…… 我不这样的 |
[10:15] | Come on, scream at me. | 麻利点 对我大吼大叫吧 |
[10:16] | Like that. | 就像那样 |
[10:19] | It’s fine. Everything’s fine. | 没事 一切顺利 |
[10:20] | Marshall, there is plenty of stuff | 马修 有很多事情 |
[10:22] | that I don’t get mad about, | 都激怒不了我的 |
[10:24] | like the fact that you’re serving pigs in blankets | 比如你在准备这些猪肉肠面包卷的时候 |
[10:26] | without hot mustard. | 居然没准备芥末 |
[10:28] | I’m not the type of person to be driven crazy by a host | 我可不是那种人 那种就只为这宴会东家连上这道 |
[10:31] | who refuses to provide delicious hot mustard | 猪肉肠面包卷的时候连芥末都不准备 |
[10:34] | in which to dip my pigs in blankets! | 就立马火冒三丈的人 |
[10:35] | I’m the type of girl who… keeps her cool. | 我是那种 让自己冷静下来的妹子 |
[10:38] | Who keeps her cool. | 让自己冷静下来的那种 |
[10:41] | Wait. Whoa, baby, are you okay? | 等下 哇哦 亲爱的 你没事吧 |
[10:44] | Of course. This party is great. | 当然没事了 这派对多好啊 |
[10:46] | I am handling this. Oh, God. | 一切尽在掌握 哦 天呐 |
[10:52] | No… | 别 |
[10:54] | Hummus and veggies? | 豆泥加蔬菜呢 |
[10:55] | I’m looking for hummus and veggies. | 豆泥和蔬菜在哪里啊 |
[10:58] | Robin, can I talk to you about something very dear to me? | 罗宾 我能和你讨论一件对我来说很珍贵的东西吗 |
[11:00] | Promise me this isn’t about your penis. | 你发誓和你的小弟弟无关 |
[11:02] | I promise it isn’t about my penis. | 我保证这绝对和我的小弟弟无关 |
[11:05] | I’m sorry. | 不好意思啊 |
[11:08] | Excuse me, sir, could I talk to you in the kitchen? | 不好意思 头儿 我能和你到厨房说两句话吗 |
[11:17] | Sorry about that. | 实在抱歉啊 |
[11:19] | I don’t need this right now, Ted. | 我现在不需要你的抱歉 泰德 |
[11:20] | I swear, if there’s one more crisis… | 我发誓 要是哪里再出点什么乱子 |
[11:23] | Well, the bees escaped their enclosure, | 好吧 这些蜜蜂都跑出来了 |
[11:25] | but no reason to “Bee” Concerned. | 但这点小事情犯不着大家蜂蜂颠颠的 |
[11:29] | No, there is, we’re in big trouble. | 好吧 我确实惹麻烦了 |
[11:31] | What is that smell? | 你那是什么味道 |
[11:33] | Oh, I doused my suit with kerosene. | 我把我的外套放在煤油里泡了一会儿 |
[11:35] | All beekeepers do this. | 所有的养蜂人都这么干 |
[11:37] | Dad, just take off the suit right now. | 老爸 现在就把这外衣脱了 |
[11:39] | All right, fine. | 好吧 |
[11:40] | Every 30 seconds, | 每30秒 |
[11:42] | there’s another crisis that needs to be dealt with | 就有一个新的麻烦等着去解决 |
[11:44] | and I have to deal with it. | 而且还必须得是我去解决 |
[11:45] | This is… Oh, God. | 简直是 哦天呐 |
[11:48] | This is parenthood, isn’t it? | 当爹妈就是这样吧 是不是 |
[11:50] | So they say. | 过来人都这么说 |
[11:51] | Okay, it’s official. | 好吧 我正式宣布 |
[11:53] | I thought I could do it, but I can’t. | 我以为我可以做到 但是我做不到 |
[11:55] | No, Marshall’s always at work. | 我做不到 马修永远都在工作 |
[11:57] | He’s got to go back tonight. | 他今天晚上就得再回去了 |
[11:58] | And I don’t know if I can handle a life | 而且我实在是不知道我道理能不能处理好 |
[12:00] | that’s just one crisis after another. | 这一波接着一波混乱的人生啊 |
[12:02] | Lily, listen to me. I’m gonna give you a little piece of… | 莉莉 听好了 我要给你一点小 |
[12:05] | Gouda! | 高达 |
[12:06] | God. | 天呐 |
[12:07] | – Crisis? – Crisis. | -又有麻烦了吗 -又有麻烦了 |
[12:10] | – Don’t eat that. Whoops! – What? | -别吃那个 呦 -什么 |
[12:12] | Gouda’s out, Ted. Don’t sleep on the Gouda. | 高达出场了 泰德 别在上面吃睡着了 |
[12:14] | Wouldn’t dream of it. | 我可不想 |
[12:15] | So Lily told me you have to go back to work tonight? | 那么莉莉告诉我说你今晚得回去工作是吧 |
[12:17] | No, I don’t have to go back to work tonight. | 不 我今晚不用回去工作了 |
[12:18] | Mr. Cootes and I came to an understanding. | 库茨先生和我达成了共识 |
[12:20] | But, hey, what’s going on with Robin? | 但是 嘿 罗宾怎么了 |
[12:21] | I called her a mean son of a bitch | 我说她是个自私的婊子 |
[12:23] | and she took it all weird. | 然后她的反应太奇怪了 |
[12:24] | – She did? – Yeah. | -很奇怪吗 -是的 |
[12:26] | Crazy, right? | 不正常 对吧 |
[12:28] | Hey, buddy. | 嘿 大伙儿 |
[12:29] | Best housewarming party ever. | 史上最棒的暖房派对 |
[12:31] | Everybody’s abuzz. | 每个人都嗡嗡的 |
[12:33] | Abuzz. | 嗡嗡的 |
[12:34] | Oh, good one, Mickey. | 噢 一语双关 米奇 |
[12:36] | But, hey, you’re right. | 但是 嘿 你说的很对 |
[12:37] | Great party. | 很棒的派对 |
[12:46] | What the hell was that?! | 到底是怎么回事 |
[12:53] | And that’s what happened in the dining room. | 这就是发生在餐厅的事情 |
[12:57] | Now I’m gonna tell you what happened in the kitchen. | 现在我要告诉你们在厨房发生了什么 |
[13:01] | Oh, no, that’s not what you want. | 哦 不好 那可不行 |
[13:04] | Man, I can’t believe these are vegan. | 哦 难以置信这些居然是素食 |
[13:06] | Back to our fight? | 回到争吵状态 |
[13:08] | Back to our fight. | 回到争吵状态 |
[13:09] | I cannot believe you screamed at that woman at Zabar’s. | 我不敢相信你在扎吧对一个女人大喊大叫 |
[13:11] | She was trying to cut in line. | 她想要插队 |
[13:13] | She was gonna get the last kugel. | 她想要拿走最后一份鸡蛋蒸锅 |
[13:14] | She was 90 years old. | 她已经90高龄了 |
[13:15] | It was probably gonna be her last kugel. | 这可能也是她的最后一份鸡蛋蒸锅了 |
[13:18] | Sometimes in life, you have to be assertive | 有些时候 你需要果断一点 |
[13:19] | and stand up for yourself. | 保护自己利益 |
[13:21] | You called her a whore. | 你管叫她婊子 |
[13:22] | Who wears that much makeup?! | 谁没事化这么浓的妆 |
[13:24] | Old ladies! | 老婆婆们 |
[13:25] | Who take money for sex. Exactly. | 那些卖身换钱的人 太对了 |
[13:28] | Look, I’m sorry. | 听着 我很抱歉 |
[13:29] | If I would’ve left things in your dainty, lily-white, | 如果我把这件事情交给你那白皙秀丽 |
[13:32] | never-ripped- an-old-lady’s-wig-off hands, | 从未薅掉一个老婆婆假发的手里 |
[13:34] | we would be kugel-free right now. | 我们现在就没有鸡蛋蒸锅了 |
[13:36] | Oh, so, what, I’m too nice? | 哦 所以说呢 我太好了 |
[13:37] | You never stand up for yourself. | 你从来不为自己争取 |
[13:39] | Remember that sixth grader who kept stealing your lunch? | 记得那个一直偷你午饭的六年级生么 |
[13:41] | High school was a tough time for me, okay? | 高中是我的艰难时代 好么 |
[13:44] | And that girl was muscular. | 而且那个女孩是肌肉型的 |
[13:46] | Forearms like Popeye. | 手臂跟大力水手一样 |
[13:48] | How do you even know about that? | 你怎么会知道这件事的 |
[13:49] | Marshall told me. He also said that | 马修告诉我的 他还说了 |
[13:51] | you had your mom stop making | 你让你妈妈不再做 |
[13:53] | peanut butter and jelly sandwiches | 果酱和花生酱三明治 |
[13:54] | because of that girl’s nut allergy. | 因为那个女孩对坚果过敏 |
[13:56] | I didn’t want to add to her health problems. | 我不想加重她的身体问题 |
[13:58] | She was already in a wheelchair. | 她已经坐轮椅了 |
[13:59] | Okay, so what? | 好的 所以呢 |
[14:01] | I would rather be nice than be like you, | 我宁愿忍让些也不愿做你这样的人 |
[14:04] | always getting in fights about stuff | 总是跟人争执那些 |
[14:05] | that’s not even worth fighting about. | 鸡毛蒜皮不值得的小事 |
[14:07] | Disagree. | 不同意 |
[14:08] | It’s like Sun Tzu wrote in The Art of War, | 孙子在孙子兵法里面写过 |
[14:10] | “Never give up. Never surrender.” | 永不言败 永不投降 |
[14:13] | That was Tim Allen in Galaxy Quest. | 那是提姆艾伦在星河奇遇里面写的 |
[14:14] | Whatever, dude. | 无论如何 哥们 |
[14:15] | Your problem is any time you’re faced with | 你的问题就是无论何时 |
[14:18] | the least bit of confrontation, you run away. | 面对任何对峙的时候 你就逃跑 |
[14:20] | Oh, I run away from confrontation? | 哦 我在逃避对峙 |
[14:26] | Ted, baby Gouda’s coming out. | 泰德 小高达要出来了 |
[14:28] | Look alive. | 表现得活跃点 |
[14:31] | Whoops. Son of a…! | 哦 你个… |
[14:33] | I’m sorry. | 抱歉 |
[14:34] | Maybe that was my fault. | 也许那是我的错 |
[14:36] | You think? | 你也发现了 |
[14:37] | You’re right in my snack track. | 你挡住了我拿吃的的路 |
[14:39] | Hey, nice beekeeper suit. | 嘿 帅气的养蜂人装束 |
[14:41] | Do you know that, uh, most bees are left-handed? | 你知道么 大多数蜜蜂是左撇子 |
[14:44] | Did you know bees hate the smell of kerosene? | 你知道蜜蜂很讨厌煤油的味道么 |
[14:47] | I knew that. Geez, what do you think, | 我当然知道 天呐 你以为 |
[14:48] | this is my first day as a beekeeper? | 这是我当养蜂人的第一天么 |
[14:51] | Nice. Oh. | 太棒了 哦 |
[14:53] | Is that true about bees and kerosene? | 蜜蜂讨厌煤油是真的么 |
[14:56] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
[14:57] | Barney… | 巴尼 |
[14:59] | Ah, Lily, | 哦 莉莉 |
[15:00] | Ted ate all of the spring rolls. | 春卷都被泰德一人吃光了 |
[15:02] | Barney, that woman you were talking to, | 巴尼 那个跟你说话的女人 |
[15:04] | our neighbor Geraldine, | 也就是我们的邻居杰拉德琳 |
[15:05] | some guy slept with her | 有个人跟她睡了 |
[15:06] | and didn’t call her, so she hunted him down | 却没再打电话给她 于是她追踪到了他 |
[15:09] | and cut off a certain part of his anatomy with a cheese knife. | 然后用一把芝士刀切掉了他身体的某个部分 |
[15:15] | So, whatever you do, | 所以 无论你做什么 |
[15:17] | don’t sleep with her. | 别上她 |
[15:18] | It’s funny, she is, um, waiting for me | 这太有趣了 她在 唔 |
[15:22] | in the guest bedroom right now. | 她正在客卧等着我 |
[15:24] | Oh, God! Oh, God! | 哦 天呐 哦 天呐 |
[15:26] | That was the idea, but now forget it! | 那是原本的打算 但是我现在已经忘了 |
[15:28] | Barney, this is a disaster. | 巴尼 这是一场灾难 |
[15:29] | I swear, if there is one… | 我发誓 只要这里有一个.. |
[15:33] | It’s fine. Everything’s fine. | 没事 一切顺利 |
[15:34] | 十秒法则:掉在地上的东西十秒内捡起来都是干净的 | |
[15:34] | Hey, ten second rule, right? | 嘿 不超过十秒 对吧 |
[15:37] | It’s fine. Everything’s fine. | 没事 一切顺利 |
[15:40] | Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! | 走开 走开 走开 |
[15:42] | I know you’re pregnant, but you need a glass of wine. | 我知道你怀孕了 但你需要来点酒压压惊 |
[15:45] | I got that cheese off the Internet. | 这块奶酪我是从网上买的 |
[15:47] | I know you got it off the Internet. | 我知道你是在网上买的 |
[15:48] | Why does that make it impressive? | 网上买的又咋了 |
[15:50] | You know what else you can find on the Internet? | 你知道网上还有什么吗 |
[15:52] | Zoo animals masturbating. | 动物园里的动物打飞机 |
[15:54] | There’s one of a walrus. | 哥还见过一只海象 |
[15:55] | He’s… | 他 |
[15:56] | Oh. | 噢 |
[16:11] | No… | 别 |
[16:16] | Excuse me, sir, could I talk to you in the kitchen? | 不好意思 头儿 我能和你到厨房说两句话吗 |
[16:26] | Mr. Cootes, I am not going back to work tonight. | 库茨先生 今晚我是不会回去工作的 |
[16:30] | Oh, no, she didn’t just say that. | 喔 她刚刚说了什么 |
[16:33] | Mickey, could we just have a minute? | 米奇 能给我们俩一会儿时间单独谈谈 |
[16:35] | Oh, yeah. Sure. | 哦 好的 当然可以 |
[16:39] | Marshall, look, I know when you started with this firm, | 马修 你看 我知道当你刚来公司的时候 |
[16:42] | it was all fun and games. | 我们的工作看起来很有意思 |
[16:44] | The office chair races were particularly spirited. | 尤其是晋升大战更激动人心 |
[16:48] | Until, of course, Gail went down the stairs. | 直到 呃 盖尔从楼梯上摔了下去 |
[16:51] | But for one brief moment, | 但就在那个瞬间 |
[16:53] | boy, did she fly. | 神哪 我相信她飞起来了 |
[16:57] | I’m not here, I’m not here. | 当我没在 当我没在 |
[17:00] | Mr. Cootes, you’re working yourself to death. | 库茨先生 你是个极品工作狂 |
[17:02] | Just cut loose a little. | 拜托就放松那么一会儿 |
[17:04] | Have a beer, find a hobby. | 来点啤酒 发展发展兴趣爱好 |
[17:07] | Look, son, it’s very simple. | 你看 孩子 道理很简单 |
[17:09] | Um, Mother Earth doesn’t get a night off. | 嗯 地球母亲从来都不休息 |
[17:11] | Neither do you. | 所以你也休想 |
[17:13] | Well, then I quit. | 那好 我辞职 |
[17:18] | And I don’t know if I can handle a life | 我真不知道我能不能去适应这种生活 |
[17:20] | that’s just one crisis after another. | 烦心事一件接一件的发生 |
[17:22] | Lily, listen to me. I’m gonna give you a little piece of… | 莉莉 听好了 我要给你一点小 |
[17:25] | Gouda! | 高达 |
[17:26] | Maybe he’s right. | 他可能是对的 |
[17:27] | Maybe I do need a hobby. | 我或许确实需要培养一个兴趣爱好 |
[17:29] | Well, hey, how about beekeeping? | 呃 嘿 养蜜蜂怎么样 |
[17:31] | Me? No. I-I don’t know the first thing about bees. | 我 不好 关于蜜蜂我是什么都不知道 |
[17:34] | You want to know a secret? | 告诉你个秘密 |
[17:36] | Neither do I. | 我也不懂 |
[17:38] | It’s not a secret. | 这个不是秘密 |
[17:41] | Let me try this thing on. | 我试试这件装备 |
[17:42] | I’m gonna give you some privacy. | 那我回避一下 |
[17:43] | All right, thank you. | 好的 谢谢 |
[17:45] | Okay. | 好 |
[17:46] | Hey, buddy. | 嘿 哥们 |
[17:48] | Best housewarming party ever. | 史上最棒的暖房派对 |
[17:50] | Everybody’s abuzz. | 每个人都嗡嗡的 |
[17:54] | Okay, maybe it’s not a total disaster. | 好吧 貌似没想象中的那么糟 |
[17:57] | Great party. | 很棒的派对 |
[18:10] | Oh, my God. Oh! | 喔 天啊 噢 |
[18:12] | Oh, Mr. Cootes! | 噢 库茨先生 |
[18:13] | Mr. Cootes, are you okay?! | 库茨先生 您还好吧 |
[18:15] | That was amazing! | 爽死了 |
[18:18] | Did you see me?! | 你看见没 |
[18:19] | I flew through the air like a human fireball | 我像个人肉火球一样飞过来 |
[18:22] | and didn’t get a scratch. | 而且居然毫发无损 |
[18:23] | Eat your heart out, Gail! | 羡慕不死你 盖尔 |
[18:25] | God, I feel so alive! | 老天爷 我浑身充满活力 |
[18:28] | I want to drink a beer. | 我想喝点啤酒 |
[18:30] | Oh, yeah. | 哦 好的 |
[18:31] | Okay, one beer, coming right up. | 没问题 啤酒一瓶 即可送上 |
[18:32] | Oh, and, uh, Marshall, | 哦 等等 马修 |
[18:35] | I think we’ll take the night off tonight, okay? | 我想今天晚上我们都放个假 好不 |
[18:39] | Sounds good, yeah. | 听起来不错 好的 |
[18:40] | But I’ll see you Monday? | 但礼拜一你来上班吧 |
[18:42] | Of course. | 那是当然的 |
[18:45] | Yeah. | 说定了 |
[18:47] | You know, Robin, I’ve been thinking about it. | 你知道么 罗宾 我一直在想 |
[18:51] | Guess it’s kind of nice you’re such a badass. | 你�牌鹄匆猜�好的 |
[18:54] | It’s pretty badass you’re so nice, Ted. | 你好起来也蛮�诺� 泰德 |
[18:59] | Was I supposed to close the basement door? | 我是不是应该把地下室的门关上 |
[19:15] | God, this feels so right! | 天啊 感觉太好了 |
[19:17] | We’re so great together. | 咱俩太登对了 |
[19:18] | I want to spend every minute of every day with you. | 我想在你身边而且寸步不离 |
[19:21] | I never let you out of my sight for one second. | 我要时刻监视着你 |
[19:23] | Not one second, not one second. I don’t! | 连一秒也不要让你离开我的世界 |
[19:24] | Oh, God! | 噢 天啊 |
[19:27] | My last lover was not like this. | 我的上一个可没这么好 |
[19:28] | He was the worst! | 他最烂了 |
[19:29] | Do you know, he didn’t even come to my cat’s bris. | 你知道么 他都不来参加我猫猫的割礼 |
[19:32] | I mean, what? | 我说 什么 |
[19:34] | Well, we showed him. | 所以我就让他亲身体验了下 |
[19:35] | Yes, we did. | 没错 我们真这么干了 |
[19:37] | Let’s just say, the punishment fit the crime. | 可以这么说 我们量刑得当 |
[19:40] | I can’t wait to tell everybody | 我都迫不及待要告诉所有的人 |
[19:41] | that we’re boyfriend and girlfriend! | 我们俩是一对儿了 |
[19:43] | Let’s do it tonight. | 今晚就宣布吧 |
[19:44] | No, it’s Lily and Marshall’s party. | 算了 这是莉莉和马修的派对 |
[19:45] | We’ll wait. | 再等等吧 |
[19:47] | We can do it at Mittens and Mr. Pepper’s wedding. | 我们等到羊肉小姐和呼叫先生的婚礼上再说吧 |
[19:50] | Or maybe something… | 或者 |