| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Don, you have got to get over this. | 大唐 别再纠结了 |
| [00:04] | I’m not buying you a Cinnabon | 我不会每次去见会计师时 |
| [00:06] | every time we go see our accountant. | 就给你买肉桂卷 |
| [00:10] | It’s right downstairs. | 连锁店就在楼下 |
| [00:11] | I could smell it the whole meeting. | 开会时我一直可以闻到 |
| [00:13] | Now I’m just sitting here eating an orange, like a hippie. | 现在我却坐在这里吃橙子 像嬉皮士一样 |
| [00:17] | Hey, babe. | 亲爱的 |
| [00:18] | – Hi, Don. – Hi. Oh, hey, honey. | -唐 -亲爱的 |
| [00:20] | – I’ve got some good news for you. – Yeah? | -我有好消息告诉你 -是吗 |
| [00:22] | You know that, uh, fundraiser at my hospital | 你还记得这周末我们要去参加的 |
| [00:24] | that we’re going to this weekend? | 医院筹款会吧 |
| [00:25] | Oh, yeah, yeah. That party. | 对 那个派对 |
| [00:28] | Where’d that cough come from? | 怎么会咳嗽的 |
| [00:32] | Whoa. I hope it’s not contagious, | 希望不是传染性的 |
| [00:34] | ’cause I really am looking forward to putting on a suit | 因为我真的很期待穿上礼服 |
| [00:37] | and talking to a bunch of strangers. | 和一帮陌生人交谈 |
| [00:41] | That does sound like a pretty bad fake cough. | 听起来真是很严重的假咳嗽 |
| [00:44] | Should I call a fake ambulance | 我要叫假救护车 |
| [00:45] | and have some fake doctors take a look at you? | 让假医生来看看你吗 |
| [00:49] | You think I would fake being sick to get out | 你觉得我会装病不去 |
| [00:51] | of going to your fundraiser? | 你的筹款会吗 |
| [00:52] | I am so offended. I… | 我太生气了 我… |
| [00:54] | I don’t think I can go to the fundraiser anymore. | 我不想再去筹款会了 |
| [00:58] | You’re cute. Are you done? | 你真可爱 演完了吗 |
| [00:59] | – Yeah, I’m done. – Okay. | -完了 -好 |
| [01:01] | The good news I was gonna tell you is you don’t have to go. | 我要跟你说的好消息是 你不用去了 |
| [01:10] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [01:11] | Okay, | 好的 |
| [01:12] | when you say I don’t have to go, | 你说我不用去了 |
| [01:13] | do you mean I really don’t have to go | 是说我真的不用去了 |
| [01:17] | or I don’t have to go | 还是说我不用去了 |
| [01:18] | but I should go, | 但我应该去 |
| [01:20] | unless I want to hear about this a month later | 除非我想在一个月后完全无关的吵架中 |
| [01:22] | in some completely unrelated argument? | 听到你提起这事 |
| [01:24] | You know what? I’m going. | 知道吗 我去定了 |
| [01:26] | No, you really don’t have to go. Marcy said she’d go with me. | 不 你真的不用去了 玛茜说和我一起去 |
| [01:29] | Don’t take my wife. | 别带我老婆去 |
| [01:33] | You should make Adam go. | 你应该让亚当去 |
| [01:36] | What are you doing? | 你在做什么 |
| [01:38] | I’ll tell you what I’m not doing: | 我告诉你我没在做什么 |
| [01:40] | eating a Cinnabon. | 吃肉桂卷 |
| [01:42] | My God, every week with this guy. | 老天 每周都这样 |
| [01:43] | Why don’t you just go get one yourself? | 你为什么不自己去买 |
| [01:45] | He says it tastes better when I buy it. | 他说我买的更好吃 |
| [01:49] | Okay, but, seriously, babe, you are off the hook for the party. | 说真的 亲爱的 你不用去了 |
| [01:52] | Marcy will keep me company. And, plus, all my work friends | 玛茜会一直陪着我 而且 |
| [01:54] | from the lab will be there. You know, Amy, Sarah, and Bob. | 实验室的同事都会去 艾米 莎拉 鲍勃 |
| [01:58] | Oh. That sounds great. Uh, who was that last one? | 听起来真不错 最后一个是谁 |
| [02:00] | I didn’t catch her name. | 我没听清她的名字 |
| [02:03] | Bob. He’s a he. | 鲍勃 是个男的 |
| [02:04] | We watch the same cooking shows. | 我们看同样的厨艺节目 |
| [02:06] | Oh, and if I get behind on an episode, | 如果我漏了一集 |
| [02:08] | he puts me in coffee jail. | 他就把我关在咖啡监狱 |
| [02:13] | And that means I can’t have any coffee until I catch up. | 就是说我没看之前不能喝咖啡 |
| [02:15] | Ooh. Yeah. | 好棒 |
| [02:18] | Everyone at work thinks it’s hilarious. | 同事们都觉得很好笑 |
| [02:20] | He sounds like a great guy. | 听起来真是个不错的人 |
| [02:25] | You have come a long way. | 你成长不少嘛 |
| [02:27] | You know, there was a time that you would’ve been very jealous | 以前如果我有男同事朋友的话 |
| [02:29] | that I had a male work friend. | 你会嫉妒死的 |
| [02:30] | Oh. No. Not anymore. | 不 不会再这样了 |
| [02:33] | No, I left my jealous days behind | 不 我把嫉妒和牛仔短裤 |
| [02:34] | with my jean shorts and my mullet. | 以及鸡冠头一起留在过去了 |
| [02:37] | I am a modern man now. | 现在我是个摩登男人 |
| [02:41] | Yep. That’s right. | 是 没错 |
| [02:44] | Don, you want to help me carry this out to my truck? | 唐 帮我把这个拿到卡车上好吗 |
| [02:52] | I don’t know if you noticed, | 我不知道你发现没 |
| [02:53] | but it doesn’t really take two guys to carry this. | 但拿这个真心用不上两个男人 |
| [02:56] | I don’t like this Bob guy one bit. | 我一点也不喜欢这个鲍勃 |
| [02:58] | First of all, his name’s Bob. | 首先 他叫鲍勃 |
| [03:00] | It’s the same backwards as it is forwards. | 正着写倒着写都是BOB |
| [03:03] | Y-You can’t trust somebody like that. | 你不能相信这样的人 |
| [03:06] | You mean like Mom? | 妈妈的拼写MOM也是如此 |
| [03:07] | Exactly. | 正是 |
| [03:10] | Who cares if some guy likes Andi’s TV shows? | 谁会在意有个男的和安迪看同样的电视节目 |
| [03:13] | I do. ‘Cause it’s a move, man. | 我在意 这是招数 |
| [03:16] | I used the same one on Andi when we were dating. | 以前我和安迪约会时 我也是这样做的 |
| [03:18] | “You love Ally McBeal? | 你爱《甜心俏佳人》吗 |
| [03:20] | “I love Ally McBeal. | 我也爱《甜心俏佳人》 |
| [03:21] | Let’s take off our pants!” | 咱们脱掉裤子吧 |
| [03:24] | I think if I tried that move on Marcy, | 我想如果我对玛茜用这招 |
| [03:26] | I’d just end up washing her pants. | 结局会是帮她洗裤子 |
| [03:28] | Here’s the problem, | 问题是 |
| [03:30] | Andi was home with the kids for a long time. | 安迪在家带孩子太久了 |
| [03:32] | Now she’s back at work. I mean, | 现在她回去工作了 我意思是 |
| [03:34] | you put that honey out there, bears are gonna show up. | 把这样的蜂蜜放出去 不招熊才怪 |
| [03:37] | I got an idea– just don’t be jealous. | 我有个主意 不要吃醋 |
| [03:40] | I can’t help it. Yes, I am sophisticated on the outside, okay? | 我忍不住 没错 我外表成熟稳重 |
| [03:44] | But on the inside, I’m an animal, just like you. | 但内心我是野兽 和你一样 |
| [03:48] | We’re a couple of wild stallions. | 我们是两匹野生的种马 |
| [03:50] | Okay, then be jealous | 那就吃醋 |
| [03:51] | and just tell Andi you don’t want her hanging out with that guy. | 跟安迪说你不想她和那个男的有来往 |
| [03:54] | I can’t do that either. | 我也不能这样做 |
| [03:55] | She hates when I get jealous. | 她讨厌我吃醋 |
| [03:57] | Remember when we were dating and that guy in the bar | 还记得我们约会时 酒吧那个男的 |
| [03:59] | put his arm around her? | 把手搭在她肩上吗 |
| [04:00] | Yeah. You put him in the trash can. | 记得 你把他扔进了垃圾箱 |
| [04:02] | Upside-down. | 头朝下 |
| [04:05] | I’d seen that in cartoons but never real life. | 卡通片里我见过 现实生活头一遭 |
| [04:08] | I actually got the idea from a cartoon. | 其实我是跟卡通片里学的 |
| [04:10] | But she was so mad, she broke up with me. | 但她非常生气 和我分手了 |
| [04:13] | So when we got back together, | 所以我们复合后 |
| [04:14] | I promised I was done being jealous. | 我发誓不会再吃醋 |
| [04:16] | I’m not done. I’m livin’ a lie, Don. | 我会的 我活在谎言里 唐 |
| [04:20] | Hey, honey, um, how do you feel about a kale salad for dinner? | 亲爱的 晚餐吃甘蓝沙拉怎么样 |
| [04:23] | You know I love kale. | 你知道我爱甘蓝 |
| [04:25] | Huh? I am a modern man who loves his kale. | 我是爱着甘蓝的摩登男人 |
| [04:30] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [04:32] | Now I got to choke down another bowl of rabbit food. | 现在我还得又咽下一碗兔子食 |
| [04:36] | What happened to you, man? | 你这是怎么了 |
| [04:37] | Look, do me a favor, if you see me getting jealous, | 帮我个忙 如果你看到我吃醋了 |
| [04:40] | you got to do something to stop me. | 你得做点什么阻止我 |
| [04:42] | – Can I get physical? – Yes. Usual rules: | -可以揍你吗 -可以 规矩和平时一样 |
| [04:44] | above the waist and– I can’t believe I have to say this– | 腰部以上 真不敢相信我要这样说 |
| [04:46] | no biting. | 不准咬人 |
| [04:48] | A brother waits a lifetime for something like this. | 兄弟我这辈子就等这机会呢 |
| [04:50] | Okay. Good. Yeah. | 好的 说定了 |
| [05:03] | Thanks for meeting me, Marcy. | 谢谢你来见我 玛茜 |
| [05:05] | I love visiting you at the hospital. | 我特别喜欢来医院看你 |
| [05:06] | We haven’t had lunch since you went back to work. | 自从你回医院工作 我们就没一起吃过午饭 |
| [05:08] | In the future, is it okay if I bring wine? | 下次我能不能带红酒来 |
| [05:12] | Well, you can’t bring a bottle. But if you bring a thermos, | 不能带一瓶过来 不过拿个保温杯 |
| [05:13] | whatever’s in it’s your business. Oh. | 也没人管里面装的什么 |
| [05:16] | So it’s church rules. | 跟在教堂一样 |
| [05:18] | Sure. | 好吧 |
| [05:20] | Hey, um, I wanted to run something by you. | 我有件事想问问你的意见 |
| [05:24] | Yesterday, I told Adam that I had a guy friend at work, | 昨天 我跟亚当说我在公司交了个男性朋友 |
| [05:27] | Bob, and he seemed fine with it. | 叫鲍勃 可他完全不介意 |
| [05:29] | What a jerk! | 真混蛋 |
| [05:30] | I know! | 是啊 |
| [05:32] | I mean, at first, I was… I was proud of him, | 其实一开始 我还挺欣慰的 |
| [05:34] | but then I started thinking, why is he so fine with it? | 可后来我就觉得 他怎么能这么冷静呢 |
| [05:37] | No, no. This is totally unacceptable. | 不 这种行为完全不可饶恕 |
| [05:39] | You deserve a little jealousy, okay? | 你这么有魅力 他应该吃醋 |
| [05:41] | If I was your husband, Bob would be in a suitcase | 我要是你老公 就把这个鲍勃打包 |
| [05:43] | at the bottom of a river. | 直接扔进河里 |
| [05:45] | Aw. That’s sweet, Marcy. | 矮油 你好贴心 玛茜 |
| [05:49] | I don’t know. Maybe it’s normal. | 我也说不好 也许这样才正常 |
| [05:50] | I mean, Adam and I have been married for 15 years. | 毕竟我跟亚当结婚已经十五年了 |
| [05:53] | And the other night, we… we made, um, | 有一天晚上 我们试了下… |
| [05:56] | you know, a date to fool around, and we both fell asleep. | 假装约会来玩 结果我俩都睡着了 |
| [05:59] | Oh. Yeah. That’s the first time that’s ever happened. | 真的 以前从来没这样过 |
| [06:02] | It wasn’t during, was it? | 不是中途睡着的吧 |
| [06:03] | ‘Cause if Don mistimes his blood pressure pill, | 有时候老唐的降压药吃错时间 |
| [06:05] | I’m not crawling out from under that until the morning. | 我得被压着睡一晚上 早上才能爬出来 |
| [06:09] | No, it wasn’t quite like that. | 不 不是你想的那样 |
| [06:12] | I don’t know. Maybe I should just talk to Adam about it. | 我也不知道 也许我应该直接跟亚当说 |
| [06:14] | And, what, get pity jealousy? | 怎么 你想让他吃醋来可怜你吗 |
| [06:16] | Is that what you want? | 你要他可怜你吗 |
| [06:18] | Oh, you know what, I want the real thing. | 我不要可怜 我要他真的吃醋 |
| [06:20] | Well, if you want to mess with a man’s head, | 你要是想跟男人玩心思和手段 |
| [06:22] | you are having lunch with the right person. | 今天这顿午饭算是吃对了 |
| [06:24] | Okay, here’s what you do: | 我告诉你该怎么做 |
| [06:26] | you tell him that Bob is texting you. | 你跟他说鲍勃经常给你发短信 |
| [06:28] | That’ll wake Adam up. | 绝对见效 |
| [06:30] | But Bob’s my boss. He doesn’t text me. | 可鲍勃是我上司 不会给我发短信的 |
| [06:32] | You know who doesn’t know that? Adam. | 你知道谁不知道这一点吗 亚当 |
| [06:35] | Hey, Adam, I just got the funniest text from Bob. | 亚当 鲍勃给我发了条特别搞笑的短信 |
| [06:41] | Damn. | 妈的 |
| [06:45] | Your texts are too much, Bob. | 这几条短信也太逗了吧 鲍勃 |
| [06:48] | Aw, come on. | 真是够了 |
| [06:51] | Hey, uh, careful you don’t shock yourself, | 小心点别电着自己 |
| [06:52] | there’s a bare spot on that cord. | 线上有段地方没有胶皮 |
| [06:57] | I touched it. | 我摸了 |
| [06:58] | I was gonna fix it, | 我本来想修好的 |
| [06:59] | but I knew you were gonna do that. | 但是我知道你肯定会碰 |
| [07:01] | Hold on, my heart stopped beating. | 等下 我心脏停跳了 |
| [07:05] | There it goes. Okay, we’re back. | 又开始跳了 好的没问题了 |
| [07:07] | Yeah, hey, you didn’t tell Marcy | 对了 我们之前聊过的事 |
| [07:08] | what we talked about, did you? | 你没告诉玛茜吧 |
| [07:10] | About Andi and that guy at work? | 就安迪和那个男同事的事 |
| [07:11] | Oh, don’t tell me it’s a secret. | 你别说这事要保密 |
| [07:12] | I cannot keep a secret from Marcy. | 因为我没办法对玛茜保密 |
| [07:14] | She senses it, | 她总能感觉到 |
| [07:15] | like an old sailor senses a storm. | 就跟久经沙场的老将军一样 |
| [07:17] | But you lie to her all the time. | 你不是总对她撒谎吗 |
| [07:18] | And she catches me all the time. | 但是每次都被她识破 |
| [07:20] | Well, that’s not true. | 也不是每次 |
| [07:21] | She still doesn’t know about | 她不是还不知道 |
| [07:22] | our secret fishing boat up at the lake. | 我们湖边那艘钓鱼船吗 |
| [07:24] | Both our wives are in the dark on that one. | 我们俩的老婆都不知道这事 |
| [07:25] | Well, I was only able to keep that a secret | 我之所以能保守住那个秘密 |
| [07:27] | because I never paid for my half of the boat. | 是因为那艘船我根本就没出钱 |
| [07:29] | Not my boat, not my secret. | 不是我买的 就不算我的秘密 |
| [07:31] | See how I did that? | 发现我的秘诀了吗 |
| [07:33] | Hmm, yeah, someone should study your brain. | 真该让人研究下你脑子怎么运转的 |
| [07:35] | Okay, just keep your mouth shut. | 反正你管好嘴就行了 |
| [07:37] | Hey, babe, Huh? | 宝贝 |
| [07:38] | dinner’s gonna be ready soon. | 晚餐马上就做好了 |
| [07:41] | I’m sorry I’m laughing. I just– | 抱歉我总忍不住要笑 |
| [07:42] | I got the funniest text from Bob. | 鲍勃给我发了一条特别逗的短信 |
| [07:46] | You know, I-it’s actually weird that he’s funny, | 真搞不懂他怎么能这么搞笑 |
| [07:48] | because, I mean, you wouldn’t think that | 谁能想到呢 |
| [07:50] | someone that does triathlons | 一个做铁人三项的人 |
| [07:51] | would have a sense of humor. | 居然这么有幽默感 |
| [07:53] | Wow, he runs, he bikes, he swims. | 他会长跑 会骑自行车 还会游泳 |
| [07:56] | I hope the sharks don’t get him. | 真希望他别被鲨鱼吃了 |
| [07:59] | You know, you should hear | 你真应该听他讲一讲 |
| [08:00] | his stories about trying to find bicycle pants | 他有一次找自行车裤找了很久 |
| [08:02] | that are big enough to fit his muscular thighs– | 因为他大腿肌肉太粗 一般裤子穿不上 |
| [08:04] | I mean, they’re hilarious. | 简直太好笑了 |
| [08:07] | And touching. | 而且很感人 |
| [08:10] | Okay… | 够了 |
| [08:15] | Oh, what happened there? | 刚才发生了什么 |
| [08:17] | You seem mad. | 你好像很生气 |
| [08:19] | N-no. No, no. No, Don | 没有 就是老唐 |
| [08:22] | accidentally shocked me… | 他不小心电到了我 |
| [08:23] | too much. | 电力很足 |
| [08:26] | Oh, okay, well, | 那好吧 |
| [08:28] | I guess I’ll just go finish dinner. | 那我继续去做晚餐了 |
| [08:29] | – Yeah. – Yeah. | -好的 -好 |
| [08:30] | Pound that chicken flat. | 看我扁死那坨鸡肉 |
| [08:33] | Did you hear what she said? | 你听见她刚才说什么了吗 |
| [08:35] | Bob and his giant thighs are texting her now. | 鲍勃和他粗壮的大腿在给她发短信 |
| [08:38] | I’m starting to root for Bob, | 我有点想支持鲍勃了 |
| [08:40] | he sounds like a winner. | 他真的很拼 |
| [08:42] | I got no reaction out of Adam! | 亚当完全没反应 |
| [08:46] | I mean, I did everything short of | 我就差直接跟他说 |
| [08:47] | telling him that Bob and I were slow dancing | 我跟鲍勃在食堂里 |
| [08:49] | in the cafeteria. | 相拥跳慢舞了 |
| [08:52] | Well, maybe you just have to accept the fact | 好吧 不如你就接受现实吧 |
| [08:54] | that things are different now. | 毕竟今时不同往日 |
| [08:56] | Marcy, | 玛茜 |
| [08:58] | I did not call you to get a levelheaded | 我打给你不是为了听你 |
| [09:01] | and fair assessment of the situation. | 对现状进行一个客观评定 |
| [09:03] | You’re right, my bad. | 你说得对 我错了 |
| [09:05] | Okay, maybe I can get some intel from Don, | 我回头套套老唐的话 |
| [09:07] | but in the meantime, | 不过你呢 |
| [09:08] | you-you got to kick it up a notch. | 你再下点猛药吧 |
| [09:10] | It’s like with dogs, | 就跟训狗一样 |
| [09:11] | okay? You can’t just put the food out | 懂吗 不能把食物直接扔出来 |
| [09:13] | and expect that they’ll find it. | 让他们去找 |
| [09:14] | You got to shake the bowl. | 你还得摇一摇狗粮碗 |
| [09:17] | Oh, I’m gonna shake my bowl. | 好 我就使劲摇一摇碗 |
| [09:20] | Wait, am I the food or the bowl? | 等等 那我算是食物还是食盆呢 |
| [09:23] | Well, I’m not the dog, am I? | 我不是那条狗吧 |
| [09:27] | This guy Bob is definitely flirting with Andi now. | 那个鲍勃现在肯定在跟安迪打情骂俏 |
| [09:30] | Well, are you flirting with her? | 那你会跟她调情吗 |
| [09:31] | Yeah, | 会吧 |
| [09:32] | sometimes I walk around with my robe open. | 有的时候我会敞开浴袍走来走去 |
| [09:35] | That’s not flirting, that’s just sloppy. | 那不叫调情 那叫邋遢 |
| [09:38] | You need to get back in the game. | 你需要重振雄风 |
| [09:39] | Hey, text her a sexy picture. | 要不你给她发一张你的艳照 |
| [09:42] | Really? | 不是吧 |
| [09:43] | Yeah, it’s called sexting. | 对啊 这叫短信调情 |
| [09:45] | What do you know about sexting? | 你怎么知道短信调情 |
| [09:47] | I like to dip my toe in popular culture. | 我喜欢尝试一些新鲜的东西 |
| [09:50] | Actually, | 话说回来 |
| [09:51] | a picture’s not a bad idea. | 发艳照也不错 |
| [09:53] | I think getting shocked by that cord | 我看你被电线电了一下 |
| [09:54] | might have fired a neuron or two up in your attic. | 脑袋更灵光了 |
| [09:57] | Look, all you need to do is remind her | 你要做的就是让她知道 |
| [09:59] | that she’s got this slightly faded stud | 她还有个稍微有点失色的猛男 |
| [10:00] | waiting for her at home. | 在家里等着她 |
| [10:03] | Well, if I’m faded, | 如果我都失色了 |
| [10:03] | then what the hell are you? | 那你又如何呢 |
| [10:05] | I do all right. | 我还不错 |
| [10:11] | This is stupid, I feel ridiculous. | 这太傻了 我觉得太荒唐了 |
| [10:13] | I could tell. I’m not feeling the sexy. | 看出来了 因为我没感受到你的性感气息 |
| [10:16] | Look, I’m gonna give you one smoldering look, | 我现在就为你展示我最火辣的一面 |
| [10:18] | because I know that works for me. | 我都会被自己吸引 |
| [10:20] | And you’re gonna take a picture on my phone, | 你现在就拿我的手机拍下来 |
| [10:21] | and then we are never gonna speak of this again. | 然后再也不要提起这件事 |
| [10:23] | You ready? | 准备好了吗 |
| [10:33] | Okay. Actually, that’s not bad. Oh. | 好了 其实也还不错 |
| [10:36] | Okay, I’m gonna send it. | 我现在就发送 |
| [10:37] | And… oops. | 糟糕 |
| [10:40] | – Who’s Alicia? – What? | -艾丽西娅是谁 -什么 |
| [10:42] | I accidentally sent it to someone named Alicia Rodriguez. | 我一不小心发给了艾丽西娅·罗德里格兹 |
| [10:45] | That’s Emme’s kindergarten teacher. | 那是艾米的幼儿园老师 |
| [10:47] | Her name is right next to Andi’s on your phone. | 在你通讯录里她和安迪的名字是挨着的 |
| [10:49] | These fat fingers, I’m telling you. | 都怪我这胖手指 |
| [10:51] | That picture’s gonna go around the whole school. | 那张照片肯定会在学校疯传的 |
| [10:53] | I can fix it, I can fix it. | 我有办法 我有办法 |
| [10:54] | Hold on… Oops. | 等等 糟糕 |
| [10:56] | Oops, again? | 又糟糕 |
| [10:58] | I was texting to say sorry, | 我本来想发一个抱歉 |
| [10:59] | and it autocorrected to salami. | 结果自动更正为了”爆你” |
| [11:01] | Give me that. | 拿给我 |
| [11:09] | Okay, kids. Let’s move it along. | 孩子们 行动起来 |
| [11:10] | We’re wheels up in five minutes. | 我们5分钟后就要干正事了 |
| [11:14] | Sorry my shoes are so loud. | 抱歉我的鞋子声音太大了 |
| [11:16] | High heels. | 高跟鞋嘛 |
| [11:19] | You never wear high heels to work. | 你从来不穿高跟鞋去上班的啊 |
| [11:21] | Well, I dressed up. | 我打扮了一下 |
| [11:22] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [11:24] | Well, it’s the finale of the cooking show | 我和鲍勃一起看的厨艺节目 |
| [11:26] | that Bob and I watch, | 演到最终集了 |
| [11:27] | so he’s taking me out for a, you know, | 所以他想带我 |
| [11:29] | a special lunch to celebrate. | 去吃一顿特别的午餐来庆祝 |
| [11:32] | Just the two of us. | 就我们俩 |
| [11:40] | Got to love that Bob. | 我看那个鲍勃还挺好的 |
| [11:41] | – Great. – Great. | -太好了 -太好了 |
| [11:50] | Oh. Uh, I’m sorry, buddy. | 抱歉 哥们儿 |
| [11:53] | Let me clean you up a little bit. | 让我给你擦擦 |
| [12:01] | Okay, turn around. | 好了 转过去 |
| [12:02] | Let’s just go, uh, up. | 走吧 上楼去 |
| [12:06] | So, um, | 对了 |
| [12:08] | has Adam ever said anything to you | 亚当有没有跟你说过 |
| [12:09] | about Andi’s friend, Bob? | 安迪的一个的朋友 叫鲍勃 |
| [12:12] | Let me think. | 让我想一想 |
| [12:13] | Are you saying “Bob” Or “Rob”? | 你是说”鲍勃”还是”罗布” |
| [12:16] | – Bob. B-O-B. – Todd? | -鲍勃 -托德吗 |
| [12:20] | Are you trying to hide something from me? | 你是想忽悠我什么的吗 |
| [12:22] | No. And you’re not gonna get the secret out of me. | 没有 而且你也别想从我这儿套出点什么 |
| [12:24] | I’m like a rock. | 我稳如泰山 |
| [12:25] | So there is a secret. | 所以你的确有个小秘密 |
| [12:28] | Okay, I see what I did there. | 好吧 我上当了 |
| [12:29] | Okay. Spill it, Don. | 好了 老实交代吧 老唐 |
| [12:32] | Fine. You want the secret? | 好吧 你想知道这个秘密吗 |
| [12:33] | Adam’s gonna kill me, but okay. | 亚当一定会杀了我的 算了没事 |
| [12:37] | We have a secret fishing boat | 我们悄悄买了一条渔船 |
| [12:38] | we never told you about. | 从来没跟你说过 |
| [12:41] | You want to know my secret? | 你知道我的秘密是什么吗 |
| [12:42] | I’ve known about that boat for six months. | 我半年前就知道那条渔船了 |
| [12:46] | Wow, no keeping anything from you. | 看来你对我无所不知啊 |
| [12:48] | So, | 所以呢 |
| [12:49] | nothing about Bob? | 没有什么关于鲍勃的事要汇报吗 |
| [12:51] | Rod? | 罗德吗 |
| [12:52] | Don! | 老唐 |
| [12:54] | Well, I’m Don. | 我就是老唐 |
| [12:58] | – Bye, Dad. – Bye, Dad. | -爸爸再见 -爸爸再见 |
| [12:59] | – Bye, Dad. – Bye-bye, bye. | -爸爸再见 -再见 |
| [13:00] | Have a good day. All right, bye. | 玩得开心 再见 |
| [13:04] | Good morning, Burns. | 早上好啊 猛男 |
| [13:07] | Good morning, Mrs. Rodriguez. | 早上好 罗德里格兹老师 |
| [13:14] | I’m glad everyone enjoyed the motorcycle picture. | 你们喜欢那张摩托车照片就好 |
| [13:17] | Yeah, we had a little caption contest. | 我们还为那张照片取了个标题 |
| [13:19] | Mine was, “Born to be wild-ly embarrassed.” | 我取的是 “与生俱来之狂野的尴尬” |
| [13:23] | Okay, that picture was supposed to be for my wife, | 好了 那张照片本来是要发给我老婆的 |
| [13:25] | but mistakes were made. | 但是发错了 |
| [13:28] | Why are you taking pictures of yourself on a motorcycle? | 那你为什么要照一张骑摩托车的照片 |
| [13:31] | Besides to delight me. | 除了让我发笑以外 |
| [13:33] | I’m not talking to you about it. | 我不跟你说这个了 |
| [13:35] | From now on, I’m not talking to anyone about it, | 从现在起 我不跟任何人讨论这件事 |
| [13:36] | except Andi, which is what I should have done | 除了安迪 当然我本来第一时间 |
| [13:38] | in the first place. | 就该和她谈一谈 |
| [13:39] | So, I’m gonna go find her at work | 所以我要去她上班的地方找她 |
| [13:40] | and settle this whole thing. | 把这件事情解决了 |
| [13:41] | All right, and I’m see how much it costs | 好了 我要去看看租个广告牌发照片 |
| [13:43] | to rent a billboard. | 要花多少钱 |
| [13:47] | Okay, Bob, I finished processing these samples | 鲍勃 我已经处理完了这些样本 |
| [13:49] | and I’m gonna go grab a cup of coffee. | 现在准备去喝杯咖啡 |
| [13:51] | You want some? | 你要喝一杯吗 |
| [13:53] | oxygen potassium. | 氧和钾 |
| [13:55] | – What? – From the periodic table. | -什么 -元素周期表里面 |
| [13:57] | They’re “O” And “K.” | 氧是”O” 钾是”K” |
| [13:59] | That’s a good one, bob. | 不错啊 鲍勃 |
| [14:01] | Oxygen… | 氧… |
| [14:08] | You must be Bob. | 你就是鲍勃吧 |
| [14:09] | Yeah, that’s right. | 没错 我就是 |
| [14:18] | Let’s get a look at those muscular thighs. | 给我看看你这强壮的大腿 |
| [14:23] | They’re not so great. You want to see my thighs? | 也不怎么样嘛 你想看看我的大腿吗 |
| [14:24] | Uh, no. | 不用了 |
| [14:27] | Let’s put our thighs against each other. | 我们把大腿放一起吧 |
| [14:28] | Thigh to thigh. Come on, Bob, let’s do this. | 腿贴腿 来吧 鲍勃 来呀 |
| [14:31] | Who are you? | 你是谁啊 |
| [14:32] | I’m Andi’s husband, now hold still. | 我是安迪她老公 你站着别动 |
| [14:33] | No, you first. | 你先别动 |
| [14:36] | Okay, listen, pal. I don’t like you | 听着 哥们 我不喜欢 |
| [14:38] | watching TV shows with my wife. | 你和我老婆一起看电视节目 |
| [14:42] | Okay? I don’t like you | 我不喜欢 |
| [14:43] | having special lunches with her, | 你和她共享午餐 |
| [14:46] | or making her wear high heels. | 或是让她穿高跟鞋 |
| [14:48] | I think there’s been a misunderstanding. | 我觉得你误会了 |
| [14:50] | Oh, look at that, you’re right next to a big trash can. | 看啊 你正好站在一个大垃圾桶旁边 |
| [14:52] | You ever watch cartoons? | 你看过动画吗 |
| [14:56] | Adam? W-What are you doing here? | 亚当 你在这里做什么 |
| [14:58] | I’m just letting this guy know | 我在教训这家伙 |
| [14:59] | it’s not okay to text another man’s wife. | 让他知道和别人的老婆发短信是不对的 |
| [15:01] | I never texted her. | 我从来没和她发过短信啊 |
| [15:03] | Oh, you just keep walking into problems, Bob. | 鲍勃 你真是不断地自找麻烦啊 |
| [15:06] | Andi told me about the texts. | 安迪已经告诉过我短信的事了 |
| [15:08] | Right, Andi? Andi, I’m right, right? | 是不是 安迪 安迪 是吧 |
| [15:10] | Andi, am I right? | 安迪 我说得对吗 |
| [15:13] | Okay, um… | 是这样的 |
| [15:15] | …funny story. | 说起来很好笑 |
| [15:17] | I-I may have mentioned | 我也许提到过 |
| [15:19] | that Bob was texting me… | 鲍勃在和我发短信 |
| [15:21] | …but that was a– | 但是呢 |
| [15:23] | a slight exaggeration | 我也许夸张了一点点 |
| [15:24] | in-in the sense that, um, | 怎么夸张法呢 |
| [15:26] | h-he never did anything like that, ever. | 其实他从来没有给我发过短信 |
| [15:31] | Where’s the funny part to that story? | 哪里好笑了 |
| [15:33] | Oh, well, um, the funny part is, | 好笑的地方就是 |
| [15:35] | he’s my boss, Bob Thompson. | 他是我老板 鲍勃·汤普森 |
| [15:38] | That is funny. | 确实很好笑呢 |
| [15:42] | Well, that is funny. | 真好笑啊 |
| [15:44] | And I hope that one day, | 我希望将来有一天 |
| [15:45] | we’ll can look back on this and laugh. | 我们回想起今天发生的事情就觉得好笑 |
| [15:49] | I’ll do whatever you want. | 我什么都听你的 你说什么就是什么 |
| [15:52] | A-And I also hope that this little misunderstanding | 同时我也希望这个小小的误会 |
| [15:55] | won’t cause a problem with Andi’s job. | 不会给安迪的工作造成任何的困扰 |
| [15:57] | No, no, her– her job is safe. | 不会不会 她的工作很安全 |
| [16:00] | Uh, we may tighten up our | 我们可能要严格执行 |
| [16:01] | “No spouses at work” Policy. | “工作场所禁止配偶进入”政策了 |
| [16:10] | Andi, what are you doing to me? | 安迪 你这是在干什么 |
| [16:12] | I don’t know. | 我也不知道 |
| [16:15] | Okay, w-when I mentioned that I had a guy friend at work, | 我给你说我有个工作上的男性朋友的时候 |
| [16:19] | you didn’t seem to care. | 你好像并不怎么关心 |
| [16:20] | Didn’t care? | 不关心 |
| [16:22] | Well, I cared a lot! | 我太关心了好吗 |
| [16:23] | I was going crazy! | 我都快要疯掉了 |
| [16:25] | Well, why didn’t you say something? | 那你怎么不说点什么呀 |
| [16:27] | Because you hate it when I get jealous. | 因为你最讨厌我吃醋了 |
| [16:29] | Well, I hated it when we were in our 20s | 我讨厌你吃醋是在我们20岁的时候 |
| [16:31] | and guys were hitting on me all the time. | 那时候追我的人多了去了 |
| [16:33] | Guys were hitting on you all the time? | 追你的人多了去了 |
| [16:34] | Who were these guys? Are they tall? | 都是些什么人 高不高 |
| [16:37] | See, that’s what I was looking for. | 这才是我期待的反应嘛 |
| [16:39] | What? | 什么 |
| [16:40] | Well, a little jealousy is nice. | 小小地吃点醋也挺好的 |
| [16:44] | Wha– since when? | 从什么时候开始了 |
| [16:47] | Apparently, the older I get, the more I’m gonna need. | 很显然 我年纪越大 要求的就越多 |
| [16:50] | Good… | 好啊 |
| [16:52] | ’cause I am tired of pretending | 因为我也厌倦了假装 |
| [16:54] | to be someone I’m not. | 掩盖我自己的本性 |
| [16:56] | I’m a jealous man. | 我就是爱吃醋 |
| [16:58] | And I’ll tell you another thing: | 我再给你说件事 |
| [16:59] | I don’t like kale. | 我不喜欢吃甘蓝 |
| [17:00] | I don’t like kale, either. | 我也不喜欢吃甘蓝 |
| [17:02] | Then why are we eating yard clippings? | 那我们干嘛要吃这些碎草 |
| [17:05] | Because we’re supposed to like it. | 因为我们应该要喜欢吃甘蓝 |
| [17:06] | Just like I’m supposed to get my confidence from the inside | 就像我应该要发自内心地自信 |
| [17:08] | and you’re supposed to be so secure in our marriage | 而你应该要对我们的婚姻充满信心 |
| [17:11] | that you don’t care who I’m friends with. | 不管我和谁交朋友都不用担心 |
| [17:14] | That sounds like something they do in France! | 听起来像是法国人干的事情 |
| [17:18] | This is America, damn it. | 这里可是美国 |
| [17:19] | We are jealous, insecure, kale haters. | 我们就是爱吃醋 没有安全感 讨厌甘蓝 |
| [17:25] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [17:27] | I love you, too. | 我也爱你 |
| [17:29] | Oh, by the way, | 顺便说一句 |
| [17:31] | I texted Mrs. Rodriguez a sexy photo of myself. | 我给罗德里格兹老师发了张性感照片 |
| [17:34] | And, uh, the word “Salami.” | 还发了”爆你” |
| [17:35] | So, there might be some fallout from that. | 可能到时候会有些麻烦 |
| [17:38] | But, uh, okay, here we go. | 但是呢 来先抱抱 |
| [17:49] | So, after all of this, | 这件事之后 |
| [17:50] | we have decided to be completely honest with each other. | 我们决定要对对方绝对诚实 |
| [17:53] | That’s right, no more secrets. | 没错 不留任何秘密 |
| [17:55] | I like that, Don. We should do that, too. | 这主意不错 老唐 我们也应该这么做 |
| [17:57] | Hey, I’m way ahead of you, baby. | 我早就想到了 亲爱的 |
| [17:59] | That’s why I told you about Adam’s secret boat. | 所以我才告诉你亚当的秘密小船 |
| [18:05] | Don! | 老唐 |
| [18:07] | W-What boat? | 什么船 |
| [18:08] | You said there’s no secrets. | 你说不留秘密的 |
| [18:10] | I meant no new secrets. | 我的意思是不要有新的秘密 |
| [18:13] | Wait, you bought a boat without telling me? | 等等 你没跟我商量就买了艘船 |
| [18:14] | Ooh, that’s bad. | 有好戏看喽 |
| [18:17] | Oh, yeah? | 是吗 |
| [18:18] | Marcy, Don bought your engagement ring | 玛茜 老唐给你的订婚戒指 |
| [18:20] | from a mortician. | 是在殡仪馆买的 |
| [18:23] | What? | 什么 |
| [18:24] | Oh, that’s worse! | 这个更厉害哦 |
| [18:28] | Hey, the dearly departed didn’t need it anymore. | 去世的人又不需要这个戒指了 |
| [18:30] | It’s not like they cut it off her finger. | 反正戒指又不是从她手指上砍下来的 |
| [18:48] | What’s so funny? | 有什么好笑的吗 |
| [18:49] | Have you looked at your passenger side door lately? | 你最近有看看车子副驾驶的门吗 |
| [18:52] | No, why? | 没有 怎么了 |
| [18:52] | What happened there? | 你自己看看 |
| [18:57] | Don. | 老唐干的好事 |
| [19:03] | I bet that’s payback for the mortician. | 肯定是报复我说了殡仪馆的事 |
| [19:06] | “Honk if you think I’m sexy.” | “如果你觉得我很性感 就按下喇叭” |
| [19:10] | Hey, I didn’t get a single honk! | 但是没有一个人冲我按喇叭 |
| [19:15] | I’m going back out there. | 我开车再出去溜一圈 |