时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:02] | Go go go! | 冲冲冲 |
[00:04] | You see that? We just took the lead. | 你看 我们队领先了 |
[00:06] | Hey, dad. Do you think I can pull off these boots? | 爸 你觉得我穿这双靴子能好看吗 |
[00:08] | Honey, I got 20 bucks right on this game. | 宝贝 这场比赛我押了20元呢 |
[00:10] | I will pull your boots off at halftime, okay? | 中场的时候再帮你脱靴子 乖 |
[00:13] | I don’t know about that new paint color in your bathroom. | 我对你家浴室新换的颜色表示疑虑 |
[00:16] | I know, Joy; it’s way too yellow. | 我知道 高兴 实在太黄了 |
[00:18] | This morning, I thought I was peeing on the sun. | 早上 我以为自己在太阳上尿尿呢 |
[00:21] | It’s so bright, I could see it from my bedroom window. | 它亮到我从我家卧室都能看到 |
[00:26] | Yeah, well, that’s why I asked Adam to repaint it. | 所以我才让亚当重刷 |
[00:29] | He turned a shade of red | 他调了种红色 |
[00:30] | that I think would actually look nice in the bathroom. | 我觉得在厕所里应该很好看 |
[00:34] | Husbands love redoing | 丈夫就喜欢重做那些 |
[00:36] | what they didn’t want to do in the first place. | 一开始不想做的事 |
[00:38] | Yeah, we disagreed, but then we sat down, | 我们产生过分歧 然后坐下 |
[00:41] | had a discussion, and he’s repainting. | 讨论一番 他就决定重刷 |
[00:43] | Yeah. | 是的 |
[00:44] | Made him some nachos to ease the blow. | 给他做点玉米片 舒缓情绪 |
[00:47] | See, the angry part of his brain is smaller than the nacho part. | 要知道 他脑子里玉米片比生气的比重更大 |
[00:51] | All right, I’ll tell you what, I’ll buy you the boots | 行吧 那这样 我可以给你买靴子 |
[00:53] | if you help me repaint the stupid bathroom– | 但你要帮我重新给破厕所刷漆 |
[00:55] | Ooh, nachos. | 哦 玉米片 |
[00:58] | Well, you deserve ’em, honey. | 你应得的 宝贝 |
[00:59] | And the cheese is the color of the bathroom, | 而且奶酪的颜色跟厕所一样 |
[01:01] | so you won’t forget to repaint it. | 也能好好提醒你 别忘了 |
[01:07] | Howdy! | 好啊 |
[01:09] | I’m Baggy Britches, and I have a message. | 我是大裤子 给人带个信儿 |
[01:11] | Are you Kate Burns? | 你是凯特·伯恩斯吗 |
[01:12] | No! No! Say no! Say no! | 不 不 说不是 不是 |
[01:15] | What is wrong with your husband? | 你老公什么毛病 |
[01:16] | Don’t look at his flower. That’s how they get you. | 别看他的花 看了就会把你骗走 |
[01:19] | Adam has a fear of clowns. | 亚当怕小丑 |
[01:21] | It’s not a fear, okay? | 那不叫怕 |
[01:22] | It’s a natural instinct that’s kept me alive thus far. | 是让我活到今天的本能反应 |
[01:26] | Then why are you using your daughter as a human shield? | 那你为什么用你女儿当肉盾 |
[01:29] | Because you’re too far away. | 因为够不到你 |
[01:31] | Murder her; I barely know her. | 杀她 我不认识她 |
[01:34] | ♪ I’ve been sent over here in my baggy pants ♪ | 我穿着大裤子被派来 |
[01:37] | ♪ ‘Cause Danny Phillips wants to ask Kate ♪ | 为丹尼·菲利普斯送信来 |
[01:39] | ♪ To the Spring Formal Dance. ♪ | 邀请凯特把春天舞会来参加 |
[01:42] | Seriously? The Spring Formal? | 真的吗 春天舞会 |
[01:43] | Oh, my God! Mom! | 天啊 妈妈 |
[01:46] | Hey, you want to see some magic? | 想不想看魔术 |
[01:48] | No, no, no! | 不想 不想 不想 |
[01:50] | Get out! Get out! | 出去 出去 |
[01:51] | Get out, get out, get out! | 滚出去 快滚出去 |
[01:55] | That was close. | 太险了 |
[01:58] | Kate, the Spring Formal. That’s huge! | 凯特 春天舞会 很重要的 |
[01:59] | I know. I can’t believe it. | 我知道 真不敢相信 |
[02:01] | He’s still out there. | 他还在外面 |
[02:04] | I’m gonna turn the sprinklers on. | 我去把洒水器打开 |
[02:05] | It’ll wash off his makeup, then he’ll be powerless. | 把他的妆容都冲掉 就没有超能力了 |
[02:10] | I couldn’t be happier for Kate. | 我太为凯特高兴了 |
[02:11] | I mean, hardly any freshman girls | 没有几个一年级的姑娘 |
[02:13] | get asked to the senior dance. | 能被学长邀请参加高年级舞会的 |
[02:14] | Hold on. The guy that asked her is a senior? | 等等 邀请她的男生是个学长 |
[02:18] | All right, don’t get all Adam on this. | 好啦 别用亚当那套来面对 |
[02:21] | I’m Adam. | 我就是亚当 |
[02:23] | That’s the only way I get. | 我只会这一套 |
[02:26] | Look, it doesn’t mean they’re dating. | 又不代表他们在约会 |
[02:27] | It’s just one dance. | 一场舞会而已 |
[02:29] | One dance is enough. | 一场舞会就够了 |
[02:31] | That’s where you do all the laying down things standing up. | 舞会就是把躺下做的事站着做了 |
[02:35] | Yeah, I know. I remember from our wedding night. | 对 我记得我们的新婚夜 |
[02:37] | It was like you had six hands. | 你好像长了六只手 |
[02:40] | Andi, any senior that asks out a freshman | 任何邀请一年级姑娘的学长 |
[02:42] | has something wrong with him. | 都有一些问题 |
[02:44] | Okay, he’s the kind of guy who ends up dressed as a clown, | 他就是那种会沦落到穿着小丑装 |
[02:46] | terrorizing honest citizens. | 吓唬市民的人 |
[02:49] | For all we know, that was him. | 刚才那个人 也许就是他 |
[02:52] | Boy, you get lost in one fun house, it ruins your life. | 天啊 在游乐宫里走丢一次 害了你一辈子 |
[02:57] | Fun house. | 游乐宫 |
[02:59] | Never has a place been more incorrectly named. | 这地方的名字错得不能更离谱了 |
[03:03] | She is not going to that dance, and that’s the end of it. | 她不许去参加那个舞会 对话结束 |
[03:05] | Okay, well, let’s sit down and discuss it. | 那么 我们坐下好好讨论一下 |
[03:10] | And after, we can have nachos. | 之后 我们可以吃玉米片 |
[03:15] | No, no, no, no, no. | 不行 不行 |
[03:17] | No. I’m not going to the chairs with you. | 我才不要跟你坐下 |
[03:19] | Every time we sit down and discuss, I lose. | 每次坐下谈 我都输 |
[03:22] | I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I’d like to. | 我不懂你在说什么 但我想了解 |
[03:25] | Hey, let’s have a seat, | 我们坐下 |
[03:28] | talk it out. | 好好谈谈吧 |
[03:34] | Not this time, sunshine. | 这次不行 我的阳光 |
[03:36] | This time, I’m gonna prep. | 这一次 我要做斗争准备 |
[03:38] | I’m going to the blackboard, drawing some X’s and O’s, | 我去找黑板 画出点圈圈叉叉 |
[03:40] | and getting some plays ready. | 准备好几套战术 |
[03:43] | Yeah, well, that makes sense. Yeah. | 好的 也有道理 |
[03:45] | You want to run any of these plays by me? | 你那些战术用不用我帮你看看 |
[03:47] | Well, for starters, Katie’s– Oh, you’re good. | 首先 凯特的… 你可真厉害 |
[03:52] | I’m onto you now, though. | 我现在盯上你了 |
[03:54] | I’m never sitting down in here again. | 我再也不会坐在这儿了 |
[04:09] | I just don’t think Katie should date a senior. | 我只是觉得凯特不应该跟学长约会 |
[04:12] | But I’m oh for a thousand with Andi | 可每次和安迪坐下讨论的时候 |
[04:13] | when we sit down and have these discussions. | 我最后都会同意她的观点 |
[04:16] | I’m like that team that plays the Harlem Globetrotters. | 我就像在哈林篮球队里打球的人 |
[04:18] | I’m trying to make a point, | 我想得分 |
[04:19] | and she’s running circles around me, bouncing balls off my head. | 而她围着我绕圈圈 把球在我头上扔来扔去 |
[04:23] | Our problem is wives have more stamina than us. | 我们的问题是 老婆们比我们有毅力 |
[04:26] | We’d rather lose than listen. | 我们宁愿输掉 也不想再听了 |
[04:29] | And even if you win a point, they keep coming at you, | 就算你得分了 她们还会继续找你麻烦 |
[04:31] | like waves at the beach. | 像海浪拍上沙滩 |
[04:33] | Blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah. | 废话 废话 废话 |
[04:36] | Mostly my marriage is fifty-fifty, | 我们的婚姻里 大部分时间很平等 |
[04:39] | but when we have a difference of opinion, I lose | 但只要产生异议 我就输了 |
[04:41] | because I go with my gut and Andi goes with logic. | 因为我用意气 安迪用的是逻辑 |
[04:44] | She can make a good argument for any bad idea. | 她可以把任何烂主意讲出花来 |
[04:47] | If you really want to win, I know a trick from the old days. | 如果你真的很想赢 我倒知道一个古老的手段 |
[04:50] | It’s called silent negotiation. | 叫作 静默商讨 |
[04:53] | I’ve heard of that. | 我听说过 |
[04:55] | You let her talk first, but then you don’t say a word. | 你先让她说 然后你一言不发 |
[04:58] | You just stare at her and wait her out. | 盯着她 等她先忍不住 |
[05:00] | She’ll start talking in circles, doubting herself. | 她就会说罗圈话 开始怀疑自己 |
[05:03] | Eventually she’ll break down like a Chinese Rolex. | 最后 她会像山寨劳力士一样分崩离析 |
[05:07] | Like the one you gave me for Christmas? | 跟你送我的圣诞礼物一样 |
[05:08] | I went to see what time it was, | 我刚想看现在几点了 |
[05:09] | and all the numbers just fell to the bottom. | 结果所有数字都掉下去了 |
[05:12] | I told you not to let the sun hit it! | 我说过 不能让太阳照 |
[05:15] | I don’t want Katie to go to the dance, | 我不想让凯特参加舞会 |
[05:16] | but this silent negotiation, that’s never gonna work. | 但这个静默商讨 肯定没用的 |
[05:20] | I’m right about this. | 这件事准没错 |
[05:21] | My grandfather said “I do,” | 我爷爷只说过 我愿意 |
[05:23] | then he didn’t speak to his wife again for 40 years. | 在接下来的四十年中 一言不发 |
[05:26] | He got everything he wanted. | 他过得随心所欲 |
[05:29] | Here, I’ll do it on Don. | 看着 我对大唐用这招 |
[05:31] | 大伙儿好啊 | |
[05:32] | Hey, Donny, | 小唐 |
[05:35] | I need you to take your mother to the fabric store tonight. | 我需要你今晚带着你妈去纺织品商店 |
[05:39] | Sorry, Pop, but we’ve been over this. | 抱歉 老爸 我们谈过这件事了 |
[05:41] | It’s not my responsibility to run Mom around town. | 带老妈在城里转悠 不是我的责任 |
[05:48] | I’m her son, not her husband. I have my own life. | 我是她儿子 不是她丈夫 我有自己的生活 |
[05:56] | Come on, Pop, the fabric store? | 拜托 老爸 纺织品商店吗 |
[06:03] | Although, Mom is getting older. | 不过 妈妈年龄确实越来越大了 |
[06:07] | Fine, I’ll pick her up at 7:00. | 好吧 我七点去接她 |
[06:09] | And that’s how you do that. | 瞧见没 学好了 |
[06:12] | Wow, look at him. | 瞧他啊 |
[06:14] | He’s still trying to figure out what happened, | 还在想到底发生了什么 |
[06:16] | like a bird that flew into a window. | 像一只飞进了窗户的鸟 |
[06:21] | Hello, darling. | 亲爱的 |
[06:23] | I’m ready to | 我准备好了 |
[06:25] | sit down and discuss this whole… | 坐下 好好讨论一下这个 |
[06:29] | …Katie situation. | 凯特的状况 |
[06:32] | Okay. I was born to discuss. | 好的 我天生擅长讨论 |
[06:36] | You should know, I don’t have any nacho stuff. | 你要知道 我没准备玉米片哦 |
[06:39] | I’ll take my chances. | 我试试看吧 |
[06:42] | Ladies first. | 女士优先 |
[06:44] | Okay, here’s how I see it. Okay, Kate is very mature. | 我是这样想的 凯特很成熟 |
[06:47] | I mean, you’ve said that yourself, | 你自己也说过的 |
[06:48] | so you’re kind of arguing against yourself here. | 所以你现在是在打自己的脸 |
[06:55] | And… and the school has chaperones | 而且 学校会有监护人 |
[06:59] | watching the entire time, | 全程监管 |
[07:02] | thus removing any potential for danger. | 因此消除了所有潜在的危险 |
[07:04] | Boom. Game, set, match. | 取得 完全 胜利 |
[07:06] | Hit the showers, kid! Ha! | 洗澡去吧 孩子 |
[07:13] | It’s a school sanctioned event, Adam. | 这是学校准许的活动 亚当 |
[07:15] | I mean, nothing will go wrong. | 不可能出问题的 |
[07:18] | She’s gonna be surrounded by adults all night. | 整晚都是成人在陪着她 |
[07:25] | Except in the car. | 除了在车里 |
[07:28] | Which is where boys get handsy. | 男生在车里就会毛手毛脚 |
[07:32] | And she’s gonna be hanging out with Danny’s friends. | 她还会跟丹尼的朋友们一起玩 |
[07:35] | And older kids sneak alcohol into dances. | 大孩子们还会偷偷带酒去学校舞会 |
[07:38] | You know what? You’re right. She shouldn’t go to this thing. | 你说得对 她不应该参加这种活动 |
[07:40] | It’s a bad idea. | 这个主意太糟糕了 |
[07:44] | So we’ve reached an agreement? | 我们达成共识了吗 |
[07:50] | I guess so, yeah. | 好像是的 |
[08:00] | Well, thanks for hearing me out. | 谢谢你听我说这么多 |
[08:10] | I’ve heard stories of women losing arguments to their husbands; | 我听说过有女人会在讨论中输给丈夫 |
[08:13] | I just never thought it’d happen to someone I knew. | 只是从来没想过是我认识的人 |
[08:16] | What did he say that was so convincing? | 他到底说了什么有说服力的话 |
[08:19] | Well, he made a lot of good points. | 他说的很多都很有道理 |
[08:24] | He said… | 他说 |
[08:25] | No, no, I said that. | 不对 是我说的 |
[08:27] | But he did say that… | 不过他说过 |
[08:29] | No, I said that, too. | 不对 还是我自己说的 |
[08:32] | Wait, come to think of it, he didn’t say anything. | 等等 现在想想 他什么都没说 |
[08:38] | He played the quiet game. | 他玩的是沉默术 |
[08:40] | What? | 什么 |
[08:41] | It’s a trick. | 一个手段 |
[08:42] | That’s how I got engaged. | 我就这么订婚的 |
[08:44] | Rudy just wanted to shack up, so I kept my mouth shut | 鲁迪只想同居 然后我就闭嘴 |
[08:46] | until he came back with a ring, and then a better ring. | 直到他拿着戒指回来找我 又换了更好的戒指 |
[08:50] | So Adam played dirty. | 亚当跟我玩阴的 |
[08:52] | I knew I wasn’t wrong. | 我就知道我没错 |
[08:54] | Kate should go to the dance. | 凯特应该去舞会 |
[08:56] | First of all, you’re never wrong. | 首先 你从来不会错 |
[08:57] | And even if you’re wrong, you’re still more right than him. | 就算你错了 还是比他对 |
[09:00] | Yeah, well, I can play dirty, too. | 好的 我也可以玩阴的 |
[09:03] | Oh-ho-ho, just you watch. | 你瞧好了 |
[09:05] | How do I play dirty? | 我要怎么玩阴的 |
[09:07] | Well, he wanted to make this decision, right? | 是他想做这个决定 对吧 |
[09:09] | I say pile it on, make him pick everything. | 你就加码 所有决定都交给他 |
[09:12] | Like the new color for the bathroom. | 比如厕所的新颜色 |
[09:14] | I can’t let him do that. | 这可不行 |
[09:15] | He’ll just paint a Van Halen logo on the wall. | 他会把范·海伦的标识刷到墙上的 |
[09:17] | It won’t even get that far. Men hate these decisions. | 他撑不到那个时候 男人讨厌做决定 |
[09:20] | What color, how many, thread count. | 什么颜色 要多少 织物针数 |
[09:22] | Thread count. | 织物针数 |
[09:24] | He doesn’t even know what that is. | 他根本不知道那是啥 |
[09:26] | It’ll drive him so crazy, | 他会被逼疯 |
[09:27] | he’ll eventually fold on everything, including Kate. | 最终放弃所有事的决定权 包括凯特 |
[09:31] | And victory will be mine. | 然后我就大获全胜 |
[09:34] | I mean, you know, we’ll be doing the right thing for Kate, | 不对 这样凯特就能得到最好的结果 |
[09:36] | and that’s what’s important. | 这个最重要 |
[09:41] | It was beautiful, Don. I said nothing and she caved. | 太美了 老唐 我一言不发 她直接坍塌 |
[09:44] | I wish I was wearing a body cam, | 真希望我当时随身携带相机 |
[09:46] | ’cause that’s a movie I would watch every year on my birthday. | 这个视频我肯定每年生日都看一遍 |
[09:50] | We should celebrate this win | 为了庆祝这场胜利 |
[09:51] | by going fishing this weekend. | 我们这周末去钓鱼吧 |
[09:53] | Ah, not so fast. | 先别着急 |
[09:55] | That silent negotiation, that’s bad voodoo. | 静默商讨这个手段 属于巫术 |
[09:59] | I spent hours with Mom at that fabric store. | 我跟妈在那家纺织品商店逛了很久 |
[10:01] | Do you know how many kinds of corduroy there are? | 你知道灯芯绒有多少种吗 |
[10:03] | There’s wide wale, pinwale, pincord, needlecord. | 有粗条纹 细棱条 引线 细条绒 |
[10:07] | I’m never gonna be the same. | 对我造成了毁灭性伤害 |
[10:10] | Oh, here comes Katie. Hey, Katie. | 凯特来了 凯特 |
[10:13] | So, the man who won’t let me go to the dance says hey. | 不让我去舞会的人还跟我打招呼 |
[10:16] | Hi, Uncle Don, and nobody else. | 老唐伯伯好 陌生人好 |
[10:19] | Hi, Katie. | 凯特好 |
[10:20] | I like your needlecord pants. | 你的细条绒裤子很好看 |
[10:24] | Thanks, Uncle Don, and nobody else. | 谢谢唐伯伯 还有陌生人 |
[10:28] | You see how mad she is? | 你看见她有多生气了吗 |
[10:30] | That’s how you know I won. | 这就说明我赢了 |
[10:33] | Oh, it’s not over yet. | 现在还没结束 |
[10:34] | When you mess with Mother Nature, | 如果挑战大自然的威力 |
[10:36] | there’s always unintended consequences. | 总会承担相应的后果 |
[10:38] | This is Jurassic Park stuff you’re screwing around with. | 这就像《侏罗纪公园》一样 |
[10:42] | You just don’t understand winning. | 你只是不理解胜利的感觉 |
[10:44] | It’s so unfamiliar, it scares you. | 对你来说太陌生了 所以你害怕 |
[10:47] | Hey, babe. Listen, uh, | 宝贝 是这样 |
[10:49] | Don and I were thinking about going fishing this weekend. | 我和老唐打算周末去钓鱼 |
[10:51] | Actually, I was hoping that you’d go to the paint store | 其实 我想让你去一趟油漆店 |
[10:54] | and choose a new color for the bathroom. | 选一下厕所要刷的新颜色 |
[10:56] | What? Why me? | 什么 为什么我来选 |
[10:58] | Well, you know, you were so right about Kate, | 你也知道 毕竟凯特的事你说得很对 |
[11:01] | I realized you should be making more decisions around here. | 我觉得家里的事应该多让你做主 |
[11:04] | No, I shouldn’t. What? | 不应该 为什么 |
[11:07] | T. Rex is out of the pen. | 霸王龙跑出来了 |
[11:11] | Also, um, look through these brochures | 另外 你再看一下这些宣传册 |
[11:13] | and choose a summer camp for the kids. | 给孩子们选一个夏令营吧 |
[11:16] | But I was gonna watch TV. This stuff is your thing. | 但我打算看电视的 这些是你的事啊 |
[11:20] | Well, now I’m gonna watch TV. It’s my new thing. | 那我去看电视吧 这是我新找的事 |
[11:25] | I almost forgot. | 差点忘了 |
[11:26] | Can you pick us out a new bed skirt? Great, thanks. | 顺便再帮忙选个床裙吧 谢谢啦 |
[11:33] | A bed skirt? | 床裙 |
[11:35] | What the hell is a bed skirt? | 床裙是个什么东西 |
[11:38] | I think we know who wears the bed skirt in this family. | 我们现在知道家里谁穿床裙了 |
[11:47] | Look at all this. I got to choose paint colors, summer camps, | 你看看 我得选油漆颜色 夏令营 |
[11:51] | some made up thing called a bed skirt. | 还得选什么鬼床裙 |
[11:54] | What the hell happened? | 到底发生了什么 |
[11:56] | You messed with nature. | 你挑战了大自然 |
[11:57] | Now you got dinosaurs running all over the island. | 现在你的岛上全是恐龙 |
[12:00] | Yeah, I screwed up the whole balance of our marriage. | 是啊 我打破了我们婚姻的平衡 |
[12:03] | Before this, she made a billion decisions without me. | 在这之前 她独自做了那么多决定 |
[12:06] | And I was happy because I didn’t have to chime in, | 我也很开心 因为我不用插手 |
[12:08] | and she was happy because she got to decide stuff | 她也很开心 因为可以自己决定 |
[12:11] | without some chump chiming in. | 不必被笨蛋插手 |
[12:13] | Amen, brother. | 说得好 兄弟 |
[12:15] | I haven’t chimed in since 1989. | 自从1989年起 我就没再插手了 |
[12:17] | I bought parachute pants. Learned my lesson. | 当时我买了伞裤 吸取了教训 |
[12:21] | Yeah, like I get up early on Saturdays | 是啊 比如我每次周六都会起来 |
[12:24] | to close the drapes so we can sleep in. | 把窗帘拉上 我们才能睡个懒觉 |
[12:26] | But the drapes are there because she picked them. | 但窗帘是她挑的 |
[12:28] | She never asked my opinion, because I don’t have one. | 她也没问我的意见 因为我没意见 |
[12:30] | In fact, gun to my head, what color are the drapes? | 说实话 现在想想 窗帘什么颜色来着 |
[12:34] | No idea. | 完全不知道 |
[12:36] | But now your opinion’s being respected. | 但现在她很尊重你的意见 |
[12:38] | Yeah, and I don’t like it. | 对 所以我很不爽 |
[12:40] | And all because I won one discussion. | 不过是因为我赢了一次争论 |
[12:43] | So, then maybe you need to have another discussion | 也许你需要再跟她讨论一次 |
[12:45] | and lose that one. | 然后输掉 |
[12:47] | That’ll put you back on the bottom, where you belong. | 这样你就回到了最底层 你最适合那里 |
[12:51] | That’s not a bad idea. | 这主意不赖 |
[12:54] | Yeah. Hey, you want me to lose a fight? | 是啊 想让我讨论输掉吗 |
[12:57] | I’ll lose a fight. This guy’s going down. | 那就输掉 我会输得很惨 |
[12:59] | Now you sound like a real husband. | 这才像一个丈夫该有的语气 |
[13:02] | I don’t think this is working. | 我觉得好像没效果 |
[13:04] | I mean, Adam hasn’t run back in here | 亚当到现在还没有跑进屋 |
[13:06] | telling me that Kate should go to the dance. | 告诉我凯特应该去参加舞会 |
[13:08] | You promised me total domination. | 你不是保证我能征服他吗 |
[13:11] | Just make sure you lose the next discussion with Adam, | 下一次跟亚当讨论时 你一定要输掉 |
[13:13] | whatever it is, so you can keep loading him up with decisions. | 不管讨论什么 这样才能继续给他安排事情 |
[13:16] | Okay, but if I end up with a Van Halen logo on my wall, | 但如果我家厕所刷了范·海伦的标识 |
[13:20] | you’re painting over it. | 你负责重新刷 |
[13:22] | Okay, Joy just left. It’s time. | 好了 高兴刚走 时间到了 |
[13:24] | Okay, champ, you ready to lose this thing? | 好了 笨蛋 准备好输了吗 |
[13:26] | Oh, yeah. I have got a truly terrible argument. | 当然 我的论点简直糟糕透顶 |
[13:29] | – There’s no way I can win. – Ah, that’s the spirit. | -绝对赢不了 -这就对了 |
[13:31] | Now get in there and take a dive, make us all proud. | 赶紧进去认输吧 我以你为荣 |
[13:32] | Okay. | 好 |
[13:36] | Listen, I have something I’d like to discuss. | 听我说 我有点事想跟你讨论 |
[13:39] | Great. I’d love to discuss something. | 太好了 我很想跟你讨论 |
[13:41] | Okay, well, uh, I was thinking about the kids’ summer camp. | 是这样 孩子们的夏令营我有个想法 |
[13:44] | Whatever you’re thinking is right, I’m sure. | 你的想法肯定是对的 |
[13:45] | No, no, hold on. | 那倒不一定 |
[13:47] | I was thinking they shouldn’t go to camp at all. | 我觉得他们应该直接不去夏令营 |
[13:51] | What? | 什么 |
[13:54] | Yeah. I mean, is it really a good idea for kids to have fun? | 对啊 让孩子们玩得开心真的好吗 |
[13:59] | It’ll just make being an adult that much sadder | 等他们当了大人 回想起儿时多欢乐 |
[14:03] | when they think back at all the fun they used to have. | 只会觉得自己现在很惨 |
[14:09] | That is quite a theory. | 你的理论可真了不起 |
[14:11] | Well, that’s what happens when I make decisions. | 我一做决定就是会这样 |
[14:13] | Plus, what are we gonna do for two weeks with no kids, huh? | 再说了 两个礼拜孩子不在我们干什么 |
[14:16] | Take our own vacation? That’s stupid. | 自己去度假吗 这也太扯了 |
[14:20] | That is stupid. | 确实很扯 |
[14:22] | You’re right again. | 你又说对了 |
[14:25] | You always make such good decisions. | 你做决定总是这么英明神武 |
[14:27] | – No, I don’t. – Great job. | -没有啊 -你真厉害 |
[14:31] | Speaking of which, Kate needs new bras. | 说到这个 凯特需要新胸衣 |
[14:33] | Who needs new what, now? What? | 你说谁需要什么东西 什么 |
[14:36] | Just get on the Internet and see what you can find. | 你去网上搜一搜 看能找到什么 |
[14:40] | Teen girl bras? | 少女胸衣吗 |
[14:44] | I don’t want to Google that. | 我可不想查这个 |
[14:45] | We just grounded Teddy for Googling that! | 泰迪查了这个还被我们禁足了 |
[14:50] | I never should’ve used that stupid silent negotiation. | 我就不应该用那个什么破静默商讨术 |
[14:53] | What were you thinking? | 你当时怎么想的啊 |
[14:56] | You told me to do it. | 你让我用的啊 |
[14:58] | I told you what it was; I didn’t tell you to do it. | 我只是跟你讲了是什么 没让你用啊 |
[15:02] | So, Andi was fine with the kids staying home all summer? | 孩子们暑假待在家 安迪没意见吗 |
[15:05] | Yeah. | 对 |
[15:06] | She said I made some good points. | 她说我说的很有道理 |
[15:07] | And I’ll tell you something, I did not. | 我告诉你 我说的屁道理都没有 |
[15:10] | She’s up to something. | 她绝对是有阴谋 |
[15:12] | I bet she knows you used a trick. | 她肯定是知道你用了手段 |
[15:14] | Maybe the reason nobody does it anymore | 也许现在没人用那个手段 |
[15:16] | is because all the wives figured it out. | 是因为已经被老婆们看穿了 |
[15:18] | That’s right. This is why we stopped doing it. | 没错 所以我们才没再用了 |
[15:20] | It unravels marriages. | 它会拆散婚姻 |
[15:24] | What? | 什么 |
[15:27] | They evolved, but we didn’t. | 她们进化了 我们却没有 |
[15:29] | Just like Jurassic Park. | 跟《侏罗纪公园》一样 |
[15:30] | Oh, will you, will you stop with that? | 你能不能别老提这个了 |
[15:33] | See a different movie. | 看个其他电影行不行 |
[15:35] | Why? It explains everything. | 为什么 《侏罗纪公园》能解释一切 |
[15:48] | You don’t want me buying Katie’s bras. | 你不是真想让我给凯特买胸衣 |
[15:49] | You’re playing dirty. | 你在玩阴的 |
[15:51] | You played dirty first. | 是你先玩了阴的 |
[15:52] | No! | 没有 |
[15:54] | Yeah, you got me. | 好吧 被你发现了 |
[15:57] | But, look, I’m already being punished. | 但是你看 我已经受到惩罚了 |
[15:59] | I just want things to go back to normal. | 我现在只希望事情能够回归正常 |
[16:01] | You pick stuff, I watch TV. | 你负责挑东西 我负责看电视 |
[16:05] | I agree, that’s how we work. | 我同意 这样才对 |
[16:07] | Yeah, yeah, yeah. | 是啊 |
[16:11] | How do we do that? | 所以要怎么做 |
[16:13] | I guess we have to go back to the beginning. | 我们只能回到最初的起点了 |
[16:17] | Back to where it all started. | 回到一切的源头 |
[16:19] | Behind the Dumpster at Chili’s? | 你是说辣椒酒吧的垃圾桶后面吗 |
[16:23] | No! We’re never going back that far. | 不是 绝对不能退回到那一步 |
[16:27] | No, I’m talking about Kate and the dance. | 我是说凯特参加舞会的事 |
[16:30] | So, sit down and we can discuss it. | 坐下来吧 我们聊聊 |
[16:38] | I still can’t believe you guys are letting me go to the dance. | 你们居然同意让我去参加舞会了 |
[16:40] | Thank you so much. | 谢谢你们 |
[16:42] | Ah, we went to the chairs, and the Globetrotters won again. | 我们坐下来聊了聊 哈林篮球队长再次获胜 |
[16:46] | I forgot my phone. | 忘拿手机了 |
[16:49] | I am back, baby. | 我回来了 宝贝 |
[16:51] | And now we have a pink bathroom in our house, that I love. | 现在咱家厕所是粉色的了 我很喜欢 |
[16:54] | Oh, technically it’s mauve. | 但其实是粉紫色 |
[16:56] | I am thrilled to say I do not care. | 我很荣幸地说 我不在乎 |
[17:01] | That must be Kate’s date. | 应该是凯特的男伴来了 |
[17:03] | I don’t know why, but I’m feeling nachos. | 不知道为什么 但我想吃玉米片 |
[17:09] | What’s up? | 你们好吗 |
[17:11] | You’re a giant. | 你长得好壮 |
[17:14] | Dad, your friend’s here. | 爸 你朋友来了 |
[17:17] | Is Kate ready? | 凯特准备好了吗 |
[17:19] | Uh, Adam? | 亚当 |
[17:20] | Yeah. Uh, hey, big guy. | 来了 大家伙你好 |
[17:22] | Katie will be out in a minute. Yeah, okay. | 凯特马上出来 稍等 |
[17:25] | We can’t let our daughter go out alone | 可不能让咱家女儿 |
[17:27] | with that-that lumberjack in a tux. | 跟那个穿燕尾服的伐木工单独出去 |
[17:29] | I mean, did you see him? He filled up the whole doorway! | 你看他那个身材 整个走廊都快站不下了 |
[17:30] | All right, all right. Don’t panic, don’t panic. | 好了好了 别慌 稳住 |
[17:33] | Oh, okay. I’ll go with them. | 想到了 我跟他们一起去 |
[17:35] | Yeah. Although, he looked pretty strong. | 没错 虽然他看起来确实很壮 |
[17:39] | I wish I still had that bear spray. | 真希望我的防熊喷雾还在 |
[17:41] | Katie, your date’s here! | 凯特 你的男伴到了 |
[17:42] | – You’ll go? Really? – Yeah, sure. Absolutely, yeah. | -你愿意去吗 真的吗 -当然 |
[17:44] | Apparently, they don’t have a problem | 很显然 他们似乎并不介意 |
[17:45] | with grown men going to their dances. | “壮”年人去参加舞会 |
[17:48] | You’re the best. | 你真好 |
[17:50] | Maybe later we can swing by Chili’s. | 晚点我们可以一起去辣椒酒吧 |
[17:55] | Uh, okay. Uh, come on, we’re going! | 好啊 快来 走吧 |
[17:57] | Wait, you’re going, too? | 等等 你也要去吗 |
[17:58] | Damn right I am. I call shotgun. | 当然要去 我意已决 |
[18:02] | Chili’s. You’re so naughty. | 辣椒酒吧 你这个小妖精 |
[18:12] | How’d it go? | 怎么样 |
[18:13] | I had a blast. | 我玩得特别开心 |
[18:15] | I thought Danny and I kind of had a spark. | 我觉得我和丹尼还挺投缘的 |
[18:18] | Yeah, you two were so cute in the photo booth together. | 是啊 你们拍合照的时候真般配 |
[18:24] | You’ll thank me someday. | 总有一天你会感谢我的 |
[18:27] | No, she won’t. | 她不会的 |
[18:30] | You didn’t embarrass her too bad, did you? | 你没让她太难堪吧 |
[18:31] | Embarrass her? | 让她难堪 |
[18:33] | I won the dance contest. | 我可是赢了舞蹈比赛呢 |
[18:56] | Now we’re even. | 这下扯平了 |
[19:00] | Very funny. See you at prom! | 你很幽默 毕业舞会见 |