| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Dad! | 爸 |
| [00:05] | Yeah. | 在 |
| [00:07] | Who has two thumbs and just got her learner’s permit? | 谁有两个大拇指且刚拿到学车许可 |
| [00:11] | This guy. | 正是我 |
| [00:14] | Katie… | 凯蒂 |
| [00:16] | – Oh, I’m so proud of you. – That’s right. | -我太为你骄傲了 -没错 |
| [00:18] | She passed her written test at the DMV | 她通过了车管所的笔试 |
| [00:20] | and can now practice driving. | 现在可以实习开车了 |
| [00:22] | The citizens of Pittsburgh are trembling in fear. | 匹兹堡的市民已经开始颤抖了 |
| [00:26] | They should be. I barely passed. | 他们应该颤抖 我差点没通过 |
| [00:29] | This is gonna be so great. | 这太令人兴奋了 |
| [00:30] | Once she gets her license, she can run errands | 一旦她拿到驾照 就可以去跑腿了 |
| [00:33] | and pick up dinner and… | 还可以带晚餐 |
| [00:34] | I’m gonna delete Postmates because we made our own. | 我要把外卖软件删掉 因为我们自己有了 |
| [00:39] | She’s a Postkate. | 她就是凯蒂”小哥” |
| [00:42] | Well, h-hold on, hold on. You forgot the best part. | 等一下 你忘了最重要的好处 |
| [00:44] | Not only can she drive our food, she can drive our other kids. | 她不仅可以送餐 还可以帮我们送孩子 |
| [00:49] | Your days of running them around town are over. | 你带着他们满城奔波的日子结束了 |
| [00:52] | If this works, I say we have more kids. | 如果能成 不如我们再生几个 |
| [00:56] | Hold on. I still have to pass my road test. | 别急 我还得通过路考呢 |
| [00:58] | Not a problem. We Burns have driving in our blood. | 不是问题 伯恩斯家的有驾驶基因 |
| [01:02] | I have waited a long time for this, Katie. | 这一刻我等待很久了 凯蒂 |
| [01:04] | Come on. Let’s go have some fun. | 来吧 一起去玩起来 |
| [01:09] | That was the worst hour of my life. | 这一个小时真让我生不如死 |
| [01:14] | What happened to the mirror? | 后视镜怎么了 |
| [01:15] | I was looking for something to hold onto. | 我只是为了保命找个抓手 |
| [01:20] | She wasn’t using it anyway. | 反正她也不会用这个 |
| [01:30] | When you invited us over to watch the game, | 当你说请我们过来看比赛 |
| [01:32] | I assumed we’d be doing it in your living room. | 我以为会是在你家客厅看 |
| [01:34] | Or at least a place with less spiders. | 至少是没有这么多蜘蛛的地方 |
| [01:38] | We’re out here because I’m dodging Andi. | 我们到这来 是因为我在躲避安迪 |
| [01:40] | She wants me to take Katie driving again, | 她还想让我带凯蒂练车 |
| [01:42] | and I need time to recuperate. | 我需要时间恢复 |
| [01:44] | My ankle still hurts from stomping on the imaginary brake. | 下意识狂踩刹车让我脚踝疼到现在 |
| [01:47] | I’m cool with hiding. I need to lay low anyway. | 我可以接受躲着 反正我需要低调 |
| [01:50] | Marcy’s mad at yours truly. | 玛茜还在生这位挚爱的气 |
| [01:51] | Is it because you refer to yourself as “yours truly”? | 是因为你称自己为”你的挚爱”吗 |
| [01:55] | She says I’ve gotten complacent and I don’t romance her anymore. | 她说我变得自满 不会给她制造浪漫了 |
| [01:58] | What does that even mean? | 这到底是什么意思 |
| [02:00] | Maybe you’ve gotten complacent and don’t romance her anymore. | 也许是你变得自满 不会给她制造浪漫了 |
| [02:03] | Oh. You know, it makes sense when a man says it. | 这样啊 从男人嘴里说出来就好理解了 |
| [02:06] | You know, | 知道吗 |
| [02:07] | when I really want to romance a woman, | 当我想给女人制造浪漫 |
| [02:08] | I cook her a gourmet dinner | 我会为她做一顿精致晚餐 |
| [02:10] | with my special handmade gnocchi. | 精心炮制手工意大利面疙瘩 |
| [02:12] | But Marcy cooks dinner. If I cook it, there’ll be two dinners. | 但玛茜是做饭的 如果我再做就做重了 |
| [02:16] | Adam? | 亚当 |
| [02:21] | – Are you hiding out here? – What, n… | -你在这里躲着吗 -我 |
| [02:23] | Your daughter is waiting for her driving lesson. | 你的女儿在等着上驾驶课呢 |
| [02:25] | I-I would love to take her, but I have guests. | 我很愿意带她上课 但我有客人 |
| [02:28] | Can we talk outside? | 我们能出来说吗 |
| [02:29] | Yeah, yeah. | 能 能 |
| [02:31] | Why not let the neighbors hear it? | 让邻居们听听又何妨 |
| [02:35] | You said you wanted to teach Kate how to drive, | 你说过你想教凯蒂开车 |
| [02:37] | but now you’re just avoiding her. | 可眼下你却在躲着她 |
| [02:39] | Hey, Andi! If Marcy asks, you never saw me. | 安迪 如果玛茜问你 就说没看到我 |
| [02:42] | Thanks, doll. | 谢了 美女 |
| [02:45] | Katie is not ready, Andi. | 凯蒂还没有准备好 安迪 |
| [02:47] | There was a left-hand turn where we went | 我们遇到个左转弯 |
| [02:48] | all the way around in a circle. | 我们却一直原地转圈 |
| [02:50] | Like Mario Kart. | 就像马里奥赛车 |
| [02:52] | That’s why you’re teaching her. | 所以你才要教她 |
| [02:54] | Look, Adam, I need Kate to drive. | 亚当 我需要凯蒂会开车 |
| [02:56] | I just signed Teddy up for club soccer. | 我刚给泰迪报了足球俱乐部 |
| [02:58] | – It’s an hour away. I can’t do it. – No… | -有一个小时车程 我办不到 -不 |
| [03:02] | I’m sorry, but 16 is too young to drive. | 抱歉 但十六岁开车还是太小 |
| [03:05] | 16-year-olds can’t vote, they can’t drink, | 十六岁不能投票 不能饮酒 |
| [03:08] | they can’t see movies with boobs. | 也不能看过分暴露的电影 |
| [03:10] | How does it make sense that they can drive to a movie with boobs, | 如果他们能开车去电影院 却不能看限制级电影 |
| [03:12] | but can’t go in? | 这说得通吗 |
| [03:16] | Look, if you won’t get behind the wheel with Kate, | 听着 如果你不愿意和凯蒂同行 |
| [03:18] | I’ll teach her. | 那就我来教她 |
| [03:19] | I’m a better driver than you anyway. | 反正我比你开得好 |
| [03:23] | Now, Katie, | 好了 凯蒂 |
| [03:24] | I don’t want what happened last time to happen again. | 我不想上次出现的事情再次发生 |
| [03:27] | You mean all your yelling? | 是说你大喊大叫吗 |
| [03:29] | I only yelled one time. It just lasted the whole drive. | 我只大叫了一次 只不过持续了整个车程 |
| [03:33] | Today, we’re gonna try a point system. | 今天我们来尝试下用分数制 |
| [03:36] | You start with a hundred points. | 你一开始有一百分 |
| [03:37] | If you do something wrong, you lose points. | 如果你做错了 就扣分 |
| [03:39] | When you get to zero, we are done driving until the next day. Hmm? | 如果扣到零分 我们今天就不练了 第二天再说 |
| [03:43] | Sounds fair. | 合理 |
| [03:44] | Okay. Uhp-uhp, hold on, hold up, hold up. | 不不 等一下 等一下 |
| [03:46] | Remember what I taught you? | 记得我教过你的吗 |
| [03:48] | What’s the first thing you do before you start the vehicle? | 在启动汽车前第一步要做什么 |
| [03:51] | You check your… | 你要查看你的… |
| [03:53] | Text messages. | 短信息 |
| [03:55] | So you’re not tempted while you’re driving. | 这样你开车时候就不会分心 |
| [03:57] | No, no, no. No-no texting. | 不不不 不能发短信 |
| [03:59] | Minus 20 points. | 减二十分 |
| [04:01] | No, you check your mirrors. | 你要查看后视镜 |
| [04:04] | Got it. | 明白 |
| [04:06] | Cute, cute. | 可爱 可爱 |
| [04:08] | Cute. | 可爱 |
| [04:13] | Okay, uh, put your hands on the wheel. | 好吧 把手放到方向盘上 |
| [04:17] | Both hands. You’re not a pimp. | 双手 你不是拉皮条的 |
| [04:19] | That’s how you do it. | 你就是这么做的 |
| [04:21] | Minus 30 for being funny in the car. | 减三十分 因为你在车里胡闹 |
| [04:23] | This is a serious place. | 这里是严肃的地方 |
| [04:25] | Now put your hands at ten and two, like a clock. | 把你的手放在时钟两点和十点的地方 |
| [04:28] | No one uses clocks anymore. What would it be on a phone? | 现在已经没人用时钟了 在手机上是什么样呢 |
| [04:31] | Minus 50 for not understanding clocks. | 减五十分 因为你不会看时钟 |
| [04:33] | You’re out of points. | 你没分了 |
| [04:35] | But we didn’t even leave the driveway. | 我们都没离开门前车道呢 |
| [04:36] | Right. I’ll text the neighbors and let them know | 好的 我准备发信息告诉邻居们 |
| [04:38] | it’s safe to go outside. | 现在出来是安全的 |
| [04:45] | So, I was just talking to Kate. | 我刚刚和凯蒂聊了 |
| [04:47] | You guys have been driving every day for two weeks | 你们已经保持两周每天都练车了 |
| [04:49] | and she thinks she’s ready for her DMV road test. | 她认为自己准备好参加车管所路考了 |
| [04:52] | No, she’s not ready. I told you. | 她没准备好 我告诉过你 |
| [04:54] | Yesterday, she got out of the car before she put it in park. | 昨天 她车还没有停到位就下车了 |
| [04:57] | I had to Fred Flintstone it to a stop. | 我只能用脚踹地 才停下 |
| [05:01] | Just take her to the test. I don’t want to go back | 带她去考试吧 我不想回到 |
| [05:02] | in the garage with the spiders. | 满是蜘蛛的车库了 |
| [05:04] | I squashed one and the others are out for revenge. | 我碾死一只 其他的就都出来报仇了 |
| [05:06] | They saw me kill their friend. | 因为看到我杀死了它们的朋友 |
| [05:09] | I love Katie, but I don’t think she’ll ever be a good driver. | 我爱凯蒂 但我不觉得她能成为一个好司机 |
| [05:12] | You promised me that my days | 是你给我承诺说 |
| [05:14] | of running the kids around town were over. | 我带孩子满城奔波的日子结束了 |
| [05:17] | But here I am, | 结果现在 |
| [05:18] | going to pick up Teddy at soccer, | 我要去足球班接泰迪 |
| [05:20] | which is basically in Canada. | 基本上等于去一趟加拿大 |
| [05:23] | Book the test. | 预约考试吧 |
| [05:27] | What am I gonna do? | 我该怎么办 |
| [05:28] | I don’t think Katie will pass, | 我觉得凯蒂通过不了 |
| [05:30] | but I’m tired of being the bad guy. | 但我又不愿意做坏人 |
| [05:32] | So let the DMV be the bad guy. | 那就让车管所做坏人 |
| [05:33] | If she’s not ready, no license. | 如果她没准备好 就没驾照 |
| [05:36] | I like it. The state of Pennsylvania | 不错 宾夕法尼亚州 |
| [05:38] | will do my dirty work for me. | 会帮我把脏活干了 |
| [05:40] | This is why I pay taxes. | 这就是我交税的原因 |
| [05:42] | Well, I was going to suggest telling Kate honestly | 我本来想建议你坦白告诉凯蒂 |
| [05:45] | how you feel, but I forgot I was with this family. | 你的感受 但我忘了我面对的是你们一家子 |
| [05:50] | The game started an hour ago. Where you been? | 比赛都开始一个小时了 你去哪了 |
| [05:52] | Getting yelled at by Marcy. | 被玛茜大骂一顿 |
| [05:54] | She’s still mad at you? | 她还在生你的气 |
| [05:55] | No, she’s mad at me again. | 不 她又生我的气了 |
| [05:57] | I didn’t pick her up from exercise class. | 因为我没去健身班接她 |
| [05:59] | You forgot to pick up your own wife? | 你忘记接自己的妻子了 |
| [06:01] | I didn’t forget. | 我没忘 |
| [06:02] | It was raining, and I had just gotten the car washed. | 因为那天下雨 我正好刚洗完车 |
| [06:06] | Oh, Donald. | 唐纳德 |
| [06:08] | And now she says I’m cut off in the bedroom | 现在她说我被逐出卧室了 |
| [06:10] | until I learn how to be more romantic and thoughtful. | 直到我学会如何做到更加浪漫体贴 |
| [06:13] | So you’ll never have sex again. | 你再也不会有性生活了 |
| [06:15] | Can’t say I’m gonna miss the stories. | 说不定我还会怀念你的描述 |
| [06:17] | Maybe there’s a way to fix this. | 也许有办法弥补 |
| [06:19] | Lowell, show me how to make your magic nookie dinner. | 洛厄尔 教我怎么做魔力面瘫晚餐 |
| [06:22] | It’s pronounced gnocchi. | 是意大利面疙瘩 |
| [06:25] | I’m not hearing the difference. | 有什么区别吗 |
| [06:30] | Hi. Uh, my daughter’s here to take her road test. | 你好 我女儿来参加路考 |
| [06:33] | Here’s my I.D. | 这是我的身份证 |
| [06:35] | Adam Burns, parent/legal guardian. | 亚当·伯恩斯 父母或合法监护人 |
| [06:40] | Arthur, DMV clerk/hedge fund playboy. | 亚瑟 车管所职员或对冲基金玩家 |
| [06:48] | Everything’s in order. | 一切准备就绪 |
| [06:49] | Take these forms to window 12 for your road test. | 拿着这些表格去十二窗口等待路考 |
| [06:53] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [06:55] | I’m kind of nervous. | 我有些紧张 |
| [06:56] | Well, I’m sure you’ll do great, honey. | 你会手到擒来的 亲爱的 |
| [06:58] | And if you don’t, that’s the state of Pennsylvania talking. | 如果没有 也是宾夕法尼亚州的错 |
| [07:00] | Not me. | 不是我的 |
| [07:02] | Okay? | 好吗 |
| [07:03] | All right, now go get ’em. | 好了 去大展身手吧 |
| [07:04] | Come on. | 走吧 |
| [07:08] | Whoopsie-doodle. | 大事不好 |
| [07:09] | I’m afraid your license expired three months ago. | 恐怕你的驾照在三个月前到期了 |
| [07:13] | What? Okay, uh, so how do I fix that? | 什么 好吧 我要怎么处理 |
| [07:16] | I sign a form or…? | 填个表还是… |
| [07:17] | Since you let it expire, you have to take the written test | 由于你到期未续 你只能参加笔试 |
| [07:21] | before it can be renewed. | 才能重新续期 |
| [07:22] | Here’s your number. Wait to be called. | 这是你的号码 等待叫号 |
| [07:25] | Next! | 下一位 |
| [07:26] | Uh, uh, hold on, hold on. | 等一下 等一下 |
| [07:28] | So, if I had caught this before it expired, | 所以假如我在到期前续期 |
| [07:30] | I wouldn’t have to take the test? | 就不用参加考试了吗 |
| [07:32] | Correct. Next. | 没错 下一位 |
| [07:34] | Uh– You stay. | 你等会 |
| [07:37] | Can’t we just do something with this license? | 我们有没有什么方法弄一下这个驾照 |
| [07:38] | You know, like, slap a sticker on it or… | 比如 贴个标签或者什么 |
| [07:41] | Actually, yes, there is something we can do. | 实际上 有一个方法可以弄 |
| [07:44] | Thank you. | 感谢 |
| [07:46] | Ooh. What’s that? Sticker machine? | 这是什么 贴纸机吗 |
| [08:01] | This is why no one likes coming here, Arthur. | 所以人们不喜欢来这里 亚瑟 |
| [08:07] | Now serving number 42. | 请42号客户到窗口 |
| [08:10] | Ah, finally. | 终于 |
| [08:20] | You made me wait a half an hour just to talk to you again? | 你让我等半个小时 只为和你再次说话 |
| [08:23] | It’s not a job if you love what you do. | 如果喜欢一份工作 它就不再是工作 |
| [08:29] | The written driver’s test is on the tablet. | 驾驶员笔试在平板电脑上 |
| [08:31] | If you get three wrong, you fail | 如果你答错三题 就不及格 |
| [08:33] | and have to wait a week to retake it. | 只能一周后重考 |
| [08:35] | Not a problem. | 小意思 |
| [08:37] | When I get the high score, can I put my initials in? | 如果我拿到高分 可以在系统留名吗 |
| [08:40] | No. | 不可以 |
| [08:42] | That was a joke. | 这是个笑点 |
| [08:43] | No, it wasn’t. | 不 这不是 |
| [08:46] | I’m just gonna take the test now, Arthur. | 我现在要开始考试了 亚瑟 |
| [08:48] | And, yes, I will be taking the survey after. | 而且 结束后我要填满意度调查的 |
| [08:54] | Uh, B. Stop sign. | B 停车标志 |
| [08:58] | Uh, C. No passing zone. | C 禁止通过区域 |
| [09:02] | Uh, D. Emergency vehicles only. | D 仅限应急车辆 |
| [09:05] | Chime city over here, Arthur. | 叮咚 全都对 亚瑟 |
| [09:09] | I’m so good, I don’t even have to look. | 我优秀到看都不用看 |
| [09:16] | Okay, I got cocky. | 好吧 我装逼了 |
| [09:17] | Let’s focus. | 专心点 |
| [09:23] | Look, I meant to push B. | 我本来想按B的 |
| [09:24] | The– My fingers are swollen. | 我的手指头太肿了 |
| [09:26] | I-I’m retaining water ’cause I had a salty lunch. | 我中午吃咸了 所以身体水分过多 |
| [09:30] | One more wrong answer and you fail. | 再答错一道 就不及格 |
| [09:33] | No pressure. | 别有压力 |
| [09:44] | A white painted curve indicates | 一个白色的弧线代表 |
| [09:46] | A passengers and mail only.” | A 仅限乘客和信件 |
| [09:49] | That’s too specific. Eh… | 这太具体了 |
| [09:51] | “B Service dogs only.” | B 仅限服务犬 |
| [09:54] | Nice try, Arthur. | 想得美 亚瑟 |
| [09:57] | So, by process of elimination, it’s “C freight only.” | 所以通过排除法 是C 仅限货物 |
| [10:01] | Uh, final answer. | 最终答案 |
| [10:03] | Fail. | 不及格 |
| [10:04] | Whoopsie-doodle. | 哎呦呦 |
| [10:08] | I passed! | 我通过了 |
| [10:13] | Now we can both drive. | 现在 我们都可以开车了 |
| [10:19] | What happened? | 怎么了 |
| [10:20] | Your dad has a fun surprise for you. | 你老爸有个惊喜给你 |
| [10:28] | So Kate got her license | 所以凯特拿到驾照了 |
| [10:30] | and you lost yours. | 而你的驾照没了 |
| [10:37] | It isn’t funny. | 不好笑 |
| [10:40] | I’m sorry. Can I get you a beer? | 抱歉 给你拿瓶啤酒 |
| [10:42] | – I would love one. – I’m gonna need to see some I.D. | -求之不得 -先给我看证件 |
| [10:48] | – Where’s Katie? – Oh, she went for a drive. | -凯蒂人呢 -她去开车了 |
| [10:53] | You just let her leave in the car by herself? | 你让她自己出去开车了 |
| [10:55] | Yes, she has a license. | 对 她有驾照 |
| [10:59] | But we have no idea where she is. | 可我们不知道她在哪里啊 |
| [11:02] | Our daughter could be anywhere in this city right now | 我们的女儿现在可能身在城市里的任何一处 |
| [11:04] | and you seem perfectly comfortable with that. | 你居然完全不担心 |
| [11:06] | Because I trust her. | 因为我相信她 |
| [11:08] | And also because I put a tracking app on her phone. | 也因为我在她手机里装了跟踪软件 |
| [11:12] | See, look, she-she’s fine. | 看 她没事 |
| [11:14] | She’s at the Whitestone Overlook. | 她在白石观景点 |
| [11:16] | That’s make-out point! | 那是亲热圣地 |
| [11:20] | Okay, Fonzie. | 好吧 方兹 |
| [11:22] | People go up there for other reasons. | 大家去那里不都为了亲热 |
| [11:24] | Yeah, to murder teenagers who are making out. | 对 去谋杀亲热的青少年 |
| [11:28] | I’m going up there to check on her. | 我要去看看她 |
| [11:30] | You’re not allowed to drive. | 你不能开车 |
| [11:32] | Then, uh, you take me. | 那你带我去 |
| [11:33] | No. | 不去 |
| [11:35] | I am not gonna be part of your craziness. | 我才不要跟你一起疯 |
| [11:38] | Kate is fine. She just wanted to go for a drive. | 凯特没事 她就是想开车兜兜风 |
| [11:40] | That’s what people do when they get their license. | 大家拿到驾照都想去兜风 |
| [11:44] | I’m sure you’ll want to do the same when you get yours. | 估计你拿回驾照也会去的 |
| [11:52] | Read the room, Andi. | 看看场合 安迪 |
| [11:57] | I did. Half the room thinks it’s funny. | 我看了 半个场合跟我一起乐呢 |
| [12:04] | Oh, thanks for coming. I really want to knock Marcy’s socks off, | 谢谢你能来 我真得很想脱掉玛茜的袜子 |
| [12:07] | and hopefully, the rest of her clothes. | 希望其他衣服能脱掉 |
| [12:09] | Is she home? | 她在家吗 |
| [12:10] | No, I told her to take a hike. | 不在 我让她去远点的地方待着 |
| [12:12] | And she says you don’t romance her. | 她居然说你不浪漫 |
| [12:15] | Okay, here’s | 好的 这就是 |
| [12:16] | shrimp scampi with handmade gnocchi. | 蒜香意大利虾仁面疙瘩 |
| [12:18] | It works every time. | 屡试不爽 |
| [12:20] | The only downside is I’ve gained six pounds | 唯一的缺点就是我胖了六斤 |
| [12:22] | and no longer feel comfortable naked. | 躶体的时候略自卑 |
| [12:25] | I can’t do this. This is cooking. | 我不会做 这是做饭 |
| [12:27] | Lowell, you have to do it for me. | 洛厄尔 你一定要帮我做 |
| [12:29] | That’s not the way it works. | 不是这样做的 |
| [12:30] | Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. | 授人以鱼 |
| [12:32] | Teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime. | 不如授人以渔 |
| [12:35] | But I only want to eat for a day. | 可我就想要条鱼 |
| [12:38] | Give me my fish, Lowell. | 把鱼给我 洛厄尔 |
| [12:44] | Dad! | 爸 |
| [12:47] | What… what are you doing here? | 你在这干嘛 |
| [12:48] | What… what are you doing here? | 你在这干嘛 |
| [12:49] | Did you know this is make-out point? | 你知道这是亲热圣地吗 |
| [12:51] | All the teen moms in Pittsburgh | 匹兹堡所有的少女妈妈 |
| [12:53] | get their start right here. | 都是从这开始失足的 |
| [12:57] | No, I just wanted to go for a drive. | 不是 我只是想开车兜风 |
| [12:59] | Well, you need to go home right now | 你现在马上回家 |
| [13:01] | because I’ll tell you something, Katie, | 我告诉你 凯蒂 |
| [13:02] | you’re not ready for this. | 你还没准备好 |
| [13:04] | – For what? – The world. | -准备什么 -面对世界 |
| [13:06] | You are too young and too naive. | 你还太小太天真 |
| [13:09] | In fact, you’re grounded. | 告诉你 你被禁足了 |
| [13:12] | Why? ‘Cause I passed my driver’s test? | 为什么 因为我驾照考试通过了吗 |
| [13:14] | Yes! N-No, no. It’s because | 对 不对 因为 |
| [13:16] | you don’t understand how dangerous the world is. | 你还不知道这个世界有多危险 |
| [13:19] | There could be a crazy man up here. | 这里可能有疯子 |
| [13:22] | I think there is. | 这里真有 |
| [13:26] | You never used to talk to me like that. | 你以前从来不会这么跟我讲话 |
| [13:28] | This license has changed you. | 驾照让你膨胀了 |
| [13:31] | I’m crazy? She’s crazy. She won’t listen to me. | 我疯了 是她疯了 居然不听我的话 |
| [13:35] | Minus a hundred points. | 扣一百分 |
| [13:40] | Ugh, of course. | 必须的 |
| [13:46] | – Evening, sir. – Can I help you, Officer? | -晚上好 先生 -有什么事吗 警官 |
| [13:48] | I couldn’t help but notice you leaving make-out point alone | 我注意到你一个人从亲热圣地驶离 |
| [13:51] | and old. | 还是老头 |
| [13:54] | All right, no need to hurt people’s feelings here. | 用这样吗 别这么扎心啊 |
| [13:57] | We just want to keep things safe for the kids. License, please. | 我只想保证孩子们的安全 出示驾照 谢谢 |
| [14:01] | Sure. Yeah. | 当然了 |
| [14:09] | Step out of the car, sir. | 从车里出来 先生 |
| [14:15] | Oh, good, the crazy vigilante is home. | 太好了 疯警卫队员回来了 |
| [14:19] | A dad’s got to do what a dad’s got to do. | 老爸就该履行老爸的职责 |
| [14:21] | Sometimes you have to be the bad guy. | 有时候没办法 只能当坏人 |
| [14:24] | Kate is upstairs, very upset. | 凯特在楼上 非常不开心 |
| [14:26] | Okay, you grounded her for no reason. | 你毫无道理就禁足她 |
| [14:28] | I had reasons. I had good reasons. | 我有道理 很大的道理 |
| [14:32] | Oh, really? Like what? | 是吗 什么道理 |
| [14:33] | Like she’s not ready. | 比如她没准备好 |
| [14:34] | A car lets you leave, and I’m not ready. | 一辆车可以让你离开 我还没准备好 |
| [14:39] | Wait. | 等等 |
| [14:41] | She’s not ready, or you’re not ready? | 她没准备好 还是你没准备好 |
| [14:43] | What-Whatever. | 随便吧 |
| [14:45] | Somebody isn’t ready, so nobody leaves. | 反正有人没准备好 所以谁都不能离开 |
| [14:46] | Nobody leaves until everybody’s ready. | 直到所有人都准备好前 谁都不能离开 |
| [14:51] | Honey, do you remember when Kate was 12, and we decided | 亲爱的 还记得凯特12岁的时候 |
| [14:55] | that she was old enough to go to the mall by herself, | 我们决定她可以自己去商场了 |
| [14:57] | so I’d drop her off with her friends | 然后我把她和朋友们送过去 |
| [14:59] | and then secretly follow her around? | 然后偷偷跟踪她吗 |
| [15:00] | Yeah, I remember you army crawling through the food court. | 记得 你匍匐前行通过食品区 |
| [15:05] | That was me freaking out because I didn’t think our baby | 当时是我害怕了 因为担心我们的宝贝 |
| [15:07] | was ready to go out into the world alone. | 还没准备好独自面对世界 |
| [15:10] | Then one day, | 在那天 |
| [15:11] | she caught me riding the carousel | 她发现我坐在旋转木马上 |
| [15:12] | with a pair of binoculars around my neck. | 脖子上挂了一副望远镜 |
| [15:16] | That’s when I realized that I was the one who wasn’t ready. | 那时候我才知道 是我没有准备好 |
| [15:22] | Oh, so this is your fault, I like that. | 所以都是你的错 我喜欢这个走向 |
| [15:26] | No, I’m saying we need to be ready. | 不是 我是说我们需要准备好 |
| [15:30] | But what if I’m not? | 我没准备好怎么办 |
| [15:33] | Sweetie, | 亲爱的 |
| [15:34] | Kate was fine back then and she’s fine now. | 凯蒂那时候没问题 现在她也可以 |
| [15:38] | But I got to be honest, you are right in the middle | 我实话实说 你很有可能错过 |
| [15:40] | of spoiling one of the biggest moments of her life. | 她人生中非常重要的时刻 |
| [15:49] | Go ahead. | 说吧 |
| [15:51] | You can say it. | 你可以说的 |
| [15:57] | – You’re right. – I know. | -你说得对 -我知道 |
| [16:05] | Marcy’s home early. Hide. | 玛茜提前回来了 藏起来 |
| [16:07] | – Where should I go? – Under the table. | -我藏哪 -桌子下面 |
| [16:09] | I’ll get her out of the room, you take off. | 我把她弄出房间 你脱身 |
| [16:11] | Fine, but don’t forget to turn the asparagus down to a simmer, | 好 但别忘了把芦笋的火调小煨炖 |
| [16:14] | a simmer! | 煨炖 |
| [16:21] | What’s all this? | 这是搞得哪出 |
| [16:23] | I love you, baby, so I’m romancing you | 我爱你 宝贝 所以我跟你搞浪漫 |
| [16:25] | with shrimp and handmade nookie. | 做了蒜香意大利虾仁魔力面瘫晚餐 |
| [16:28] | This looks amazing. | 真是太棒了 |
| [16:30] | That whole time I thought you weren’t doing anything, | 我还一直以为你什么都没做 |
| [16:33] | you were taking cooking classes. | 结果你去学了厨艺 |
| [16:35] | Yeah, whatever you say. Let’s eat. | 就是那意思 我们吃饭吧 |
| [16:39] | Why don’t we start with dessert? | 何不用甜点做头盘 |
| [16:44] | So this really worked? | 你真的吃这套 |
| [16:45] | Oh, yeah, Chef. | 当然 大厨 |
| [16:46] | – Oh, Marcy. – Oh, Don. | -玛茜 -老唐 |
| [16:49] | C-Can this table hold us? | 这桌子经得住吗 |
| [16:51] | If it breaks, it breaks. Okay. | 散就散了 |
| [17:11] | I’m not going anywhere. I’m just sitting here. | 我哪里都不去 就坐在这 |
| [17:14] | I get it. | 我明白 |
| [17:16] | I did the same thing when I first started driving. | 我刚开始开车的时候 做了一样的事 |
| [17:22] | That’s smart. Don’t let crazy people in your car. | 很聪明 避免疯子上你的车 |
| [17:27] | I just want to say I’m sorry. | 我想跟你说声对不起 |
| [17:30] | I know what a big deal this is for you. | 我知道这对你来说 是一件大事 |
| [17:36] | You know, when I got my license, it meant I was growing up | 当我拿到驾照的时候 意味着我长大了 |
| [17:41] | and it was the greatest feeling in the world. | 那感觉真是太棒了 |
| [17:44] | But now that I’m a parent, watching it happen to you, | 可我现在是个家长 看着你拿到驾照 |
| [17:48] | it is the scariest feeling in the world. | 却感觉简直太恐怖了 |
| [18:11] | Go on. | 接着说啊 |
| [18:13] | I believe you were saying nice things to me. | 你肯定是要对我说些好话 |
| [18:20] | Look… you’re my little girl. | 听着 你是我的小闺女 |
| [18:25] | It’s hard for me to accept that you’re growing up. | 我很难接受你要长大这个事实 |
| [18:30] | As soon as I saw you behind the wheel, | 当我看到你坐到方向盘后 |
| [18:34] | I saw you leaving. | 看着你离开 |
| [18:37] | That’s what people do in a car, they leave. | 人们开上车就会这样 离开 |
| [18:43] | Dad, you’re such a marshmallow. | 爸 你真是个棉花糖 |
| [18:47] | I just, I wish I had more time. | 我希望我还能有时间 |
| [18:50] | There’s so much left to teach you. | 还有很多东西要教给你 |
| [18:52] | L-Like, when you’re walking to your car at night, | 比如晚上上车的时候碰到人 |
| [18:56] | you pepper spray first, you ask questions later. | 先喷辣椒水 再问问题 |
| [18:59] | Okay, got it. | 好 明白了 |
| [19:00] | And-and-and if a guy calls you after 10 o’clock | 如果有男人晚上十点后打电话给你 |
| [19:03] | he only wants one thing. | 他只想要那一件事 |
| [19:04] | And if a guy calls you before 10 o’clock, | 如果一个男人在十点前打电话给你 |
| [19:07] | he’s just trying to beat the other guy. | 他是希望自己成为那个人 |
| [19:08] | Trust me, I have been both guys. | 相信我 这两种人我都当过 |
| [19:14] | I’m not leaving now. | 我现在不走 |
| [19:16] | You don’t have to squeeze it all in tonight. | 你不用一晚上都说完 |
| [19:20] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [19:25] | But since I got you, | 从你出生后 |
| [19:27] | here’s the most important thing you need to know… | 有件最重要的事 你需要知道 |
| [19:32] | I love you so much. | 我非常爱你 |
| [19:37] | I love you, too, Dad. | 我也爱你 爸爸 |
| [19:49] | So, now will you admit that I’m an excellent driver? | 所以 你现在可以承认我驾驶技术超棒了吧 |
| [19:55] | I love you so much. | 我非常爱你 |
| [20:04] | Who has two thumbs and passed his DMV test? | 谁有两个大拇指且刚通过了车管局考试 |
| [20:08] | This guy. | 正是我 |
| [20:13] | Never a doubt. In fact, | 没怀疑过 事实上 |
| [20:15] | I made you a special dinner to celebrate. | 我特别给你做了晚餐庆祝 |
| [20:17] | Shrimp scampi and handmade gnocchi. | 蒜香意大利虾仁面疙瘩 |
| [20:22] | I got the recipe from Lowell. | 我跟洛厄尔要的菜谱 |
| [20:23] | Oh, that looks delicious, | 看起来太美味了 |
| [20:25] | but how about if we start with dessert? | 何不用甜点做头盘 |
| [20:30] | Not again! Fool me once! | 别再来了 好汉不吃二遍亏 |