| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | – Oh, hey, honey. Have a great time at the game. – Thanks. | -亲爱的 好好享受比赛哦 -谢谢 |
| [00:08] | Oh. Why are you crunching? | 什么在响 |
| [00:10] | Ordinarily, I’m a rule follower, | 通常 我是守规矩的人 |
| [00:12] | but when someone tells me I can’t bring | 但是如果有人不准我 |
| [00:13] | my own snacks into their stadium, | 自带零食进体育馆 |
| [00:16] | that’s when I get a little nuts. | 我就要生气[坚果]了 |
| [00:19] | It’s a free country, right? | 这是个自由的国家不是吗 |
| [00:21] | Let’s just say it ruffles me… | 这么说吧 让我不爽[薯片]的是 |
| [00:24] | when some goobers tell me… | 某些蠢货[花生]叫我 |
| [00:25] | I have to spend half my payday… | 在发薪日[糖]花上半天 |
| [00:28] | on their hot dogs. | 在他们的热狗上 |
| [00:32] | Please, just remember the family portrait. | 记得回来照全家福 |
| [00:34] | – We only have the photographer for an hour. Okay? – Okay. | -摄影师只有一个小时时间 -好吧 |
| [00:37] | And, sweetie, did you have a chance to | 亲爱的 要不要去试试 |
| [00:39] | try on the white pants I put in your closet? | 我放在你衣橱里面的白裤子 |
| [00:40] | Oh, what do they look like? | 哦 长什么样的 |
| [00:42] | Is there really a more clear way to describe white pants? | 白裤子还能长什么样 |
| [00:46] | Sweetie, if they don’t fit you, | 亲爱的 如果不合适 |
| [00:47] | you’re going to be the only one not wearing white, | 你就是全家唯一没穿白裤子的人了 |
| [00:49] | and then you’re gonna stand out like “Where’s Waldo?” | 然后你就像”沃尔多在哪里”一样明显扎眼 |
| [00:49] | [美国儿童杂志上的一款游戏 读者要在一群人当中找出沃尔多] | |
| [00:52] | Actually, “Where’s Waldo?” doesn’t stand out. | 实际上 沃尔多在哪里不会明显扎眼 |
| [00:54] | He’s super hard to find. That’s the challenge. | 你很难找到他 那正是游戏乐趣所在 |
| [00:55] | This portrait is incredibly important to me. | 此次全家福对我来说很重要 |
| [00:57] | Also, his name is just “Waldo.” | 而且 他就叫沃尔多 没有”在哪里” |
| [00:58] | I spent weeks trying to find | 我花了好几周时间才选到 |
| [01:00] | a time that works for everybody… | 一个每个人都有空的时间 |
| [01:01] | and finding the right photographer. | 还有合适的摄影师 |
| [01:03] | So if you could just promise me that you’ll cooperate, okay? | 你向我保证会乖乖合作 好吗 |
| [01:07] | – I promise. -Okay. | -我保证 -好吧 |
| [01:08] | – This is amazing that you’re doing this. – Mmm, thank you. | -你想得真周到 -谢谢 |
| [01:11] | – You’re wonderful. – Thank you. | -你太棒了 -谢谢 |
| [01:13] | Get in here | 过来 |
| [01:14] | – Oh, no can do. – Oh. | -哎呀使不得 -哦 |
| [01:16] | – I love you. – Bye. | -我爱你 -拜拜 |
| [01:21] | Where’s my good underwear? | 我的好内裤哪去了 |
| [01:23] | The question is, | 问题应该是 |
| [01:24] | why isn’t all your underwear good, Jay? | 为什么你还有烂内裤 杰 |
| [01:27] | You make a nice living. | 你赚钱那么多 |
| [01:28] | The new maid keeps mixing up my underwear with Manny’s. | 新来的佣人老是把我的内裤和曼尼的弄混 |
| [01:31] | Put on the first thing I grabbed. | 有一次我随便抓了一条 |
| [01:32] | It was like a crotch tourniquet. | 紧得跟止血带一样 |
| [01:34] | – You gotta talk to her. – Why me? | -你得跟她说啊 -为什么让我说 |
| [01:35] | Hola. You both speak the same language. | 喂 你们说一样的语言 |
| [01:38] | She’s Portuguese. Do you know how offensive it is… | 她是葡萄牙人 你知不知道 |
| [01:41] | that you put all of us in the same mixing pot? | 把我们混为一类人是很不礼貌的 |
| [01:44] | Sorry. Please apologize to her when you tell her not to | 抱歉 请代我给她道个歉 还告诉她 |
| [01:46] | – put my underwear- – I can’t talk to her! | -不要把我的内裤 -我们语言不通 |
| [01:51] | – Where’s Luke? – I’m going instead. | -卢克呢 -我代替他去 |
| [01:54] | Luke suddenly remembered a school project due tomorrow. | 卢克有个家庭作业明天就要交了 |
| [01:56] | Oh, that’s tough. | 噢 太不幸了 |
| [01:57] | But it’s a good lesson for the kid. | 但是这对他可能是不错的一课 |
| [01:58] | You know, you make a commitment, | 你作了承诺 |
| [02:00] | – you gotta follow through. – Yeah. | -你得要兑现 -对 |
| [02:01] | What is the project? | 是什么作业 |
| [02:02] | He has to interview somebody who lived through the 1960s. | 他要采访一个曾经生活在60年代的人 |
| [02:05] | Oh, no. | 不会吧 |
| [02:09] | Hello. | 喂 |
| [02:10] | Yeah, Luke. | 是啊 卢克 |
| [02:12] | Oh, sure. I remember what I said. | 当然 我记得我承诺过什么 |
| [02:14] | Yeah, come on over. All right. | 过来吧 好 |
| [02:17] | Gloria, you’re gonna have to take Manny to the game. | 歌洛莉亚 你得带曼尼去看比赛 |
| [02:19] | Yay. Manny, vamos! | 好耶 曼尼 快点 |
| [02:22] | I’m still getting dressed. | 我还在穿衣服呢 |
| [02:23] | Hey, Mom, I think my diet’s working. | 妈 我觉得我减肥有效果了 |
| [02:26] | My underwear won’t stay up. | 我内裤都松了 |
| [02:46] | Oh, so delicious. Yes. | 好吃 来 |
| [02:48] | Hey, you’re okay with me not going with you today, right? | 今天不和你去没关系吧 |
| [02:51] | I have been hired to sing at a wedding this weekend. | 有人请我周末去婚礼献唱 |
| [02:55] | I was plucked from obscurity | 我在一次精彩的卡拉OK |
| [02:56] | after a particularly stirring karaoke performance. | 演出后被别人选中了 |
| [03:01] | So I guess you could say I’m a professional singer now. | 所以说呢 我也算是专业歌手了 |
| [03:04] | Well, they’re paying you in flowers, so- | 他们是以花代钱付给你的 所以呢 |
| [03:07] | Well, I would’ve blown the money on flowers anyway. | 反正就算他们给钱 我也会拿去买花的 |
| [03:08] | They’re saving me a step. | 他们倒是省了我的麻烦 |
| [03:09] | Plus all the great divas are rewarded in flowers. | 再说所有的歌后都有人献花 |
| [03:13] | They’re also given paychecks. | 然后还有支票 |
| [03:15] | And I’m really bad at small talk, so- | 我不大擅长闲聊 所以呢 |
| [03:18] | I get it. It’s not a problem. | 我懂了 没什么问题 |
| [03:20] | Are you sure? ‘Cause you’ve been quiet all morning. | 是吗 我看你一早上没说话 |
| [03:22] | It’s because I’m resting my instrument. | 因为我得酝酿一下我的嗓子 |
| [03:25] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [03:28] | I feel tension. | 我看他是压力巨大 |
| [03:33] | Kobe! Kobe, over here! | 科比 科比 这边 |
| [03:35] | Kobe! Kobe! Over here! | 科比 科比 这边 |
| [03:38] | What can I do for you? | 需要帮忙吗 |
| [03:40] | Do you like being a basketball player? | 你喜欢当篮球运动员吗 |
| [03:44] | Serious? | 不是吧你 |
| [03:46] | I choked. I didn’t think you’d look up here at me. | 我紧张了 我没想到你会往这边看 |
| [03:48] | Little preparation next time. | 那下次准备下 |
| [03:49] | It’s a mental game. | 用用脑子好好想哦 |
| [03:51] | Duly noted. | 懂了 |
| [03:52] | – All right. – Your Los Angeles Lakers! | -好 -湖人队入场 |
| [04:03] | – What’s wrong? – That broken step. | -怎么了 -楼梯坏了 |
| [04:06] | It’s gonna ruin our whole family portrait. | 全家福会因此被毁的 |
| [04:08] | Okay, here’s my idea. I’m really excited about it. | 我是这样想的 我兴奋得不得了 |
| [04:10] | The whole extended family, all dressed in white, | 全家人都穿白色 |
| [04:13] | in a single-file line down the staircase. | 一字从上到下排开 |
| [04:15] | Oh, like a line on the highway. | 就像高速公路的汽车 |
| [04:17] | No. | 不是 |
| [04:18] | Or, uh, a ski jump. | 那跳台滑雪 |
| [04:20] | No. | 也不是 |
| [04:21] | Why- Why would I want a ski jump? | 我搞跳台滑雪干嘛 |
| [04:23] | I don’t know. | 不知道 |
| [04:23] | My idea was to have the whole family in a giant bed, | 我是想一家人在一张大床上 |
| [04:26] | like in Willy Wonka. | 就像威利·旺卡一样 |
| [04:27] | Yeah, but that’s ridiculous. | 那简直太”可笑”了 |
| [04:29] | “Ridiculicious.” | 应该是”可口” |
| [04:34] | I don’t see anything. | 我什么都没看到 |
| [04:35] | So I’m crazy? | 所以是我疯了吗 |
| [04:36] | No. You’re… not. | 不 你 没有 |
| [04:40] | Your father was supposed to fix that step. | 你爸早该把这个楼梯修好的 |
| [04:42] | Mom, you’re obsessing over the tiniest little thing- | 妈 你对这些小细节太挑剔了 |
| [04:45] | So you do see it, yeah. | 这么说你也看到了 |
| [04:47] | What is the big deal about this one picture? | 不就照张相嘛 有什么大不了的 |
| [04:50] | Honey, you know what, | 亲爱的 我跟你说 |
| [04:51] | I don’t expect you to understand, but- | 我不指望你能理解 但是 |
| [04:54] | All right, when you’re a mom, | 这样 等你以后当妈了 |
| [04:56] | everything goes by so quickly. | 会感到时光如白驹过隙 |
| [04:58] | In a minute, Luke’s gonna be shaving, | 要不了多久 卢克就开始刮胡子了 |
| [05:01] | and Alex is gonna be off at college, and you’re gonna be- | 艾丽克斯去上大学 你呢 |
| [05:06] | you’ll be doing something great. | 你会做一些了不起的事情 |
| [05:09] | I just wanna freeze this moment as it is right now. | 我就是想时间定格在这一刻 |
| [05:13] | – You know? – I do. | -能理解吧 -能 |
| [05:15] | I know I don’t show it, | 我知道我平时松松垮垮 |
| [05:16] | but this family’s still the most important thing- | 但是这个家庭对我来说很重 |
| [05:19] | Screw it. | 管它呢 |
| [05:20] | I’m gonna fix the bastard. | 我亲自来修 |
| [05:22] | I mean, seriously, how hard can it be? | 我倒要看看有多难 |
| [05:24] | If your father can do it, I can do it. Right? | 你老爸能行 那我也能行 对吧 |
| [05:26] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [05:27] | I just need to… | 我只需要 |
| [05:31] | lift- | 抬起来- |
| [05:34] | Oh, now I see it. | 现在我看见了 |
| [05:42] | These seats are amazing. | 我们的位置真棒 |
| [05:45] | Why you have candy coming out of your pocket? | 你口袋里怎么有糖漏出来 |
| [05:47] | No, no, no, no, no. | 不是不是不是 |
| [05:47] | – Huh? – I brought my own snacks. | -什么 -我自己带了零食 |
| [05:50] | Not because I’m cheap. It’s a matter of principle. | 不是我小气 这是原则问题 |
| [05:53] | Plus I get a little rush from the danger. | 再说冒着被人发现的危险其实挺刺激的 |
| [05:54] | Be cool. Be cool. | 淡定 装酷 |
| [05:55] | – What? – Be cool. Just look straight ahead. | -什么 -淡定 看前面 |
| [06:00] | I never felt more alive. Whoo! | 我感觉好极了 哦吼 |
| [06:05] | Okay, I just made it worse. I’m not freaking out though. | 我越搞越糟糕 但我没有惊惶失措 |
| [06:08] | I’m gonna call your dad, and he’s gonna tell me how to fix this. | 我打电话给你爸 问他怎么修 |
| [06:11] | – Oh, my God! It’s Dad. – Where? | -天啊 是老爸 -哪儿 |
| [06:12] | Right there, behind Kobe. | 那里 科比的后面 |
| [06:14] | – Oh, my god! – How weird is this! | -天啊 -真是太少见了 |
| [06:16] | Quick. Quick, tell me something to say that will freak him out. | 快点快点 想一件事情来吓他 |
| [06:18] | – Tell him I’m pregnant. – No, not gonna say that. | -说我怀孕了 -不 那个可不能乱说 |
| [06:22] | Okay, here we go. How funny is this! | 响了响了 真是太有趣了 |
| [06:28] | Hey, it’s Phil. You know what to do. | 你好 我是菲尔 有事请留言 |
| [06:33] | Well, that was pretty funny. | 真是”有趣”呀 |
| [06:42] | Oh, my God! | 天啊 |
| [06:45] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [06:48] | Oh, my God. Oh, my God. | 天啊 天啊 天啊 |
| [06:54] | Oh, my God. Oh, my God. | 天啊 天啊 |
| [07:00] | Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. | 天啊 天啊 天啊 |
| [07:03] | Oh, my God. Oh. | 天啊 噢 |
| [07:06] | It’s much better. Excuse me. Sorry. | 好多了 失陪一下 |
| [07:10] | Hello? | 喂 |
| [07:11] | There is a pigeon in our house. | 家里进来一只鸽子 |
| [07:12] | What do I do? What do I do? | 怎么办 怎么办 |
| [07:14] | Who is this? | 你谁呢 |
| [07:15] | – Never funny. Not funny now. – Calm down. | -不搞笑 一点都不搞笑 -冷静 |
| [07:17] | You know I grew up around many animals. | 我从小就是在动物的陪伴下长大的 |
| [07:19] | One time, a rooster attacked me, | 有一次一只公鸡袭击我 |
| [07:20] | and my mom wrung its neck, and we had it for dinner. | 我妈把它脖子拧了 然后晚上就吃鸡 |
| [07:22] | Great time for an anecdote. Help me. | 你真会挑时间讲故事 速回来救我 |
| [07:24] | It’s more afraid of you than you are of it. | 其实它更怕你 |
| [07:27] | Pigeons aren’t scared of anything. | 鸽子什么都不怕 |
| [07:28] | They stand on electrical wires. | 电线他们都敢站 |
| [07:30] | You’re gonna be fine, Mitchell. Just as long as you don’t- | 你会没事的 米奇尔 只要你不 |
| [07:33] | You know what, they’re starting. | 那个 他们要开始了 |
| [07:34] | I gotta go. Okay, bye. | 我得挂了 拜拜 |
| [07:36] | As long as I don’t what? Cam? | 只要我不怎么 小卡 |
| [07:38] | As long as I don’t- Oh, God! | 只要我不怎么 我的个娘亲 |
| [07:43] | Cool. The kiss cam. | 酷 接吻镜头来了 |
| [07:44] | Wouldn’t it be embarrassing if the camera | 如果镜头圈到了我们 |
| [07:46] | – was on us and then the crowd started- – We’re related. | -会不会很尴尬 -我们是亲戚 |
| [07:48] | Not by blood. | 但没有血缘关系 |
| [07:49] | Touch me and there will be blood. | 你敢碰我 就让你”血溅当场” |
| [07:55] | – Not us. – What’s wrong with you? | -我们不行 -你怎么了 |
| [07:57] | It’s the kiss cam. | 是接吻镜头 |
| [07:58] | When it lands on you, you’re supposed to kiss. | 要是圈到我们 我们就得接吻 |
| [08:03] | This is my wife’s dad’s second wife. | 她是我岳父的二婚妻子 |
| [08:05] | So legally okay, but still weird. | 法律上没问题 但是很怪异 |
| [08:10] | That was awkward. | 太尴尬了 |
| [08:13] | And we’re back. | 又是我们 |
| [08:17] | Oh. Ay! Come on. It’s not a big deal. | 来吧 又没什么大不了的 |
| [08:27] | Thank God for caller I.D. | 多亏了来电显示 |
| [08:28] | So you don’t have to talk to your wife. | 于是你不想接你老婆电话就可以挂掉 |
| [08:31] | Oh, we’re gonna talk, mister. | 看我回来收拾你 |
| [08:33] | We’re gonna talk and talk. | 我会慢慢慢慢说死你 |
| [08:38] | Dad, Mom saw you on TV. You’re dead. | 老爸 妈妈在电视上看到你了 你死定了 |
| [08:44] | Here’s the thing. The kiss cam is only supposed to be… | 是这样的 接吻镜头应该只针对 |
| [08:46] | for the enjoyment of the people at the game. | 现场观众娱乐一下的 |
| [08:49] | They never show that on TV. | 电视上根本不该播 |
| [08:51] | What people do in the privacy of their own sports arena… | 人们在自己的比赛场上做什么 |
| [08:55] | should be their own business. | 是他们的自由 |
| [08:57] | So in ’66, I worked in my grandfather’s office supply business- | 66年的时候我在我爷爷的办公品公司打工 |
| [09:02] | you know, your ink, your staples, your legal pads. | 就是墨水啊 订书钉啊 纸张之类的 |
| [09:05] | Am I going too fast for you? | 我说得太快了吗 |
| [09:07] | I fell asleep for a second. | 我听得都睡着了 |
| [09:08] | Did you do anything interesting in the ’60s? | 你在60年代就没做过有意思的事吗 |
| [09:11] | Well, one summer, | 有一个夏天 |
| [09:12] | I swept up hair at my other grandfather’s barbershop. | 我在姥爷的理发店里帮忙扫头发 |
| [09:14] | – You’re killing me. – What do you want? | -别折磨我了 -你想要什么样的故事 |
| [09:16] | I don’t know. | 我也不确定 |
| [09:17] | Brian Beckwith’s grandfather marched on Washington. | 布莱恩·贝壳维斯的爷爷当年在华盛顿游行过呢 |
| [09:20] | Artie Beckwith? | 阿蒂·贝壳维斯吗 |
| [09:21] | He couldn’t walk two feet without complaining. | 那个整天啰里吧嗦 怨天尤人的怂货 |
| [09:24] | He marched on Washington? | 他去华盛顿游行过 |
| [09:26] | He told Brian he did. | 他是这样告诉布莱恩的 |
| [09:27] | With Martin Luther King Jr. | 跟马丁·路德·金一起 |
| [09:29] | Martin Luther King? | 马丁·路德·金 |
| [09:31] | – Guess who cut his hair. – What? | -你以为他的理发师是谁 -什么 |
| [09:34] | Do you know who cut Martin Luther King Jr.’s hair? | 你知道马丁·路德·金的理发师是谁吗 |
| [09:37] | Neither does Luke’s teacher. | 卢克的老师怕是也不知道 |
| [09:39] | – So the barbershop was in Washington? – Okay. | -所以理发店是在华盛顿啊 -是的 |
| [09:43] | – Did you cut any other famous hair? – Oh, yeah. | -你还为其他名人理过发吗 -那当然 |
| [09:45] | The Kennedys, Richard Nixon, all the astronauts. | 肯尼迪家族 理查德·尼克松 各位宇航员 |
| [09:47] | How do you think Buzz Aldrin got his nickname? | 你以为巴斯·奥尔德的外号是哪来的 |
| [09:49] | Awesome. | 酷毙了 |
| [09:52] | *We love to play in Lily’s room* | *莉莉的屋里最好玩* |
| [09:54] | *We don’t need any milk* | *要不要牛奶无所谓* |
| [09:58] | Okay, you know what, Lily? I am a man. | 好了 莉莉 你老爸是铁血真汉子 |
| [10:00] | I am going into the kitchen to get your milk. | 爸这就去厨房给你拿牛奶 |
| [10:46] | *Ave Maria* | *万福玛利亚* |
| [10:57] | *Gratia plena* | *满被圣宠者* |
| [11:04] | *Maria, gratia plena* | *玛利亚 满被圣宠者* |
| [11:13] | *Maria, gratia plena* | *玛利亚 满被圣宠者* |
| [11:20] | *Ave, ave dominus* | *圣洁的天主* |
| [11:27] | *Dominus tecum* | *主与尔偕焉* |
| [11:32] | *Benedicta tu in mulieribus* | *女中尔为赞美* |
| [11:40] | *Et benedictus fructus ventris* | *尔胎子耶稣* |
| [11:48] | *Ventris tui, Jesus* | *并为赞美* |
| [12:00] | *Ave Maria* | *万福玛利亚* |
| [12:17] | Then one day, Wilt Chamberlain shows up. | 有一次 威尔特·张伯伦来光顾了 |
| [12:20] | He says, “Can you take a little off the top for my friend here?” | 他说”你能帮忙修下我朋友的头发吗” |
| [12:23] | – And it’s Elvis. – No way. | -竟然是猫王艾维斯 -不是吧 |
| [12:25] | Greatest singer that ever lived, after Sinatra. | 他是世上最了不起的歌手 除了西纳特拉 |
| [12:27] | I’ll fight any man who says different. | 谁敢反驳我就跟他急 |
| [12:29] | My dad says the greatest singer who ever lived is Peabo Bryson. | 我老爸说最棒的歌手是彼柏·布莱森 |
| [12:33] | Then I guess I gotta fight your dad. | 那我只好找你老爸算算账了 |
| [12:35] | Yeah, I guess. | 是吧 |
| [12:42] | Luke says Grandpa wants to fight you. | 卢克说外公要找你算账 |
| [12:54] | Why does everything have to suck? | 干嘛什么都跟我过不去 |
| [12:57] | Let’s just do the picture another day. | 我们还是改天照相吧 |
| [12:58] | I think I’m getting a pimple. | 我脸上马上要冒痘痘了 |
| [13:00] | No. | 不行 |
| [13:00] | Do you know how long it took me to book this photographer? | 你知道我多辛苦才约到那位摄影师吗 |
| [13:04] | Maybe by the fireplace. | 在壁炉那里照怎么样 |
| [13:07] | Yeah. That’s a classic old-person spot for a portrait. | 行啊 旧时代的老人都喜欢在那儿画塑像 |
| [13:11] | Yeah, if I’d ever bothered to paint that hideous wall. | 拉倒吧 墙的颜色太恶心了 |
| [13:13] | Claire is a perfectionist, which sometimes is a good thing, | 克莱尔是个完美主义者 这有时候是好事 |
| [13:17] | like when it comes to picking a husband. | 比如选个绝代老公什么的 |
| [13:20] | Sometimes it’s a bad thing, | 有时候就不太好了 |
| [13:21] | like when everyone else sees something beautiful… | 比如大家都觉得某样东西很不错 |
| [13:24] | and all she sees is the teeny-tiny flaw. | 而她的眼里就只有那些丁点大的瑕疵 |
| [13:29] | No. No. | 不行 坚决不行 |
| [13:32] | No. | 不行 |
| [13:33] | Hi. My house is a disaster. | 喂 我的房子遭殃了 |
| [13:36] | Can we do this picture at your place? | 能在你那里拍照吗 |
| [13:38] | Yeah, that’s- that’s not gonna work. | 这个 怕是不太可能了 |
| [13:42] | So- | 所以 |
| [13:50] | Maybe one more layer. And tight, really tight. | 再缠一圈吧 粘紧点 用点力 |
| [13:53] | – Dad, can you call them again? – I just did. | -爸 能再催催他们吗 -刚打过了 |
| [13:55] | They’re on their way. Game went into overtime. | 他们在路上了 比赛打进加时赛了 |
| [13:57] | I know, but we’re losing the light, | 我知道 但是太阳都快落山了 |
| [13:58] | and the photographer’s | 而且摄影师 |
| [13:59] | gotta get to a bar mitzvah in 10 minutes. | 10分钟后还要去个犹太男孩成人仪式 |
| [14:01] | Oh, red wine. Really? Now? | 红酒 现在 你不是吧 |
| [14:03] | You know, honey, | 亲爱的 |
| [14:03] | I think you’re getting a little too uptight about this. | 我觉得你有点太神经质了 |
| [14:06] | – It’s hard to breathe. – Oh, you’re fine. | -我呼吸困难了 -你没事的 |
| [14:08] | What’d you do to him? He’s turning blue. | 你把他怎么了 他脸都绿了 |
| [14:10] | But his clothes will stay white. | 只要他的衣服是白色的就行 |
| [14:13] | – We’re home! – Oh, thank God. | -我们回来咯 -谢天谢地 |
| [14:15] | Manny, let’s go change. | 曼尼 我们换衣服去 |
| [14:16] | Hey, there’s my beautiful wife. | 嘿 又看见我美丽的贤妻了 |
| [14:19] | I know you’re mad at me, | 我知道你生我的气 |
| [14:20] | and I know this foam finger can’t make up for everything. | 我也知道这泡沫手指无法弥补我的过错 |
| [14:22] | Honey, you just go change, | 亲爱的 你赶紧换衣服 |
| [14:23] | and we’ll talk about what you did later. | 那事儿我们回头再说 |
| [14:25] | Hey, thank you so much for those tickets. | 嘿 谢谢你买票给我们 |
| [14:27] | Gloria tells me you had a real good time. | 歌洛莉亚说你们玩得很开心 |
| [14:29] | Not really. No, I didn’t. | 没没 我可没有 |
| [14:30] | God, I love your daughter. | 上苍作证 我爱你女儿 |
| [14:32] | I should- I should come by | 我到时候再回来 |
| [14:34] | and kiss that step- fix that step. | 亲下这台阶 修好这台阶 |
| [14:36] | Oh, you’re acting like I wanted to destroy the house. | 你说的好像我是故意把家里弄得一团糟一样 |
| [14:39] | No. I just think it’s odd | 不 我只是觉得奇怪 |
| [14:40] | that the majority of things you destroyed… | 你毁掉的大部分东西 |
| [14:42] | were sent to us by my mom. | 都是我妈送给我们的 |
| [14:43] | Okay, okay, okay. | 好吧 好吧 |
| [14:44] | So while I’m fighting off that filthy creature, | 也就是说我和那臭脏鸟周旋的时候 |
| [14:46] | I actually stop and say, “Oh, you know what, | 还会有时间停下来想 哎呀真好 |
| [14:48] | here’s the opportunity I’ve always been looking for | 总算可以借机毁掉那些 |
| [14:50] | to destroy our kitschiest objects.” | 庸俗不堪的东西了 |
| [14:51] | Kitschiest? Oh, she’s gonna love that. | 庸俗不堪 她听到一定会很”开心”的 |
| [14:53] | If you would’ve come with me to the wedding, | 其实如果你跟着我去婚礼 |
| [14:54] | none of this would have happened. | 这一切都不会发生了 |
| [14:56] | Okay. So you are angry. | 你是真生气了啊 |
| [14:57] | Mitchell, I get it. | 米奇尔 我懂的 |
| [14:58] | You’re terrified of small talk and birds. | 你讨厌扯家常 还不喜欢鸟 |
| [15:00] | You’re just lucky that pigeon | 你一定很庆幸那小鸽子 |
| [15:01] | didn’t want to chat you up about the weather. | 没缠着你聊天气状况吧 |
| [15:03] | – Hello, Jay. – Hello, guys. | -你好 杰 -你们也好 |
| [15:06] | Oh, God. Oh, you look like the guy from Dance Fever. | 老天 你怎么穿得跟”舞迷”节目的选手似的 |
| [15:08] | Thank you. | 多谢夸奖 |
| [15:09] | Deney Terrio. Cleveland, Ohio. | 丹尼·特里奥 俄亥俄州克里夫兰市 |
| [15:11] | Dad, really? That is not a compliment. | 老爸 非要这样吗 我不是在夸你 |
| [15:13] | That’s why I wanted you to try those on earlier. Turn around. | 所以之前我才让你先穿上试试 转过去 |
| [15:16] | The picture can’t happen today. My pimple’s getting worse. | 今天不能拍照 我的痘痘越发明显了 |
| [15:18] | Oh, honey, I am so sorry. Can you stand? | 我可怜的小宝贝 你还能站着吗 |
| [15:21] | – Yeah. – Well, then the picture’s happening. | -能 -那就得拍 |
| [15:23] | It’s all anybody’s gonna see. | 大家一定会紧盯着我不放的 |
| [15:25] | I wouldn’t be so sure about that. | 我看可不一定 |
| [15:29] | Did you get a look at her dress? | 你看见她穿的裙子了吗 |
| [15:31] | What? Why would I look at her dress? I love you. | 什么 我看她裙子干嘛 我爱的是你 |
| [15:33] | Uh, Mrs. Dunphy, the sun is setting. | 邓菲太太 太阳就快下山了 |
| [15:36] | Okay. Yeah, this is happening. | 好的 这就拍 |
| [15:37] | Everybody, come on. Let’s go. | 大家 快来 我们出去了 |
| [15:39] | Be careful. I stained some furniture out there this afternoon. | 小心点 我下午才给家具刷了漆摆外边呢 |
| [15:41] | Of course you did, Dad. | 可不是嘛 老爸 |
| [15:43] | Anything else I need to know about? | 还有什么需要注意的吗 |
| [15:44] | Maybe the neighbors on either side are having a paintball fight. | 没准旁边邻居正忙着打彩弹呢 |
| [15:46] | Now watch this. Dad, in his infinite wisdom, | 都看好了 我那睿智无比的老爹 |
| [15:49] | stained furniture today. | 今天给家具刷了漆 |
| [15:50] | Don’t touch it. It’s wet. | 千万别碰着了 还没干呢 |
| [15:52] | – Hurry, hurry. – Put that down, sweetheart. | -快点快点 -别照了 亲爱的 |
| [15:54] | Okay. Okay, we got it. Now we’re gonna go out here. | 很好很好 大家都过来了 现在站这边 |
| [15:57] | Oh, my God! Are you kidding me? | 老天啊 你在耍我吗 |
| [16:00] | How do- How do you turn the sprinklers off? | 那洒水器怎么关 |
| [16:01] | Ay! Of course! Because I’m Latina, | 又问我 当然了 就因为我是拉丁人 |
| [16:04] | I’m supposed to know everything about gardening and sprinklers! | 我就该对花园 洒水器什么的了如指掌 |
| [16:06] | You were here when they installed it. | 他们装这东西的时候就你在 |
| [16:09] | Ay, yeah. The box is across the yard. | 是诶 控制器在草坪那边 |
| [16:12] | You mean your now-soaking-wet yard? | 你是说要跨过这片黄浦江吗 |
| [16:14] | That’s great. We are screwed. | 真好 彻底歇菜了 |
| [16:15] | No, we’re not. | 不 还没 |
| [16:17] | We haven’t unwrapped our secret weapon yet. | 我们还没出秘密武器呢 |
| [16:20] | Luke walks over there, Hurt Locker style… | 拆弹特工–卢克小神童过去 |
| [16:23] | flips the switch, | 关掉开关 |
| [16:25] | and boom- or not boom- water off. | 嘭 或者不嘭 水就关了 |
| [16:30] | Put the “he” in “hero,” son. | 好男儿志当英雄 儿子 |
| [16:39] | Hurt Locker? It’s more like Squirt Locker. | 拆弹专家 洒水器终结者还差不多 |
| [16:43] | Really? That wasn’t funny? | 不是吧 不搞笑吗 |
| [16:45] | I actually pity you guys. | 我真同情你们这群没幽默感的 |
| [16:52] | No time to celebrate! Stop it! | 没空庆祝了 都给我停 |
| [16:55] | – We don’t have a lot of time. – All right, everybody. | -我们时间不多了 -好的 大家 |
| [16:57] | – If I can have the little ones down front- – You know what, sir? | -请小个子的站前面 -先生 |
| [16:59] | If you don’t mind, I’ve got this. | 不介意的话 我来吧 |
| [17:00] | Come on, people, let’s get out here. | 大伙 都过来吧 |
| [17:02] | Haley, Alex, I need you to unwrap your brother. | 海莉 艾丽克斯 你们给弟弟拆胶带 |
| [17:04] | All right, I need the Dunphys over on this side. | 邓菲一家站这边 |
| [17:07] | Dad, you’re in the middle. | 爸爸 你站中间 |
| [17:08] | Mitchell, Cam, Lily on this end. Okay. | 米奇尔 小卡 莉莉站那边 |
| [17:13] | – Listen. – Uh-huh? | -听我说 -怎么 |
| [17:14] | Honey, I screwed up, but if ever you’re in my arms again- | 亲爱的 我错了 如果你再次投入我怀抱 |
| [17:18] | – Phil, not now. – Yes, now. | -菲尔 现在不说这些 -就得现在说 |
| [17:20] | I don’t want to look at this picture… | 我不想日后看到这张照片时 |
| [17:21] | when I’m 80 years old and you’re long dead… | 比如我80岁 而你早已与世长辞的时候 |
| [17:23] | and know that you were angry at me when we took it. | 还想到你拍照时心里深藏的怒气 |
| [17:25] | Phil, we’ll talk about what you did later. | 菲尔 回头再说行吗 |
| [17:26] | Okay, everybody. Eyes over here. | 好了 大家 请看这里 |
| [17:28] | I didn’t do anything. She kissed me. | 不关我的事 是她亲的我 |
| [17:31] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:32] | – Who kissed you? – Gloria. | -谁亲了你 -歌洛莉亚 |
| [17:34] | – What? – It was the kiss cam. | -什么 -是接吻镜头[同音:亲了小卡] |
| [17:37] | Why did you kiss Cam? | 你亲小卡做什么 |
| [17:38] | No, I kissed Phil. He told me I had to. | 不是 我亲了菲尔 他说必须那样 |
| [17:40] | – No, no. – Okay, hang on a second. | -不是这样的 -等一下 |
| [17:42] | Was this before or after | 这是在你无视 |
| [17:43] | you ignored the phone call from your wife? | 老婆电话之前还是之后 |
| [17:45] | You saw that too? | 那个你也看见了 |
| [17:47] | Could we please just take the damn picture? | 我们就不能先把相照了吗 |
| [17:50] | Okay. Everybody, one more time. | 好了 大伙 再来一次 |
| [17:53] | – Just so you know, I am angry with you. – I knew it! | -你知道吗 我很生你的气 -我就知道 |
| [17:55] | – Oh, damn it! – It was a big day for me, | -我靠 -今天对我来说很重要 |
| [17:58] | and he didn’t want to go because he doesn’t like small talk. | 而他不参加的原因是他不喜欢扯家常 |
| [18:00] | Would it be terribly inconvenient… | 把你们这些小吵小闹 |
| [18:01] | to just postpone this hissy fit for a few minutes? | 推迟那么几分钟就有那么难吗 |
| [18:04] | Ok, you know what? Maybe some of us don’t | 你知道吗 或许我们根本就 |
| [18:06] | – want to take a picture today. – Thank you. | -不想今天拍照 -多谢 |
| [18:07] | And please, Claire, | 拜托了 克莱尔 |
| [18:08] | don’t try to make Mitchell do something he doesn’t wanna do. | 别逼米奇尔做他不想做的事 |
| [18:10] | Oh, shut up, Cam. | 闭嘴吧 小卡 |
| [18:12] | Okay, stop it! Stop it! | 好了 别闹了 |
| [18:14] | Everyone, listen. This took me forever to put together, | 大家都听好了 我真的好不容易才筹划好 |
| [18:17] | so I don’t really care | 所以我真的不在乎 |
| [18:18] | who kissed who and who’s got a pimple on her head… | 谁亲了谁 谁额头上长了痘痘 |
| [18:21] | and who is wearing an outrageously inappropriate dress. | 或者谁穿了超级不得体的裙子 |
| [18:24] | We are gonna get together and act like a normal family… | 我们要打起精神 假装一切正常 |
| [18:28] | for one-tenth of a freaking second, | 持续十分之一秒就行 |
| [18:30] | and we’re gonna do it right now. | 现在就这么办 |
| [18:31] | – Come on, let’s go. – Get your hands off of me. | -快点 -别碰我 |
| [18:32] | No. No. Make me. Make me. | 就不 就不 你怎样 |
| [18:34] | Ah, this is ridiculous. You’re both uptight about everything. | 太荒唐了 你们两个对每件事都那么纠结 |
| [18:39] | You didn’t want to go to a wedding with him | 你不想陪他去参加婚礼 |
| [18:40] | because you didn’t want to make small talk? | 就因为不愿意和别人聊天是吗 |
| [18:42] | That’s how I met Gloria. | 我就是这样认识歌洛莉亚的 |
| [18:44] | Do you remember the first thing I said to you? | 还记得我对你说的第一句话吗 |
| [18:45] | Yes. “I like chocolate, | 记得 “我喜欢巧克力 |
| [18:47] | I like fruit, but not together.” | 我喜欢水果 但不喜欢两样加在一起” |
| [18:50] | You couldn’t come up with that, lvy League? And you. | 常青藤高材生 你忍不了是吗 还有你 |
| [18:53] | You would be a lot happier if you weren’t | 你要是不那么完美主义 |
| [18:55] | so obsessed with everything being perfect. | 就会活得开心得多 |
| [18:57] | Look at us here all in white. What are we, a cricket team? | 瞧瞧我们一身白 什么东西 板球队吗 |
| [18:59] | News flash. Life is not perfect, Claire. | 告诉你吧 生活本就不完美 克莱尔 |
| [19:03] | Now calm the hell down. | 现在都给我冷静下来 |
| [19:05] | Okay, Dad, that’s great, and that’s really easy for you to say. | 好吧老爸 很好 对你来说当然轻松 |
| [19:08] | But do you think I like being like this? | 但你以为是我想这样吗 |
| [19:11] | No, I don’t. | 并非如此 |
| [19:12] | So if you have some quick-and-easy fix, | 所以如果你有什么良方 |
| [19:13] | why don’t you just give it to me right now? | 何不现在就说来听听 |
| [19:22] | – Jay! – Oh, my God. | -杰 -我的老天 |
| [19:24] | I- I got this, baby. | 看我的 宝贝 |
| [19:28] | No. What did- What did you do? | 不 你干 你干什么 |
| [19:30] | Now two people are dirty. | 现在两个人都弄脏了 |
| [19:32] | Well, three. | 三个 |
| [19:33] | Okay, you know what? | 好吧 你自找的 |
| [19:36] | That’s for “Kitschy.” | 谁叫你说”庸俗不堪” |
| [19:37] | Mud fight! | 泥巴大战 |
| [19:39] | No. Don’t do that. No, no, no! Stop it! | 别这样 别别 停下 |
| [19:43] | Everybody get back in line. Come on, guys, stop. | 大家都站好 都听话 别闹了 |
| [19:49] | Damn it. Damn it! Guys! | 可恶 你们 |
| [19:52] | Excuse me. | 不好意思 |
| [19:54] | Are we still doing this? | 你们到底拍不拍了 |
| [19:56] | No. No, we’re not. | 不 不拍了 |
| [20:05] | – Now we are. – We’re ready! | -现在拍吧 -准备好咯 |
| [20:13] | – Say “cheese.” – Say “cheese”! | -说”茄子” -“茄子” |
| [20:16] | Back in ’68, when I was sweeping up hair in that barbershop, | 68年我在理发店扫头发的时候 |
| [20:19] | I had this mental picture of the family that, | 我曾幻想今后自己家庭的样子 |
| [20:22] | if I was lucky enough, | 如果够走运的话 |
| [20:23] | one day I would end up with- perfect wife, perfect kids. | 有一天我会坐拥完美的妻子 完美的孩子 |
| [20:27] | Guess what. I didn’t get any of that. | 结果呢 我没那运气 |
| [20:29] | Wound up with this sorry bunch. | 最后捞到这么一群二货 |
| [20:32] | And I’m thankful for that every day. | 可我每天都对此充满感激 |
| [20:35] | Well, most days. | 大部分时候吧 |
| [20:37] | I think I’m just gonna go with the Elvis stuff. | 我还是就提猫王艾维斯的事好了 |
| [20:40] | Yeah. I would. | 换我也会 |
| [20:45] | Uh, to the right. To the right. | 右边点 右边点 |
| [20:48] | A skosh to the left. | 稍微往左一点点 |
| [20:50] | There we go. | 对了 |
| [20:52] | Whatever. I’m gonna have to take the picture down | 不管了 反正重刷墙壁的时候 |
| [20:54] | when I repaint the wall anyhow. | 还是得把这幅照片取下来的 |
| [20:56] | – Kill me now. – What? | -杀了我吧 -什么 |
| [20:59] | Don’t know how I got so lucky. | 我真是太幸运了 |
| [21:03] | I love you. | 爱你 |
| [21:05] | – I love that picture. – Yeah. | -我喜欢这张照片 -是啊 |
| [21:11] | – Is that a chip on the frame right there? – No. No. | -相框那里是有个缺口吗 -没有没有 |
| [21:13] | – I can see it. – Honey. | -我看得到 -亲爱的 |