| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Oh my God, that’s so freaking funny. | 天啊 真是笑死我了 |
| [00:05] | I know, right? | 那是 我写的嘛 |
| [00:07] | What? | 你们在笑啥 |
| [00:07] | Dad just wrote another classic one. Tell her. | 老爸又出品经典之作 给她讲讲 |
| [00:10] | I don’t know about “Classic,” but here we go. | “经典”可不敢当 不过笑话是这样的 |
| [00:13] | “If you’re looking for a two-story house,” | “如果您想买一幢双层小楼” |
| [00:15] | “I’m your man.” | “那可真找对人了” |
| [00:16] | “I’ll tell you one story before you buy it” | “我会在您付款之前讲第一个故事” |
| [00:19] | “and then another story after.” | “付款之后再讲一个” |
| [00:23] | No, you didn’t! | 哈哈 太经典了 |
| [00:27] | Tonight is the S.C.A.R.B.. | 今晚是S.C.A.R.B.之夜 |
| [00:29] | The Southern California Annual Realtor’s Banquet. | 南加州房产经纪人年度宴会 |
| [00:32] | I think they know what it is. | 我猜他们应该知道这个吧 |
| [00:34] | It’s the mother of all | 这可是其他所有 |
| [00:35] | residential-real-estate banquets. | 住宅地产类宴会的鼻祖 |
| [00:38] | Now, for the last five years, Gil Thorpe has hosted, | 过去五年来 这宴会都是吉尔·索普在主持 |
| [00:40] | but as luck would have it, | 但凑巧的是 |
| [00:42] | he’s having a sketchy-looking polyp remove. | 他最近在做一个很恶心的息肉切除手术 |
| [00:44] | So they’ve asked me to…”Phil in.” | 所以他们就来找我说 “菲尔上” |
| [00:50] | – See what I did? – Oh, yeah. | -你听出笑点没 -当然 |
| [00:52] | “Phil.” | “菲尔[同音词Fill]” |
| [00:53] | You think I should open with that? | 我可以用这个作开场白吗 |
| [00:53] | You betcha. You should. | 当然了 这还用问吗 |
| [00:57] | Phil is gonna bomb. | 菲尔一定会颜面扫地 |
| [00:58] | It’s not that he’s not fun. He is so fun. | 不是说他不幽默 他很自娱自乐 |
| [01:01] | He’s just not funny. | 只是他的笑话都太冷了 |
| [01:03] | It’s probably my fault, | 在这一点上我也有责任 |
| [01:04] | because I laugh at all of his jokes. | 因为他开口 我必笑 |
| [01:06] | With my mouth not with my eyes. | 皮笑肉不笑 |
| [01:11] | “I see the great realtor Margaret Wilson is here,” | “我看到优秀的房产经纪人玛格丽特·威尔逊来了” |
| [01:14] | “looking more curvaceous than ever.” | “看上去比以往更加丰满迷人” |
| [01:17] | “Talk about your balloon payments.” | “说你那一屁股的债呢” |
| [01:25] | Gloria, do we have to keep | 歌洛莉亚 我们一定要留着这盘 |
| [01:27] | this Colombia/Brazil soccer game? | 哥伦比亚对战巴西的足球赛录像带吗 |
| [01:29] | Yes, I haven’t seen it yet. | 是滴 我一直都没看完这场 |
| [01:31] | It’s been sitting in there for five months. | 这录像已经录好五个月了 |
| [01:32] | I mean, I can tell you who wins. | 我是说 我可以告诉你谁赢了 |
| [01:35] | And what about this two-hour | 那这盘两个小时的 |
| [01:36] | “Antiques roadshow”? | 《古董路演》节目录像带又是怎么回事 |
| [01:37] | I’ll watch it today. | 我今天想把它看掉 |
| [01:38] | Fine. I’m gonna play some golf. | 好吧 那我要去打高尔夫了 |
| [01:40] | No. What about Mirabel’s daughter’s Quinceanera? | 不行 你还要参加米拉贝尔的女儿的成年礼呢 |
| [01:44] | I honestly didn’t get any of that. | 完全不知道你在讲神马 |
| [01:46] | Mirabel. She works for you. | 米拉贝尔是你的员工 |
| [01:48] | Okay. | 好吧 然后呢 |
| [01:50] | Her daughter, Rosalba, is celebrating her Quinceanera, | 她女儿罗莎芭 今晚要举行成人礼 |
| [01:53] | her 15th birthday. | 这是她的十五岁生日 |
| [01:54] | She invited us. You just going to ignore it. | 她邀请了咱俩 但你完全无视了 |
| [01:57] | Of course not. I get this all the time. | 我才没有 我一直都记得这码事 |
| [01:59] | I throw it on my secretary’s desk, | 我把这事丢给我秘书了 |
| [02:00] | and she sends them an Omaha steak. | 她给了他们一份奥马哈牛排当礼物 |
| [02:03] | – Ay, Jay. – What?! | -唉 杰 -咋了 |
| [02:06] | Manny’s right. | 曼尼说得对 |
| [02:07] | The Quinceanera is very important in the Latin Culture. | 女孩的成年礼在拉丁文化中是灰常重要滴 |
| [02:11] | The moment the father dances with his little princess. | 作父亲的要带着他的小公主翩翩起舞 |
| [02:15] | Ay, I remember my own father holding my hand. | 我还记得我爸爸拉着我滴手跳舞的时候 |
| [02:19] | There wasn’t a dry eye in the cartel. | 在场滴人无不内牛满面 |
| [02:22] | But these people don’t want me there. | 但那些人不会欢迎我去参加的 |
| [02:23] | See, they’re just being polite. | 明白吗 他们只是客气一下 |
| [02:25] | I’m the boss. | 我是他们的头儿 |
| [02:26] | That’s what you tell yourself | 你这是自欺欺人 |
| [02:27] | so you can stay above them. | 你就是骑在人民头上作威作福 |
| [02:29] | You just throw them an “Obama” Steak | 你就扔给他们一个什么”奥巴马”牛排 |
| [02:31] | and run to the golf course. | 然后就打你的高尔夫去了 |
| [02:33] | I’m not trying to stay above them. | 我可没有高高在上 |
| [02:34] | I just don’t think | 我只是不想 |
| [02:35] | I have to go all “arriba, arriba” with them. | 去他们那什么”叽里呱啦”的事儿里凑热闹 |
| [02:37] | – Because you’re better than them? – No, of course not. | -因为你比他们都强 -当然不是 |
| [02:39] | I mean, I’m better than some of them. | 我是说 我只比其中一些人强点而已 |
| [02:41] | Do you even know these people, Jay, hmm? | 乃根本都不认识这些人 对不对杰 |
| [02:43] | Or they’re just the backs you step on? | 还是说他们根本就只是乃的垫脚石 |
| [02:45] | I know you like to make me out as an elitist, | 我知道你不肯承认我是一枚杰出人士 |
| [02:48] | but the truth is, I’m close with these people. | 但事实上 我相当亲民 |
| [02:50] | Then prove it. Just go to the party. | 那就去参加成人礼 证明给我看 |
| [02:53] | Fine. One hour. You drive. | 好吧 只去一个小时 你来开车 |
| [02:55] | ‘Cause I don’t want to give my valet ticket to the wrong guy, | 因为我怕把泊车卡给错人 |
| [02:57] | have you all over me. | 这样你就又能唠叨我了 |
| [02:59] | Ay, Jay. | 唉 杰 |
| [03:00] | Where do you keep popping out from?! | 你到底都是从哪儿钻出来的 |
| [03:03] | So, Cam has started working out again, | 小卡现在又开始健身了 |
| [03:06] | which is — it’s — it’s great. | 这是 这真的是件好事 |
| [03:08] | He’s feeling good about himself, | 瘦身可以让他自我感觉更加良好 |
| [03:10] | and I want him to be healthy, | 而我只想让他健健康康的 |
| [03:11] | So it is all good. | 所以这本来是天大的好事 |
| [03:13] | Except for one thing. | 只可惜有一件事 |
| [03:14] | Knock, knock. | 当当当 |
| [03:15] | Look who’s there. | 看看谁来了 |
| [03:19] | Maybe there’s a person in this world | 或许世界上真的有人 |
| [03:21] | who looks good in bike shorts. | 能把单车热裤穿得好看 |
| [03:23] | But my boyfriend is not that person. | 但我男人肯定不是其中之一 |
| [03:25] | And I-I can’t tell him because he gets incredibly sensitive | 可我不能告诉他 因为但凡影射到他体型 |
| [03:30] | about even the tiniest comment concerning his physique. | 哪怕最不经意的一句话都能让他飙从中来 |
| [03:33] | Hey, I think I’m gonna take this spin class tomorrow morning. | 嘿 我明天早上想去上一节动感单车课 |
| [03:36] | Oh, sure. | 哦 去吧 |
| [03:38] | Oh, I get it. Message received. | 哦 好吧 我明白你的意思了 |
| [03:48] | I didn’t say anything! | 我啥也没说啊 |
| [04:09] | Okay, can’t you just run like a normal person? | 拜托 你就不能像正常人一样跑跑步吗 |
| [04:11] | What? It’s troga. | 你说啥 我在做跑珈 |
| [04:12] | It’s what? | 这是啥 |
| [04:14] | You never heard of troga? | 你连”跑珈”都木有听过 |
| [04:15] | I hate it when you do that. | 我真的很讨厌你这种口气 |
| [04:16] | What? | 啥口气 |
| [04:17] | “You’ve never heard of troga?” | “你连跑珈都不知道吗” |
| [04:19] | “You never tried octopus?” | “你连章鱼都没尝过吗” |
| [04:20] | “You never did this amazing thing” | “你就连那么有趣的事都不知道吗” |
| [04:22] | “I just discovered yesterday | “我也是昨天才知道 |
| [04:23] | but I pretend like I’ve done my whole life?” | 但非得装成自己像是一出生就知道一样” |
| [04:26] | So, troga is treadmill yoga. | 总之 “跑珈”是指在跑步机上做瑜伽 |
| [04:28] | It’s de rigueur. | 这可是社交之中必备的哦 |
| [04:30] | It’s de-dorky. | 我看是蠢蛋社交必备吧 |
| [04:32] | What is your deal today? | 你今天吃火药了 |
| [04:35] | I’m sorry. Phil is hosting that thing tonight, | 不好意思 菲尔今晚要去主持宴会 |
| [04:37] | and — and he’s been writing jokes. | 他现在正憋在家里写段子呢 |
| [04:39] | Ooh, yikes. | 哎呀 |
| [04:40] | I know. | 我就知道 |
| [04:41] | And I’m worried he’s gonna humiliateself | 我真的很担心 |
| [04:43] | in front of all those important people. | 他会在那些大人物面前丢脸 |
| [04:44] | I can’t say anything because — | 可是我又不能跟他直说 |
| [04:45] | No, no. I get it. I get it. I get it. | 不用讲了 我了解了 |
| [04:47] | Because it would hurt him even more coming from you. | 因为你的打击会令他倍感沮丧 |
| [04:49] | You know, I’m kind of going through something similar | 其实 我和小卡现在的处境 |
| [04:51] | with Cam right now. | 跟你俩的有点像 |
| [04:52] | – Why? – He’s started exercising again. | -你们咋了 -他又开始健身了 |
| [04:54] | Well, that’s good for him. | 这是好事呀 |
| [04:55] | Yeah. He’s wearing bike shorts. | 没错 但他一直穿着单车热裤健身 |
| [04:58] | That’s bad for you. | 你肯定很郁闷 |
| [04:59] | And I’m the last person who can say anything, | 而我又是最不能跟他说实话的那个人 |
| [05:01] | – because he’s… – Yeah. | -因为他实在 -我懂 |
| [05:02] | Okay, wait. No, no. All right. | 诶 等等 不是 我有主意了 |
| [05:04] | You know the movie “Strangers On A Train”? | 你看过电影《火车怪客》吗 |
| [05:06] | Hm, I never saw it. | 呃 我没看过 |
| [05:07] | You’ve never seen “Strangers On A –“ | 你连《火车怪客》都没… |
| [05:08] | I’m sorry. Great film. | 我错了 牛片 |
| [05:10] | But it’s these guys | 片中有两个人 |
| [05:12] | who both discover that they want someone out of their lives. | 都想杀死自己身边的某人 |
| [05:14] | So one of the guys proposes the perfect crime. | 然后其中一个人想了一个完美的杀人计划 |
| [05:17] | They will do each other’s murders. | 他们去替对方杀人 |
| [05:20] | We should do that. | 我们也应该这样做 |
| [05:21] | All right, | 好吧 你是说 |
| [05:22] | so I would tell Cam to lose the bike shorts? | 由我来告诉小卡丢掉那条蠢裤子 |
| [05:25] | Keeping me out of it. | 假装跟我无关 |
| [05:26] | And I tell Phil to lose the jokes. | 我去弄停菲尔的笑话 |
| [05:28] | I like it. I’m in. | 我喜欢这主意 我加入 |
| [05:30] | – All right!- I am in! | -太好了 -我加入 |
| [05:32] | Hey, Mackenzie. Stop it. It’s Alex. | 嘿 麦肯齐 等等 我是艾丽克斯 |
| [05:34] | Hey, so I was thinking later we’d — | 我想我们等会 |
| [05:35] | Oh, no. Whatever you want. | 不用 你想怎样都行 |
| [05:37] | Call me later! | 等会儿打给我 |
| [05:37] | Or I’ll call you later, or — | 或者我等会打给你 或者 |
| [05:41] | So, who’s Mackenzie? | 麦肯齐是谁 |
| [05:43] | You don’t know her. | 你不认识她 |
| [05:45] | Oh, I know Mackenzie. | 我当然知道麦肯齐 |
| [05:47] | Cute. Popular. | 漂亮 受人欢迎 |
| [05:49] | I am Mackenzie. | 我就是麦肯齐 |
| [05:50] | I invented Mackenzie. | 我简直就是麦肯齐的鼻祖 |
| [05:51] | And the way she’s making my sister run around… | 而她把我妹耍的团团转的样子 |
| [05:55] | It’s — it’s kind of funny, but… | 还真蛮好玩的 不过 |
| [05:58] | I can’t have it. It’s bad for the family. | 我受不了 家人为重 |
| [06:06] | What are you doing? I was about to call — | 你干嘛呢 我正要打电话给 |
| [06:07] | Mackenzie? Yeah, I know. | 麦肯齐 我知道 |
| [06:09] | Now shut up and let me help you. | 现在闭上你的嘴 让我来帮你 |
| [06:11] | The world is divided into two groups — | 这个世界有两种人 |
| [06:13] | cool girls and girls like you. | 酷女孩儿和像你这样的女孩儿 |
| [06:15] | And you have been given a rare opportunity | 而你正有一个千载难逢的机会 |
| [06:17] | to move from the former to the latter. | 能够从前者变为后者 |
| [06:19] | The latter to the former. | 是从后者变为前者吧 |
| [06:20] | Whatever. Oh, my god. You’re such a geek. | 管它呢 天啊 你还真够二的 |
| [06:22] | Now, do you want to be smart, or do you want to be popular? | 你现在是想要聪明还是要受人欢迎 |
| [06:27] | I think I want to be popular. | 我想要受人欢迎 |
| [06:29] | Of course you do. | 你当然想啦 |
| [06:30] | You just can’t be so obvious about it. | 但你不能表现的太明显 |
| [06:32] | You’ve given Mackenzie way too much power, | 你给麦肯齐太多主动权了 |
| [06:35] | and you need to take some of that power back. | 你自己得拽起来 |
| [06:38] | It’s her. | 是她的 |
| [06:39] | Give me the phone. | 把电话给我 |
| [06:40] | Here’s what you’re gonna say — | 你就这么说 |
| [06:41] | “Hey, Mackenzie. I’m busy. Call me back later.” | 麦肯齐 我很忙 等会儿你再打来 |
| [06:43] | – Then you hang up.- No way! | -然后你就挂断 -绝对不行 |
| [06:46] | Then you’re not getting the phone back. | 那你就再也拿不回这手机了 |
| [06:48] | Just give it to me. | 把它给我 |
| [06:49] | “Hey, Mackenzie. I’m busy. | 麦肯齐 我很忙 |
| [06:50] | Call me back later.” Then you hang up. | 等会儿你再打来 然后你就挂断 |
| [06:51] | – I can’t. – Do it. | -我做不到 -就这么做 |
| [06:52] | – No! – Do it! | -不行 – 就这么做 |
| [06:53] | Okay! Damn you. | 好吧 去你的 |
| [06:57] | Hey, Mackenzie. I’m busy. Call me back later. | 麦肯齐 我很忙 等会儿你再打来 |
| [07:03] | That was hard. | 太难了 |
| [07:05] | If it was easy, everyone would be popular. | 要是容易的话 谁都能受人欢迎了 |
| [07:13] | Knock knock! | 有人敲门啦 |
| [07:13] | Come on in! It’s open! | 进来吧 门没关 |
| [07:17] | I just wanted to drop off these old baby clothes for Lily. | 我带了些旧的童装来给莉莉 |
| [07:20] | Oh, that’s right. You’re so sweet. | 好的 你人太好了 |
| [07:22] | I hope I didn’t come at a bad time. | 我希望自己来的别不是时候 |
| [07:23] | Not at all. | 一点也不 |
| [07:24] | I was just deciding where to take Lily for our bike ride — | 我正考虑要带莉莉去哪儿骑车呢 |
| [07:27] | The lake or the park. | 湖边还是公园 |
| [07:28] | I’m leaning towards the park. | 我比较倾向于去公园 |
| [07:31] | I can see that. | 我看得出来 |
| [07:33] | You didn’t have to do that. | 你太客气了 |
| [07:35] | You guys are a touch old class. | 你们还真是传统 |
| [07:39] | – Well, it is a big night for you, so. – French. | -今晚对你很重要 -法国红酒 |
| [07:42] | Those guys. | 这些家伙啊 |
| [07:43] | So, have you given any thought to what you might say? | 那你想好要说什么了吗 |
| [07:46] | Oh, actually, I’m trying not to think about my act right now. | 事实上 我现在正努力不让自己想这事 |
| [07:48] | I’m kind of fighting the old butterflies, to be honest. | 说实话 我内心有点挣扎 |
| [07:50] | That’s normal. | 很正常 |
| [07:52] | I hear The Jonas Brothers get scared before every concert. | 我听说乔纳斯兄弟在每次演出前都会害怕 |
| [07:55] | Not Kevin? The guy’s a rock. | 凯文不会的吧 那家伙可牛叉了 |
| [07:58] | Especially Kevin. | 尤其是凯文 |
| [08:01] | I can’t believe I ever bought this for Alex. | 我真不敢相信我居然给艾丽克斯买过这个 |
| [08:03] | I wish somebody had said something. | 我真希望当时有人能说点什么 |
| [08:04] | Oh, come on. That was probably cute 10 years ago. | 别这样啦 这衣服十年前可能很可爱呢 |
| [08:07] | No, no. It never was. | 不 不 从来没有 |
| [08:09] | And you know — | 你知道的 |
| [08:09] | I’m the exact same way about my clothes. | 我的衣服也是这样 |
| [08:11] | Most of the time, great. | 大多数时候 很不错 |
| [08:13] | But every now and again, there’s that one outfit. | 不过时不时的就会有那么一件例外 |
| [08:15] | I just wish somebody would be honest with me and say, | 我真希望当时有人能对我实话实说 |
| [08:19] | “What you’re wearing is inappropriate.” | 你的穿着实在是雷人哇 |
| [08:23] | Do you know what I mean? | 你懂我意思吗 |
| [08:25] | I think I do, Claire. | 我懂 克莱尔 |
| [08:27] | I think I do. | 我懂 |
| [08:28] | And my answer is yes. | 我的回答是没问题 |
| [08:30] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [08:30] | I would love to dress you. | 我愿意给你打扮 |
| [08:32] | No, it — I don’t want you to dress me. | 不 我不想要你来帮我打扮 |
| [08:35] | No. | 不用 |
| [08:36] | And…I owe it to you to be honest, | 我觉得我该对你坦白 |
| [08:38] | so I’m just gonna say | 所以我要说 |
| [08:39] | that you need to lose the bicycle shorts. | 你得丢掉这条单车短裤 |
| [08:44] | Excuse me? | 你说什么 |
| [08:44] | They’re not working for you, Cam. | 小卡 它不适合你 |
| [08:47] | Please don’t take this personally. | 我不是在针对你 |
| [08:48] | I mean, nobody looks good in bike shorts. | 我是说 没人穿单车短裤好看的 |
| [08:51] | I just — I feel that I owe it to you to be honest. | 我只是 我觉得我应该对你坦白 |
| [08:54] | So, we’re good, right? | 这么说 我们还是好朋友 对吧 |
| [08:56] | – We’re great. – We’re great. | -我们非常要好 -我们非常要好 |
| [08:57] | – We’re great. – Oh, great. | -我们非常要好 -太好了 |
| [08:58] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [09:01] | You should probably just show yourself out. | 或许你应该穿自己的衣 让别人去说吧 |
| [09:03] | I hear — I hear some crying down the hallway. | 我听见 我听见走廊上有哭声 |
| [09:05] | Look at that. That’s a good dad. | 瞧 真是个好父亲 |
| [09:07] | Because you’ve got a baby, | 因为有了孩子 |
| [09:07] | and you hear every little sound. | 所以一丁点儿小的声音你都能听到 |
| [09:09] | I wouldn’t have — I wouldn’t have even noticed… | 要是我的话 我根本就不会注意到 |
| [09:12] | crying. | 有哭声 |
| [09:17] | Uh, okay. All right. | 好了 |
| [09:18] | All you need to know about this one | 你们需要知道的是 |
| [09:20] | is that Skip Woosnum is a well-known realtor | 斯基普·乌森是个著名的房产经纪人 |
| [09:23] | and he’s old. | 而且很老了 |
| [09:24] | Got it. | 收到 |
| [09:24] | Skip Woosnum. Realtor. Old. | 斯基普·乌森 房产经纪人 老的 |
| [09:27] | Here we go. | 开始了 |
| [09:28] | I’m not saying realtor Skip Woosnum is old, | 我不是要说斯基普·乌森已经老了 |
| [09:31] | but the first property he ever sold… | 不过他卖出去的第一件物业 |
| [09:34] | was a cave. | 居然是个洞穴 |
| [09:38] | You’re not, uh… | 你没有 |
| [09:39] | not laughing. | 没有笑 |
| [09:41] | Why aren’t you laughing, uncle Mitchell? | 你怎么不笑 米奇尔叔叔 |
| [09:42] | ’cause he doesn’t think it’s funny, | 因为他觉得不好笑 |
| [09:43] | or maybe — maybe you don’t think I’m funny. | 或者可能你觉得我并不搞笑 |
| [09:45] | Is that what you’re saying, Mitch? | 你是要说这些吗 米奇 |
| [09:45] | No, it’s… | 不是 |
| [09:51] | I just got it! | 我懂了 我懂了 |
| [09:52] | Oh. Cave! | 洞穴 |
| [09:56] | – That one’s kind of a thinker. – Yes! | -这个是需要点脑力 -没错没错 |
| [10:04] | There he is. | 他也来了 |
| [10:06] | All right, now. | 好了 |
| [10:07] | Knock it off, Jay. | 少来了 杰 |
| [10:08] | You don’t know anyone’s name here. | 这儿你一个人的名字都叫不出来 |
| [10:09] | Are you kidding me? | 你开什么玩笑 |
| [10:10] | Carlos! | 卡洛斯 |
| [10:15] | Lucky guess. | 运气不错 |
| [10:16] | I’m lucky only one turned around. | 还好只有一个人回头 |
| [10:19] | Listen — I need a favor. | 听着 我需要帮助 |
| [10:21] | I overestimated the number of people I know at this party. | 我高估了这个派对上我认识的人数 |
| [10:24] | So you go around, introduce yourself, | 你去到处转转 做做自我介绍 |
| [10:27] | and I’ll hear the names. | 我就在旁边偷听他们叫什么 |
| [10:29] | You realize you’re asking me | 你知道你是在叫我 |
| [10:30] | to help prove my own mother wrong. | 帮你证明我亲妈是错的 |
| [10:31] | I’ll pay two bucks per introduction. | 你每介绍一次 我就给你两美金 |
| [10:34] | All right, well, that’s Ramona. | 好吧 那是拉蒙纳 |
| [10:35] | She’s crazy for bingo. | 她狂爱饮烈酒 |
| [10:36] | Ramona. | 拉蒙纳 |
| [10:54] | Gloria! | 歌洛莉亚 |
| [10:55] | Stop being such a snob. | 别那么不合群了 |
| [10:57] | Come over and meet my friend Julio and his wife — | 过来见见我的朋友夏利奥和他的太太 |
| [10:59] | uh, I’m sorry. Your name again? | 对不起 你说你叫什么 |
| [11:01] | Kay? | 凯 |
| [11:02] | I think you’re really gonna hit it off with Kay! | 我觉得你跟凯会很合得来的 |
| [11:09] | I mean, she’s gonna tell me how to dress?! | 我是说 她要教我怎么打扮吗 |
| [11:11] | She ought to stick to things she knows more about, | 她应该干点她更擅长的 |
| [11:13] | like overcooking salmon. | 像是怎么把三文鱼烤焦 |
| [11:14] | Okay, wait. | 好吧 等等 |
| [11:15] | So, she actually said | 那么 她真的跟你说 |
| [11:16] | that you don’t look good in bicycle shorts? | 你穿单车裤不好看吗 |
| [11:18] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [11:19] | “You don’t look good in bicycle shorts”. | 你穿单车裤不好看 |
| [11:23] | Madness. | 疯了 |
| [11:25] | Oh, and here she is. | 是她 |
| [11:26] | Okay, you know what? I can’t be here. | 好吧 我不能在这待着了 |
| [11:28] | I’m — I’m going out for some air. | 我要 我要出去透透气 |
| [11:30] | Yes. Yes, go. This — this could get ugly. | 好的 去吧 我也许会跟她吵起来 |
| [11:33] | Hello, Claire. | 你好 克莱尔 |
| [11:34] | You are a gutless weasel. | 你这个没种的家伙 |
| [11:37] | Oh, yeah. No. | 是的 不 |
| [11:38] | I heard what you said to my boyfriend. | 我知道你跟我男人说了什么 |
| [11:39] | You told Phil he was hysterical! | 你跟菲尔说他超搞笑的 |
| [11:41] | You said he was this generation’s Richard Pryor! | 你说他是新一代的理查德·普赖尔 |
| [11:44] | Well, I am not the one that you need to apologize to. | 你该道歉的人不是我 |
| [11:48] | What are you babbling about? You owe me a murder. | 你在胡说什么 你欠我一个谋杀 |
| [11:52] | Okay, Claire, I c — I couldn’t do it. | 好吧 克莱尔 我做不来 |
| [11:53] | I couldn’t crush Phil’s dreams. | 我没办法打破菲尔的美梦 |
| [11:55] | We had a deal. I told Cam about the bike shorts. | 我们说好了的 我跟小卡说单车裤的事 |
| [11:58] | No! No! | 不 不 |
| [12:00] | The deal was to get Cam to take off the bike shorts. | 我们说好的是 你让小卡脱掉那条热裤 |
| [12:02] | But guess what — he is still in the stupid bike shorts. | 可结果呢 他还穿着那条愚蠢的单车热裤 |
| [12:05] | Can I call you back? | 我待会打回给你好吗 |
| [12:07] | Turns out Cam was here the whole time, | 小卡原来一直都在 |
| [12:09] | and he just heard everything I said. | 他听到了我说的话 |
| [12:10] | Ooh. Did he just run into the bedroom and cry? | 他跑到卧室里哭去了吗 |
| [12:12] | Oh, yes, ’cause that’s what all gay men do. | 是啊 你以为所有基佬都这样吗 |
| [12:14] | We all dissolve into — | 我们都如此软弱 |
| [12:17] | Yes. That is what he did. | 好吧 他还真就这么做了 |
| [12:24] | There are challenging moments in every marriage. | 每段婚姻都有一些挑战 |
| [12:26] | Um…having to tell your husband that he’s not funny | 为了你丈夫不在众人面前出丑 |
| [12:30] | so that he won’t humiliate himself | 而必须告诉他 他其实一点也不搞笑 |
| [12:31] | has to be one of the toughest. | 这绝对是最难的挑战之一了 |
| [12:38] | So I went a different way. | 于是我就换了种方式 |
| [12:41] | Stop talking. | 别再说了 |
| [12:42] | I just need some time for this wound to become a scar. | 我只是需要时间来让这个伤口结疤 |
| [12:45] | I’m sorry I got Claire involved, | 对不起我把克莱尔也扯了进来 |
| [12:47] | But — and this is not a criticism, | 但是 我不是想批评你 |
| [12:49] | but sometimes you can be a little sensitive | 但是有时候你对你的外型 |
| [12:52] | about your…appearance. | 太过于敏感了 |
| [12:53] | Well, this is a criticism — | 这就是批评 |
| [12:54] | sometimes you can be insensitive about everything. | 有时你对所有事情都太不敏感了 |
| [12:57] | I just can’t — I just feel like | 我只是觉得 我们的感情足够坚固 |
| [12:59] | our relationship’s strong enough to survive a little candor. | 经得起一点坦诚的考验 |
| [13:02] | I mean, look, you could tell me | 如果我有什么让你不满意的 |
| [13:03] | if there’s something about me you’d like to change. | 你就可以直说 |
| [13:05] | I hate your beard. | 我讨厌你的胡子 |
| [13:08] | Well, you had that bullet in the chamber. | 你还留了这么一手 |
| [13:10] | I never said anything because I never wanted to hurt you… | 我从来没说过 是因为我不想伤害你 |
| [13:13] | but I’ve always found your beard off-putting. | 但是我一直觉得你的胡子很烦人 |
| [13:21] | See? Hurts. | 是吧 小心脏疼死了吧 |
| [13:26] | Mitchell? | 米奇尔 |
| [13:28] | Mitchell, get back here! | 米奇尔 回来 |
| [13:34] | What are you doing? | 你在干吗 |
| [13:35] | I’m shaving off the beard. | 我要把胡子剃了 |
| [13:37] | Seriously? | 你认真的吗 |
| [13:38] | Yeah, well, the man I love doesn’t like it, so off it goes. | 当然 我家男人不喜欢 那就剃掉 |
| [13:42] | Well, good. | 好 |
| [13:42] | -Good. – Great. | -好的 -很好 |
| [13:44] | Great. Okay. | 很好 那好 |
| [13:46] | One… | 一 |
| [13:47] | two… | 二 |
| [13:49] | three. | 三 |
| [13:52] | Wait! | 住手 |
| [13:53] | The fact that you’re willing to do it is enough for me. | 对我来说 你肯这么做已经足够了 |
| [13:56] | I love your beard. | 我爱你的胡子 |
| [13:58] | I love that when you drink cappuccino, you get foam in it | 我喜欢你喝卡布奇诺时 会沾上奶油 |
| [14:01] | and when you’re nervous, your little… | 还有你紧张的时候 |
| [14:02] | hairs twitch. | 你的小胡子会抖 |
| [14:05] | Well, you couldn’t have told me before took a notch out? | 你就不能在我刮掉这块之前说吗 |
| [14:07] | I’m sorry. I — I — listen. | 对不起 听着 |
| [14:09] | I know… I can be touchy about… this. | 我知道 我对于这个 有些太敏感 |
| [14:14] | But you’re this amazing-looking guy, and — | 但是你是个超级大帅哥 |
| [14:17] | I am not amazing – | 我不帅 |
| [14:19] | Really? | 是实话吗 |
| [14:20] | I wouldn’t change anything. | 我不想改变你的任何一点 |
| [14:24] | You should know that every day, | 你要知道我每天醒来 |
| [14:26] | I wake up very grateful to have you in my life. | 都因为我的生命中有你而心怀感激 |
| [14:29] | I’m the one who got lucky, handsome. | 我才是幸运儿 帅哥 |
| [14:31] | Maybe I just don’t show it enough. | 也许是我表达的不够 |
| [14:33] | Well, you can make it up to me by doing my shoulders. | 你可以服务一下我的肩膀作为补偿 |
| [14:36] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [14:44] | I meant a massage. What are you saying? | 我是指按摩 你在想什么 |
| [14:46] | Oh, Mitchell. Mitchell. | 米奇尔 米奇尔 |
| [14:54] | It’s Mackenzie. | 是麦肯齐 |
| [14:55] | Again. | 又是她 |
| [14:56] | She wants me to come to this party she’s throwing. | 她想让我参加她办的派对 |
| [14:58] | She texted me earlier. | 她之前发过短信给我 |
| [14:59] | You texted her back, right? | 你回她短信了 对吧 |
| [15:01] | No. | 才没有 |
| [15:03] | I’m… | 我感到 |
| [15:04] | proud? | 孺子可教也 |
| [15:06] | – Tell her you’ll try and come. – Right. | -跟她说你会尽量抽时间去 -好 |
| [15:08] | And then when she says — | 然后等她说 |
| [15:09] | Haley… | 海莉 |
| [15:10] | I got this. | 我知道怎么做 |
| [15:14] | Who’s this? | 你是哪位 |
| [15:15] | Brilliant. | 干的漂亮 |
| [15:16] | No, I didn’t see it. I get a lot of texts. | 不 我没看到 我短信太多了 |
| [15:21] | I have a sister. | 果然是姐妹 |
| [15:24] | When’s the party? | 派对是什么时候 |
| [15:26] | I’ll try and come. | 我会尽量抽空去 |
| [15:28] | You know, I’m kind of busy. I have a life. | 你知道我很忙的 我有自己的生活 |
| [15:31] | You know, stuff. | 有很多事做 |
| [15:32] | Homework. | 还有作业 |
| [15:34] | Uh-oh. | 完了 |
| [15:35] | I mean, not homework. | 我是说 作业算什么 |
| [15:37] | It’s not work if you love it. | 对于爱学习的人来说 算什么呀 |
| [15:38] | Oh, god. Hang up. Hang up. | 天啊 挂掉 挂掉 |
| [15:40] | Shut up! | 闭嘴 |
| [15:41] | Not you, Mackenzie. | 没说你 麦肯齐 |
| [15:42] | Drop the phone and kick it over here! | 赶紧把电话扔地上踢过来 |
| [15:44] | Um, I have to go. | 我得挂电话了 |
| [15:45] | I-I’ll call you later. | 晚点我再打给你 |
| [15:46] | Or you call me later. | 或者你打给人家也行 |
| [15:47] | Love you! | 爱你 |
| [15:49] | Aah! Aah! | 发花痴 |
| [15:50] | Aah! Aah! | 跟着发花痴 |
| [15:52] | They were right in here! | 刚才还在呢 |
| [15:53] | I know, and we looked everywhere, honey, | 我知道 我们哪都找遍了 |
| [15:55] | so just calm down. | 要淡定 |
| [15:56] | Are you kidding me? “Calm down”? | 淡定皆浮云 |
| [15:58] | In one minute, | 一分钟后 |
| [15:59] | I’m gonna be standing up there like… | 我就要上台了 就像一个 |
| [16:00] | like a… | 像个 |
| [16:02] | Oh, my God. I have no material at all. | 天哪 我词穷了 |
| [16:05] | Okay. You’re gonna be fine. You don’t need jokes. | 没事 你一定行的 你不需要准备笑话的 |
| [16:06] | Listen to me, honey. | 听我说 亲爱的 |
| [16:07] | Get up there. Be your charming self. | 走上台去 展现自己迷人的那面 |
| [16:09] | Make the introductions from your heart, and get out. | 发自肺腑地来个自我介绍 |
| [16:12] | You’re gonna — You’re gonna be amazing, okay? | 你会表现得很犀利的 好吗 |
| [16:15] | Phil Dunphy. | 菲尔·邓菲 |
| [16:16] | Go. Go. | 上吧 上吧 |
| [16:30] | Good evening. | 各位晚上好 |
| [16:31] | I would not be here tonight | 我今天之所以 |
| [16:32] | if not for the hard work | 能够站在这里讲话 |
| [16:34] | of the S.C.A.R.B. Board of trustees… | 多亏了南加州房产经纪人董事会的大力支持 |
| [16:36] | I didn’t have my jokes. | 我的笑话没了 |
| [16:37] | What choice does a guy have but to play it straight? | 除了直抒胸意以外还有别的选择吗 |
| [16:40] | …the support of my family, | 来自家庭的支持 |
| [16:43] | and Gil Thorpe’s colon. | 以及吉尔·索普的结肠 |
| [16:53] | But Phil Dunphy is no straight guy. | 不过菲尔·邓菲可不是那种直抒胸意的人 |
| [16:58] | So many giants of residential real estate here tonight. | 今晚在坐的有这么多地产业的巨匠 |
| [17:02] | And, of course, J.J. McCubbin. | 当然 还有小小麦克宾 |
| [17:09] | I’m not saying J.J. is small, | 我不是说小小麦个头矮小 |
| [17:11] | but in the realty section, he was described as “Charming.” | 但在房地产业界 他被描述为犀利哥 |
| [17:17] | Mark Simon, you out there? | 马克·西蒙 你在吗 |
| [17:20] | There’s Mark. How are you, buddy? | 马克在那 你好吗 伙计 |
| [17:22] | Mark recently moved into a new model. | 马克最近住进了一套新的样板房 |
| [17:25] | How are you, Francine? | 过得如何 家庭妇男 |
| [17:29] | I kid, Mark Simon. I kid, Mark Simon. | 我开玩笑的 马克·西蒙 |
| [17:31] | You know that. | 你懂的 |
| [17:34] | Trancito, Little Manuel, and Carlos, my wife, Gloria. | 特兰西科 小马努 还有卡洛斯 这是我妻子歌洛莉亚 |
| [17:38] | Nice to meet you. | 幸会 |
| [17:39] | We have to talk. | 我们得谈谈 |
| [17:40] | Un momento. | 失陪下 |
| [17:41] | Mm. | 好的 |
| [17:43] | You know, I — | 我知道吗 我 |
| [17:44] | I can’t believe you never met them. | 真不敢相信你完全没印象 |
| [17:45] | You’ve never met any of these people. | 你从没接触过这里的任何人 |
| [17:47] | You don’t know anyone in this room. | 这房间所有的人你都不认识 |
| [17:49] | Vamos, Jay. | 走吧 杰 |
| [17:50] | I’m not leaving before the father/daughter dance. | 要走也要在父女共舞后再走 |
| [17:52] | And “These people,” As you call them, | 此外 你所谓的这些人 |
| [17:54] | are not just employees. | 不仅仅是雇员 |
| [17:55] | They’re mi familia, or “My family.” | 是个大家庭 或者称为家人 |
| [17:57] | I know what “Mi familia” is, Jay. | 我懂我的母语 杰 |
| [18:00] | Oh, I was afraid of this. | 他说的我可听不懂 |
| [18:08] | No. Jay. No. | 别去 杰 |
| [18:12] | Thank you. Thank you. | 谢谢你 |
| [18:14] | Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you very much. | 女士们先生们 非常感谢你们 |
| [18:16] | I’m gonna make this brief. | 我简单说几句 |
| [18:17] | I know a lot of you out there don’t even know who I am. | 我知道你们中的大部分人甚至不知道我是谁 |
| [18:19] | As my lovely wife, Gloria, pointed out, | 正如我的爱妻歌洛莉亚所指出的那样 |
| [18:21] | That’s my fault, not yours. | 错不在你们 在我 |
| [18:24] | I’m Jay Pritchett, | 我是杰·普里契特 |
| [18:26] | El jefe. | 你们的老板 |
| [18:28] | Listen — on this very, very happy occasion, | 听着 在如此欢乐的时刻 |
| [18:31] | I’d like to pick up the tab on the bar. | 今天我请客 |
| [18:38] | You know, when I started this company… | 你们知道吗 在我建立公司之初 |
| [18:42] | …the first thing that I — | 我所 的第一件事 |
| [18:43] | What? | 怎么 |
| [18:45] | Oh, right. Right, now. Good. Yeah. | 对了 很好 是的 现在 |
| [18:46] | This is not about me. | 今晚我不是主角 |
| [18:48] | This is about a very special young lady | 主角是一位非常出众的年轻女士 |
| [18:50] | And the man who loves her more than anyone else on earth. | 以及一位世上最爱她的男人 |
| [18:58] | Isn’t that lovely? | 多温馨啊 |
| [19:01] | That’s a beautiful, beautiful thing. | 那是件多有爱的事情啊 |
| [19:03] | You know, I’m reminded | 你们知道吗 这让我想起了 |
| [19:03] | of when I used to dance with my little girl. | 当初我和我的小宝贝一起跳舞 |
| [19:06] | But not like that. | 不过不是像这样 |
| [19:11] | Slow down, there, muchacho. | 悠着点 男孩 |
| [19:14] | No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. | 别别别别别昏昏昏昏昏昏 |
| [19:17] | What, are you applauding this? You’re applauding this? | 难道你们在为此喝彩吗 你们在为此鼓掌吗 |
| [19:19] | I don’t care what kind of tradition this is. | 我才不管这是哪门子传统 |
| [19:21] | This is gonna stop. Hey, hey, hey, hey. No! | 给我停下 听到没 停下 |
| [19:23] | No! What? What? Am I the only one seeing this?! | 什么 难道只有我目睹这一幕吗 |
| [19:26] | V-v-vamos! | 我们 |
| [19:27] | I mean, honey, I am not kidding when I tell you | 亲爱的 我很认真的告诉过你 |
| [19:29] | There was a woman next to me gasping for breath. | 坐在我旁边的那个女人都笑岔气了 |
| [19:32] | Seriously, you were so freaking funny, Phil. | 真的 菲尔 你太搞笑了 |
| [19:35] | I have seen professional comedians | 我有看过专业喜剧演员的演出 |
| [19:37] | Who could never have done that. | 也没有如此笑开了锅 |
| [19:38] | You were unbeliev– | 你真是一直被模仿 从未被超越啊 |
| [19:41] | I know it was you, Claire. You stole my index cards. | 我知道是你拿走了我的索引卡片 克莱尔 |
| [19:47] | I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. | 对不起 真的对不起 |
| [19:50] | I thought I was protecting you. | 我以为我是在保护你 |
| [19:52] | And if my plan had been successful, | 如果我的计划成功的话 |
| [19:54] | I would have robbed you of the greatest night ever. | 那我就夺走了你今夜的辉煌了 |
| [20:00] | I’m sorry I’m awful. | 对不起 我真讨厌 |
| [20:01] | You’re not awful. | 才没呢 |
| [20:03] | Mm… | 是吗 |
| [20:04] | Claire… | 克莱尔 |
| [20:05] | I love that you’re looking out for me, | 我就爱你处处为我着想这点 |
| [20:08] | and know why you worry about me. | 也知道你为什么要担心我 |
| [20:11] | But I knew I had this tonight. | 但我对今晚早就胸有成竹了 |
| [20:15] | I know. | 我知道了 |
| [20:17] | Sometimes I just think my job | 只是有的时候我觉得 |
| [20:19] | Is to make sure you guys don’t fall on your faces. | 我的工作就是防止邓家人栽跟头 |
| [20:21] | That’s a hard job in the Dunphy house. | 这对邓菲家族的人来说可不是件容易事儿 |
| [20:25] | We fall a lot. | 我们丢人是常事 |
| [20:26] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [20:27] | Maybe your real job is to be the person who picks us back up. | 也许你真正的工作是给予安慰 重树我们的信心 |
| [20:32] | Nobody does that better than you. | 这方面没人比你更在行了 |
| [20:34] | Thank you. | 谢谢夸奖 |
| [20:40] | Alex. | 艾丽克斯 |
| [20:42] | I have no friends. | 我没有朋友 |
| [20:45] | You’re on the clock. | 该你出马了 |
| [20:52] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [20:55] | What happened? | 出什么事情了 |
| [21:03] | Oh, my gosh, mom. You’re killing me. | 我的天哪 老妈 笑死我了 |
| [21:05] | It’s pretty good, right? | 很好笑 对吧 |
| [21:06] | Pretty good? You could be, like, in Vegas. | 好笑 你都可以去拉斯维加斯 |
| [21:08] | Well… | 好吧 |
| [21:09] | W-w-what’s going on there? | 这神马情况 |
| [21:11] | Mom does the funniest impression | 老妈刚给我模仿了下 |
| [21:12] | Of that weird lady at the supermarket. | 那天在超市碰到的怪阿姨 |
| [21:14] | Oh, yeah. I know her. Let’s hear it. | 我认识她 说来听听 |
| [21:17] | Okay. Um… | 好的 |
| [21:19] | “It’s cheaper | 如果你买两罐泡菜的话 |
| [21:20] | if you buy two jars of pickles.” | 会更便宜 |
| [21:26] | It’s like she’s right here! | 简直活灵活现 |
| [21:27] | I know! Yeah. | 我懂了 |
| [21:28] | So like she’s right here! I know. | 听起来就像原景再现似的 |
| [21:30] | That’s not what she sounds like. | 其实一点都不像 |