时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:01] | Jay. | 杰 |
[00:04] | – Jay… -What?! | -杰… -怎么 |
[00:06] | – What’s wrong? – You are snoring! | -什么事 -你在打鼾 |
[00:08] | Me? Oh, I’m sorry. | 我吗 对不起 |
[00:13] | Look at her! | 看我家小宝贝 |
[00:16] | Come on! We said no Stella in the bed. | 拜托 说好了不许斯黛拉上床 |
[00:18] | Oh but she’s just a little puppy. | 狗狗还小呢 |
[00:20] | She probably get scared and snuck in. | 她八成是害怕了 偷偷躲进我怀里 |
[00:22] | Oh really? How come when Manny have nightmares | 是吗 那为什么曼尼做噩梦的时候 |
[00:24] | you don’t let him snuck in bed? | 你不准他溜上床 |
[00:26] | Gloria, it’s six o’clock in the morning, | 歌洛莉亚 现在才早晨六点 |
[00:27] | can we talk about this later? | 咱能待会再讨论这个问题吗 |
[00:30] | Answer the question, Jay. | 请正面回答她的问题 杰 |
[00:35] | You know, I’m gonna check the lease, | 我去查一查租赁合同 |
[00:36] | but I’m pretty sure we’re not allowed to have a meth lab. | 但我很确信我们不能开个冰毒作坊 |
[00:38] | You are a delight. | 你真幽默 |
[00:40] | So what are you doing? | 那你这是在做什么 |
[00:41] | I think you’re gonna like this. I’m going on a juice fast. | 我觉得你会喜欢的 我要进行”果汁速度减肥法” |
[00:45] | Mmm. Love it. | 我爱死了 |
[00:46] | Hate it. Let’s face it, | 讨厌死了 面对现实吧 |
[00:48] | A well-fed Cam is hardly a model of emotional stability. | 肚大腰圆的小卡原本就容易情绪失控 |
[00:52] | Now deprive him of food, and stage by stage, | 一旦断粮 阶段性地往下发展 |
[00:55] | it’s a slow descent into madness. | 他便缓缓驶入疯狂的境地 |
[00:57] | Stage one–the clean sweep. | 阶段一 大清扫 |
[01:00] | Poison. | 毒货 |
[01:01] | Poison. | 毒货 |
[01:03] | – Poison. – Do you think that this is the best week to be doing this? | -毒货啊 -你觉得这周节食合适吗 |
[01:06] | Why not? | 怎么不合适 |
[01:07] | – Well, we have that charity thing at my boss’ house. – Oh, so what, | -我们要去我老板家参加慈善晚会 -那又怎样 |
[01:09] | I’m supposed to put off my quest for wellness | 我想追求健康生活 |
[01:11] | until we’re no longer socially in demand? | 还必须等到咱俩没有应酬吗 |
[01:13] | That will never happen. I’m too charismatic. | 我人见人爱 没应酬是不可能的 |
[01:15] | No. No. Not the cookies. | 不 别扔饼干 |
[01:17] | Of course the cookies. | 饼干扔立决 |
[01:20] | Why do you always want me to fail? | 你干嘛总希望我减肥失败 |
[01:21] | Stage two–attack Mitchell. | 阶段二 拿米奇尔撒气 |
[01:23] | Because when his diet crashes and burns | 一旦他经不住能多益巧克力酱的诱惑 |
[01:26] | into a giant pile of nutella, | 减肥计划流产 |
[01:29] | I’m the one he’s gonna blame. | 就把错全怪到我身上 |
[01:30] | Well, no, not this time. | 不 这回可不行 |
[01:32] | You know what? I’m gonna do the fast with you. | 这样 我决定和你一起减 |
[01:34] | I think it’s a great idea, and we should do it together. | 减肥计划很棒 我们应该一起执行 |
[01:36] | So we’re on the same team, you know, us versus food. | 我们齐心协力 夫夫齐心战美食 |
[01:39] | I know what you’re doing… | 你的心思我一清二楚 |
[01:42] | and I really appreciate it. | 我真的很感动 |
[01:44] | No, it’ll– it’ll be good for me. | 不 那将对我也有好处 |
[01:46] | I’ve actually put on a few pounds. | 我最近也重了几磅 |
[01:47] | Yeah, well, you know, I didn’t want to say anything. | 是啊 之前我都不好意思开口说你肥了 |
[01:55] | As the stock market plummeted, | 尽管各大股指直线下滑 |
[01:57] | brave young men took to the skies, | 勇敢的年轻人仍不畏高空 |
[02:00] | ushering in the golden age of the daredevil. | 引领我们进入勇敢无畏的黄金年代 |
[02:04] | How awesome are people? | 可敬的人类 |
[02:06] | So awesome. | 真可敬 |
[02:10] | You wanna get that, buddy? I’ll pause it. | 去开门吧 伙计 我按暂停了 |
[02:13] | – Hey, Luke. How’s it going? I– – Hey, uncle Mitchell. | -卢克 还好吗 -好啊 米奇尔舅舅 |
[02:15] | I really can’t talk. I’m trying to watch a movie. | 我真没时间闲聊 正在看电影呢 |
[02:17] | Oh, okay, well, I just wanted to drop off this bag of junk food. | 好吧 我只是把这袋垃圾食品拿过来 |
[02:21] | Go on. | 继续说 |
[02:22] | Uh, Cam and I are on a juice fast, | 小卡和我在实行”果汁速度减肥法” |
[02:24] | so having this stuff in the house– | 所以美食放在家里… |
[02:26] | I connected the dots. See ya. | 我懂了 再见 |
[02:35] | Seeing that weird, wonderful little man | 看到那位年轻的钢丝奇人 |
[02:37] | pursuing his dream of walking on a tightrope made me think | 精彩的寻梦之旅 我不禁在想 |
[02:41] | maybe I could pursue my dream… | 或许我也该追求自己的梦想 |
[02:43] | Here you go, buddy. | 拿好了 伙计 |
[02:49] | of walking on a tightrope. | 我也要走钢丝 |
[03:03] | Come on, dad! You got this! You can do this! | 加油 老爸 你行的 你可以的 |
[03:06] | Stay focused! Stay hungry! | 全神贯注 保持冲劲 |
[03:07] | You okay, buddy? | 没事吧 伙计 |
[03:08] | What? Yeah, hell, yeah, no. | 什么 当然没事 |
[03:10] | Just proud of my dad! | 就是为我老爹感到自豪 |
[03:11] | There was a lot of chocolate in that bag. | 那袋子里有好多巧克力 |
[03:15] | Phil, honey, you gotta take Luke to school. | 菲尔 亲爱的 该送卢克上学了 |
[03:18] | Got it. | 好的 |
[03:19] | Okay, I haven’t fallen three out of the last four times. | 好的 刚才4次里有3次没掉下来 |
[03:22] | This afternoon, we go airborne. | 今天下午 咱要悬空踩了 |
[03:33] | Sitting all by yourself at the table. | 孤零零一个人坐在桌前 |
[03:35] | Now where have I seen that again? | 这一幕似曾相识啊 |
[03:37] | Oh, right. Every day in the school cafeteria. | 对了 每天在学校自助餐厅都看到 |
[03:40] | I do that by choice. | 我选择一个人坐的 |
[03:42] | The school’s choice. | 是校友们选择冷落你吧 |
[03:42] | Isn’t that your nickname? | 你的绰号就是”校选之花”吧 |
[03:43] | Haley, be nice to your sister. | 海莉 对妹妹友善点 |
[03:45] | Alex, good save. | 艾丽克斯 回得好 |
[03:48] | Mom, sign this. | 妈妈 签个字 |
[03:49] | What is it? | 这是什么 |
[03:50] | They finally bumped me up to the harder math class. | 校方终于准我升入中级数学班了 |
[03:52] | Third period, Mr. Waters. | 高中数学第三期 沃特斯老师教 |
[03:53] | What? No, mom, you cannot sign this. | 什么 不 妈妈 你不能签 |
[03:55] | This is my class. | 我在那个班上课 |
[03:56] | You’re a freshman. What are you doing in second-year math? | 你才高一 学高二数学太早了吧 |
[03:58] | You’re a senior. What are you still doing in second year math? | 你都高三了 干嘛还赖在高二数学班里不走 |
[04:01] | Not “Still.” “Again.” | 不是赖着不走 姐是重修 |
[04:03] | Alex, be nice to your sister. | 艾丽克斯 别对姐姐那么刻薄 |
[04:05] | Haley, not a good save. | 海莉 回得不行 |
[04:07] | I knew it would suck having you at my school. | 就知道和你同校肯定受打击 |
[04:09] | Well, hang in there. | 你估计得忍耐一下 |
[04:10] | A couple more years, you’ll have it all to yourself again. | 再过几年 留在学校的又是你一人了 |
[04:12] | Come on, girls. | 走吧 姑娘们 |
[04:15] | Jay, look at this. | 杰 看她干得好事 |
[04:19] | It’s ruined. | 全毁了 |
[04:19] | Stella did this. She chew on my shoe! | 斯黛拉干的 她啃我的鞋 |
[04:21] | You have to discipline that stupid dog. | 那只笨狗欠管教 |
[04:23] | I discipline her all the time. | 我经常管教她的 |
[04:24] | Oh, really? How? By buying her little cupcakes? | 真的吗 怎么管的 赏她吃纸杯蛋糕吗 |
[04:27] | They’re not real cupcakes. | 那不算纸杯蛋糕 |
[04:28] | They’re doggy treats in the form of cupcakes. | 那是狗狗奖励 用纸杯蛋糕形式发放 |
[04:30] | Yeah, you should have told that to Manny before he ate one. | 你该在曼尼误食之前告诉他的 |
[04:33] | Oh, come on. His coat never looked better. | 没关系 他现在可是皮光水滑啊 |
[04:36] | You wouldn’t find it so funny if she was destroying your shoes. | 要是她把你的鞋啃成这样 看你还乐不乐 |
[04:39] | Well, I don’t leave my shoes laying around, so… | 我从不乱扔鞋子 也就不会… |
[04:41] | So it’s my fault that she chooses to chew my shoe? | 这么说鞋子挨啃是我自作自受了 |
[04:44] | I didn’t say that. You barely said it. | 我没这么说 这可是你自己说的 |
[04:47] | You have to stop coddling her. | 你不能再这么宠着她了 |
[04:48] | I don’t coddle her. | 我没宠着她 |
[04:53] | What? | 干嘛 |
[04:55] | She tries to drink the water. | 她在喝我的洗澡水呢 |
[04:58] | It’s funny. | 可逗了 |
[05:00] | You don’t look at me in class. You don’t text me. | 上课的时候不许看我 也不许给我发短信 |
[05:03] | Who would text during a class? | 谁会上课的时候发短信啊 |
[05:06] | What are you? | 你真是个怪胎 |
[05:07] | Hon, I realize that this situation is not ideal | 亲爱的 我知道现在这个情况 |
[05:10] | for either one of you, | 对你们两个都不理想 |
[05:11] | but sometimes we just rise above things. Yes? | 但有时候 逆境出人才嘛 |
[05:15] | Excuse me. Did you notice the curb here is painted yellow? | 打扰一下 你注意到了路缘是黄色的吗 |
[05:18] | Uh, no, I did not. | 没 我没注意 |
[05:20] | Wow. It means loading and unloading. | 奇怪了 这代表”上下车区域” |
[05:23] | Okay, well, I was just dropping off my kids. | 好吧 我就停一小会 让她们下车 |
[05:25] | And yet I see no kids emerging from the vehicle. | 我怎么还没看见有人下车呢 |
[05:27] | Well, we were chatting. | 我们在聊天 |
[05:30] | At the risk of surprising you a third time, officer, | 不怕惊着您 长官 |
[05:33] | I’ve been dropping off here for years, and I– | 我这么停车已经好几年了 |
[05:35] | – Move it. – Okay. You betcha. | -开走 -没问题 |
[05:36] | What was her problem? | 她有毛病吧 |
[05:38] | Oh, you know what you should have said to her– | 我教你 你该这么回她… |
[05:40] | Nothing. I should have said nothing would be the point. | 什么都不说最好 我不回嘴 |
[05:42] | I have to see her every day. | 我们抬头不见低头见 |
[05:43] | I mean, why make it worse? | 何必把事情搞得那么僵呢 |
[05:44] | That’s exactly what I’m talking about. | 我想表达的就是这个意思 |
[05:46] | Awkward, unpleasant situation– | 人生不如意事十有八九 |
[05:48] | rise above. | 逆境成功 |
[05:50] | Have a nice day. | 过得愉快 |
[05:52] | Love you! | 爱你们哟 |
[05:54] | Bye-bye! | 拜拜 |
[06:00] | “And yet I see no children emerging from the vehicle.” | “我怎么还没看见有人下车呢” |
[06:03] | How’d you like to see my fist emerging into your face? | 再啰嗦 赏你一记粉拳看看 |
[06:05] | Oh! Now I think of it! | 我怎么这么暴力 |
[06:11] | Day four of the juice fast, | “果汁速度减肥法”的第四天 |
[06:13] | and I’m hungry, but I’m– I’m feeling pretty good. | 我很饿 但是感觉很好 |
[06:16] | Cam, on the other hand, has gone all… | 可是小卡 已经 |
[06:18] | “Girl, Interrupted.” | 边缘精神错乱了 |
[06:20] | After one, throwing out all of our food, | 继阶段一 食物大清扫 |
[06:22] | and two, blaming me, | 和阶段二 拿我撒气 |
[06:24] | he entered stage three– soap actress. | 他进入了第三阶段 肥皂剧女王 |
[06:27] | I just wish my sister would put herself out there more. | 真希望我的傻妹妹多为自己想想 |
[06:30] | She has so much to offer. | 她如此多才多艺 |
[06:33] | Why are men so superficial? | 为何男人都如此肤浅 |
[06:37] | That was followed by stage four– | 随之而来的是第四阶段 |
[06:39] | a rush of epiphanies… | 间歇性中邪 |
[06:40] | I… Don’t… Need… Food. | 我 不 需 要 食 物 |
[06:44] | Look at this. Architecture is everywhere. | 看啊 到处都是别致的建筑 |
[06:47] | Oh. Spaniards make amazing athletes. | 西班牙的运动健将层出不穷 |
[06:49] | Into stage five–despair… | 接下来是第五阶段 绝望主夫 |
[06:53] | Daddy, we hided, but you didn’t seek. | 爹地 我们藏好了 但是你没来找我们 |
[06:58] | Cam? | 小卡 |
[07:00] | Then came rage. | 然后是狂躁状态 |
[07:08] | Hey. Whatcha got there? | 手里拿的啥啊 |
[07:09] | The good news is, | 好消息是 |
[07:11] | Cam’s never made it this far into a diet before, so… | 小卡从来没坚持过这么久 |
[07:15] | Downside–I have no idea what the next stage is gonna be. | 坏消息是 我对下一阶段会怎样一无所知 |
[07:18] | But I’m pretty sure | 但是我可以肯定 |
[07:19] | it’s not charming party guest. | 他此时的状态不适合参加派对 |
[07:21] | Cam, I-I was thinking, | 小卡 我在考虑 |
[07:22] | I’ll take the bullet tomorrow night at my boss’ house. | 明晚我独身赴会 接受老板的摧残吧 |
[07:25] | You don’t have to go to the party. | 你不必去参加的 |
[07:28] | They’re–they’re boring. | 那些人特无聊 |
[07:31] | Silly cause, you know, lots of people. | 还净做傻事 人也多 |
[07:35] | Parking… | 车位也紧张 |
[07:37] | – Cam, say something. – Why do you hate me? | -小卡 好歹说句话啊 -你为何如此恨我 |
[07:39] | I don’t hate you. | 我不恨你啊 |
[07:40] | Then why are you trying to push me out of your life? | 那为什么要把我驱逐出你的生活 |
[07:42] | Because you–you seem a little… | 因为你看起来 有点 |
[07:46] | unhinged. | 精神错乱 |
[07:47] | Okay, well, you know what I think? | 知道我在想什么吗 |
[07:48] | You should worry a little bit less about me | 你应该少操我的心 |
[07:50] | and a little bit more about yourself | 多操心你自己 |
[07:51] | and what you’re gonna wear tomorrow night, | 想想明晚穿什么吧 |
[07:52] | because I saw what you have laid out, | 我看到了你选的那套了 |
[07:54] | and I don’t think you’re gonna like the way you look in photos. | 要是穿那套拍照 你一定悔不当初 |
[07:59] | Well, I hadn’t landed on that. | 我没决定穿那套啊 |
[08:02] | Her hand’s in the air, like, every five seconds, | 她几乎五秒钟就要举一次手 |
[08:04] | and she actually reminded Mr. Waters to assign homework. | 还主动提醒沃特斯先生布置家庭作业 |
[08:07] | The class loved that. Do you know how embarrassed I was? | 同学怨声载道 你知道我有多尴尬吗 |
[08:10] | Not as embarrassed as I was | 没有我尴尬 |
[08:11] | when she said 8 was a prime number. 8, mom. | 她说8是质数 8唉 妈妈 |
[08:14] | Okay, fine. You know what? | 行了 你们听着 |
[08:16] | I’m gonna call the school today and have your schedules changed, | 我今天就给学校打电话 把你们课表换掉 |
[08:18] | but I want you to know a little part of me died today, okay? | 但是你们要知道 我今天很失望 |
[08:22] | I thought the two of you could understand | 我还以为你们能明白 |
[08:24] | how being in the same class would benefit you both. | 姐妹同班对你们都有好处 |
[08:27] | Alex, you–you could’ve tutored Haley. | 艾丽克斯 你可以辅导海莉的功课 |
[08:28] | Haley, you could’ve helped alex with her social skills. | 海莉 你可以教艾丽克斯交往之道 |
[08:32] | Come on. The two of you could’ve been two Super Dunphys. | 拜托 你们本该成为超级邓菲无敌档 |
[08:35] | And instead, what are you? Two bickering Half-Dunphys, | 但现在呢 你们像什么样 邓菲反目吵嘴王 |
[08:39] | and I’m the fool that expected more. | 我真是痴人说梦才对你们抱期望 |
[08:40] | No, I don’t even want to hear it. Just go upstairs. Go. | 停 我不想听 给我上楼去 |
[08:49] | What was that? | 这唱的是哪一出啊 |
[08:51] | That was a master class in parenting. | 虎妈独家育儿经 |
[08:53] | Right now our daughters are upstairs | 现在我们的女儿在楼上 |
[08:55] | making a decision they think is their own, | 自以为是地做着决定 |
[08:57] | But really, it was an idea that was skillfully implanted by me. | 但实际上 都是我巧妙植入的潜意识 |
[09:00] | Inception, Claire. | 成盗梦师啦 克莱尔 |
[09:02] | Dangerous game, but I like it. | 玩的就是心跳 我很喜欢 |
[09:09] | What are those? | 那是什么 |
[09:10] | Wire walkers. | 走钢丝专用鞋 |
[09:12] | You want to go to the dance, you gotta wear the shoes. | 所谓工欲善其事 必先利其器 |
[09:15] | Luke, grab your camera. | 带上照相机 卢克 |
[09:19] | Luke. | 卢克 |
[09:20] | I wasn’t sleeping. | 我没睡着 |
[09:23] | Honey, I-I think those are… | 亲爱的 那好像是… |
[09:26] | Jazz shoes. | 爵士舞鞋 |
[09:27] | No. Tightrope shoes. | 不是 是钢丝鞋 |
[09:28] | Got ’em at an estate sale. Only worn once. | 别人搬家大拍卖时买下的 只穿过一次 |
[09:31] | That–that is not a ringing endorsement for… | 那可不适合… |
[09:33] | Oh! Phil, honey. | 菲尔 亲爱的 |
[09:36] | Please be ca–careful. Right. | 拜托 小心点 |
[09:39] | Watch the door. | 小心别撞门 |
[09:43] | Hey, what’d you get for number 3? | 你第三题答案多少 |
[09:45] | You’re not going to learn if I just give you answers. | 如果我直接告诉你答案 你就学不到东西了 |
[09:48] | Well, what if I gave you something in return? | 那如果我给你一点回报呢 |
[09:51] | Like what? | 比如什么 |
[09:52] | You can talk to me in class. | 你在班上可以跟我讲话 |
[09:57] | I want lunch at the cool table. | 午餐时间 我要和你们人气王坐一桌 |
[09:59] | Then I want all the answers. | 那我要所有题的答案 |
[10:01] | Then I want a week at the table. | 延续一周午餐同坐 |
[10:02] | – That’ll cost you two pop quizzes. -A month. | -两次测试答案 -一个月 |
[10:04] | -The midterm. -Deal. | -外加期中考试 -成交 |
[10:07] | Looking great, dad. | 老爸 挺有范啊 |
[10:08] | With these steps, I break the surly bonds… | 走出这几步 我就打破了束缚 |
[10:13] | Chicken in a basket! | 上帝保佑 |
[10:17] | Don’t look at me. | 别拍我 |
[10:20] | – Mom. Mom. Mom. -What? What? What? What? What? | -老妈 老妈 -怎么了 怎么了 |
[10:22] | Mom. Mom. Did you call the school yet? | 妈妈 你打电话给学校了吗 |
[10:24] | Uh, not yet, but I was just about to. | 还没呢 我正准备打 |
[10:26] | Uh, Bartles & Jaymes! | 哎哟我去 |
[10:27] | Good. Because we are thinking | 那就好 仔细考虑之后 |
[10:29] | We might want to stay in that class. | 我们觉得挺想在一个班的 |
[10:30] | Really? Oh, girls, I don’t know about that. | 真的吗 孩子们 我不确定啊 |
[10:32] | Oh, please let us try it. | 拜托了 再给个机会吧 |
[10:34] | Super Dunphy? | 超级邓菲无敌档 |
[10:35] | I can’t hold her! I can’t hold her! | 我抓不住了 抓不住了 |
[10:39] | Well, maybe one more week. | 好吧 就再待一个星期 |
[10:41] | Thanks, mom. | 谢谢 妈妈 |
[10:47] | I don’t know. Uh, a cup of soup, a cobb salad. | 好像吃过 一碗汤 一份科布色拉 |
[10:50] | Yeah, it had bacon. | 对 里面有培根 |
[10:52] | Cam, I don’t have all day to describe all my meals to you. | 小卡 我没时间跟你讲我今天吃了什么 |
[10:56] | Stop eating all my things, you stupid animal. | 别再咬我的东西了 你个愚蠢的畜生 |
[11:00] | No, Cam, not you. | 不是 小卡 我不是在说你 |
[11:01] | I’ll call you back. | 我回头给你电话 |
[11:03] | Bad doggy! | 坏狗狗 |
[11:04] | You want to chew on something? | 你想咬东西吗 |
[11:05] | Okay. Okay. Okay. | 行 没问题 |
[11:07] | Look at this. | 看这个 |
[11:09] | Look at this delicious man shoe. Eat it. | 看这美味的男士鞋 尽情咬吧 |
[11:12] | Come on. Eat it. Eat it. | 来吧 咬啊 咬啊 |
[11:15] | Mmm! Yummy. | 很美味的 |
[11:18] | Eat the shoe. | 把鞋子吃掉 |
[11:20] | Eat his shoe. Come on. Eat his shoe. | 来嘛 咬这只鞋子 |
[11:24] | Yeah, like this. Look. | 就像这样 |
[11:27] | Delicious. | 真好吃 |
[11:30] | Mom? | 妈妈 |
[11:32] | Drop it. | 松口 |
[11:37] | I– | 我 |
[11:38] | Please. I’m sorry you had to see this. | 别说了 抱歉让你看到这一幕 |
[11:48] | hello? | 你好 |
[11:49] | Hi, Mrs. Dunphy. This is Rose in the principal’s office. | 邓菲夫人您好 我是校长助理罗丝 |
[11:51] | -Can you hold for principal Weller? -Yes. | -您方便跟韦勒校长讲话吗 -好的 |
[11:56] | Hi, Claire. | 你好 克莱尔 |
[11:57] | Hi, John. What’d she do this time? | 你好 约翰 她又犯什么事了 |
[12:00] | Actually, I’ve got both of them in here. | 事实上 她们俩都在我这儿 |
[12:02] | Both of them? Really? | 她们俩 真的吗 |
[12:03] | Alex was letting Haley copy her homework. | 艾丽克斯给海莉抄作业 |
[12:06] | Mr. Waters caught them. | 被沃特斯老师发现了 |
[12:07] | I-I don’t believe it. | 真不敢相信 |
[12:09] | I’m about to have a little talk with them, | 我会跟她们俩谈谈 |
[12:11] | So they’ll be out a few minutes late. | 所以她们会晚一会儿出来 |
[12:13] | Um, I’m so sorry, John, and honestly, | 约翰 非常抱歉 说句老实话 |
[12:15] | I-I really am a better mother than this. I promise. | 我通常不至于如此教导无方 我发誓 |
[12:18] | So you’ve said. | 你以前也这么说过 |
[12:22] | Seriously? | 不是吧 |
[12:24] | Seriously? Oh. You… | 不是吧 你 |
[12:27] | Excuse me. | 抱歉打扰一下 |
[12:30] | Hey, um, what the hell is this? | 这是什么鬼东西 |
[12:32] | This zone is for loading and unloading, | 这片区域仅限上下车 |
[12:34] | not for talking on the phone. | 不是用来讲电话的 |
[12:35] | Yeah, I know, but I was talking on the phone to the school | 我知道 但是我是在跟校长讲电话 |
[12:38] | that my kids were about to come out of, so… | 孩子们就要出来了 所以 |
[12:40] | Are you aware this zone has a time limit? | 你知道这里有时间限制吗 |
[12:42] | N-no, I’m not. | 不 我不知道 |
[12:47] | You know what? I do want to do some unloading. | 知道不 姐现在还真想发泄几句 |
[12:49] | I know your type. | 我了解你这种人 |
[12:51] | Life has been bad to you. It has made you feel small. | 你的生活太糟 觉得自己很渺小 |
[12:55] | And then one day somebody gives you a fake cop outfit, | 然后有一天 某人给了你一身山寨警察装 |
[12:58] | A toy badge and a little spongebob tie. | 一个玩具徽章 和一个破领带 |
[13:01] | Suddenly it’s payback time, right? | 你突然就想报复社会了 对不对 |
[13:03] | Well, I got news for you, | 我告诉你 |
[13:04] | “Law & order: Special parking unit,” | “法律与秩序:特殊停车警” |
[13:08] | Not my fault. | 我没错 |
[13:15] | I’m really sorry, dad. | 真对不起 爸爸 |
[13:16] | Oh, it’s all right. | 没关系的 |
[13:18] | Everybody throws up at school. | 在学校吐过的又不止你一个人 |
[13:20] | If I had a nickel for every time I puked at school, | 要是我在学校每吐一次能赚五分钱 |
[13:22] | you know how much money I’d have? | 你猜我一共能赚多少 |
[13:24] | 35 cents. | 三十五分钱 |
[13:25] | Exactly. Now go get cleaned up, and I’ll call the doctor. | 没错 去洗洗干净 我马上打给医生 |
[13:29] | Wait, dad, I don’t need a doctor. | 爸 等等 我不用医生 |
[13:31] | – What’s up? – The other day, | -怎么了 -前些天 |
[13:33] | Uncle Mitchell brought over a bag of junk food | 米奇尔舅舅送了一大袋垃圾食品过来 |
[13:35] | So he and Cam could do a jew fast. | 以便他和小卡施行快速减”犹”法 |
[13:37] | – Juice fast? – I’m pretty sure he said “Jew”. | -是果汁减”油”吧 -他说的肯定是”减犹” |
[13:40] | But anyway, I took the bag, and I hid it, and I ate it all. | 随便吧 我截获下来 藏了起来 全都吃了 |
[13:44] | Oh, buddy. | 不是吧老弟 |
[13:45] | I couldn’t help myself. I’m weak. Don’t look at me. | 我情难自禁 我意志薄弱 别鄙视我 |
[13:48] | It’s all right. | 没关系的 |
[13:50] | It’s okay. Hey, you learned a lesson. | 没事的 你从中获得了教训 |
[13:54] | A painful lesson. | 惨痛的教训 |
[13:57] | I guess we both have. | 我们爷俩都是 |
[13:59] | What do you mean? | 什么意思 |
[14:02] | I always saw myself as a guy | 我一直以为自己是个 |
[14:03] | who could soar through the sky, dancing on a wire. | 上天入地无所不能的纯爷们 |
[14:06] | I can’t even get across one 6 inches off the ground. | 可我连离地六英寸的钢丝都走不过 |
[14:09] | Well, maybe that’s the problem. | 也许这正是问题所在 |
[14:11] | Maybe you keep falling | 也许 你之所以会摔倒 |
[14:12] | because part of you knows that you can fall. | 是因为你心里觉得摔下来也无大碍 |
[14:16] | Maybe if the wire was much, much higher, you wouldn’t fall. | 如果钢丝架得很高很高 你就不会摔了 |
[14:20] | Oh, Luke, Luke, Luke. | 卢克 卢克 卢克 |
[14:24] | You are a genius. | 你是个天才 |
[14:25] | Come on. We got work to do. | 来吧 咱们有活儿干了 |
[14:27] | Yes! Can I have a doughnut first? | 太给力了 我能先吃个甜甜圈吗 |
[14:28] | Yes, you can! | 没问题 |
[14:30] | Ah, there they are, my super Dunphys. | 总算出来了 超级邓菲无敌档 |
[14:34] | We’re sorry, but we just– | 我们很抱歉 但我们… |
[14:36] | You don’t get to talk. | 你没资格解释 |
[14:38] | You had a chance to be better people today. | 你们今天原本可以进步一些的 |
[14:41] | You, to be more well-rounded, | 你 可以学会和人相处 |
[14:43] | And you, to be a better student. | 而你 可以做个好学生 |
[14:45] | You could have elevated the Dunphy name, | 你们本来能给邓菲家增光的 |
[14:47] | But instead, you chose to tarnish it, | 但恰恰相反 你们却给抹了黑 |
[14:49] | So, congratulations, ladies, | 所以 恭喜二位小姐 |
[14:51] | You brought this family to a new low. | 你们让家族名誉再次跌得无下限 |
[14:56] | Mom, are you– | 妈 你是不是… |
[14:56] | Yeah. Yeah, I am, | 是的 没错 |
[14:58] | And I would actually like to get these loosened up, if I might. | 可以的话 希望你帮我解开这个 |
[15:00] | – Are we gonna have any more trouble? – No, ma’am. | -你以后还继续添乱吗 -绝对不会 |
[15:03] | Oh, Claire, do you need me to drive the girls? | 克莱尔 需要我开车送孩子们吗 |
[15:05] | All good, Janet. All good. | 没事儿 珍妮特 没事儿 |
[15:09] | Goat cheese risotto ball? | 尝尝奶酪团子吧 |
[15:11] | No, thank you. | 不用了 谢谢 |
[15:12] | Are you sure? They’re so good. | 确定吗 很好吃的哦 |
[15:14] | Walk away. | 闪一边儿去 |
[15:16] | It’s tough enough to deal with Cam when I’m at full strength. | 就算我精力充沛 也很难控制住小卡 |
[15:19] | But I have been fasting just as long as he has, | 但我跟他一样经受了”果汁速度减肥法”的摧残 |
[15:21] | and I do not have the energy | 所以我也没力气 |
[15:22] | to deal with a big, needy brisketcase– | 去对付那个可怜的”大怪头” |
[15:25] | Brass–basketcase. | 大侩…大块头 |
[15:28] | Cam! Don’t be mad at me, | 小卡 别生我的气 |
[15:30] | But I think that you really need to eat something. | 但你真的得吃点儿东西 |
[15:32] | What? | 什么 |
[15:33] | You’re supposed to be my support. | 你应该支持我的 |
[15:35] | Oh, away from me, temptress. | 离我远点儿 你个狐狸精 |
[15:37] | And I never thought I would call you that in a negative way. | 以前叫你狐狸精是爱你 现在是真恨你 |
[15:39] | I’ve seen her do a lot of crazy stuff, | 我看她做过很多疯狂的事儿 |
[15:41] | But this is a whole new level. | 但此次的疯狂又上升一个等级 |
[15:45] | Is this a people cookie? | 这饼干是给人吃的吗 |
[15:46] | You’re good. | 吃吧 没事儿 |
[15:47] | A definitive “yes” or “no” would be appreciated. | 你只要说”是”或”不是”就行了 |
[15:49] | Those cupcakes did a number on me. | 上次的蛋糕已经给我留下阴影了 |
[15:54] | Are you happy? | 你高兴了吧 |
[15:56] | You have reduced me to a person who eats a shoe. | 你让我自贱到吃鞋子的地步 |
[15:59] | – Gloria, sit. -You think this is funny? | -歌洛莉亚 坐下 -你觉得很好玩吗 |
[16:01] | To talk to me like I am a dog? | 把我当狗一样地使唤 |
[16:03] | I’m not talking to you like you’re a dog. | 我可没有把你当狗一样使唤 |
[16:04] | I’m just asking you to sit so we can get to the bottom of this. | 我只是请你坐下 好把问题解决了 |
[16:07] | Okay, fine. | 好吧 |
[16:09] | Good girl. | 真乖 |
[16:11] | Come on. You set me up. | 拜托 你自己给我机会的 |
[16:12] | Gloria, why are you acting so crazy? | 歌洛莉亚 你为何表现的那么疯狂 |
[16:13] | It’s just a little dog. | 不就是条狗嘛 |
[16:15] | It’s not the little dog that is making me crazy. | 不是狗把我逼疯了 |
[16:17] | It’s you that is making me crazy. | 是你把我逼疯了 |
[16:18] | – Me? -Yeah, you used to put me first. | -我 -没错 你以前把我放在第一位的 |
[16:21] | You used to want me in that shower. | 以前是我陪你洗澡 |
[16:23] | Should I be here for this? | 我是不是该”非礼勿听” |
[16:24] | No, Manny. It’s okay. I go. But I want you to know this. | 不用 曼尼 没关系 我走 但我要告诉你 |
[16:27] | Where I come from, men cherish woman. | 在我老家 男人都宠着女人 |
[16:29] | It goes wife, mistress, dog. | 老婆第一 情人第二 狗第三 |
[16:31] | Dog always at the bottom. | 狗永远排在最后 |
[16:35] | As you can imagine, I get asked to help, | 大伙都知道 我经常被邀请 |
[16:38] | Uh, with a lot of these environmental causes. | 去帮忙解决些环境问题 |
[16:40] | Usually, I buy a ticket, | 通常 我只是买张票 |
[16:41] | Uh, bid on Shaquille O’Neal’s big shoe… | 买双奥尼尔的战靴 |
[16:46] | and, uh, come home. | 完事儿就回家了 |
[16:48] | But then, something happened. | 但后来发生了件事儿 |
[16:52] | I love paddle surfing. | 我爱好腹板冲浪 |
[16:54] | And each time I’d go out, I’d see this one sea lion. | 每次出海 我都能碰到一头海狮 |
[16:57] | He’d pop his head up. He’d check me out. | 它抬起头 看着我玩 |
[16:59] | I got so used to seeing him, I even named him–Snorkels. | 我都习以为常了 甚至给它起了个名字 斯诺克斯 |
[17:02] | Oh, god, I do not like where this is going. | 天呐 我不喜欢故事的发展路线 |
[17:04] | So one day, I, uh, I go out and I see Snorkels. | 有一天 我出海碰到了斯诺克斯 |
[17:09] | But he’s doing this weird twisting thing in the water. | 但它在水里奇怪地扭着身体 |
[17:11] | Oh, god. Oh, god. Oh, god. | 苍天呐 天呐 天呐 |
[17:15] | So I paddle over, and I see he’s got a plastic grocery bag, | 于是我划过去 发现有个塑料袋 |
[17:19] | wrapped around his neck and one of his fins. | 将他的脖子和鳍勒在一起 |
[17:22] | And I freaked, tried to get it off with my paddle. | 我慌了 想方设法用船桨去帮他扯开 |
[17:26] | It didn’t work, so I-I jumped in, | 但那不管用 于是我跳下水 |
[17:29] | But he disappeared under the water. And, uh… | 可惜的是他已经沉入水中 之后 |
[17:32] | Don’t say it. Don’t you dare say it. | 别说了 求你别说下去了 |
[17:34] | And I never saw him again. | 之后我就再也没见到他 |
[17:39] | This is the saddest thing I’ve ever– | 绝对是我听过的最悲伤的故事 |
[17:44] | Mitchell, are you okay? | 米奇尔 你没事吧 |
[17:46] | Of course I’m not okay. | 怎么可能没事 |
[17:48] | None of this is okay. | 一切都那么糟糕郁闷 |
[17:50] | Okay, well, you need to pull yourself together. | 好吧 你得忍住了 |
[17:52] | ’cause we’re at your boss’ house. | 我们正在你老板家呢 |
[17:53] | He drowned, Cam! | 他淹死了 小卡 |
[17:56] | Is he all right? | 他没事吧 |
[17:57] | Yeah, yeah, I just think he needs a little air. | 没事 没事 我觉得他需要点新鲜空气 |
[17:59] | You know who else needed air? | 你知道谁还需要新鲜空气吗 |
[18:01] | Snorkels! | 斯诺克斯 |
[18:04] | Excuse me. | 抱歉 |
[18:06] | Snorkels?! Where are you, Snorkels?! | 斯诺克斯 你在哪里 斯诺克斯 |
[18:09] | Mitchell, get back here! | 米奇尔 快回来 |
[18:11] | Oh, Snorkels! | 噢 斯诺克斯 |
[18:12] | Mitchell, what is wrong with you?! | 米奇尔 你这是怎么了 |
[18:14] | What do you think is wrong with me? I’m starving! | 你以为我怎么了 我饿坏了 |
[18:17] | Well, if you’re starving, then just eat something! | 好吧 如果你饿了 就吃些东西吧 |
[18:20] | I can’t eat something because then you’ll get mad at me, | 我不能吃东西 因为你会生我的气 |
[18:23] | And we’re at my boss’ house! | 而且我们现在在我老板家 |
[18:25] | I’m not gonna get mad at you! | 我不会生你的气 |
[18:27] | I appreciate what you’re doing for me! | 我很感谢你为我做的一切 |
[18:30] | I’m doing it for you. | 我所做的一切也都是为了你 |
[18:31] | Oh, you don’t have to do anything for me. | 不 你不需要为我减肥 |
[18:33] | I love you just the way you are. | 我就喜欢原原本本真实的你 |
[18:34] | I love you just the way you are. | 我也喜欢原原本本真实的你 |
[18:41] | – I got you! – Okay. Okay. | -我抓住你了 -好 好 |
[18:42] | – I got you, babe! – Thank you. | -我抓住你了 亲爱的 -谢谢 |
[18:43] | I got you! | 我抓住你了 |
[18:45] | – Cam. – I got you! | -小卡 -我抓住你了 |
[18:46] | I can walk. I can walk. | 脚能够到地 我自己站起来 |
[18:48] | I think Mitchell may just be a work friend. | 或许跟米奇尔只能做同事 无法做朋友 |
[18:57] | I let down my Mom and Dad today, and… Worse than that, | 今天我让爸妈失望了 更糟糕的是 |
[19:02] | I let down my teacher. | 我也让老师失望了 |
[19:04] | It’s all my fault. | 都是我的错 |
[19:05] | Everything I touch turns to detention. | 跟我沾边的都得挨罚 |
[19:07] | I’m sorry, Mom. | 对不起 妈妈 |
[19:09] | Me, too. | 我也是 |
[19:11] | Oh, I don’t really have | 算了吧 我今天也没法 |
[19:12] | a whole lot of moral high ground to stand on. | 站在什么道德高度上去说教你们了 |
[19:14] | I wasn’t exactly my best self today either. | 我自己也搞砸了 |
[19:17] | All in all, not a great day for the Dunphys. | 总之 今天邓菲家族集体触霉头 |
[19:21] | Come on, Dad! Believe in yourself! | 加油老爸 相信你自己 |
[19:24] | You’re making the impossible unimpossible. | 你让一切不可能变得可能 |
[19:28] | Phil. Oh, my god. | 菲尔 天呐 |
[19:30] | Don’t even bother. He’s in the zone. | 你省省吧 他正”闭关”呢 |
[19:32] | He can’t hear you. | 他听不见你 |
[19:34] | Go, Dad! | 加油 爸爸 |
[19:35] | You got this! | 你能行的 |
[19:38] | All week long, I’d been telling my girls how to act | 一周来 我教育女儿都是在空口说白话 |
[19:41] | instead of showing them. | 而不是言传身教 |
[19:42] | But not Phil. | 但菲尔不是 |
[19:44] | Phil could have said, | 菲尔本可以说 |
[19:45] | “Alex, relax. Don’t take everything so seriously.” | 艾丽克斯 放松点 别什么事都太较真 |
[19:48] | Or “Haley, challenge yourself. Don’t give up so easily.” | 或者 海莉 尝试挑战 别轻易放弃 |
[19:52] | But instead of talking the talk, Phil walked the walk. | 但菲尔没有选择言语教导 而是采取实际行动 |
[19:57] | And isn’t that what we’re supposed to do | 这难道不正是我们应该 |
[19:59] | for the people we love? | 为所爱之人做的吗 |
[20:05] | It’s definitely a challenge… | 虽然是个挑战 |
[20:11] | But Phil made it look easy, | 但菲尔让它看起来很简单 |
[20:13] | 7 feet off the ground. | 七尺之上 |
[20:18] | You’re awesome! | 你太棒了 |
[20:19] | Oh, my goodness! | 天呐 我做到了 |
[20:21] | Turns out, I’ve had my super Dunphy all along. | 原来 超级邓菲一直都在我身边 |
[20:27] | Oh, I know. | 我知道 |
[20:29] | What was on my mind as I was walking across that wire? | 我走钢丝的时候脑子里想着什么 |
[20:32] | I kept thinking, if I can do this, | 我一直在想 如果我能走钢丝 |
[20:37] | Then I’ve got two ways of getting across my yard. | 我就有两种方式穿过我家院子了 |
[20:43] | Did you have fun? | 你玩得高兴吗 |
[20:44] | Yes. She’s the cutest dog in the whole world. | 嗯 她是世界上最可爱的狗狗 |
[20:47] | Yeah, I heard you the first time. | 够了 你第一次说的时候我就听见了 |
[20:49] | Let’s go find your Daddies. | 我们去找你爸爸们吧 |
[20:50] | We’re in here! | 我们在这儿呢 |
[20:53] | Oh, my god. These cupcakes a so good. | 天呐 蛋糕真是太好吃了 |
[20:55] | I’m so sorry. We helped ourselves. | 抱歉 我们自己拿着吃了 |
[20:56] | We were so hungry. They are delicious. | 我们太饿了 这些蛋糕太美味了 |
[20:59] | I love that they’re not too sweet, you know? | 话说我很喜欢甜而不腻的口味 |
[21:01] | They taste almost like pate. | 吃起来有点像小馅饼 |
[21:04] | You know, I mean… | 我的意思是说 |
[21:05] | But why are you eating? | 你们怎么吃东西了 |
[21:06] | We’ve been on a juice cleanse. | 我们之前在节食减肥呢 |
[21:08] | You need to mind your own business, sweetie, for right now. | 你先自己一边儿玩去吧 亲爱的 |