| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Hey, buddy. | 兄弟 |
| [00:03] | Nothing! | 没干什么 |
| [00:04] | Sorry. Habit. | 不好意思 习惯了 |
| [00:06] | I’m not actually doing anything wrong. | 我没在做什么不该做的 |
| [00:07] | Just checking to see if I got into A.S.U. | 只是在看亚利桑那州立大学有没有录取我 |
| [00:09] | Without us?! | 不跟我们一起看吗 |
| [00:10] | Guys, get in here! | 大伙 快过来 |
| [00:12] | It’s happening! | 就是现在 |
| [00:14] | Phil saw videos online | 菲尔在网上看了个视频 |
| [00:15] | of families celebrating the moment their kid got into college. | 全家人一起庆祝孩子被大学录取的一刻 |
| [00:18] | For pure drama, you can’t beat that thing | 当全家人紧张的期待 |
| [00:20] | when an entire family’s nervous anticipation | 变成无比的喜悦爆发出来的时刻太赞了 |
| [00:23] | turns into an explosion of utter joy. | 简直无与伦比 |
| [00:25] | – Come on! – Come on, N-Y… | -来吧 -来吧 纽约大学 |
| [00:28] | Notre… | 圣母大 |
| [00:30] | …Damn. | 学个鬼啊 |
| [00:31] | All righty, here we go. | 好了 开始吧 |
| [00:33] | And record and… | 开始录像 |
| [00:36] | “Welcome to Arizona State”… | “欢迎进入亚利桑那州” |
| [00:38] | – It’s happening! – Oh, my God! | -真的录取了 -我的天啊 |
| [00:40] | “Welcome to Arizona State’s admissions portal. | “欢迎进入亚利桑那州立大学招生门户 |
| [00:43] | “We regret to inform you”… | 我们很遗憾地通知您” |
| [00:45] | Aww, pal… | 伙计 |
| [00:47] | Well, don’t leave us in suspense. | 别搞悬念了 |
| [00:48] | What did they say? | 到底被录取没有 |
| [01:03] | Hey, I just peeked in on Lily, | 我刚刚看了一眼莉莉 |
| [01:04] | and guess who she was curled up with on her bed? | 你猜是谁蜷在她床上陪她睡觉 |
| [01:07] | If it’s not the cat, I’m gonna be really upset about | 如果不是咱家的猫 我会因为你拿 |
| [01:09] | how you’re teasing this out. | 这件事开玩笑而感到十分担忧 |
| [01:10] | I love that she has a pet that she’s close to | 她能有只亲近的宠物我很开心 |
| [01:13] | like I was with my pet pig Lily. | 就像当初我和我的宠物猪莉莉一样 |
| [01:15] | Still no guilt, I see, after tricking me into | 骗我给咱女儿取了培根的名字 |
| [01:17] | naming our daughter after bacon. | 看来你至今仍不觉得内疚 |
| [01:18] | I was very close to that pig. | 我和那只宠物猪很亲近的 |
| [01:20] | For heaven’s sakes, | 无论如何 |
| [01:21] | I still have her ashes in the garage. | 我至今还把她的骨灰放在车库里 |
| [01:23] | True. | 是啊 |
| [01:24] | I recently started exercising in the garage, | 我最近开始在车库里健身 |
| [01:26] | and on the first day, I, uh — | 在第一天 我 |
| [01:28] | I dropped a couple of pounds. | 我就”掉”了好几斤 |
| [01:35] | I knew Mitchell was lying. | 我早知道米奇尔在骗我 |
| [01:36] | I was just giving him the opportunity to come clean. | 我只是给他个机会向我坦白 |
| [01:40] | I had discovered the urn was empty. | 我早就发现骨灰瓮空了 |
| [01:48] | Lily? | 莉莉 |
| [01:49] | You know, I was thinking tonight | 你知道吗 我在想 |
| [01:50] | maybe we could bury the ashes in the back yard | 今晚从你爸那回来后 |
| [01:52] | after we get back from your dad’s. | 或许我们能把骨灰在后院下葬 |
| [01:54] | It’s a perfect night to pay tribute. | 今晚悼念她再合适不过了 |
| [01:55] | – W-Why? – The Pig Moon. | -为什么 -今晚是猪月 |
| [01:58] | I’m sorry? One more time. | 不好意思 再说一次 |
| [01:59] | The Pig Moon. | 猪月 |
| [02:00] | Every 18 years, the moon takes on a pink hue, | 每隔十八年 月亮会发出肉粉色的光晕 |
| [02:03] | and it aligns with Orion. | 并与猎户座连成一线 |
| [02:04] | Oh. It’s a huge deal back home. | 在我们老家是件大事 |
| [02:06] | There’s a festival, | 我们会办庆祝活动 |
| [02:07] | they empty out all the jails as a sign of goodwill. | 所有监狱都会大赦 以示善意 |
| [02:09] | So, we’re having, like, a ceremony tonight? | 所以我们今晚要办个仪式之类的吗 |
| [02:11] | Yes, sweetie. | 是的 宝贝 |
| [02:12] | But don’t we have grandpa’s? | 但我们不是要去爷爷家吗 |
| [02:14] | Well, you know what? | 没关系的 |
| [02:15] | We’re always looking for a credible reason to leave early. | 反正我们总是在找可信的借口好早点离开 |
| [02:17] | So, what are we supposed to say? | 那到时我们该怎么说 |
| [02:18] | “No — no dessert for us. We got to get home. | “我们不吃甜点了 得早点回家 |
| [02:20] | We got to bury the 25-year-old ashes | 我们得把一头德国名种老母猪 |
| [02:22] | of a Brunswick King sow.” | 25年的陈年骨灰埋了” |
| [02:23] | Wow. Nice attitude. | 态度真不错 |
| [02:25] | It’s almost like you want Pig Moon John | 就像你故意想让猪月约翰老人 |
| [02:27] | to fill your hunting boot with coal. | 在你的狩猎靴里装满煤块似的 |
| [02:31] | This is so slow! | 这也太慢了 |
| [02:33] | If you’re on the Pritchett’s Closets website, | 如果你在浏览普里契特衣柜的网页 |
| [02:34] | we’re aware of the slowdown. | 我们已经知道加载速度慢的事了 |
| [02:36] | It’s either a hack by the Chinese | 要么是被黑客黑了 |
| [02:37] | or that Chinese hack I hired to fix the website. | 要么是我雇来改善网页的坑货[黑客]搞的 |
| [02:40] | No, I’m trying to get tickets | 不是 我是在买格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡 |
| [02:40] | 美国知名女歌手 出生于古巴 是她将拉丁音乐打进美国市场 | |
| [02:41] | for tonight’s Gloria Estefan concert. | 今晚演唱会的门票 |
| [02:44] | That’s a little on the nose. | 这有点太巧了吧 |
| [02:45] | Mom, it happened again! | 妈 又变成这样啦 |
| [02:48] | Jay, sit down here and pay attention. | 杰 你坐在这仔细盯着 |
| [02:50] | Ugh! You have to move fast when it’s your turn, | 等轮到你的时候必须迅速出手 |
| [02:52] | or they’ll move to the next person. | 不然他们就转到下一个人了 |
| [02:54] | Joe, this is exactly why we’re not giving you a knife | 乔 这就是为什么我们要等到你6岁 |
| [02:58] | until you turn 6 years old. | 才让你玩刀 |
| [03:00] | I missed the days | 我真怀念那些 |
| [03:00] | when people stood in actual lines. | 人们得实际去排队的日子 |
| [03:03] | If you weren’t willing to stand in the rain, | 如果你不愿意在下雨天站着苦等 |
| [03:04] | you didn’t get to see Gary Puckett & the Union Gap. | 你就没资格去看加里·帕克特与联盟峡 |
| [03:13] | Ow! Damn it! | 我靠 |
| [03:14] | What? It was one second! | 什么 我才走神一秒 |
| [03:17] | Okay, give it back to me. | 好了 给我吧 |
| [03:18] | No need. I got ’em. | 不用了 我买完了 |
| [03:20] | Oh, really? And you paid? | 真的吗 你付完款了吗 |
| [03:21] | Yeah, you got your browser | 付了 用浏览器 |
| [03:22] | filling out your credit card info. | 填一下信用卡信息 |
| [03:24] | It’s not super secure, | 其实这样不太安全 |
| [03:25] | but, whoever steals them | 不过不论卡被谁偷了 |
| [03:26] | will probably spend less than you. | 他可能都没你花得多 |
| [03:27] | Oh, what a B-U-tiful morning. | 多波美丽的早上啊 |
| [03:29] | I joke because I’ve been accepted to B.U. | 开个玩笑 因为我被波士顿大学录取了 |
| [03:31] | Oh, Manny, I’m so proud of you! | 曼尼 我真为你骄傲 |
| [03:34] | I’m six for six. | 目前六所学校都录取我了 |
| [03:35] | So many suitors — not sure which to choose from. | 这么多追求者 真不知道该选谁 |
| [03:38] | I feel like Lady Mary | 我觉得自己就像 |
| [03:39] | in the last season of “Downton Abbey.” | 上一季《唐顿庄园》里的大小姐玛丽 |
| [03:40] | I’d avoid the big football schools. | 我要是你就不选以美式足球闻名的学校 |
| [03:42] | And tonight we’re going to celebrate. | 今晚我们要去庆祝一下 |
| [03:44] | We’re going to a concert. | 我们要去看演唱会 |
| [03:45] | I got the tickets online. | 我在网上买好票了 |
| [03:46] | Easier than buying them at the venue, I guess. | 网上是比去会场买方便些吧 |
| [03:48] | What is the venue, uh, by the way? | 会场在哪啊 随口一问 |
| [03:50] | You can’t buy them at the door. | 不能去会场门口买的 |
| [03:52] | It’s a private concert. | 是私人演唱会 |
| [03:52] | It’s just for the fan club. | 只有粉丝俱乐部的人才能买票 |
| [03:54] | I remember our first | 我还记得我们第一次去 |
| [03:55] | Gloria Estefan concert. | 格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡的演唱会 |
| [03:56] | You were so little, | 那时你还那么小 |
| [03:58] | sitting on my shoulders, holding the lighter. | 坐在我的肩膀上 举着打火机 |
| [04:02] | I’m gonna leave. | 我要走了 |
| [04:03] | Yes, before I know it. | 是啊 一转眼就要离我而去了 |
| [04:05] | No, right now. | 不 是现在要出门 |
| [04:06] | I obviously need something to wear tonight. | 我需要买件新衣服今晚穿 |
| [04:08] | Oh, okay. I’ll go with you. | 好 我和你一起去 |
| [04:09] | What a great idea. Go! Make a day of it. | 多好的主意 去吧 好好玩一天 |
| [04:11] | No, wait, wait, wait — | 不行 等一下 |
| [04:12] | I can’t go to the mall wearing my house heels. | 我不能穿在家穿的高跟鞋去商场 |
| [04:15] | What a good excuse to buy a nice pair of new ones. | 那不正是买新鞋的好理由吗 |
| [04:18] | That’s why I love you. | 这就是为什么我这么爱你 |
| [04:21] | Always remember that. | 什么时候都别忘了这点 |
| [04:24] | Thank you so much, Mrs. Pasternak. | 太感谢您了 派太太 |
| [04:26] | I’m sure you’re wondering why I want these ashes. | 我想您肯定很好奇我为什么向您要骨灰吧 |
| [04:28] | Not really, | 并没有 |
| [04:29] | but I’m gonna need the urn back. | 但你得把骨灰瓮还给我 |
| [04:30] | I’m gonna turn it into a lamp. | 我要把它改造成台灯 |
| [04:40] | – Hello, Mitchell. – Oh, God! | -你好啊 米奇尔 -天啊 |
| [04:44] | Is everything okay? | 你没事吧 |
| [04:44] | You’re looking a little ashen. | 你看起来”灰”头土脸的 |
| [04:46] | I’m fine. I-I-I accidentally spilled pig Lily’s ashes, | 我没事 我不小心把猪莉莉的骨灰弄撒了 |
| [04:49] | and I-I thought that I would — | 我本来打算 |
| [04:51] | You would just replace them with Morris Pasternak’s? | 你打算用派先生的骨灰偷梁换柱 |
| [04:54] | How’d you know? | 你怎么知道 |
| [04:54] | His class ring is by your foot. | 他的毕业戒指就在你脚边 |
| [04:56] | Oh, yeah. That pig was my best friend. | 那只宠物猪曾是我最好的朋友 |
| [04:58] | Didn’t you eat her mother? | 她妈不是被你吃掉的吗 |
| [05:00] | You know, you have no respect for anything that’s important to me. | 你根本毫不尊重那些对我重要的事物 |
| [05:03] | My whole upbringing is just a big joke to you. | 我的整个成长过程对你而言就是个大笑话 |
| [05:10] | Dad, I was thinking about the Pig Moon funeral tonight | 大爸 我刚刚在想今晚的猪月葬礼 |
| [05:13] | and how important Lily was to you. | 还有猪莉莉对你有多重要 |
| [05:16] | Aww, that is so sweet. | 你太贴心了 |
| [05:18] | You definitely inherited her compassion. | 你绝对继承了她的同情心 |
| [05:20] | Remember that finger painting that I made of her, | 你记得我画的那幅猪莉莉的手指画吗 |
| [05:22] | the one that you said that was museum quality? | 你说够格在博物馆展出的那幅 |
| [05:24] | Can we bury it with her? | 能把画和骨灰一起下葬吗 |
| [05:25] | I know exactly where it is. | 我清楚记得画在哪 |
| [05:28] | I know exactly where it was. | 我清楚记得画本来在哪 |
| [05:40] | It’s an e-mail for Luke from my alma mater. | 是我母校给卢克发来的电邮 |
| [05:42] | – Let’s get him! – Oh, no, no! | -快把他叫来 -先别 |
| [05:43] | No, what if it’s more bad news? | 别叫 万一是坏消息呢 |
| [05:44] | Maybe you should read it first. | 或许你该先读一下 |
| [05:46] | Claire, I am as anxious as you are | 克莱尔 我和你一样等不及想知道 |
| [05:48] | to find out if he’s gonna be a Bulldog like his old man, | 他会不会和他爸一样成为斗牛犬的一员 |
| [05:50] | but we can’t violate his trust. | 但我们不能侵犯他对我们的信任 |
| [05:52] | Sure, we could mark it as unread to cover our tracks, | 虽然我们可以重新标记为未读来湮灭证据 |
| [05:54] | but we’d know — | 但我们心知肚明… |
| [05:55] | He didn’t get in. | 他没被录取 |
| [05:56] | What?! He’s a legacy! | 什么 他比别人都强 |
| [05:58] | Bulldog drool courses through his jowls! | 斗牛犬对他垂涎三尺 |
| [06:01] | I know, and it’s his seventh rejection. | 我知道 而且这是他第七次被拒了 |
| [06:03] | He’s gonna be so disappointed. | 他会特别失望的 |
| [06:05] | And embarrassed. We have that dinner at Jay’s tonight. | 也会难堪 我们今晚在杰家聚餐 |
| [06:07] | I bet Manny got in everywhere. | 我打赌曼尼被所有学校录取了 |
| [06:09] | Oh, God. | 老天 |
| [06:11] | Is this it? | 到此为止了吗 |
| [06:12] | I mean, is Luke not going to college? | 卢克上不成大学了吗 |
| [06:13] | It’s not over. | 还没完 |
| [06:15] | Delete. | 删除 |
| [06:16] | What are you doing? | 你要做什么 |
| [06:17] | I’m driving up there to tell them they made a mistake. | 我要开车去那里 告诉他们这是错误的决定 |
| [06:19] | They’d be lucky to have a kid like Luke. | 收一个像卢克这样的学生是他们走运 |
| [06:21] | Well, I guess it — it can’t hurt. | 应该坏不到哪里去 |
| [06:22] | I mean, it’s not like they can super reject him. | 他们又不能”超级”拒收 |
| [06:25] | Although, Michigan did use that exact term. | 虽然密歇根大学的确用了这词 |
| [06:31] | You’re on Caliente 96.3 with Diego and The Donkey. | 这里是96.3潮流台 我们是迪亚哥与傻驴 |
| [06:34] | Hello! Yes! | 你好 太棒了 |
| [06:35] | I’m calling about the Gloria Estefan tickets. | 我打来是想获得格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡的票 |
| [06:38] | And they’re all yours if you can complete this lyric — | 只要你能接上下面的歌词 票就归你了 |
| [06:40] | “Turn the blank around.” | 扭转”啥啥” |
| [06:42] | One of her biggest hits from the ’90s. | 她在90年代最火的歌之一 |
| [06:44] | We’ve been playing it all morning. | 我们今早一直在放 |
| [06:45] | – “Turn the car around.” – Nope. Two more guesses. | -“扭转车…” -不对 还有两次机会 |
| [06:48] | “Turn the boat around.” | “扭转船” |
| [06:49] | Try again. | 再试一次 |
| [06:50] | “Turn the economy around”! | “扭转经济” |
| [06:53] | You’re an ass. | 你个蠢驴 |
| [06:55] | Damn it! | 靠 |
| [06:58] | I just got super accepted to Michigan. | 我被密歇根大学”超级录取”了 |
| [07:01] | He’s the second Delgado to go to college. | 他是迪尔加多家族第二个上大学的人 |
| [07:03] | My cousin went to the best medical school in Colombia. | 我表哥进了哥伦比亚最好的医学院 |
| [07:07] | They would not just accept any cadaver. | 那里可不是什么尸体都收的 |
| [07:09] | Okay, Mom, let’s go. | 行了 妈 我们走 |
| [07:10] | Oh, yeah, but wait. | 好 不过先等下 |
| [07:11] | You remember when your head was this tiny? | 还记得你脑袋这么小的时候吗 |
| [07:14] | Okay. Mom, Mom, I think I’m set for hats. | 行了 妈 我不缺帽子 |
| [07:17] | I know when a female’s about to burst into tears. | 女人想大哭时 我看得出来 |
| [07:19] | I’ve seen it enough times. | 我看过够多次了 |
| [07:20] | I had to keep my mom away | 我得让我妈远离 |
| [07:22] | from anything that reminded her I was moving away | 任何会让她想到我要离开的东西 |
| [07:24] | and keep myself away from Williams Sonoma. | 也让我自己远离厨房用品店 |
| [07:27] | I could lose an afternoon. | 我可能会耗掉整个下午在里面 |
| [07:30] | A pet store. These are fun. | 宠物店 又萌又有趣 |
| [07:31] | I think he misses his mommy. | 我觉得它想妈妈了 |
| [07:33] | He’ll forget about her by the time we get to the car. | 我们走到车边时它估计就忘掉妈妈吗 |
| [07:35] | On second thought, let’s catch a movie. | 再一想 我们去看电影吧 |
| [07:37] | They always help keep your mind off of things. | 电影总能让人忘了烦恼 |
| [07:43] | Wait, Officer — No! | 等等 警官 不要 |
| [07:44] | My car is only here because I was being responsible! | 我的车停在这里是因为我是负责任的人 |
| [07:46] | I was babysitting my uncle Joe | 我负责照看我舅乔 |
| [07:48] | and got too drunk to drive home! | 结果喝得太醉不能开车回家了 |
| [07:51] | What is this thing?! | 这是什么鬼东西 |
| [07:53] | The Barnacle. | 挡风玻璃锁 |
| [07:55] | They stick it on your car when you have unpaid parking tickets. | 没交停车罚单 警察就把它贴你车上 |
| [07:58] | I couldn’t let my parents see it, | 我不能让爸妈看到 |
| [07:59] | because I knew they’d just overreact | 因为我知道他们会小题大做 |
| [08:00] | and lecture me about being irresponsible, | 给我讲一堆要负责的大道理 |
| [08:02] | and I couldn’t pay to remove it | 我也不能付罚单移除这东西 |
| [08:03] | because I just maxed out my credit card | 因为我刚刷爆了信用卡 |
| [08:05] | on these insanely expensive pair of sunglasses. | 买了副超贵的太阳镜 |
| [08:08] | I don’t love ’em. | 我也不想 |
| [08:13] | I just had to re-create Lily’s painting of Pig Lily, | 我只要重新画一张莉莉的猪莉莉画 |
| [08:16] | and she’d be none the wiser. | 她就不会知道那件事 |
| [08:17] | Oh, it’s like painting with sausages. | 天 就像用香肠画画似的 |
| [08:22] | Sorry, Cam, no pig painting by Lily here. | 抱歉 小卡 这里没有莉莉画的小猪画 |
| [08:24] | I do have some random scribbles | 不过有一些涂鸦 |
| [08:26] | that Luke made when he was… | 是卢克还小的时候画… |
| [08:28] | Huh, that’s a little later than I’d hoped. | 好像是比我希望的岁数还大些时画的 |
| [08:31] | Fine. Not a word of this to Mitchell. | 好 这事绝不能告诉米奇尔 |
| [08:33] | I’m sure you’re curious why. | 我知道你好奇原因 |
| [08:34] | Wrong again. | 你又错了 |
| [08:39] | Hi. You’re the first one here. | 你是第一个到的 |
| [08:39] | Don’t worry. We don’t have to make conversation. | 别担心 我们不必闲聊的 |
| [08:41] | Ooh! A scrapbook! | 剪贴簿 |
| [08:43] | Aww, look at this. | 瞧瞧 |
| [08:45] | All of our old school projects — | 我们小时候的学校作业都在 |
| [08:47] | paintings by me and Claire. | 我和克莱尔画的画 |
| [08:49] | Aww! You’re just a big softie, aren’t ‘cha? | 你就是个豆腐心啊 |
| [08:50] | My lawyer’s secretary put that together | 我律师的秘书整的 |
| [08:52] | for my image at the divorce trial. | 为了提升我在离婚法庭上的形象 |
| [08:54] | There’s the old bear. Grr! | 还是原来强硬的熊爸 |
| [08:57] | Oh, this is from my 8th birthday. | 这是我八岁生日时照的 |
| [08:58] | I made Mom throw a party with a whole farm theme. | 我让妈给我办了场农场主题的派对 |
| [09:01] | You know what? I need this. | 猜怎么着 我需要这张照片 |
| [09:02] | Cam thinks I look down on his farm life. | 小卡觉得我看不起他的农场生活 |
| [09:04] | – This’ll prove to him that… – Bup, bup, bup. | -这能证明给他看… -停停停 |
| [09:06] | This comes with a price. | 要照片得付出代价 |
| [09:07] | You can get me Gloria Estefan tickets, right? | 你能给我弄到格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡的票吧 |
| [09:08] | Dad, that is offensive. | 爸 这话有点冒犯人 |
| [09:10] | Not every gay person is connected to Gloria Estefan. | 不是所有同性恋都跟她有交情 |
| [09:13] | But you are, right? | 但你有 对吧 |
| [09:14] | It’s complicated. | 情况很复杂 |
| [09:16] | Cam briefly dated a member | 小卡曾和格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡的 |
| [09:17] | of Gloria Estefan’s band, The Miami Sound Machine. | 迈阿密之音乐队的一员约过会 |
| [09:20] | He doesn’t talk about it much. | 他不常提起 |
| [09:21] | Just whenever someone mentions her or Miami. | 也就有人提到她或迈阿密就说吧 |
| [09:25] | Or humidity. | 还有湿度 |
| [09:27] | Well… | 就这样 |
| [09:28] | when I get the tickets, you get the picture. | 一手给票 一手给照片 |
| [09:30] | Mean! | 小气 |
| [09:33] | Um, how would you feel about asking Cam to use his connections | 你愿不愿意请小卡动用他的关系 |
| [09:36] | to get two Gloria Estefan tickets for tonight | 弄到两张今晚看格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡的票 |
| [09:38] | and then secretly giving them to me? | 然后偷偷给我 |
| [09:39] | I’ll do it, | 我愿意做 |
| [09:40] | but I need you to help me with my car first. | 但你要先帮我办车的事 |
| [09:42] | I’d ask my parents, but — | 我可以找我爸妈 但… |
| [09:44] | They wouldn’t understand. It’s not your fault. | 他们不会理解 这不是你的错 |
| [09:45] | Yeah. Okay. Let’s go. | 行 我们快去 |
| [09:48] | Are we sure this is the best way to do this? | 你确定这是最好的办法吗 |
| [09:50] | All we have to do is make sure that my parents don’t see it | 我们只需要确保我爸妈不会看到它 |
| [09:53] | by moving it down the street. | 我们往前开点就行了 |
| [09:54] | – Okay? Hold on. – I’m your eyes. | -懂吗 抓好 -我就是你的眼 |
| [09:55] | Hug the curb. | 沿着路边 |
| [09:56] | Haley, just — all right. Straighten out. | 海莉… 好吧 直着开 |
| [09:58] | T-Turn on your hazards. | 开启危险警告灯 |
| [10:00] | – That’s the windshield wiper! – You’re on my leg! Move! | -那是雨刷 -你踩到我腿了 挪开 |
| [10:02] | Oh, God! There’s a tree. | 天啊 有棵树… |
| [10:05] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [10:06] | Let’s just breathe, let’s take a moment… | 我们先喘口气 等一下 |
| [10:08] | Can you just get off my leg, please? | 你能从我腿上挪开吗 |
| [10:09] | I’m not — I’m s– I’m not — | 对不… 我没有… |
| [10:11] | – Are we going backwards? – You put us in reverse. | -我们在往后吗 -你挂了倒车档 |
| [10:12] | Okay, hit the brake. | 踩刹车 |
| [10:14] | That is the gas! | 那是油门 |
| [10:15] | How do you have a license?! | 你驾照是怎么考的啊 |
| [10:17] | I can’t move! You’re on my leg! | 我动不了 你压到我腿了 |
| [10:21] | Okay. Good first try. | 好了 第一次尝试还不错 |
| [10:24] | Can’t believe you didn’t treat yourself to a Bulldog Blast. | 不敢相信你不来杯斗牛犬冰沙 |
| [10:27] | Isn’t that basically just sugar, ice, | 那不就是糖 冰 |
| [10:29] | and the stuff they you use to cover the Blue Man Group? | 还有用来涂蓝人乐队的蓝油漆吗 |
| [10:32] | We’re here to see the Dean of Admissions. | 我们来见招生办主任 |
| [10:34] | We called. We’re the Dunphys. | 我们来过电话 邓菲家 |
| [10:35] | Ah. I’ll tell Dean Hinden you’re here. | 我会告诉欣登主任你们到了 |
| [10:37] | Um, eh — Hinden? | 欣登吗 |
| [10:39] | Yes. Dean Rudolf Hinden. | 是的 鲁道夫·欣登主任 |
| [10:42] | I have a bad feeling. | 我有不好的感觉 |
| [10:44] | Well, honey, you did just have two of those antifreezes. | 亲爱的 你的确刚喝了那像防冻剂的饮料 |
| [10:46] | No. | 不是啦 |
| [10:47] | Rudy Hinden — We were classmates. | 鲁迪·欣登 我们曾是同学 |
| [10:49] | Super annoying — always “on.” | 超烦人 总是很亢奋 |
| [10:52] | We cheered together, we — we tumbled together, | 我们都是拉拉队的 一起玩蹦床 |
| [10:54] | we rolled around together, | 一起四处玩 |
| [10:55] | but we were never close. | 但我们关系从不亲密 |
| [10:57] | When I say “Bull,” you say “Dog”! | 我说斗牛 你说犬 |
| [11:00] | – Bull! – Dog! | -斗牛 -犬 |
| [11:01] | – Bull! – Dog! | -斗牛 -犬 |
| [11:02] | Hey, Rudy! | 你好 鲁迪 |
| [11:02] | This is my wife Claire. | 这位是我太太克莱尔 |
| [11:04] | – Hi. – Pleasure. | -你好 -很荣幸 |
| [11:05] | Nice to meet you. | 很高兴认识你 |
| [11:07] | Well, please come on in. | 快请进吧 |
| [11:09] | – Oh! Great trampoline. – Thanks. | -蹦床不错啊 -谢谢 |
| [11:12] | I like to bounce at least 20 minutes a day. | 我习惯每天跳至少20分钟 |
| [11:14] | – It’s where I get my best ideas. – Okay. | -我的好点子都是在蹦跳中产生的 -好吧 |
| [11:16] | How quirky. | 真是个怪人啊 |
| [11:17] | Oh, hey, Phil, | 对了 菲尔 |
| [11:18] | where were Nationals senior year? | 当年的高年级比赛在哪里举行 |
| [11:20] | Cleveland, Oh– Hi-o! | 克利夫兰 俄”嗨”俄州 |
| [11:22] | Can you imagine putting up with this | 你能想象忍受这种怪胎 |
| [11:23] | – for years on end? – It’s hard. | -很多年的心情吗 -的确很难 |
| [11:25] | Tell you what, I’ll give it some bounce time | 这样吧 我去跳一会找灵感 |
| [11:27] | and hit you back with an answer. | 回头给你答复 |
| [11:29] | Listen, you seem busy. | 你好像挺忙的 |
| [11:31] | I’ll get straight to it. | 那我就直说了 |
| [11:32] | Our son Luke applied and didn’t get in, | 我们儿子卢克申请了这里 但没被录取 |
| [11:34] | and I think it’s worth reconsidering. | 我觉得你可以再考虑一下 |
| [11:36] | He’s a great kid. He’s just a late bloomer. | 他是个好孩子 只是大器晚成 |
| [11:38] | Okay. I think we can make something happen for your boy. | 好的 我应该能帮你儿子搞定这事 |
| [11:42] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [11:42] | Yeah, we’ve let in way worse applicants than him. | 是啊 比他更糟糕的学生我们也录取过了 |
| [11:45] | – Rudy! – Wha– | -鲁迪 -什… |
| [11:46] | – Thank you! You’re the B-E-S-T best! – Yeah. | -太谢谢了 你最木奉棒了 -是啊 |
| [11:49] | No problemo. | 不客气 |
| [11:50] | I’ll just, uh… | 我只要… |
| [11:54] | Hey. | 对了 |
| [11:55] | While you’re here, | 既然你都来了 |
| [11:56] | I’ve always wanted to ask you something. | 有件事我一直想问你 |
| [11:58] | You remember that magic trick you used to do | 你还记得以前你常表演的那个魔术吗 |
| [12:00] | where you got out of a straitjacket blindfolded? | 就是你蒙着眼从紧身服里挣脱出来那个 |
| [12:02] | Barnum’s Humbug. | 巴纳姆骗局 |
| [12:03] | Yeah. That one. | 对 就是那个 |
| [12:06] | How’d you do it? | 你是怎么做到的 |
| [12:07] | Magic. I-I feel like — | 用魔法 我觉得应该… |
| [12:08] | No, no, no, really — | 不不不 说真的 |
| [12:09] | I’ve been trying to figure it out for years. | 我已经试图破解这个魔术好几年了 |
| [12:12] | Um, I’m sorry. | 很抱歉 |
| [12:12] | It’s — It’s not customary | 按照惯例 |
| [12:13] | for a magician to reveal his secrets. | 魔术师不可以透露自己的手法 |
| [12:16] | It’s also not “customary” for a Dean of Admissions | 按照惯例 招生办主任也不应该 |
| [12:18] | to alter an applicant’s status, so… | 修改申请人的录取状态 所以… |
| [12:22] | I’ll go get the straitjacket from the nurse. | 我去护士那里拿紧身服过来 |
| [12:25] | You’re gonna do it, right? | 你会照做的吧 |
| [12:27] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [12:29] | Let me bounce on it. | 让我蹦一会想想 |
| [12:33] | Phil. | 菲尔 |
| [12:35] | Sweetheart? | 亲爱的 |
| [12:39] | Phil. Honey, Phil, you can’t possibly | 菲尔 亲爱的 这件事情 |
| [12:42] | be struggling with this decision. | 你还有什么好挣扎的 |
| [12:43] | Do you know what happens to magicians | 你知道透露魔术手法的魔术师 |
| [12:45] | who reveal their secrets, Claire? | 会有什么下场吗 克莱尔 |
| [12:46] | They’re shunned. | 会被唾弃 会被孤立 |
| [12:47] | Doesn’t that happen already? | 现实不已经是这样了吗 |
| [12:49] | Listen, I possess knowledge | 我掌握的知识 |
| [12:50] | passed down from the ancient Egyptian conjurers | 可是由古埃及巫师 |
| [12:52] | to the prestidigitators of the Dark Ages | 传给黑暗时代的变戏法人 |
| [12:53] | to the amateur illusionists of today. | 再传到今天的业余魔术师手上 |
| [12:55] | I am worried about another trick. | 我担心的是另一个戏法 |
| [12:56] | I am trying to make our son disappear | 我正努力把我们儿子”变”到 |
| [12:58] | to a barely accredited four-year college. | 一所勉强合格的四年制大学里 |
| [13:01] | – There he is. – Okay, here we are. | -他来了 -好了 我拿来了 |
| [13:03] | Why don’t you go ahead and put these on. | 你快点穿上吧 |
| [13:07] | No, no, no. In here. | 不不不 就在这里穿 |
| [13:09] | I want to make sure I get this. | 我想确保我能学会 |
| [13:10] | I want to see everything. | 我要看到一切细节 |
| [13:13] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [13:14] | Okay, I got it. | 好 我帮你拿着 |
| [13:18] | I didn’t quite grasp what I was asking Phil to do, | 我当时还没意识到我叫菲尔做的事有多严重 |
| [13:21] | but, um… | 不过… |
| [13:23] | it got weird. | 后来越变越怪了 |
| [13:24] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [13:25] | All right. Whenever you’re ready. | 好 你准备好就随时可以开始 |
| [13:27] | Wait, th-this isn’t going on the Internet, is it? | 等等 这不会被放到网上吧 |
| [13:29] | No, it’s just for me. | 不会 我自己看而已 |
| [13:30] | The challenge with this escape | 这套逃脱术的诀窍是 |
| [13:32] | is, uh, releasing the shackles in the correct order | 按正确顺序解开锁链 |
| [13:35] | baring yourself gradually. | 再慢慢从中挣脱出来 |
| [13:38] | – Okay, more upbeat. Do the patter. – What? | -再欢乐一点 要说台词 -什么 |
| [13:40] | I want to hear the old patter. | 我想听以前那套台词 |
| [13:43] | Blindfold him. | 蒙住他的眼睛 |
| [13:44] | – Take it. – Yes…sir. | -拿着 -是 长官 |
| [13:49] | Phil. | 菲尔 |
| [13:50] | Honey, you don’t have to do this. | 亲爱的 你不必这么做 |
| [13:53] | Luke can join the army. | 大不了卢克可以去参军 |
| [13:54] | It’s okay. | 没关系 |
| [13:55] | I may be locked up, but my mind is free. | 肉体虽被困住 但我心是自由的 |
| [13:57] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [13:59] | Imagine yourself in a museum | 想象你正在一个博物馆里 |
| [14:00] | filled with the world’s oddities. | 里面摆满了来自世界各地的奇异之物 |
| [14:02] | No, no, no, no. Slow down. | 不不不 慢一点说 |
| [14:04] | Enjoy it. | 享受过程 |
| [14:05] | And turn around | 转过去 |
| [14:06] | so I can get a good look at the back. | 我要看清楚背面 |
| [14:09] | Let me see the back. | 让我看背面[屁股] |
| [14:11] | Behold the freak | 屏息以待 |
| [14:14] | for all to see. | 奇事即将发生 |
| [14:20] | Go get my tickets. | 帮我拿到门票 |
| [14:22] | Is my hair a mess? | 我头发是不是很塌 |
| [14:23] | It’s so humid out. | 今天外面好潮湿 |
| [14:24] | You want to talk about humidity? | 你想讨论湿度吗 |
| [14:25] | I once spent a steamy weekend | 我曾经跟迈阿密之音乐队的 |
| [14:26] | with a certain member of the Miami Sound Machine. | 一位成员共度了一个很”湿”的周末 |
| [14:29] | That’s crazy! | 太巧了吧 |
| [14:30] | – Do you know that they’re in town tonight? – What? | -你知道他们今晚就在城里吗 -什么 |
| [14:32] | Can you get me two tickets? | 你能帮我弄两张票吗 |
| [14:34] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [14:35] | These hands — | 这双玉手 |
| [14:37] | they’re so small and delicate like a child. | 如此精致小巧 像孩子的手一样 |
| [14:39] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [14:40] | This watch came from an American Girl doll. | 这块手表本来是芭比娃娃戴的 |
| [14:42] | – Are you gonna hook me up or what? – Yes, yes. | -你到底能不能帮我搞到票 -可以 |
| [14:44] | Just as soon as you and your tiny little hands | 但你得先用那双小手 |
| [14:46] | re-create a painting for me. | 帮我重画一幅画 |
| [14:48] | This way. | 这边请 |
| [14:51] | What do you think? | 你觉得怎么样 |
| [14:52] | I was going for dark and mysterious, | 我追求的是阴暗神秘高冷风 |
| [14:53] | but I’m afraid I circled right back | 但恐怕还是回到了 |
| [14:54] | to cute and approachable. | 可爱亲切暖男风 |
| [14:57] | Oh, she’s so lucky. | 她真幸运 |
| [15:00] | He’s always gonna be her little boy. | 他永远都会是她的小宝贝 |
| [15:03] | Mom, you’re projecting on these mannequins. | 妈 你把自己的心情投射到假人身上了 |
| [15:05] | For all we know, he’s a little person, | 说不定他是个侏儒 |
| [15:06] | and that’s his wife who’s evolved enough | 而这位是他的老婆 有足够成熟的心 |
| [15:08] | to see how big he is on the inside. | 能看到他内心有多么高大 |
| [15:09] | Manny, I know what you’ve been | 曼尼 我知道你这一整天 |
| [15:11] | trying to do the whole day. | 都在打什么主意 |
| [15:12] | I am not about to have a breakdown | 我不会因为你要去上大学 |
| [15:14] | because you’re going to college. | 就精神崩溃 |
| [15:15] | I was awake last night when you were brushing my hair. | 你昨晚帮我梳头的时候 我其实没睡着 |
| [15:17] | Okay, yes, it’s going to be hard | 好吧 我的确是会很难受 |
| [15:19] | because you’re gonna be far away, | 因为你要去很远的地方 |
| [15:20] | so I’m not gonna get to see you all the time. | 我就不能常常见到你了 |
| [15:23] | But we’ll still talk on the phone. | 但我们还是会打电话啊 |
| [15:25] | Yeah, at the beginning, | 一开始会 |
| [15:26] | but then you’re gonna get busy, | 但接着你就会忙学业 |
| [15:27] | and then I am going to get busy. | 我也有自己的事要忙 |
| [15:29] | Too busy to take my calls? | 你会忙到接不了我的电话吗 |
| [15:31] | I have made peace with it. | 我已经想通了 |
| [15:32] | Your childhood days are over. | 你的童年时期已经结束了 |
| [15:34] | Guillermo, come back here! | 吉列尔莫 回来 |
| [15:37] | What are you doing? | 你在做什么 |
| [15:38] | Don’t run away from your mother. | 不要从你母亲身边跑走 |
| [15:39] | Life is going to tear you apart soon enough. | 很快生活就会迫使你们分别 |
| [15:41] | I want to go on the merry-go-round. | 我想去坐旋转木马 |
| [15:43] | Oh, you’re on it. | 你的人生就是走马灯 |
| [15:45] | You’ve got 10 years left with that woman. | 你和她只剩下十年的相处时间了 |
| [15:47] | Cherish them. Cherish her. | 珍惜这段时间 珍惜她 |
| [15:51] | Thanks? | 谢谢 |
| [15:53] | I think maybe I’m freaking out about going to school. | 似乎我才是因为要上大学而慌张的那个人 |
| [15:55] | I see that. | 我看到了 |
| [15:57] | But we’re gonna be okay. | 但我们会没事的 |
| [15:59] | Being apart is just gonna make nights like tonight, | 我们的分离只会让每个夜晚像今晚一样精彩 |
| [16:01] | going to a concert, even more special. | 去看演唱会 甚至更特别的 |
| [16:03] | – No! – Guillermo! | -不 -吉列尔莫 |
| [16:05] | I don’t want to! | 我不想去 |
| [16:06] | Okay, now it’s just bad parenting. | 这死小孩只是没家教罢了 |
| [16:09] | This is excellent work. | 这活儿太好了 |
| [16:10] | – Excellent work. – Really? | -太棒了 -真的吗 |
| [16:12] | I’m not used to hearing that. | 好不习惯听到这话啊 |
| [16:14] | I get why people try now. | 终于懂别人做事为何会努力了 |
| [16:15] | Is that my painting? | 那是我的画吗 |
| [16:16] | Why is it here? | 为什么在这里 |
| [16:18] | Um, oh, well, because it was on loan | 因为之前被借走了 |
| [16:20] | to your grandma and grandpa | 你祖父祖母借去摆了 |
| [16:21] | just like they do with real art. | 他们也这么借真艺术品 |
| [16:23] | Better than most of the stuff in this house. | 比这家里大多数的艺术品强多了 |
| [16:26] | Now get me those Gloria Esteban tickets. | 给我去弄格洛丽亚·埃斯特巴的票 |
| [16:27] | It’s Estefan. | 是埃斯特凡 |
| [16:29] | That’s what I said. I’m a huge fan. | 我就是这么说的啊 我可是脑残粉 |
| [16:30] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [16:32] | Carlos, Carlos. | 卡洛斯 卡洛斯 |
| [16:34] | Hey — hey, Carlos. | 你好 卡洛斯 |
| [16:36] | Um, this, uh, Cameron Tucker. | 我是卡梅隆·塔克 |
| [16:37] | I don’t know if you remember me or not. | 我也不确定你还记不记得我 |
| [16:39] | Oh, you — you do. | 你… 你记得啊 |
| [16:40] | Okay, hi. | 好久不见啊 |
| [16:42] | Yeah, wondering if I could get a couple tickets | 我能不能麻烦你帮我弄几张 |
| [16:44] | for the show tonight. | 今晚演出的票 |
| [16:46] | Gloria Estefan. | 格洛丽亚·埃斯特凡 |
| [16:49] | Because you’re in the Miami Sound Machine, silly. | 因为你是迈阿密之音乐队的成员啊 傻子 |
| [16:54] | What? | 什么 |
| [16:55] | It was loud in the bar the night I met Carlos, | 我遇到卡洛斯的那晚 酒吧很吵 |
| [16:58] | and it turns out he is not a member | 结果发现他并不是 |
| [17:00] | of the legendary band, the Miami Sound Machine. | 那个传奇乐队 迈阿密之音的成员 |
| [17:04] | He owns a mobile dog grooming business | 他有一个狗狗美容车的生意 |
| [17:06] | called Miami’s Hound Machine. | 名叫”迈阿狗之净” |
| [17:10] | In retrospect, I didn’t need to be as alarmed | 现在一看 我当时不该因他拥有 |
| [17:12] | with his collection of leashes and collars. | 这么多绳索与颈圈而起戒心 |
| [17:15] | Okay, everybody, gather round. | 大伙们聚过来 |
| [17:17] | Luke has one more college to hear from, | 卢克还有一家大学的回复没看 |
| [17:19] | and I got a good feeling about this one. | 我感觉这家挺有戏呢 |
| [17:21] | Yeah. | 对啊 |
| [17:22] | Mom, can we not do this here? | 妈 我们能别在这里看吗 |
| [17:23] | Oh, come on, have a little faith. | 没事啦 要有点信心 |
| [17:25] | Okay, cannon’s ready. And record. | 礼炮已备好 开始录制 |
| [17:27] | Record, got it. | 录 好了 |
| [17:28] | Any time, buddy. | 随时开始 小家伙 |
| [17:29] | All right, everyone, | 好啦各位 |
| [17:30] | get ready to tell me how I’m my own kind of smart | 准备好安慰我天生我材必有用 |
| [17:32] | and how everyone takes their own path. | 老天爷自有安排 |
| [17:36] | You’re a different kind of smart, and everyone… | 天生我材必有用 老天… |
| [17:38] | Kind of smart. Everybody takes their own path. | 必有用 老天爷自有安排 |
| [17:40] | I got in? | 我被录取啦 |
| [17:41] | What?! He got in! | 什么 他进啦 |
| [17:43] | He got in! | 他进啦 |
| [17:46] | You got in! What is wrong with this thing? | 你进啦 这玩意什么毛病 |
| [17:49] | Wait, this doesn’t make any sense. | 等等 这不科学啊 |
| [17:51] | I got rejected by worse schools than this. | 我都被更差的学校拒绝过了 |
| [17:53] | Why would they want me? | 他们为什么会要收我啊 |
| [17:54] | Why wouldn’t they want you? | 人家为什么会不要你 |
| [17:56] | Honey, it’s not all about grades. | 宝贝 不只是学术成绩重要啊 |
| [17:58] | I mean, you were involved in — in… | 你还参加了很多… |
| [18:02] | Did you talk to them? | 你们跟学校谈过了吗 |
| [18:03] | I’m sorry, what? | 你说什么 没听清 |
| [18:05] | Show me your tongue. | 舌头伸出来给我看 |
| [18:06] | I don’t know what that would prove. | 我伸舌头又能证明什么呢 |
| [18:09] | This kind of seems like an embarrassing family moment. | 这感觉是个尴尬的家庭时刻 |
| [18:11] | I know, I’m on it. | 已经在录了 |
| [18:12] | Blue! | 蓝色 |
| [18:12] | You can’t go to that campus | 去过那学校的人 |
| [18:13] | without getting a Bulldog Blast. | 肯定都尝过他们的斗牛犬冰沙 |
| [18:15] | We went up there to tell them they made a mistake. | 我们是去告诉他们 不录取你是错误 |
| [18:17] | They didn’t make a mistake, | 他们并没有犯错误 |
| [18:18] | and neither did the other schools. | 其他不要我的学校也没有做错 |
| [18:19] | I’m not going. | 我不会去上的 |
| [18:20] | Honey, it’s your last chance. | 宝贝 这是你最后的机会了 |
| [18:22] | Then I’ll wait until next year. | 那我就明年再去上 |
| [18:24] | – If I go, I want to deserve it. – I can respect that. | -要去 就得是正大光明进去 -这话我服 |
| [18:26] | Nobody asked for your opinion, thank you. | 没人让你提供意见 谢谢 |
| [18:29] | You’re going. | 你必须得去上 |
| [18:29] | You have no idea what your father went through | 你完全不知道你爸爸费了多大功夫 |
| [18:31] | to get you this opportunity. | 才为你弄到这机会 |
| [18:32] | He debased himself in ways you can’t imagine. | 以你无法想象到的方式牺牲自己人格 |
| [18:35] | You said it wasn’t that bad. | 你不是说没多严重吗 |
| [18:37] | What are you watching? | 你在看什么 |
| [18:38] | Our neighbor sent me a video. | 我们的邻居发给我个视频 |
| [18:40] | It’s of Haley and Mitchell. | 是海莉跟米奇尔 |
| [18:41] | Oh. No, that’s — okay, we don’t need to… | 不是 那是… 不需要放出… |
| [18:44] | It’s taking forever. | 太久了吧 |
| [18:44] | I’m pushing as hard as I can. | 我已经用全身力气推了 |
| [18:47] | You have one of those things on your windshield? | 你的挡风玻璃被人安上那东西了吗 |
| [18:49] | How many parking tickets do you have? | 你收到了多少张停车罚单啊 |
| [18:51] | I think we’re focused on the wrong thing here. | 我觉得现在焦点不应该在我啊 |
| [18:53] | Luke’s not going to college. | 卢克不去上大学了呢 |
| [18:55] | Why is your finger pink? | 你的手指为什么是粉色的 |
| [18:57] | This isn’t mine. | 这不是我画的 |
| [18:58] | I knew the perspective was off. | 我就觉得作图视角怪怪的 |
| [18:59] | It’s Cam’s fault. | 是小卡的错 |
| [19:00] | He made me copy it from a photo. | 他让我看着照片做出来的 |
| [19:02] | You know what? I accidentally destroyed the original, | 是这样的 我不小心毁了原件 |
| [19:05] | and I couldn’t live without it. | 我心里又过意不去 |
| [19:06] | Mitchell Pritchett, Parenting Magazine. | 米奇尔·普里契特 我代表”育儿杂志”提问 |
| [19:08] | How is forging a child’s painting any less egregious | 伪造孩子的画就有比用派太太亡夫骨灰 |
| [19:11] | than replacing a pig’s ashes with Mrs. Pasternak’s dead husband? | 来替换猪的骨灰强到哪里去吗 |
| [19:14] | It’s not. | 没有 |
| [19:15] | I’m a hypocrite. My whole life is a lie. | 我就是个伪君子 我的一生充满谎言 |
| [19:17] | Carlos isn’t really in the Miami Sound Machine. | 卡洛斯并不是迈阿密之音的团员 |
| [19:19] | He’s just a — a basic dog groomer. | 他只是个… 普通的狗狗美容师 |
| [19:21] | Save your money. I couldn’t get you your tickets. | 把钱省下来吧 我不能帮你弄到票 |
| [19:23] | You’re spending money on tickets | 你花钱去买票 |
| [19:24] | when you should be spending money on ticket — | 而不是花钱去付掉罚票[单]吗… |
| [19:26] | you know what I mean. | 你懂我的意思 |
| [19:27] | The concert tickets were for Mitchell. | 演唱会的票是帮米奇尔弄的 |
| [19:29] | – So you didn’t get my tickets? – No. | -所以你没帮我搞来门票吗 -没有 |
| [19:30] | – So you didn’t get my tickets. – The website was insane. | -你没帮我买到票啊 -那网站像神经病 |
| [19:33] | You’d need the reflexes of a mongoose. | 没有猫鼬般的反应速度根本抢不到 |
| [19:35] | You lied to me. | 你骗了我 |
| [19:36] | Well, look around! Everybody’s lying. | 看看大家 谁都在说谎 |
| [19:38] | Forging paintings, driving blind, | 伪造画作 盲眼开车 |
| [19:40] | swapping ashes. | 偷换骨灰 |
| [19:41] | I didn’t want to ruin the Pig Moon. | 我不想毁了你的猪月嘛 |
| [19:43] | There is no Pig Moon. | 没有什么猪月好吗 |
| [19:45] | How backwards do you think Grasshopper, Missouri is? | 你是觉得我密苏里老家有多落后啊 |
| [19:51] | Guys, guys. I’ve got this. | 大家听我说 我能解决 |
| [19:53] | Guys. | 各位 |
| [19:54] | I talked to Judge Tager. | 我打给塔格法官了 |
| [19:55] | He’ll make your parking tickets disappear | 他同意撤销你的罚单 |
| [19:57] | in return for a couple of Cubans. | 代价是给他来俩上好古巴雪茄 |
| [19:59] | You took three. | 你拿了三根 |
| [20:01] | The other one is for the security guard at the club. | 另一根是给俱乐部的保安 |
| [20:03] | He moonlights where Estefan’s playing tonight. | 他今晚在埃斯特凡的演唱会兼职保安 |
| [20:05] | He’ll meet you by the stage door. | 你们到时候入口见 |
| [20:07] | Thank you for fixing Jay’s lies. | 谢谢你帮杰圆了谎 |
| [20:10] | We all struggle with the truth. | 我们都对说出实话感到棘手 |
| [20:12] | like last Thursday when I stalled Jay at the club | 就像上周四我帮你把杰拖在俱乐部 |
| [20:14] | so you could get Joe out of the doggy door. | 好让你有时间把乔弄出狗门 |
| [20:16] | She locked us out, and the stove was on. | 她不小心把我俩锁门外了 而瓦斯炉又没关 |
| [20:19] | – And you two. – You know a guy at a club that can help us? | -至于你们两个 -你有认识人能帮忙吗 |
| [20:22] | No. Just talk more. | 没有 你们多谈谈就行了 |
| [20:24] | 90% of your problems would be solved | 你们9成的问题 |
| [20:25] | if you just discussed things. | 都只需要多谈谈就能解决 |
| [20:27] | The Vanderkoff is a knock-off. | 家里的范德考夫沙发是山寨货 |
| [20:29] | I burnt a hole in the knock-off, | 我不小心把山寨货烫出了个洞 |
| [20:30] | and I had replaced it with a real one. | 所以买了个新的真品替换 |
| [20:31] | Okay, everything’s settled here. | 好了 所有问题都解决了 |
| [20:33] | I think the steaks are ready. Let’s go eat. | 我觉得牛排好了 我们去吃饭吧 |
| [20:37] | Well, I guess our son | 看来我们的儿子 |
| [20:38] | isn’t going to college this year. | 今年是不会去上大学了 |
| [20:40] | I know, and I know we’re supposed to be worried about him. | 是啊 而我们本来应该很担心他 |
| [20:42] | But do you see what he just did, | 但你看到他刚才做的了吗 |
| [20:45] | how he solved everybody’s problems like that? | 他怎么帮大家解决问题 |
| [20:48] | It’s pretty incredible, right? | 还挺厉害的吧 |
| [20:50] | That’s a Dunphy man, Claire — | 他是个邓菲家的好男儿啊 克莱尔 |
| [20:51] | resourceful, cool, | 足智多谋 临危不乱 |
| [20:52] | and just the right amount of savoir faire. | 以及恰到好处的随机应变力 |
| [20:56] | I’ll, uh — I’ll see you in the kitchen. | 我… 我们厨房见 |
| [21:03] | So this is a real Vanderkoff. | 所以这是真的范德考夫沙发啊 |
| [21:05] | Yeah, yeah. Feels good to finally be free of that secret. | 对啊 从这秘密中解放出来太爽了 |
| [21:08] | Yeah, it’s just… great to have everything out in the open. | 对啊 把事情都摊开来说感觉太好了 |
| [21:11] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [21:13] | That expensive painting you bought me over there, | 那边你买来送我的名贵油画 |
| [21:14] | I moved it to cover up a hope I made in the wall. | 我移动他是为了挡墙上我弄出来的洞 |
| [21:16] | I only paid 25 cents for that painting at a garage sale. | 我是在人家二手拍卖的时候花2毛5买的 |
| [21:18] | I used the rest of the money on shoes | 剩下的钱我拿去买鞋了 |
| [21:20] | I get electrolysis. My beard grows up to here. | 我有做电流除毛 不然我胡子会长到这 |
| [21:22] | I don’t really know how to line dance, | 我其实不会跳排舞 |
| [21:23] | and that’s why those cowboys laught at you | 所以你做我教你的东西时 |
| [21:24] | when you did what I taught you. | 那些牛仔都在笑你 |
| [21:27] | – That’s not Larry – That’s not Larry. | -那不是拉里 -那不是拉里 |