| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:12] | It had been a week since Devi’s violent encounter with the coyote, | 德维被郊狼袭击一周后 |
| [00:15] | but Paxton’s words from the hospital were still echoing in her mind. | 帕克斯顿在医院说的话还在她脑海里回荡 |
| [00:19] | That’s why it’s cool we’re friends. | 所以没关系 我们是朋友 |
| [00:21] | Of course he had friendzoned her. | 他当然只会和她做朋友 |
| [00:23] | She thought a wild animal was her dad. | 谁会认为野生动物会是自己爸爸 |
| [00:25] | As much as Devi wanted to be a chill girl that you could have sex with, | 尽管德维想方设法成为性感的酷女孩 |
| [00:28] | she knew the truth: she was a weird loser, | 她知道真相 她是个不合群的失败者 |
| [00:31] | and a member of the UN, | 还是”UN”的一员 |
| [00:32] | and today was certainly not gonna change that. | 今天也不会发生改变 |
| [01:14] | Are you Princess Jasmine? | 你是茉莉公主吗 |
| [01:16] | No, but thank you. She is very beautiful. | 不是 不过谢谢 她很漂亮 |
| [01:19] | Ariel’s prettier. | 爱丽儿更漂亮 |
| [01:20] | Where’s Aladdin? | 阿拉丁在哪 |
| [01:21] | I don’t have an Aladdin, | 我没有阿拉丁 |
| [01:23] | because he just wants to be friends. | 因为他只想和我做朋友 |
| [01:25] | Okay… | 好吧… |
| [01:26] | Hi. Can I have two black coffees and one large hot chocolate? | 你好 给我来两杯黑咖和一大杯热可可 |
| [01:29] | But can you write latte on the cup? | 但可不可以在杯子写拿铁 |
| [01:31] | I want people to take me seriously. | 我想让别人更尊重我 |
| [01:33] | Oh, can my daughter take a photo with you? You look so amazing. | 我女儿能和你合个影吗 你看着太美了 |
| [01:37] | No, thanks. | 不了 谢谢 |
| [01:38] | She’d really love to put it on her Instagram. | 她很想发到她的照片墙 |
| [01:40] | It’s so cultural. | 太有民族特色了 |
| [01:42] | I don’t really feel at home right now in my choice of clothing. | 我很不喜欢我现在穿的衣服 |
| [01:44] | I mean, usually I don’t, but especially today. | 通常都不喜欢 今天更不喜欢 |
| [01:47] | She’s just a little girl. | 她只是个小女孩 |
| [01:49] | Okay, sir, you don’t have to say it like that. | 先生 你不用这么说 |
| [01:51] | I just don’t want to take a photo. | 我只是不想照相 |
| [01:53] | Also, why do we have to commemorate everything on social media? | 还有 为什么不管纪念什么都要发社交媒体上 |
| [01:55] | Why can’t we just live in the moment? | 为什么不活在当下 |
| [01:57] | You were on Twitter the entire time you were in line. | 你排队的时间里都在刷推特 |
| [01:59] | You tweeted a “thank you” to a Target ad telling you to have a happy Labor Day. | 你还给祝劳动节快乐的广告回复了”谢谢” |
| [02:03] | – Fine. Let’s just take the photo. – Go. | -好吧 那就照吧 -去吧 |
| [02:07] | Okay. | 好啦 |
| [02:10] | You want any doughnuts with that? | 要不要再来点甜甜圈 |
| [02:11] | Yeah, Ira, I do, but I’m fasting today. | 我倒想 艾拉 但我今天斋戒 |
| [02:16] | Is it Ramadan? | 到斋月了 |
| [02:17] | No, it’s not, Ira. | 不是的 艾拉 |
| [02:19] | Today is Ganesh Puja. | 今天是甘尼许节 |
| [02:28] | Looks like an ad for India, right? | 看着像印度广告吧 |
| [02:30] | Or at least the middle of an Indiana Jones movie, but it’s not. | 或者是”夺宝奇兵”里的情节 不过不是 |
| [02:33] | This is Ganesh Puja, baby. | 这是甘尼许节 宝贝 |
| [02:35] | Ganesh Puja is a Hindu holiday celebrating Lord Ganesh, | 甘尼许节是印度人庆祝甘尼许神的节日 |
| [02:39] | and a time to share warm moments with family. | 也是和家人分享温馨时光的一天 |
| [02:41] | Speaking of warm moments with family, | 说到和家人的温馨时光 |
| [02:43] | let’s check in with the Vishwakumars. | 我们来看看维什瓦库马尔一家 |
| [02:45] | Mom, this sari is so uncomfortable. | 妈妈 这纱丽太不舒服了 |
| [02:47] | Why does it itch so much? | 怎么穿着这么痒 |
| [02:49] | Itchiness of saris is a rite of passage for Indian women. | 感到纱丽带来的痒是印度女性的必经之路 |
| [02:52] | Deal with it. | 忍忍吧 |
| [02:53] | Why can’t I just wear kurta and jeans like I normally do? | 我为什么不能像平常一样穿衬衫和牛仔裤 |
| [02:55] | Then I don’t have to get half naked every time I need to go to the bathroom. | 那样每次上厕所就不用脱光一半了 |
| [02:59] | Devi, you’re of age now. | 德维 你成年了 |
| [03:01] | Half sari is more appropriate. | 半纱丽更合适 |
| [03:02] | Ew, Mom. Don’t say “of age.” | 妈妈 别说”成年” |
| [03:04] | It makes me sound like a girl in a douche commercial. | 弄得我像妇科洗液广告里的女孩 |
| [03:07] | – What is douche? – OK, everyone stop talking about douche. | -什么是洗液 -好了 都别提洗液这个词了 |
| [03:09] | Lord Ganesh doesn’t need to see my daughter | 甘尼许神不能看到我女儿 |
| [03:11] | in ripped jeans and a “Fries Before Guys” t-shirt. | 穿着破牛仔裤和写着”见色不忘友”的短袖 |
| [03:13] | Nalini was a little on edge. | 娜里妮有些心烦 |
| [03:15] | This was the first puja they had gone to | 这是莫汉去世 |
| [03:17] | since Mohan’s untimely death and Devi’s paralysis. | 德维瘫痪后他们去的第一个庆典 |
| [03:20] | Last week, Mrs. Iyengar asked if we were going to show up at puja, | 上周艾杨格问我们庆典还去不去 |
| [03:23] | or whether we, quote, “had too much going on.” | 是不是我们”最近太不如意了” |
| [03:27] | I could just hear the pity in her voice. | 我都能听出来她可怜我们的语气 |
| [03:29] | Too much going on, for Ganesh Puja? That bitch. | 太多事情就不去参加甘尼许节了 那个贱人 |
| [03:32] | Auntie, you must calm down. | 娜里妮姑姑 冷静点 |
| [03:34] | Why does the Hindu Association have to have puja at my high school? | 印度教协会为什么要在我的学校办庆典 |
| [03:37] | It’s so low-rent. | 太低级了 |
| [03:38] | Ben Gross’s bar mitzvah was at the Dolby Theatre. | 本·格拉杰斯的成年礼都是在杜比剧院办的 |
| [03:40] | They have the Oscars there. | 那可是颁奥斯卡的地方 |
| [03:42] | Jewish people know how to save. | 犹太人会省钱 |
| [03:44] | Us, Indians, we get a little bit of money, | 我们印度人稍微有点钱 |
| [03:45] | we go straight to Home Depot to buy a cement fountain. | 就直接跑到家得宝去买水泥喷泉了 |
| [03:48] | We’re just obsessed with fountains. | 我们就是痴迷喷泉 |
| [03:50] | Oh, I love a fountain. | 我爱死喷泉了 |
| [03:51] | Anyway, Devi, | 话说回来 德维 |
| [03:53] | you know Sanchiti Bhattacharyya will be at puja, right? | 你知道萨吉蒂·巴特查里亚会去庆典吧 |
| [03:56] | You remember her useless white husband Ron? | 你记得她那个没用的白人丈夫罗恩吗 |
| [03:58] | Turns out, he’s not that useless after all. | 事实上他并不是那么没用 |
| [04:01] | He runs the most exclusive college counseling company in LA. | 他在洛杉矶开了个独家大学顾问中心 |
| [04:05] | Ninety percent of their kids get into Ivy Leagues. | 那九成的学生都进了常春藤名校 |
| [04:08] | And they are so elite, | 而且他们精英到 |
| [04:09] | they don’t even count Cornell and Penn as Ivies. | 不把康奈尔和宾夕法尼亚大学当成常青藤学校 |
| [04:12] | He’s so successful, he has his own Tesla. | 他特别成功 还有自己的特斯拉 |
| [04:15] | I Zillow-ed his house. | 我查了他房子的价格 |
| [04:16] | Do you want to know what the Zestimate was? | 你们知道那房子多少钱吗 |
| [04:18] | One point eight million dollars! | 180万美元 |
| [04:21] | – Whoa. He loaded. – Yes, he is. | -哇 他真有钱 -是的 |
| [04:24] | Now, Ron doesn’t take many kids, so… | 罗恩现在不收太多学生 所以… |
| [04:26] | if you want to go to Princeton, you know what you need to do. | 你要是想上普林斯顿的话 知道该怎么做吧 |
| [04:29] | I’m on it, Mom. | 交给我吧 妈妈 |
| [04:30] | Winning over old-ass teacher types is my super power. | 我最擅长赢取老教师的芳心 |
| [04:34] | Good girl. | 好孩子 |
| [04:45] | Oh, god. Aunties approaching. | 天啊 阿姨们过来了 |
| [04:48] | Don’t look. | 别看 |
| [04:49] | Where? Where should I not look? | 哪里 别看哪里 |
| [04:50] | Damn it, Kamala. | 该死 卡玛拉 |
| [04:52] | Aunties are older Indian women who have no blood relationship to you, | 阿姨就是和你没有血缘关系的人 |
| [04:56] | but are allowed to have opinions about your life and all your shortcomings. | 但却能过问你任何私事 还会批评你 |
| [04:59] | You have to be nice to them because you’re Indian. | 你还得笑脸相迎 因为你是印度人 |
| [05:01] | It’s so good to see you, and Devi, | 很高兴见到你 还有德维 |
| [05:04] | what a relief to see you’re no longer a cripple. | 你能走路了 真是太好了 |
| [05:06] | What a miracle. | 真是个奇迹 |
| [05:07] | I prayed for her every day. | 我每天都为她祈祷 |
| [05:08] | I said, “No matter why you have chosen to curse them, | 我说”无论您为何选择诅咒他们 |
| [05:12] | please cure her as a reward for my virtue.” | 请用我的功德宽恕她” |
| [05:14] | Thank you. I’m sure your prayers did it. | 谢谢 一定是您的祈祷带来了奇迹 |
| [05:16] | Yes. Thank you for thinking of us. How is Arjun? | 对 感激你一直挂念我们 阿尔琼怎么样 |
| [05:19] | You know Arjun. He just installed a home theater. | 阿尔琼刚布置了一套家庭影院 |
| [05:22] | Two rows of seats. Dolby 5.1 surround sound. | 两排座椅 杜比5.1版环绕音箱 |
| [05:25] | Popcorn machine coming soon. | 马上就要装爆米花机了 |
| [05:27] | Sunu, they don’t care about your stupid home theater | 萨努 她们不在乎你那套愚蠢的家庭影院 |
| [05:30] | with all they’ve been through. | 她们都经历了那么多 |
| [05:32] | I know exactly how you feel. | 我完全知道你们的感受 |
| [05:35] | My husband, Pradeep, had testicular cancer. | 我丈夫普瑞迪普得了睾丸癌 |
| [05:37] | I’m so sorry for your loss. | 请节哀顺变 |
| [05:39] | Oh, no. He’s fine. | 哦不 他没事 |
| [05:40] | It was stage one. They caught it early, | 刚到一级病变 他们发现的早 |
| [05:42] | removed his testicle, and now he’s running the 10K. | 摘除掉了他的睾丸 现在他开始跑长跑了 |
| [05:45] | You’re right. Our situations are so similar. | 你说的对 我们的境遇太相似了 |
| [05:48] | Uh, you know my niece, Kamala, right? | 你们认识我侄女卡玛拉吧 |
| [05:51] | Getting her doctorate at Caltech, soon to be engaged… | 在加州理工读博士 马上就订婚了… |
| [05:54] | to an engineer. | 跟一位工程师 |
| [05:55] | The boy’s parents have two Mercedes. | 那男孩的父母有两辆奔驰 |
| [05:57] | – Two Mercedes? – Lucky. | -两辆奔驰 -太幸运了 |
| [05:59] | As the aunties praised her, Kamala had a sinking feeling. | 听着阿姨们的称赞 卡玛拉心情很沉重 |
| [06:02] | She didn’t want to get married, | 她不想结婚 |
| [06:04] | but she put on a happy face | 但还是强颜欢笑 |
| [06:05] | like I did at the trophy ceremony | 我在1984年法网比赛 |
| [06:07] | when I lost the French Open to Ivan Lendl in 1984. | 输给伦德尔后颁奖时也这样 |
| [06:11] | I’m gonna go find Ron. | 我去找罗恩 |
| [06:12] | Okay. I’ll just stay here and kill myself. | 好 我继续在这慢性自杀 |
| [06:33] | Even though Devi was Indian, | 即便德维是印度人 |
| [06:34] | she didn’t think of herself as Indian Indian like these girls, | 她从不觉得自己和这些女孩一样这么印度化 |
| [06:38] | which is a whole other thing. | 完全是另一种风格 |
| [06:39] | So sometimes she felt a little out of place. | 所以有时她会觉得自己格格不入 |
| [06:42] | They seem cool here, | 她们在这看着很酷 |
| [06:43] | but can you imagine how dorky they would look doing this anywhere else? | 但你能想象在其他地方 这看起来多蠢吗 |
| [06:46] | That’s my sister, Preethi. | 那是我姐姐普丽缇 |
| [06:48] | Her Bollywood dance group was in the Macy’s Day Parade | 她的宝莱坞舞蹈团在梅西感恩节大游行时表演过 |
| [06:51] | on a float sponsored by Ziploc. | 还是在密保诺[塑料袋品牌]赞助的花车上 |
| [06:53] | So who looks dorky now? | 现在到底是谁蠢 |
| [06:55] | Damn, Devi. Preethi’s sister really schooled you. Read the room. | 要命 德维 普丽缇妹妹教育了你 说话注意点吧 |
| [07:08] | – Harish. – Devi, hey. | -赫里斯 -德维 |
| [07:12] | I was hoping I’d see someone cool here. | 我就想在这见到酷的人呢 |
| [07:14] | Do you know if anyone like that is coming? | 你知道有这样的人会来吗 |
| [07:16] | Ouch, burn. | 太损了你 |
| [07:18] | So why are you at this lame-fest? | 你来这无聊的地方干什么 |
| [07:19] | Shouldn’t you be at Stanford, like, playing frisbee with a computer? | 你不该在斯坦福用电脑玩飞盘的吗 |
| [07:22] | I actually really wanted to come. | 我其实挺想来的 |
| [07:24] | To Ganesh Puja? | 来过甘尼许节 |
| [07:25] | At a public high school in the Valley? Are you insane? | 在山谷区里的高中 你疯了吗 |
| [07:28] | Tell me the truth. Did they send you home on medical leave? | 实话告诉我 你是不是请了病假回家 |
| [07:31] | Are you suicidal from Accutane? | 你是不是吃了祛痘药想自杀 |
| [07:33] | No. | 不是 |
| [07:34] | Look, I know I used to clown on this every year, | 我知道我每年都会拿这个节日打趣 |
| [07:36] | but the truth is, I kinda miss puja. | 但其实我挺想念过节的 |
| [07:38] | Are you kidding? | 开玩笑吧 |
| [07:39] | When I get into Princeton, I’m never coming back. | 我要是去了普林斯顿 绝不回来 |
| [07:42] | I’m gonna be an atheist, who eats cheeseburgers every day | 我会做个无神主义者 每天和白人男友 |
| [07:44] | with my white boyfriend. | 一起吃起司汉堡 |
| [07:46] | I thought I’d be that way too, | 我也曾这么想 |
| [07:47] | but it was different when I went to college. | 但上了大学就不一样了 |
| [07:49] | My roommate, Nick, is Native American, | 我室友尼克是印第安人 |
| [07:51] | and he’s so into being Native American. | 他太喜欢自己的文化了 |
| [07:53] | At first, I was like, “You’re away from your parents. | 一开始我还想”你离父母这么远了 |
| [07:55] | You don’t have to pretend to care about your ancestry or whatever.” | 没必要再假装在乎什么传统了” |
| [07:59] | But then he took me to their campus powwow. | 可之后他带我去了他们的校园里的帕瓦仪式 |
| [08:01] | No one was standing in the corner making fun of it. | 没人会在一旁嘲笑自己的节日 |
| [08:03] | They were dancing and chanting, | 他们就是唱歌跳舞 |
| [08:06] | and having a great time, and it made me think, | 非常开心 让我不禁思考 |
| [08:08] | “Why do I think it’s so weird and embarrassing to be Indian?” | “为什么我会觉得作为印度人这么奇怪尴尬呢 “ |
| [08:11] | Where do I start? | 我该从哪说起呢 |
| [08:13] | How about every single thing my mom has ever said and done? | 因为我妈说的每句话和做的每件事 |
| [08:16] | I just thought, “Am I gonna be this insecure Indian guy, | 我就想”我要这样继续做一个不喜欢 |
| [08:18] | who hates doing Indian things?” | 自己文化的印度人吗 “ |
| [08:20] | ‘Cause that’s its own identity. It’s just a shitty one. | 因为这是我们的身份 很糟糕 |
| [08:22] | Well, that’s definitely not my identity. | 好吧 我肯定不是这样的 |
| [08:25] | I love being Indian. | 我喜欢做印度人 |
| [08:27] | Real convincing, Devi. | 真是令人信服啊 德维 |
| [08:29] | I look more comfortable being Indian. | 我做印度人都比你看着自然 |
| [08:38] | You need to spread Mohan’s ashes. | 你该撒莫汉的骨灰了 |
| [08:40] | I spread my mother’s in the fountain at the Bellagio. | 我把我妈的骨灰撒到百乐宫的喷泉里了 |
| [08:42] | She was a gambling addict. | 她曾经有赌瘾 |
| [08:44] | That’s very touching, um… | 这很感人… |
| [08:46] | I just haven’t had the time. | 我只是没时间 |
| [08:47] | You know he cannot get into heaven until you accept his death? | 你要是不接受他的死亡 他去不了天堂的 |
| [08:51] | I meant to ask you. Later today, | 我是想问你 今天晚点儿时候 |
| [08:53] | you think you can look at a few skin tags? They’re under my left breast. | 能不能帮我看看我左胸下边的皮赘 |
| [08:57] | I’m really looking forward to it. Yeah. | 我很乐意帮忙 好的 |
| [09:03] | I’ll find you later. | 我一会儿找你 |
| [09:14] | This is Pandit Rajakrishnan, | 这是祭司 拉杰克斯南 |
| [09:16] | but everyone calls him Pandit Raj. | 但大家都叫他拉杰祭司 |
| [09:18] | He’s the community spiritual leader and also really knows how to work a room. | 他是协会的精神领袖 也很会活跃气氛 |
| [09:22] | Now, everybody repeat after me. | 现在大家跟我念 |
| [09:32] | Just kidding. We’ll do something easier. | 开个玩笑 我们来点简单的 |
| [09:35] | I like Pandit Raj. He’s got a good energy. | 我很喜欢拉杰祭司 他很有意思 |
| [09:37] | Come forward. | 上前来 |
| [09:39] | Have you spoken to Ron yet? | 你和罗恩说上话了吗 |
| [09:40] | I’ve spent all morning kissing up to Sanchiti. | 我一上午都在讨好萨吉蒂 |
| [09:42] | I even told her I would Botox her armpits for free. | 我甚至还答应给她的腋窝免费祛皱 |
| [09:44] | Not yet. I can’t find him. | 还没 我没找到他 |
| [09:46] | You can’t find the one middle-aged white man | 你在500个印度人里 |
| [09:48] | in a group of 500 Indian people? | 找不到一个中年白人吗 |
| [09:50] | Come forward. We are ready for the next group. | 上前来 我们准备好迎接下一组了 |
| [09:52] | – Give it to Pandit Raj. – Nalini. | -把这个给拉杰祭司 -娜里妮 |
| [09:54] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [09:56] | Pray you get into Princeton. | 祈祷考上普林斯顿 |
| [09:57] | Don’t waste your prayers on stupid things like world peace. | 别浪费了你的愿望 求什么世界和平 |
| [10:01] | Praying had always been hard for Devi. | 祈祷对德维来说一直很艰难 |
| [10:03] | It was so easy to get distracted. | 很容易分心 |
| [10:05] | First, she would start praying for the health of her mom and cousin, | 起初她祈祷保佑母亲和表姐身体健康 |
| [10:08] | but then would veer off, thinking about homework, | 然后就走神了 开始想作业 |
| [10:10] | or how in this kneeling position, she could smell her deodorant. | 或者想这个跪着的姿势 可以闻到除臭剂的味道 |
| [10:14] | So she really had to focus on what she wanted: | 所以她必须要专心想着愿望 |
| [10:16] | an acceptance letter from the college of her dreams… | 梦想大学的录取通知书… |
| [10:22] | Princeton! | 普林斯顿 |
| [10:25] | a sudden maturing in certain areas of her body… | 身体某个部位突然成熟… |
| [10:32] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [10:33] | unexpected overtures from certain people at school… | 来自学校里某个人突然的示好 |
| [10:35] | I think I love you. | 我想我爱上你了 |
| [10:38] | …and hearing her mother say the thing she most longed for. | 听到妈妈说她最想听到的话 |
| [10:42] | I’m so proud of you. | 真为你感到骄傲 |
| [10:45] | And you can get your septum pierced. | 你可以给鼻子打洞了 |
| [10:47] | But this year was different. | 可今年不同 |
| [10:48] | She didn’t want her usual things. | 她不想要这些了 |
| [10:50] | Don’t miss. | 别丢球 |
| [10:54] | In your face. | 厉害吧 |
| [10:57] | She wanted something else. | 她想要些别的 |
| [11:04] | Have tika. | 点上吉祥痣 |
| [11:06] | Meanwhile, Kamala knew what exactly she was praying for. | 此时卡玛拉也知道自己想要什么 |
| [11:09] | For her fiance, Prashant, to fall in love with someone in his doctorate program | 希望她的未婚夫普拉桑特在芝加哥大学读博时 |
| [11:13] | at the University of Chicago, | 爱上别人 |
| [11:15] | and for their engagement to be over. | 那样就可以取消婚约 |
| [11:19] | You do not wish to be married? | 你不想结婚 |
| [11:21] | Damn, Pandit Raj. That’s spooky as hell. You’re good. | 天啊 拉杰祭司 这也太吓人了 你太厉害了 |
| [11:28] | Your hair is so black. | 你头发真黑啊 |
| [11:31] | When my sister’s husband died, she stopped coloring her hair. | 我姐姐丈夫去世后 她就不再染发了 |
| [11:34] | Well, I didn’t want to let myself go completely. | 我不想形象不保持形象了 |
| [11:37] | Mohan wouldn’t have wanted that. | 莫汉也不会希望我那样的 |
| [11:39] | You just don’t want to give people the wrong idea. | 还是不要引人误解比较好 |
| [11:41] | What idea? That I love my husband less because my roots aren’t showing? | 误解什么 因为没有白头发我就不够爱我丈夫 |
| [11:45] | Let’s go inside. | 我们进去吧 |
| [11:46] | I heard Roopa got fat. | 我听说鲁帕胖了 |
| [11:56] | Bingo! White guy. College counselor Ron. | 找到了 白人 大学咨询顾问罗恩 |
| [11:59] | Go get him, Devi. | 去搞定他 德维 |
| [12:02] | Hey, are you Ron Hansen-Bhattacharyya? | 你好 你是罗恩·汉森-巴特查里亚吗 |
| [12:06] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [12:07] | It’s so nice to meet you. My name is Devi Vishwakumar. | 很高兴认识你 我叫德维·维什瓦库马尔 |
| [12:09] | I’m a student at this high school, actually. | 我其实是这个高中的学生 |
| [12:11] | Oh, cool. | 哦 好的 |
| [12:13] | Sherman Oaks High is a good Ivy feeder school. | 舍曼奧克斯高中是常春藤很好的生源校 |
| [12:15] | Although the college counselor Susan is a joke. | 就是大学顾问苏珊太差劲了 |
| [12:18] | Yeah. She’s also the lunch lady. | 对 她还是食堂阿姨 |
| [12:20] | So, she’s got a lot on her plate. | 她手头事情很多 |
| [12:22] | I just wanted to say how interested I would be in procuring your services. | 我想说我希望能获得你的服务 |
| [12:26] | Your stats are amazing. | 你的数据太惊人了 |
| [12:27] | Well, I don’t know. I mean, I… | 过奖了 我是说… |
| [12:30] | only got 28 kids into Ivies last year, but I wanted 30. | 我去年只送了28个学生到常春藤 我希望是30个的 |
| [12:34] | The other two went to MIT, | 另外两个去麻省理工了 |
| [12:36] | but you can’t win ’em all. | 人生总不能事事如意 |
| [12:38] | Well, I guess I can’t relate because I do win ’em all. | 我不能产生共鸣 因为我任何方面都很优秀 |
| [12:41] | I’m in all AP classes and got a perfect score on my PSAT. | 我修了所有先修课程 在学术评估测试预考中取得了高分 |
| [12:44] | Great segue, Devi. Effortless. | 接的好 德维 毫不费力 |
| [12:47] | All while volunteering at the kidney dialysis center. | 我还在肾透析中心做义工 |
| [12:49] | When I’m not doing that, | 不做义工的时候 |
| [12:50] | I read Vietnam vets their Bill O’Reilly books. | 我会为越南老兵读比尔·奥雷利的书 |
| [12:53] | Okay, look… I can say this because I married an Indian woman | 听着… 我娶了印度人所以我可以这么说 |
| [12:57] | and am a proud member of this vibrant community. | 作为这个充满活力团体的一员我很骄傲 |
| [12:59] | But schools don’t want another Indian try-hard, | 但大学不会想录取一个 |
| [13:02] | who is president of the padded resume club. | 简历过于精彩的印度优等生 |
| [13:05] | What? | 什么 |
| [13:06] | Renal failure is what keeps me up at night. | 我热衷于肾衰竭这门学问的 |
| [13:08] | Colleges want kids with unusual stories. | 大学想录取经历不寻常的学生 |
| [13:10] | I had this kid. | 我有个学生 |
| [13:11] | He got into a car crash. He was dead a full 30 seconds. | 他出了场车祸 死了30秒 |
| [13:14] | He said god told him to go to Yale. It worked. | 他说上帝让他去耶鲁大学 成功了 |
| [13:18] | Uh, I outgrew a nut allergy, so that’s something. | 我克服了坚果过敏 这不算寻常吧 |
| [13:23] | – I actually know who you are. – You do? | -我其实知道你是谁 -是吗 |
| [13:25] | You’re the girl whose dad died in front of her at a concert | 你是那个在音乐会上亲眼目睹父亲去世后 |
| [13:28] | and became paralyzed. | 瘫痪了的女孩儿 |
| [13:29] | Devi couldn’t believe that the major trauma of her life | 德维不相信自己这么大的人生悲剧 |
| [13:32] | could be reduced to a single sentence, but there it was. | 一句话就说完了 但事实就是这样 |
| [13:35] | Yeah. What about it? | 对 怎么了 |
| [13:38] | That story is freaking amazing. | 这个故事太精彩了 |
| [13:41] | You have the golden ticket. If you’re willing to talk about it, | 这是你的通行证啊 如果你愿意说的话 |
| [13:44] | I bet I can get you into any school you want. | 我赌你可以进任何大学 |
| [13:46] | But Devi didn’t want to use the story of her father’s death | 但德维不想用父亲去世的故事 |
| [13:49] | as a way to make herself more interesting to a bunch of admission committees. | 博得大学面试官的兴趣 |
| [13:53] | No, I’m not gonna do that. | 我不会这么做的 |
| [13:55] | Well, without it, I don’t get your angle. | 好吧 除了这个我没看到你有什么闪光点 |
| [13:58] | To be honest, I don’t see how you would be different | 实话讲 我看不到你和其他那些 |
| [14:00] | than any other Indian kid applying to college. | 申请大学的印度学生有什么区别 |
| [14:02] | I’m not like any other Indian kid, | 我跟其他印度学生不一样 |
| [14:04] | and I’m not interesting just because my dad died. | 我也不是因为父亲去世了才有闪光点 |
| [14:07] | Then what makes you interesting? | 那你有什么特别之处 |
| [14:08] | Oh, I don’t know, Ron. | 我不知道 罗恩 |
| [14:10] | Maybe it’s my perfect grades or my killer test scores. | 或许是我优秀的成绩和考试分数 |
| [14:12] | Or maybe it’s my bitchin’ personality | 或是我特别的个性 |
| [14:15] | or my insane PowerPoint skills. | 演示文稿做得好 |
| [14:16] | I don’t need some washed-up white dude, who leases a Tesla | 我不需要一个租特斯拉开的白种老男人 |
| [14:20] | telling me what makes me special. | 来告诉我我的特别之处 |
| [14:22] | Leasing is still a financial commitment! | 租赁也是一种财力证明 |
| [14:25] | And my monthly payment is quite high! | 而且我的月薪非常高 |
| [14:28] | Oh, look, an open table. | 看 有空座 |
| [14:30] | No, no. Come, come. | 不行 过来 |
| [14:34] | Hey, kids, move. | 孩子们 走开 |
| [14:36] | Just take your slime and go. | 那边玩去 |
| [14:37] | Come on. People are still eating. | 给吃饭的人腾地方 |
| [14:42] | Why could we not sit there? | 我们为什么不坐那 |
| [14:44] | That’s Jaya Kuyavar. | 那是加雅·库亚瓦尔 |
| [14:45] | She came from Chennai, went to UCLA for her doctorate, | 钦奈人 在加州大学洛杉矶分校读博 |
| [14:48] | parents found her a nice boy back home to marry. | 父母给她在家找了个好男人 |
| [14:51] | Then she ran off with an American man. | 她却和一个美国人私奔了 |
| [14:52] | A Muslim. | 是个穆斯林 |
| [14:54] | Parents never spoke to her again. | 父母再也没跟她说话 |
| [14:56] | Did they come for the wedding? | 他们来参加婚礼了吗 |
| [14:57] | Are you out of your mind? You heard me say he was a Muslim. | 你疯了吗 没听见我说他是穆斯林吗 |
| [15:00] | I feel bad for her. | 我为她感到惋惜 |
| [15:01] | We should sit with her. | 我们该和她坐一起 |
| [15:03] | Can’t risk it right now. | 不能冒这个风险 |
| [15:05] | We’re already borderline outcasts. | 我们已经徘徊在边缘地带了 |
| [15:07] | Devi, what did you do? | 德维 你干了什么 |
| [15:09] | I heard from half a dozen aunties that you yelled at college counselor Ron, | 我听七八个阿姨说你跟大学顾问罗恩吵起来了 |
| [15:12] | and made fum of his electric car! | 还嘲笑他的电动汽车 |
| [15:13] | He deserved it. | 他活该 |
| [15:14] | He said I’m just like any other Indian kid applying to college. | 他说我和其他申请大学的印度学生没区别 |
| [15:17] | It was so offensive! | 太没礼貌了 |
| [15:19] | So disappointed in you. | 我对你太失望了 |
| [15:24] | – I’m gonna eat somewhere else. – Please go. | -我去别的地方吃 -快走 |
| [15:34] | Is this yours? | 这是你的吗 |
| [15:35] | – Oh, thank you so much! – Yeah. | -非常感谢 -没关系 |
| [15:37] | You left it on the table. | 你忘在桌子上了 |
| [15:39] | The table you were sitting at after you and your aunt | 在你和你姑姑躲开我后 |
| [15:41] | made a beeline to get away from me. | 坐下来的那张桌子上 |
| [15:42] | No, we weren’t trying to avoid you. | 不是 我们没想躲着你 |
| [15:44] | You seemed so popular, we didn’t want to take up seats for your friends. | 你看起来很受欢迎 我们不想占了你朋友们的座 |
| [15:51] | Sure. | 好吧 |
| [15:53] | Hey, um… I need a break from these aunties. | 嘿… 我想避开这些阿姨一会儿 |
| [15:57] | You want to go check out the vending machines? My treat? | 去看看贩卖机那儿有什么 我请客 |
| [16:00] | Okay. | 好呀 |
| [16:04] | Yeah, so basically, I’m the Hester Prynne of the Indian community | 对 我算是圣费尔南多谷 |
| [16:07] | in the San Fernando Valley. | 印度社区中的海丝特·白兰 |
| [16:09] | I wish I had a less ninth-grade-book analogy for it, | 我希望能不用9年级的阅读书目来比喻我的处境 |
| [16:11] | but it’s accurate. | 但这个更准确 |
| [16:13] | So you’re ultimately very happy with your decision | 那你最后为自己的决定开心吗 |
| [16:15] | even though you got divorced? | 即便你离婚了 |
| [16:17] | Of course not. | 当然不开心 |
| [16:18] | No. | 不 |
| [16:19] | I mean look at me. | 看看我 |
| [16:20] | My closest Indian friend is a woman I met seven minutes ago. | 我最亲密的印度朋友是我刚认识七分钟的人 |
| [16:23] | No. I wish I had just listened to my family | 我当时真应该听家人的话 |
| [16:27] | and married the guy that they chose. | 嫁给他们为我选的男人 |
| [16:29] | Then maybe I wouldn’t be divorced. | 那样我没准就不会离婚 |
| [16:30] | You know, my kids ask about their grandparents, | 我的孩子们问到外婆外公的时候 |
| [16:33] | and… I don’t know what to tell them. | 而… 我都不知道怎么回答他们 |
| [16:35] | Maybe they’ll get over it. | 他们或许会不再计较的 |
| [16:37] | Do you have a sibling, who could have a drug problem | 你有吸毒的兄妹吗 |
| [16:39] | or go to community college? That would help. | 或是上社区大学的 那会好一些 |
| [16:41] | No, I got two brothers, both neurosurgeons, | 没有 我的两个兄弟都是神经外科医生 |
| [16:44] | had a double-arranged wedding with millionaire Hindu sisters. | 跟一对身家百万的印度教姐妹同一天结的婚 |
| [16:49] | As my cousin would say, “That sucks a fat one.” | 要是我表妹 她会说”垃圾透了” |
| [16:51] | Yeah, I agree. | 是的 我同意 |
| [16:54] | Anyway, I think I’m going to head out. | 好了 我该走了 |
| [16:58] | You know, these things aren’t really that fun | 当别人都对你议论纷纷的时候 |
| [17:00] | when everyone is whispering about you. | 有些事就没那么好玩了 |
| [17:02] | But hey, good luck on your engagement… | 不过 祝你订婚成功 |
| [17:05] | and don’t screw it up, yeah? | 别搞砸了 记住了 |
| [17:21] | Devi? | 德维 |
| [17:22] | Paxton! What are you doing here? | 帕克斯顿 你在这儿干什么 |
| [17:25] | Swim practice. What are you doing here? | 游泳训练 你呢 |
| [17:28] | Just… Ganesh Puja. | 就是… 甘尼许节 |
| [17:30] | It’s a weird Indian thing. | 奇怪的印度风俗 |
| [17:33] | What do you do for it? | 你们怎么庆祝呢 |
| [17:34] | We eat and pray to Ganesh. | 吃东西然后向甘尼许祈祷 |
| [17:38] | He’s the elephant god. | 他是象头神 |
| [17:40] | He’s sort of a big deal to Indians. | 是印度人挺崇拜的神 |
| [17:42] | I mean Hindus. | 我是说印度教徒 |
| [17:44] | ‘Cause, you know, there are Muslim Indians, Sikh Indians, Jains, and– | 因为还有穆斯林教徒 锡克教徒 耆那教徒… |
| [17:47] | -Honestly… – You don’t have to give me | -其实… -好了 你不用 |
| [17:49] | the Wikipedia page on India. | 给我普及印度百科知识 |
| [17:51] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [17:52] | So is part of Ganesh Puja kicking lockers in anger? | 所以是甘尼许节搞得你生气踢柜子 |
| [17:55] | No, that was unrelated. That didn’t have… | 不 跟那个没关系 那没… |
| [18:00] | You were joking. | 你是在开玩笑啊 |
| [18:02] | No, I just got mad, which is something I’m working on. | 我只是生气了 我在努力改啦 |
| [18:07] | You do have kind of a temper, huh? | 你确实脾气不小 |
| [18:08] | It’s not my fault. | 不是我的错 |
| [18:09] | Some old loser was telling me that I’m too Indian, | 一个老混蛋刚说我太印度了 |
| [18:12] | and some other people think I’m not Indian enough. | 其他人却认为我不够像印度人 |
| [18:14] | And honestly, all I want to do is eat a doughnut, | 说实话 我就想吃个甜甜圈 |
| [18:17] | but I’m stuck here. | 可我现在却困在这里 |
| [18:18] | Eh. Who cares what other people think? | 管别人怎么想呢 |
| [18:21] | You do you, Vishwakumar. | 你就是你 维什瓦库马尔 |
| [18:25] | Also, you look cool in that outfit. | 对了 你穿这衣服很漂亮 |
| [18:28] | Did he just say she looked good? | 他刚刚在说她漂亮吗 |
| [18:29] | Holy shit. Maybe she wasn’t as friendzoned as she thought. | 天啊 或许她并不是只能做朋友 |
| [18:38] | Okay. I’ve had my fill of socializing. | 好了 我受够了这些社交活动了 |
| [18:40] | – Are you ready to head home? – Yeah. | -你准备好回家了吗 -对 |
| [18:42] | – You see Devi anywhere? – I do not. | -你看到德维了吗 -没有 |
| [18:44] | Perhaps she’s gotten her arms stuck | 她可能偷薯片时候 |
| [18:46] | in the vending machine trying to steal chips. | 胳膊卡在自动售货机里了 |
| [18:48] | It’s happened before. | 以前就这样过 |
| [18:49] | I’ll go check. | 我去看看 |
| [18:50] | – Nalini. – Yes? | -娜里妮 -嗯 |
| [18:52] | Are you leaving? | 你要走了 |
| [18:53] | Ah, yes. I think it’s that time. | 对 时间差不多了 |
| [18:55] | It was so great to see you out of the house | 真高兴看到你走出家门 |
| [18:57] | – and Devi back on her feet. – Thank you. | -德维也恢复了 -谢谢 |
| [18:59] | Let me know if she stops walking again, | 她要是又不能走了就找我 |
| [19:01] | because I have a cousin in medical sales | 我有个表弟是卖医药产品的 |
| [19:03] | who can get you a very nice wheelchair for cheap. | 一定给你找一台便宜又好的轮椅 |
| [19:05] | Hello, ladies. | 女士们 你们好 |
| [19:06] | -Namaste, Pandit Raj. -Hello, Pandit-ji | -您好 拉杰祭司 -您好 祭司 |
| [19:08] | Would one of you be able to give me a ride? | 你们谁能载我一程吗 |
| [19:11] | The day had been a long one for Nalini, | 今天对娜里妮来说实在太漫长了 |
| [19:13] | and she needed a win, even if it was a small one. | 她需要出口气 即便是件小事 |
| [19:16] | I can. | 我可以 |
| [19:17] | Oh, wonderful. Could you take me to The Home Depot? | 太好了 你能带我去家得宝公司吗 |
| [19:21] | It would be my pleasure. | 我的荣幸 |
| [19:23] | Great. There’s a beautiful fountain I’ve had my eye on. | 太好了 我看上了一个漂亮的喷泉 |
| [19:27] | This is very kind of you. | 你太好了 |
| [19:28] | I could’ve taken an Uber. | 我可以叫个快车的 |
| [19:30] | Our Pandit in an Uber? | 让我们的祭司去打车 |
| [19:32] | What’s next? Prime Minister Modi on Postmates? | 接下来呢 莫迪总理去搭外卖的车吗 |
| [19:34] | Over my dead body. | 我死也不会同意的 |
| [19:36] | I really enjoyed puja today. | 今天的庆典很有趣 |
| [19:38] | I like the incense you used. | 我喜欢你用的香薰 |
| [19:39] | It was like we were in a cannabis store. | 闻起来像我们在大麻商店一样 |
| [19:41] | Thank you. You can buy it on my website… | 谢谢 你可以在我网站上买… |
| [19:43] | coolhindude.com | 酷印度兄弟.com |
| [19:46] | Anyhow, I hope you all found some clarity in your prayers today. | 我希望你们都从今天的祈祷中明确了思想 |
| [19:51] | For sure. One hundred percent. | 当然 完全明确了 |
| [19:52] | Very much so, Pandit-ji. | 非常明确 祭司先生 |
| [20:04] | Wonderful. | 太好了 |
| [20:07] | Thanks for the ride. | 谢谢你载我过来 |
| [20:08] | I found the car very comfortable. | 这车坐着很舒服 |
| [20:10] | Our pleasure, Pandit-ji. | 我们的荣幸 祭司先生 |
| [20:12] | Though there is pain, | 即便有痛苦 |
| [20:14] | the pain will subside because you are a good family. | 也会因你们一家人的善良而消退 |
| [20:17] | And god will always see that. | 神明永远都看的到 |
| [20:25] | Where do you want to go to college? | 你想上哪所大学 |
| [20:27] | – Princeton. – I will bring it up to god personally. | -普林斯顿 -我会亲自和神明说的 |
| [20:31] | Thanks for the ride. Go, Lakers! | 谢谢你们送我 湖人队加油 |