| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:12] | This is Paxton Hall-Yoshida. | 他是派克斯顿霍尔吉田 |
| [00:14] | He’s a 16-year-old boy from Sherman Oaks, California, | 今年16岁 住在加州雪曼橡树区 |
| [00:17] | and I am model, designer, activist, | 我是模特儿 设计师 社运人士 |
| [00:20] | and a former 16-year-old from California, Gigi Hadid. | 以及曾经16岁的加州女生吉吉哈蒂徳 |
| [00:28] | You may be asking yourself, | 你可能会想 |
| [00:30] | “Why is Old Gigers taking time out of her busy skedge | 老吉吉平日那么忙 干嘛花时间 |
| [00:32] | to narrate the story of a 16-year-old boy?” | 口述一个16岁男生的故事？ |
| [00:35] | Believe it or not, I relate to this kid. | 信不信由你 因为我感同身受 |
| [00:37] | We’re both constantly underestimated | 我们都经常被人瞧不起 |
| [00:39] | because people only see us as sex symbols. | 因为大家只把我们当成性感象征 |
| [00:42] | -派克斯顿你还好吧？-我好担心你 | |
| [00:44] | -你被车撞时 我 回消息给我 -有需要的话找我 | |
| [00:46] | When scientists declare your face to be perfectly symmetrical, | 如果科学家说你有完美对称的一张脸 |
| [00:49] | that’s all everyone thinks you have to offer the world, | 大家会觉得你也只有这点贡献 |
| [00:52] | but we’ve got brains, too, and feelings, and… | 可是我们也有脑袋啊 还有感情和 |
| [00:56] | Paxton, dude, put a shirt on! I’m trying to make a point here. | 派克斯顿 拜托你穿件衣服 这样叫我怎么讲道理？ |
| [01:00] | Anyway, we have so much more going on inside. | 反正我们也是很有内在美的 |
| [01:03] | At least that’s true for me. We’ll see what happens with Paxton. | 至少我是这样啦 至于派克斯顿 我们就看下去吧 |
| [01:08] | 好想做一次 | |
| [01:17] | Dude, my arm. What the hell? | 兄弟 我的手 你干嘛？ |
| [01:19] | I just wanted to make sure you’re not faking it. | 我只是想知道你是不是装的 |
| [01:21] | Wow, you’re, like, really hurt, bruh. | 哇 你好像真的很痛 兄弟 |
| [01:23] | Uh, yeah, he was like, “really hurt, bruh,” | 对 他确实是”真的很痛 兄弟” |
| [01:26] | but it wasn’t just his arm, | 但他不只手痛 |
| [01:28] | and it was all this chick’s fault. | 而且都是这女人的错 |
| [01:31] | Ever since Devi came into Paxton’s life, | 自从迪薇和派克斯顿在一起后 |
| [01:34] | it’s been nothing but chaos and confusion. | 她就只会带来混乱局面而已 |
| [01:39] | Paxton, I am so sorry. | 派克斯顿 我真的很对不起 |
| [01:42] | It’s just so weird seeing you all busted up. | 看到你伤成这样的感觉好怪 |
| [01:44] | I’m still prettier than you are. | 我还是比你帅 |
| [01:46] | Hey, I have a vibrant countenance | 我的外表充满生气 |
| [01:48] | that people find relatable and appealing. | 很多人都觉得讨喜有魅力 |
| [01:50] | Paxton wasn’t really the jealous type, | 派克斯顿不是很会吃醋 |
| [01:52] | but the fact that Devi, the weirdest girl he’d ever liked, | 但他喜欢的女生中 最怪的就是迪薇 |
| [01:55] | was two-timing him with Ben Gross | 结果她还跟班葛罗斯劈腿 |
| [01:57] | really screwed with his head. | 真的让他心浮气躁 |
| [01:59] | I mean Ben Gross, really? | 我是说 班葛罗斯？有没有搞错？ |
| [02:09] | What did Ben Gross have that Paxton didn’t? | 小班到底比派克斯顿好在哪里？ |
| [02:12] | Besides a screening room and a… | 除了他有电影放映室和 |
| [02:14] | Whoa, is that a Patek Philippe watch? Damn, I don’t even have one of those. | 喂 那是百达翡丽名表吗？可恶 我连一支都没有 |
| [02:18] | I have some unpleasant news. | 我有个不好的消息 |
| [02:21] | According to the powers that be, | 因为有力人士的缘故 |
| [02:23] | I am no longer allowed to test you guys | 使得我不能再用测验 |
| [02:26] | on your feelings about history. | 评估各位对历史的感受 |
| [02:29] | Apparently, they think it’s more valuable | 他们显然觉得更重要的课题 |
| [02:32] | for you to know about things like dates, | 在于让学生了解年代 |
| [02:35] | and facts, and the names of dead white men. | 事件 还有已故白人的名字 |
| [02:38] | So, is the test gonna multiple choice, or… | 所以是考选择题还是 |
| [02:41] | Multiple choice. Yeah, you’d love that, wouldn’t you? | 哼 选择题 你最喜欢选择了吧？ |
| [02:44] | Can we choose two answers for a question, | 我们可以选两个答案吗？ |
| [02:47] | or do we have to commit to just one? | 还是只能坚持一个？ |
| [02:49] | Interesting, Ben. I am definitely open to there being multiple answers. | 有意思 小班 我绝对支持多选题 |
| [02:53] | No, there should only be one choice, | 不行 应该只有一个答案 |
| [02:57] | and Devi should have known what it was. | 迪薇应该知道答案是哪个 |
| [03:01] | 你们必须争取 没有白人特权的权利 | |
| [03:04] | Can’t believe you got played by dorks. | 你竟然被书呆子耍了 |
| [03:07] | Are you not as hot as you used to be? Am I the hottest one in the group now? | 难道你没以前帅了？我现在变成这群人里最帅的吗？ |
| [03:10] | Yeah, Coyote Girl cheated on you with that Young Sheldon-looking dude, | 对 土狼妹竟然偷吃那个 像《小谢尔顿》的小子 |
| [03:15] | and now you smell like wet cast. You’ve lost your edge, man. | 现在你全身石膏味 优势全没了 |
| [03:18] | Shut up, dickhead. I haven’t lost anything. | 闭嘴 白烂 我还是很红的 |
| [03:21] | Anyone want to sign my cast? | 谁想在我的石膏上签名？ |
| [03:22] | I do. | 我要 |
| [03:24] | Paxton had no shortage of female admirers. | 派克斯顿不缺女粉丝 |
| [03:26] | Legend has it, he romanced Kaia Gerber at summer camp | 据说他在夏令营 跟辛蒂克劳馥的女儿交往 |
| [03:29] | when he was just a boy of ten. | 那时他才十岁 |
| [03:31] | See? The only mistake I made | 看吧 我只犯了一个错 |
| [03:33] | was letting crazy Devi drag me into her psychodrama. | 就是被疯女迪薇牵扯到她的小宇宙 |
| [03:37] | “Crazy Devi”? Oh my God, that is so good. She is crazy. | ”疯女迪薇”？天啊 这句话真妙 她真的是疯子 |
| [03:41] | Remember when she fell in that guy’s pool? | 还记得她掉进神秘人的游泳池吗？ |
| [03:43] | That guy? You mean Ben, your ex-boyfriend? | 神秘人？你是说你的前男友小班？ |
| [03:46] | Oh, right! I forgot about him! | 哦 对耶 我都忘了他了 |
| [03:49] | “Crazy Devi.” That’s hilare. | ”疯女迪薇” 太好笑了 |
| [03:51] | Remember when she had that weird party? | 还记得她办那个怪轰趴吗？ |
| [03:53] | And that guy fell off the roof? | 还有人从屋顶摔下来？ |
| [03:56] | That was me. | 那是我啦 |
| [03:58] | As a champion swimmer, Paxton had never worried about college. | 派克斯顿是游泳金牌 从没担心过大学的事 |
| [04:01] | He’d already been courted by some pretty dope schools | 已经有好几间名校抢着要他 |
| [04:04] | like Stanford and UCLA. | 像斯坦福和加州大学洛城分校 |
| [04:05] | So he thought it was weird | 所以他不知道 |
| [04:06] | when the college counselor suddenly asked to see him. | 升学辅导老师为何突然找他 |
| [04:09] | Good afternoon, Paxton. Thank you for meeting with me. | 派克斯顿 你好 谢谢你跑一趟 |
| [04:12] | No problem. I didn’t even know this room was here. | 不客气 我根本不知道有这间办公室 |
| [04:15] | Let me cut to the chase. I spoke to your coach this morning, | 我直说吧 我今天早上找过你的教练 |
| [04:18] | and due to the severity of your injury, | 因为你的伤势严重 |
| [04:20] | you might have to face the possibility that you might not swim for Stanford. | 所以可能没办法帮斯坦福大学游泳了 |
| [04:25] | Well, I’d still be cool with going to Stanford, | 就算没办法在斯坦福大学游泳 |
| [04:27] | even if I can’t swim there. | 我还是愿意去念 |
| [04:29] | Oh, sweetie… | 帅哥啊 |
| [04:30] | I think we need to cast a wider net. | 我们可以多考虑其他学校 |
| [04:33] | You see, what you have are college athlete grades, | 你的优势在于大学运动员分数 |
| [04:37] | and when you subtract the athlete part, your options tend to narrow. | 但是把运动员的部分扣掉后 你的选择就会变少 |
| [04:42] | Wait, so where can I get in? | 等一下 那我可以念哪里？ |
| [04:45] | I’m fine with anything as long as it’s, you know, close to a beach, | 什么学校都可以 只要靠近海滩 |
| [04:48] | has a good basketball team, the classes aren’t too hard, | 有好的篮球队 课业又不太难 |
| [04:51] | but like some smart people still go there. | 但还是要有好学生愿意念 |
| [04:55] | Ah-ha. Well, let’s see. | 好 我看看 |
| [04:57] | First off, are your parents extremely wealthy? | 首先 你的父母超级有钱吗？ |
| [05:00] | No. | 没有 |
| [05:01] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [05:02] | In that case, perhaps a two-year or community college might be a safer bet. | 那么申请二专或社区大学比较安全 |
| [05:08] | Look, we can shoot higher, | 我们可以提高标准 |
| [05:10] | but you’ll need to significantly improve your GPA. | 但是你的学业成绩必须大幅进步 |
| [05:14] | Would you be open to being tutored? | 你愿意请家教吗？ |
| [05:18] | -I guess. -Great! | -可以啊 -很好 |
| [05:20] | Because I took the liberty of setting you up | 我已经擅自帮你安排了 |
| [05:22] | with the best peer tutor in the entire school. | 全校最好的学生家教 |
| [05:26] | This girl is an academic beast. | 这个女生的成绩超好 |
| [05:31] | Sorry, she didn’t tell me it was you. | 对不起 她没说是你 |
| [05:35] | Oh, you two know each other? | 你们认识？ |
| [05:37] | Oh, no. Let me guess. | 糟糕 我猜猜看 |
| [05:40] | She was some sort of bet with your cool friends. | 她是你跟朋友打赌的对象吧？ |
| [05:43] | What? No. | 什么？不是 |
| [05:45] | I’d rather not go to college than work with her. | 我宁愿没念大学也不跟她学 |
| [05:53] | Hey, what are you doing home so early? | 嘿 你怎么这么早回家？ |
| [05:56] | Oh, right. No swimming for you, Nemo. | 对喔 你不能游泳了 尼莫 |
| [06:00] | Yeah, no swimming for me. | 对 我不能游泳了 |
| [06:04] | Wait, do you usually come hang out at my house when I’m not home? | 等一下 我不在家时 你会常跑过来吗？ |
| [06:08] | Yep. I find it’s a peaceful place to sit with my thoughts, or to watch porn. | 对 我觉得这里很适合静下来思考 也可以看A片 |
| [06:14] | Didn’t need to know that. | 我不想知道 |
| [06:16] | What’s wrong, buddy? You seem down. | 怎么了？你心情很差 |
| [06:18] | Ms. Warner said that without swimming, college isn’t looking too great for me. | 华纳老师说如果不游泳 我上大学的概率就不高 |
| [06:22] | Eh, who needs college? | 上大学干嘛？ |
| [06:24] | After high school, I’m going straight to YouTube. | 我高中毕业后要直接当网红 |
| [06:26] | Get this. I’m gonna react to reaction videos. | 听好 我要拍自己对反应影片的反应 |
| [06:30] | Yikes. | 逊毙了 |
| [06:32] | -Cool. -I know, right? | -不错喔 -我知道 对吧？ |
| [06:35] | Paxton, you good? | 派克斯顿 你还好吧？ |
| [06:37] | Yeah. Yeah, I’m… I’m great, man. | 还好 我很好 |
| [06:40] | I just kinda don’t know what I’m doing with myself. | 我只是不知道自己该怎么办 |
| [06:44] | I’ll tell you what your doing. You’re hanging out with me. | 我告诉你 你跟着我 |
| [06:46] | Now that you’re free, we can party every day. | 既然你有空 那我们就每天玩 |
| [06:53] | You wanna blow some shit up? | 想炸点东西吗？ |
| [06:55] | Oh shit. | 靠 好啊 |
| [06:59] | Oh, yeah! | 好耶 |
| [07:06] | Watch the screen and you’ll know, Shira. | 席拉 你看屏幕就会懂 |
| [07:09] | Oh yeah! I told you. I told you. | 好耶 我就说吧 |
| [07:13] | I’m pushing A and the left joystick. | 我按A和左摇杆 |
| [07:15] | You’re not supposed to click A, and you’re not doing it. | 你不能按A啦 你这样不对 |
| [07:18] | You’re not moving the left joystick. | 你没有动左摇杆 |
| [07:21] | Wow, dude, that reaction was kind of weird. | 哇 大哥 那个反应好怪 |
| [07:23] | 你不会相信我对这些反应的反应 | |
| [07:25] | Yo, that reaction was good. | 哇 那个反应很赞 |
| [07:27] | That was sick! | 太猛了 |
| [07:29] | Dude, that’s a surprising reaction. | 大哥 这个反应很惊人 |
| [07:34] | He left. | 他走了 |
| [07:36] | Nice. Really descriptive, bro. | 很棒 描述得很清楚 兄弟 |
| [07:41] | Your reaction to my reaction to their reaction just made my life, bruh. | 你对我对他们的反应的反应 让我太快乐了 兄弟 |
| [07:48] | This week has been the best. | 我这个礼拜超开心的 |
| [07:50] | And you know what next week is gonna be like? Exactly the same. | 你知道下个礼拜要干嘛吗？一模一样 |
| [07:54] | For the rest of our lives, baby! | 我们要过一辈子这种生活 |
| [07:58] | For the rest of our lives. | 一辈子 |
| [08:05] | I need you | 我需要你 |
| [08:07] | to help me get into college. | 帮我上大学 |
| [08:12] | All right. This doesn’t have to be weird. We can be study buddies. | 好 气氛不必太僵 我们可以当学伴 |
| [08:15] | Could I offer you a soda, or a water, or a hot tea? | 你要喝汽水 开水还是热茶吗？ |
| [08:20] | Cool. Cool, cool, cool. | 好 |
| [08:22] | I actually work a little better, too, when I’m dehydrated. | 我口干时的念书效果也比较好 |
| [08:26] | Oh. Wow. This book has not been opened before. | 哇 这本书还没打开过 |
| [08:31] | So where should we start? Math? | 所以要从哪一科开始？数学？ |
| [08:34] | You mean where should you start? | 你是说你要从哪科开始？ |
| [08:36] | Look, when I said I needed your help, I meant I need you to do my work for me. | 我说我需要你帮忙时 我是要你帮我做功课 |
| [08:41] | So, when you’re done with my English essay, you can start… | 等你帮我写完英文作文后 可以 |
| [08:44] | What? I can’t do that. That would be cheating. | 什么？不行 这样算骗人 |
| [08:47] | Cool. Then you should be really good at it, huh? | 好啊 那你应该很在行吧？ |
| [08:50] | -Paxton, let me explain. -Explain what? | -派克斯顿 你听我解释 -解释什么？ |
| [08:53] | How you thought you could get away with dating both of us? | 解释你怎么觉得劈腿不会被发现？ |
| [08:57] | You must think I’m such an idiot. | 你一定觉得我是大白痴 |
| [08:59] | I don’t think you’re an idiot. | 我没有觉得你是白痴 |
| [09:00] | I liked you. You know, I thought we were… | 我很喜欢你 我以为我们是 |
| [09:04] | What? | 什么？ |
| [09:06] | Doesn’t matter. | 不重要了 |
| [09:08] | Paxton. I’m really, really sorry. | 派克斯顿 我真的 真的很抱歉 |
| [09:11] | Look, I could honestly give a shit about you and Ben Gross. All right? | 我真的不在乎你跟小班混 好吗？ |
| [09:14] | But you trashed my chances at a swimming scholarship. | 可是你毁了我拿到游泳奖学金的机会 |
| [09:18] | So now I’m going to college on a you-doing-my-homework scholarship. | 所以我现在要靠你帮我作弊上大学 |
| [09:22] | We good? | 可以吗？ |
| [09:25] | Cool. | 很好 |
| [09:37] | Sorry to interrupt, but I did your math and your English essay, | 抱歉 打搅一下 我写好你的数学和英文作业 |
| [09:40] | and I made this serving dish for your art class. | 还帮你做了美术课的盘子劳作 |
| [09:43] | I think it’s a rustic conversation piece for any elegant tablescape… | 很有乡村风 适合当餐桌上高雅 |
| [09:46] | Cool. You can just leave it right there. | 很好 放在那边就可以了 |
| [09:49] | I mean, what Devi did to Paxton was cruel, but this is straight-up humiliating. | 虽然迪薇对派克斯顿很残忍 但是这样也太侮辱人了 |
| [09:53] | Yo, you’re blocking the screen! | 喂 你挡到电视了 |
| [09:56] | Damn, Crazy Devi, you made me ‘splode myself. | 可恶 疯女迪薇 你害我自爆了 |
| [10:00] | And Paxton wasn’t enjoying punishing her as much as he thought he would. | 而且派克斯顿发现惩罚她 并不会让自己爽 |
| [10:05] | I can’t believe you said that to her face. | 你竟然当着她的面讲那种话 |
| [10:07] | She was literally blocking the screen. | 她真的挡到电视啦 |
| [10:10] | 三角函数成绩：A | |
| [10:12] | Even getting his very first “A” felt like a pretty hollow victory. | 就算拿了今生第一个”A” 也是空虚的胜利感 |
| [10:15] | It’s like when you see an overly photoshopped swimsuit photo of yourself. | 这就像看自己修图过度的泳装照一样 |
| [10:19] | Your butt may look right and tight, but you know you didn’t earn it. | 虽然有个小翘臀 但你知道都是假的 |
| [10:27] | Okay, so I need you to do the unit six questions in my biology textbook, | 好 我要你写生物课本第6课的题目 |
| [10:31] | and here is a Spanish take home quiz on parts of the body. | 这是西班牙文人体单字的测验卷 |
| [10:34] | I already filled in… | 我已经写了 |
| [10:35] | Eggs. | 蛋 |
| [10:37] | Bueno. Muchísimas gracias. Adiós. | 很好 感激不尽 再见 |
| [10:41] | What? | 什么？ |
| [10:42] | I’ll get these to you tomorrow. | 我明天会拿给你 |
| [10:46] | Oh. Hey, Rebecca. Cool fit as always. | 蕾贝卡 你的衣服还是很漂亮 |
| [10:48] | -Thanks, Devi. -See ya. | -谢谢 迪薇 -再见 |
| [10:53] | You’re making Devi do your homework? | 你要迪薇写你的功课？ |
| [10:55] | Keep it down, please? | 小声点好吗？ |
| [10:57] | Look, I can explain. She’s the reason I don’t have… | 你听我解释 是她害我没有 |
| [11:00] | Any dignity? | 没有尊严？ |
| [11:02] | No. Ouch. Jesus, Rebecca. | 没有 好狠 拜托 蕾贝卡 |
| [11:04] | She’s the reason I don’t have a chance at a scholarship anymore. | 是她害我没办法拿奖学金的 |
| [11:07] | It makes sense for her to help me. She owes me. | 她帮我是应该的 谁叫她欠我？ |
| [11:09] | No one owes you. | 没人欠你什么 |
| [11:11] | I had to work so hard to get into my fashion program. | 我拼了老命才能上时装课程 |
| [11:14] | I know. All right, and I’m proud of you. | 我知道 你让我觉得很光荣 |
| [11:16] | Don’t you want to be proud of yourself? | 你不想让自己觉得很光荣吗？ |
| [11:18] | I just want to go to college. Period. | 我只想进大学 就这样 |
| [11:21] | And without Devi, I don’t know if I can make that happen. | 如果没有迪薇 我不知道能不能进去 |
| [11:24] | Then maybe you don’t deserve to go. | 那也许你没那个资格 |
| [11:27] | Damn, Rebecca. Drag his ass. | 妈呀 蕾贝卡 骂得真狠 |
| [11:30] | Not that I’m taking sides. I am his narrator. | 我可没有选边站喔 我是他的旁白 |
| [11:38] | Paxton’s parents, Kevin and June Hall-Yoshida, | 派克斯顿的父母 凯文和琼恩 |
| [11:40] | ran a local sporting goods store, | 在当地开运动用品店 |
| [11:41] | and as you can see here, were a little Jesus-y, | 你们看得出来他们很虔诚 |
| [11:45] | but in a chill way. | 但不是恐怖的那种 |
| [11:46] | Like in a “we’ve got one of those fun fish stickers on our Volkswagen” way. | ”我们会在车上贴基督教贴纸” 那种虔诚的方式 |
| [11:50] | Amen. So, Paxton, Ojichan called. | 阿门 派克斯顿 你爷爷打来了 |
| [11:54] | Uh, he said, “Email is broken.” | 他说 “电子邮件坏了” |
| [11:56] | So could you go by after school and help him out? He loves seeing you. | 所以你放学后可以帮他吗？他看到你最高兴了 |
| [11:59] | Sure. It’s not like I have anything else going on. | 好啊 反正我现在也没事好干 |
| [12:04] | So how’s everything at school? | 学校的事怎么样？ |
| [12:07] | Yeah, your college counselor called, | 对 你的升学辅导老师打来 |
| [12:09] | and she said now that swimming’s on the back burner… | 她说因为游泳没办法了 |
| [12:11] | -I have to raise my grades. -Yeah. | -我得提高学科分数 -对 |
| [12:13] | I know. I got it covered. | 我知道 我搞定了 |
| [12:15] | Someone’s got it covered. | 有人帮忙搞定了 |
| [12:17] | But, honey, to be honest, I told Mrs. Warner | 儿子 说实话 我跟华纳老师说过 |
| [12:20] | that I’m not gonna put that kind of pressure on you. | 不会给你这种压力 |
| [12:22] | Our family values kindness over achievement. | 我们家比较重视人品 不重视成绩 |
| [12:25] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [12:27] | You don’t think I can get into college? | 你们觉得我进不了大学？ |
| [12:29] | No, honey. That’s not what we meant. | 不 儿子 我们不是这个意思 |
| [12:32] | Just school’s never been your thing. | 只是你成绩本来就不好 |
| [12:34] | Yeah, and we want you to know that if you don’t go to college, | 对啊 我们要你知道 就算你没念大学 |
| [12:38] | that is totally okay. | 也完全没有关系 |
| [12:40] | You know, just hang back. Work at the store with me. | 留在老家 到店里帮忙 |
| [12:42] | Yeah, and we always sell so many sports bras during your shifts. | 对啊 每次你值班 运动胸罩就大卖 |
| [12:46] | Whoa, these hippie Christians have some real low expectations for their kid. | 哇 这对嬉皮基督徒 对儿子的期待真低 |
| [12:50] | Like, lower than Paxton’s dad’s ponytail. | 比派克斯顿爸爸的马尾巴还低 |
| [12:53] | Have you guys ever thought that maybe I want to go to college? | 你们没想过我可能想念大学吗？ |
| [12:56] | -You do? -Of course. | -真的？-当然啊 |
| [12:58] | I want an education, a career. | 我也想受教育 闯一番事业 |
| [13:01] | Well, that’s really cool, sweetheart, | 那非常好啊 儿子 |
| [13:04] | but if you wanna go to college, you’re gonna have to work really hard. | 但是如果你要上大学 就得非常用功 |
| [13:08] | I can work hard. Why don’t you think I can work hard? | 我可以用功啊 你怎么觉得我不行？ |
| [13:11] | I’d like to answer that. | 我想回答这一题 |
| [13:13] | No, please don’t. | 不要 拜托别说 |
| [13:17] | It was bad enough his peers and teachers underestimated him, | 同学和老师看不起他已经够惨了 |
| [13:19] | but hearing his parents excuse him from even trying to go to college | 可是听到父母帮他找 不必拼升学的借口 |
| [13:23] | really cut Paxton to the core. | 真的让派克斯顿很痛心 |
| [13:25] | -What do you want your new password to be? | 你要什么新密码？ |
| [13:28] | -Dog. -That’s too short. | -狗 -太短了 |
| [13:30] | -Okay, dogs. -It needs to be at least eight letters. | -好吧 很多狗 -至少要有八个字母啦 |
| [13:33] | Oh, man, that’s too many letters. I’m old. | 天啊 这样太多 我老了耶 |
| [13:37] | Yeah? | 什么事？ |
| [13:39] | Ted, how about some fresh lemonade? | 泰德 想喝点新鲜柠檬汁吗？ |
| [13:44] | Cheryl, this is my grandson, Paxton. | 雪柔 这是我孙子 派克斯顿 |
| [13:47] | Oh. So handsome. Just like his grandfather. | 好帅喔 跟他爷爷一个样 |
| [13:52] | I’ll come back when you’re alone. | 我等你一个人时再过来 |
| [13:56] | Damn, player. | 乖乖 花心大少 |
| [13:57] | Well, look who’s talking. I noticed all those hearts on the cast. | 你还好意思讲这种话？我都看到石膏上的心心了 |
| [14:01] | Yeah, you know. I get it from you. | 你也知道 我跟你学的 |
| [14:03] | Yeah. | 最好是 |
| [14:07] | -Hey, Ojichan? -Yeah? | -爷爷？-怎样？ |
| [14:08] | -Can I ask you something? -Sure. | -可以问一个问题吗？-问吧 |
| [14:11] | Do you think I’m too stupid to go to college? | 你觉得我笨到上不了大学吗？ |
| [14:14] | What? Who told you that? | 什么？谁讲的？ |
| [14:18] | Basically everyone, including my parents. | 基本上每个人都这样说 包括爸妈 |
| [14:21] | Oh, what do they know? | 他们懂什么？ |
| [14:22] | Look, don’t get me wrong. I mean, I love them, | 别搞错意思 我很爱他们 |
| [14:25] | but they spend too much time in the sun. It cooks their brains. | 但是他们晒太多太阳 脑袋烧坏了 |
| [14:28] | You are smart enough to go to college. | 你当然有上大学的脑袋 |
| [14:31] | You were fluent in Japanese by the time you were five. | 你才五岁就能讲流利日语 |
| [14:34] | I think you are a genius. | 我觉得你是个天才 |
| [14:37] | Arigato, Ojichan. | 谢谢 爷爷 |
| [14:39] | Paxton, people are going to think all sorts of things about you. | 派克斯顿 每个人对你会有不同想法 |
| [14:43] | That you’re not smart, that you don’t belong, | 觉得你很笨 不属于某个圈子 |
| [14:46] | that you’re the handsomest man in the whole assisted living center. | 但你是整个安养中心最帅的男人 |
| [14:49] | Yeah? | 什么事？ |
| [14:50] | Oh, Ted. I made you a chicken. | 泰德 我帮你准备了烤鸡 |
| [14:53] | I’m busy, Gladys! | 葛芮蒂 我在忙 |
| [14:56] | But, Paxton, the only opinion of you that truly matters is yourself. | 派克斯顿 真正重要的 是你对自己的想法 |
| [15:00] | So make yourself proud. Okay? | 所以要为自己争取荣耀 好吗？ |
| [15:04] | Now, I want to give this to you. | 现在 我要把这个给你 |
| [15:07] | Here. | 在这儿 |
| [15:09] | You try and give this to me every time. It’s a box of books you don’t want. | 你每次都想送我 这只是一箱你不想看的书 |
| [15:12] | No, they’re family heirlooms. Some of them are very old. | 不对 这些是传家之宝 有的已经非常古老 |
| [15:16] | Really? Because this is the novelization of Avatar. | 真的？里面还有《阿凡达》电影小说 |
| [15:20] | And you will cherish it when I’m dead and gone, | 等我死了以后 你要珍惜这本书 |
| [15:23] | and you will pass on the wisdom of the Na’vi to your grandchildren. | 把纳美人的智能传给你的孙子 |
| [15:28] | -Thank you. -Now, how about some chicken? | -谢谢 -现在想不想吃点烤鸡？ |
| [15:36] | Oh. Hi. I think you should do your woodshop homework on your own. | 嗨 我觉得你应该做自己的木工作业 |
| [15:40] | It’s heavy because it’s filled with birdseed, | 里面是鸟饲料 所以很重 |
| [15:42] | but I forgot to put a hole in it for the birds. | 可是我忘了做鸟的出入口 |
| [15:45] | Yeah, I actually don’t want you to do my homework anymore. | 其实我不要你帮我做功课了 |
| [15:48] | Is it because of how bad the birdhouse is? I get it. | 因为这个鸟窝很烂吗？我懂 |
| [15:52] | No, no, it’s not the birdhouse. | 没有 跟鸟窝无关 |
| [15:54] | Wait a minute. Is there a roof on the bottom of it too? | 等一下 你在下面也做了屋顶？ |
| [15:58] | I panicked. | 我一慌就乱做 |
| [15:59] | Look, I’ve been thinking about it, | 其实我想了很多 |
| [16:01] | and I don’t want to cheat my way into college, | 我不想用作弊的方式上大学 |
| [16:04] | so can you tutor me, like, for real? | 所以你可以当我的真家教吗？ |
| [16:09] | Of course. | 那当然 |
| [16:10] | Awesome. Well, we have that Facing History test on Friday. | 太好了 “面对历史”课星期五要考试 |
| [16:13] | Maybe we can start there? | 可以从那边开始吗？ |
| [16:15] | Yeah, sure. I’d love… | 好啊 我很乐意 |
| [16:20] | Whoa. | 哇 |
| [16:21] | All right, who coined the term Cold War in the British press in October 1945? | 好 谁在1945年10月的英国报上 发明了”冷战”一词？ |
| [16:25] | I don’t know. Russia? | 我不知道 俄国吗？ |
| [16:28] | No. George Orwell. | 不对 是乔治欧威尔 |
| [16:29] | You think the whole country of Russia | 你觉得全俄国人 |
| [16:31] | sat down at a typewriter and wrote an essay? | 都坐在打字机前写文章吗？ |
| [16:33] | I don’t know. This stuff’s hard. | 我不知道 这种东西好难 |
| [16:36] | Can’t you at least try and make it more interesting? | 不能想办法让历史变有趣吗？ |
| [16:38] | Like, rap all the facts like they did in Hamilton? | 像《汉密尔顿》音乐剧 用饶舌曲唱出历史？ |
| [16:41] | I can’t do that. I don’t know… how. | 我不行啦 我不会 唱 |
| [16:49] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [16:51] | Oh no. Make it stop. | 死了 拜托别唱了 |
| [16:53] | Soviets put out Sputnik But they can suck a dick… | 苏联发射史普尼克 但他们该去吸鸡鸡 |
| [16:57] | I can’t. I’m bailing. I’m bailing. | 我不行 我不玩了 |
| [17:00] | Did you just tell a satellite to suck a dick? | 你刚才叫人造卫星吸鸡鸡？ |
| [17:02] | And did you just remember what Sputnik was? | 你记得史普尼克是人造卫星？ |
| [17:05] | Oh, I did. | 真的耶 |
| [17:06] | Someone’s learning. | 有人学到东西啰 |
| [17:09] | What is a boy doing in your room with the door closed? | 你房间里怎么有男生？还把门关起来 |
| [17:12] | Mom, I’m just tutoring him. Relax. | 妈 我只是当他的家教 别紧张 |
| [17:16] | He wants tutoring? | 他要你当家教？ |
| [17:19] | Fine, but you can tutor him from further away, right? Move! | 好 但你当家教 可以离远一点吧？移开 |
| [17:22] | -Okay. -It’s studying, not tango class. | -好啦 -你们在用功 不是教探戈舞 |
| [17:25] | There’s a boy here? | 里面有男生？ |
| [17:27] | Oh, you’re handsome. | 你好帅喔 |
| [17:29] | What’s your ethnicity? Let me have three guesses. | 你是什么种族的？让我猜三次 |
| [17:32] | No, no, no, let’s not do that. Come, come. | 不行 不要这样 走吧 |
| [17:35] | Devi, door stays open. | 迪薇 门要打开 |
| [17:40] | That… That right there is why I’m good at school. | 这就是我成绩好的原因 |
| [17:43] | I live with an army of badgering Indian women. | 我跟一群很烦的印度女人住 |
| [17:47] | My mom will threaten me with bodily harm | 我妈说只要成绩低于”A” |
| [17:49] | if I make anything below an “A.” It’s highly motivating. | 她就会体罚 给我学习动机 |
| [17:52] | Oh my God, I’ve got it. I will be your overbearing Indian mother. | 天啊 我知道了 我当你的印度虎妈 |
| [17:57] | That could work, | 这样也许有用 |
| [17:58] | but isn’t it a little messed up for you to act like my mom? | 可是你当我妈不是有点乱来吗？ |
| [18:02] | Why? | 为什么？ |
| [18:03] | I don’t know, because we used to hook up. | 我不知道 因为我们交往过 |
| [18:07] | Paxton! Boy, stop. | 派克斯顿 拜托 住手 |
| [18:10] | You know what you’re doing with those bedroom eyes. | 你的这双蒙胧电眼会迷死人 |
| [18:14] | Oh, nice. | 好耶 |
| [18:17] | What’s the name of the military alliance | 苏联和几个东欧国家 |
| [18:19] | between the Soviet Union and several Eastern European countries? | 组成的军事同盟叫什么？ |
| [18:22] | The Warsaw Pact, and that’s a fact. See? I can rap too. | 华沙公约组织 铁铮铮的事实 看吧 我也会饶舌乐 |
| [18:26] | Quality rapping. Okay, who was the first American man in space? | 一流的饶舌曲 好 第一个美国太空人是谁？ |
| [18:30] | Wait, we had a trick for this one. | 等一下 这个有口诀 |
| [18:32] | Space, the moon, counting sheep, shepherd. Alan Shepard! | 太空 月球 数羊 羊皮”靴” 是亚伦”薛”帕德 |
| [18:36] | -How long was the Cuban Missile Crisis? -Twelve days. | -古巴导弹危机持续了几天？-12天 |
| [18:40] | What the hell? | 搞什么？ |
| [18:41] | You just brought shame to your whole family. | 你刚刚丢你全家人的脸 |
| [18:43] | Why can’t you be more like your cousin? | 为什么不学你表哥？ |
| [18:45] | My cousin works at a weed dispensary. | 我表哥在大麻店工作 |
| [18:47] | Well, let me just dispense some knowledge into your brain. It was 13 days. | 让我把一点知识 呼到你的大脑里 13天啦 |
| [18:52] | Shit. | 靠 |
| [18:53] | Hey, it’s okay. You got this. | 没关系 你一定没问题 |
| [18:59] | -Yo, Maxi-Pax. -Told you not to call me that, bro. | -喂 “买鸡排” -跟你说过不要这样叫我 |
| [19:01] | No doubt, but look, | 我知道 不过 |
| [19:02] | I snuck the answers to the test while Shapiro was out eating an açaí bowl. | 我趁夏皮罗老师出去吃巴西莓果时 偷了考试答案 |
| [19:06] | Look, I wrote them on my thigh. | 现在全写在大腿上 |
| [19:09] | Here. Do you want to copy them down? | 来 你想抄吗？ |
| [19:10] | Nah, man, I’m good. I studied. | 不用了 我没问题 我有念书 |
| [19:13] | What? You studied? | 什么？你有念书？ |
| [19:17] | Why can’t you be more like your cousin, the weed dealer? | 你为什么不能学你表弟卖大麻？ |
| [19:30] | All right. He wrote his name. We’re on a roll. | 好 他写名字了 这下有望了 |
| [19:34] | Oh no. Short answer? Where’s the multiple choice? | 糟糕 简答题？选择题死去哪里了？ |
| [19:39] | Okay. We can do this, Paxton. You remember what NATO is. | 好 我们一定能过 派克斯顿 你还记得北约是什么 |
| [19:43] | It’s the North Atlantic Treaty Organization. | 就是北大西洋公约组织 |
| [19:45] | The North Atlantic Treaty Organization. | 北大西洋公约组织 |
| [19:48] | Come on, kid, just write “North.” | 拜托 孩子 先写”北”吧 |
| [19:51] | Ugh! Only an asshole would smile during a test. | 只有混蛋才会笑着考试 |
| [19:54] | Just start writing, Pax. Write anything. | 快动笔啦 小派 写什么都好 |
| [20:02] | No, no, no. Don’t panic. Take a deep… | 不行 别慌 深呼 |
| [20:07] | Oh damn. He gone. | 糟糕 他闪人了 |
| [20:18] | Hey, are you okay? What happened? | 你还好吧？怎么回事？ |
| [20:22] | I don’t know. It was the craziest thing. | 我不知道 刚才超级扯的 |
| [20:25] | My… My heart was racing, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. | 我心跳加速 好像无法呼吸 |
| [20:29] | I mean, all over a history test. What’s wrong with me? | 考个历史科也会这样 我怎么了？ |
| [20:34] | I think you had a little panic attack. | 你应该是惊慌过度 |
| [20:37] | I… I used to get nervous before swim meets, | 我以前在游泳比赛前会紧张 |
| [20:40] | but, I mean, once I hit the water, it went away because I knew I was good at it. | 但一下水就不会 因为我知道我很强 |
| [20:44] | Well, you can be good at school too. You just need to practice. | 你也可以功课好 只要练习就行了 |
| [20:48] | Were you good at the butterfly the first time you tried it? | 你第一次游蝶式就很厉害吗？ |
| [20:50] | Yeah. I set a school record. | 对啊 还打破学校纪录 |
| [20:54] | Oh. Wow. That’s famously a very hard stroke. | 哇 蝶式是有名的难耶 |
| [20:57] | -Not for me. -Okay, Michael Phelps. Chill. | -我觉得很简单 -好啦 菲尔普斯 少臭屁 |
| [21:01] | But back to the school thing. | 不过回到学业的事 |
| [21:02] | I think it’s good that you had a panic attack. | 我觉得你惊慌过度有好处 |
| [21:05] | Why? It felt awful. | 为什么？感觉超差的 |
| [21:08] | Well, it means you care. | 因为这代表你在乎功课 |
| [21:12] | You care about school. | 你关心课业 |
| [21:15] | Oh, damn. I guess I do. | 可恶 这样讲也对耶 |
| [21:18] | Weird. | 好怪喔 |
| [21:21] | It’s not like it really helped me much. | 又帮不了什么忙 |
| [21:23] | I definitely failed that test. I mean, I think I even got today’s date wrong. | 这次考试我绝对没过 我大概连今天的日期都写错了 |
| [21:27] | Well, it’s a good thing you have a pushy Indian mother. | 还好你有逼人太甚的印度老妈 |
| [21:30] | Get up. Let’s go. I want to talk to your teacher. | 起来 我们走 我跟你老师讲去 |
| [21:32] | Are you deaf? Get up! Let’s go! | 你聋子啊？起来 我们走 |
| [21:35] | -Okay. Okay. -Let’s go. Now. | -好啦 -走啦 快点 |
| [21:37] | All right. Okay. | 好啦 |
| [21:41] | Mr. Shapiro, Paxton would like to retake his test. | 夏皮罗老师 派克斯顿想要重考 |
| [21:44] | I’m sorry, guys. That wouldn’t be fair to the other students. | 各位 对不起 这对其他学生不公平 |
| [21:50] | Mr. Shapiro, because you bowed to the establishment, | 夏皮罗老师 因为你向体制低头 |
| [21:54] | Paxton was besieged by a crisis of self-worth. | 派克斯顿才会质疑自我价值 |
| [21:56] | If you don’t give him a second chance, you’re teaching him that it is not okay | 如果你不给他第二次机会 就等于告诉他年轻男人 |
| [22:00] | for young men to be vulnerable, | 不能有脆弱的时候 |
| [22:02] | and are therefore furthering the agenda of toxic masculinity. | 进一步深化”男子气概”这种有毒思想 |
| [22:07] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [22:09] | Oh my God. Am I? | 天啊 会这样吗？ |
| [22:12] | Thank you for calling me in, Devi. | 谢谢你指正我的错误 迪薇 |
| [22:15] | Paxton, stop by at lunch. | 派克斯顿 中午时过来一趟 |
| [22:18] | You can take that test again. | 你可以重考 |
| [22:20] | Really? Thanks, Mr. S. I’ll be there. | 真的吗？谢谢夏老师 我一定会去 |
| [22:27] | Oh, what was that? | 刚才是怎样？ |
| [22:29] | First rule of being an honors student, learn to manipulate your teachers. | 想当个优等生 就要先学会控制老师 |
| [22:32] | Mrs. Paloma gives me a Christmas gift every year. | 帕洛马老师每年都送我圣诞礼物 |
| [22:37] | Seeing Devi chumming it up with Paxton was more than Ben could bear. | 小班看到迪薇跟派克斯顿重修旧好 心里很不是滋味 |
| [22:41] | Samberg, get the hell out of here. You had your episode. | 安迪山伯格 给我滚开 这不是你负责的那一集 |
| [22:45] | Oh, whatever, Hadid! Why you gotta be so possessive? I’m out. | 随便啦 哈蒂徳 干嘛占有欲这么强？我走了 |
| [22:51] | -What’s poppin’? -Yo. | -怎么了？-嗨 |
| [22:54] | I brought Tarts for my favorite tutee. | 我买饼干送给得意门生 |
| [22:56] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [23:02] | These hit different when you earn them. | 靠自己的感觉真好 |
| [23:06] | Check it out. | 你看 |
| [23:07] | You got a “B.” | 你拿了”B” |
| [23:09] | I got a “B.” | 我拿了”B” |
| [23:10] | That’s sick. | 太猛了 |
| [23:12] | It’s a start. | 至少是个开始 |
| [23:13] | Thanks for pushing me, by the way. | 对了 谢谢你推我一把 |
| [23:16] | Of course. I mean, I sort of owe you for the fact that you got hit by a car. | 没问题 算是我欠你的 毕竟我害你被车撞 |
| [23:22] | And the other thing. | 还有那件事 |
| [23:25] | Yeah, the other thing. | 对啊 那件事 |
| [23:27] | We really don’t need to talk about that. | 我们真的不必提那档事了 |
| [23:31] | We’re cool. | 没事了 |
| [23:33] | Really? Wow. That’s a relief. | 真的吗？哇 我松了一口气 |
| [23:36] | Yeah. | 对啊 |
| [23:37] | I mean, it’s… it’s crazy when you think about it, right? You and me? | 现在想想 实在也太扯蛋了 对吧？我们两个？ |
| [23:42] | I mean, there’s no way it would’ve worked out. | 我们本来就不可能长久 |
| [23:45] | I mean, we just don’t make any sense, | 我们在一起真的很奇怪 |
| [23:49] | you know? | 对吧？ |
| [23:51] | Right. Right. | 对啊 |
| [23:53] | Tutor and tutee seems like a much more natural relationship between us. | 家教和家教学生的关系 比较适合我们两个 |
| [23:57] | Exactly. | 没错 |
| [24:00] | So, would you maybe want to sign my cast? | 那么 你要在我的石膏上签名吗？ |
| [24:03] | Yeah. | 好啊 |
| [24:06] | It’s pretty crowded. | 都快写满了 |
| [24:08] | I see Zoe Maytag wasn’t overly concerned with leaving room for others. | 佐伊梅泰格都不想留位子给别人的 |
| [24:12] | That’s Zoe. She actually wrote over, like, a couple names I think. | 佐伊就是这样 她好像还盖住几个人的名字 |
| [24:16] | I’m not surprised. | 这样才像她 |
| [24:25] | Check this out. | 你看 |
| [24:27] | A “B.” Did Devi have a bad day? | 只有”B” 迪薇状况不好吗？ |
| [24:32] | No, I had a good day. I actually studied and got this on my own. | 不 是我的状况很好 我真的有用功 靠实力考出来的 |
| [24:36] | You opened a textbook? | 你有看课本？ |
| [24:38] | I did. I even read all the words on the pages. | 我有 而且还看了书上的字 |
| [24:41] | She taught you how to read? | 她教你怎么认字？ |
| [24:43] | Yes, Rebecca! Someone get her on Twitter. | 蕾贝卡赞 谁快帮她申请推特帐号 |
| [24:46] | We need her realness. | 我们需要她的直白 |
| [24:48] | You were right. If I’m going to college, I want to earn it. | 你说得对 如果我要上大学 就必须靠自己争取 |
| [24:52] | I’m proud of you. | 你让我觉得好骄傲 |
| [24:54] | Thanks, Becca. I’m proud of you too. | 谢谢小蕾 你也让我觉得好骄傲 |
| [24:57] | Hey, could you try these on? | 喂 你可以试穿一下吗？ |
| [25:00] | I think you’re the same size as Kendall Jenner. | 我觉得你跟坎达珍娜的尺码一样 |
| [25:03] | I think I’m more of a Kylie, but… | 我觉得比较像凯莉珍娜 但 |
| [25:07] | Well, this has been a real blast, | 虽然我很开心 |
| [25:10] | but I gotta get back to my super fulfilling life as a multi-hyphenate. | 但是我得回到自己身兼多职 超有成就感的生活 |
| [25:15] | I hope we’ve all learned that we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, | 希望大家都学到不要以貌取人 |
| [25:18] | and that the Cold War ended in 1991. | 还有冷战在1991年就结束了 |
| [25:22] | John McEnroe, back to you. | 约翰马克安诺 现场交还给你 |