| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:12] | Tequila, checkbook, sourpuss. | 龙舌兰 支票薄 面色阴沉? |
| [00:17] | Must be alimony time. | 一定又在开赡养费了 |
| [00:20] | Go away, Charlie. | 离我远点 查理 |
| [00:22] | Boy, you’d think for all that money, | 兄弟 这么多钱 |
| [00:24] | she’d at least come and give you a lap dance. | 她至少也得为我表演一次艳舞 |
| [00:27] | Leave me alone, Charlie. | 离我远点 查理 |
| [00:28] | In fact, you know what’d be funny? | 事实上 知道啥才好玩吗? |
| [00:30] | Where it says “memo,” write “lap dance.” | 在备忘录那栏写上 艳舞 |
| [00:33] | Give her something to explain at tax time. | 让她在纳税的时候说不清楚 |
| [00:37] | Charlie, you… | 查理 你真是… |
| [00:40] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [00:42] | – So where’s Jake? – Sleeping at a friend’s. | – 杰克呢 – 在朋友家过夜了 |
| [00:45] | – He’ll get dropped off tomorrow. – Oh, man. | 明天会被送回来 |
| [00:47] | – I rented a movie he’d like. – Oh, what’d you get? | 老弟 我给你租了个你喜欢的电影 |
| [00:49] | Don’t worry. It’s educational. | – 什么电影 – 别担心 是教育影片 |
| [00:52] | One Million Years B. C.? How is this educational? | “公元前一百万年” 这能有什么教育意义 |
| [00:55] | Raquel Welch running from dinosaurs in a fur bikini? | 拉蔻儿·薇芝 穿着皮制的比基尼被恐龙追赶 |
| [01:00] | What is that if not history? | 这还不具有历史意义吗 |
| [01:03] | I’m afraid you’re gonna have to watch it by yourself. | 不好意思 你还是自己看吧 |
| [01:06] | Won’t be the first time. | 反正不是第一次了 |
| [01:09] | What’s the deal with that giraffe? | 那个长颈鹿干嘛的 |
| [01:11] | How come you bring it out every time you write an alimony check? | 你怎么每次 一写支票就把它拿出来? |
| [01:15] | It’s symbolic. | 它有特殊意义 |
| [01:18] | Do you wanna know what it’s symbolic of? | 你难道就不想知道它代表什么吗 |
| [01:20] | No, I’m good. | 不感兴趣 |
| [01:24] | I made it in ceramics class | 我和朱蒂丝还约会的时候 |
| [01:25] | for Judith when we were dating. | 在陶艺课上为她做的 |
| [01:29] | All these years I’ve been shelling out for tennis bracelets and satin underwear. | 我这么多年来 一直在买手链和丝质内裤 |
| [01:33] | Some women aren’t impressed with jewelry and lingerie. | 有些女人并不追求首饰和内衣 |
| [01:37] | Well, sure, if you wanna date a dead girl. | 是啊 如果你想和女尸约会 |
| [01:42] | Hey, I just realized. | 我突然发现 |
| [01:44] | Your name is Al, | 你是”艾” (Al) |
| [01:45] | and you’re sending your ex-wife money… | 你给你前妻寄钱 (money) |
| [01:48] | …so it’s “Al-i-money.” | 合起来就是赡养费 (Alimony) |
| [01:54] | Hey, hey, I just realized, your name is Charlie… | 我也刚发现 你叫查理 |
| [01:58] | …and you’re a moron. | 还是个低能儿 |
| [02:05] | Be that as it may. | 随便你怎么说 |
| [02:07] | If you gave her the giraffe, why do you have it? | 你不是把长颈鹿送给她了 那怎么还在你这? |
| [02:10] | When Judith kicked me out, I wanted to get back at her. | 当朱蒂丝把我赶走后 我想报复她 |
| [02:13] | She took the house, she took the car, she took the money. | 她拿走了房子 车 还有钱 |
| [02:16] | I felt I had to take something. | 我觉得我也得分点什么 |
| [02:18] | So you stole bric-a-brac. | 所以你偷了个摆设? |
| [02:21] | – Symbolic bric-a-brac. – Oh, right. | – 具有特殊意义的摆设 – 好吧 |
| [02:25] | You see, now every month when I write the check… | 你看现在每月我写支票的时候 |
| [02:28] | …I can look at it and remind myself… | 我就可以看着它 提醒自己… |
| [02:32] | …what a pathetic loser I am. | 我怎么过那么惨啊! |
| [02:38] | No, dude. You don’t need a giraffe for that. | 傻兄弟 你不需要这个长颈鹿 |
| [02:42] | Get rid of the damn thing. | 扔了它 |
| [02:44] | You’re killing yourself with this bitterness. | 你这样会被痛苦折磨死的 |
| [02:46] | What, you think I’m hurting myself more than her? | 你认为与她比起来 我更是在伤害自己? |
| [02:50] | No, I don’t think you’re hurting her at all. | 我觉得她完全没受到伤害 |
| [02:53] | You need to move on, buddy. | 忘了她往前看吧 伙计 |
| [02:57] | You’re right. You’re right. | 你说的对 你说的对 |
| [03:00] | And you know what would be truly symbolic of that? | 你知道怎样才能让它更有意义吗 |
| [03:03] | Getting your knob shined by a keno waitress in Laughlin? | 用它吸引 拉芙林的赌场女郎与你做爱? |
| [03:07] | No. No. | 不 不 |
| [03:11] | Me bringing this back to Judith | 我把它还给朱蒂丝 |
| [03:13] | and apologizing for taking it. | 然后为偷走它这事向她道歉 |
| [03:18] | I like my idea better. | 我更喜欢我的主意 |
| [03:21] | Okay, here’s the plan. | 好了 我想好计划了 |
| [03:23] | I’ll bring this little fella back to Judith, and clean the slate. | 我把这个小玩意还给朱蒂丝 和她一刀两断 |
| [03:27] | Did you even consider my idea? | 你考虑过我的建议吗 |
| [03:30] | – You drive. – Why do I have to go? | – 你开车 – 我为什么要去 |
| [03:32] | Because I am obviously too drunk to drive. | 因为我喝醉了开不了车 |
| [03:35] | What does that say about your plan? | 这跟你的计划又有什么关系 |
| [03:47] | Alan, wait. | 艾伦 等等 |
| [03:49] | You can’t stop me. | 不要阻止我 |
| [03:50] | I am giving Judith back the giraffe. | 查理 我一定得把长颈鹿还给她 |
| [03:52] | Oh, I don’t wanna stop you. I just want a good view. | 我没想阻止你啊 我只想占个好位置 |
| [03:56] | Okay, you can stay. | 好吧 你呆在这里 |
| [03:59] | Charlie, look at this. What is this? “The Harpers.” | 查理你看 上面写着”哈勃一家” |
| [04:04] | – Yeah, so? – She’s not the Harpers anymore. | – 怎么了 – 她才不是”哈勃一家” |
| [04:07] | She’s the Harper. | 她只是一个哈勃 |
| [04:10] | That mat is a complete lie. | 这块脚垫是个大骗子 |
| [04:12] | Yeah, and it’s in cahoots with the mailbox. | 对 它还是邮箱的同谋 |
| [04:18] | Come on, ring the bell. | 拜托 按门铃吧 |
| [04:23] | You and me, we’re the Harpers. | 你和我 我们才是哈勃一家 |
| [04:26] | Us. | 我们! |
| [04:30] | Oh, Alan. | 艾伦 |
| [04:34] | Hi. | 梅尔尼克医生 |
| [04:37] | Dr. Melnick. Is Jake all right? | 杰克还好吗 |
| [04:41] | I assume so. He’s spending the night at a friend’s. | 我想是的 他去朋友家过夜了 |
| [04:44] | Oh, that’s right, that’s right. | 对啊 |
| [04:46] | Dr. Melnick is Jake’s pediatrician, | 梅尔尼克是杰克的儿科医师 |
| [04:48] | so naturally, I thought… | 我不由自主的想到… |
| [04:56] | Oh, okay. | 好吧 |
| [05:00] | Looks like somebody else has given your wife the giraffe. | 看起来该有其他人 给你妻子长颈鹿了 |
| [05:05] | Make sure they didn’t forget the garlic balls. | 记得提醒他们大蒜丸子 |
| [05:11] | What are you doing here? | 你在这做什么 |
| [05:13] | Why don’t I just get back in the hot tub and give you guys a minute. | 我回浴盆里去 你们慢慢聊 |
| [05:18] | – Well? – I came to give you this. | 我是来给你这个的 |
| [05:22] | – What is it? – I made it for you. | – 这是什么 – 我为你做的 |
| [05:26] | – Just now? – No, no, a long time ago. | – 刚刚吗 – 不不 很久以前了 |
| [05:32] | It’s symbolic. | 它有特殊意义 |
| [05:37] | Alan, you’re a disturbed man. You need help. | 艾伦 你神经失常了 你需要看医生 |
| [05:41] | Enjoy those garlic balls. | 尽情享用大蒜丸子 |
| [05:45] | Wow, that was more fun than I expected. | 比我想象中的好玩多了 |
| [05:48] | Come on, giraffe boy, I’ll buy you a drink. | 来吧长颈鹿男孩 我请你喝酒 |
| [05:50] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [05:51] | Wait, wait, wait. | 等等 |
| [06:07] | Our pediatrician. | 我们的儿科医师 |
| [06:09] | My ex-wife is sleeping with our pediatrician. | 我前妻 在和我们的儿科医师睡觉 |
| [06:20] | I wonder if she gets a lollipop after every visit. | 不知道她是不是每次都能吃到棒棒糖 |
| [06:30] | You know, you’re actually a very lucky man. | 你知道吗 其实你很幸运 |
| [06:32] | Oh, really? Really? How am I lucky, Charlie? | 真的吗 我怎么幸运了 查理 |
| [06:35] | Show me the luck. | 证明给我看 |
| [06:36] | Well, first of all, if Jake ever gets sick or hurt… | 首先 如果杰克生病或受伤了 |
| [06:39] | …free medical care is only a hot tub away. | 一个浴盆外就有免费医疗 |
| [06:42] | Well, that’s true. He is good with kids. | 这倒是 他很会和孩子相处 |
| [06:45] | I begged her to do it with me in the hot tub. | 可我曾经求她在浴盆里做爱 |
| [06:47] | She said it made her hair frizzy. | 她却说她的头发会变卷 |
| [06:51] | Well, apparently, she’s found the right conditioner. | 显然 她找到了适合自己的护发素 |
| [06:54] | What if she’s serious about this guy? What if she marries him? | 如果她和他是认真的呢 如果她嫁给他呢 |
| [06:58] | – Even better. – Better? | – 那更好了 – 更好? |
| [07:01] | How is it better? Show me the better. | 这怎么是更好 证明给我看 |
| [07:03] | If she marries him, you’re off the hook for alimony. | 如果她嫁人你就摆脱赡养费了 |
| [07:08] | That is better. | 确实更好了 |
| [07:10] | In fact, if you saw the big picture, | 事实上 如果你早看清大局 |
| [07:12] | you’d encourage this relationship. | 你应该鼓励他们 |
| [07:14] | This guy is a real catch for you. Don’t let him get away. | 这个男人是你的机会 要抓住啊 |
| [07:17] | You’re right. Maybe I should go back there… | 你说的对 或许… |
| [07:20] | …and, you know, bless their union. | 或许我该回去 祝福他们永结良缘 |
| [07:24] | No, no, no. | 不不 |
| [07:25] | You provided the woman and the hot tub. | 你已经提供了女人和热浴盆 |
| [07:27] | – That’s enough for one night. – Yeah, I guess. | – 这晚上已经足够了 – 我想是吧 |
| [07:36] | – Probably even paid for the garlic balls. – Yeah. | 没准还付了大蒜丸子的钱 |
| [08:07] | Could I get some more coffee, Berta? | 我能再来点咖啡吗 波塔 |
| [08:09] | Who’s stopping you? | 没人拦着你啊 |
| [08:23] | Get your own damn coffee. | 要喝咖啡自己冲去 |
| [08:28] | – Well, Charlie, you’re finally up. – Hey, Mom. | – 查理 你终于起床了 – 妈妈 |
| [08:33] | – Where’s my grandson? – He’s at a sleepover. | – 我孙子呢 – 他借宿在别人家了 |
| [08:35] | – He’ll be here later. – And no one calls me? | – 他过一会就回来 – 竟然没人通知我? |
| [08:37] | I wouldn’t come over if I’d been told he wasn’t here. | 我要是知道他不在这就不会来了 |
| [08:40] | Good to know. | 好消息 |
| [08:42] | Where’s your brother? His car’s not in the driveway. | 那你弟弟呢 他的车不在车道上 |
| [08:45] | Hey, Mom, I’m not even sure where my pants are. | 妈 我都不知道我的短裤在哪 |
| [08:50] | All right. Well, looks like you and I get to spend a little quality time together. | 好吧 看起来咱俩可以好好聊聊了 |
| [08:55] | Gee, I’d love to, but I got my regular Sunday morning softball game. | 我很想 但我要看周日早晨的垒球比赛 |
| [09:00] | – Charlie. – Yeah. | 查理 |
| [09:01] | It’s Saturday. | 今天是周六 |
| [09:06] | Damn. | 妈的 |
| [09:23] | – Oh, you’re still here. – Yeah. | – 你还在这 – 是的 |
| [09:27] | Listen, Alan, I’m really sorry about… | 艾伦听我说 我真的很对不起 |
| [09:29] | No, no, no. I should apologize to you. | 不 我应该向你道歉 |
| [09:31] | Showing up last night unannounced. That’s completely inappropriate. | 昨晚突然打扰你们 这实在太没礼貌了 |
| [09:34] | And I came by to tell you it won’t happen again. | 我保证再也不会发生了 |
| [09:40] | So you came over unannounced | 所以你现在突然出现 |
| [09:42] | to apologize for coming over unannounced? | 是为昨晚的突然出现而道歉? |
| [09:45] | I was afraid you’d pick up on that. | 不好意思 你说对了 |
| [09:48] | Is Judith up yet? | 朱蒂丝起床了吗 |
| [09:49] | Actually, she’s not here. | 事实上 她不在家 |
| [09:50] | She ran to the market. | 她去买东西了 |
| [09:52] | Up and out this early on a Saturday? Good for her. | 周六这么早就出去了吗 这样对她好 |
| [09:57] | She used to sleep a lot when we were together. | 她以往很喜欢睡懒觉 |
| [09:59] | It was probably just the depression and the meds. | 可能是抑郁和吃药导致的 |
| [10:04] | – Meds? – Oh, no, it was nothing serious. | – 药? – 没什么大事 |
| [10:06] | Just your everyday little pink pill to turn that frown upside down. | 只是每天服用的粉色药片 消除苦闷 |
| [10:12] | Alan, I gotta tell you, this is a little awkward… | 艾伦我必须告诉你 我有点尴尬 |
| [10:14] | No, please, don’t feel awkward. | 请千万不要觉得尴尬 |
| [10:16] | Look, we’re obviously going to be seeing each other a lot. | 我们显然今后要经常见面了 |
| [10:20] | There’s no reason for anybody to feel uncomfortable. | 双方都要感到自如才好 |
| [10:23] | That’s a very mature attitude. Thank you. | 这样的看法很成熟 谢谢你 |
| [10:26] | Well, you’re welcome. | 不用谢 |
| [10:29] | So let me make you some coffee. | 那么让我给你冲杯咖啡吧 |
| [10:38] | Are we supposed to believe… | 我们应该相信住在山洞的女人 |
| [10:39] | …that cavewomen waxed their legs and wore fur bikinis? | 会剃腿毛 穿皮制比基尼吗 |
| [10:44] | It’s not a documentary, Mom. | 这不是纪录片 妈 |
| [10:50] | You know, I’m not gonna be around forever… | 我不会永远都在你身旁 |
| [10:53] | …and the time will come when you’ll regret ignoring me. | 总有一天你会为忽视我而后悔的 |
| [11:01] | – Charlie, why do you hate me? – What? | – 查理 为什么你那么恨我 – 什么 |
| [11:06] | Whenever I come, | 不管我什么时候来 |
| [11:08] | you do everything you can to avoid spending time with me. | 你都想尽所有办法来躲避我 |
| [11:11] | Obviously not everything. | 显然没有用尽所有的办法 |
| [11:16] | We’re spending time together right now. | 我现在就在陪你啊 |
| [11:18] | You’re just staring at the television, and it’s not even on anymore. | 你只是在瞪一个已经关上了的电视 |
| [11:23] | I can still see you. | 我还能看见你呢 |
| [11:26] | Charlie, look at me. | 查理 看着我 |
| [11:39] | – How long you wanna do this for? – I want you to talk to me. | – 你想让我看你多久 – 我想和你说话 |
| [11:43] | Okay, I’m out of here. | 好了 我要走了 |
| [11:46] | No, no, wait, Berta. | 不 等等 波塔 |
| [11:48] | Come, sit, talk. | 来 坐下说话 |
| [11:49] | Mommy-and-me time over already? | 妈妈和你的亲密时间已经结束了? |
| [11:52] | – He hates me. – No, I don’t. | – 他恨我 – 我没有 |
| [11:55] | Please, Berta, I need you. | 波塔 求你了 我需要你 |
| [11:57] | I’m done. I wanna go home. | 我干完了 我要回家 |
| [11:58] | – Berta, I’m begging you. – Oh, all right. | – 波塔 求求你了 – 好吧 |
| [12:12] | So why do you hate your mother? | 你为什么恨你妈 |
| [12:20] | Here we go. | 来啦 |
| [12:23] | Coffee, juice, and my secret stash of Mint Milanos… | 咖啡 橙汁还有我冰箱冷冻室背面 |
| [12:26] | …from the back of the freezer. | 私藏的米兰薄荷饼 |
| [12:28] | Just a tip | 私人建议 |
| [12:29] | If you want quality cookies around here, you gotta hide them. | 如果你想吃美味的饼干 你得把它们藏起来 |
| [12:32] | Judith eats Pepperidge Farm like she’s going to the chair. | 朱蒂丝爱死了吃培珀莉手工饼干 |
| [12:35] | So tell me a little bit about yourself. Ever been married? | 让我们来谈谈你吧 结过婚吗 |
| [12:40] | – My wife passed away. – Oh, I’m so sorry. | – 我妻子去世了 – 太遗憾了 |
| [12:48] | No alimony, though. Gotta love that. | 不过不用付赡养费 真幸福 |
| [12:58] | Hey, hey, here’s a funny thing. | 跟你说个笑话 |
| [13:02] | My name’s Al and… | 我是艾 (Al) |
| [13:04] | And I give Judith money. | 我给朱蒂丝钱 (money) |
| [13:07] | So it’s… So it’s alimony. | 所以是赡养费 (Al-i-mony) |
| [13:12] | Wouldn’t it be “Al-i-money”? | 不是Al-i-money吗 |
| [13:15] | I was afraid you’d pick up on that. | 被你识破了 |
| [13:19] | – You got kids? – No. | – 你有孩子吗 – 没有 |
| [13:21] | Well, that’s a blessing. What with the dead wife and all. | 谢天谢地 再加上个死了的老婆怎么办啊 |
| [13:30] | – Mint Milanos? – No, thank you. | – 来点米兰薄荷饼吗 – 不了 谢谢 |
| [13:34] | So anyway, kids. Hey, you know, it’s not too late for you. | 说起孩子 你现在要也不晚啊 |
| [13:38] | Judith is a wonderful mother. | 朱蒂丝是个出色的母亲 |
| [13:40] | We’re not at that stage in our relationship. | 但我们的关系还没有到那一步 |
| [13:42] | Oh, of course not. | 是的 肯定 |
| [13:45] | On the other hand, you don’t wanna wait too long. | 话说回来 你也要抓紧时间 |
| [13:48] | She’s no spring chicken. | 她也不年轻了 |
| [13:51] | You know, eggwise. | 你知道的 卵子不多了 |
| [13:57] | So I’m having this nice Mother’s Day dinner with my slutty daughter… | 我在和我的懒女儿 她的白痴男朋友 |
| [14:00] | …and her idiot boyfriend. | 一起享用母亲节的晚餐 |
| [14:02] | Suddenly, the front door comes down and the room fills with tear gas. | 突然间前门被踢开 房间里充满了催泪瓦斯 |
| [14:06] | Next thing I know, I’m belly-up on the floor, | 醒来后 我发现自己四脚朝天 |
| [14:08] | hacking out a lung… | 躺在地板上猛烈咳嗽 |
| [14:10] | …while the cops are dragging out Bonnie and Claude in handcuffs. | 邦妮和克劳德被铐着压了出去 |
| [14:14] | Come to find out that the money that I loaned them to open a tanning salon… | 原来我借给他们开沙龙的钱 |
| [14:18] | …was used to turn my tool shed into a hydroponic pot farm. | 用来种植大麻了 |
| [14:23] | – Unbelievable. – Yeah. | – 简直不可置信! – 是啊 |
| [14:24] | Your daughter came to visit on Mother’s Day. | 你女儿在母亲节的时候来看你? |
| [14:27] | Sure, what ungrateful mutt | 当然了 有哪个忘恩负义的杂种 |
| [14:30] | doesn’t visit their mother on Mother’s Day? | 会不在母亲节看望自己的妈妈呢 |
| [14:36] | One year I forgot. Let it go. | 有一年我忘了 好了吧 |
| [14:38] | When’s my birthday? | 我的生日是几号 |
| [14:41] | – Excuse me? – You heard me. | – 你说什么 – 你听见了 |
| [14:46] | What’s that got to do with anything? | 这和什么有关系 |
| [14:48] | You don’t know your mother’s birthday? | 你不记得你妈妈的生日? |
| [14:51] | – Well, not by heart. – Charlie. | – 没有熟记在心 – 查理 |
| [14:55] | What? She changes it all the time. | 怎么了 她的生日变来变去 |
| [14:58] | Just the year, not the day. | 又没改日子 只是年份 |
| [15:01] | Hey, I just realized something. I can leave. | 我才发现 我怎么还坐在这 |
| [15:05] | Fine. But before you go, just tell me one thing. | 好吧 但在你走之前 告诉我一件事 |
| [15:09] | – What? – Why do you hate me? | – 什么啊 – 你为什么恨我 |
| [15:12] | Oh, Mom, for God’s sakes, l… Rose! | 我的妈呀 上帝 我… 罗斯! |
| [15:17] | No, no, no. Rose, wait. Rose, come on in. | 不不 罗斯 等一下 进来 |
| [15:23] | Look, my mom’s here. You like my mom. | 我妈妈在这呢 你喜欢我妈的 |
| [15:27] | – Oh, sure. Hi, Evelyn. – Hello, dear. | – 您好 伊夫林 – 你好 亲爱的 |
| [15:33] | – Are those my pants? – Oh, no. | – 这是我的裤子吗 – 当然不是了 |
| [15:36] | I bought these. | 是我买的 |
| [15:38] | But I think this might be your wallet and keys. | 但这个钱包和钥匙可能是你的 |
| [15:46] | Evelyn, you get younger every time I see you. | 伊夫林 您真是越来越年轻了 |
| [15:48] | Oh, aren’t you a dear. And thank you for the birthday card. | 你可真会说话 谢谢你给我的生日卡 |
| [15:52] | – Oh, did you get it on time? – Yes, I did, and it was lovely. | – 您及时收到了吗 – 是的 我很喜欢 |
| [15:55] | So sweet of you to remember me. | 你能记着我的生日 真是太让我感动了 |
| [15:57] | How could anybody forget your birthday? | 有谁会不记得您的生日呢 |
| [16:06] | Well, yeah. You know, she does become a little emotional at times, huh? | 是啊 她确实有时候很情绪化 |
| [16:10] | I thought she was getting over your divorce. | 我以为她是受离婚的影响 |
| [16:12] | No, no. She was over the divorce | 不 当我还在收拾东西的时候 |
| [16:14] | while I was still packing. | 她就已经恢复过来了 |
| [16:16] | No, what you’re seeing is low blood sugar. | 你所看到的是低血糖的表现 |
| [16:21] | The trick to that is | 对付它的窍门是 |
| [16:23] | to always have some Fun Size Snickers in your pocket. | 随身携带几条士力架夹心巧克力 |
| [16:26] | – It’ll perk her right up. – Really? | – 会让她立刻振作起来 – 真的吗 |
| [16:28] | Oh, yeah. Oh, and here’s another tip. | 绝对 再告诉你一个秘密 |
| [16:31] | When she starts crying for no reason, and she will… | 当她无缘无故的开始哭时 |
| [16:37] | …never say, “Don’t cry.” And try not to touch her. | 千万别说”别哭了” 而且别去碰她 |
| [16:41] | – Okay. – Or whistle. | 好的 或者吹口哨 |
| [16:44] | Never, ever whistle. | 永远不要吹口哨 |
| [16:51] | Okay, maybe I forgot a birthday or two. | 就算我忘了你的一两个生日 |
| [16:54] | Maybe I don’t return every single call. | 没有回你的每一个电话 |
| [16:56] | But that doesn’t mean I hate her. | 这并不代表我恨你 |
| [16:58] | Was he breast-fed? | 他是吃母奶长大的吗 |
| [17:03] | Of course he was. Not by me personally. | 他当然是了 虽然不是我喂的 |
| [17:09] | That’s interesting. I see the bras that come through here… | 这回有趣了 我在这见过的胸罩 |
| [17:12] | …and he does tend to favor the big yams. | 都是超大杯的 |
| [17:14] | – I do not. – Oh, really? | – 我哪有 – 是吗 |
| [17:19] | – Raquel Welch. – Hey, that’s a damn fine film. | – 拉蔻儿·薇芝 – 那是部很好的电影 |
| [17:24] | Come to think of it, the night we were together… | 我想起来了 有一晚我们在一起时 |
| [17:26] | …he did spend a freakish amount of time on my boobies. | 他确实疯狂的在我乳房上不肯挪开 |
| [17:32] | I mean, foreplay is one thing, | 我是说 是需要性交前的嬉戏 |
| [17:35] | but, golly, it was like making love to a cat. | 可我就像是在和一只猫做爱 |
| [17:38] | Rose, for God’s sake, you’re talking to my mother. | 罗斯 我的上帝 你是在和我妈说话 |
| [17:41] | Sorry. A very giving cat. | 对不起 一只如饥似渴的猫 |
| [17:46] | He’s always had an oral fixation. | 他总是有口部的需求 |
| [17:48] | When he was little, he used to suck on other children’s thumbs. | 在他还小的时候 就喜欢吃别的小孩子的手 |
| [17:52] | And now he’s always got a bottle of booze in his mouth. | 而现在嘴里总叼着一瓶烈酒 |
| [17:55] | My therapist says that’s his way of stuffing his feelings. | 我的私人医生说 这是他在寻找满足感 |
| [17:58] | That’s what my therapist says. | 我的私人医生也这么说 |
| [18:00] | Hell, I could’ve told you that for free. | 晕 这我不要钱都能告诉你 |
| [18:04] | – Hey, I’m here. – Hey, it’s Jake. | – 我回来了 – 是杰克 |
| [18:07] | Back from his sleepover. Look who’s here to see you, buddy. | 他从朋友家回来了 伙计快看谁来看你了 |
| [18:11] | Hi, Grandma. | 奶奶好 |
| [18:14] | Hello, sweetheart. Thank you for the lovely birthday card. | 我的甜心 谢谢你可爱的生日卡 |
| [18:19] | – My mom picked it out. – Oh, and you love her, don’t you? | – 是我妈选的 – 你很爱她对不对 |
| [18:23] | – Sure. – Thank you. You can go now. | – 是啊 – 谢谢你 你去玩吧 |
| [18:28] | – Can I go too? – We’re not done with you. | – 我也能走吗 – 不 还没说完呢 |
| [18:32] | – Where were we? – We were trying to figure out… | – 刚才说到哪了 – 我们正试图找出 |
| [18:34] | …why Charlie hates you. – Yeah. | – 查理那么恨你的原因 – 对 |
| [18:37] | Well, Charlie? | 那么 查理? |
| [18:40] | Okay, fine, here it is. | 好吧 我说给你听 |
| [18:42] | I’m not saying I hate you, but if I did… | 我不是说我恨你 但是如果我有的话 |
| [18:45] | …it might have to do with the fact that you’re a narcissistic bloodsucker… | 可能是因为你是个自恋的吸血鬼 |
| [18:49] | …who drove my father into an early grave. | 你把我爸爸很早害死 |
| [18:51] | Then married a succession of men | 之后你嫁给一连串的男人 |
| [18:53] | who couldn’t care less about Alan and me… | 他从没有一个关心过我和艾伦 |
| [18:55] | …which was fine with you… | 你也毫不在乎 |
| [18:57] | …because you looked at us like dancing monkeys… | 因为在你眼里我俩就是 两只滑稽的猴子 |
| [18:59] | …you could just haul out whenever it suited you. | 你高兴就可以不管我们 |
| [19:02] | And when it didn’t, you sent us off to boarding school or camp… | 把我们扔在寄宿学校 夏令营 |
| [19:06] | …or that kibbutz in Israel, where we got beat up… | 或者放在以色列的集体农场 |
| [19:08] | …because we weren’t even Jewish! | 我们因为不是犹太人而遭受毒打 |
| [19:13] | And now, now you show up here every chance you get… | 而现在你每次出现 |
| [19:16] | …to lay a guilt trip on me… | 都要让我感到内疚 |
| [19:18] | …for not appreciating my cold, Ionely, loveless childhood. | 你想过我冰冷 孤独 缺少母爱的童年吗 |
| [19:26] | Well… | 看来 |
| [19:30] | …obviously you’re not ready to talk about it. | 你显然没准备好谈论这个问题 |
| [19:39] | Alan, you really don’t have to do this. | 艾伦 你真的不用这么做 |
| [19:41] | Hey, hey, I am a licensed chiropractor. | 我可是认证的脊椎指压治疗者 |
| [19:43] | If Jake had a sore throat, | 如果杰克嗓子疼的话 |
| [19:45] | I’m sure you’d treat him, prescribe something. | 我相信你也会给他开点药的 |
| [19:47] | But it’s nothing, I think I just slept wrong. | 可我没事 只是睡觉落枕了 |
| [19:49] | Oh, that’s probably because you’re not used to our bed. | 可能你还没有适应我们的床 |
| [19:56] | So have you…? Have you met Judith’s parents? | 你见过朱蒂丝的父母了吗 |
| [19:58] | – No. – Oh, they are just gonna love you. | – 还没有 – 他们一定会爱死你的 |
| [20:01] | They were devastated by the divorce. | 他们因为离婚的事差点崩溃 |
| [20:03] | Not to mention some of her unfortunate choices thereafter. | 何况她从那之后不幸的选择了… |
| [20:08] | – Unfortunate choices? – Oh, you know, that’s not important. | – 不幸的选择了什么? – 那不重要 |
| [20:11] | What’s important is they’re just gonna be relieved to see she’s dating a man. | 重要是见到她和男人约会 他们就能放下心了 |
| [20:18] | You carry a lot of tension up here. | 你肩膀怎么那么紧张啊 |
| [20:23] | Alan. | 艾伦 |
| [20:32] | Didn’t you just pay your alimony? | 你不是刚付过赡养费吗 |
| [20:34] | This is the pediatrician’s bill. | 这是给儿科医师的 |
| [20:36] | – Jake was sick? – No, no. | – 杰克生病了吗 – 没有 |
| [20:38] | The pediatrician had to see an orthopedist. | 儿科医师要去整形外科 |
| [20:43] | You know Mom’s birthday was a couple weeks ago? | 你知道几星期前是妈妈的生日吗 |
| [20:46] | Yeah, I sent her some flowers and a card. | 知道啊 我送了她一束花还有生日卡 |
| [20:48] | Oh, man. Would it have killed you to put my name on the card? | 兄弟 你就不会把我的名字也写上吗 |
| [20:51] | I did put your name on it. I wrote, | 事实上我写你名字了 我上面写着 |
| [20:54] | “Love, your sons, Alan and Charlie.” | 爱你的儿子们 艾伦和查理 |
| [20:56] | – Damn. – What? | – 妈的 – 怎么了 |
| [20:58] | She tricked me into thinking I forgot. | 她竟然耍我 我还以为我忘了呢 |