| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:04] | Here we are. | 我们到了 |
| [00:05] | Be it ever so humble. | 房子有点简陋 |
| [00:06] | Wow, this is some house. | 哇 这地方真了不起 |
| [00:09] | If you ever decide to sell, I want the listing. | 如果你想卖的话 请交给我处理 |
| [00:12] | Well, you’d have to kill my mom for it, so… | 那你得先杀了我妈才行 所以… |
| [00:15] | sure. | 没问题 |
| [00:19] | Can I make you a drink? | 你要喝点什么吗? |
| [00:20] | Charlie, we both know I’m gonna sleep with you. | 查理 你我都知道我们要上床了 |
| [00:23] | You don’t have to liquor me up. | 你没有必要把我灌醉 |
| [00:26] | Hey, I’ve been doing this a long time. | 嘿 我这招已经用很久了 |
| [00:28] | Trust me, you’ll want a drink. | 相信我 你会想喝一杯的 |
| [00:31] | Oh, hey. | 嗨 |
| [00:33] | I didn’t know you guys were home. | 我不知道你们在家 |
| [00:34] | Lydia, this is my brother Alan. | 莉迪亚 这是我弟 艾伦 |
| [00:36] | Alan, hi. | 艾伦 嗨 |
| [00:37] | Hi. | 嗨 |
| [00:38] | So sorry to hear about your troubles. | 对你的遭遇感到很遗憾 |
| [00:40] | Troubles? What troubles? | 遭遇? 什么遭遇? |
| [00:42] | Oh, maybe I have it wrong. | 也许是我搞错了 |
| [00:43] | Charlie, didn’t you tell me he was divorced, | 查理 你不是有跟我说他离婚 |
| [00:45] | broke and living on your couch? | 破产 而且睡在沙发上? |
| [00:52] | I don’t know what she’s talking about. | 我不知道她在鬼扯些什么 |
| [00:55] | Well, I am going through a bit of a rough patch, | 嗯 我的确是遭遇了一些麻烦 |
| [00:57] | but I try not to think about it too much. | 但我尽量不去想太多 |
| [00:59] | Good for you. | 那就好 |
| [01:01] | I’d be suicidal. | 是我早自杀了 |
| [01:04] | You hear that? You have options. | 你听到了吗? 你有选择 |
| [01:08] | Anyway, this is my nephew Jake. | 这是我的侄子 杰克 |
| [01:10] | Hello, Jake. Hi. | -哈啰 杰克 -嗨 |
| [01:12] | So, what grade are you in? | 你现在几年级了? |
| [01:13] | Seventh. | 7年级 |
| [01:15] | Well, don’t you worry when the other kids make fun of you. | 别去担心别的小孩取笑你 |
| [01:17] | You’ll show ’em someday. | 总有一天你会反击的 |
| [01:19] | Nobody makes fun of me. | 没有人取笑我 |
| [01:22] | You’re kidding? | 不会吧? |
| [01:24] | Why would anyone make fun of me? | 为什么会有人取笑我? |
| [01:27] | And this is my housekeeper Berta. | 然后这是我的管家 贝塔 |
| [01:30] | Berta, Lydia. | 贝塔 莉迪亚 |
| [01:31] | Choose your words carefully, Slim. | 讲话要谨慎 窈窕妹 |
| [01:34] | Slim? | 窈窕妹? |
| [01:36] | Why, thank you. | 谢谢… |
| [01:37] | I watch what I eat. | 我有在控制饮食 |
| [01:39] | Going in or coming out? | 吃进去还是拉出来的? |
| [01:48] | Hey, why don’t we forget the drinks, and go out | 嘿 不如我们别喝了 |
| [01:50] | on the deck and enjoy the sunset? | 到阳台上欣赏夕阳如何? |
| [01:53] | All right. Well, it was so nice to meet all of you. | 好啊 很高兴认识大家 |
| [01:56] | Uh-huh. Yeah. Sure. | -嗯 -是啊 -当然 |
| [02:00] | You didn’t have to be so rude. | 你没必要这么无礼 |
| [02:06] | You said they were laughing with me. | 你也提过他们取笑我的事 |
| [02:09] | Hey, I got my own problems. | 嘿 我自己都有麻烦了 |
| [02:40] | Oh, Charlie… | 哦 查理… |
| [02:43] | No need to thank me. | 不要太感谢我 |
| [02:46] | I wasn’t going to. | 我没这个打算 |
| [02:50] | Excuse me? | 你说什么? |
| [02:51] | I mean, it was very nice, | 我是说 刚才很棒 |
| [02:53] | it’s just if I’d known you were gonna camp down there | 只是 早知道你要在这里露营 |
| [02:55] | I would’ve given you a lantern and some marshmallows. | 我就会给你一个提灯和一些棉花糖 (比喻查理干太久了) |
| [03:00] | Hey, I was just trying to be thorough. | 嘿 我只是不想随便夫衍了事 |
| [03:02] | You were showing off. | 你只是在炫耀 |
| [03:03] | No, no, if I were showing off | 不 不 如果我要炫耀 |
| [03:05] | I’d have done it with no hands. | 我就会不用手跟你做 |
| [03:08] | So I can expect this kind of effort | 所以我能预期每次我们上床 |
| [03:10] | every time we get in bed? | 你都会这么努力? |
| [03:12] | Well, maybe not during flu season. | 也许在流感季节没办法 |
| [03:16] | And it’s important to have variety. | 而且多样化是很重要的 |
| [03:18] | I’m not always gonna swing for the long ball, | 我不会一直想打长打 |
| [03:20] | every once in a while I’ll lay down a bunt, | 有时候也会来个短打 |
| [03:22] | and how did you manage to turn this into a bad thing? | 而你怎么会把这个想成是坏事? |
| [03:26] | It’s not a bad thing. | 我没有说是坏事 |
| [03:28] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [03:30] | Which is not to say if you were open to suggestion | 只是说如果你不能接受我的建议 |
| [03:32] | it couldn’t be better. | 就不能做的更好 |
| [03:33] | Oh, really? | 哦 真的吗? |
| [03:35] | And how could it have been better? | 那要怎么做的更好? |
| [03:36] | Ooh, looks like I pushed a button. | 哦 看起来我让你一触即发啰 (Push the button有按摩女生阴核的意思) |
| [03:39] | Yeah, well, it looks like I didn’t. | 是啊 讲的好像我没做一样 |
| [03:42] | Charlie… | 查理… |
| [03:44] | you can push an elevator button a hundred times, | 你按电梯钮100次 |
| [03:47] | it still won’t come any faster. | 他也不会比较快来 |
| [03:52] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [03:53] | Maybe next time I’ll take the stairs. | 也许下次我走楼梯 |
| [03:55] | Oh, come on… | 拜托啦… |
| [03:58] | don’t be like that. | 不要这样嘛 |
| [04:01] | You were magnificent. | 你很棒 |
| [04:05] | Astonishing. | 很惊人 |
| [04:07] | You’ve ruined me for other men. | 你让我觉得其它男人都是废物 |
| [04:11] | There, was that so hard? | 看吧 这样讲很难吗? |
| [04:14] | You boys and your little egos. | 你们男孩也有小小的自尊心喔 |
| [04:17] | Okay, okay, stop. | 好 好 先停 |
| [04:18] | In this bed, we don’t say “boys” | 在这张床上 我们不能说”男孩” |
| [04:20] | and we don’t say “little.” | 也不能说”小” |
| [04:21] | Fine. | 好 |
| [04:24] | You want me to try again? | 你想要再来一次吗? |
| [04:26] | No, I’m a bit chafed. | 不了 我有一点擦伤 |
| [04:29] | Let’s make the next few minutes about pleasing you. | 不如接下来的几分钟 让我来取悦你 |
| [04:31] | A few minutes? That’s all I get? | 几分钟? 我就得到这些? |
| [04:34] | Trust me, darling, | 相信我 亲爱的 |
| [04:35] | with me, that’s all you can handle. | 跟我做 几分钟就够你爽了 |
| [04:44] | Hey, Dad? Yeah? | -嘿 爸 -嗯? |
| [04:46] | Do you like Uncle Charlie’s new girlfriend? | 你喜欢查理叔叔的新女友吗? |
| [04:48] | Well, I just met her the one time, so… | 嗯 我只见过她一次面 所以… |
| [04:52] | no, not really. | 不 不喜欢 |
| [04:54] | You know who she reminds me of? | 你知道她让我想起谁吗? |
| [04:56] | The girls at school who think they rule the world | 那些在学校 自认为统治了全世界的女孩 |
| [04:58] | just ’cause they got their boobs. | 就因为她们有奶子 |
| [05:01] | Well, I hate to tell you, buddy, | 我虽然很不愿意讲 小老弟 |
| [05:03] | but they kinda do. | 不过她们并没说错 |
| [05:06] | I don’t get it. | 我不明白 |
| [05:07] | I wouldn’t be mean if I had boobs. | 如果我有奶子 我不会这么恶劣 |
| [05:10] | That’s very admirable. | 真令人钦佩 |
| [05:24] | Hi there. | 嗨 帅哥 |
| [05:25] | I like you very much. | 我非常喜欢你 |
| [05:29] | Please don’t do that. | 请别这么做 |
| [05:31] | Do what? I’m just being nice. | 做什么? 我只是在示好 |
| [05:34] | I’m serious. Cut it out. | 我是说真的 快停止 |
| [05:38] | Hey. | 嗨 |
| [05:39] | Hey. | 嗨 |
| [05:40] | (girly voice): Hello, big boy. | 哈啰 大帅哥 |
| [05:46] | You really need to get him into a sport. | 你应该要让他去做些其它运动 |
| [05:50] | I’ll need a sports bra. | 那我会需要运动型内衣 |
| [05:54] | I said quit it. | 我说了快停止 |
| [05:57] | What are you watching? | 你们在看什么? |
| [05:59] | I don’t know, some Disney crap. | 我不知道 某迪斯尼的烂片 |
| [06:03] | Where’s your girlfriend? | 你女友呢? |
| [06:05] | Hey, my boob! | 嘿 小心我的奶 |
| [06:09] | She had to go pick up her kids. | 她得去接她的小孩 |
| [06:11] | Probably from therapy. | 大概是去精神病院接 |
| [06:14] | What’s that supposed to mean? | 这话是什么意思? |
| [06:15] | We don’t like her. | 我们不喜欢她 |
| [06:16] | Who’s “we”? | “我们”是指谁? |
| [06:18] | Me and Dad. | 我和爸 |
| [06:19] | No, no, I d… uh… | 不 不 我…呃… |
| [06:22] | That’s, that’s not… | 那…那不是… |
| [06:23] | I mean, she seems really… | 我是说 她似乎很… |
| [06:25] | No, we don’t like her. | 是的 我们不喜欢她 |
| [06:29] | All right, she might be a bit outspoken, | 好吧 也许她讲话有点直 |
| [06:30] | but I happen to find that very attractive. | 但我反而觉得这样很有魅力 |
| [06:32] | She must be dynamite in the sack. | 她在床上一定吓吓叫 |
| [06:39] | Where do you get this stuff from? | 你从哪学来这句话? |
| [06:41] | Cinemax. | Cinemax电影台 |
| [06:44] | Well, not that my sex life is any of your business… | 我的性生活应该不关你们的事 |
| [06:48] | It’s not his business. | 不关他的事 |
| [06:49] | It’s nobody’s business. | 不关任何人的事 |
| [06:51] | So, what does she do for a living? | 那么 她是做什么的? |
| [06:53] | Besides being a stone cold bee-yatch. | 除了她是个冷若冰霜的婊啊子之外 |
| [06:59] | HBO. | HBO电影台 |
| [07:05] | She sells real estate. | 她是搞房地产的 |
| [07:07] | Oh, like Mom. | 哦 跟妈一样 |
| [07:08] | No, not like Mom. | 不 跟妈不一样 |
| [07:12] | Lydia sells high-end homes in Beverly Hills, | 莉迪亚卖的是比佛利山庄的高级住宅 |
| [07:15] | and Mom sells high-end homes… | 而妈卖的高级住宅… |
| [07:17] | mostly on the beach. | 大部份都在海边 |
| [07:18] | What are you getting so defensive about? | 你怎么防御心那么重? |
| [07:21] | I’m not getting defensive! | 我没有防御心很重 |
| [07:22] | Lydia sells homes on the bee-yatch. | 莉迪亚卖靠海啊滩的房子 |
| [07:33] | All right, all right, that’s it. Go to bed. | 好了 好了 够了 快上床睡觉 |
| [07:36] | I wasn’t mean before I got my boobs. | 在我有奶子之前没这么恶劣 |
| [07:47] | Boy, puberty is gonna hit him like a shovel. | 哇 青春期即将像个铲子般 打在他身上 |
| [07:57] | Good to have you back, Mr. Harper. | -很荣幸你再度光临 哈波先生 |
| [07:58] | Thank you, Bobby. | -谢谢你 巴比 |
| [07:59] | We haven’t seen your mother here for quite some time. | 我们有很长的时间没见到你母亲了 |
| [08:01] | Well, maybe you just didn’t recognize her. | 也许你只是不认得她了 |
| [08:03] | Like Satan, my mother can take many forms. | 我妈跟撒旦一样 能以各种形式出现 |
| [08:06] | (chuckles): Good one. | 了不起 |
| [08:08] | I’m ready to order. | 我可以点餐了 |
| [08:10] | Of course. | 当然 |
| [08:11] | Apologies for the frivolity. | 我为我的轻薄道歉 |
| [08:13] | What would you like? | 请问你要点什么? |
| [08:15] | I’ll have the seared ahi tuna filet. | 我想要一份烧烤半熟鲔鱼片 |
| [08:17] | Good choice. I want it very rare. | -选的好 -必须要刚好烤的半熟 |
| [08:18] | That’s how we serve it. | 那是这道菜的卖点 |
| [08:20] | I want it red in the middle, not pink. | 我要鱼片中间是红色 而非粉红 |
| [08:21] | Shall do. If it’s pink, don’t even bother bringing it. | -没问题 -如果是粉红色 就别送上来了 |
| [08:24] | Got it. Just give it to someone who doesn’t know what rare is. | -了解 -就直接给那些不懂何谓”半熟”的人好了 |
| [08:26] | Of course. You know what? Forget it. | -当然 -你知道吗?算了好了 |
| [08:27] | You won’t get it right. | 你们一定做不到 |
| [08:30] | Is your salmon fresh? | 你们的鲑鱼新鲜吗? |
| [08:31] | Flown in today. | 今天才空运过来 |
| [08:33] | What time? | 几点? |
| [08:34] | I’ll ask the chef. | 我得去问主厨 |
| [08:36] | Many forms. I thought you were joking. | 很多形式 我以为你在开玩笑 |
| [08:41] | You eat here regularly? | 你常来这里用餐吗? |
| [08:42] | Not anymore. | 不会再来了 |
| [08:45] | So, listen, about this weekend. | 那么 关于这个周末 |
| [08:47] | My ex is going to be out of town, | 我前夫要出城 |
| [08:49] | so I’ll have the kids. | 所以我要顾小孩 |
| [08:50] | Whoa, whoa, whoa, Lydia, no one loves the little ones | 哇 哇 哇 莉迪亚 没有人 |
| [08:53] | more than old Uncle Charlie, | 比查理叔叔更爱小孩子了 |
| [08:55] | but don’t you think it might be | 不过你不觉得现在就见你的小孩 |
| [08:57] | a bit soon for me to meet your kids? | 有点太快了吗? |
| [08:58] | Oh, I don’t want you to meet them. | 哦 我不希望你见他们 |
| [09:00] | Why not? | 为什么? |
| [09:01] | Because I’m very careful about who I expose them to. | 因为我很在意他们接触到的人 |
| [09:04] | What’s that supposed to mean? | 这话什么意思? |
| [09:05] | Charlie, please. | 查理 求求你 |
| [09:06] | Why can’t I expose myself to your kids? | 我什么我不能和小孩接触? |
| [09:08] | I mean, why can’t I meet your kids? | 我是说 为什么我不能见你的小孩? |
| [09:11] | Please don’t make me hurt your feelings. | 请别逼我伤害你的感情 |
| [09:14] | You can’t hurt my feelings. | 你不可能伤害我的感情 |
| [09:16] | All right, fine. | 好吧 |
| [09:18] | You’re a professional boy toy, | 你是一个称职的女人玩伴 |
| [09:20] | a perpetual adolescent leading a dissolute life. | 一个永远年轻 过着糜烂生活的人 |
| [09:23] | You may have your uses, | 你也许有你的用处 |
| [09:24] | but you’re not the kind of man | 但我不认为你是那种 |
| [09:25] | I want around my children. | 可以让小孩围绕在身边的男人 |
| [09:27] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [09:29] | What made you think that would hurt my feelings? | 那你怎会觉得这样讲会伤害我的感情? |
| [09:32] | 2:00. Jet Blue from Vancouver. | 2点 捷蓝航空 从温哥华起飞 |
| [09:34] | Would you like me to find out what the movie was? | 需要帮你查机上播放的影片名称吗? |
| [09:36] | Don’t bother, I’ll just have the capellini. | 不用了 我要点一份意大利天使面 |
| [09:40] | And I’ll have the pork chop with a baked potato. | 那我要猪排加烤马铃薯 |
| [09:43] | How about a little angioplasty for dessert? | 那要不要来个血管扩张手术当甜点? |
| [09:46] | Hey, I like a nice pork chop once in a while. | 嘿 我偶尔也想吃美味的猪排 |
| [09:48] | Fine, I’m not going to tell you how to eat. | 好吧 那我就不告诉你如何吃才健康了 |
| [09:51] | Really? | 真的吗? |
| [09:52] | Even if I chew slowly for your pleasure? | 如果我为了取悦你而细嚼慢咽呢? |
| [09:57] | So, yay or nay on the pork chop? | 那么 猪排要还是不要? |
| [10:01] | I’ll have the spinach and goat cheese salad. | 我要波菜和羊酪色拉 |
| [10:05] | Good choice. Thank you. | -选的好 -谢谢 |
| [10:06] | On the food. | 我是指食物 |
| [10:14] | How many pieces of bacon are you going to eat? | 你到底要吃几片培根? |
| [10:17] | My record’s 14. | 我的纪录是14片 |
| [10:19] | I barfed, but it still counts. | 我吐了 但纪录有效 |
| [10:21] | Do you know what’s going to happen | 你知道如果你一直这样吃下去 |
| [10:24] | if you continue to eat like this? | 会发生什么事吗? |
| [10:25] | Yeah, I’m gonna barf. | 知道 我会吐 |
| [10:30] | Alan, doesn’t this poor child | 艾伦 这个可怜的小孩 |
| [10:32] | already have enough strikes against him? | 还没有遭受到足够的打击吗? |
| [10:33] | He’s fine, Mom. | 他没事的 妈 |
| [10:35] | All right, but when Jerry Springer has to knock down a wall | 好吧 不过当杰瑞史平格必须打破一面墙 |
| [10:38] | just to get him out of his house, | 才能把他从房子里救出来时 |
| [10:39] | don’t come crying to me. | 到时别哭着来找我 |
| [10:42] | That wasn’t Jerry, that was Dr. Phil. | 那不是杰瑞 是菲尔博士 (均为脱口秀主持人 后者较高大) |
| [10:46] | I’m not saying it wasn’t a turn-on, | 我并没说那样不刺激 |
| [10:47] | I just think you need to trim a fingernail. | 我只是觉得你应该去修指甲 |
| [10:50] | Oh. Hey, Mom. | 嗨 妈 |
| [10:52] | Uh, Mom, this is Lydia. Lydia, my mother. | 妈 这是莉迪亚 莉迪亚 我妈 |
| [10:55] | Oh, pleased to meet you. | 很高兴认识你 |
| [10:57] | Likewise. | 我也是 |
| [11:03] | Boy, I’m glad I stopped coming to work high. | 哇 我真高兴能看到这一幕 |
| [11:10] | SO,lydia | 那么 莉迪亚 |
| [11:11] | what you do? | 你是干什么的? |
| [11:12] | I mean, besides my son. | 我是说 除了干我儿子之外 |
| [11:17] | I’m in real estate. | 我是做房地产的 |
| [11:18] | How interesting, so am I. | 真有趣 我也是 |
| [11:21] | Oh, yes. Evelyn Harper. | 对哦 伊夫林哈波 |
| [11:23] | I recognize you from your bus bench ads. | 我从公交车椅子上的广告认识你的 |
| [11:26] | People all over town are sitting on your face. | 全城的人都坐在你的脸上 |
| [11:32] | Well, dear, maybe someday, | 亲爱的 也许有一天 |
| [11:34] | if you work hard, people will be sitting | 如果你努力工作 人们也会坐 |
| [11:38] | on your face, too. | 在你的脸上的 |
| [11:41] | Thank you. Although when I get to be your age, | 谢谢 不过我到你这个年纪的时候 |
| [11:43] | I hope I won’t be schlepping to open houses | 我希望我不必长途拔涉到待售屋 |
| [11:45] | in order to make a buck. | 就为了赚一点钱 |
| [11:46] | (chuckles) Don’t say “schlep,” darling. | 不要说”长途拔涉” 亲爱的 |
| [11:48] | You’re a bit too vanilla to pull it off. | 你太平凡了所以不可能成功 |
| [11:52] | So, Charlie, how long have you been seeing this lovely woman? | 那么 查理 你和这个漂亮的女人交往多久了? |
| [11:56] | Uh… how long has it been, sweetie? | 呃…有多久了 亲爱的? |
| [12:00] | Are you telling me you don’t remember when we met? | 你是说你不记得我们何时认识的吗? |
| [12:02] | The way he drinks? | 他那时喝醉了吧? |
| [12:04] | There’s a good chance he doesn’t remember coming down the stairs. | 很有可能他连下楼梯都不记得 |
| [12:07] | Did his father drink? | 他的父亲也喝酒吗? |
| [12:08] | What choice did he have? | 他有什么选择? |
| [12:11] | Charlie, don’t be snide. | 查理 别装了 |
| [12:13] | And stand up straight. | 身体站直 |
| [12:17] | This is so weird. | 这太奇怪了 |
| [12:19] | Well, I really must run. | 嗯 我真的得走了 |
| [12:21] | -Oh, me, too–can I walk you out? -Oh, how nice. | -我也是 我可以陪你一起吗? -那太好了 |
| [12:23] | Are you sure you don’t want to stay | 你确定不想留下来 |
| [12:25] | and finish putting on your makeup? | 然后把你的妆化完吗? |
| [12:27] | That’s okay, I’m done. | 不用 我已经化好妆了 |
| [12:30] | Would you like to borrow some? | 你想借去用吗? |
| [12:31] | No, thanks, I’m allergic to the drugstore brands. | 不 谢了 地摊货会让我过敏 |
| [12:45] | What? | 怎么了? |
| [12:48] | And they call you slow. | 他们居然还说你迟钝 |
| [12:51] | You’re kidding, right? | 你在开玩笑 对吧? |
| [12:52] | You don’t see it? | 你没看见吗? |
| [12:54] | See what? | 看见什么? |
| [12:55] | Lydia and Mom. | 莉迪亚和妈 |
| [12:56] | What about them? | 她们怎么了? |
| [12:57] | Come on, Charlie. The only difference | 拜托 查理 那两个女人唯一的不同 |
| [13:00] | between those two broads is you came out of one and you’re… | 就是一个是生你的 一个是你… |
| [13:03] | Hold on, hold on. | 等一下 等一下 |
| [13:11] | You think Lydia’s like Mom? | 你们认为莉迪亚很像妈? |
| [13:13] | No. We think Lydia is Mom. | 不 我们认为莉迪亚就是妈 |
| [13:16] | Okay, okay, you guys are nuts. | 够了 够了 你们都疯了 |
| [13:20] | And this conversation is over. | 对话到此结束 |
| [13:24] | Who calls me slow? | 谁说我迟钝? |
| [13:32] | And I’ll tell you another thing. | 我要告诉你另一件事 |
| [13:34] | There’s a lot of women in this town who work in real estate. | 这个城里有很多女人从事房地产业 |
| [13:36] | I thought this conversation was over. | 我已为这个话题已经结束了 |
| [13:38] | They all wear the suits and the designer bags. | 她们都穿着套装 手拿名牌手提袋 |
| [13:40] | It’s like a uniform. | 就像制服一样 |
| [13:42] | They could be firemen. | 搞不好是消防员 |
| [13:44] | And Mom’s Lexus is a two-door, | 而且妈的 Lexus 是两门的 |
| [13:46] | while Lydia’s Lexus is a four-door. | 而莉迪亚的 Lexus 是四门的 |
| [13:48] | Worlds apart. | 真是天壤之别 |
| [13:50] | It is worlds apart. | 的确是天壤之别 |
| [13:51] | The two-door is a selfish car. | 两门的是只给自己开的车 |
| [13:53] | The four-door is a family car. | 而四门的是属于家庭的车 |
| [13:55] | And you know why Lydia has a family car? | 你知道为什么莉迪亚有家庭的车吗? |
| [13:57] | Because Lydia has children. | 因为莉迪亚有小孩 |
| [13:59] | Unlike our mother. | 跟我们的妈不一样 |
| [14:02] | Shut up. | 闭嘴 |
| [14:04] | Charlie, it’s okay. | 查理 没关系的 |
| [14:06] | You’ve been working out your maternal issues | 你这辈子一直跟其它女人搞在一起 |
| [14:08] | by having sex with other women your entire life. | 好摆脱你的恋母情结 |
| [14:10] | All you’re doing now | 但你现在所做的 |
| [14:11] | is cutting out the middle man. | 就跟上了老妈没什么两样 |
| [14:12] | Oh, that is just sick. | 真的有够变态 |
| [14:16] | My point exactly. | 我的论点很明确 |
| [14:19] | Stupid idiot. | 愚蠢的白痴 |
| [14:23] | You’re just jealous. | 你只是在忌妒 |
| [14:25] | Lydia’s smart, funny, and sexy, way sexier than Mom. | 莉迪亚聪明 风趣又性感 比妈性感的多 |
| [14:31] | Not that I think Mom is sexy. | 我并不是认为妈很性感 |
| [14:32] | New thought, new thought, new thought. | 想点别的 想点别的 想点别的 |
| [14:35] | Oh, Charlie. | 哦 查理 |
| [14:37] | If you could get rid of disturbing thoughts that easily, | 如果你能那么轻易 把烦恼一扫而空的话 |
| [14:40] | I wouldn’t be making a quilt out of your old underwear. | 我就不会用你的旧内裤 做成一条被子了 |
| [14:43] | Hi, Rose. | 嗨 萝丝 |
| [14:46] | I brought you a little gift. | 我带了一件小礼物给你 |
| [14:49] | OedipusRex? | 伊底帕斯王? |
| [14:51] | It’s about a guy who sleeps with his mother | 这是关于一个男的跟他母亲做爱 |
| [14:53] | and then pokes his eyes out. | 最后刺瞎自己的眼睛 |
| [14:54] | I’m giving away the ending, | 我把结局泄露出来 |
| [14:55] | because I’m afraid you might be blind | 因为我怕到时候你跟像你妈的人做爱 |
| [14:58] | by the time you get to it. | 眼睛会瞎掉 |
| [14:59] | Where do you get this stuff? | 你从哪听来这些东西? |
| [15:00] | You’ve never even seen Lydia. | 你又没见过莉迪亚 |
| [15:02] | No, you’ve never seen me see her. | 不 是你没看到我见过莉迪亚 |
| [15:05] | Lydia is nothing like my mother. | 莉迪亚和我妈完全不像 |
| [15:07] | Why would I get involved with a woman | 我干嘛要跟那个长的跟生我的怪物 |
| [15:10] | who even slightly resembles the monster who bore me? | 有点像的女人搞在一起? |
| [15:11] | Oh, are you going to love this book. | 你一定会喜欢这本书的 |
| [15:17] | Here. | 给你 |
| [15:18] | Mom wants to talk to you. | 妈想跟你讲话 |
| [15:20] | Oh, great. | 哦 太好了 |
| [15:22] | Hi, Mom. | 嗨 妈 |
| [15:23] | Oh, Lydia. | 哦 莉迪亚 |
| [15:25] | Very funny. | 很好笑 |
| [15:27] | I thought so. | 我也这么认为 |
| [15:28] | I liked it. | 我喜欢 |
| [15:30] | So what’s up? | 有什么事? |
| [15:32] | Are you still coming over tomorrow? | 你明天还是会来吗? |
| [15:33] | I thought your ex had the kids. | 我以为你前夫会顾小孩 |
| [15:36] | Okay, well, why don’t you bring them over? | 好吧 不然你把小孩带来如何? |
| [15:40] | Oh, please, how could I possibly embarrass you? | 拜托 我怎么可能会让你出糗? |
| [15:43] | No, no, no, no, no, no, I only do that when I’m drunk. | 不 不 不… 我只有喝醉时才会这样 |
| [15:48] | Look, I swear, I’ll be on my best behavior. | 听着 我发誓 我会表现出最好的一面的 |
| [15:52] | Great. I’ll see you then, Mom… | 太好了 那到时见 妈… |
| [15:55] | of the year! | 年度最佳母亲 |
| [15:57] | Well, in my book you are. | 在我的书里你是 |
| [16:01] | One word, and everybody gets their eyes poked out. | 谁敢再讲一句 我就把所有人的眼睛刺瞎 |
| [16:08] | Why do I have to play with kids I don’t know? | 为什么我要跟不认识的小孩子玩? |
| [16:11] | Because Lydia’s bringing them over, | 因为莉迪亚要带他们来 |
| [16:13] | and I didn’t have time to rent a clown. | 而且我没时间去租一个小丑 |
| [16:16] | Are they boys or girls? | 他们是男生还女生? |
| [16:18] | Beats me. | 问倒我了 |
| [16:20] | How old are they? | 他们多大? |
| [16:21] | Not a clue. | 不知道 |
| [16:23] | Sounds like fun. | 听起来很有趣 |
| [16:25] | Hey, they’re kids, you’re a kid. | 嘿 他们是小孩 你也是小孩 |
| [16:27] | How tough could it be? | 这样会有多难? |
| [16:28] | I mean, we’re not breeding pandas here. | 又不是在繁殖熊猫 |
| [16:32] | All right, but if they’re boys, | 好啦 不过如果他们是男生 |
| [16:34] | just don’t call them “little dudes,” okay? | 千万别叫他们”小兄弟” 知道吗? |
| [16:36] | Why not? | 为什么? |
| [16:37] | There was this guy Mom used to date, | 之前有个和妈约会的人 |
| [16:39] | and every time he’d see me, he’d call me “little dude.” | 每次一见到我 就叫我 “小兄弟” |
| [16:42] | He was an idiot. | 他真是个白痴 |
| [16:44] | Okay, okay, that’s good stuff. | 好 好 说的很好 |
| [16:47] | What else you got? | 还有什么要注意的? |
| [16:48] | No lame magic tricks, no head rubbing, | 不要耍些无聊的魔术 不要摸人家头 |
| [16:50] | and please, no high fives. | 而且拜托 不要击掌 |
| [16:51] | Got it. | 了解 |
| [16:53] | And don’t ask, “Who wants ice cream?” | 而且别问 “谁要吃冰淇淋?” |
| [16:55] | Everybody wants ice cream. | 大家都想吃冰淇淋 |
| [16:57] | I understand. | 我了解 |
| [16:58] | Even lactose-intolerant kids want ice cream. | 就算有乳糖不耐症的小孩 也想吃冰淇淋 |
| [17:01] | Makes sense. | 有道理 |
| [17:02] | But whatever you do, don’t try to pretend you’re | 不过不管你做什么 |
| [17:03] | not sleeping with their mom. We’re not stupid. | 千万别假装你没有和他妈上床 我们不是笨蛋 |
| [17:07] | So if I do this stuff, her kids will like me? | 所以如果我照你说的做 她的小孩就会喜欢我? |
| [17:10] | No. Why not? | -不会 -为什么? |
| [17:12] | You’re doing their mom. | 因为你干了他妈 |
| [17:20] | Hello, Lydia. | 哈啰 莉迪亚 |
| [17:22] | Hey, little dudes, give me five. | 嗨 小兄弟 击掌 |
| [17:27] | All right. | 对啦 |
| [17:28] | That’s what I’m talking about. | 这样才是我的好兄弟 |
| [17:30] | Don’t worry, he’s not the one I’m dating. | 别担心 跟我约会的不是他 |
| [17:35] | There they are. Welcome. | 你们来了 欢迎 |
| [17:37] | Hello, Charlie. | 哈啰 查理 |
| [17:38] | These are my sons, Andy and Joey. | 这是我儿子 安迪与乔伊 |
| [17:40] | Nice to meet you guys. | 很高兴见到你们 |
| [17:41] | Wrong. | 错了 |
| [17:46] | Shake hands with him, darlings. | 和他握个手吧 亲爱的 |
| [17:50] | Not like that. | 不是这样 |
| [17:51] | -Shake hands like a man. -I am! | -要像个男子汉 -我有 |
| [17:54] | Do you always have to embarrass me? | 你一定要让我难堪吗? |
| [17:58] | What are you laughing at? | 你在笑什么? |
| [17:59] | You’re no prize, either. | 你也没奖品了 |
| [18:12] | What? | 怎么了? |
| [18:13] | Nothing. | 没事 |
| [18:15] | Excuse me. | 失陪一下 |
| [18:43] | Hey, who wants ice cream? | 嘿 谁想吃冰淇淋? |
| [18:53] | Sorbet, not ice cream. | 吃冰沙 别吃冰淇淋 |
| [18:54] | You don’t want to turn into a big tub of goo like your father. | 你们不会想变的和你老爸一样肥胖 |
| [18:58] | And those are expensive new shirts. | 还有 那些新衬衫很贵 |
| [19:00] | If you stain them, don’t even bother coming back. | 如果弄脏了 就别想回来了 |
| [19:11] | What now? | 现在是怎样? |
| [19:13] | Oh. Nothing, nothing. | 哦 没事 没事 |
| [19:15] | I was just thinking about mothers | 我只是想到了母亲们 |
| [19:17] | and kids and crying. | 孩子们和哭叫 |
| [19:22] | So much crying. | 一堆都在哭叫 |
| [19:26] | Well, what do you think of my boys? | 你觉得我的小孩如何? |
| [19:28] | Oh, they’re-they’re terrific. | 他们…他们很了不起 |
| [19:30] | And the way you interact with them is so… unbelievable. | 而且你和他们之间的互动 真是…令人惊奇 |
| [19:35] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [19:36] | The older one has a chance. | 比较大的那个还有希望 |
| [19:38] | The younger one, I’m afraid, is a lost cause. | 比较小的那个 我觉得恐怕没救了 |
| [19:42] | Anyway, | 不管了 |
| [19:44] | we have the house to ourselves. | 房子里只有我们俩 |
| [19:46] | Do you feel like going upstairs? | 你想上楼吗? |
| [19:48] | Uh, yeah, that’s a, uh, interesting idea. | 呃…那是一个…呃 很有趣的主意 |
| [19:53] | What’s the matter, Charlie? | 你怎么了 查理? |
| [19:55] | It’s kind of hard to explain. | 有点难解释 |
| [19:57] | Well, why don’t we go get naked | 不如我们脱光衣服 |
| [20:00] | and see if that loosens your tongue? | 然后再看看你能不能解释? |
| [20:06] | I got my nails done. | 我有修过指甲了 |
| [20:14] | Oh, why not? | 哦 有什么关系? |
| [20:15] | I’m going to hell, anyway. | 反正我迟早会下地狱 |