时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:04] | No… No, Charlie. | 别 别这样 查理 |
[00:08] | It’s mine. | 这是我的玩具 |
[00:10] | What? | 嘟囔啥呢 |
[00:11] | Give it back. | 还给我 |
[00:14] | Mom! Charlie hit me! | 妈 查理打我 |
[00:17] | Oh, okay. | 好吧 |
[00:20] | Consuela, Charlie hit me. | 康丝薇拉 查理打我 |
[00:24] | Mom, Consuela hit me. | 妈 康丝薇拉她打我 |
[00:27] | God. Here we go again. | 神啊 又来了 |
[00:30] | I’ll run away, then you’ll be sorry. | 我要离家出走 到时候你就知错了 |
[00:34] | Mom, Charlie’s making me hit myself. | 妈 查理让我自己打自己 |
[00:40] | Hey. What are you doing up? | 你怎么起来了 |
[00:41] | Your brother’s talking in his sleep again. | 你的弟弟又在说梦话了 |
[00:44] | No kidding. what about? | 不是吧 说的啥 |
[00:45] | Some childhood dream about you making him hit himself. | 某个关于童年的恶梦 关于你让他自己打自己的事 |
[00:48] | What childhood? That was last week. | 什么狗屁童年 明明就是上周 |
[00:52] | Sports Center? | 你在看《体育中心》 |
[00:53] | Yeah. I’m making my picks for tomorrow’s games. | 对 为明天的比赛做下注的准备 |
[00:56] | Really, Charlie? | 你来真的吗 查理 |
[00:58] | Taking the points against Georgetown? | 你居然把钱压在乔治城大学的对手上 |
[01:00] | No. | 不是 |
[01:01] | If you want to throw your money away, | 如果你想把钱都散个精光 |
[01:03] | why don’t you just get married without a prenup. | 何不来一段没有婚前协议的婚姻 |
[01:06] | You know something I don’t? | 你知道什么事是我不做的吗 |
[01:09] | So far this year, Georgetown’s covered the spread | 就今年而言 乔治城大学十场有八场 |
[01:11] | eight times out of ten. | 都能保住盘口 |
[01:12] | Wow, you bet college basketball? | 你也在大学篮球赛下注了 |
[01:15] | Only idiots bet college basketball. | 只有傻子才会把钱花在这上 |
[01:18] | No offense. | 无心冒犯 |
[01:19] | Then how do you know all this stuff? | 那你怎么会了解这么多东西呢 |
[01:21] | I worked for a sports book in Vegas. | 我之前在维加斯一家体育书店那工作 |
[01:23] | Then I opened my own little business | 后来在雪曼橡树区搞了家蜡烛店 |
[01:24] | in the back of a candle shop in Sherman Oaks. | 做起了自己的生意 |
[01:26] | I always wondered how those places stayed in business. | 我一直都觉得奇怪 这些小店是怎么维持经营不倒闭的 |
[01:29] | Yeah, so did the IRS. | 就是 国税局也觉得奇怪 |
[01:33] | So they nailed you for running a book? | 所以你之所以被税务局抓 是因为走私书吗 |
[01:35] | No. They nailed me for running a candle store | 错 他们抓我是因为我那家蜡烛店 |
[01:37] | that made a quarter of a million dollars a year | 一年赚25万美元 |
[01:38] | without selling one freakin’ candle. | 却没卖出过半根蜡烛 |
[01:43] | Okay, so no on Georgetown. | 好的 那就不把注下在乔治城大学 |
[01:45] | Does Alan know about this? | 艾伦知道这事吗 |
[01:48] | He knows about the candle store. | 他只知道我开过蜡烛店 |
[01:49] | Let’s just keep the other part between us. | 至于别的部分 天知地知 你知我知 |
[01:51] | Yeah, he’s kind of prissy about moral stuff like gambling. | 也是 像赌博这种道德上的事情 他有点神经质 |
[01:55] | Yeah, he is. | 对 就是 |
[01:56] | And drinking. | 以及酗酒 |
[01:57] | Well, that’s only because when he drinks, | 那是因为当他喝醉的时候 |
[01:59] | he gets all weepy and then he pukes. | 他不但大哭大闹 还狂吐不止 |
[02:01] | And whoring. | 还有嫖妓 |
[02:02] | No, he doesn’t have a moral problem with that. | 错 在这方面其实他没啥道德观 |
[02:04] | He’s just cheap and he likes to cuddle. | 只是不舍得花钱又喜欢温存 |
[02:07] | Well, don’t worry– your sordid gambling past will be our secret. | 不用担心 我会为你堕落好赌的过去保密的 |
[02:11] | I’m glad to know I can trust you. | 很高兴我能信任你 |
[02:12] | Well, of course you can. | 你完全可以信任我 |
[02:13] | Hey, I never told him about your little soft-core film career. | 我从来没告诉他 你过去拍过三级片 |
[02:16] | Oh, God. | 天啊 |
[02:18] | You saw Cinnamon’s Buns? | 你看过《肉桂小香臀》这部电影 |
[02:20] | Not all the way through. | 也没全看完 |
[02:26] | Although I am very familiar with | 虽然我对中间那场面包房的戏 |
[02:28] | the bakery shop scene in the middle. | 烂熟于心 |
[02:31] | You know, with the frosting gun? | 你还记得吗 有喷霜糖的枪 |
[02:33] | I was 19, I needed the money. | 当时我才19岁 急需用钱 |
[02:36] | They promised me it would be tasteful. | 他们向我保证 那些霜糖会很好吃 |
[02:38] | It looked very tasteful. | 看起来的确很好吃 |
[02:40] | And delicious. | 美味得不得了 |
[02:42] | Yum, yum. | 让人性欲大增 |
[02:45] | Glad to hear you enjoyed it. | 很高兴你能喜欢 |
[02:47] | Oh, yeah. Although I don’t think you were well-served | 没错 虽然我觉得电影剧本的情节 |
[02:49] | by the screenplay. | 没有充分满足你 |
[02:50] | What screenplay? | 这算哪门子电影剧本 |
[02:51] | There was just a greasy little guy behind the camera | 不过是一个谄媚的小人躲在摄影机后面 |
[02:53] | saying, “Do this, do that. More frosting.” | 大声嚷嚷说”干这个 干那个 再来点霜糖” |
[02:56] | It’s kind of weird. In some way, | 这感觉真奇怪 在某种程度上来说 |
[02:59] | you and I have more in common than you and my brother. | 我和你比你和我弟弟 还有更多的共同语言 |
[03:02] | All right, let’s take something off the table right away. | 好吧 咱们就坦诚点 敞开了说吧 |
[03:06] | – What’s that? – My ass. | -先敞哪里 -我屁股 |
[03:08] | That’s not what I was getting at… | 我可没有这么想 |
[03:10] | Seriously, Charlie, in spite of my past, | 说真的 查理 先把我的过去抛开 |
[03:12] | I’m just a nice little Valley soccer mom now. | 我只是一个足球运动员的善良妈妈 |
[03:14] | Whoa, whoa, whoa, soccer mom? | 慢着 慢着 足球运动员 |
[03:17] | Your kid’s a babbling pothead. | 你的儿子明明就是个胡言乱语的瘾君子 |
[03:19] | He played soccer when he was ten. | 他10岁的时候踢过足球 |
[03:21] | He scored two goals. | 而且还进过两球呢 |
[03:22] | In one game? | 在一次比赛上 |
[03:23] | In one season. Shut up. | 在整个赛季里 不过你闭嘴 |
[03:24] | The point is, | 重点是 |
[03:26] | I am way past guys like you. | 我早就对像你这样的家伙不感冒了 |
[03:28] | What do you mean guys like me? | 你说的”像我这样的家伙”是指 |
[03:30] | I mean guys that I have to dip in ammonia | 是指那些被我杀了灭口泡在氨水里 |
[03:32] | before I’d let them anywhere near me. | 以免他们死缠烂打不放手的臭男人 |
[03:34] | Oh. Those guys. | 哦 那些家伙啊 |
[03:37] | Well, as long as we’re being honest, | 既然咱们这么坦诚 |
[03:39] | I’m perfectly happy with the way things are between us. | 我对于咱俩的目前的关系 非常非常满意 |
[03:41] | Besides, you’re really good for Alan. | 再说了 你真的很适合艾伦 |
[03:44] | – Thank you. – Yeah, yeah, no, | -谢谢 -真心话 不用客气 |
[03:45] | y-you’re, you’re smart, you’re strong, | 你 你聪明 坚强 |
[03:48] | you’re self-sufficient, and he’s, well… not. | 自立 而他呢 恰恰与你相反 |
[03:52] | I think you underestimate your brother. | 我觉得你低估你弟弟了 |
[03:54] | It’s not an estimate. I already got the bill. | 这不是估计 这是亲身体会得出的总结 |
[03:56] | You’ll see, one of these days he’s gonna surprise you. | 你等着瞧 总有一天 他会让你大吃一惊的 |
[03:59] | And one of these days I’m gonna die of liver failure. | 总有一天 我会死于肝脏衰竭 |
[04:02] | Want to lay odds which happens first? | 有兴趣下注 赌哪个会先发生吗 |
[04:05] | – Good night, Charlie. – Good night. | -晚安 查理 -晚安 |
[04:09] | Ammonia? | 氨水 |
[04:11] | Am I that skeevy? | 我有这么让人讨厌吗 |
[04:13] | Yes. | 你有 |
[04:45] | – Morning. – Morning. | -早安 -早安 |
[04:46] | Did Lyndsey leave yet? | 琳赛走了吗 |
[04:48] | No. Why? | 没有 怎么了 |
[04:49] | No reason. Just trying to keep track of who’s in my house. | 没事 就是想知道都有谁在我家 |
[04:53] | Don’t worry, she’s leaving very soon. | 别担心 她马上就走 |
[04:55] | I’m not worried. | 我没担心 |
[04:56] | Actually, I like having her around. | 其实 我挺喜欢她住这里的 |
[04:58] | You not so much. | 那你就算了吧 |
[05:00] | Thank you. | 谢谢啊 |
[05:02] | That never ceases to be funny. | 这个笑料从来都不好笑 |
[05:03] | Ah, cinnamon buns! | 肉桂小面包 |
[05:12] | How did you know? | 你怎么知道的 |
[05:13] | I bought them. | 我买的呀 |
[05:14] | Oh, right, cinnamon buns. | 对 肉桂小面包嘛 |
[05:16] | Who doesn’t love cinnamon buns? | 谁不爱肉桂小面包呢 |
[05:18] | Charlie! | 查理 |
[05:19] | What, what, what? | 干嘛 干嘛 |
[05:21] | Alan bought cinnamon buns. | 艾伦买了肉桂小面包 |
[05:22] | With frosting. | 上面还有霜糖哦 |
[05:28] | Yum. | 好好吃哦 |
[05:32] | All right, honey. | 好了 亲爱的 |
[05:33] | I’ll see you later. | 晚点见 |
[05:34] | I’ll call you after work. | 下班之后给你电话 |
[05:36] | See ya, Charlie. | 回见 查理 |
[05:37] | Hey, Lynds, has your son picked a college yet? | 琳赛 你的儿子选大学了吗 |
[05:39] | Uh, no. Why? | 没有 为什么这么问 |
[05:41] | Well, I was just wondering | 我只是好奇 |
[05:43] | if he were to choose between say… | 如果他在北卡罗来纳州大学 |
[05:47] | North Carolina and Kentucky… | 和肯塔基州大学二者中选择 |
[05:51] | …which one would you encourage him to pick? | 你会鼓励他挑哪所呢 |
[05:53] | Keeping in mind that as an out-of-state resident, | 要记住 要以一个外洲旁观居民的眼光来选 |
[05:55] | Kentucky is two-and-a-half times more expensive. | 两者相比 肯塔基州大学要贵2.5倍哦 |
[05:58] | I’d still go with Kentucky. It’s a better school. | 我还是坚持肯塔基州大学 这所学校比较好 |
[06:02] | Interesting. | 有趣的选择 |
[06:03] | Well, I hope he gets in. | 我希望他能考上 |
[06:06] | Thanks. Bye. | 多谢关心 走啦 |
[06:07] | Bye. | 再见 |
[06:09] | What was that all about? | 你们刚是在干嘛 |
[06:12] | Since when do you care about her kid’s education? | 你打从什么时候开始 关心起她儿子的教育问题 |
[06:14] | Young people are our future, Alan. | 青少年是祖国的未来 艾伦 |
[06:16] | I care about them all. | 我关心所有的青少年 |
[06:17] | Oh, please. The only young people you care about | 拜托 你唯一关心的青少年 |
[06:20] | are sliding down a pole to grab dollar bills out of your mouth. | 为了拿你嘴里的一美元的钞票 正从钢管上滑下来呢 |
[06:24] | Those aren’t dollar bills– those are 20s. | 哥可没那么抠门 哥叼着的是20美元 |
[06:28] | And when did you become such a cynic? | 你什么时候变得这么冷嘲热讽 |
[06:30] | And when did you become so interested | 你什么时候对我女朋友的来去 |
[06:31] | in the comings and goings of my girlfriend– | 和她儿子的将来 |
[06:33] | or what her kid’s up to? | 变得这么感兴趣 |
[06:34] | Whoa, whoa, chill. | 哇 冷静点 |
[06:36] | No, no, I will not chill. | 不 不 我冷静不下来 |
[06:37] | And what was all that about liking having her around? | 什么叫”挺喜欢她住这里” |
[06:39] | Nothing. I like having her around. | 没什么 我就是挺喜欢她住这里的 |
[06:41] | Yeah, but around what? | 是啊 这里是哪里呢 |
[06:43] | Excuse me? | 什么意思 |
[06:44] | I think when you say “around,” you mean under. | 我觉得你说的”这里”是指你的下面 |
[06:48] | Don’t go down that road, Alan. | 艾伦 你不要胡思乱想 |
[06:50] | Oh, oh, why shouldn’t I go down that road? | 为什么我不能胡思乱想呢 |
[06:52] | Is it slippery when wet? | 当你们激情的时候 她里面是不是很滑啊 |
[06:54] | Are you out of your mind? What’s gotten into you? | 你疯了啊 你到底在想什么呢 |
[06:57] | Oh, I think a better question would be what’s gotten into you? | 我想到有一个更好的问题问你 |
[07:00] | I mean, who have you gotten into? | 你到底上了谁 |
[07:02] | Alan, Alan, listen to me very carefully. | 艾伦 艾伦 仔细听我说 |
[07:05] | I have not had sex with your girlfriend. | 我没有跟你的女朋友上床 |
[07:07] | Oh, so it’s still in the planning stages. | 那这么说来 还在预谋阶段咯 |
[07:08] | – No. – But you do want her? | -错 -但你的确想上她 |
[07:10] | – No. – Why not? What’s wrong with her? | 没有 -为什么没有 她有什么不好的 |
[07:13] | Nothing. She’s terrific. | 没有啊 她人很好 |
[07:14] | So you do want her! | 所以你确实想上她 |
[07:16] | Alan, believe me, when it comes to Lyndsey, | 艾伦 相信我 你完全不需要担心 |
[07:18] | you have absolutely nothing to worry about. | 我跟琳赛会发生什么事情 |
[07:20] | Uh-huh, uh-huh. That’s what you said about Wendy Freidman | 是啊 当年你也是这么说你跟温迪·弗莱德曼 |
[07:23] | and Kathy Bell and Amy Driskell. | 凯西·贝尔还有跟艾米·得利斯凯的关系的 |
[07:25] | Who? | 都谁啊 |
[07:26] | They’re all girls that you stole from me. | 她们都是你从我那里拐走的女孩 |
[07:28] | What are you talking about? | 你这是什么意思 |
[07:29] | I never stole anybody from you. | 我从来都没从你身边拐走过任何人 |
[07:30] | Wendy Freidman. | 温迪·弗莱德曼 |
[07:32] | Sixth grade, Halloween party. | 六年级时的万圣节派对 |
[07:33] | I went to get her punch. When I came back, | 我去帮她拿杯调酒 回来就看到 |
[07:35] | you were bobbling for her apples. | 你想把头栽到她胸部上 |
[07:36] | Innocent fun. | 年少无知嘛 |
[07:39] | Oh… Kathy Bell, ninth grade. | 凯西·贝尔 九年级时 |
[07:41] | I brought her home to work on our science project. | 我把她带回家做我们的科学报告 |
[07:42] | I went to the bathroom. | 我才去了下厕所 |
[07:43] | When I came back, you were teaching her French. | 一回来就看到你在教她法式热吻 |
[07:45] | Harmless horseplay. | 只是随便玩玩嘛 |
[07:48] | Amy Driskell, sophomore year. | 艾米·得利斯凯 大二那年 |
[07:50] | First girl who let me get to second base. | 第一个愿意让我上二垒到女孩 |
[07:52] | All right, her I nailed. | 好吧 我上了她 |
[07:53] | Wait, wait, wait. You nailed her? | 等等 等等 你上了她吗 |
[07:56] | Everybody nailed her. That was her thing. | 每个人都上过她啊 她是破鞋界一霸 |
[07:59] | It took me six months | 我花了六个月 |
[08:01] | just to touch her right boob! | 才终于摸到她右咪咪 |
[08:02] | Wow, you really missed the signals, didn’t you? | 哇 你完全没搞懂她的暗示 对吧 |
[08:05] | What signals? | 什么暗示 |
[08:06] | Well, in my case, | 在她跟我好上那会 |
[08:07] | it was her taking off her sweater | 是她自己脱掉了上衣 |
[08:08] | and saying, “quick, do me before Alan gets back | 然后说 快在艾伦上完喇叭课回家前 |
[08:10] | from his trumpet lesson.” | 把我上了 |
[08:16] | Clarinet. I didn’t have the lip for trumpet. | 竖笛 我的嘴唇不够格吹喇叭 |
[08:19] | Apparently, you didn’t have the lip for Amy Driskell, either. | 显然 你也不够格吹艾米·得利斯凯 |
[08:23] | But all that was a long time ago. | 但是那些都是几百年前的事了 |
[08:25] | You’re with Lyndsey now, and what’s important | 你现在是跟琳赛在一起 最重要的是 |
[08:27] | is that I wish you both a long and happy life together. | 我真心希望你们两个能长长久久 白头偕老 |
[08:30] | – Really? – From the bottom of my heart. | -真的吗 -我打从我心底祝福你们 |
[08:32] | Okay. | 好吧 |
[08:35] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[08:36] | You’re welcome. | 不客气 |
[08:40] | Though I’d still like you to move out. | 不过我还是想你搬离这里 |
[08:42] | Got it. | 知道 |
[08:46] | Soon. | 越快越好 |
[08:48] | Right. | 好的 |
[08:52] | No, I guess that’s about it. | 没了 想说的都说了 |
[08:57] | Amy Driskell. | 艾米·得利斯凯 |
[08:58] | “No, Alan, I’m saving myself for Jesus.” | 别 艾伦 我在为上帝守贞 |
[09:06] | Come on in. | 进来吧 |
[09:09] | Wow, the place looks great. | 这地方看起来美极了 |
[09:12] | Doesn’t it? | 没错吧 |
[09:14] | Even better than before I accidentally | 甚至比我意外的 |
[09:16] | almost burned it to the ground. | 烧掉这房子之前还美 |
[09:19] | Yeah. | 是的 |
[09:21] | You’re welcome. | 不用谢我 |
[09:22] | Come here. | 过来 |
[09:24] | I want to give you something. | 我想给你个东西 |
[09:26] | Oh. Fooling around? | 亲热吗 |
[09:27] | On the new couch? | 在这新沙发上吗 |
[09:28] | Get your mind out of the gutter. | 把你下流无耻的想法给我放一边 |
[09:30] | I haven’t Scotchgarded yet. | 我还没涂上防水剂呢 |
[09:33] | Here. | 给 |
[09:34] | A house key? | 房子钥匙 |
[09:35] | – Uh-huh. – For this house? | -是啊 -这房子的吗 |
[09:38] | Maybe we’re not ready to move in together, | 或许我们还没准备好同居 |
[09:40] | but I want you to feel like you can come and go | 但是我想让你知道 你可以自由进出 |
[09:42] | without checking in with me. | 不用总是先问我 |
[09:43] | Wow. Wow. Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[09:46] | In a lot of ways, this isn’t just the key to your house, | 某些方面来说 这不只是你房子的钥匙 |
[09:49] | it’s the key to your heart. | 这还是你心房的钥匙 |
[09:51] | Don’t gay it up. | 别把气氛搞娘了 |
[09:56] | Now listen, I’m thinking of having | 听我说 我想下周六 |
[09:58] | a housewarming party next Saturday. | 来办一个乔迁派对 |
[09:59] | Great. What can I do? | 好主意 我有什么能帮忙的 |
[10:01] | You can help me with the guest list. | 你可以帮我拟定来宾名单 |
[10:02] | Okay. | 好的 |
[10:03] | What would you say about inviting | 你觉得邀请 |
[10:05] | – Judith and Herb? – My ex-wife? | -朱蒂丝还有赫伯如何 -我的前妻吗 |
[10:07] | They live right across the street, | 他们就住附近 |
[10:08] | and Herb is always so sweet to me. | 赫伯也总是对我很和善 |
[10:09] | That’s because every time Herb looks at you, | 那是因为每次赫伯看到你时 |
[10:11] | he’s pretending you’re wet and naked. | 脑海里想象的是你湿身还赤裸着 |
[10:13] | All right. Fine. I won’t invite him. | 好吧 我不邀请他 |
[10:15] | It would probably just upset Judith anyway. | 那样大概会让朱蒂丝不太高兴 |
[10:17] | Yeah, you’re right. | 是啊 有道理 |
[10:18] | You know what? Let’s invite them. | 这样吧 还是邀请他们吧 |
[10:21] | Take the high road. | 表现的有容乃大 |
[10:23] | All right. What about Berta? | 好吧 波塔呢 |
[10:25] | Oh, no. I don’t think so. | 不要 不好吧 |
[10:26] | – Why not? – She’s kind of mean to me. | -为什么不要呢 -她对我不太友善 |
[10:28] | Oh, honey. | 宝贝啊 |
[10:30] | That’s just ’cause she doesn’t like you. | 那只是因为她压根就不喜欢你 |
[10:32] | Fine. Berta. | 好吧 邀请她来 |
[10:34] | And Jake. | 还有杰克 |
[10:35] | – Oh, of course. Great. – And Charlie. | -当然 没问题 -还有查理 |
[10:38] | There it is. | 我就知道 |
[10:39] | There what is? | 知道个什么东西 |
[10:40] | Charlie. Why do you want Charlie | 查理 为什么你要邀请查理 |
[10:42] | to come to your party? | 来你的派对 |
[10:43] | Why wouldn’t I? When this place burned down, | 为什么不会 当我们的无家可归时 |
[10:44] | he took us in. | 他收留了我们 |
[10:46] | He took me in seven years ago, | 他七年前就收留了我 |
[10:47] | and I don’t feel a need to invite him. | 我也没觉得需要邀请他啊 |
[10:49] | Oh, come on. | 拜托哦 |
[10:51] | He’s a great guy. I really like him. | 他是个好人 我很喜欢他 |
[10:53] | Of course you do. All the women like Charlie. | 你当然喜欢他 所有女人都喜欢查理 |
[10:55] | “All the women”? | 所有女人? |
[10:56] | Wendy Freidman, | 温迪·弗莱德曼 |
[10:57] | Kathy Bell, | 凯西·贝尔 |
[10:58] | Amy Driskell. | 艾米·得利斯凯 |
[10:59] | Who? | 谁啊 |
[11:00] | And now Lyndsey MacElroy. | 现在轮到琳赛·麦克洛伊 |
[11:02] | Oh, please. | 别这样 |
[11:03] | Charlie and I are just friends. | 查理跟我只是朋友关系 |
[11:04] | Oh, no, no, no, my brother does not be friend women, | 不 不 不 我哥哥从来不跟女人当朋友 |
[11:07] | he befouls them. | 他只玷污她们 |
[11:08] | Are you saying you don’t trust me? | 你的意思是说你不信任我吗 |
[11:11] | Oh, no, no, no, I don’t trust Charlie. | 不 不 不 我不信任查理 |
[11:13] | For him, you’re unexplored territory. | 对他来说 你就是无人踏足过的处女地 |
[11:14] | At some point, he’s gonna try and plant his flag in you. | 只要一有机会 他就会来你身上插旗 |
[11:18] | And when I say “Flag,” I mean his… | 当然 我说的旗子是指他的… |
[11:22] | …flag. | 胯下小旗 |
[11:24] | Okay, you’re out of your mind. | 够了 你简直就是个疯子了 |
[11:27] | Yeah, well, be that as it may, | 我真是疯了又如何 |
[11:28] | I do not want you hanging out with my brother. | 反正我就是不想你跟我哥哥混在一起 |
[11:30] | I mean, you know, you can be courteous to him. | 你是可以对他说些场面话 |
[11:32] | You know, like, “Hey, Charlie, | 例如说 查理 |
[11:33] | you got some vomit on your shoe”, | 你的鞋子上沾到了呕吐物 |
[11:35] | or, you know, “Hey, Charlie, do you need me to move my car | 或者是 查理 你需要我去移动我的车吗 |
[11:37] | so your hooker can park her pink Camaro?” | 所以你找的妓女才有位置停她的粉色卡梅洛 |
[11:40] | Do you realize how insulting this is? | 你知道你这么说对我是多大的侮辱吗 |
[11:42] | You don’t get to tell me who I can and can’t be friends with. | 我要跟谁做朋友还轮不到你来指手画脚 |
[11:45] | Hey, it’s just Charlie. I gave you Herb and Berta. | 只是查理而已 我让你邀请了赫伯跟波塔呢 |
[11:47] | You know what, I made a mistake. | 你知道吗 我犯了个大错 |
[11:50] | Well, I forgive you. | 我原谅你 |
[11:52] | Give me my key back. | 把我的钥匙还我 |
[11:54] | – What? – Give it to me. | -什么 -还我 |
[11:56] | Then how can I come and go? | 那我怎么能自由来去 |
[11:57] | You can forget coming, you’re just gonna be going. | 别想来了 你只剩下走的权利 |
[12:00] | But I-I don’t understand. | 我不懂啊 |
[12:01] | We were doing so good. | 我们刚才不是进展的不错嘛 |
[12:02] | We were, then you started talking and spoiled it. | 是啊 可是你讨人厌的嘴毁了一切 |
[12:05] | Okay, okay, ju-just to clarify– | 好吧 好吧 我想确认一下 |
[12:07] | you’re not as angry with me now | 跟我烧掉你房子比 |
[12:09] | as you were when I burned down your house? | 你现在气我气的少点对吧 |
[12:13] | Okay, we’ll talk after you’ve gained some perspective. | 等你有点判断力之后我们再来谈吧 |
[12:25] | Jake, Berta, let’s go! | 杰克 波塔 走吧 |
[12:26] | Party train’s leaving. | 开向派对的火车要出发了 |
[12:29] | That’s what you’re wearing to Lyndsey’s housewarming? | 你要穿这样去琳赛的乔迁派对吗 |
[12:31] | I’m not going. | 我不去了 |
[12:32] | Why not? | 为什么不去 |
[12:33] | She and I had a little argument. | 我们俩起了点争执 |
[12:35] | Aw, that’s too bad. | 真是太遗憾了 |
[12:36] | Jake, Berta, let’s go! | 杰克 波塔 走啦 |
[12:38] | Charlie. | 查理 |
[12:41] | If you do what I think | 你要是干了 |
[12:42] | you’re gonna do, I swear to God | 我想你会做的事情 我对天发誓 |
[12:44] | I will never speak to you again. | 我今生再也不会对你说话 |
[12:45] | Oh, really? | 真的吗 |
[12:47] | Then by all means, tell me exactly | 那你赶快告诉我 |
[12:48] | what you think I’m gonna do. | 你心中想着我会做的是什么事 |
[12:50] | You know what I’m talking about. | 你知道我是什么意思 |
[12:52] | All right, all right, | 好吧 好吧 |
[12:53] | I’m gonna run this down for you one last time. | 我再跟你重申最后一次 |
[12:56] | I have no interest in Lyndsey other than as a friend, | 我对琳赛只有朋友的感觉 别无二心 |
[12:58] | and she has even less interest in me. | 而她对我更是一点别的心思都没有 |
[13:00] | I don’t believe you. | 我才不信你 |
[13:01] | Okay, fine, you’re right. | 好吧好吧 你说得对 |
[13:02] | I’m going over to your girlfriend’s house, | 我现在要去你女朋友家 |
[13:03] | and I’m gonna do her right on the couch! | 然后在她家的沙发上跟她翻云覆雨 |
[13:05] | – No, you won’t. – Why not? | -不 你不会 -为什么 |
[13:07] | Couch isn’t Scotchgarded yet. | 沙发还没涂上防水剂 |
[13:11] | Hey, Charlie, did you remember to get the housewarming gift? | 查理 你没忘了拿乔迁派对的礼物吧 |
[13:13] | Jake’s got it. Jake! | 在杰克那呢 杰克 |
[13:21] | Very funny. | 真好笑 |
[13:22] | We thought so. | 我们也这么想 |
[13:24] | How come you aren’t dressed? | 你怎么还没换衣服 |
[13:26] | He and Lyndsey had a fight. | 他跟琳赛吵架了 |
[13:27] | Oh. That sucks. | 真惨 |
[13:28] | See ya. | 回见 |
[13:31] | So you’re just gonna | 那你今晚就准备 |
[13:32] | sit here all night? | 一直坐在这了吗 |
[13:33] | Oh, I’ll be fine. | 别担心 我没事的 |
[13:34] | Oh, I’m sure you will. | 我知道你没事 |
[13:36] | But if you get bored, | 不过你要是闷了 |
[13:37] | there’s a load of laundry in the dryer | 烘干机里正好有一堆洗好的衣服 |
[13:39] | you could fluff and fold. | 你可以拿出来抖抖然后叠好 |
[13:40] | So you want me to do your job? | 你想让我帮你干活就对了 |
[13:43] | Somebody has to. | 总得有人干呀 |
[13:46] | Well, I guess there’s nothing | 看来我没什么好交代的了 |
[13:48] | left to say except you’re an idiot. | 只能说 你是个蠢货 |
[13:54] | I may be an idiot, but at least I’m home by myself | 就算我蠢吧 至少我能自己在家 |
[13:57] | reading Moby Dick. | 看《白鲸记》 |
[14:00] | Upside down. | 书还拿反了 |
[14:08] | Might as well. | 这样也不错 |
[14:12] | Maybe she’ll like me better. | 没准这样她能更喜欢我呢 |
[14:18] | Where’s your friend Eldridge? | 你朋友艾尔德里奇呢 |
[14:19] | He lives here, right? | 这是他家 对吧 |
[14:20] | Yeah, he’s hiding in his room. | 没错 他正躲在自己屋里呢 |
[14:22] | How come? | 为什么 |
[14:23] | He gets really paranoid when he’s high… | 他磕完药以后比较疑神疑鬼 |
[14:25] | …ding in his room. | 我是说他躲在屋里比较疑神疑鬼 |
[14:27] | I just came to get him these snacks. Bye. | 我去给他送吃的 再见 |
[14:29] | Amateurs. | 小娃娃 |
[14:33] | Nice party. | 派对办的不错 |
[14:35] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
[14:35] | So give me the lay of the land. | 给我介绍一下来宾吧 |
[14:37] | You mean who in this land can you lay? | 你是想看看有哪些潜在目标吧 |
[14:39] | If you will. | 这么理解也行 |
[14:41] | All right. | 好吧 |
[14:43] | Hot redhead by the bar — | 吧台旁边那个红头发的辣妹 |
[14:45] | that’s Wanda. | 叫旺达 |
[14:46] | Recently came out of a terrible marriage. | 最近刚刚惨淡离婚 |
[14:47] | Nice, nice. | 不错 不错 |
[14:49] | What else you got? | 还有呢 |
[14:50] | Pretty blonde on the couch — that’s Terry. | 沙发上那个金发美女是特瑞 |
[14:53] | She divorced her husband to be a lesbian. | 她踹了她丈夫 当起了女同 |
[14:55] | How’s that working out for Terry? | 特瑞的女同道路顺利吗 |
[14:57] | See the dirty look she’s giving Wanda? | 看到她看旺达的眼神了吗 |
[15:01] | I think I see an opening. | 我觉得有戏 |
[15:03] | And by that you mean…? | 你是指 |
[15:05] | I wasn’t being subtle; I see an opening. | 我说的很直白了 我觉得有戏 |
[15:12] | I knew it. | 我就知道 |
[15:14] | Anything good in my life, you have to take it away. | 凡是我生命里美好的东西 你都得跟我抢 |
[15:18] | “Oh, Charlie, you’re so funny and so clever. | 查理 你真是聪明又幽默 |
[15:20] | Why don’t I lean forward | 我何不弯下腰去 |
[15:21] | so you can look down my dress and see my boobies?” | 好让你一览我的乳沟风光呢 |
[15:24] | “Why, thank you, I believe I will”. | 谢谢 求之不得 |
[15:27] | “So do you want to have sex now | 你是想现在跟我上床呢 |
[15:30] | or wait untill after the party” | 还是等到派对结束呢 |
[15:32] | “You don’t mind that I’m carrying most, | 你不介意我有多种 |
[15:34] | if not all communicable diseases known to man”? | 传染病吗 |
[15:36] | “Oh, no, Charlie, that’s part of your charm. | 不 查理 这也是你迷人的地方之一 |
[15:39] | Come, take me on the couch”. | 来吧 带我到沙发上去 |
[15:41] | “Are you sure? It’s not Scotchgarded” . | 可以吗 沙发还没做防油和防水处理呢 |
[15:43] | “No matter. | 没关系 |
[15:45] | We’ll Scotchgard it with our love” . | 我们可以用咱们之间的爱来润泽它 |
[15:55] | Hello, Mr. Skunk. | 你好 臭鼬先生 |
[15:58] | Don’t be alarmed. | 别紧张 |
[16:00] | Uh, I was just leaving. | 我这就走了 |
[16:01] | Uh, there’s, there’s certainly no reason to feel threatened. | 我完全不会对你造成任何威胁 |
[16:06] | Good skunk. | 臭鼬好 |
[16:08] | Nice skunk. | 臭鼬乖 |
[16:14] | Bad skunk! | 该死的臭鼬 |
[16:19] | Oh, God, oh, God. | 天啊 天啊 |
[16:28] | Oh, God, oh, God. | 天啊 天啊 |
[16:32] | Who’s out there?! | 谁在外面 |
[16:35] | Alan? | 艾伦 |
[16:36] | Hey, Herb. | 你好 赫伯 |
[16:40] | Hope you don’t mind. | 希望你别介意 |
[16:41] | I got skunked. | 我被臭鼬袭击了 |
[16:43] | Oh, you sure did. | 闻得出来 |
[16:45] | How come you’re not at Lyndsey’s party? | 你怎么不去参加琳赛的派对 |
[16:47] | Oh, well, I wanted to, | 我是想去的 |
[16:49] | but Judith came down with a sudden migraine. | 但是朱蒂丝突然偏头疼 |
[16:50] | And by “migraine”, I mean “bitch fit” . | 说好听点是”偏头疼” 其实就是”丧心病狂” |
[16:53] | Got it. | 明白 |
[16:55] | How about you? | 那你呢 |
[16:56] | Oh, Lyndsey and I | 我跟琳赛 |
[16:57] | had kind of a falling-out. | 有点小矛盾 |
[16:59] | ‘Cause you showed up smelling like a skunk? | 因为你臭哄哄的就去了吗 |
[17:02] | No, no. Long story. | 不 不 这说来话长了 |
[17:04] | I got time. | 我正好有时间 |
[17:06] | I-I think she’s fooling around | 我 我认为她背着我 |
[17:08] | with Charlie behind my back. | 跟查理鬼混 |
[17:10] | Charlie? | 查理 |
[17:11] | That lucky duck. | 那个幸运的家伙 |
[17:12] | What? | 你说什么 |
[17:14] | I said, that son of a bitch. | 我说 那该死的混蛋 |
[17:16] | Story of my life. | 这就是我的人生 |
[17:18] | Uh, Wendy Freidman, Kathy Bell, Amy Driskell. | 温迪·弗莱德曼 凯西·贝尔 艾米·得利斯凯 |
[17:21] | Amy Driskell? | 艾米·得利斯凯? |
[17:23] | I lost my virginity to Amy Driskell. | 艾米·得利斯凯是我第一个女人 |
[17:26] | You’re kidding. | 你开玩笑吧 |
[17:28] | Never even had to ask. | 手到擒来 |
[17:31] | It was our first date. | 那是我们第一次约会 |
[17:33] | Never got out of the driveway. | 结果一晚上都没离开车道 |
[17:36] | We weren’t even in a car. | 而且还不是在车里 |
[17:39] | Hey, you know what’s good for getting rid of skunk smell? | 你知道去臭味什么最有效吗 |
[17:41] | Tomato juice. | 番茄汁 |
[17:42] | Great. You got any? | 太好了 你家有吗 |
[17:44] | No. | 没有 |
[17:46] | We might have some V-8. | 不过可能有综合蔬果汁 |
[17:47] | Think that’ll work? | 你觉得会有用吗 |
[17:48] | Well, it sure doesn’t taste | 反正喝起来 |
[17:50] | like tomato juice, | 是一点也不像番茄汁 |
[17:51] | but you couldn’t possibly smell any worse. | 但是反正你也不可能更臭了 |
[17:53] | Hang on. | 等我一下 |
[17:55] | What else could go wrong? | 还有比这更糟的吗 |
[17:58] | Of course. | 当然 |
[18:00] | I’m standing in dog crap. | 我踩在狗屎上了 |
[18:05] | I can’t tell you how happy it makes me | 能一次带两个朋友回家 |
[18:07] | to bring two friends back together. | 我真是开心的溢于言表了 |
[18:13] | Any better? | 好点了吗 |
[18:16] | Not really. | 没 |
[18:18] | Well, that’s all the V-8. | 我把所有蔬果汁都用完了 |
[18:20] | Want to try some ketchup? | 要试试番茄酱吗 |
[18:22] | Why not? | 试试又何妨 |
[18:27] | I found this in one of my son’s shoes. | 我在我儿子的一只鞋里找到了这个 |
[18:32] | Oh, yeah, I can get you better than this. | 我可以给你弄到更好的货 |
[18:35] | That’s what I was hoping. | 正合我意 |
[18:37] | Lyndsey?! | 琳赛 |
[18:42] | Alan? | 艾伦 |
[18:43] | What the hell are you…? | 你是怎么搞的 |
[18:45] | Where is he? | 他在哪 |
[18:47] | Where is who? | 谁在哪 |
[18:48] | What is that smell? | 这是什么味呀 |
[18:50] | Skunk, dog crap and ketchup. Oh. | 臭鼬 狗屎还有番茄酱 |
[18:53] | And don’t try to change the subject. | 别转移话题 |
[18:55] | Where is my brother?! | 我哥在哪 |
[18:57] | Well, he-he left about 20 minutes ago with two women. | 他 他二十分钟前跟俩女人走了 |
[19:00] | Really? | 真的吗 |
[19:02] | Really. | 真的 |
[19:03] | So-so you and he aren’t…? | 这么说你跟他没有 |
[19:05] | That’s what I’ve been telling you, you smelly fool! | 我一直都这么跟你说的呀 你个臭笨蛋 |
[19:11] | Guess we had nothing to fight about. | 看来咱俩没什么好吵的了 |
[19:16] | Hug? | 抱抱吧 |
[19:21] | I’ll call you. | 我回头打给你 |
[19:32] | You don’t scare me. | 你吓不了我的 |
[19:33] | You already shot your load. | 你已经放过一次臭屁了 |
[19:39] | Although I suppose you could be a different skunk. | 不过看来你不是刚才那只臭鼬 |
[19:52] | So all I’m saying is, given my history, | 所以我要说的就是 鉴于我的历史 |
[19:54] | Alan’s paranoia is not completely uncalled for. | 艾伦的疑神疑鬼也不是毫无根据的 |
[19:56] | No, no, this wasn’t paranoia. | 不 不 这不是疑神疑鬼 |
[19:57] | This was insanity. | 这简直就是精神不正常 |
[19:59] | I know, I know, but… | 我知道 我知道 但是 |
[20:00] | The man was covered in ketchup. | 那家伙浑身的番茄酱 |
[20:02] | Well, to be fair, there was a time in your life | 说句公道话 你也曾经 |
[20:05] | when you were covered in frosting. | 浑身糖霜呀 |
[20:06] | It’s not the same thing. | 这不一样 |
[20:08] | I was putting myself through college. | 我那是为了挣大学学费 |
[20:11] | Look, all I know is that Alan really loves you. | 我只知道艾伦真的爱你 |
[20:15] | Now, if you ever repeat this, I will deny it, | 如果你以后再提这事 我会否认我说过这话 |
[20:17] | but my brother is about the most decent human being I know. | 不过我弟弟是我认识的最正派的人了 |
[20:20] | Can’t you just give him one more chance? | 你就不能再给他一次机会吗 |
[20:22] | Well, I suppose. | 也许吧 |
[20:25] | I knew it! | 我就知道 |
[20:29] | You bastard! | 你个混蛋 |
[20:31] | You slut! | 你个荡妇 |
[20:37] | So what do you say? | 你意下如何 |