时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:00] | Scientific rivalries are a fact of life. | 科学之战是真实存在的 |
[00:03] | When two competing scientists work on a project, | 竞争关系的科学家合作项目时 |
[00:06] | it can devolve into an intellectual boxing match. | 有可能会变成不堪的智力拳击赛 |
[00:09] | Over the years, there’s been a few classic heavyweight bouts. | 历史上曾有过几次经典大对决 |
[00:12] | Newton and Leibniz. | 牛顿与莱布尼兹的微积分之战 |
[00:13] | Tesla and Edison. | 特斯拉与爱迪生的电流大战 |
[00:15] | And in a lesser-known but equally brutal bout… | 还有一场较少人知道 但也同样你死我活的 |
[00:18] | Linkletter versus Sturgis, | 林克莱特大战斯特吉斯 |
[00:21] | The Tussle with No Muscle. | 决战弱鸡之巅 |
[00:23] | Let’s see how they stack up in a tale of the tape. | 来对比一下他们赛场上的数据 |
[00:27] | In the wire frame glasses, the Eureka from Topeka, | 戴着眼镜的是托皮卡市发现者 |
[00:32] | Grant Linkletter. | 格兰特·林克莱特 |
[00:35] | I.Q. 159. | 智商159 |
[00:37] | Papers published: 272. | 发表论文272篇 |
[00:40] | Bed time: 8:30. | 晚上就寝时间8点半 |
[00:42] | And his opponent, | 接下来是他的对手 |
[00:45] | in his favorite sensible shoes, | 穿着他最喜欢的舒适鞋子 |
[00:47] | The Brain from Maine, | 缅因大脑 |
[00:49] | John Burgess Sturgis! | 约翰·伯吉斯·斯特吉斯 |
[00:54] | I.Q. 162. | 智商162 |
[00:56] | Papers published: 221. | 发表论文221篇 |
[00:59] | Bedtime: 7:45 on weekdays, | 平日就寝时间7点45 |
[01:02] | 9:00 on Saturday night. | 周六晚9点睡 |
[01:04] | Fasten your thinking caps and let’s get it on. | 戴稳各位的聪明帽 大战马上开始 |
[01:09] | The free-streaming length of the axion is too long. | 轴子的自由流长度太长 |
[01:12] | It’ll erase the fluctuations. | 波动会被消除 |
[01:14] | You’re completely forgetting that it is nonrelativistic dark matter. | 你完全忘了这是非相对论性的暗物质吧 |
[01:18] | You’ll never have the resolution to see microkelvin features. | 你永远得不到足够的解析度来观测到微开的特性 |
[01:21] | I think your brain is as smooth as the top of your head. | 你的大脑皮层就跟你的头顶一样平吧 |
[01:24] | Low blow, Grant. | 秃顶玩笑也太没品了吧 格兰特 |
[01:26] | He’s right, gentlemen, let’s keep it to science. | 他说得对 两位出招请保持在科学范围内 |
[01:29] | You’ll never have the resolution to see microkelvin features. | 你永远得不到足够的解析度来观测到微开的特性 |
[01:33] | ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ | ♪ 世上没人比我强壮 ♪ |
[01:36] | ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ | ♪ 昨天我移了一座山 ♪ |
[01:38] | ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ | ♪ 我相信我能当你的英雄 ♪ |
[01:41] | ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ | ♪ 我是个了不起的小家伙 ♪ |
[01:44] | ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ | ♪ 我是个了不起的小家伙 ♪ |
[01:53] | I cannot work with that creepy little know-it-all one more day. | 我忍不了再跟那个装逼小贼合作哪怕一天 |
[01:58] | I-I’m sorry, but are we talking about Sheldon or Sturgis? | 抱歉 你是在说谢尔顿还是斯特吉斯 |
[02:01] | Sturgis. Well, both, but mostly Sturgis. | 斯特吉斯啊 其实两个都是 但主要是他 |
[02:05] | He’s not interested in anyone else’s input. | 他这个人听不进任何人的意见 |
[02:07] | I-I’m sorry, Sheldon or Linkletter? | 抱歉 是在说谢尔顿还是林克莱特 |
[02:10] | Linkletter. | 林克莱特啊 |
[02:11] | Ah, got it. Continue. | 好的 您继续 |
[02:13] | Well? | 怎么样 |
[02:14] | But I thought you wanted Dr. Sturgis on this project. | 但不是你希望斯特吉斯博士来合作吗 |
[02:17] | I’ll admit John has been useful, but now he’s just slowing us down. | 我承认约翰有过贡献 但现在他只会拖后腿 |
[02:21] | Well, he keeps Sheldon happy, | 但他能让谢尔顿高兴 |
[02:24] | and when Sheldon’s happy, he’s not in this office. | 谢尔顿一高兴 就不会来我办公室 |
[02:26] | Well, but when he’s not in your office, he’s in my office. | 他不来你办公室的时候 就上我这里来了 |
[02:29] | Eh, “Dem’s da breaks.” | 你就”既来之则安之吧” |
[02:31] | I was brought in to help | 我是被找来救火的 |
[02:33] | but Dr. Linkletter doesn’t value my input. | 但林克莱特博士不重视我的贡献 |
[02:36] | Oh, I hear you. That must be tough. | 我听懂了 这一定很难受吧 |
[02:39] | Ever since he was brought back, he contradicts everything I say. | 打从他被拉进来 他就处处都跟我作对 |
[02:43] | I hear you. That must be tough. | 我听懂了 这一定很难受吧 |
[02:45] | There was a time when their arguing brought out | 一开始的时候 他们斗嘴能激发灵感 |
[02:46] | the best in them, but now it’s just hindering our work. | 但现在斗的嘴单纯只是浪费宝贵时间罢了 |
[02:49] | I hear you. That must be tough. | 我听懂了 这一定很难受吧 |
[02:51] | Thank you for understanding. | 谢谢你的理解 |
[02:52] | And between us, I am counting on you being in charge. | 你要保守秘密啊 我看好你能领导好团队 |
[02:58] | Excellent. | 太好了 |
[02:59] | You’re the alpha dog on this project. | 你才是这个项目的老大 |
[03:02] | Very good. | 这就对了 |
[03:03] | But shouldn’t we tell everyone? | 但这件事得昭告天下吧 |
[03:06] | Oh, no, no, no, no. I can’t be seen as playing favorites. | 不不不 不行 不能让人觉得我偏袒你 |
[03:09] | But what’s important is that I know and you know. | 反正最重要的是天知地知你知我知 |
[03:13] | Smart. | 聪明 |
[03:14] | But not as smart as you. | 再聪明也没有你聪明啊 |
[03:16] | Which is why, uh, just between us, | 你别说出去 但我要告诉你 |
[03:20] | I am counting on you to keep the train on the tracks. | 我就指望着你能带领这列车走在正轨上 |
[03:23] | Well, I appreciate the vote of confidence. | 我很感谢你对我投下的信任票 |
[03:25] | – And the sweet train metaphor. – Well, good. | -以及特意为我用的火车哏 -那就好 |
[03:28] | You know, I just want you to be happy. | 我也只是希望你能高兴嘛 |
[03:29] | I guess in a way I’m kind of like the son you never had. | 某种程度上来说 我就像是你从未有过的儿子吧 |
[03:32] | Sure. | 算吧 |
[03:33] | Which is nice, because you’re far too old to have children now. | 这样也挺好的 毕竟你过了生育年龄很久了 |
[03:37] | And you make me feel okay about that. | 托您的福 我感到毫不难过 |
[03:40] | Wait. | 等等 |
[03:43] | $20 on pump four, please. | 4号机 20块 谢谢 |
[03:45] | You got it. | 没问题 |
[03:48] | Here you go. | 给 |
[03:51] | What’s this? | 这是什么 |
[03:52] | Promotion for the new lottery. | 新彩票的促销活动 |
[03:53] | Every ten gallons, you get a free scratcher. | 每加38升油就送一张免费刮刮乐 |
[03:55] | Oh, I don’t believe in gambling. | 我觉得赌博不好 |
[03:57] | Great, I’ll take it. | 好 那我就收下了 |
[03:58] | Oh, I don’t believe you should be gambling, either. | 我觉得赌博对你也不好 |
[04:01] | So, you don’t want it? | 你到底还要不要 |
[04:02] | – No. – Then I’m scratching it. | -不要 -那我要开刮了 |
[04:04] | Sorry. Not on my watch. | 抱歉 有我在谁都不许赌 |
[04:07] | You can thank me in heaven. | 以后上天堂了再谢我吧 |
[04:14] | What’s this formula? | 这是什么公式 |
[04:15] | This wasn’t here yesterday. | 昨天不在这黑板上啊 |
[04:17] | Dr. Linkletter added it after you left. | 林克莱特博士在你走之后加上去的 |
[04:20] | Was he trying to be funny? | 他是故意在搞笑吗 |
[04:22] | He was giggling at your “Feebleminded math.” | 他的确是有在笑你的”逗比数学” |
[04:24] | His words. | 我原话转述 |
[04:25] | He’s trying to approximate | 他是在试图把 |
[04:27] | the cosmic background radiation by setting it at one Rydberg over Z, | 宇宙背景辐射设为R/Z |
[04:32] | and my math is feebleminded? | 他还好意思说我的数学逗比 |
[04:38] | What do you think you’re doing? | 你在发什么疯 |
[04:40] | I’m changing the estimate | 我要把预估值改到 |
[04:42] | to Robert Dicke’s value of 45 kelvin. | 罗伯特·迪克推算的45开氏度 |
[04:45] | I wasn’t here the last time he went off his rocker. | 他上次发疯的时候我人不在没看到 |
[04:48] | Is this what it looked like? | 原来就是这样子吗 |
[04:49] | I’m perfectly sane, and I’m telling you, | 我脑子很清楚 我告诉你 |
[04:52] | Dicke’s estimate is the way to go. | 迪克的推算才是正确的 |
[04:54] | And I’m telling you we need to use | 我告诉你 我们就是得用 |
[04:55] | one Rydberg over Z, and that is final. | R/Z 这是最终决定 |
[04:58] | Oh, is it, you albino beanpole? | 是吗 你个白化竹竿 |
[05:02] | Dr. Sturgis. | 斯特吉斯博士 |
[05:03] | He impugned my mental stability. | 是他先吐槽我的精神状况 |
[05:06] | Fair enough. Your insult stands. | 公平起见 你的吐槽成立 |
[05:08] | Thank you. Beanpole. | 谢谢 竹竿 |
[05:28] | Oh, man. | 哇塞 |
[05:30] | God, I swear I’ll never ask | 神啊 我发誓 |
[05:31] | for anything again, just one more 500. | 再开一个500给我 我此生再也不要别的 |
[05:34] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[05:35] | Melissa Cooper, what are you doing with that? | 梅丽莎·库珀 你拿着那东西干什么 |
[05:38] | I found it. | 我捡到的 |
[05:39] | Well, it is mine, and I threw it away for a reason. | 那是我的东西 我丢掉是有理由的 |
[05:42] | It’s mine now, and I might win 500 bucks. | 捡到就是我的了 我要中500块啦 |
[05:45] | Oh, no, you won’t. | 你想得美 |
[05:46] | – I’ll split it with you. – No. | -我之后给你分红 -不行 |
[05:48] | Why are you being so lame? | 你干嘛这么烦啊 |
[05:50] | Because money does not buy happiness. | 金钱是买不到快乐的 |
[05:53] | Fresh Prince seems pretty happy. | 电视上的新鲜王子就挺高兴的啊 |
[05:55] | It is not his money, it’s his Uncle Phil’s! | 他没有钱 是寄住的姨夫家有钱 |
[06:20] | Half of that’s mine. I prayed for it. | 这是我祈祷来的 你得分我一半 |
[06:22] | Go to your room. | 回你的房间 |
[06:26] | You’re wasting valuable time. | 你在浪费宝贵时间 |
[06:28] | I’m not, you are. | 我没有 你才在浪费 |
[06:29] | Gentlemen, if we could please keep this train on the tracks… | 先生们 请让这辆研究列车保持正轨… |
[06:32] | We’ll be on track if we follow my plan, | 我们按我的计划走就会在正轨了 |
[06:34] | so I’m afraid I’m going to have to insist. | 所以抱歉 我必须要坚持己见了 |
[06:36] | Insist? | 坚持个大头鬼 |
[06:36] | You’re not the alpha dog around here. | 你又不是团队的老大 |
[06:38] | I agree. | 我同意 |
[06:40] | This may be hard for both of you to hear, | 这话说出来你俩可能会不好受 |
[06:41] | but President Hagemeyer put me in charge. | 但哈格迈尔校长指派我为领导 |
[06:44] | I know for a fact that isn’t true, | 我知道你这话肯定是假的 |
[06:47] | because she put me in charge. | 因为她让我当领导 |
[06:50] | We may have a problem. | 我们可能有个问题 |
[06:53] | What can I say? | 我能说什么 |
[06:54] | I tried something. | 总得试试 万一呢 |
[07:00] | So you really thought you could tell us we were all in charge | 你真觉得分别骗我们是团队领导 |
[07:02] | and we wouldn’t figure it out? | 我们不会发现吗 |
[07:04] | Well, in my defense, I said to each of you, | 我只想说 我也明确告诉过你们三个 |
[07:07] | “Let’s keep this between us.” | “你要保守秘密啊” |
[07:09] | I’m a little disappointed that you broke my trust. | 你们破坏了我的信任 我有点失望 |
[07:13] | That is true. We’re sorry. | 的确 我们很对不起 |
[07:15] | Don’t apologize for that. We were being manipulated. | 别道歉 她使手段想操纵我们呢 |
[07:17] | You were the one who blabbed first. | 第一个说出秘密的就是你 |
[07:19] | That’s because you kept slowing us down | 那是因为你一直在拖大家后腿 |
[07:21] | with your outmoded ideas. | 提一堆过时的主意 |
[07:22] | Gentlemen, if we could just follow my plan… | 先生们 如果你们都能按我说的… |
[07:23] | – No. – No. | -不要 -不要 |
[07:25] | Well, I hope that you’re starting | 希望你们能开始理解 |
[07:26] | to see the challenge I faced putting any of you in charge. | 我要想让任何人当领导会碰到的困境 |
[07:30] | You’re right, we’re sorry. | 你说得对 我们很抱歉 |
[07:31] | – Stop that. – Sorry. | -别道歉了 -对不起 |
[07:33] | Well, we can’t move forward until a project leader is chosen. | 在项目领导被选出来之前 我们无法继续 |
[07:36] | He’s right, I’ll do it. | 他说得对 我愿意接下来 |
[07:38] | – You’re a child. – You’re a child. | -你就是个孩子 -你才是老屁孩 |
[07:40] | Oh, you’re all children. | 你们都是幼稚鬼 |
[07:41] | Sorry. Sorry. | 抱歉 抱歉 |
[07:44] | Well, who’s it gonna be? | 所以到底选谁呢 |
[07:46] | Gentlemen, I’m Dr. Carol Lee, | 先生们 我是卡萝·李博士 |
[07:48] | director of the new experimental cosmology center. | 新的实验宇宙学中心主任 |
[07:52] | What makes you qualified to lead our project? | 你有什么资格能领导我们的项目 |
[07:54] | – Yeah. – Yeah. | -对啊 -对啊 |
[07:55] | Well, I have a PhD in physics from Berkeley, | 我有伯克利大学的物理博士学位 |
[07:59] | I worked at IBM’s Watson Research Center | 我曾经在IBM的沃森研究中心工作 |
[08:01] | as lead of the materials research group, | 领导材料研究团队 |
[08:04] | and I raised three little boys, | 我还养大了3个小男孩 |
[08:06] | which I understand you’ve been acting like. | 恰好跟你们3个家伙如出一辙 |
[08:11] | Sounds like she can handle it. | 感觉她十分有资格能胜任 |
[08:13] | Dear Lord, please forgive me. | 亲爱的主啊 请原谅我的罪 |
[08:14] | I shouldn’t have finished that scratcher. | 我不应该刮完那张刮刮乐 |
[08:16] | That was wrong. | 那是不对的 |
[08:18] | But now that I have the money, my family could really use it. | 但我现在刮到了这份奖金 我们家真的用得上 |
[08:23] | I know. Gambling is a sin. | 我知道赌博是有罪的 |
[08:26] | Although, I didn’t buy the scratcher, | 但是呢 我没有花钱买那张刮刮卡 |
[08:29] | so is that even gambling? | 这样还算是赌博吗 |
[08:31] | Why is Missy saying we’re rich? | 为什么米希说我们家发财了 |
[08:35] | I suggest we mount a radio telescope on the roof | 我建议我们在屋顶架一座电波望远镜 |
[08:39] | so that we can get a good read on the fluctuations in radiation. | 这样我们就能清楚得到电波波动的数据 |
[08:43] | Excellent. | 太棒了 |
[08:44] | We’ll pick a small region of the sky and drill down. | 我们挑选某一小块天空 然后深入研究 |
[08:46] | Whoa, whoa, pump your brakes. | 哎哟哟 悠着点吧 |
[08:49] | We need at least a 45-square-degree sector of the sky | 我们需要至少45平方度的天空 |
[08:52] | in order to take any meaningful readings. | 才有机会得到任何有实际意义的数据啊 |
[08:55] | That’s ridiculous. What we need to do is cut | 太扯了吧 我们需要做的 |
[08:56] | a single linear section across the horizon. | 是从地平线切开一条线来观测 |
[08:59] | No, if we don’t focus, we won’t get any useful data. | 不 如果我们不集中观测 是得不到有用数据的 |
[09:01] | I suggest 20 arc minutes max. | 我建议最多20弧分 |
[09:03] | The trick is to pick a good spot. | 妙招是要挑到一个好地点 |
[09:05] | You want a trick? Go see David Copperfield. | 想看妙招去看魔术师吧 |
[09:08] | How about I make you disappear? | 要不我来把你变不见吧 |
[09:11] | Do I need to separate you? | 是我让你们去角落冷静 |
[09:12] | Or can we try to put our minds together | 还是我们能齐心协力 |
[09:16] | for the advancement of science? | 为了科学进步而合作 |
[09:19] | The second one. | 第二种 |
[09:21] | I know you’re new here, ma’am, but this is our process. | 女士 我知道你刚来还不熟 但我们都是这样 |
[09:24] | They argue, I swoop in and save the day. | 他们斗嘴 我负责收场拯救世界 |
[09:26] | It may seem unorthodox to you, however… | 虽然过程有点奇葩 但… |
[09:30] | The-the second one. | 第… 第二种 |
[09:32] | I’m gonna tell you right now, we can’t keep it. | 我告诉你 我们不能留下来 |
[09:35] | It’s not a puppy, Mary, it’s 500 bucks. | 又不是捡到流浪狗 这可是500块啊 玛丽 |
[09:38] | It is gambling. | 这是赌博 |
[09:40] | Then why’d you buy the ticket? | 那你为什么买 |
[09:41] | I didn’t buy it. They gave it to me at the gas station. | 我没买啊 是加油站的人送的 |
[09:45] | Okay, well, that sounds like a gift from God. | 感觉这是上天要赐我们的礼物啊 |
[09:48] | You don’t want to make Him mad. | 你不能违背祂的好意啊 |
[09:49] | That is not how God works, George. | 主才不会这样呢 乔治 |
[09:51] | What if he wanted you to have it to give to the Church? | 假如祂是希望你收下然后捐给教会呢 |
[09:55] | Well… | 这个… |
[09:56] | Well, uh, based on that, what if he wanted you to have it | 从上一句引申 假如祂是希望你收下 |
[09:58] | – so we could buy stuff? – George. | -用来买东西呢 -乔治 |
[10:00] | All I’m saying is, we work hard, we’re good people. | 我想说的是 我们辛勤工作 正直善良 |
[10:03] | Maybe we deserve this. | 也许这是我们应得的 |
[10:08] | I guess a dishwasher might be nice. | 如果能有台洗碗机是挺好的 |
[10:10] | There you go. Get a dishwasher. | 这就对了 去买洗碗机 |
[10:12] | I don’t know. I’ll think about it. | 我说不好 我再考虑考虑 |
[10:15] | What’s to think about? Have some fun for once. | 有什么好考虑的 偶尔也要享乐一下 |
[10:18] | Ooh, we getting something fun with the money? | 我们要用那笔钱去享乐吗 |
[10:19] | We’re talking about a dishwasher. | 我们在商量买台洗碗机 |
[10:21] | When did your dreams die? | 你们的梦想几时消逝的 |
[10:24] | – When we had kids. – George. | -有了小孩之后 -乔治 |
[10:26] | I was carrying pulsers 75 feet up | 当时我正扛着脉冲发生器 站在离地 |
[10:30] | a wet metal ladder | 75英尺的湿滑金属梯上 |
[10:32] | when there was an earthquake. | 突然发生了地震 |
[10:33] | So, I am hanging on for dear life… | 我为了活命紧紧抓着… |
[10:37] | Ooh, we should set up several radio telescopes | 我们应该在各栋建筑的屋顶上 |
[10:39] | on different rooftops in an array. | 组建电波望远镜阵列 |
[10:45] | You speak Mandarin. | 你会说中文 |
[10:56] | I heard my name. What are they saying? | 我听见我名字了 他们在说什么 |
[10:58] | I don’t speak Mandarin. Just a little French. | 我不会说中文 只会一点法语 |
[11:01] | Oh, really? | 真的吗 |
[11:06] | Ha! | 哈 |
[11:11] | Well, does anyone here speak Klingon? | 在场有人会说克林贡语吗[《星际旅行》] |
[11:23] | – Dr. Lee? – Sheldon. | -李博士 -谢尔顿 |
[11:25] | May I have a moment of your time? | 我能占用您一点时间吗 |
[11:27] | Of course, come in. | 当然 请进 |
[11:29] | Sit. | 坐吧 |
[11:31] | How can I help you? | 你有什么事 |
[11:33] | I feel like my contributions aren’t being taken seriously. | 我感觉我的贡献没受到重视 |
[11:37] | Oh, well, I’m sorry you feel that way, | 很遗憾你有这种感觉 |
[11:39] | but I’m listening to everyone’s contributions. | 但我有仔细倾听每个人的提议 |
[11:42] | But you’re not taking any of mine. | 可你没接纳我任何一条提议 |
[11:44] | No. But Drs. Linkletter and Sturgis | 确实 但林克莱特和斯特吉斯博士 |
[11:47] | seem happy with the direction we’re headed. | 似乎对我们现在的走向很满意 |
[11:50] | Well, I think it’s because | 我想是因为 |
[11:52] | you’re using your feminine wiles. | 你利用了女人的小心机 |
[11:55] | And what exactly do you think that means? | 你认为那具体指什么 |
[11:58] | I’m not sure, but you are wearing lip gloss | 我不确定 但你涂了唇釉 |
[12:00] | and seem to have good hygiene. | 看似有良好的的卫生习惯 |
[12:01] | And if you’re trying to use them on me, it’s not going to work. | 如果你想用同样招数来对付我 是行不通的 |
[12:05] | Sheldon, I assure you | 谢尔顿 我向你保证 |
[12:07] | that I’m just trying to do | 我只是想做 |
[12:08] | what’s best for the project. | 对项目最有利的事 |
[12:09] | Excellent, then you’ll want to set up | 好极了 那你最好 |
[12:11] | several telescopes in an array. | 组建电波望远镜阵列 |
[12:13] | I hear you, but… ghobe’. | 知道了 但… |
[12:17] | Wait, that’s “No” in Klingon. Do you speak Klingon? | 等下 那是克林贡语的”不” 你会说克林贡语 |
[12:19] | I looked up that one word. | 我只查了那一个词 |
[12:21] | I had a feeling it would come in handy. | 我有预感会用得上 |
[12:28] | Ooh, look at the Ultra-Clean Two. | 你看这台超净二号 |
[12:31] | It’s got five washing cycles. | 有五个清洗流程 |
[12:33] | I don’t know, George, these are really expensive. | 我不确定 乔治 这种好贵 |
[12:36] | You won the money. Spend it. | 你赢了钱就该豪爽地花掉啊 |
[12:40] | Maybe we should just get a more affordable one. | 也许我们该买一台更实惠的 |
[12:43] | Everything we do is affordable. Uh… splurge for once. | 我们一直精打细算过日子 偶尔也要挥霍一把 |
[12:46] | It’s so extravagant. | 可这太奢华了 |
[12:48] | You’d think we were talking about | 你说得好像我们在商量 |
[12:49] | buying a party boat. | 买派对钓鱼船 |
[12:50] | It’s a dishwasher, for crying out loud. | 不过是台洗碗机而已 |
[12:53] | But the way we got the money, it just doesn’t feel right. | 但这钱来得不光彩 总感觉这样做不对 |
[12:57] | So you’re telling me you’re never okay | 你意思是你绝不能接受 |
[12:59] | with bending the rules once in a while? | 偶尔钻空子 变通一下 |
[13:01] | That’s not how being a Christian works. | 这有违基督徒的原则 |
[13:04] | Good to know. | 挺好的 |
[13:08] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么 |
[13:09] | Oh, just helping you be a good Christian. | 帮你当个好基督徒 |
[13:15] | Dr. Lee had commandeered the project, | 李博士霸占了项目 |
[13:18] | and Drs. Linkletter and Sturgis were okay with it. | 林克莱特和斯特吉斯博士都没意见 |
[13:20] | Everyone was being mean, and I was out of my depth. | 所有人都好刻薄 我应付不了 |
[13:24] | I needed advice on how to proceed. | 我需要建议才知道该如何推进 |
[13:26] | Thankfully, I was mere feet away | 幸好 离我几步之遥 |
[13:28] | from the person who had been mean to me | 就有一个欺负了我一辈子的人 |
[13:30] | since she tried strangling me with her umbilical cord. | 她出生那刻就试图用脐带勒死我 |
[13:33] | What? | 干嘛 |
[13:34] | So, this Dr. Lee is turning your friends against you? | 这个李博士让你的朋友都背叛你了 |
[13:37] | Essentially. | 基本上是这样 |
[13:38] | Classic move. | 典型招数 |
[13:40] | Most girls you find crying in the school bathroom, | 大部分躲在学校厕所哭的女生 |
[13:42] | that was it. | 都是被这招阴的 |
[13:42] | What do I do? | 我该怎么做 |
[13:44] | Well, you’re in a tough spot | 你现在处境艰难 |
[13:45] | ’cause your personality is ugh. | 因为你本身不招人待见 |
[13:47] | There’s enough people being mean to me right now. | 现在对我刻薄的人已经够多了 |
[13:49] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
[13:50] | Can you help me or not? | 你到底能不能帮我 |
[13:51] | It’s you against a bunch of college professors. | 你的对手是一群大学教授 |
[13:54] | I don’t think you can win this one. | 我想这场仗你赢不了 |
[13:58] | Oh. Do any of them have pimples? | 对了 他们有人长痘痘吗 |
[14:01] | No. | 没有 |
[14:02] | Too bad, I’ve done a lot of damage with “Pizza face.” | 可惜 我用”疙瘩披萨脸”辱骂哭了无数人 |
[14:06] | He just took the ticket | 他直接拿起彩票 |
[14:08] | and stormed off. | 气冲冲地走了 |
[14:09] | I don’t know why he cares so much about a dishwasher. | 我不知道他为何如此在乎一台洗碗机 |
[14:12] | Maybe it ain’t about the dishwasher. | 也许重点不是洗碗机 |
[14:14] | Well, what is it, then? | 那是什么 |
[14:16] | Mary, I love you, but sometimes it’s kind of like | 玛丽 我爱你 但有时你就好像 |
[14:18] | you’re waging a war on fun. | 在向”享乐”宣战 |
[14:21] | Why? Because I have values? | 为什么 就因为我有价值观吗 |
[14:24] | Well, too bad because they’re not going away. | 那很遗憾 因为我的价值观不会消失 |
[14:26] | Oh, and fun is down for the count. | 那享乐就死翘翘了 |
[14:29] | 500 bucks? | 五百块 |
[14:31] | I guess drinks are on you. | 那酒你来埋单 |
[14:33] | Fine, but is that all you got from my story? | 行 但听完我说的你只有这想法吗 |
[14:36] | It’s called lightening the mood, George. | 这叫缓和气氛 乔治 |
[14:39] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
[14:41] | But I do think you’re overreacting. | 但我觉得你反应过激了 |
[14:44] | Come on. | 拜托 |
[14:45] | I… Would it kill her to loosen up once in a while? | 难道她放松一次会死吗 |
[14:48] | Maybe that’s just not who she is. | 也许她就不是那样的人 |
[14:50] | What if it is, just not with me? | 万一她是在我身边才无法放松呢 |
[14:54] | Well, what does that mean? | 这话是什么意思 |
[14:56] | The other night I drove by the church | 前几天晚上我开车经过教堂 |
[14:59] | and I saw Mary and that new youth pastor | 看见玛丽和那个新来的青年牧师 |
[15:00] | just hanging out on the curb, laughing and smoking cigarettes. | 坐在路边闲聊 边抽烟边笑得很开心 |
[15:06] | Yeah? And? | 是吗 那又怎样 |
[15:07] | Well, that’s not enough? | 这还不够吗 |
[15:09] | Well, is smoking even a sin? | 抽烟也有罪吗 |
[15:11] | ‘Cause I still light up after a roll in the hay. | 我滚完床单也会点上一根 |
[15:14] | The point is, she’s capable of being fun, just… | 重点是 她是能放松玩闹的 只是… |
[15:18] | not with me. | 不是跟我在一起时 |
[15:20] | It’s not like I don’t want to be fun, | 我也不是不想享乐 |
[15:23] | but I feel like | 但我感觉 |
[15:24] | I am the only one holding the family together. | 只有我一个人在苦苦支撑这个家 |
[15:26] | Mary, can I point out that you weren’t exactly like this | 玛丽 我能指出你们刚结婚时 |
[15:30] | when y’all got married? | 你不是这样的吗 |
[15:31] | So? I’m not allowed to grow? | 怎么 我不能有所成长吗 |
[15:33] | Apart? Okay. | 成长到跟他产生隔阂吗 行啊 |
[15:37] | What made you and your wife call it quits? | 你和你妻子为什么决定分开 |
[15:39] | George, let me tell you something. | 乔治 我跟你说 |
[15:41] | Getting divorced sucks. | 离婚的感觉糟透了 |
[15:43] | – I know. – You don’t. | -我知道 -你不知道 |
[15:45] | If you think you’re upset about a $500 scratcher, | 如果你觉得五百块刮刮乐已经够让你难受了 |
[15:48] | try sitting home alone with half your money gone. | 试试孤零零坐在家里 还没了半副身家 |
[15:52] | I thought you were gonna say something about love and vows. | 我还以为你要说爱啊誓言啊之类的 |
[15:55] | Half, George. | 足足一半啊 乔治 |
[15:56] | And it wasn’t a lot when it was a whole. | 本来全副身家也没多少 |
[15:58] | I said I’d buy your drinks. | 我说了会请你喝酒 |
[16:00] | Well, thank you. | 谢谢你 |
[16:03] | Wings wouldn’t hurt, either. | 再来盘鸡翅也无妨 |
[16:04] | My sister thought I was in an unwinnable situation, | 我妹妹认为我赢不了 |
[16:07] | but I knew someone else who faced | 但我知道另一个人 曾在绝境中 |
[16:08] | a no-win scenario and prevailed: one James Tiberius Kirk. | 反败为胜 那就是詹姆斯·泰比里厄斯·柯克 |
[16:13] | The Kobayashi Maru was a simulation | 根据程序设定 |
[16:15] | designed to be unbeatable, but Kirk snuck in | 小林丸号测试是不可能通过的 |
[16:18] | and reprogrammed it so he could win. | 但柯克通过修改程序 通过了测试 |
[16:19] | All I needed to do was put my scanning coordinates | 我只需把我的观测目标坐标 |
[16:22] | into Dr. Lee’s radio telescope to prove I was correct. | 输进李博士的电波望远镜 证明我是对的 |
[16:26] | It was time for my sneaky face. | 该摆出我的搞事鬼祟脸了 |
[16:38] | This is yours. | 这是你的 |
[16:40] | And if you don’t feel right spending it, | 如果你觉得不应该花掉 |
[16:41] | then you should do whatever you want with it. | 那你想用来做什么都随你 |
[16:45] | Thank you. | 谢谢你 |
[16:51] | You know, I’ve been thinking that | 我一直在想 |
[16:53] | maybe it isn’t | 其实 |
[16:54] | the end of the world if we spend it on something fun. | 这笔钱拿去享受一下 天也不会塌下来 |
[16:58] | Really? | 真的吗 |
[16:59] | Yeah, something the family could enjoy. | 嗯 做全家人都会高兴的事 |
[17:03] | Well… | 这样的话 |
[17:04] | we haven’t been on vacation in a long time. | 我们很久没全家一起去度假了 |
[17:09] | We could go to Houston, see the Ice Capades. | 我们可以去休斯顿 看白雪溜冰团 |
[17:13] | Let’s keep thinking. | 我们再想想吧 |
[17:16] | The next evening, I put my plan into action. | 第二天傍晚 我去实施计划 |
[17:19] | I was just like Captain Kirk, | 我和柯克舰长简直一模一样 |
[17:21] | if Captain Kirk had to bum a ride from his meemaw. | 前提是柯克舰长也需要求姥姥开车送他一程 |
[17:23] | All I needed to do was get into Dr. Lee’s office | 我要做的就是潜入李博士的办公室 |
[17:26] | and swap the coordinates. | 把坐标换掉 |
[17:28] | Nothing could stop me. | 没什么能阻止我 |
[17:31] | Dang it. | 该死 |
[17:34] | Well, here’s to male egos | 敬男性自尊 |
[17:35] | and all the fun that comes with them. | 和随之而来的笑话 |
[17:39] | You’ve had to deal with that a lot, huh? | 你经常需要面对这些 对吧 |
[17:41] | The first month I was here, people kept assuming | 我来这里的第一个月 人们总默认 |
[17:44] | I was the president’s secretary. | 我是校长的秘书 |
[17:46] | Did you correct them? | 你有指正他们吗 |
[17:49] | No, I just told them that the president was too busy | 没有 我告诉他们校长太忙了 |
[17:51] | to see them and then I cut their funding. | 没空见他们 然后默默削减他们经费 |
[17:54] | That must have felt good. | 那感觉一定超爽 |
[17:55] | Ah, it was like taking off my bra at the end of a long day. | 就像度过漫长一天后终于脱下胸罩一样 |
[17:59] | Mm-hmm. But I don’t have to tell you. | 不过我不说你也懂 |
[18:02] | Can you believe there were only three women in my major? | 你能相信吗 我的专业只有三个女性 |
[18:05] | Oh, at least you had each other. | 至少你们能互相帮助 |
[18:07] | Those bitches? Pass. | 那些臭婊子 算了吧 |
[18:09] | What about the guys? | 那些男的呢 |
[18:11] | Either too scared to talk to me | 要么不敢跟我说话 |
[18:12] | or trying to talk me into being horizontal. | 要么想拐我”露出天体” |
[18:14] | Oh, yeah, I hear that. | 我懂 |
[18:16] | I’ve even had projects sabotaged just to make me look bad. | 甚至有人蓄意破坏我的项目 就为了让我出丑 |
[18:20] | – You’re kidding. – Nope. | -开玩笑的吧 -真的 |
[18:37] | Well, what did you do? | 那你做了什么 |
[18:38] | Well, eventually I realized, | 最终我意识到 |
[18:40] | I’m an experimental physicist. | 我是实验物理学家 |
[18:42] | I can build anything I want to protect my work. | 我想造什么机关来保护我的研究都行 |
[18:51] | And thanks to my kids, | 多亏了我家孩子们 |
[18:53] | I am very familiar with the movie Home Alone. | 我对《小鬼当家》那部电影非常熟悉 |
[19:00] | After a lot of apologizing, a little begging | 经过多番道歉 一点求情 |
[19:03] | and a note from my mother, | 和我母亲写的保证书后 |
[19:04] | I was allowed to keep my role on the team. | 我保住了在团队的位置 |
[19:07] | When Captain Kirk faced the no-win scenario, | 柯克舰长身处绝境时 |
[19:09] | he didn’t have blue and yellow snot for a week. | 他不用连续一周流蓝黄交加的鼻涕 |
[19:20] | Sounds like the ocean. | 像大海的声音 |
[19:22] | Oh, it is very relaxing. | 很令人放松 |
[19:23] | Kind of makes the rest of the kitchen look trashy. | 有了它 厨房其他地方看起来都很垃圾 |
[19:26] | Ooh, it has a temperature boost sensor. | 它配有温升感应器 |
[19:28] | What’s that? | 那是什么 |
[19:30] | It makes sure the water is heated | 确保水被加热到 |
[19:31] | to the correct temperature for ideal cleaning | 最适合的温度 以获得最佳 |
[19:33] | and drying results. | 清洗和烘干效果 |
[19:36] | Where are you going? | 你要去哪 |
[19:37] | You’re gonna miss the rinse cycle. | 你会错过冲洗阶段的 |
[19:39] | I’m not missing anything. | 我什么也没错过 |
[19:42] | Oh, it beeped. Look up “Beep.” | 它发出了”哔”声 查一下什么意思 |