时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:02] | The weekend is dragging. | 周末太漫长了 |
[00:03] | When is it gonna be Monday already? | 什么时候才到周一 |
[00:05] | Jury duty’s the best. | 陪审团义务最棒了 |
[00:06] | Grape-Nuts are delicious. | 葡萄果仁麦片真好吃 |
[00:08] | What? Aren’t we saying things no one has ever said before? | 怎么了 难道我们不是在说从没说过的话 |
[00:11] | Oh, I have one. | 我想到一个 |
[00:12] | “Hey, Mom, Dad, I got an ‘A.'” | 妈 爸 我得了A |
[00:16] | Monday is the start of my first official week of tenure. | 周一将开始我获得终身教职后的第一周 |
[00:18] | Oh, that’s right! Congratulations! | 对 恭喜 |
[00:21] | Best part — I get all these perks, | 最棒的是 我得到了所有福利 |
[00:22] | like a corner office, an assistant, | 大办公室 助理 |
[00:24] | and a key to the executive bathroom. | 行政人员卫生间的钥匙 |
[00:25] | No more waiting to get home to poop! | 不用再等到回家后上大号了 |
[00:27] | I’m so happy for you. | 我真为你高兴 |
[00:29] | Whatcha looking at? | 你在看什么 |
[00:30] | I need a new outfit | 我需要新衣服 |
[00:31] | because Ashley Clark is coming through town, | 因为艾希莉·克拉克会来这里 |
[00:33] | and I’m having breakfast with her on Monday. | 我周一和她吃早餐 |
[00:34] | Who’s Ashley Clark? | 谁是艾希莉·克拉克 |
[00:36] | She used to be my assistant at my old job. | 她是我以前上班时的助理 |
[00:38] | But after I had you, I got so busy, | 但生你后 我太忙 |
[00:39] | she was promoted, and we became co-workers. | 她升职了 我们变成同事 |
[00:42] | And then, after I had Oliver, I went down to part-time, | 我生了奥利弗后 只能做兼职 |
[00:44] | and she became my boss. | 她成为我的上司 |
[00:46] | And then, because of your father’s latex allergy, | 然后 因为你父亲对乳胶过敏 |
[00:48] | we had Anna-Kat, and — | 我们有了安娜凯特 然后 |
[00:50] | Your mom stopped working. | 你妈妈没工作了 |
[00:51] | You’re still working. | 你依然在工作 |
[00:52] | Being a mom is the hardest job of all. | 做母亲是全世界最难的工作 |
[00:54] | Attaboy! | 好样的 |
[00:55] | What’s Ashley up to these days? | 现在艾希莉怎么样 |
[00:57] | She’s still at the company, and past that, I don’t know. | 她还在那家公司 其他我就不知道了 |
[00:59] | But I do know I need to look better than this. | 但我知道我的样子得比现在好看 |
[01:02] | Taylor, fishing for a compliment over here. | 泰勒 我等着表扬呢 |
[01:05] | Would a “You go, girl” Work? | “上吧 妹子”有用吗 |
[01:06] | – Sure. – You go, girl! | -当然 -上吧 妹子 |
[01:10] | Okay, it’s between the pink sweater | 好的 粉色毛衣 |
[01:12] | and the blue sweater. | 和蓝色毛衣中选一件 |
[01:13] | Which one says “I decided to have three kids, | 哪一件能表明 我决定生三个孩子 |
[01:16] | and you got the career I always wanted, | 你拥有我想要的事业 |
[01:18] | but I’m happy with my choice”? | 但我对自己的选择很满意 |
[01:20] | Are you regretting your choice? | 你后悔你的选择吗 |
[01:20] | No. Maybe. | 不 也许 |
[01:22] | Depends on the day. | 要看是哪天 |
[01:23] | Just help me pick out the right sweater. | 帮我选择正确的毛衣 |
[01:25] | You never know. | 谁知道呢 |
[01:26] | It might make all the difference. | 可能让一切事不同 |
[01:28] | Okay, the pink one. | 好的 粉红的 |
[01:40] | Crap! | 见鬼 |
[01:42] | Do I look like a bottle of Pepto-Bismol? | 我看起来像瓶胃药吗 |
[01:43] | You don’t look like Pepto-Bismol. | 你不像胃药 |
[01:45] | Whoa, can you hear me? | 你能听到我说话 |
[01:46] | If you can read my thoughts, | 如果你能听到我的想法 |
[01:47] | sorry about all that dirty stuff with Chris Hemsworth. | 抱歉我对克里斯·海姆斯沃斯各种意淫 |
[01:50] | Don’t worry. You look great. | 别担心 你看起来很漂亮 |
[01:51] | My imaginary affair with Thor continues. | 我和雷神的想象婚外情会继续 |
[02:05] | Just help me pick out the right sweater. | 帮我选择正确的毛衣 |
[02:06] | You never know. | 谁知道呢 |
[02:07] | It might make all the difference. | 可能让一切事不同 |
[02:08] | Okay, then, the blue one. | 好的 蓝色的 |
[02:22] | Stop worrying. You look great. | 别担心 你很漂亮 |
[02:32] | Damn it! | 见鬼 |
[02:35] | This day is gonna be great! | 今天会非常棒 |
[02:38] | This day’s gonna be crap! | 今天一定糟糕透了 |
[02:46] | Mama! | 妈妈 |
[02:50] | What is it, baby? | 什么事 宝贝 |
[02:52] | You made a train out of Legos | 你用乐高搭了辆火车 |
[02:55] | and derailed it. | 然后火车出轨了 |
[02:56] | Yup, the 417 to Fresno. No survivors. | 对 417名去夫勒斯诺的人 全死了 |
[03:00] | Can you help me with my shoe? | 能帮我穿鞋子吗 |
[03:02] | The lace is all knotted. | 鞋带打结了 |
[03:03] | Anna-Kat, how many times have I told you, | 安娜凯特 我跟你说过多少次了 |
[03:06] | you need to take better care of your clothes? | 你需要好好打理你的衣服 |
[03:08] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
[03:09] | 5 times? 500 times? | 5次 500次 |
[03:11] | It all kind of runs together when you speak. | 你说话时全串在一起了 |
[03:14] | You caught me on a good day, | 好在我今天心情好 |
[03:16] | so I am going to show you | 所以我会告诉你 |
[03:17] | how to use an envelope as a shoehorn. | 如果用信封做鞋拔子 |
[03:20] | Is this a life-hack? | 这是生活小窍门吗 |
[03:21] | Because I love life-hacks. | 我爱死生活小窍门了 |
[03:23] | The video where the guy uses his sunglasses… | 有段视频 有个男人用太阳镜 |
[03:26] | …as a phone stand | 作为手机座 |
[03:27] | blew my mind. | 令我大开眼界 |
[03:29] | Take the envelope, stick it in the shoe, | 把信封放进鞋里 |
[03:30] | and then put your foot on the envelope, and… | 把脚顺着信封放进鞋里 然后 |
[03:36] | Not that I ever think you guys are getting divorced… | 我没有想过你们会离婚 |
[03:38] | …but if you do, | 但如果你们离了 |
[03:40] | I want to move in with you. | 我要和你住 |
[03:44] | Realistically, I can’t have her full-time. | 现实中 我没办法全天候应付她 |
[03:48] | Mama! | 妈妈 |
[03:51] | Anna-Kat! | 安娜凯特 |
[03:53] | Don’t leave your stupid Legos on the stupid floor! | 别把愚蠢的乐高散在愚蠢的地板上 |
[03:55] | I can’t put on my shoe because the laces are knotted. | 我拉不上鞋子 因为鞋带打结了 |
[03:58] | – I need help. – ‘m not in the mood for this. | -我需要帮忙 -我没心情 |
[03:59] | What about my shoelaces? | 我的鞋带怎么办 |
[04:01] | What about my life, Anna-Kat?! | 那我的生活呢 安娜凯特 |
[04:03] | What about my life?! | 我的生活呢 |
[04:06] | Not that I think you guys are ever getting divorced, | 我没想过你们要离婚 |
[04:09] | but if you do, I want to live with Dad! | 但如果你们离了 我要和爸爸一起住 |
[04:11] | Good! | 很好 |
[04:22] | Say one word, and you’re spending the night in a closet. | 说一个字 今晚你就待在衣柜里 |
[04:28] | Are you guys ready? I have to drop you off | 准备好了吗 我要送你们上学 |
[04:30] | and meet my friend for breakfast. | 然后和朋友一起吃早餐 |
[04:31] | I’d be ready, but she’s been hogging the bathroom! | 我本来早就好了 但她一直霸着浴室 |
[04:33] | You’re the one hogging the bathroom with your long showers! | 你才霸着浴室 你洗澡洗了那么久 |
[04:35] | I don’t take long showers! | 我洗澡时间很短 |
[04:37] | For skin this smooth, it takes as long as it takes. | 这么光滑的皮肤 要洗多久就洗多久 |
[04:39] | Okay, guys, let’s take a breath. | 好了 放轻松 |
[04:41] | Oliver, your showers are quite long. | 奥利弗 你洗澡时间的确长 |
[04:44] | I mean, there’s just not that much to clean. | 没什么需要洗那么久 |
[04:46] | Let’s pivot to another topic, shall we? | 换个话题好吗 |
[04:48] | Fine. | 好的 |
[04:49] | I am in a good mood, | 我心情好 |
[04:50] | so I’m gonna make you a deal. | 所以我跟你们谈个条件 |
[04:51] | If you two stop fighting for the rest of the day, | 如果你们今天不吵架 |
[04:54] | I’ll give you each 40 bucks. | 我给你们每人40块 |
[04:57] | I love and cherish these moments we have together. | 我珍视我们共同度过的时光 |
[05:00] | I am blessed to have you as my sibling. | 有你这个弟弟是上天保佑我 |
[05:03] | Did you medicate the kids without clearing it with me? | 你没告诉我 就给孩子们吃药了吗 |
[05:05] | Actually, don’t answer. I don’t want to know. | 算了 别回答 我不想知道 |
[05:07] | I need the room. | 我需要厕所 |
[05:11] | Why aren’t you guys ready?! | 你们怎么还没准备好 |
[05:12] | You’re gonna make me late! | 你们会害我迟到 |
[05:13] | I have to meet my friend for breakfast! | 我得和朋友吃早餐 |
[05:15] | I’d be ready, but she’s been hogging the bathroom! | 我本来早就好了 但她一直霸着浴室 |
[05:17] | You’re the one hogging the bathroom with your long showers. | 你才霸着浴室 你洗澡洗了那么久 |
[05:21] | Mom didn’t say anything. She just left. | 妈妈什么都没说 她走了 |
[05:23] | Maybe she’s finally leaving us | 也许她终于要离开我们 |
[05:24] | to go to Mexico to become a surf instructor, | 去墨西哥做冲浪教练 |
[05:26] | like she always threatens. | 就像她一直威胁的那样 |
[05:27] | You two picked the wrong day for this crap! | 你们选错了日子搞事 |
[05:30] | I am forcing you to get along. | 我强迫你们合得来 |
[05:33] | The rest of the morning, you are attached at the wrist. | 今天早上 你们得绑在一起 |
[05:35] | I don’t want him in my selfies! | 我自拍不想拍到他 |
[05:37] | Yeah, and why do you have handcuffs in your bedroom? | 你的浴室里怎么会有手铐 |
[05:39] | It’s from a costume party. Don’t worry about it. | 变装舞会用过的 别担心 |
[05:41] | Hey, guys, what’s going on? | 各位 出什么事了 |
[05:43] | Why are the kids wearing our handcuffs? | 为什么孩子们戴着我们的手铐 |
[05:45] | I mean handcuffs. | 我是说手铐 |
[05:46] | Dad, I think they’re called ham-cuffs. | 爸 我想正确发言是瘦铐 |
[05:48] | – Yeah, ham-cuffs. – Hand-cuffs. | -瘦铐 -手铐 |
[05:51] | Right. Ham-cuffs. | 对 瘦铐 |
[05:57] | It’s Teacher Planning Day again? | 又是老师规划日 |
[05:59] | Why didn’t any of you say something? | 你们为什么什么也没说 |
[06:01] | Guys, are we raising ourselves? | 各位 我们在自己养自己吗 |
[06:04] | Nope! | 不是 |
[06:05] | It’s because you’re the mom. | 因为你是老妈 |
[06:07] | An unscheduled day alone with my kids? | 和孩子们度过未经计划的一天 |
[06:11] | You know what? I’m gonna make the best of it. | 知道吗 我会好好利用 |
[06:13] | I’m gonna turn this pee into lemonade. | 我会把这泡尿变成柠檬水 |
[06:15] | I think that’s the saying. | 应该是这种说法 |
[06:21] | Why are you doing this to me?! | 你为什么这样对我 |
[06:23] | I have an important breakfast! | 我有重要的早餐 |
[06:24] | I can’t be stuck with my kids today! | 我今天不能和孩子们在一起 |
[06:30] | Please don’t tell me the handcuff key | 请别告诉我手铐钥匙 |
[06:32] | was on that key chain. | 在那个钥匙圈上 |
[06:33] | Oh, it was. | 是的 |
[06:35] | You’re happy about that? | 你很开心 |
[06:36] | Yes! At least now we’re all miserable! | 是的 至少现在我们都悲催了 |
[06:41] | Hey, honey. School’s canceled because of | 亲爱的 学校今天不上学 |
[06:44] | stupid, made-up “Teacher Planning Day.” | 因为愚蠢的瞎编的老师规划日 |
[06:46] | Way to knock down public-school teachers. | 说得真好 打击了公立学校的老师 |
[06:47] | Those folks have been riding high too long. | 那些家伙得意太久了 |
[06:49] | Teacher Planning Day is the worst, Greg. | 老师规划日最差劲了 格雷格 |
[06:51] | But I’m making the best of it. | 但我会好好利用 |
[06:52] | I’m bringing the kids with me to meet Ashley. | 我带孩子们一起去见艾希莉 |
[06:54] | How is your first day of tenure going? | 终身教职的第一天怎么样 |
[06:56] | Well, since you asked, | 既然你问到了 |
[06:58] | my new corner office isn’t quite what I pictured. | 我的大办公室和我想象的不一样 |
[07:00] | What’s wrong with it? | 有什么问题 |
[07:01] | It’s small, and three different janitors | 很小 有三位清洁工 |
[07:03] | have come in looking for plungers. | 进来找马桶塞 |
[07:05] | I’m pretty sure, 48 hours ago, this was a supply closet. | 我确信48小时前 这里是杂物间 |
[07:07] | Can’t you just ask for a new office? | 你不能要求新办公室吗 |
[07:08] | It doesn’t work that way. | 规矩不是这样的 |
[07:09] | Office space goes by seniority, | 办公室是论资格的 |
[07:11] | so I have to wait till somebody dies, | 我必须等到有人死 |
[07:12] | which could take a while. | 可能需要很久 |
[07:14] | Professor Bailey is 76, but last year, | 贝利教授76岁了 但去年 |
[07:15] | he competed on “American Ninja Warrior.” | 他参加了”美国忍者战士”大赛 |
[07:17] | He made it up the warped wall and everything. | 连凹墙都上去了 |
[07:19] | What about your new assistant? | 你的新助理呢 |
[07:20] | Bossing someone around must be fun. | 使唤别人一定很有趣 |
[07:23] | I know I’m your assistant, | 我知道我是你的助理 |
[07:25] | but I feel a solid bromance brewing. | 但我感觉到深厚的兄弟情在滋长 |
[07:27] | You know what, the litter box should go in that corner. | 那个小盒子应该放那个角落 |
[07:29] | We’re getting a cat! | 我们要养只猫 |
[07:32] | I feel like I’ve already failed to establish boundaries. | 我感觉在建立界限方面 我已经失败了 |
[07:34] | In a relationship, | 夫妻二人 |
[07:35] | only one of you is allowed to have a bad day. | 只能有一个经历可怕的一天 |
[07:38] | The one that’s having less of a bad day has to step up. | 另一个日子过得不太可怕的得站出来 |
[07:40] | Okay, honey, calm down. | 亲爱的 冷静 |
[07:42] | The kids and I will swing by to cheer you up | 我们和艾希莉吃完早餐后 |
[07:44] | after my breakfast with Ashley. | 我带孩子们去看你 |
[07:46] | This is now a professor’s office. | 现在这是教授的办公室 |
[07:48] | Yeah. | 是 |
[07:50] | Greg, I’m having the worst day. | 格雷格 我经历了人生最可怕的一天 |
[07:52] | How can I make Ashley think things are awesome | 我带着三个生活杀手 |
[07:54] | if I’m dragging around these three life-killers? | 艾希莉怎么会认为我的生活非常好 |
[07:56] | Also, I lost my keys. | 还有 我的车钥匙丢了 |
[07:58] | And to top it all off, | 而且 |
[07:59] | our cabbie is stopping at yellow lights | 我们的出租车司机一看黄灯就停 |
[08:01] | like a total wuss! | 一点用也没有 |
[08:02] | You thought you could stay quiet and keep out of this tornado? | 你以为不出声 就不会被骂 |
[08:05] | Well, you were wrong. | 你错了 |
[08:07] | How’s your first day of tenure going? | 你第一天终身教职怎么样 |
[08:12] | A couple of little hiccups over here, | 有些小困难 |
[08:14] | but your stuff is worse, | 但你的问题更严重 |
[08:15] | so don’t worry about me. | 所以别担心我 |
[08:17] | I’ll come home early and cheer you up. | 我会早点回家为你打气 |
[08:18] | They give you a horn for a reason! | 车上有喇叭是有原因的 |
[08:21] | Hey, Prius, get in the bike lane, where you belong! | 普锐斯 回到属于你的自行车道 |
[08:26] | Sugar for your coffee? | 你咖啡的糖 |
[08:27] | Thanks, bro. | 谢谢你 弟弟 |
[08:28] | Our bond will truly last a lifetime. | 我们的亲情会延续一生 |
[08:31] | How much? | 多少钱 |
[08:33] | 40 bucks apiece. | 一人40块 |
[08:34] | Don’t judge me. | 别鄙视我 |
[08:36] | Mama. I got my juice. | 妈妈 我买了果汁 |
[08:41] | Katie Otto? | 凯蒂·奥图 |
[08:43] | Ashley Clark! | 艾希莉·克拉克 |
[08:46] | It has been way too long! | 太久没见了 |
[08:50] | You look amazing! | 你真漂亮 |
[08:52] | Tell me everything. | 快跟我说说 |
[08:53] | Honestly, Ash, life is great. | 说实话 艾希 生活很美好 |
[08:57] | These are my little angels — | 这是我的小天使们 |
[08:59] | Taylor, Oliver, and Anna-Kat. | 泰勒 奥利弗 安娜凯特 |
[09:02] | Morning. | 早 |
[09:03] | – Pleased to meet you. – Madame. | -很高兴见到你 -女士好 |
[09:05] | Katie, you have a beautiful family, and so polite. | 凯蒂 你有这么漂亮的一家人 而且好有礼貌 |
[09:09] | What’s your secret? | 你的秘方是什么 |
[09:10] | Lots of love. Not money. | 很多的爱 不是钱 |
[09:13] | Mama, I can’t get this open. | 妈妈 我打不开 |
[09:14] | No problem, honey. | 没问题 宝贝 |
[09:20] | Now try. | 现在试试 |
[09:24] | The rubber band helps you grip. | 橡皮筋能让你抓得牢 |
[09:27] | Another life-hack! | 又一个生活小窍门 |
[09:29] | This lady. | 这位女士 |
[09:31] | Oh, my God. | 我的天 |
[09:32] | She’s so cute, she just made my IUD fall out. | 她太可爱了 让我的宫内避孕器都掉了 |
[09:36] | Do you have kids? | 你有孩子吗 |
[09:37] | No, no, I never settled down. | 没有 我没有结婚 |
[09:39] | I’m always traveling for work. | 我总是出公差 |
[09:41] | It’s all your fault, you know. | 这全是你的错 |
[09:43] | When you left the company, | 你离开公司后 |
[09:45] | I started climbing the ladder, and I never stopped. | 我就开始向上爬 从没停下 |
[09:48] | I have a boat that I never go out on. | 我有条船 从来没用过 |
[09:50] | Pier fees are killing me. | 码头费贵死了 |
[09:51] | And — | 还有 |
[09:52] | Oh, come on! | 不是吧 |
[09:54] | I just bought this suit! | 我刚买的套装 |
[09:58] | That was so sad. | 太可怜了 |
[10:00] | Totally. | 是啊 |
[10:02] | Pier fees are getting out of control. | 码头费越来越离谱 |
[10:07] | – Stop it! – No, you stop it! | -停下 -你停下 |
[10:09] | Why would you agree to meet her on Teacher Planning Day | 你为什么同意在老师规划日 |
[10:11] | wearing a shredded sweater? | 穿着破毛衣见她 |
[10:12] | Angela, so help me, I will | 安吉拉 老天为证 |
[10:13] | smash this tiny jam jar on your forehead. | 我会把这罐果酱砸你额头上 |
[10:15] | Jam her! Jam her! Jam her! | 砸她 砸她 砸她 |
[10:18] | Mom, tell Oliver to stop it. | 妈 让奥利弗停下 |
[10:20] | What are you fighting about now? | 你们又在吵什么 |
[10:22] | I want to drink my coffee, but Oliver won’t budge. | 我想喝咖啡 但奥利弗不动 |
[10:24] | Taylor, use your other hand. | 泰勒 用另一只手 |
[10:30] | Why didn’t you tell me that? | 你为什么没告诉我 |
[10:33] | Cut it out! | 别这样 |
[10:34] | Okay, fine. You can have it. | 好 给你吃 |
[10:36] | I promise I won’t jerk my hand this time. | 我保证这次我这只手不会捣乱 |
[10:41] | Bitch. | 贱人 |
[10:42] | Mama, I got my juice. | 妈妈 我买了果汁 |
[10:46] | What the hell, Anna-Kat?! | 你做什么 安娜凯特 |
[10:49] | I tripped on my shoelace because you wouldn’t help me! | 我被鞋带绊倒了 因为你不肯帮我 |
[10:51] | You ruined my sweater! | 你毁了我的毛衣 |
[10:53] | And you ruined my first-grade diorama. | 你毁了我一年级时做的立体模型 |
[10:55] | That’s right. I forget nothing. | 没错 我什么都记得 |
[10:58] | Katie Otto? | 凯蒂·奥图 |
[11:00] | Hide the handcuffs or die. | 不把手铐藏起来就死 |
[11:02] | Ashley Clark! | 艾希莉·克拉克 |
[11:04] | Keep an eye on things. | 注意情况 |
[11:05] | If it goes bad, get me out of here. | 恶化了就带我离开 |
[11:09] | It has been way too long! | 好久不见 |
[11:11] | Look at you. | 瞧你 |
[11:13] | Oh, I would totally hug, but this is a new suit, so… | 我也想拥抱 但这是新套装 |
[11:17] | So, Katie. | 凯蒂 |
[11:18] | Tell me everything. | 跟我说说 |
[11:20] | Well… | 好的 |
[11:22] | Honestly, Ash, life is great. | 说实话 艾希 生活很美好 |
[11:25] | But earlier, you said you hate your horrible, stupid life. | 但之前 你说你讨厌你可怕愚蠢的生活 |
[11:28] | She’s playing opposite day right now. | 她在玩说反话 |
[11:29] | No, I’m not. | 我没有 |
[11:30] | The girl’s consistent. | 这姑娘很固执 |
[11:31] | So, are those your other two? | 这是你另外两个孩子 |
[11:33] | I have to go to the bathroom. | 我得去上厕所 |
[11:36] | I’m not watching you pee! | 我不会看你小便 |
[11:38] | It’s either pee in there or pee out here. | 不在里面尿就是在这里尿 |
[11:39] | Your choice! | 你自己选 |
[11:43] | No. The other two are out feeding the homeless. | 不 另两个孩子出去给流浪汉送餐了 |
[11:47] | Mom, he’s trying to make me watch him pee! | 妈 他逼着我看他小便 |
[11:49] | There they are. | 他们在那里 |
[11:51] | Are they… handcuffed together? | 他们被手铐铐在一起吗 |
[11:54] | So, what about you? | 你呢 |
[11:57] | Are you married? Do you have kids? | 结婚了吗 有孩子吗 |
[11:59] | No, I have a boat and lovers. | 没有 我有条船 还有很多情人 |
[12:01] | I have a minivan and Greg. | 我有辆小厢式车 还有格雷格 |
[12:04] | So, how long are you in town for? | 你在这里待多久 |
[12:05] | Well, I’m in Westport till Wednesday | 我在西港待到周三 |
[12:07] | to pitch to Martha Stewart. | 给玛莎·斯图尔特做推介 |
[12:08] | And then I go to New York to do a TED Talk. | 然后去纽约做演讲 |
[12:11] | That sounds amazing. | 听起来太棒了 |
[12:13] | To be honest, Katie, I owe it all to you. | 说实话 凯蒂 这都多亏了你 |
[12:15] | How so? | 怎么说 |
[12:17] | You were the one in line for all those promotions. | 本来要升职的人是你 |
[12:19] | I mean, just think, | 想想看 |
[12:20] | if you didn’t have these three… | 如果你没生这三个孩子 |
[12:22] | …you’d be me. | 你就会是我 |
[12:25] | Can you imagine? | 你能想象吗 |
[12:27] | That is so funny! | 真好笑 |
[12:29] | Uh, should we jump in? | 我们要插嘴吗 |
[12:31] | No. I think we already missed our moment. | 不 已经错过时机了 |
[12:33] | We should probably leave. | 我们还是走吧 |
[12:34] | Yeah, but then Katie will be stuck with the check. | 那得由凯蒂买单 |
[12:36] | So? She’s already gonna be pissed at us. | 怎样 她反正会生我们的气 |
[12:38] | Good point. Let’s bounce. | 说得好 走 |
[12:42] | I knew you were in a bad mood, so I brought you | 我知道你心情不好 所以我给你带回来了 |
[12:44] | People Magazine’s Crossword Puzzle Book. | 人物杂志的填字谜书 |
[12:45] | It always helps your self-esteem. | 总是能帮助你恢复自信 |
[12:47] | Damn right it does. I could do it in ink. | 太对了 我可以直接用钢笔填 |
[12:48] | – What happened here? – Can’t. | -出了什么事 -不想说 |
[12:51] | You’ve got the kids. | 你照看孩子 |
[12:52] | I’m going upstairs | 我上楼 |
[12:53] | to imagine our children are a 27-foot catamaran. | 想象我们的孩子是27英尺的游艇 |
[13:10] | I think I’m having a mid-life crisis. | 我想我正经历中年危机 |
[13:13] | My life is awesome! | 我的生活太棒了 |
[13:15] | My life sucks! | 我的生活太失败了 |
[13:23] | Did your breakfast date really go that badly? | 早餐见面真的那么糟 |
[13:25] | It was a disaster. | 那是一场灾难 |
[13:28] | Ashley is a big CEO who travels the world. | 艾希莉是总裁 环游世界 |
[13:31] | She’s a success, | 她是成功者 |
[13:33] | and I missed my opportunity to become a success, too. | 而我失去了成功的机会 |
[13:37] | Katie, you are a success. | 凯蒂 你是成功者 |
[13:39] | Your opinion doesn’t matter. | 你的看法根本不重要 |
[13:40] | You think I’m sexy after I eat a Bloomin’ Onion. | 我吃了洋葱花球后你都会觉得我性感 |
[13:42] | Well, I love you. | 我爱你 |
[13:44] | And the way you look in that Outback Steakhouse lighting, | 你在牛排餐厅灯光下的样子 |
[13:46] | come on, I’m only human. | 拜托 我只是普通人 |
[13:49] | I’m trying to feel sorry for myself. | 我正为自己感到可怜呢 |
[13:52] | So if you can’t get onboard with the pity party, get out. | 如果你不能同情我 你就出去 |
[13:55] | How can I help? | 我能怎么帮你 |
[13:57] | Build a time machine and a tolerance to latex. | 造架时空机 接受乳胶 |
[14:05] | It seems only fair that the person | 右手戴着手铐的人 |
[14:07] | who has the handcuff on their right hand loses their thumb. | 失去拇指才公平 |
[14:09] | – Anna-Kat, chop-chop. – n it. | -安娜凯特 快 -马上来 |
[14:11] | No one’s losing their thumb, Anna-Kat. | 没人失去拇指 安娜凯特 |
[14:13] | Okay, Mom’s having a bad day, and so am I. | 妈妈今天很不顺 我也一样 |
[14:15] | But I’m not allowed to have my bad day | 但我在解决她的问题前 |
[14:17] | until I first fix her bad day. | 不能哀叹我的倒霉 |
[14:18] | And you’re gonna help me. | 你们要帮我 |
[14:19] | How are we supposed to do that with these things on? | 我们戴着这个怎么做 |
[14:21] | Anna-Kat, I need to borrow a bobby pin. | 安娜凯特 借我一个发夹 |
[14:25] | That’s it. There we go. | 好了 |
[14:28] | Wow, Dad. Where’d you learn to do that? | 爸 你在哪里学的 |
[14:30] | I figured it out one night when your mom and I… | 有晚我学会的 你妈和我… |
[14:33] | YouTube. | 网上学的 |
[14:38] | We have guests! | 我们有客人 |
[14:40] | I knew you were in a bad mood, | 我知道你心情不好 |
[14:42] | so we brought you some unsalted nuts. | 所以我给你带了不加盐的坚果 |
[14:45] | Because they’re your favorite, | 因为这是你的最爱 |
[14:46] | and your happiness is important to us. | 你的快乐对我们很重要 |
[14:48] | How much are you paying them? | 你给了他们多少钱 |
[14:49] | – We’re up to $60. – What is he doing? | -加到60了 -他做什么 |
[14:52] | He’s in a highly competitive charades league. | 他在竞争激烈的你比我猜联盟 |
[14:53] | He likes to practice in his free time. | 他喜欢在空闲时练习 |
[14:56] | – “Jurassic Park”! – Nailed it! | -《侏罗纪公园》 -对了 |
[14:58] | You know, I used to be lonely. | 我以前总是很孤单 |
[15:00] | Now I have all of you. My new family. | 现在我有你们 我的新家人 |
[15:02] | Now I have a place to go for Christmas! | 现在我有地方过圣诞了 |
[15:06] | I need some air. | 我需要点空气 |
[15:09] | So your office is a little claustrophobic. | 你的办公室带来幽闭恐惧症的感觉 |
[15:13] | You always love getting MRIs. | 你一直喜欢做核磁共振 |
[15:14] | I worked so hard for tenure, and now that I have it, | 我那么努力拿到终身教职 现在拿到了 |
[15:16] | I feel like I’m starting at the bottom all over again. | 我感觉一切又从头开始 |
[15:19] | And I built up the executive washroom in my head too much. | 我在脑海中对行政洗手间的期待太高了 |
[15:22] | Like, it’s fine. | 还行 |
[15:23] | There are these fancy soaps that are not candy. | 有高级香皂 没有糖果 |
[15:26] | Right. | 对 |
[15:29] | I’m gonna take a walk. | 我去散步 |
[15:35] | Precious, Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire.” | 《珍爱》 根据萨菲尔的小说《推》改编 |
[15:38] | Yes! I’m so good! | 我太厉害了 |
[15:40] | We need to find a way to lift your dad’s spirits. | 我们要找个办法鼓舞你们爸爸的士气 |
[15:43] | I’m in. | 我加入 |
[15:44] | Taylor? Oliver? | 泰勒 奥利弗 |
[15:45] | – How much? – How much? | -多少钱 -多少钱 |
[15:47] | You want to get paid to help your father? | 帮助父亲还收钱 |
[15:49] | He’s the greatest man I have ever known. | 他是我认识的最伟大的人 |
[15:51] | When you get a chance to help him, | 你有机会帮助他时 |
[15:53] | you seize the opportunity. | 你要抓牢机会 |
[15:54] | I had a chance like that once, and I let it slip away. | 我有过这样的机会 我却让机会溜走了 |
[15:57] | Oakland. Summer of ’98. | 奥克兰 98年夏天 |
[16:00] | Black smoke fills my childhood bedroom. | 我童年的卧室充满浓烟 |
[16:03] | And where there’s smoke… | 有烟的地方 |
[16:05] | there’s fire. | 就有火 |
[16:06] | “Grant! | 格兰特 |
[16:08] | Your stepfather’s trapped upstairs!” | 你的继父被困在楼上了 |
[16:11] | “I’m on it!” | 我这就来 |
[16:12] | But the flames. There’s flames everywhere. | 但是火 到处都是火 |
[16:15] | “Mama, I can’t! The flames are in the way! | 妈妈 我不行 我被火挡住了 |
[16:18] | Mama, the flames are stopping me!” | 妈妈 有火我过不去 |
[16:20] | Inspirational story, Grant, | 鼓舞人心的故事 格兰特 |
[16:22] | but I got this. | 但我有办法 |
[16:24] | Taylor, Oliver, I should have never gone easy on you two. | 泰勒 奥利弗 我根本不应该对你们手软 |
[16:28] | You are gonna stop being selfish and help me cheer him up. | 你们不能再自私 帮我给他打气 |
[16:32] | Come on. | 来 |
[16:33] | Let’s go. | 我们走 |
[16:37] | You got to tell me how that story ends. | 你必须告诉我故事的结局 |
[16:40] | now Daddy gets jumpy at barbecues. | 现在爸爸一看到烤肉就紧张 |
[16:44] | “Honey, I ‘Blanked’ the Kids.” | 亲爱的 我 横线 孩子 |
[16:47] | Sold? Abandoned? Misplaced? | 卖 抛弃 放错位置 |
[16:50] | Katie. | 凯蒂 |
[16:51] | I’ll come back to it. | 等下接着想 |
[16:52] | Go away. I’m wallowing. | 走开 我正烦着呢 |
[16:54] | Ashley Clark’s life is a fraud! | 艾希莉·克拉克的生活是假的 |
[16:55] | At Stewart and Kingston’s, | 在斯金店时 |
[16:56] | Ashley kept bragging how awesome her life was. | 艾希莉一直吹嘘她的生活有多棒 |
[16:59] | So much so, it seemed suspicious. | 太过了 很可疑 |
[17:01] | So we took a deep dive into her social media | 所以我们在社交媒体上使劲挖 |
[17:03] | and found this. | 找到了这个 |
[17:04] | You come in here just to show me her perfect fruit salad? | 你们来给我看她完美的水果沙拉 |
[17:07] | It’s all berries and mango. | 全是浆果和芒果 |
[17:08] | None of that honeydew garbage. | 没有瓜类垃圾 |
[17:10] | No. Look across from Ashley Clark’s food. | 不 看向艾希莉食物的对面 |
[17:12] | There’s no other place setting. | 根本没人 |
[17:14] | There’s hundreds of pics just like this. | 有数百张这样的照片 |
[17:16] | In all of them, she’s eating alone. | 全部照片中 她都是一个人吃饭 |
[17:17] | She is? Let me see that. | 是吗 我来看看 |
[17:19] | And she’s on four different dating sites. | 她上了四个约会网站 |
[17:21] | – All active. – No. | -都很活跃 -不 |
[17:23] | Are you sure? | 你们确定 |
[17:24] | We went on one of those background-check sites | 我们上了调查背景的网站 |
[17:26] | and found more good news. | 找到了更多好消息 |
[17:28] | She was arrested for public intoxication in ’08. | 她在08年因为公众场合酗酒被捕 |
[17:31] | So, doesn’t the fact that Ashley regrets her life choices | 艾希莉后悔自己的人生选择 |
[17:34] | make you feel better? | 让你好受些了吗 |
[17:35] | A little. | 有点 |
[17:36] | But not as much as the fact | 但最让我好受的是 |
[17:38] | that you guys rallied to cheer me up. | 你们团结起来给我打气 |
[17:41] | So, you’re in a better mood? | 你心情好些了 |
[17:42] | Yes. | 是的 |
[17:44] | Great. Now I can wallow. | 很好 现在我可以烦了 |
[17:47] | This bed is bigger than my office. | 这张床比我的办公室还大 |
[17:55] | What are you doing out here? | 你在这里做什么 |
[17:57] | Go on in. | 进去 |
[18:10] | Wow, it looks so much better in here. | 这里看起来好多了 |
[18:12] | I printed some family pictures online | 我打印了网上的家庭照片 |
[18:14] | and made a collage. | 做了拼贴画 |
[18:15] | I convinced Grant to put his desk in the hallway. | 我说服格兰特把他的桌子放在走廊 |
[18:18] | He’s already in here! | 他已经来了 |
[18:19] | And I lit a vanilla candle | 我点燃了香草蜡烛 |
[18:21] | to offset that pukey, moppy smell. | 赶走令人恶心的拖把味道 |
[18:23] | So, what do you think? | 那么 你觉得怎么样 |
[18:26] | I love it. | 我好喜欢 |
[18:28] | But I’m not sure this small office can fit so much joy. | 但不确定这么小的办公室可以装下这么多的快乐 |
[18:30] | I hear a lot of love in there! | 我听到了很多爱 |
[18:31] | And Grant helped, too. | 格兰特也帮忙了 |
[18:33] | Would it be a huge mistake to invite him for dinner? | 邀请他吃晚餐会是天大的错误吗 |
[18:36] | Yes, definitely. | 绝对是 |
[18:37] | Guys, my ears are burning! | 各位 我的耳朵烧起来了 |
[18:39] | Ha! Oh, my God, I sound just like my dad! | 我的天 我听起来真像我爸 |
[18:47] | Oh, thanks for inviting me over. | 感谢你们邀请我 |
[18:49] | When you’re part of the family, everyone’s in it together. | 当你拥有家庭时 家人是团结在一起的 |
[18:52] | When someone else is having a bad day, | 当有人度过倒霉的一天时 |
[18:54] | it’s your job to lift their spirits. | 鼓舞他们的士气是你的工作 |
[18:58] | Thank you so much for inviting me! | 非常感谢你邀请我 |
[19:01] | And when you’re having a bad day, | 当你度过倒霉的一天时 |
[19:04] | you can rely on your family to lift you up. | 可以依靠家人为你打气 |
[19:06] | Having people who care about you | 拥有关心你的人 |
[19:08] | is way more important than being the CEO of some company. | 比做什么公司的总裁重要多了 |
[19:11] | Why are you still wearing that sweater? | 你为什么还穿着这件毛衣 |
[19:13] | I paid for overnight shipping. | 我付了加急运费 |
[19:14] | I’m gonna be buried in this thing. | 我下葬的时候都要穿着它 |
[19:20] | Just help me pick out the right sweater. | 帮我选择正确的毛衣 |
[19:22] | You never know. | 谁知道呢 |
[19:23] | It might make all the difference. | 可能让一切事不同 |
[19:25] | Okay, then… | 好吧 那么 |
[19:26] | Uh, forget the sweaters. | 别管毛衣 |
[19:27] | I like the green jacket. | 我喜欢绿色外套 |
[19:38] | Ohh. You look good. | 真漂亮 |
[19:40] | Thank you! | 谢谢 |
[19:41] | Tell you what. Instead of meeting Ashley… | 告诉你 与其与艾希莉见面 |
[19:46] | I’ve got a better idea. | 我有更好的主意 |
[19:48] | I’ll cancel my breakfast. | 我会取消早餐 |
[19:57] | I never should have gone with the green jacket. | 我根本不应该买绿色外套 |
[20:06] | You never know. It might make all the difference. | 谁知道呢 可能让一切事不同 |
[20:12] | I’ll just find something on the floor of my closet. | 我在衣柜底下找件衣服算了 |