时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:03] | Boone’s murdered 13 people. | 布恩已经杀了十三个人了 |
[00:05] | There were two babies. | 当时有两个婴儿 |
[00:06] | Twins– a boy and a girl. | 龙凤胎 一男一女 |
[00:08] | Your commitment to revenge | 你对复仇的忠诚 |
[00:09] | is clearly greater than your brother’s was. | 果然比你哥哥多些 |
[00:12] | I’ll be going to the Hamptons for Thanksgiving | 要去汉普顿过雷德威尔家族 |
[00:14] | with the Radwells. I’m pregnant! | 感恩节的人是我 我怀孕了 |
[00:27] | Hey, Chanel? | 香奈儿 |
[00:28] | Listen. I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, | 听我说 我不想让你误会 |
[00:30] | but I don’t think I can bone you right now. | 但我现在不能上你 |
[00:33] | My wanger is way stressed out. | 我的老二过度受惊了 |
[00:34] | I got a kid on the way | 我要有孩子了 |
[00:35] | with a crazy neck-braced baby mama who I now gotta marry | 必须娶的孩子他妈带超难看的项圈 |
[00:37] | and be miserable for the rest of my life. | 所以我后半生都要在痛苦中度过了 |
[00:39] | You don’t have to marry that psycho cow Hester, | 你不用娶海丝特那个疯婆子了 |
[00:41] | because you don’t have a baby on the way… | 因为她肚子里没有你的孩子 |
[00:43] | If you know what I mean. | 如果你知道我在说什么的话 |
[00:45] | No, I-I don’t know what you mean. | 不 我不知道你在说什么 |
[00:47] | I have killed for love, Chad. | 我为爱情杀了人 查德 |
[00:48] | I’ve killed for our love. | 为了我们的爱情 |
[00:50] | Wh… What? | 你说什么 |
[00:50] | Chad, Hester was never pregnant. | 查德 海丝特根本没怀孕 |
[00:52] | She just said that so you’d invite her to Thanksgiving | 她那么说只是想让你邀请她去汉普顿 |
[00:54] | with your family in the Hamptons. | 和你的家人过感恩节罢了 |
[00:56] | But then | 但是后来 |
[00:57] | she had a little accident on the stairs. | 她在楼梯上发生了个小意外 |
[00:59] | A what? | 什么 |
[01:00] | Wait, are-are you saying you killed Hester? | 等等 你是说你杀了海丝特 |
[01:02] | Gravity killed Hester. | 是重力害死了海丝特 |
[01:04] | I just gave her a little push. | 我只是推了她一小把 |
[01:06] | Hester can’t come between us anymore, Chad. | 海丝特不会再妨碍我们了 查德 |
[01:08] | You and I can pick up right where we left off. | 之前被迫中止的事情可以继续了 |
[01:09] | You can bring me home for Thanksgiving | 你可以带我回家过感恩节 |
[01:11] | and introduce me to my future in-laws. | 把我介绍给我未来的公公婆婆 |
[01:13] | Hold on. | 等等 |
[01:15] | What did you do with the body? | 她的尸体你怎么处理的 |
[01:16] | Duh. I put it in the meat locker. | 我把尸体放在冷冻室了 |
[01:18] | It’s where we’ve been putting all the dead bodies. | 我们不是一直都把尸体放那吗 |
[01:20] | Oh, my God. | 我的天呐 |
[01:23] | Chanel, that is so hot. | 香奈儿 这太让人起性致了 |
[01:26] | I want to see it. | 我想去看看 |
[01:27] | I need to see the body. | 我想去见见那具尸体 |
[01:28] | Look, we can have a three-way with the body. | 我们可以跟尸体来个三人行 |
[01:30] | What? No! | 什么 不行 |
[01:31] | Oh, come on, I need this! | 别这样 我很想来一次 |
[01:33] | If you expect me to take our relationship to the next level | 如果你想让我带你回汉普顿过感恩节 |
[01:36] | by taking you home to the Hamptons for Thanksgiving, | 好让我们的关系更进一步的话 |
[01:37] | you’re going to have to prove to me you can meet my needs. | 你得证明你能满足我的需求 |
[01:39] | Ugh, fine! I’ll show you the body, | 好吧 我带你去看尸体 |
[01:41] | but not so you can have sex with it. | 但你不能和它做爱 |
[01:44] | I’ll show it to you | 我带你去看 |
[01:45] | so that you and I will share a dangerous secret | 这样你就能和我一同分享这个危险的秘密 |
[01:47] | that will strengthen our relationship | 能够稳定我们的关系 |
[01:49] | and bring us closer together. | 也能增进我们的距离 |
[01:58] | No frigging way. Where is she? | 不可能 她去哪儿了 |
[02:00] | I don’t understand how this keeps happening! | 我不明白为什么老是发生这样的事 |
[02:02] | Is this meat locker, like, a wormhole | 这个冷冻室 难道想虫洞一样 |
[02:04] | to an alternate universe or something? | 能通向一个平行宇宙还是怎么回事 |
[02:05] | Okay, Chanel, you gotta relax. | 好了香奈儿 别紧张 |
[02:07] | Believe me, no one’s more disappointed | 相信我 发现海丝特火辣的尸体不在这 |
[02:09] | that Hester’s hot dead bod isn’t in here. | 没有人会比我更失望了 |
[02:11] | Listen. I’m not a detective or anything, | 听着 我不是侦探 |
[02:13] | but what if Hester was never dead | 但如果海丝特没死 |
[02:15] | and she just managed to escape? | 而是逃跑了呢 |
[02:16] | That’s not possible! | 这不可能 |
[02:17] | I watched her fall down the stairs! | 我亲眼看着她掉下了楼梯 |
[02:19] | After she fell down the stairs, did you check her pulse? | 那她摔下楼梯后 你检查她的脉搏了吗 |
[02:22] | No, Chad, because I’m not, like, a registered nurse. | 没有查德 因为我又不是护士 |
[02:24] | Well, Chanel, it seems to me | 香奈儿 在我看来 |
[02:26] | like you tried to kill Hester and totally failed. | 是你想要杀死海丝特 但失败了 |
[02:28] | So you should probably bring | 所以去汉普顿的时候 |
[02:29] | a security detail with you | 你最好带个保镖 |
[02:30] | to the Hamptons because… the girl’s insane. | 因为那姑娘是个疯子 |
[02:32] | She’ll probably stop at nothing | 在杀死你 复仇成功前 |
[02:33] | until she gets her revenge by murdering you. | 我猜她是不会罢休的 |
[02:43] | No offense, | 没有冒犯之意 |
[02:44] | but this is not how I wanted to spend the holidays. | 但我真不想这样过节 |
[02:47] | I should be watching the Macy’s Parade | 我应该在看”梅西感恩节游行” |
[02:49] | and making decorative hand turkeys with my boyfriend, Wes, | 和我的男朋友韦斯一起制作手工火鸡 |
[02:53] | instead of spending Thanksgiving all single | 而不是孤单地过感恩节 |
[02:56] | and watching the dumb parade with you. | 跟你一起看那个蠢爆的游行 |
[02:59] | Still, I do appreciate you keeping me company. | 不过 我还是很感激有你陪着我 |
[03:03] | No one wants to spend | 没人想度过一个 |
[03:04] | a room service Thanksgiving alone. | 独自一人叫客房服务的感恩节 |
[03:10] | Are you going to talk at all? | 你打算说句话吗 |
[03:17] | Look, I get it. | 听着 我理解你 |
[03:18] | You’re bummed we had to murder your brother. | 我们杀死了你哥哥 你很不爽 |
[03:20] | But honestly? | 但是说真的 |
[03:21] | You shouldn’t be mad at me. | 你不该生我的气 |
[03:23] | Boone was out of control. | 布恩已经失控了 |
[03:25] | I mean, between the three of us? | 在我们三个之间 |
[03:27] | We’re the sane ones. | 我们才是正常的人 |
[03:30] | He just screwed up that entire operation. | 整个计划都被他毁了 |
[03:33] | God… | 老天 |
[03:36] | Oh. Room service Thanksgiving. | 感恩节客房服务来了 |
[03:39] | Yes! | 太棒了 |
[03:48] | Roasted quail and a side of stuffing | 烤鹌鹑和蘸料 |
[03:50] | and a cranberry juice. | 还有蔓越橘汁 |
[03:52] | Oh, I had asked for an electric serrated carving knife. | 我还要了一把电动切肉刀 |
[03:55] | Just wouldn’t be Thanksgiving | 要是没有电动刀具 |
[03:56] | without the whir of a small motor | 切肉时发出的嗡嗡声 |
[03:59] | – cutting through flesh! – Yeah. | -感恩节就不像感恩节了 -当然 |
[04:03] | Here you go. | 给你 |
[04:05] | Yeah. | 太棒了 |
[04:09] | Now, I know you’ve got other plans today, | 我知道你今天有其他的计划 |
[04:13] | and for alibi’s sake we need to protect your cover, | 考虑到不在场证明 我们得保证你不暴露 |
[04:16] | but I am not letting you leave | 但是我不会让你 |
[04:18] | on an empty stomach. | 胃里空空的离开的 |
[04:20] | I hope you’re hungry, because I ordered | 希望你饿了 因为我点了菜单上 |
[04:22] | the closest thing the menu had | 最接近传统 |
[04:24] | to a traditional thanksgiving dinner. | 感恩节晚餐的食物 |
[04:31] | Is that what quail is? | 这是鹌鹑吗 |
[04:33] | I thought they were bigger. | 还以为会大点呢 |
[04:37] | Nope. | 没 |
[04:38] | You know what I was picturing? Pheasant. | 你知道我预想的是什么吗 野鸡 |
[04:40] | Yeah. | 没错 |
[04:41] | All right, little birdie! | 好了 小小鸟 |
[04:43] | Time to slice off those breasts. | 该切脯肉了 |
[04:49] | Real quick: | 再废话一下 |
[04:50] | I just wanted to thank you for spending this hour with me. | 我想谢谢你在此刻伴我左右 |
[04:54] | I feel like this holiday is | 我觉得这个节日 |
[04:56] | all about family, | 就是庆祝家庭的 |
[04:57] | and, well, as you know, | 你也知道 |
[04:59] | I gave up on my real family a long time ago. | 我很久之前就抛弃了我真正的家庭 |
[05:03] | I mean, at this point, | 我想说 此时此刻 |
[05:05] | the closest thing I have to family is… | 最能给我家的感觉的就是… |
[05:08] | you. | 你 |
[05:11] | So… | 那… |
[05:14] | how about you do the honors? | 不如你来完成这份光荣使命吧 |
[05:40] | I understand that thanksgiving | 我很理解感恩节 |
[05:42] | is supposed to be about family and being together | 是庆祝家庭 家人团聚 |
[05:44] | and thanking god that we were born rich in America | 感恩上帝我们出生在富饶的美利坚 |
[05:46] | and not in Uganda or Venezuela | 而不是乌干达或是委内瑞拉 |
[05:48] | or any of those other african countries. | 以及其他非洲国家 |
[05:50] | But modern Thanksgiving, at least in the Swenson family, | 然而现代感恩节 至少斯旺森家族感恩节 |
[05:53] | is basically a tinder date. | 基本上就是约炮日 |
[05:54] | It looks so good at first. | 起先一切美妙 |
[05:57] | Inviting, | 引人入胜 |
[05:58] | the possibility of a real connection, | 还有产生真正联系的可能性 |
[06:00] | but when you actually arrive at Swenson Thanksgiving’s door, | 可当你来到感恩节斯旺森家的大门时 |
[06:03] | the whole thing is just fat | 整件事都看起来油腻无比 |
[06:05] | and upsetting and disappointing. | 令人沮丧失望 |
[06:07] | But since you came all this way, | 可既然你来都来了 |
[06:09] | you figure you might as well go through with it, | 你就会想咬牙坚持一下就好 |
[06:10] | even though you know when you’re done, | 就算你知道完事之后 |
[06:12] | you’re probably going to hate yourself. | 你也很可能厌恶自己 |
[06:15] | Hello! | 你来啦 |
[06:18] | Hi, sweetheart! | 亲爱的 |
[06:21] | How you doing? | 你还好吗 |
[06:22] | – The whole serial killer thing is really… Listen. | -那个连坏杀人案真是太… -听好了 |
[06:24] | Your “Dad” started in drinking early this morning, | 你爸听说杰伊·卡特勒 |
[06:28] | when he found out that Jay Cutler’s | 今天加入芝加哥熊队的事后 |
[06:30] | starting for the Bears today. | 一大早就喝得醉醺醺的 |
[06:31] | So try not to make eye contact. | 尽量别和他有眼神接触 |
[06:33] | We don’t want another Thanksgiving 2008 incident again. | 不想再像08年的感恩节那样出意外了 |
[06:37] | Freddy was the one who went and got grandpa’s old pistols | 是弗雷迪偷拿爷爷的枪又跑出去的 |
[06:39] | and challenged me to a duel. | 还吵着要和我决斗 |
[06:40] | I know, darling. | 我知道 亲爱的 |
[06:41] | But your father loves your brother | 可比起你 你爸偏爱你弟 |
[06:43] | much more than he loves you, | 可不是一点半点 |
[06:44] | So if we are gonna keep the peace, | 如果咱们想安稳过节 |
[06:46] | you’re just gonna have | 你只好把一切黑锅 |
[06:47] | to take the blame for everything. | 都背在身上了 |
[06:48] | Now, come on, we’re just sitting down to eat. | 来吧 我们已经坐好准备开饭了 |
[06:50] | Look who’s here! | 看看谁来了 |
[06:59] | You’re late. The game’s just about to start. | 你来迟了 比赛都开始了 |
[07:01] | And now, you get to sit in the back row with the help! | 所以你得和佣人一起坐后面 |
[07:04] | Screw you, Freddy. Daddy, I want to sit with you. | 滚你丫的 弗雷迪 爸 我想坐你旁边 |
[07:07] | We haven’t seen each other in months. | 我们都几个月没见了 |
[07:09] | On every box of Swenson frozen food | 在每一盒斯旺森速冻餐的背面 |
[07:11] | is a set of instructions. | 都印着食用说明 |
[07:13] | It says how long you need to microwave | 写着你得用微波驴加热多久 |
[07:16] | the mega-cheesy mac and cheese hearty dinner | 巨无霸芝士汉堡和通心粉奶酪晚餐 |
[07:18] | and the Italian style chicken cacciatore. | 还有意式红烩鸡 |
[07:20] | What do you think would happen | 如果食用说明有误 |
[07:22] | if those instructions were incorrect? | 你猜会怎么着 |
[07:24] | The damn food | 那些烂食物 |
[07:25] | would either still be frozen | 要么就是没解冻 |
[07:27] | or completely overcooked. | 要么就会加热过头了 |
[07:28] | This family’s fortune | 我们家的财富 |
[07:29] | is built on being right on time. | 正建立在守时之上 |
[07:33] | You’re late! | 你迟到了 |
[07:34] | Sit your ass in the back with… Margarita. | 乖乖坐后面…跟玛格丽塔一起 |
[08:08] | I’m leaving! | 我要走了 |
[08:10] | Honey! But you didn’t even touch your peas | 亲爱的 你连豌豆或者 |
[08:13] | or your tiny carrot squares. | 还有萝卜丁都没吃呢 |
[08:14] | Do you want me to defrost | 你要我去加热点 |
[08:16] | some lasagna or salisbury steak? | 烤宽面条或梳士巴利汉堡扒吗 |
[08:18] | I don’t want you to defrost anything. | 什么都不用加热 |
[08:20] | I hate defrosted food. | 我恨透速冻食品了 |
[08:23] | Why is it called Italian style chicken cacciatore? | 为什么要叫意式红烩鸡 |
[08:26] | All chicken cacciatore is Italian style. | 红烩鸡就是意式的啊 |
[08:30] | This is not what Thanksgiving is supposed to be. | 感恩节不该这样过 |
[08:32] | Thanksgiving is about tradition. | 感恩节是以传统为重 |
[08:34] | This is the Swenson tradition. | 这就是斯旺森家的传统 |
[08:35] | That doesn’t bother any of you? | 你们不烦吗 |
[08:37] | That our family tradition demands TV trays? | 咱家的传统居然需要电视餐 |
[08:39] | There is a killer on the loose in my sorority house. | 有个杀人狂仍在我姐妹会附近晃悠 |
[08:41] | A bunch of my sort-of friends have been killed | 我一堆朋友都被杀了 |
[08:42] | and no one has asked me about it. | 你们居然都不问我这事 |
[08:44] | I-I’ve had it. | 我受够了 |
[08:46] | I’m out, people. | 你们尽兴吧 |
[08:48] | Oh. And I’m starting | 对了 我还开创了 |
[08:49] | a new family tradition. | 一个新的家庭传统 |
[08:50] | It involves me never coming | 那就是我再也不参加 |
[08:52] | to any family occasions ever again. | 任何家庭集会了 |
[08:55] | Honey, where are you going? | 亲爱的 你去哪儿 |
[08:59] | Home. | 回家 |
[09:40] | oh, my god. | 天呐 |
[09:42] | Would you stop with the screaming? | 你能别再叫了吗 |
[09:47] | What are you doing here? | 你在这儿干吗 |
[09:48] | I came to slaughter old Tiburon. | 我来宰老蒂布龙的 |
[09:50] | Wait, isn’t that the turkey | 等等 这不是 |
[09:51] | you pardoned on the quad yesterday? | 你昨天在广场上放走的那只火鸡吗 |
[09:52] | Yes. Good old tiburon. | 是啊 多好的老蒂布龙啊 |
[09:54] | You don’t think we would actually | 你不会真的以为我们 |
[09:55] | pardon a turkey, do you? | 会放过一只火鸡吧 会吗 |
[09:57] | It’s more like a stay of execution | 这更像是一直等到没人注意时 |
[09:59] | until no one is looking. | 再进行处决 |
[10:01] | But why here? | 可干嘛来这里宰 |
[10:03] | Ah. Well, I was disinvited | 我又没收到 |
[10:05] | to Thanksgiving at my in-laws’ | 婆家人的感恩节邀请 |
[10:07] | because they still think that I killed their son, | 因为他们仍然认为是我杀了他们的儿子 |
[10:10] | my jerk-off ex-husband, | 就是我那混蛋前夫 |
[10:12] | so I’m kind of on my own. | 所以我只能独身一人过节了 |
[10:13] | Plus, you girls have the best cooking facilities on campus, | 而且你们有校园里最好的烹调设施 |
[10:16] | although it doesn’t look like you ever use them. | 尽管你们好像从来不用 |
[10:18] | Why are you here? | 你为什么会在这里 |
[10:19] | My family Thanksgiving sucked, so I came here. | 我家里的感恩节糟糕透了 所以我回来了 |
[10:23] | Since you already have a turkey, | 既然你已经有了一只火鸡 |
[10:24] | why don’t we just cook here? | 我们何不就在这做饭呢 |
[10:25] | I’ve never cooked before, but that should be fine, | 我之前从没做过饭 但也没关系 |
[10:27] | since I usually just pretend to eat. | 因为平时吃东西我也是假装的 |
[10:29] | Well, I can cook and eat for the both of us. | 我们俩的份都可以交给我 |
[10:33] | But I demand that after we eat, we play charades. | 但是我要求饭后玩字谜游戏 |
[10:37] | Deal. | 成交 |
[10:58] | Hi, dad. | 你好 老爸 |
[10:59] | Hey, where are you? | 你在哪里 |
[11:01] | You promised me you’d at least come by here | 你答应过我和扎丹飞去奥克兰前 |
[11:02] | before you flew to Oakland with Zayday. | 至少会过来一次 |
[11:04] | Yeah, we decided not to go. | 我们决定不去了 |
[11:05] | You’re in town? Where are you? | 你在镇里吗 你在哪 |
[11:07] | We’re at Kappa. | 我们在卡帕 |
[11:08] | We felt weird leaving the house all alone. | 我们感觉这屋子空无一人的话会很奇怪 |
[11:10] | Besides, Dean Munsch and Chanel #3 are here. | 而且 蒙什教务长和香奈儿三号也在呢 |
[11:13] | So we’ve decided to have an orphans Thanksgiving all together. | 所以我们决定一起过”孤儿”感恩节 |
[11:16] | But you’re not an orphan. | 但你不是孤儿 |
[11:17] | Your dad is ten minutes away. | 你爸离你只有十分钟的路程 |
[11:19] | Thanksgiving? | 感恩节吗 |
[11:20] | Honey, it’s kind of like our cranberry jam. | 亲爱的 这有点像我们的蔓越莓果酱 |
[11:23] | Where’s Gigi? | 琪琪在哪里 |
[11:24] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
[11:27] | She just didn’t show up. | 她没来 |
[11:28] | Oh, no, no, number three. | 不不 香奈儿三号 |
[11:30] | You pull the feathers the way they lay on the bird. | 拔毛要顺着拔 |
[11:33] | And don’t pull too many or you’ll tear the skin. | 不要一次拔太多 否则你会撕破皮的 |
[11:35] | I mean, I guess you could come over here If you wanted. | 你想的话 你可以过来 |
[11:40] | Okay, um, only if it’s okay with you. | 好吧 只要你没意见 |
[11:43] | Yeah, I mean, it’s fine. | 我没意见 |
[11:44] | I’ll see you soon. | 待会见 |
[11:45] | Yes, I’ll see you. | 嗯 待会见 |
[11:52] | Welcome, everyone. | 欢迎 各位 |
[11:54] | It is so nice you could all make it home | 你们都能回家 |
[11:56] | for another Radwell family Thanksgiving. | 共度雷德威尔家族的感恩节真是太好了 |
[11:59] | We have a newcomer this year. | 今年我们有一位新客人 |
[12:01] | So, let’s all give a round | 所以 让我们一起向我们的 |
[12:04] | of tolerant Radwell applause to our newcomer | 新客人致以雷德威尔家热烈的欢迎 |
[12:08] | Chanel… Oberlin. | 香奈儿…奥伯林 |
[12:14] | Yes, welcome, Chanel. | 欢迎 香奈儿 |
[12:17] | Chad hasn’t mentioned you… ever. | 查德没有提起过你…从来没有 |
[12:20] | Before we, uh, dig into this | 在我们享用雷德威尔太太 |
[12:21] | delicious feast that Mrs. Radwell has spent all day overseeing, | 花了一整天时间监督的美餐前 |
[12:25] | let us honor the timeworn, age-old Radwell tradition | 让我们先向雷德威尔家族历史悠久的传统致敬 |
[12:30] | of standing up, stating our names | 站起来 说出我们的名字 |
[12:33] | and saying what we’re thankful for this year. | 并说说今年感激什么 |
[12:35] | I’m Tad Radwell and I am thankful | 我是泰德·雷德威尔 我感激 |
[12:38] | that the turmoil in the Fertile Crescent | 新月沃土[指中东一带]的骚动 |
[12:40] | has not impacted this family’s wealth. | 没有影响到这个家族的财富 |
[12:46] | I am Bunny Radwell | 我是本尼·雷德威尔 |
[12:48] | and I’m thankful that the Radwell family name | 我感恩的是雷德威尔家族的姓氏 |
[12:51] | continues to be one of the oldest bloodlines in America. | 依旧是美国最古老的血统之一 |
[12:56] | Who exactly are the Oberlins, Chanel? | 奥伯林家族到底是何方圣神啊 香奈儿 |
[13:00] | Mrs. Radwell, I am happy to report that the Oberlin family is | 雷德威尔太太 很高兴向您汇报奥伯林家族 |
[13:03] | a well-established American dynasty. | 是一个源远流长的美国王朝 |
[13:06] | A little known fact is that my great-great- | 鲜为人知的是 |
[13:09] | great-great grandfather Ichabod Oberlin actually | 我的曾曾曾曾祖父伊卡博德·奥伯林 |
[13:12] | signed the Declaration of Independence. | 签订了独立宣言 |
[13:14] | It’s only “little known” because he was | 这件事鲜为人知的原因是 |
[13:16] | the last one to sign it, so there was no more room | 他是最后一个签字的人 没有空间 |
[13:18] | for him to put his name on the front, | 让他把名字签在前面 |
[13:19] | so he had to flip it over and put his name on the back. | 所以他只能翻过来 把名字签在背面 |
[13:21] | Oh, also the Oberlins came over on the Mayflower. | 奥伯林家族还是乘着五月花号船到这里的 |
[13:25] | Oh, well, the Radwells came over on a ship | 雷德威尔家族是乘着 |
[13:28] | that arrived 30 years before the Mayflower. | 比五月花号船还早三十年的船抵达这里的 |
[13:33] | So… | 所以… |
[13:35] | I’m Thad Radwell. | 我是赛德·雷德威尔 |
[13:37] | and this year I’m so thankful for the | 今年我尤其感激 |
[13:39] | lax indecency laws in eastern Europe | 东欧松懈的猥亵罪法律 |
[13:42] | that inundate our internet | 网络上泛滥着的黄片 |
[13:44] | with millions of hours of hard-core porn. | 有数百万小时之久 |
[13:48] | which helps to just generally raise the bar | 完全提高了小妞们 |
[13:50] | on the stuff that chicks feel like they have to do now. | 觉得该怎么去做的门槛 |
[13:53] | I mean, am I right? | 我说的没错吧 |
[13:56] | Come on, let’s go, blue! | 来吧 加油蓝队啊 |
[14:00] | Hello. | 大家好 |
[14:01] | I’m Muffy St. Pierre-Radwell. | 我是马菲·圣皮埃尔·雷德威尔 |
[14:04] | And I am so, so thankful | 我很感激 |
[14:06] | for my husband Brad. | 我的丈夫布莱德 |
[14:09] | And also that I’m starting my very own new clothing line, | 还有我要开始自己新的服装品牌了 |
[14:11] | – and it’s gonna be so… – Hey, everyone. | -而那会很… -大家好 |
[14:13] | I’m Brad Radwell. | 我是布莱德·雷德威尔 |
[14:15] | And for the third year in a row, | 这是连续第三年 |
[14:16] | I am thankful that I work at L.A.’s hottest talent agency, | 我很庆幸能在洛杉矶最热门的人才机构 |
[14:20] | Accentuated Artists, huh? | 《艺术之家》工作 不错吧 |
[14:22] | Up high– boom! Boom! | 击个掌 |
[14:23] | You know, ever since I was a little boy, | 我还是个小男孩时 |
[14:26] | I knew what god wanted me to do and that was make money | 就知道上帝希望我做什么 那就是 |
[14:28] | off the backs of creative people. | 利用富有创造力的人们赚钱 |
[14:34] | Hello, I’m Chad Radwell. | 大家好 我是查德·雷德威尔 |
[14:37] | This year I’m thankful for someone who’s very special to me. | 今年我很感激某个对我有特殊意义的人 |
[14:41] | Without this person, I wouldn’t be the man I am right now. | 没有这个人 我也成为不了现在的自己 |
[14:45] | In fact, I wouldn’t be here at all. | 事实上 我压根就不会在这里 |
[14:48] | I am, of course, referring to the serial killer | 当然 我说的就是潜伏在 |
[14:50] | who’s stalking the campus of Wallace University. | 华莱士大学的连环杀手 |
[14:53] | I am so thankful that he, for whatever reason, | 我非常感谢他 至今还没有杀我 |
[14:55] | has not murdered me yet. | 不论出于什么原因 |
[14:57] | I am so, so grateful. | 我非常 非常感激 |
[15:00] | I’m also thankful to that serial killer | 我也很感谢那个连环杀手 |
[15:03] | for not killing you, Chad. | 没有杀你 查德 |
[15:05] | And that you will have a long, long, long life. | 这样你将拥有很长的人生 |
[15:09] | You have such a vast future ahead of you. | 拥有广阔的未来在等你 |
[15:12] | You’ll meet so many new and different women. | 你会遇到许多新异的女人 |
[15:15] | So many wonderful women to go out with | 有很多优秀的女人去约会 |
[15:18] | and break up with | 去分手 |
[15:19] | and move on from. | 去继续约会 |
[15:21] | You should be thankful that this table is | 你应该感谢这张桌子 |
[15:23] | too long for me to reach across and strangle you, bitch! | 太长让我没法过去勒死你 臭女人 |
[15:27] | Excuse me, | 抱歉打扰 |
[15:27] | but another guest has arrived. | 另一位客人到了 |
[15:29] | A lady by the name of… Hester. | 一位女士 名叫海斯特 |
[15:32] | Oh, god, no, no, no, no! | 天啊 不不不不 |
[15:35] | Happy Thanksgiving, Radwells. | 感恩节快乐 雷德威尔家族 |
[15:37] | I’m sorry I’m late. | 对不起我迟到了 |
[15:39] | Oh, god. | 天啊 |
[15:40] | What did I miss? | 我错过了什么 |
[15:47] | I hope I haven’t kept you waiting. | 希望我没让你们等太久 |
[15:49] | – I’m famished. – I beg your pardon. | -我好饿 -不好意思 |
[15:52] | But who are you? | 请问你是谁 |
[15:54] | Uh, she is | 她是 |
[15:55] | my-my sober coach. | 我的醒酒教练 |
[15:57] | What? | 什么 |
[15:58] | Chad, I didn’t know you had a drinking problem. | 查德 我没听说过你酗酒啊 |
[16:00] | Neither did I. | 我之前都不知道 |
[16:02] | That is how insidious alcoholism is, dad. | 酒精的魅力就在于此 爸 |
[16:05] | That’s true. | 确实 |
[16:06] | Let me help you put this on your lap. | 我帮你把这个铺腿上 |
[16:08] | What are you doing here? How are you alive? | 你来这儿干什么 你怎么还活着 |
[16:10] | Good thing I was wearing this neck brace | 你把我推下楼梯时 |
[16:11] | when you pushed me down the stairs, | 我带着颈托真是明智之举 |
[16:12] | because it saved my life. | 因为它救了我一命 |
[16:14] | And laying me on the ground in the meat locker | 你把我放在冷藏室的地上 |
[16:15] | was the perfect thing to do. | 更是帮了大忙 |
[16:17] | The hard slab of the cold steel | 硬地板和冷钢墙 |
[16:18] | curbed the swelling in my spinal column. | 抑制了我脊椎的肿胀 |
[16:20] | When I woke up and regained consciousness, | 当我醒来恢复知觉时 |
[16:21] | I felt better than ever. | 我感觉比以前更舒服了 |
[16:23] | Really, I should be thanking you right now. | 真的 我现在应该感谢你 |
[16:25] | That fall? | 那一摔 |
[16:26] | It might have cured me of my severe scoliosis. | 估计是治好了我严重的脊椎侧弯 |
[16:28] | Dinner is served. | 晚餐上齐了 |
[16:31] | Radwells? | 雷德威尔家族 |
[16:32] | I have an announcement to make. | 我有重要的事情宣布 |
[16:35] | This is a blessed occasion. | 这是一个幸福的时刻 |
[16:38] | Because I am carrying | 因为我带来了 |
[16:41] | a little bit of each one of you | 在座各位的血脉 |
[16:44] | inside of me. | 在我体内 |
[16:45] | I have a little Radwell inside of me. | 我怀了雷德威尔家的孩子 |
[16:51] | I’m having Chad’s baby! | 我怀了查德的孩子 |
[16:53] | – We’re so happy. – That’s a lie! | -我们很开心 -她骗人 |
[16:55] | I saw her eat sushi, soft cheese and booze! | 我看见她吃寿司 软奶酪 还喝酒 |
[16:58] | Enough! | 够了 |
[17:00] | Chad, I have never been so ashamed! | 查德 我从没这么丢脸过 |
[17:04] | You have besmirched the Radwell family Thanksgiving | 你玷污了雷德威尔家族的感恩节 |
[17:07] | by bringing home not one | 你带回家不止一个 |
[17:09] | but two gold-digging hoochies! | 而是两个淘金荡妇 |
[17:13] | I’m sorry, but maybe you didn’t hear me. | 对不起 你没听见吗 |
[17:14] | I’m carrying your future grandchild! | 我怀了你未来的孙子 |
[17:17] | You listen to me, you swarthy little runt. | 你给我听好了 你个小黑牛 |
[17:19] | We have an entire legal team | 我们家拥有一整支私家律师团 |
[17:20] | at Bender, Bender & Stanwyk on retainer | 在本德 本德和斯坦维克律所 |
[17:23] | just to make spurious paternity claims | 就是为了让你这种假怀孕的声明 |
[17:25] | like yours simply go away. | 分分钟消失 |
[17:28] | But I’m carrying your son’s seed. | 但是我怀了你儿子的种 |
[17:31] | The only thing you’re carrying is water weight, | 你怀的就是一肚子水 |
[17:33] | you bloated little tramp. | 你个胖胖的小瘪三 |
[17:35] | That’s not a baby bump. | 那根本不是怀孕的大肚子 |
[17:37] | That’s a poo belly. | 而是一肚子屎 |
[17:39] | Poo belly, poo belly, | 一肚子屎 一肚子屎 |
[17:41] | poo belly, poo belly… | 一肚子屎 一肚子屎 |
[17:44] | Now, | 现在 |
[17:45] | would someone please | 麻烦谁帮我 |
[17:46] | pass me the stuffing? | 递一下填料 |
[17:50] | Wow, who knew it took so long to cook a turkey? | 原来做个火鸡要这么久 |
[17:53] | All right, ladies, Weston, let’s head into the dining room, | 好了 姑娘们 韦斯顿 我们去 |
[17:56] | where we fill up on peking ravioli and charcuterie. | 摆满饺子和熟肉的餐厅吧 |
[17:59] | I have a little game to play | 我有个小游戏 |
[18:01] | that’s gonna make the time fly right by. | 会让时间过得飞快 |
[18:06] | Yes, it’s simple. | 是的 很简单 |
[18:07] | We’re gonna go around, and each of us is gonna | 我们轮流发言 每一个人都要 |
[18:09] | make our case as to who we think the red devil killer is. | 指出你认为的红衣恶魔杀手 |
[18:13] | I’ll go first. | 我先来 |
[18:14] | I think we can all agree that | 我认为大家都认同 |
[18:16] | one of the red devil killers is Boone. | 其中一个红衣恶魔杀手是布恩 |
[18:18] | I propose that the other red devil killer is… | 我认为另一个红衣恶魔杀手是 |
[18:23] | Chanel #3. | 香奈儿三号 |
[18:26] | What? | 什么 |
[18:27] | No, I’ve never killed anyone | 不 我没杀过人 |
[18:28] | as far as I know. | 据我所知 |
[18:29] | But your real daddy has, baby Manson. | 但是你的亲爹杀过 小曼森 |
[18:33] | Okay, there is no evidence at all | 好了 完全并没有证据表明 |
[18:35] | that mass murder is genetic. | 杀人的嗜好会遗传 |
[18:36] | Wait, her dad is Charles Manson– | 等等 她爸是查尔斯·曼森 |
[18:38] | how do I not know this? | 我怎么不知道 |
[18:39] | I’m not saying it’s anything more | 我要说的证据 |
[18:41] | than pepper in the soup, | 比一大锅油汤里的 |
[18:43] | seasoning for a big fat dish | 调味辣椒 |
[18:46] | – of well-cooked evidence. – Such as? | -还要劲爆 -比如说呢 |
[18:48] | Item one– the chain saw attack at Kappa. | 第一项 卡帕的那次电锯袭击 |
[18:56] | I was probably the last one to wake up | 我当晚可能是最后一个醒来 |
[18:58] | and come downstairs that night. | 并来到楼下的 |
[19:02] | I saw Chanel #3 | 我看见香奈儿三号 |
[19:04] | running up the back stairway, | 跑上后面的楼梯 |
[19:06] | face glowing with perspiration, | 脸上因出汗而油光锃亮 |
[19:08] | trying to sneak into her room undetected. | 想趁人不注意 偷偷溜回她的卧室 |
[19:11] | I would say that is more than a little suspicious. | 要我说 那可是相当可疑啊 |
[19:14] | I have bathroom shame issues. | 我有厕所尴尬综合症 |
[19:16] | I always wait until everyone is asleep and then I sneak | 我总是等到大家都睡着以后 |
[19:18] | down to poop in the little powder room downstairs. | 再悄悄溜到楼下的卫生间上大号 |
[19:20] | That way, no one will disturb me. | 这样没人打扰我 |
[19:22] | I usually wait a week or so between movements, | 我通常会隔一周左右再去上第二次大号 |
[19:24] | so it can be kind of an intense workout– I sweat a lot. | 好让自己做下剧烈运动 我可没少出汗 |
[19:27] | Yeah, right. | 对 没错 |
[19:28] | Um, okay, even still, | 等一下 就算是这样 |
[19:29] | how could she possibly be | 但她怎么可能 |
[19:30] | Charles Manson’s daughter | 既是查尔斯·曼森的女儿 |
[19:32] | and one of the babies in the bathtub? | 又是浴缸里出生的其中一个婴儿呢 |
[19:33] | I mean, don’t we all agree that those babies are the killers? | 我们不是都认为那些婴儿就是杀手吗 |
[19:36] | Do we even have any evidence | 可有什么证据能证明 |
[19:37] | that this Manson story is true? | 她真的是曼森的女儿呢 |
[19:41] | How do we know she didn’t just invent it | 你怎么知道她不是为了洗脱嫌疑 |
[19:44] | just so we wouldn’t think she was the killer? | 而故意编了这么个故事呢 |
[19:49] | Goose. | 对吧 |
[19:50] | That seems like an unnecessarily complicated cover story. | 如果那真是个幌子 未免也太复杂了吧 |
[19:53] | Yes, but aren’t those the best kind? | 我知道 但这幌子不也正效果奇佳吗 |
[19:57] | I think we have plenty here | 看来还有很多问题 |
[19:59] | to go to the police. | 需要警察帮忙 |
[20:00] | Let’s see how innocent Chanel #3 looks | 等他们开始深入调查 再看看咱们三号 |
[20:03] | when they start to dig a little. | 是否像她所说的那般无辜 |
[20:04] | Hold the phone, Dean Munsch. | 先别打电话 蒙什教务长 |
[20:05] | I’d like to play, too. | 我也想猜一下 |
[20:07] | And the person I think it is… | 我猜这个杀人凶手… |
[20:09] | is you. | 是你 |
[20:12] | Hello, mother, it’s me. | 你好 妈妈 是我 |
[20:14] | Chanel Oberlin! | 香奈儿·奥伯林啊 |
[20:16] | Your daughter? | 你的女儿呀 |
[20:17] | What, are you drunk? | 什么 你喝醉了吗 |
[20:19] | Okay, drunk on wine is still drunk, mother. | 喝红酒喝醉了也算醉了 妈妈 |
[20:23] | You know what, never mind. | 我告诉你 算了 |
[20:25] | You know, the one time I call you for a little advice, | 我唯一一次打电话来寻求你的意见 |
[20:28] | you’re hammered. | 你却醉得不省人事 |
[20:31] | Happy Thanksgiving, mom. | 感恩节快乐 妈妈 |
[20:38] | I suppose we should discuss the matter of payment. | 我想我们该讨论一下报酬的事情了 |
[20:42] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么呢 |
[20:44] | I’m asking you to name your price. | 我想让你开个价 |
[20:46] | My price? | 开个价 |
[20:48] | Are you propositioning me? | 你这是在向我提议吗 |
[20:50] | No, I’m asking how much money it’ll take | 不 我只是想问我要出多少钱 |
[20:53] | to make you go away. | 才能让你离开 |
[20:54] | You seem to be unaware, Sir, | 您似乎有所不知 先生 |
[20:56] | that an Oberlin cannot be bought. | 奥伯林家的人是不会被钱收买的 |
[20:58] | My family is super-gross rich. | 因为我家可富得流油啊 |
[21:01] | Look at how you’ve chosen to dress. | 你瞧瞧你这身打扮 |
[21:02] | That outfit screams desperation. | 这套服装真是不堪入目呢 |
[21:07] | You’re trash, Chanel. | 你什么也不是 香奈儿 |
[21:09] | Which means your family’s trash, too. | 而你的家族也一文不值 |
[21:11] | And I’ll tell you one thing right now, | 我现在就可以告诉你一件事 |
[21:12] | you will never get your hands on the Radwell fortune. | 你永远也别想分到雷德威尔家的财产 |
[21:16] | I am, however, | 而我呢 |
[21:17] | willing to write you a check for $50,000 | 倒是很乐意给你开张五万美元的支票 |
[21:21] | if you will leave now and never come back. | 如果你立马走人并保证永远不回来 |
[21:25] | It’s a lot of money for a family like yours. | 对你这种家庭来说可不是一笔小数目 |
[21:27] | They could use it to buy another olive garden | 他们可以用这笔钱卖一座新橄榄园 |
[21:29] | or whatever it is they do. | 或者干些别的 |
[21:39] | Let me ask you a question. | 我问你一个问题 |
[21:40] | What is the best part about Thanksgiving? | 你知道感恩节最棒的地方在哪吗 |
[21:42] | The leftovers. | 是这些剩饭剩菜 |
[21:44] | What do you do if you can’t wait till the next morning | 要是你不想等到第二天早上再吃它们 |
[21:46] | to eat those leftovers? | 你会怎么做 |
[21:47] | You turn those leftovers into dessert. | 你可以把它们做成饭后甜点 |
[21:50] | What about the pumpkin pie? | 那南瓜派呢 |
[21:53] | Okay, once you’ve had savory leftover Aspica La Radwell, | 一旦你品尝了美味的雷德威尔特制肉冻 |
[21:57] | you’ll never want pumpkin pie ever again. | 你就再也不想吃南瓜派了 |
[22:00] | Tastes like Henry VIII just barfed in my mouth. | 那口感就像亨利八世吐在我嘴里一样 |
[22:02] | Chad! | 查德 |
[22:03] | Your father just offered me $50,000 | 你父亲刚才说给我五万美元 |
[22:06] | to leave the house and never come back. | 让我立马走人并保证永远不回来 |
[22:08] | Well, I don’t want to sound like a dick here, | 虽然我不想说这么难听的话 |
[22:10] | but have you ever considered maybe you should leave? | 但也许你现在真的应该走了 |
[22:12] | I mean, with you and Hester here, this Thanksgiving, | 如果你和海丝特都呆在这 这个感恩节 |
[22:14] | it’s spiraling out of control. | 咱就别想过了 |
[22:16] | And later tonight, we’re about to | 况且 我们今晚还打算 |
[22:17] | get together and play Pictionary, and as it stands now, | 玩画图猜字呢 但照现在这状况 |
[22:19] | that game of Pictionary is gonna be super awkward. | 我想玩画图猜字的时候一定超级尴尬 |
[22:21] | You can’t be serious. | 你开玩笑呢吧 |
[22:22] | I am serious, Chanel, and uberconfused. | 我认真的 香奈儿 而且我还超困惑 |
[22:25] | Hester here, who is super weird | 这位海丝特小姐 人超诡异 |
[22:26] | and an obvious psychopath, | 而且明摆着是个神经病 |
[22:28] | she says she’s pregnant. | 她说她怀孕了 |
[22:29] | You said she’s not pregnant. | 而你说她没有 |
[22:30] | You said she was dead, | 你说她摔死了 |
[22:31] | she says she’s not dead. | 然而她说她没死 |
[22:33] | I’m kind of inclined to believe her. | 我渐渐开始相信她了 |
[22:34] | Plus, are you gonna make, like, a habit | 再说 难道你真的要养成 |
[22:35] | of just, like, pushing people down the stairs? | 这种推人下楼的习惯吗 |
[22:37] | ‘Cause I think we can agree, | 我想我们都不认为 |
[22:38] | not the most adult form of conflict resolution, Chanel. | 这是个成熟解决矛盾的做法 香奈儿 |
[22:42] | Ladies and gentlemen, | 女士们先生们 |
[22:43] | dessert is served. | 甜点已经上桌了 |
[22:47] | Mom, dad! | 妈 爸 |
[22:48] | Thad, Brad! | 赛德 布莱德 |
[22:50] | I’m trying to get my aspic on! | 我已经等不及要吃肉冻了 |
[22:54] | Now that I have my snacks, | 我的开胃菜好了 |
[22:56] | you may begin with your clearly desperate attempt | 你可以开始绞尽脑汁列出证据 |
[22:59] | to prove I’m a killer. | 来证明我是凶手了 |
[23:01] | Wait. | 再等一下 |
[23:02] | Weston, would you mind opening a bottle of red for mama? | 韦斯顿 你能给蒙妈妈开一瓶红酒吗 |
[23:07] | Hey, all! | 大家好呀 |
[23:09] | I brought some of my famous eight-meat stuffing. | 我带来了一些我家著名的”八肉混合馅” |
[23:12] | It’s beef, venison, alligator, buffalo, rabbit, | 里面有牛肉鹿肉鳄鱼肉水牛肉兔肉 |
[23:15] | goat, rattlesnake and spam. | 还有山羊肉响尾蛇肉午餐肉 |
[23:16] | I cut all of the meats super thin, | 我把它们切得超级薄 |
[23:19] | So that you’re guaranteed | 这样保证了每一口里面 |
[23:20] | every meat in every bite. | 都能吃到每种肉 |
[23:22] | When’d you get here, Chanel #5? | 你是什么时候来的 香奈儿五号 |
[23:24] | I thought you said | 我还以为你说 |
[23:25] | you were leaving forever or something like that? | 永远都不会回来了什么的 |
[23:26] | She says stuff like that but never really follows through. | 她经常说那样的话 但向来都是说了不算 |
[23:29] | Well, I, um, I actually did go home, | 我确实是回家了 |
[23:32] | but apparently my family forgot to tell me | 但是很显然我家人忘记告诉我 |
[23:34] | that they were going to the Maldives this year | 他们今年会去马尔代夫 |
[23:36] | for Thanksgiving, so… | 过感恩节 所以 |
[23:39] | I’m fine. | 我没事 |
[23:41] | Sure, whatever. | 当然 随便你 |
[23:42] | You came just in time for me to tell everyone | 你来的正是时候 我正准备告诉大家 |
[23:44] | why I know that Dean Munsch is the killer. | 为什么我知道蒙什教务长是凶手 |
[23:47] | Who is the only person we know | 在我们认识的人之中 |
[23:48] | who has a more clear and obvious motive for killing Kappas | 还有谁会”逼”蒙什教务长更有动机 |
[23:51] | “Then” Dean Munsch? | 杀卡帕成员呢 |
[23:53] | Than Dean Munsch. | “比”蒙什教务长 |
[23:55] | Than. | 比 |
[23:56] | Not then– than. | 不是”逼” 是”比” |
[23:58] | Have you ever even cracked open a book? | 你是一本书都没看过吗 |
[24:00] | Or attended a class? | 也一节课都没上过吗 |
[24:03] | God. I hate you people. | 天啊 我讨厌你们这帮人 |
[24:05] | Exactly. You hate sororities and you hate Kappa Kappa Tau, | 没错 你讨厌姐妹会 讨厌KKT姐妹会 |
[24:08] | and when you couldn’t just kick us off campus, | 当你不能把我们赶出校园时 |
[24:10] | you made sure no one pledged but losers, | 你确保除了废柴之外没人申请加入 |
[24:12] | and then started removing us from school | 然后就开始把我们清出校园 |
[24:14] | the only way you could, murder. | 你唯一的方式就是 谋杀 |
[24:17] | She has a point, Dean Munsch. | 她说的确实有理 蒙什教务长 |
[24:20] | You were there that night in Kappa 20 years ago, | 二十年前的那晚 你也在卡帕公馆 |
[24:22] | and no one knows what happened to the babies. | 而且没有人知道那些婴儿的下落 |
[24:25] | It makes sense that you could have taken them | 有可能是你把他们带走了 |
[24:27] | and raised them as your killer pawns | 并把他们养成杀人工具 |
[24:29] | in service of getting revenge on a place | 然后让他们替你来报复这里 |
[24:31] | that you consider to be evil. | 这个被你视为邪恶的地方 |
[24:33] | Really, that’s quite a reach. | 是吗 这也太迂回曲折了 |
[24:34] | Not really. | 不见得 |
[24:36] | You did say just the other day | 就在几天前 你确实说过 |
[24:37] | that the only way to live is to play the long game. | 放长线钓大鱼是唯一的生存方式 |
[24:40] | Spending 20 years plotting for payback | 花二十年时间去计划 |
[24:42] | on a crime you consider to be horrible | 一场非常恐怖的复仇 |
[24:44] | is exactly the kind of thing that you would do. | 正是你会做的事情 |
[24:48] | And of course you would wait | 当然你会等着 |
[24:49] | until the daughter of the ringleader of that crime | 直到罪魁祸首的女儿 |
[24:51] | arrived on campus. | 回到校园的时候 |
[24:53] | I really hope | 我真希望 |
[24:55] | you can come up with something better than that. | 你们能说出个比这更靠谱的推理 |
[24:57] | I can. | 我能 |
[24:59] | I can prove that you’re the only person in this room | 我能证明在座之中 你就是凶手 |
[25:01] | we know for a fact is a murderer. | 我们认为事实就是如此 |
[25:02] | I saw you in the coffee shop the other day, | 那天我在咖啡店看见你 |
[25:04] | reading one of your old Playgirl magazines. | 你在看一本过期的《花花女郎》 |
[25:07] | I didn’t look that closely, | 我看得不是很仔细 |
[25:08] | but what I did see was your meal. | 但是我看见了你吃的东西 |
[25:11] | Baked Lays, a pickle wedge, a blondie, | 乐事薯片 酸黄瓜 布朗尼蛋糕 |
[25:14] | and a half-eaten bologna sandwich. | 还有一个吃了一半的腊肠三明治 |
[25:16] | Wait. | 等等 |
[25:17] | You are allergic to bologna. | 你对腊肠过敏 |
[25:19] | That’s the whole reason they knew | 正因为这个理由 |
[25:20] | you didn’t kill your ex-husband. | 他们才认为你前夫不是你杀的 |
[25:22] | No, you can’t be allergic to bologna or any other lunch meat. | 不对 你不可能对腊肠或者其他午餐肉过敏 |
[25:25] | People who are allergic to those things | 那些对午餐肉类过敏的人 |
[25:27] | are affected by the sulfites in them, | 是因为其中所含的亚硝酸盐 |
[25:28] | which are plentiful | 但我肉馅里掺的 |
[25:29] | in the spam that’s in my stuffing | 午餐肉就有亚硝酸盐 |
[25:32] | that you’re eating right now. | 你现在正吃着 |
[25:34] | And in the red wine you’re washing it down with. | 你搭配红酒吃的正欢呢 |
[25:36] | Feel free to call the police now, Dean Munsch, | 现在你可以报警了 蒙什教务长 |
[25:38] | or I’d be perfectly happy to do it for you. | 或者我也很乐意替你报警 |
[25:41] | Wait. | 等等 |
[25:47] | There’s something I need to say first. | 我还有件事要说 |
[25:51] | Something that’s been eating at me for the longest time. | 这件事已经困扰我很久了 |
[25:54] | Now, I’m not saying I know who the killer is, | 我不是说我知道凶手是谁 |
[25:57] | but I just-just want to talk it through. | 但是我只是想说说我的想法 |
[25:59] | What? Dad, who do you think the killer is? | 什么 爸爸 你以为凶手还能是谁 |
[26:04] | I’m sorry, Gracie, | 我很抱歉 格蕾西 |
[26:07] | but I think the killer might be… | 但是我认为凶手有可能是 |
[26:11] | you. | 你 |
[26:26] | Dad, how could you honestly think that I’m the killer? | 爸爸 你怎么能认为我是凶手呢 |
[26:29] | Look, I don’t want you to be, honey. | 我也不想你是凶手 宝贝 |
[26:31] | Okay, look, there’s just some stuff | 但是有些事情 |
[26:33] | that doesn’t add up. | 就是说不通 |
[26:34] | Look, I’ve gone through all the suspects in my mind, | 我已经在脑海里想过了所有的嫌疑人 |
[26:36] | and I can explain away all my suspicions | 对其他人的怀疑 我都能解释得通 |
[26:38] | for everyone except you. | 除了对你的怀疑 |
[26:40] | Can we just talk this out, | 我们能不能好好聊聊 |
[26:41] | so you can help me see that I’m wrong? | 让我证明自己的怀疑是错的 |
[26:44] | Turkey isn’t ready yet. | 火鸡还没准备好 |
[26:46] | Actually, I kind of think that she’s the killer, too. | 实际上 我也有点儿怀疑她是凶手 |
[26:49] | I mean, it would fit in with your whole | 这符合你的性格 |
[26:51] | hard worker, let’s find out the truth, | 什么努力工作 彻查真相 |
[26:53] | never take no for an answer, awful personality. | 不许别人答一个不字 这种性格好讨厌 |
[26:57] | Do you expect us to believe that when your dad told you | 你真的认为我们会相信 你爸爸告诉你 |
[26:59] | that your mom died in a fire, | 你妈妈是死于火灾 |
[27:00] | you would just accept it and move on with your life? | 你就安然接受 从此继续向前看了吗 |
[27:03] | This does raise some questions. | 这确实有些疑点 |
[27:04] | You are kind of obsessed with your mom. | 你确实对你妈妈的事情着魔了 |
[27:06] | You drone on about it endlessly. | 你没完没了地说这件事 |
[27:08] | You know what I think? | 你知道我是怎么想的吗 |
[27:09] | I think you did find out who your mom was | 我觉得你确实查出你妈妈是谁了 |
[27:12] | and that she was awful and responsible | 结果是她很差劲 |
[27:13] | for Kappa’s greatest shame, | 而且为卡帕最大的耻辱 |
[27:15] | the death of the girl in the bathtub. | 死在浴缸里面的女孩负责 |
[27:17] | And that you hated the fact | 并且你憎恨这一事实 |
[27:18] | that the face of Kappa’s evil | 卡帕的恶魔竟然是 |
[27:19] | was this woman who you idolized. | 你一直崇拜的这个女人 |
[27:21] | so you swore to come to Wallace | 所以你发誓要来华莱士大学 |
[27:23] | and create an even bigger, even worse bogeyman | 然后制造一个更强大更可怕的怪物 |
[27:26] | to represent Kappa, the red devil. | 来象征卡帕 这就是红衣恶魔 |
[27:29] | Anything to redeem your beloved dead mother. | 一切都是为了给你挚爱的已经去世的妈妈挽尊 |
[27:32] | Makes a lot of sense that that is your theory, | 五号 你这种疯婆子做出这种 |
[27:34] | number five, because it’s insane. | 疯狂的推论倒也可以理解 |
[27:36] | That makes no sense. | 这根本说不通 |
[27:38] | Pete? | 皮特 |
[27:39] | I thought you were with your family. | 我还以为你和你的家人在一起 |
[27:41] | I can’t rest when the killer’s still out there, | 我可不能在凶手还在逍遥法外的时候休息 |
[27:42] | so I stayed behind to do some more research. | 所以我留下来做了更多的调查 |
[27:44] | But how did you know we were here? | 但你是怎么知道我们在这儿的 |
[27:45] | Zayday has been live-tweeting the whole night, | 扎丹整晚都在更新她的推特 |
[27:47] | and I know everything you guys have been talking about, | 所以我对你们讨论的内容了若指掌 |
[27:49] | and you’re all wrong. | 但是你们的推理都不对 |
[27:50] | I know who the killer is, | 我知道真凶是谁 |
[27:51] | and it’s not Grace. | 凶手并非格蕾丝 |
[27:52] | Hey, get in line, okay? | 先来后到 好吗 |
[27:54] | I’m going first. | 我先说 |
[27:55] | Okay, fine, dad, you go first, then Pete can go. | 好的 爸爸 你说完皮特再说 |
[27:59] | All right, here’s what I have. | 好吧 来听听我的推理 |
[28:00] | Grace, you were the only pledge | 格蕾丝 你是唯一一个 |
[28:02] | that wasn’t buried up to her neck | 在失聪版泰勒·斯威夫特被砍掉脑袋那晚 |
[28:04] | the night the deaf Taylor Swift was decapitated. | 没被埋在土里的预备会员 |
[28:06] | And you know that girl, Mandy, who was there that night | 而且你认识曼迪 发生浴缸事件当晚她在场 |
[28:09] | in the bathtub and then ended up dead at Zayday’s haunted house? | 之后又死在了扎丹的鬼屋里 |
[28:11] | Well, no one knew anything about her | 但这二十年来 |
[28:13] | or where she was for 20 years. | 谁都不知道知道她的下落 |
[28:15] | And then when you saw her that night, | 但在你见到她的当晚 |
[28:18] | well, she ended up stabbed to death. | 她就被人捅死了 |
[28:19] | Pete was there, too, | 皮特当时也在场 |
[28:21] | and he also wasn’t buried with the pledges. | 而且他也没有被埋进土里 |
[28:23] | Yes, I know, | 是的 没错 |
[28:24] | which is why I find this stuff just interesting. | 这正是这件事的有趣之处 |
[28:27] | But what’s worrisome to me is that | 但令我不安的是另一件事 |
[28:30] | I checked the calendar to see | 我翻了翻日历 |
[28:31] | which days you did your class visit to Wallace last year. | 查到去年你们班参观华莱士大学的时间 |
[28:34] | It was March 24th to the 26th. | 那是3月24号到26号 |
[28:36] | Wait a minute, March 25th, I know that date. | 等等 是3月25号 我记得这日子 |
[28:39] | That’s the date that Melanie Dorkus, the former president of | 那正是前任KKT会长梅勒妮·多克斯 |
[28:42] | Kappa Kappa Tau, was horribly disfigured, | 因晒肤喷雾中被人掺了盐酸 |
[28:44] | when someone put acid in her spray tan. | 而惨遭毒手的日子 |
[28:48] | And right before she passed out from the pain, | 就在她疼晕之前 |
[28:51] | she said that she saw someone in a red devil costume | 她说自己看见一个打扮成红衣恶魔的人 |
[28:53] | standing over her. | 居高临下地看着她 |
[28:55] | Wait, we saw you there that day. | 等等 我们那天在这儿看见你了 |
[28:57] | Oh, I remember now. | 我记起来了 |
[28:59] | No, please don’t do this to me. | 不 求你别这样对我 |
[29:01] | Don’t you want me to spray-tan you? | 你不是想让我帮你做喷涂美黑吗 |
[29:02] | I have it all ready. | 我东西都准备好了 |
[29:04] | No, Chanel, I would honestly rather not have you around. | 不用了 香奈儿 哪儿凉快哪儿待着去吧 |
[29:18] | Who are you and what are you doing here? | 你是谁 在此有何贵干 |
[29:20] | Hi. | 你们好 |
[29:21] | Wow, are you guys sisters here? | 你们是这里的姐妹会成员吗 |
[29:23] | That is so cool. | 这太酷了 |
[29:25] | I’m an incoming freshman, | 我是刚入校的新生 |
[29:26] | and I was just checking out the campus, | 只是在校园里四处逛逛 |
[29:27] | and I was desperate to see the inside of this place. | 我真是迫不及待地想进来看看 |
[29:29] | I’m hoping to pledge when I matriculate. | 希望等我正式入学后能加入你们 |
[29:31] | You’re skinny and pretty, so that’s a plus, | 你又苗条又漂亮 这两项可以加分 |
[29:33] | but it’s highly competitive, so you’d better be rich, too. | 但这里竞争激烈 所以你最好还是富家女 |
[29:35] | Then you guys kicked me out. | 之后你们就把我赶出来了 |
[29:37] | – Yeah. – Good times. | -是啊 -干得漂亮 |
[29:39] | There is one other thing. | 而且还有一件事值得怀疑 |
[29:40] | You know how at the beginning of the year, | 在这学年开学之初 |
[29:42] | I was always secretly following you | 我经常悄悄跟着你 |
[29:44] | so I could just keep an eye on you, make sure you were safe? | 这样我就能看着你 确保你的安全 |
[29:46] | Your dad is a stalker. | 你爸是个跟踪狂 |
[29:48] | Well, one night I was hash tag being a good father, | 一天晚上 我为履行好父亲的职责 |
[29:51] | and I was looking out for you. | 而四下找你的时候 |
[29:56] | I heard you talking to someone, | 我听到你在和谁说话 |
[29:58] | but I couldn’t hear what it was about. | 但我听不清你们说了些什么 |
[30:00] | And when I peeked around that wall, | 我藏在墙角偷看时 |
[30:03] | I almost fainted from what I saw. | 眼前那一幕简直让我快晕过去了 |
[30:06] | No, dad, that was Pete. | 不 爸爸 那是皮特 |
[30:08] | Yeah, that was me. | 对 那是我 |
[30:09] | What? | 什么 |
[30:10] | Okay, we had plans to hand out flyers to see if anyone had | 我们本打算发发传单 |
[30:13] | any information about the red devil, | 看看有谁知道红衣恶魔的消息 |
[30:14] | and since Pete already had the costume, | 因为皮特正好有件一样的戏服 |
[30:16] | we thought it would be a good idea | 所以我们觉得可以借机 |
[30:17] | for people to see what he looked like. | 让大家看看红衣恶魔的模样 |
[30:18] | Yeah, but we didn’t carry through with the plan. | 是的 但我们并没有执行那个计划 |
[30:20] | Oh, thick as thieves, you two. | 我明白了 你们俩是共犯 |
[30:22] | It’s amazing how he’s Grace’s alibi | 皮特为格蕾丝所犯下的多桩可怕谋杀 |
[30:25] | for so many of the horrible murders. | 都提供不在场证明 真是令人发指 |
[30:27] | Okay, I-I am now convinced that the murderer is not nutbag #3 | 我现在相信了 凶手不是疯婆子三号 |
[30:32] | but is indeed Grace. | 而是格蕾丝 |
[30:34] | No, I am not. | 不 不是我 |
[30:36] | No, no, she’s not. | 不 不 她不是 |
[30:38] | And now I’m sure of it. | 现在我可以确定了 |
[30:40] | Thank you for letting me talk about this, | 谢谢你让我把这些说出来 |
[30:42] | talk this out, and hear your side of the story. I’m so relieved. | 听到你对这些事情的解释我如释重负 |
[30:45] | Don’t talk to me. | 别和我说话 |
[30:46] | Of course she’s not the killer, Mr. Gardner. | 她当然不是凶手了 加德纳先生 |
[30:49] | And look, I know this is kind of awkward, | 虽然我知道这非常尴尬 |
[30:51] | because I am dating your daughter, | 因为我正在和你的女儿交往 |
[30:52] | and I would really love to get your approval on this, | 而且我真的希望你能接受我们 |
[30:55] | but you, sir, are the red devil killer. | 但是 先生 你才是红衣恶魔 |
[31:00] | Chanel, Hester, | 香奈儿 海丝特 |
[31:02] | I’m really sorry about this. | 对此我感到十分抱歉 |
[31:03] | I personally don’t think these teams are fair, | 我个人认为这样组队并不公平 |
[31:05] | But honestly, I did warn you, | 但老实说 我警告过你们 |
[31:06] | So if this gets super awkward, it’s on you. | 如果情况变得特别尴尬 得怪你们自己 |
[31:09] | Good luck. | 祝好运 |
[31:09] | When next we speak, | 下次我们再说话时 |
[31:10] | it will be as adversaries. | 就是以敌对的身份了 |
[31:15] | Well, just a quick overview of the rules. | 我来做个简要概述 说说规则 |
[31:19] | You pick a card, | 选一张卡片 |
[31:20] | and then you draw the word on the board using little pictures. | 然后用画图案的方式将卡上的词画在板上 |
[31:23] | No talking or gesturing, | 不可以说话或比手势 |
[31:25] | And your team has to guess it before the time runs out. | 你们队必须在限定时间内猜出词语 |
[31:28] | Brad, why don’t you start us off? | 布莱德 你第一个上吧 |
[31:30] | Come on, Brad! Come on, Brad! | 加油 布莱德 加油 布莱德 |
[31:45] | Come on! You can do this! | 加油 你能做到 |
[31:47] | And… | 下面 |
[31:49] | Go. | 开始 |
[31:52] | Hester. | 海丝特 |
[31:54] | Homely, ugly. | 平庸 丑陋 |
[31:55] | Gold digger! Not welcome. | 傍款女 不受欢迎的 |
[31:57] | Unattractive short person. | 不招人喜欢的矮子 |
[32:00] | Poo belly. Is it poo belly? | 一肚子粪 是一肚子粪吗 |
[32:01] | I thought you couldn’t gesture? | 我觉得你们不该比手势吧 |
[32:02] | He wasn’t gesturing, he was pointing. | 他没比手势 他是在指 |
[32:05] | Doesn’t belong here. | 不属于这里 |
[32:07] | Should have left hours ago. | 几小时前就该走了 |
[32:10] | Bird. Turkey. | 鸟 火鸡 |
[32:11] | Turkey neck! Neck waddle. | 火鸡脖 火鸡步 |
[32:13] | Girl With a weird, big neck. | 长着大怪脖子的女孩 |
[32:17] | Neck brace! Neck brace! | 项圈 项圈 |
[32:19] | Yes! | 太好了 |
[32:20] | Come on, second word. | 加油 第二个词 |
[32:22] | Sounds like… | 感觉像是 |
[32:23] | That’s a gesture. | 那是比手势 |
[32:24] | That is a gesture. | 那是在比手势 |
[32:26] | Bed, bed, uh, bed, bed. | 床 床 床 床 |
[32:28] | Sounds like bed, uh, sleep. | 好像是床 睡觉 |
[32:29] | Dead! | 死了的 |
[32:30] | Dead neck brace girl. | 死了的项圈女孩 |
[32:32] | Overfed! | 吃撑了 |
[32:33] | Overfed girl with a neck brace. | 吃撑了的戴项圈女孩 |
[32:35] | No, no, too chunky to wear that outfit. | 不 不 臃肿得穿不进衣服 |
[32:38] | – Yeah? – No, no. | -对吗 -不 不 |
[32:39] | Sleeping. | 睡觉的 |
[32:41] | Snore. | 打鼾 |
[32:42] | Snore | 打鼾 |
[32:44] | Whore! | 婊子 |
[32:45] | Neck brace whore! | 项圈婊子 |
[32:50] | Neck brace whore! | 项圈婊子 |
[32:55] | I’m sorry, but someone needs to contact | 抱歉 不过该有人联系下 |
[32:57] | the good people at Hasbro, because the odds of you picking | 《孩之宝》公司的好人了 因为你们 |
[33:00] | neck brace whore are astronomical. | 有极小几率会选项圈婊子这个词 |
[33:03] | I’m fairly certain this board game’s been tampered with. | 我十分确定这个游戏已经变味儿了 |
[33:05] | Chanel, I don’t want to be, like, a rules sticker, | 香奈儿 我不想死抓着规矩不放 |
[33:07] | But teams are not really supposed to be conversing between rounds. | 不过游戏期间两队成员不能相互交流 |
[33:10] | You will not shut me up this time, Chad. | 这回你不能让我闭嘴 查德 |
[33:12] | I have something to say. | 我有话要说 |
[33:14] | Hester, | 海丝特 |
[33:16] | I owe you an apology. | 我欠你个道歉 |
[33:18] | Yes, I did push you down the stairs | 没错 我把你推下楼梯 |
[33:19] | in an attempt to murder you and your fake unborn baby. | 想要杀了你还有你那未出生且莫须有的孩子 |
[33:23] | And while my motivation were airtight and my consicious clear still… | 虽然我动机没错 良心也过得去… |
[33:27] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
[33:28] | You should on No.6 of my sister. | 你应该是我第六号姐妹 |
[33:30] | And that bond is stronger | 我们之间的纽带 |
[33:32] | than some silly little attempt on your life. | 比杀掉你的小欲望要强烈得多 |
[33:34] | Thank you. | 谢谢你 |
[33:35] | And furthermore, I’m sorry that you had to sit | 还有 我很抱歉你得耐着性子 |
[33:38] | through the most mean-spirited game of pictionary | 做完这个有史以来 |
[33:41] | in the history of pictionary. | 最卑鄙的看图说词游戏 |
[33:43] | I mean, no one deserves to be spoken to like that, | 谁都不应该被说成这样 |
[33:45] | particularly not by what is, without a doubt, | 尤其不该被这帮人说三道四 |
[33:47] | the most awful family in America. | 这帮人无疑是美国最烂的家庭 |
[33:50] | Chad, | 查德 |
[33:51] | your leathery excuse for a mother | 你妈鹤发鸡皮的 |
[33:53] | looks like an ostrich-hide clutch from last season | 就像上季那款鸵鸟皮手袋 |
[33:56] | that somehow learned to talk. | 突然学会了说话一样 |
[33:58] | And, Mr. Radwell, | 还有雷德威尔先生 |
[33:59] | I have never seen anyone spend so much money | 我从未见过有人花这么多钱 |
[34:01] | to make a house look this tacky. | 把房子装得这么俗气的 |
[34:03] | I’ve honestly seen more tasteful decor at a sizzler. | 我在时时乐餐厅都看过比这雅致的装饰 |
[34:06] | And you, Thad, | 还有你 撒德 |
[34:08] | have a bright future ahead of you | 你前程似锦啊 |
[34:10] | in the sex offender wing of a Supermax Prison. | 不过是在关性罪犯的重刑监狱 |
[34:13] | And you, sir, | 至于你呢 先生 |
[34:14] | Give the kind, | 令那些 |
[34:15] | hard-working, deeply moral people | 在好莱坞这样棒的行业工作的 |
[34:17] | who work in such a wonderful industry s Hollywood a bad name. | 善良刻苦道德高尚的人背上了恶名 |
[34:21] | And, Chad Radwell, | 查德·雷德威尔 |
[34:23] | Whatever we had between us | 不管我们之间曾有过什么 |
[34:24] | is over. | 都结束了 |
[34:26] | I am walking out that door | 我要走出那扇门 |
[34:28] | and never speaking to you again. | 我再也不会理你了 |
[34:30] | You know you say that a lot, right? | 你知道自己总是那么说 对吧 |
[34:32] | Well, consider this coming to my senses, | 就当我总算清醒了吧 |
[34:34] | because no woman in her right mind | 可没有脑子正常的女人 |
[34:36] | would want anything to do with this family. | 会想跟这样的家庭扯上关系 |
[34:39] | So good-bye, Chad. Good-bye forever. | 再见 查德 再也不见 |
[34:45] | Chanel, wait. | 香奈儿 等等 |
[34:47] | I’m coming with you. | 我和你一起走 |
[34:49] | – Really? – Yes, yes, yes, | -真的吗 -对对对 |
[34:51] | All I’ve ever wanted is to be your sister. | 我只想做你的姐妹 |
[34:53] | Fine. | 好 |
[34:54] | Let’s hit the road, Number Six. | 我们出发吧 六号 |
[34:56] | We’re going home. | 我们要回家了 |
[35:03] | Tiburon looks good. Just another ten minutes or so, I think. | 肉看着不错 再有十分钟左右就好 |
[35:06] | What’d I miss? | 我错过什么了 |
[35:07] | Pete was just about to ruin any chances of marrying Grace | 皮特正准备毁掉一切娶格蕾丝的可能 |
[35:09] | by explaining why he thinks her dad is the killer. | 他要解释为什么格蕾丝的爸爸是凶手 |
[35:11] | Grace, | 格蕾丝 |
[35:12] | this is really hard for me, | 这对我来说真的很难 |
[35:14] | but I’m an investigative journalist. | 但我是一名调查记者 |
[35:16] | So, like everyone else, I started with a motive. | 跟所有人一样 我从动机入手 |
[35:18] | Yours was easy, sir, ’cause you just | 而你的动机很容易被发现 先生 |
[35:20] | keep on repeating it over and over again. | 因为你自己一直在不停重复 |
[35:22] | More than anything, you want to keep Grace safe, | 保证格蕾丝的安全对你来说最为重要 |
[35:23] | and as far as you’re concerned, the most dangerous thing | 对你来说 她生活里最危险的事 |
[35:25] | in her life is Kappa Kappa Tau. | 莫过于KKT姐妹会 |
[35:28] | Now, you begged her not to join, | 你求她不要加入 |
[35:30] | but she didn’t listen, | 但她没听你的 |
[35:32] | so you had to find another way | 所以你得找别的办法 |
[35:34] | to keep her from becoming a sister, | 让她远离姐妹会 |
[35:35] | and what was the best way to do that? | 那最好的方法是什么呢 |
[35:39] | To get Dean Munsch to shut down the house. | 让蒙什教务长关闭公馆 |
[35:42] | And so you started killing sisters | 所以你就开始一个一个 |
[35:43] | left and right until she did, | 杀害姐妹会成员 直到她关闭公馆 |
[35:44] | but… you didn’t count on the small fact | 但是 你没有想到 |
[35:47] | that Dean Munsch over here is such a coldhearted bitch. | 蒙什教务长是一个冷血婊 |
[35:49] | Sorry I’m not sorry. | 抱歉我并不抱歉这么说 |
[35:50] | And the body count just kept rising and rising | 所以死掉的人就越来越多 |
[35:53] | until you finally got her to surrender | 直到她最终败下阵来 |
[35:55] | and shut the place down. | 关闭了公馆 |
[35:57] | But I could have just pulled her out of school | 但想到要杀人之前 |
[35:59] | or, hell, even burned the house down | 我本可以直接让她退学 |
[36:01] | before I would even consider killing people. | 或者烧了这公馆 |
[36:04] | Well, you certainly had the inside information to pull it off, | 但你绝对有内部消息得以达成此事 |
[36:07] | at least when it came to Roger and Sam. | 至少在罗杰和萨姆这事上能成 |
[36:09] | See, uh, I was looking over some of Kappa’s yearbooks | 我在查阅一些卡帕的纪念册 |
[36:12] | from the time of the bathtub incident, | 从浴缸事件发生之时起 |
[36:14] | and I came across something both interesting | 我发现了一些非常有趣但又 |
[36:17] | and deeply disturbing. | 让人深深不安的东西 |
[36:19] | Your freshman year, Mr. Gardner, | 你大一的时候 加德纳先生 |
[36:21] | Kappa had a special night | 卡帕有一个特别的夜晚 |
[36:23] | called The Secret Kappa Tunnel Rager, | 叫作”卡帕秘密隧道狂欢” |
[36:25] | in which they brought down kegs into the secret Kappa tunnels | 那晚他们会带上酒去卡帕的秘密隧道 |
[36:29] | and they did a huge party. | 然后举行盛大的派对 |
[36:30] | Well, there’s pictures from that night and the party. | 有很多那晚派对上的照片 |
[36:33] | Please take a look at who was there. | 看看这是谁 |
[36:38] | How could such a stud evolve from a boy | 这样明显的一个白痴男孩 |
[36:40] | who was so clearly a douche. | 是怎么变成一匹”种马”的 |
[36:42] | So you’re saying if he knew about the tunnel, | 你是说如果他知道隧道 |
[36:44] | then he could’ve snuck into the house | 那么那晚我们关在屋里时 |
[36:45] | the night we were all locked in. | 他就可能偷偷进入公馆 |
[36:48] | Yeah. | 没错 |
[36:49] | Please, look, I-I was so bombed at that party. | 拜托 那派对上我醉得一塌糊涂 |
[36:52] | I mean, I remember I puked | 我还记得跟一个姑娘亲热时 |
[36:55] | while I was making out with some girl, | 还没忍住吐了 |
[36:56] | but there is no way | 而且当时的状态 |
[36:57] | that I could’ve found my way back down there | 我绝不可能二十分钟后还能找到回去的路 |
[36:59] | 20 minutes later, let alone 20 years. | 更别说过了二十年了 |
[37:02] | That wasn’t enough for me, either. | 对我来说这理由也不够充分 |
[37:04] | So I kept on digging. | 所以我继续调查 |
[37:05] | See, I couldn’t | 我也想不明白 |
[37:06] | figure out how the bodies | 冷藏室里的尸体 |
[37:08] | in the meat locker | 到底为什么会 |
[37:08] | just kept disappearing. | 一直失踪 |
[37:10] | So I tapped into the secret cameras | 我就接进了香奈儿 |
[37:12] | Chanel had installed all over the house. | 在公馆各处安装的摄像头 |
[37:14] | And you, sir, | 而你 先生 |
[37:16] | are in the footage. | 正出现在监控录像中 |
[37:21] | Dad, | 爸爸 |
[37:22] | why would you do that? | 你为什么要那么做 |
[37:24] | This is really embarrassing, | 这真的很丢人 |
[37:27] | but I started the Paleo diet, | 我开始了原始人饮食法 |
[37:28] | because I’m back on the dating scene now, | 因为又开始约会了 |
[37:30] | and I-I wanted to lose some weight. | 我就想减些体重 |
[37:32] | But I’m on a teacher’s salary, and I can’t afford meat, | 但我拿的是教师薪水 买不起那么多肉 |
[37:34] | and that freezer, | 而那个冷藏室里 |
[37:35] | it’s got chicken, burgers, ribs, | 有鸡肉 牛肉 排骨 |
[37:37] | there’s whole sides of beef | 还有整块儿的牛肉 |
[37:38] | just hanging on hooks, and you girls don’t even eat. | 就挂在钩子上 而姑娘们根本不吃 |
[37:41] | So I figured I’d just make sure | 所以我想我要确保 |
[37:42] | that none of it went to waste. | 这些东西不被浪费 |
[37:46] | I’ll return it. | 我会还回来的 |
[37:49] | I never saw a body down there. | 我从未在那儿见到过尸体 |
[37:52] | I actually have noticed you leaning out a bit. | 其确实注意到你有瘦一些 |
[37:54] | You look good. | 看起来很帅 |
[37:55] | Paleo diet. It works. | 原始人饮食法 确实有用 |
[37:57] | Paleo. | 原始人 |
[37:58] | None of that | 这些都不能 |
[37:59] | prepared me | 让我对接下来的发现 |
[38:00] | for what I discovered next. | 做好准备 |
[38:02] | See, uh, | 你看 |
[38:03] | I’m buddies with the county coroner. | 我是郡法医的好朋友 |
[38:05] | Him and my brother used to sell | 他和我哥哥过去在高中 |
[38:06] | illegal fireworks in high school. | 一起卖过非法烟花 |
[38:08] | I bribed him with a bag of weed | 我用一包大麻贿赂了他 |
[38:10] | to get some of Boone’s hair. | 得到了一些布恩的头发 |
[38:12] | This is the part I’m kind of ashamed of. | 这是让我觉得很羞愧的地方 |
[38:15] | Wait a minute, there’s a part | 等下 还有比 |
[38:17] | other than bribing a government official with drugs | 用毒品贿赂政府官员 |
[38:19] | so that you can steal the hair of a dead man | 以窃取一个死人的头发 |
[38:21] | that you’re ashamed of? | 还要羞愧的事情吗 |
[38:22] | Well, I-I kind of snuck into Mr. Gardner’s apartment | 我偷偷潜入了加德纳先生的公寓 |
[38:26] | to get some hair from his brush, | 从他的梳子上拿到了一些头发 |
[38:28] | and I have a friend who works at the Maury Show, | 我有一个朋友在莫里访谈工作 |
[38:30] | and I got him to run a quickie DNA test, and… | 我让他做了个快速DNA检测 |
[38:35] | I’m sorry to say, Mr. Gardner, | 很抱歉 加德纳先生 |
[38:37] | but you are the father. | 但你是他的父亲 |
[38:40] | What? I’m-I’m sorry. | 什么 等一下 |
[38:41] | My dad is Boone’s father? | 我爸爸是布恩的父亲吗 |
[38:44] | – Oh, my god. – Dad? | -天啊 -爸 |
[38:45] | Honey, Grace, I swear I had… | 格蕾丝 亲爱的 我发誓我 |
[38:47] | I had no idea. | 我毫不知情 |
[38:49] | I mean, it’s not out of the question. | 我是说 这不是不可能 |
[38:51] | I-I was a bit of a man slut back in the day, | 过去我差不多是个男婊 |
[38:53] | And it was the ’90s, so nobody wore condoms. | 在当时的90年代 没有人会带套做 |
[38:55] | Trust me. | 确实 |
[38:57] | Which probably means | 也就是说 |
[38:59] | You’re also the father of the other baby in the bathtub. | 你很可能也是浴缸里另一个婴儿的爸爸 |
[39:01] | I’m sorry, Mr. Gardner, | 真不好意思 加德纳先生 |
[39:02] | but this is what they call an orgy of evidence. | 可这就是所谓的证据确凿 |
[39:07] | I’m obligated to take it to the police. | 我有义务把证据递交给警方 |
[39:11] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
[39:31] | I didn’t know. | 我毫不知情 |
[39:33] | I swear. | 我发誓 |
[39:35] | And if I had, I would’ve taken responsibility. | 我要是知道 那我肯定会对其负责 |
[39:38] | Of course you would have. | 我相信你肯定会 |
[39:42] | Pete’s not gonna call the police. | 皮特不会去报警的 |
[39:44] | I told him that you’re my dad | 我告诉他 你是我爸 |
[39:46] | and I know you. | 我了解你 |
[39:48] | I mean, those are my kids out there, | 逍遥法外的可是我的孩子 |
[39:50] | killing all those people. | 杀了那么多人 |
[39:51] | Which is why we, more than anyone, | 所以该由我们 而不是其他人 |
[39:53] | have to do everything we can to find them and stop them. | 尽全力找到他们并且阻止他们继续杀人 |
[39:56] | You think you could do it in the moment? | 你觉得你能下得了手吗 |
[40:00] | Send your brother or your sister off to the chair? | 亲手把你的兄弟姐妹送上电椅 |
[40:03] | Maybe even kill them yourself? | 还是亲手杀了他们 |
[40:05] | To save my friends or you, | 为了拯救我的朋友和你 |
[40:08] | Yes. | 没错 |
[40:10] | They are my blood, | 虽然他们与我同血脉 |
[40:12] | but you and Zayday and even the Chanels, | 可你和扎丹 还有香奈儿们 |
[40:15] | all of the people who I have suffered through all of this with, | 乃至和我共同熬过这段时期的所有人 |
[40:18] | you are my family. | 你们才是我的家人 |
[40:21] | A highly dysfunctional family, | 虽然这个家庭极为奇葩 |
[40:23] | but… still. | 可我们仍旧是一家人 |
[40:28] | Come here. | 来抱抱 |
[40:36] | What about everyone else? | 那其他人呢 |
[40:37] | I mean, there are some pretty compelling cases being made | 毕竟还是有许多极具说服力的推理 |
[40:39] | that someone down there is the killer. | 指出楼下的某个人是凶手 |
[40:41] | Which is why no one is going to the police about any of it. | 所以才没有一个人站出来报警 |
[40:44] | And all tonight did was prove that at this point, | 今晚推理了那么多 只能证明一件事 |
[40:47] | it could be anyone, | 任何人都可能是凶手 |
[40:48] | except you and me, of course. | 当然了 除了你和我之外 |
[40:50] | Oh, no, totally, totally. | 没错 没错 |
[40:52] | Five minutes to turkey time. | 还有五分钟就能吃火鸡了 |
[40:54] | I just checked the timer personally. | 我刚亲自去看了下定时器 |
[40:56] | Good. | 好 |
[40:57] | And then Chad’s dad offered me $50,000 | 然后查德他爸提出要给我五万块 |
[41:00] | to leave and never come back. | 让我离开 别再缠着查德 |
[41:02] | That’s amazing. | 太棒了 |
[41:03] | What are you gonna do with the money? | 那你打算怎么花这笔钱 |
[41:04] | I didn’t take the money, idiot. | 我没收下钱好吗 白痴 |
[41:07] | Okay, well, | 好吧 |
[41:09] | You already left, so, basically, | 可你已经离开了 所以说 |
[41:10] | you’re out $50,000 for no reason. | 你无缘无故就少了五万块 |
[41:12] | Chanel #3 and I are thrilled to announce | 我和香奈儿三号非常高兴地宣布 |
[41:15] | that Tiburon is ready to be served. | 蒂布龙可以准备上桌了 |
[41:18] | Uh, Chanel, would you at least | 香奈儿 你能不能至少 |
[41:20] | please give the illusion of trying to help? | 表现得想要帮忙一下吗 |
[41:22] | Okay, first of all, I experienced | 首先 今晚我的感情 |
[41:24] | extreme emotional trauma this evening, | 受到了极大的心理创伤 |
[41:26] | and second, I’m the one delegating tasks, | 其次 我才是负责指挥的好吗 |
[41:29] | thank you very much. | 谢谢配合 |
[41:30] | It’s the most important job there is. | 这可是最为重要的工作 |
[41:32] | Plus, I’m saving my energy | 再者 我要省着点体力 |
[41:34] | for Black Friday doorbusters tomorrow morning. | 明天一大早秒杀黑五打折商品 |
[41:36] | Ladies, excuse me, please. I’m gonna go freshen up. | 女士们 失陪一下 我先去梳洗一番 |
[41:40] | What took you so long? | 你怎么这么久才来 |
[41:42] | I couldn’t find any matches. | 我找不到火柴 |
[41:44] | Thought there would be some in Jennifer’s room. | 想着詹妮弗的房间里可能有 |
[41:45] | But I ended up finding this in the downstairs bathroom. | 可最后我在楼下的卫生间找到了这个 |
[41:49] | And what happened to you? | 你又是去干什么了 |
[41:50] | I was sharpening this knife. | 我在打磨这把菜刀 |
[41:51] | I couldn’t find Ms. Bean’s carver, | 我找不到贝恩女士的屠肉刀 |
[41:53] | but this one is definitely sharp enough | 不过这一把也足够锋利了 |
[41:54] | to glide easily through roasted flesh. | 可以轻易地切下肉 |
[41:56] | What a weird way to put that. | 这话听着真渗人 |
[41:59] | Great, it’s you two. | 太好了 是你们俩 |
[42:00] | You’re gonna make fabulous dinner guests | 你们将会是最棒的晚宴贵客 |
[42:02] | Now that you found out you fathered a bastard murderer, | 因为你刚知道你养了个混蛋杀人犯 |
[42:04] | who’s your sibling. | 也是你的兄弟 |
[42:07] | As you can imagine, | 相信你也知道 |
[42:08] | it’s been sort of a heavy day for me. | 今天对我来说有点难熬 |
[42:09] | So if you wouldn’t mind, | 所以你不介意的话 |
[42:11] | I would love for us all to have a quiet, | 我希望我们能共同度过一个安静 |
[42:13] | uneventful thanksgiving. Thank you. | 而又平凡的感恩节 谢谢 |
[42:17] | Come on, let’s bring in Tiburon. | 走吧 我们去把蒂布龙端来 |
[42:21] | Weston, | 韦斯顿 |
[42:21] | is your crazy girlfriend attending? | 你那奇葩女友来吗 |
[42:23] | Because if so, I need to set a place for her. | 来的话 我就得再给她加个位子 |
[42:25] | No, no, because I have no idea where Gigi is. | 不用了 因为我也不知道琪琪在哪 |
[42:31] | Chad? | 查德 |
[42:33] | You haven’t eaten yet, have you? | 你还没吃过饭吧 |
[42:34] | I knew it! You’ve come back. You’ve chosen me | 我就知道你会回来 你会选择我 |
[42:36] | over your awful family. | 而不是选择你那糟糕一家 |
[42:38] | Hold up. | 等等 |
[42:40] | First of all, my family is awesome. How dare you? | 首先 我家人都超赞的 你好大的胆子 |
[42:42] | And second, yeah, I did come back, but it’s only because | 其次 没错我是回来了 可那只是因为 |
[42:45] | I knew you’d have turkey here, | 我知道你这儿有火鸡 |
[42:46] | so I thought I’d get my turkey on with you. | 就想着应该能和你一起吃火鸡 |
[42:49] | I’m sorry I said that. | 之前言重了 真是抱歉 |
[42:54] | What’s up, guys? | 你们好啊 |
[42:57] | You know, I really thought this bird would be a lot heavier. | 我原以为这只火鸡不可能只有这么轻 |
[43:01] | Dean Munsch, you must have really overcooked the turkey. | 蒙什教务长 你的火鸡肯定烤过头了 |
[43:03] | That’s nonsense. | 胡扯 |
[43:04] | Tiburon is perfectly cooked. | 蒂布龙烤得恰到火候 |
[43:06] | Okay, I hope everyone’s hungry | 好了 但愿大家都已经饿了 |
[43:08] | because I, for one, am overjoyed at this. | 因为我自己对这一切无比欣慰 |
[43:12] | I mean, look, it’s our first Kappa thanksgiving. | 这可是卡帕公馆的第一次感恩节聚会 |
[43:14] | So, without further ado, | 那么言归正传 |
[43:17] | dinner is served. | 开吃吧 |