英文名称：I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell
年代：2009
推荐：千部英美剧台词本阅读
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | Attention all units, | 各单位注意 |
| [00:07] | attack in progress at 742 Summit drive. | 顶点路742号有暴力事件 |
| [00:10] | 742 Summit drive. | 顶点路742号 |
| [00:12] | Screaming heard from inside the residence. Respond, code three. | 屋里传出惊叫声 收到请回话 |
| [00:15] | Five-four-three-zero, show us responding. | 5430号 收到 |
| [00:18] | We’ll be on scene in under a minute. | 我们立即赶到现场 |
| [00:20] | Additional person reporting sound of animal abuse. | 还有人听到虐待动物的声音 |
| [00:22] | Hit it, man. Let’s go. | 收到 出发 |
| [00:33] | What the hell is that? | 那到底是什么声音 |
| [00:34] | Five-four-three-o, request backup. | 5430号 请求支援 |
| [00:36] | It’s here. | 在这里 |
| [00:42] | Stop. Put your hands up and move away. | 别动 举起双手离开那里 |
| [00:45] | I said, move away. | 我说快点放开她 |
| [00:47] | I said, move away. | 我说了 放开她 |
| [00:49] | – Miss, it’s okay. – What the fuck? | -小姐 没事了 -操 你要干吗 |
| [00:52] | I’m coming. I’m coming. | 我要高潮了 我要高潮了 |
| [00:54] | What are you doing, man? What’s going on? | 你们在干什么 到底怎么了 |
| [00:57] | I didn’t do anything. What are you talking about? | 我什么都没干 你们在说什么 |
| [00:59] | Get your hands behind your back. | 把双手放在背后 |
| [01:01] | I am deaf. Can you hear me? | 我失聪了 听见我说什么了吗 |
| [01:03] | – Hey, partner. – What? | -哥们 -怎么了 |
| [01:05] | – You gotta look at this. – I am deaf. | -你过来看一下 -我是个聋子 |
| [01:07] | – Fuck. – We don’t have a crime here. | -操 -我们搞错了 |
| [01:09] | He wasn’t raping me, he was fucking me. You know, fucking. | 他没强奸我 我们在做爱 懂吗 操 |
| [01:14] | Goddamn. | 该死的 |
| [01:15] | I was about to come. | 我正要高潮呢 |
| [01:16] | 我希望在地狱里仍有酒喝 | |
| [01:24] | 很不幸的是 根据真实故事改编 | |
| [01:50] | You ever fuck a deaf chick? | 你和聋子妓女做过爱吗 |
| [01:53] | Of course not. | 绝对没有 |
| [01:55] | – Are you getting excited? – Are you nervous? | -你觉得兴奋吗 -你紧张吗 |
| [01:57] | You only have nine days left. | 你只剩下九天了 |
| [01:59] | No, I’m not nervous, but…. | 不 倒不是紧张 只是 |
| [02:01] | I tell you what, this wedding planning stuff is unreal. | 我只是觉得婚礼的筹备不太实际 |
| [02:03] | I spent last night, all last night… | 我昨晚一整夜 |
| [02:05] | looking at books and magazines of white flowers. | 在书里和杂志里来寻找白花 |
| [02:08] | Just white. | 纯白的花 |
| [02:09] | I love big weddings. | 我喜欢盛大的婚礼 |
| [02:10] | I don’t know how people do it. | 不知道别人是怎么做的 |
| [02:12] | I’m just gonna elope. | 我只想摆脱这些 |
| [02:14] | Yeah? I was unaware that gay marriages were legal in this state. | 同性恋婚姻在本州合法了 |
| 本电影台词包含不重复单词：1779个。 其中的生词包含：四级词汇：286个，六级词汇：160个，GRE词汇：191个，托福词汇：241个，考研词汇：334个，专四词汇：280个，专八词汇：61个， 所有生词标注共：707个。 定制生词标注的台词本和单词统计，请访问生词标注台词本 | ||
| [02:19] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [02:20] | Raise your hand if you’ve ever fucked a deaf girl. | 和失聪的女孩做过爱的请举手 |
| [02:25] | Bullshit. You hooked up with a deaf girl? | 不是吧 你搞了一个聋子吗 |
| [02:27] | What, you’re deaf now too? | 当然 你也聋了吗 |
| [02:29] | Yeah, Dan, I had sex with a deaf girl. | 没错 丹 我和聋子上床了 |
| [02:36] | Didn’t you hook up with a mute girl last semester? | 上次期你不是上了个哑巴吗 |
| [02:39] | That makes you two-thirds of the way to a Helen Keller. | 你快赶上海伦・凯勒了 |
| [02:41] | Dude, you have no idea. She was crazy. | 你绝对想不到她有多猛 |
| [02:46] | I almost shit myself when | 当条子撞进来的时候 |
| [02:47] | those cops busted in. I thought she set me up. | 我正要射呢 我以为是她陷害我 |
| [02:50] | Mr. Max. | 麦克斯先生 |
| [02:51] | What is your take on this issue? | 这起纠纷你怎么看 |
| [02:53] | I’m sorry, what issue is that? | 抱歉 是什么纠纷 |
| [02:55] | Are you not paying attention Mr. Max? | 你没在听讲吗 麦克斯先生 |
| [02:57] | No, I wasn’t. I apologize. | 没有 非常抱歉 |
| [02:58] | I was busy talking about having sex with a deaf girl. | 我正忙着聊和聋子做爱的事呢 |
| [03:02] | Charming. | 真有意思 |
| [03:04] | And oddly appropriate. | 只是有些不合时宜 |
| [03:06] | Do you or do you not feel | 你是否觉得 |
| [03:07] | that little people should be a protected class? | 个子小的人应该归入受保护群体 |
| [03:10] | You mean midgets? | 你是说侏儒吗 |
| [03:11] | No, Mr. Max, I do not mean midgets. I mean little people. | 不是侏儒 我是说小个子的人 |
| [03:14] | “Midget” is an antiquated and pejorative term. | “侏儒”是一个迂腐且带有歧视性的词 |
| [03:17] | What are we protecting them from, eagles and poachers and stuff? | 保护他们不受老鹰或偷猎者的侵害吗 |
| [03:21] | Like an endangered species? | 就像对待濒临灭绝的物种那样 |
| [03:22] | Really? Poachers? | 猎人 真的吗 |
| [03:23] | Mr. Max, if you didn’t do the reading… | 麦克斯先生 如果你没看过案情 |
| [03:25] | Well, sir, dwarfism is already | 侏儒症患者已经 |
| [03:28] | a protected class under the ADA. | 受到了美国残疾人协会的保护 |
| [03:29] | So your point is kind of moot. | 所以您的问题没有任何意义 |
| [03:31] | Now, if you’re asking me if I agree, I’m not sure. | 如果您想问我是否赞成的话 我不确定 |
| [03:33] | Because there are so many kinds of little people. | 因为矮个子的人包含很多种类 |
| [03:36] | There are the ones who are just proportionally | 有的只是身高略矮 |
| [03:37] | shorter and might don’t need a booster seat at their cubicle. | 但他们的卧室里不需要加高椅 |
| [03:40] | There are those dwarves with | 也有些侏儒症患者 |
| [03:41] | giant heads and flipper arms | 头部硕大双臂短小 |
| [03:43] | who can barely walk. | 他们甚至没法走路 |
| [03:44] | Now, is there a reasonable | 但是如果某些雇主 |
| [03:45] | accommodation an employer can make for those types… | 专门为了迁就这些人 |
| [03:48] | …who doesn’t automatically qualify him | 而破例给他们 |
| [03:49] | for the business necessity exception? | 提供职位的话 |
| [03:51] | I don’t think so. | 我认为没必要 |
| [03:53] | Then where do you draw the line? | 那你认为该如何区分呢 |
| [03:55] | I figure it’s like riding a roller coaster. | 我觉得就像坐过山车一样 |
| [03:57] | You must be this high to get ADA protection. | 你必须到这么高才能受到保护 |
| [04:01] | Very funny, Mr. Max. | 非常有趣 麦克斯先生 |
| [04:03] | What if I told you I just finished a pro bono case… | 如果说我刚完成了一起义务诉讼 |
| [04:06] | …that involved a gentlemen’s club that tried to terminate… | 一家色情夜总会解雇了一名侏儒舞女 |
| [04:09] | …the employment of a dancer with dwarfism because she… | 原因是她 |
| [04:12] | You represented a midget stripper? | 你代表侏儒舞女上庭了是吗 |
| [04:15] | – Was she hot? – Mr. Max. | -她是不是超辣 -麦克斯先生 |
| [04:19] | If you’re genuinely interested in the case, | 如果你真的对本案感兴趣 |
| [04:21] | come to office hours and I’ll fill you in. | 答疑时间来找我 我可以告诉你案情 |
| [04:24] | In the meantime, let’s | 不过现在 |
| [04:25] | remember that this is an employment law class… | 我们现在上的是劳动法课 |
| [04:28] | …not adult friend finder. | 而不是成人交友 |
| [04:31] | Touche, I will shut up now. | 说得是 我闭嘴 |
| [04:35] | Dude, so you ready for your bachelor party tonight or what? | 你为今晚的单身派对做好准备了吗 |
| [04:39] | Locked and loaded. | 随时待命 |
| [04:40] | Good. I’m gonna go get Drew. | 很好 我先去找德鲁 |
| [04:42] | Meet us at the campus bar after class. | 下课后来学校酒吧找我们 |
| [04:45] | Oh, I guess I’ll just finish up here for you. Jackass. | 蠢货 我还是替你把这里的课听完吧 |
| [04:53] | Energy sword. Who uses a fucking energy sword? | 聚能剑 谁他妈要聚能剑 |
| [05:07] | Pick up that energy sword one more time, | 如果你再敢捡聚能剑的话 |
| [05:09] | I am going to rape you with it. | 老子就用它爆你菊花 |
| [05:16] | Yo, Drew, it’s Tucker. | 德鲁 我是塔克 |
| [05:18] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么 |
| [05:19] | Punishing unethical behavior. | 替天行道 |
| [05:22] | All right. Well, I’m coming to get you, man. | 好吧 我一会过来找你 |
| [05:23] | We’re going drinking. | 一起去喝酒 |
| [05:26] | Here comes your object lesson. | 下面是实物教学课 |
| [05:28] | Gained the lead. | 爆头加分 |
| [05:38] | Fucker. | 妈的 |
| [05:48] | “她的”变成了”哪去了” | |
| [05:58] | Are those tampons? | 这些是卫生棉吗 |
| [06:00] | Fuck. | 妈的 |
| [06:02] | “Take whatever you want. Her box is apparently open to all.” | 她箱子里的东西任君挑选 |
| [06:06] | Jesus. | 老天 |
| [06:11] | Wow, look at this place. It’s a shrine to cuckoldry and rage. | 看看这里 真是太适合通奸和乱搞了 |
| [06:20] | You ready, dude? | 准备好了吗 |
| [06:23] | What are you talking about? | 你说什么呢 |
| [06:26] | We’re going to the bar. I told you. | 我们要去酒吧 不是告诉你了吗 |
| [06:28] | I don’t actually listen to what you say. | 我刚才压根没听你说话 |
| [06:30] | I just wait for you to stop | 我听自言自语结束之后 |
| [06:32] | talking about yourself, get bored and hang up. | 觉得无聊 就挂了电话 |
| [06:38] | Did Sarah call yet? | 莎拉给你打电话了吗 |
| [06:40] | No. She probably has trouble talking with a dick in her mouth. | 没有 估计她正忙着给谁口交呢 |
| [06:44] | Fuck, man. | 靠 |
| [06:46] | This cartoon is disturbingly hot. | 这动画片太销魂了 |
| [06:48] | Can you imagine a threesome with these two? | 你能想象和这两个人3P是什么感觉吗 |
| [06:50] | I can imagine them both cheating on me. | 我能想像她们联合起来骗我 |
| [06:53] | They’re cartoons, dude. | 这是动画 拜托 |
| [06:54] | Oh, I’m on to your game. De Nils. | 我被你骗了 得尼尔森 |
| [06:57] | Diamonds are worthless, other than the value attached to them… | 钻石本身是没有价值的 |
| [07:01] | …by the silly tramps you’ve | 只有当你愚蠢的被洗脑之后 |
| [07:02] | brainwashed into thinking diamond equals love. | 你才会觉得钻石就等于爱情 |
| [07:05] | Guess what, sluts. | 你猜怎么着 妓女 |
| [07:06] | Your quest for the perfect | 你对完美女性的追求 |
| [07:07] | princess cut supports terrorism and genocide. | 转变成了对恐怖主义和种族屠杀的支持 |
| [07:10] | Congratulations, your avarice | 恭喜你 你的贪婪 |
| [07:12] | has managed to destroy the entire continent. | 毁掉了整片大陆 |
| [07:18] | Sarah kept the ring? | 莎拉没还你戒指吧 |
| [07:20] | I hope you die in a fire. | 你怎么不被火烧死 |
| [07:23] | You act like you’re the first person to ever get cheated on. | 别以为你是世界上第一个带绿帽子的人 |
| [07:26] | It happens to everybody, even me. | 每个人都有过 我也一样 |
| [07:28] | Oh, yeah? Does everyone | 真的吗 每个人都有过进屋后发现 |
| [07:30] | walk in on their fiance sucking off a rapper? | 自己的未婚妻在给说唱男口交的经历吗 |
| [07:33] | Honey, your throat feeling any? | 亲爱的你嗓子好些了吗 |
| [07:35] | How they do. | 他们怎么做的 |
| [07:37] | Yeah, buddy. Grillionaire in the house. | 你好 我是吉利内尔 |
| [07:40] | Hey, who knew blowjobs were good for sore throats, right? | 也许口交对嗓子有好处吧 |
| [07:44] | The most rewarding part of our friendship… | 我们的友情最珍贵的地方 |
| [07:48] | …is your ability to | 就是你们总能够在 |
| [07:49] | find amusement in the destruction of my life. | 摧毁我的同时找到乐趣 |
| [07:51] | It’s not that bad, dude. | 没那么糟 哥们 |
| [07:54] | You always get stuck in these cycles. | 你怎么总是纠结于这种问题 |
| [07:56] | When you get depressed like this… | 当你感到失落时 |
| [07:58] | …you need to ask yourself, | 你该问问自己 |
| [07:59] | “What would Tucker do?” | 换做塔克会怎样 |
| [08:01] | and then you go out and you do that. | 然后你就释然了 |
| [08:04] | I already know what you would do. | 我已经知道你会怎么做了 |
| [08:06] | And I have no desire to get HIV from one of the cum dumpsters… | 你每周末要和大众情人做爱 |
| [08:09] | …into whom you shoot your emotional pain every weekend. | 我可没兴趣再和她们做爱再染上艾滋 |
| [08:14] | HIV is basically curable now. | 现在艾滋病是可以治愈的 |
| [08:15] | It doesn’t even show up in | 魔术师约翰逊的血液里已经 |
| [08:17] | Magic Johnson’s blood anymore. | 检测不出艾滋病毒了 |
| [08:19] | Are you saying that Magic Johnson | 你是想说魔术师约翰逊 |
| [08:22] | is black and has aids… | 这个携带艾滋病毒的黑人 |
| [08:25] | …and has it better than me? | 他的情况比我好吗 |
| [08:30] | Yeah, I love children. You know, I wanna– | 我喜欢小孩 真的 |
| [08:32] | Yeah, when I graduate I | 等我毕业了我就想 |
| [08:33] | wanna work with them, have a bunch of my own. | 自己生好多小孩 |
| [08:35] | – Really? – Yeah, what about you? | -真的吗 -真的 你呢 |
| [08:37] | Are you kidding me? I love kids. | 你开玩笑吗 我也很喜欢小孩 |
| [08:39] | I can’t wait to have more. | 我非常想要小孩 |
| [08:40] | Shut up, you don’t have kids. | 胡说 你没有小孩 |
| [08:42] | – Yep. I do. -no, you don’t. | -我有的 -你没有 |
| [08:43] | He does. They’re just all | 他有小孩的 只不过 |
| [08:45] | in the compost heap behind planned parenthood. | 都是不小心中标生下来的 |
| [08:48] | If you do stem-cell research, you can work with them. | 如果你研究干细胞的话可以找他们 |
| [08:52] | All right, this is my boy. | 好了 我兄弟来了 |
| [08:53] | Run along, baby, man talk. | 你先去忙 我们要聊聊 |
| [08:55] | – All right. – I got your number, I’ll call you. | -好的 -我有你电话 回头再联系 |
| [08:57] | Perhaps. | 或许吧 |
| [08:59] | Who says romance is dead? | 谁说浪漫绝迹了 |
| [09:01] | How can you hate women… | 你怎么能在痛恨女性的时候 |
| [09:02] | …yet at the same time be mad at what tucker does? | 还反感塔克的所作所为呢 |
| [09:05] | It makes no sense. | 这说不通的 |
| [09:06] | I am like a feminist. | 我就像个女权主义者 |
| [09:07] | I can assert multiple contradictory positions. | 我同时站在多个矛盾的立场 |
| [09:11] | Do me a favor. Can you not talk | 帮个忙 请你们不要再 |
| [09:12] | to my server like that? | 对我的服务员那样说话了 |
| [09:14] | It’s disrespectful, okay? | 那样很没有礼貌 |
| [09:17] | Excuse me? | 你说什么 |
| [09:18] | Yeah, I think you heard me. | 你听清楚我的话了 |
| [09:19] | Oh, I heard you, hero. | 我听到了 大英雄 |
| [09:20] | You don’t want me flirting with your server. | 你讨厌我和你的服务员调情 |
| [09:23] | I didn’t know she belonged to you. | 我真不知道她是你的女人 |
| [09:25] | It’s a figure of speech. | 我话中有话的 |
| [09:26] | Here’s another figure of speech: mind your own fucking business. | 那我也话中有话 还是多担心你自己吧 |
| [09:30] | I’m sorry I’ve accomplished more with leslie in 30 minutes… | 我30分钟搞定了你了用两年 |
| [09:33] | than you have in two years, | 都没搞定的莱丝莉 真是抱歉 |
| [09:34] | but she looked happy talking to me. | 可她更喜欢和我聊天 |
| [09:36] | Or maybe she rubs her crotch against all customers. | 当然也许她对每个顾客都发骚 |
| [09:39] | – Probably. – It’s time for you to leave. | -有可能 -你们该走了 |
| [09:41] | Maybe It’s time for you to get us another drink. | 或许你应该给我们再来一杯 |
| [09:43] | Yeah, I don’t think so, man. | 我不这么认为 朋友 |
| [09:45] | Could you just go ahead | 你再去拿一杯 |
| [09:46] | and put this on my tab, please? Thank you. | 这杯记在我账上可以吗 谢谢 |
| [09:48] | Can you get me another beer for…? | 你能帮我再拿一杯 |
| [09:50] | – Actually, another two beers for table six. – Last one. | -给6号桌再拿两杯啤酒 -最后一杯 |
| [09:53] | All right. Three beers for table six. Thanks. | 算了 6号桌三杯 谢谢 |
| [09:56] | What the eff, leslie? | 搞什么飞机 莱丝莉 |
| [09:59] | Okay, come on, fuck stick. Let’s do this. | 好吧 他妈的 就这么着吧 |
| [10:01] | You’re gonna fuck this girl, pal. | 她肯定会同意和你上床的 |
| [10:06] | You think you’re tough? | 你觉得自己很壮吗 |
| [10:08] | No. | 不 |
| [10:09] | Just tougher than you. | 只是比你壮点 |
| [10:11] | Tell your friend I know Brazilian Jiujutsu. | 告诉你朋友我会巴西摔角 |
| [10:13] | He wants to make out. | 我朋友倒想见识一下 |
| [10:20] | Why is he twitching? | 他脸怎么抽搐了 |
| [10:22] | Listen, we need to discuss a change of venue for your party. | 我们得改个地方聚会了 |
| [10:25] | This should be good. | 这里挺好的 |
| [10:27] | No, seriously, | 才怪 说真的 |
| [10:28] | the strip club we’re supposed to go to sucks. | 我们先前说的脱衣舞厅很差 |
| [10:29] | It’s dirty and decrepit… | 又脏又旧 |
| [10:31] | …and the girls don’t have straight marks and | 那里的姑娘一点都不直接 |
| [10:32] | personalities like the worst parts of the bible. | 人品也糟糕透了 |
| [10:34] | Personalities? Are you saying we have to talk to them? | 人品 还得和她们聊天吗 |
| [10:38] | Some of us actually enjoy the company of women, Drew. | 有人可喜欢和女人聊天了 德鲁 |
| [10:40] | Oh, yeah, I’m the misogynist here. Okay. | 没错 反正我讨厌女人 |
| [10:44] | It wouldn’t even be an issue if Richmond | 如果里士满没有那个禁止乱摸脱衣女郎的 |
| [10:46] | hadn’t passed the stupid no-touching-strippers ordinance. | 垃圾法令的话 就什么事都没有了 |
| [10:48] | Wait a second. You wanna touch them now? | 等等 你又想摸那些脱衣舞女了吗 |
| [10:50] | You said they’re disgusting. | 你刚还说她们很恶心 |
| [10:51] | Well, what do you wanna do, Dan? Play checkers? | 那你们想干什么 下棋吗 |
| [10:54] | This is a fucking bachelor party. | 这他妈的可是单身派对 |
| [10:56] | What did you have in mind? | 你有什么计划 |
| [10:57] | All right. Thank you very much. | 好的 谢谢你们 |
| [10:59] | A short three-and-a-half | 只需三个半小时车程 |
| [11:01] | hour drive away is a strip club called “AVARICE”. | 有家名叫”贪婪”的脱衣舞厅 |
| [11:04] | You know what, I’m sorry, let me back that up. | 抱歉 请允许我进一步说明 |
| [11:06] | This isn’t just some strip club. | 这不是一般的脱衣舞厅 |
| [11:08] | This is the super bowl of carnal pleasures. | 这可是超级的肉欲享受 |
| [11:10] | We’ve been to strip clubs before. | 我们之前都去过脱衣舞厅 |
| [11:12] | Not like this one, dude. First time I got a lap dance there… | 不一样的哥们 我头一次去那的时候 |
| [11:15] | …the stripper grabs my hands and puts them on her tits. | 就有姑娘拿起我的手抓到她的乳头上 |
| [11:18] | Second dance, she turns around and | 第二回去 她转过身 |
| [11:20] | dry humps me the entire time. | 和我干蹭了一整晚 |
| [11:21] | She was gorgeous and she | 她非常漂亮 |
| [11:22] | wasn’t close to being the best one there. | 但在那里她可能都排不上号 |
| [11:24] | I used to think there was a | 我一直以为成人夜总会 |
| [11:25] | line between a gentlemen’s club and a brothel. | 和妓院是有明显区别的 |
| [11:27] | Now you’re telling me | 结果你现在告诉我 |
| [11:29] | – it’s all just gray. – Wait a second. | -他们之间没区别 -等一下 |
| [11:31] | You can full on grab their tits and they don’t even care? | 你说你抓她奶子她都没意见吗 |
| [11:34] | They encourage it. | 她们巴不得你抓呢 |
| [11:36] | Bet they had good childhoods. | 她们童年一定很精彩 |
| [11:37] | The very best part, $10 dances all night long. | 最爽的是整夜舞蹈只需十块 |
| [11:43] | I would rather fellate a hot curling iron than drive 250 miles… | 我宁可给热铁管口交也不会开250英里 |
| [11:49] | because tucker breastfed till he was 9. | 去满足塔克九岁断奶时未完成的梦 |
| [11:52] | Look, sounds great, but I can’t leave, all right? | 虽然听起来很棒 可是我去不了 |
| [11:55] | I got all kinds of meetings and stuff tomorrow. | 明天还有一大堆会等着我去开 |
| [11:57] | What kind of meetings? | 什么会啊 |
| [11:58] | You know, important stuff, | 一些重要的事情 |
| [12:00] | like the seating chart and whatnot. | 比如安排婚礼席位之类的 |
| [12:03] | A seating chart? | 安排座位吗 |
| [12:05] | I’m pretty sure kristy can cut that gordian knot. | 克瑞斯蒂肯定能搞定的 |
| [12:09] | Look, the wedding is next weekend, all right? | 下周末我就要结婚了好吗 |
| [12:11] | I’m not gonna leave Kristy | 我不会因为什么”禁摸”政策 |
| [12:12] | hanging because of some no-touch policy. | 而背着克瑞斯蒂乱搞的 |
| [12:15] | That’s your issue, Tucker, not mine. | 那是你的事 不是我该干的 |
| [12:16] | We’ll be back tomorrow afternoon. | 我们明天中午就回来 |
| [12:18] | If we stay in Richmond… | 如果待在里士满 |
| [12:20] | …we’re not gonna have the experience we need to make up… | 我们也不会像你一样 |
| [12:23] | …for that abomination of an | 穿着打扮好之后参加令人厌恶的 |
| [12:25] | engagement party you had with Kristy’s family. | 和克瑞斯蒂家一起的订婚派对 |
| [12:29] | So the tension builds. G, 61. | 中奖号码是 G 六十一 |
| [12:34] | Any bingos? | 谁猜对了吗 |
| [12:35] | G, 61. | G 六十一 |
| [12:37] | Genesis chapter six, verse one. | 创世纪第六章第一节 |
| [12:40] | – Yeah, that was pretty bad. – This is it. | -不堪回首 -这就对了 |
| [12:45] | This is our last fucking gasp together as single men. | 这是我们最后一次单身派对了 |
| [12:51] | I guess. | 也许是 |
| [12:53] | Dude, you’re my boys. | 你们是我的好兄弟 |
| [12:55] | I’m just gonna be honest with you. | 我对你们一片赤诚 |
| [12:57] | If you keep acting like a bitch… | 如果你老跟个娘们儿似的 |
| [12:58] | somebody’s gonna fuck that pussy in your face. | 迟早会有人搞死你的 |
| [13:01] | He’s right. Someone will do that. | 说的对 迟早的事 |
| [13:04] | What about Drew? | 看看德鲁 |
| [13:05] | Oh, don’t drag me into this. | 别拉我拉下水 |
| [13:07] | There is a next generation marathon this weekend. | 这周末还有马拉松新秀赛 |
| [13:09] | I’m more than happy just | 我想着戴安娜・特洛伊 |
| [13:11] | lusting after Deanna Troi. | 就已经知足了 |
| [13:12] | He hasn’t been out of his nerd hole for two weeks. | 他已经两周没有出屋了 |
| [13:15] | Drew needs this. | 德鲁急需这次派对 |
| [13:16] | You do need this. | 你真的需要这次派对 |
| [13:18] | I need this like I need Hepatitis C. | 你怎么不说我需要丙型肝炎 |
| [13:19] | You need this. | 你就是需要 |
| [13:22] | You need this. | 你就是需要 |
| [13:23] | He needs this. I need it. | 他需要这个 我也需要 |
| [13:25] | We all need it. | 我们都需要 |
| [13:27] | Because it’s our destiny as men. | 因为这是男人的使命 |
| [13:30] | There is no way I’m not gonna regret this. | 我肯定会后悔的 |
| [13:33] | But fuck it. Let’s go. | 但无所谓 我们走 |
| [13:35] | Done. Fuck it. | 妥了 靠 |
| [13:39] | – Whatever. – Let’s get the fuck out of here. | -随便吧 -先他妈离开这里 |
| [13:41] | Why not? | 当然了 |
| [13:45] | Bro, make sure to tell | 兄弟 如果你在莱丝莉 |
| [13:46] | leslie that I’m an asshole… | 面前说我是个混帐 |
| [13:48] | …and she should stay away, | 或者离我远点之类的 |
| [13:49] | it’ll only help me. | 那样只是帮我的忙 |
| [13:51] | – Hey, see you. – Hey. | -回头见 -好的 |
| [13:52] | That’s for you. | 这是给你的 |
| [13:55] | I already fingered her. | 我用手指爽过她 |
| [14:05] | Remember, you’re the reason | 记住 你是 |
| [14:07] | we’re going on this trip and you fucking earned it. | 这次旅行的目的而且你确实应该去 |
| [14:08] | So put your goddamn game face on. | 所以你一定要认真对待 |
| [14:14] | – Let’s do this. – All right. | -等我消息 -好吧 |
| [14:19] | He’s gonna fail worse than a friends spinoff. | 他会比被朋友出卖更惨的 |
| [14:27] | – Hey, babe. – Hey. | -宝贝 -回来啦 |
| [14:29] | What are you working on? | 你在忙什么 |
| [14:30] | The seating chart. | 在做席次表 |
| [14:32] | Oh, yeah? | 是吗 |
| [14:33] | Wow, looks like you’re almost done. | 看起来你快完成了 |
| [14:35] | Not really. | 还没有 |
| [14:37] | – Hey, guess who just called. – Who? | -猜猜谁来电话了 -谁 |
| [14:39] | My mom. | 我妈妈 |
| [14:40] | What? Another dinosaur fossil test her faith? | 怎么了 老顽固又要检查一下她的信仰吗 |
| [14:44] | She’s coming into town early to help out. Isn’t that nice of her? | 她就要过来帮忙了 真是太好了 |
| [14:47] | – How early? – Tonight. | -什么时候 -今晚 |
| [14:51] | Tonight? | 今晚 |
| [14:52] | You know she’s only coming | 她这么早来只是 |
| [14:54] | in early so she can take control of everything. | 为了掌控所有事情 |
| [14:56] | No, she’s not. Quit being so dramatic. | 她不会的 你太夸张了 |
| [15:00] | If she has it her way, | 如果用她的方法 |
| [15:01] | the reception’s gonna be a potluck in a barn. | 肯定会把宴会搞的一团糟的 |
| [15:03] | She’s pious and conservative, Dan, not Pennsylvania Dutch. | 她又虔诚又保守 她不是德裔宾州人 |
| [15:06] | Probably gonna churn our own butter for the dinner rolls. | 也许她会自制黄油来做面包圈 |
| [15:10] | My parents are paying for this entire wedding. | 整个婚礼都是我父母出的钱 |
| [15:12] | She’s entitled to some input. | 她把这称为投资 |
| [15:13] | Come on, babe. | 别这样 宝贝 |
| [15:15] | I just don’t want her to suck all of the fun out of the wedding. | 我只是不想让她把婚礼变得毫无乐趣 |
| [15:18] | It’s my day too. | 这也是我的婚礼 |
| [15:19] | All right, Groomzilla. | 好吧 怪物新郎 |
| [15:21] | Oh, whoa. | 天哪 |
| [15:22] | Don’t groomzilla me. Those | 不要叫我怪物新郎 |
| [15:23] | squirrel hunters wouldn’t know a good time if it… | 那些松鼠猎人看见松鼠踏进草坪时 |
| [15:26] | …landed on the front lawn of their megachurch. | 可不知道什么时候应该出手 |
| [15:31] | What’s taking him so long? | 他怎么去了那么久 |
| [15:33] | He’s talking to a woman. Anything is possible. | 他在跟女人说话 什么都可能发生 |
| [15:38] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么 |
| [15:39] | Packing. | 打包 |
| [15:41] | For what? | 为什么 |
| [15:42] | I’m going to Salem with Tucker and Drew for my bachelor party. | 我要和塔克和德鲁去塞伦参加单身派对 |
| [15:45] | – I thought you were staying. – Change of plans. | -我以为你要留下来 -计划变了 |
| [15:48] | Tucker knows about a great strip club down there. | 塔克知道那里有个很好的脱衣舞厅 |
| [15:50] | Oh, good for Tucker. I hope he has a great time. | 塔克真是好人 希望他玩的愉快 |
| [15:53] | Babe, come on. You know I can’t let him go off by himself. | 宝贝 我不能让他一个人去的 |
| [15:57] | – Somebody needs go have his back. – Oh, and who’s got your back? | -得有人看着他 -那谁来看着你 |
| [16:00] | Drew? | 德鲁吗 |
| [16:03] | Tucker’s got my back. | 塔克会看住我的 |
| [16:04] | Tucker? Tucker says he’s got your back. | 塔克 塔克说他能看住你吗 |
| [16:07] | Except you’re the one who always ends up bailing him out. | 每次都是你去把他保释出来的 |
| [16:10] | I wish you took care of me as well as you take care of Tucker. | 真希望你能像照顾塔克那样照顾我 |
| [16:13] | Well, that is a load of crap. | 真是胡说八道 |
| [16:15] | I always look out for you. You’re my number-one priority. | 我一直很关心你 一切都以你为重 |
| [16:19] | Really? Really? When have I taken precedence? | 真的 真的吗 你什么时候以我为重了 |
| [16:23] | When have you chosen me over Tucker? | 你什么时候把我看的比塔克还重了 |
| [16:25] | Give me an example. Just one. | 给我举一个例子就行 |
| [16:28] | I’m marrying you, aren’t I? | 我要娶你 不是吗 |
| [16:31] | Should I go help? | 我应该去帮忙吗 |
| [16:32] | There is a zero-percent chance… | 你去帮忙能够 |
| [16:35] | …that injecting you into | 让情况好转的概率 |
| [16:36] | the situation is gonna make it any better. | 是百分之零 |
| [16:40] | I’m going in. | 我要进去了 |
| [16:47] | Bring me a red bull. | 给我带瓶红牛 |
| [16:49] | Yeah, why can’t we just compromise? | 是的 你就不能妥协一下吗 |
| [16:51] | Compromise? | 妥协 |
| [16:52] | You kidding? That’s all I’ve been doing. | 你开什么玩笑 我一直在妥协 |
| [16:54] | Your father didn’t want a bachelor | 你爸爸不希望举办 |
| [16:55] | party with strippers and booze, I said fine. | 看脱衣舞狂饮的派对 我同意了 |
| [16:58] | We’ll have an engagement party at church. | 我们会在教堂办一个订婚宴会 |
| [17:00] | I wanted a bouncy castle at the reception. | 我想在充气城堡开迎宾宴会 |
| [17:02] | Bouncy castles are childish and dangerous. Grow up. | 他说 充气城堡又幼稚又危险 你能不能成熟点 |
| [17:05] | You know, and I said fine, | 我说好吧 |
| [17:06] | because I didn’t wanna argue with your mom. | 因为我不想跟你妈吵架 |
| [17:09] | It’s just a stupid bouncy castle. | 不过是个充气城堡 |
| [17:11] | The only thing I’ve been able to hold onto is the open bar… | 我现在唯一的想法只是设立一个酒水吧台 |
| [17:14] | …and now she’s gonna fly in here and take that too. | 她却要飞来把我最后的希望都带走 |
| [17:16] | You’re not gonna do a thing to stop her. | 你却一点都不想阻止她 |
| [17:19] | You know, if all this is so important to you, | 如果这些对你都这么重要 |
| [17:21] | then quit complaining and take a stand. | 那就别抱怨了 你来决定 |
| [17:24] | Oh, you want me to take a stand? Fine. | 你想让我做决定 好啊 |
| [17:26] | I’m going to Salem and I don’t care what you… | 我要去塞伦 我不在乎你 |
| [17:29] | …or the wicked witch of west Texas thinks about it. | 和那个西德州老巫婆的想法 |
| [17:31] | What’s up, guys? You ready? | 怎么样了 准备好了吗 |
| [17:33] | Hey, what’s this I hear you’re taking Dan out of town? | 听说你要带着丹出城玩 |
| [17:36] | Richmond passed this stupid no-touch policy. | 都是因为里士满的禁摸政策 |
| [17:38] | Since the ladies can’t seem to keep their hands off me… | 这里的女人却都想摸我 |
| [17:41] | …it’d be irresponsible to go to clubs here. | 所以去本地的酒吧很不负责 |
| [17:43] | – How thoughtful of you. – You don’t mind, do you? | -你想的真周到 -你不介意吧 |
| [17:50] | I’m not stepping on any toes, am I? | 我没做错什么事吧 |
| [17:51] | We have all the final wedding appointments tomorrow. | 我们明天要商量婚礼的事情 |
| [17:54] | Oh, no. | 不是吧 |
| [17:55] | Dan. | 丹 |
| [17:57] | You didn’t say anything. Why didn’t you tell me, man? | 你什么都没说 你怎么不早点告诉我 |
| [17:59] | That’s not cool. It’s your wedding, man. | 这样可不好 这可是你的婚礼 |
| [18:03] | Listen, we’ll just go out in town. | 听着 我们就在城里玩 |
| [18:05] | We can do Salem after your honeymoon. | 等你们蜜月完了我们再去塞伦 |
| [18:08] | Sound good, huh? Kristy, that way you can come too. | 怎么样 克瑞斯蒂 你同意吗 |
| [18:12] | – All right, that’s cool. – All right. | -好吧 我同意 -很好 |
| [18:14] | He won’t need this anymore. | 他不需要这个了 |
| [18:16] | I’ll have him back before you even wake up. | 我会在你醒来之前把他送回来的 |
| [18:19] | Kristy, you look hot as always. | 克瑞斯蒂 你看起来和以前一样性感 |
| [18:22] | You are so full of shit. | 真会胡说八道 |
| [18:30] | Salem, here we come, man. | 我们要去塞伦了 |
| [18:32] | What? | 什么 |
| [18:33] | Oh, come on. | 来吧 |
| [18:35] | Do you think it’s possible to keep me from something I want? | 你不会真以为我们不去了吧 |
| [18:38] | The more important question is… | 更重要的是 |
| [18:40] | …are you ready to get shitfaced and grab some titties? | 你准备好疯玩一把了吗 |
| [18:43] | That’s not a red bull. | 这不是红牛 |
| [19:13] | Here’s what I don’t get. Why did you have to lie to her? | 我不明白 你为什么要骗她 |
| [19:17] | It’s not like I wasn’t gonna go anyway. | 我从来不会这样的 |
| [19:18] | Oh, please. When I walked in, | 拜托 我进去的时候 |
| [19:20] | you had so much surrender in your eyes… | 看得出来你已经屈服了 |
| [19:22] | …I thought your apartment was Vichy France. | 你家就像维希法国一样 |
| [19:24] | We need to stop for food. | 我们得停下来吃点东西 |
| [19:26] | My blood sugar is getting low. | 我的血糖开始降低了 |
| [19:28] | I just hate lying to Kristy, man. | 我只是不喜欢对克瑞斯蒂说谎 |
| [19:30] | You didn’t lie to her, I did. | 你没骗她 我骗的 |
| [19:32] | That is bullshit. | 胡说 |
| [19:34] | But somehow I’m going with it. | 不管怎么样 这事和我有关 |
| [19:36] | If I don’t get a pancakewich, I’m calling the authorities… | 如果我还吃不到薄饼三明治 我就要叫警察 |
| [19:39] | …and have you arrested for kidnapping and conspiracy. | 以绑架罪逮捕你们了 |
| [19:42] | I don’t know how you eat pancakewiches. | 真不知道你为什么喜欢薄饼三明治 |
| [19:44] | They look disgusting. | 真是恶心死了 |
| [19:46] | I can only assume from your cavalier attitude… | 从你这种满不在乎的态度来看 |
| [19:49] | …that you have yet to partake | 我猜你从来没有吃过 |
| [19:51] | in the wonderment that is the pancakewich. | 美味的薄饼三明治 |
| [19:54] | Let me enlighten you. | 我告诉你 |
| [19:56] | What happens is the one true god grows pancakewiches on trees… | 真神用魔咒在天堂里 |
| [20:01] | …in the elysian fields using a mystical incantation. | 种下了薄饼三明治之树 |
| [20:05] | He then proceeds to magic them down to your local eatery… | 然后用魔法将它们送给人间那些 |
| [20:09] | …where whatever societal | 不顾大众反对的 |
| [20:10] | reject griddleworld has rescued off the dole… | 本地餐馆 |
| [20:14] | …gently wraps them in | 只需要把它们包进 |
| [20:15] | cellophane and passes them along to you… | 玻璃纸里 就可以出售给 |
| [20:17] | …the fortunate consumer. | 我们这些幸运的顾客了 |
| [20:19] | You proceed to ingest this finery… | 你吃下去一口 就会发现 |
| [20:22] | …in the vain hope that your overmatched taste buds… | 它的美味会战胜你的理智 |
| [20:24] | …can somehow comprehend | 让你有一种 |
| [20:26] | the delectable intricacies that face them. | 及其快乐的感觉 |
| [20:30] | Is that egg? Why, yes. Yes, it is. | 那是鸡蛋吗 什么 是的 当然是鸡蛋 |
| [20:33] | And bacon too. | 还有熏肉 |
| [20:35] | But wait, did they–? | 等等 他们有 |
| [20:37] | They didn’t. Yes, they did, they did indeed. | 是的 当然 |
| [20:40] | They added cheese. | 他们加了乳酪 |
| [20:42] | And then, then, my friend… | 然后 我的朋友 |
| [20:45] | …they wrapped it in a sumptuous pancake bun. | 他们把他卷成了一个华丽的薄饼卷 |
| [20:50] | As your taste buds try to | 你的味蕾试图 |
| [20:52] | process that amazing piece of information… | 处理这些味道 |
| [20:56] | …it hits them. | 但却被它们打败了 |
| [20:59] | The syrup nugget. | 糖浆块 |
| [21:01] | The motherfucking syrup nugget. | 就他妈的是糖浆块 |
| [21:04] | It announces itself with a burst of confectionery grandiosity… | 它的味道 |
| [21:08] | …the likes of which your palate has never seen. | 绝对是你们从未尝过的 |
| [21:14] | So you like them? | 所以你很喜欢吃 |
| [21:19] | Allow me to rephrase. | 请允许我重申一下 |
| [21:21] | If you ever speak ill of the pancakewich again… | 如果你再说一句薄饼三明治的坏话 |
| [21:23] | …I will personally come to your home and force-feed you one… | 我就跑到你的家里 一边用包装纸当安全套 |
| [21:27] | …while I fuck you in the ass with the wrapper as a condom… | 搞你 一边强迫你吃一个 |
| [21:31] | …and then donkey punch | 然后狠狠地打你一顿 |
| [21:32] | you when the infused syrup nugget explodes. | 直到你肚子里的糖块爆炸 |
| [21:37] | We got a motherfucking griddleworld coming up at the next exit. | 下个出口有个煎饼店 |
| [21:40] | Thank god. | 感谢老天 |
| [21:50] | 塞伦 174英里 | |
| [22:10] | Oh, come on. Who farted? | 谁放屁了 |
| [22:12] | – I don’t smell anything. – Oh, my god. | -我什么也没闻到 -天哪 |
| [22:14] | Oh, what is wrong with you? | 你怎么回事 |
| [22:17] | It smells like you got buttfucked by a garbage truck. | 闻起来就像你的屁股被垃圾车暴了一样 |
| [22:20] | Hey, griddleworld was your idea, man. | 是你要去煎饼店吃饭的 |
| [22:22] | Do not disparage the pancakewich. | 不准说煎饼三明治的坏话 |
| [22:25] | Could you just unlock the fucking window, Tucker? | 能把窗户打开吗 塔克 |
| [22:28] | – You get a bit back there? – Fuck yourself. | -后面有味吗 -操你妈 |
| [22:30] | Where are my law books? | 我的法律书呢 |
| [22:32] | This must count as a felony battery. | 这应该算是重罪 |
| [22:34] | – Dude. – All right, fuck. | -哥们 -好吧 靠 |
| [22:37] | You guys have such weak constitutions. | 你们还真是娇生惯养 |
| [22:39] | I bet those girls wouldn’t complain as much as you two. | 我打赌那些女孩绝对不会像你们这样抱怨 |
| [22:42] | – I can taste that. – They wouldn’t. They’re hookers. | -我能闻到 -她们不会是因为她们是妓女 |
| [22:44] | They subject themselves to anything… | 为了钱 |
| [22:45] | …for the right price. | 她们什么都不在乎 |
| [22:47] | Not every woman at street is a whore. | 不是每个街上的女人都是妓女 |
| [22:48] | Tucker, where are we going? | 塔克 我们这是要去哪 |
| [22:50] | Where’s the strip club? | 脱衣舞俱乐部呢 |
| [22:51] | It’s not even 7:00 yet. The club doesn’t open till 10. | 现在七点都没到 俱乐部十点才开门 |
| [22:54] | – Let’s get some drinks first. Pre-game. – Oh, wonderful. | -我们去喝点酒吧 算是前戏 -太好了 |
| [22:57] | Now I can hate all these people from up close… | 现在我可以讨厌他们每个人 |
| [23:00] | …instead of baselessly | 而不用 |
| [23:01] | judging them from this metal fart coffin. | 靠他们的屁来判断了 |
| [23:04] | Last time I was here there | 上次我来的时候 |
| [23:05] | was more pussy than you could shake a stick at. | 这里的小妞数不胜数 |
| [23:07] | Unbelievable hot chicks, wall to wall. | 超性感的小妞 到处都是 |
| [23:14] | All right, dude. | 好吧 哥们 |
| [23:15] | Can’t you see… | 你看到了吗 |
| [23:18] | Oh, yeah, this place is crawling with trim. Shame I’m taken. | 这地方真整洁 太令人害羞了 |
| [23:22] | Let’s see some IDs, guys. | 给我看看你们的身份证 |
| [23:24] | Looks like Lane Bryant and | 就像雷恩・布莱恩特和 |
| [23:26] | Jenny Craig had a knife fight in here. | 珍妮・克莱格在这打了一场似的 |
| [23:28] | Ten dollar cover tonight. | 十美元一晚 |
| [23:30] | You know what a soft-off is? | 你知道什么叫软下去吗 |
| [23:33] | No, what is it? | 不知道 那是什么 |
| [23:35] | It’s the opposite of a hard-on. | 是勃起的反义词 |
| [23:37] | And that’s what I have. | 这就是我的感觉 |
| [23:39] | I will pay you $10… | 要是你能把这些恐怖的记忆 |
| [23:41] | …only if you can erase this visual atrocity from my memory. | 从我脑子里抹去 我就付给你十美元 |
| [23:44] | Go down to whiskey bar. That’s where everybody’s at tonight. | 那就去威士忌吧 今晚大家都在那里 |
| [23:47] | And by everybody, you mean all the dudes? | 大家 你是指所有男人吗 |
| [23:50] | I wish, man, I wish. No, I gotta stay here. | 我希望是 但不是 我要呆在这 |
| [23:53] | – Let’s give it a shot. – Come on. | -我们去试试 -来吧 |
| [23:54] | It can’t be worse than this. | 肯定不会比这更糟糕的 |
| [24:03] | All right, now this is what I call a target-rich environment. | 好了 这就是我说的数不胜数了 |
| [24:06] | I agree. | 我同意 |
| [24:07] | I wanna shoot every one of these bitches. | 我想干死这里的每一个婊子 |
| [24:10] | – Not her. – Nice. | -不是她 -真漂亮 |
| [24:12] | – Her too. – All right, fellas. | -她也是 -好了 兄弟们 |
| [24:13] | A little over two hours until avarice opens up. | 还有2个小时脱衣舞厅就要开门了 |
| [24:16] | Let’s see if we can’t get girls to go with us. | 看看能不能找几个女孩跟我们一起去 |
| [24:18] | Wait, wait, wait. | 等等 等等 |
| [24:20] | You wanna pick up sluts to bring them to go see whores? | 你想找妓女陪我们去看妓女 |
| [24:25] | If things go well. | 如果顺利的话 |
| [24:27] | Oh, look, a menagerie of sluts. Who would have guessed? | 看啊 一堆妓女 谁知道会这样呢 |
| [24:31] | What are those drinks? | 那是些什么饮料 |
| [24:32] | Not the ones with the penises in it. The other ones. | 不是那个有吸管的 另外那些 |
| [24:34] | It’s called a flaming Dr. Pepper. | 这叫燃情辣椒 |
| [24:36] | Looks amazing. Throw three more on there. | 看起来不错 给我们来三杯 |
| [24:38] | We’re not paying for those. | 我们可不会替你们付钱 |
| [24:40] | Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. It’s okay, we got this round. | 别担心 甜心 我们自己付钱 |
| [24:43] | My name isn’t sweetheart, it’s Mary. | 我不叫甜心 我叫玛丽 |
| [24:46] | Okay, good to know. Thank you. | 好 我知道了 谢谢 |
| [24:49] | Drew, not all girls are sluts. | 德鲁 不是所有的女孩都是妓女 |
| [24:51] | – Just most of them. – I hope this sets off the sprinklers. | -只是大多数 -希望不要洒出来 |
| [24:54] | – Oh, nice. – Shit. | -真好看 -靠 |
| [25:01] | I’ve seen better. | 我见过更棒的 |
| [25:08] | That tastes like ass. | 真不怎么好喝 |
| [25:09] | Holy shit. It tastes like a Dr. Pepper. | 天哪 喝起来像辣椒 |
| [25:12] | Hence the name. | 就像它的名字一样 |
| [25:13] | Thank you. Again. Eight more of them. | 谢谢 再来八杯 |
| [25:15] | That will be another $120. | 那得再付120美元 |
| [25:17] | Shit. Just get us eight vodka shots. | 靠 那就再来八杯伏特加 |
| [25:18] | You guys aren’t worth that much. | 你们不值那么多 |
| [25:20] | Oh, our company is priceless. | 我们是无价的 |
| [25:22] | If it lacks a price, it is probably worthless. | 如果没有定价 就是毫无价值的 |
| [25:27] | – Any particular kind of vodka? – Well, please. | -要什么伏特加 -最烈的 |
| [25:29] | Thank you for asking. Down there. | 谢谢你能先问我 这边 |
| [25:36] | If this is a real bachelorette party, who’s the designated slut? | 如果这真的是个单身派对 那谁是妓女 |
| [25:39] | Don’t call us sluts. You didn’t even know us. | 我们不是妓女 你都不认识我们 |
| [25:41] | No one here is a slut. | 我们没人是妓女 |
| [25:43] | Oh, come on, come on. | 别这样 |
| [25:44] | The slut at a bachelor party | 单身派对上的妓女 |
| [25:45] | is kind of like the sucker at a poker table. | 就跟牌桌上的笨蛋一样 |
| [25:47] | If you can’t pick them out, it’s probably you. | 如果你选不出来 那可能就是你自己 |
| [25:51] | Here we are ladies, one for each of you. Palm greaser for you. | 女士们 一人一杯 这是你的 |
| [25:54] | – Panty dropper for you. – Not cool, you know. | -这是你的 -一点也不好玩 |
| [25:56] | Making fun of girls to impress your friends is so immature. | 拿女孩开玩笑来搭讪的方法很幼稚 |
| [26:00] | You’re such a jerk. | 你真是个笨蛋 |
| [26:01] | Your friends are laughing more than mine. | 你朋友的笑声比我朋友还多 |
| [26:03] | – I’m not laughing at all. – Why are you guys laughing? | -我没笑 -你们笑什么 |
| [26:06] | Don’t laugh. It’s not funny. | 别笑了 一点也不好玩 |
| [26:09] | I think a toast is in order for my buddy Dan, | 敬我的兄弟 丹 |
| [26:11] | who’s also getting married. | 他快要结婚了 |
| [26:13] | And the bachelorette and all her beautiful friends… | 敬这个未婚女士 还有她漂亮的朋友们 |
| [26:17] | …even the bitchy prude. | 还有这个暴躁的处女 |
| [26:20] | Here is to the people we’ve met. | 敬所有认识的人 |
| [26:24] | And to the people we’ve fucked. | 还有我们干过的人 |
| [26:26] | And to those of us who have had no such luck. | 还有那些不幸的人 |
| [26:29] | Here’s to beer in the glass and vodka in the cup. | 敬那些手里拿着啤酒和伏特加的人 |
| [26:34] | Here’s to poking her in the ass so she won’t get knocked up. | 也敬她 希望她不要一夜大肚 |
| [26:38] | Here’s to all of you, and here’s to me… | 敬你们所有人 还有我自己 |
| [26:42] | …together as friends we will always be. | 我们永远是朋友 |
| [26:45] | But if we should ever disagree… | 要是你们不同意 |
| [26:46] | …then fuck all of you, here’s to me. | 我就把你们都干了 |
| [26:50] | – Cheers. – All right. | -干杯 -好了 |
| [26:54] | All right, but for real, which one’s the naughty one? | 好了 说真的 谁比较调皮 |
| [26:56] | See now, the world goes round in circles | 世界循环往复 |
| [26:59] | It never would stop | 永无止息 |
| [27:07] | All right. What’s your porn name? | 好了 你的别名是 |
| [27:10] | Scott Peterson. | 斯科特・皮特森 |
| [27:11] | No, no, not your real name. | 不 不是你的真名 |
| [27:14] | Your porn name is your pet’s name and the street you grew up on. | 你宠物的名字 或者你家街道的名字 |
| [27:17] | I wasn’t allowed to have pets. | 家里人不许我养宠物 |
| [27:19] | Okay, we’ll do another way, then. What’s your middle name? | 好吧 换个问法 你中间的名字是什么 |
| [27:23] | I don’t have one, unless I | 我没有 除非小时候 |
| [27:24] | missed it between “Shut” and “Up” as a kid. | 他们叫我闭嘴时还加了什么词 |
| [27:27] | Oh, come on. Play along, it’s fun. | 别这样 合作点 这很好玩的 |
| [27:30] | If you touch me again. | 你要是再碰我一下 |
| [27:32] | I will gut you and grind you into pig slop. | 我就把你杀了 丢到猪圈里去 |
| [27:38] | What–? Why? | 怎么了 为什么 |
| [27:40] | You’re the only guy I know that actually cock blocks himself. | 很少有人像你这样拒人于千里之外 |
| [27:43] | Come on, man. This night is about you and Dan. | 别这样 今晚是属于你和丹的 |
| [27:48] | Remember what we talked about in your apartment? | 记得我们说过的吗 |
| [27:49] | Instead of being a fucking killjoy… | 当你扫兴的时候 |
| [27:51] | …you stop and ask yourself, “What would Tucker do?? | 你应该问问自己 塔克会怎么做 |
| [27:54] | and then you go do that. | 然后照着那样做 |
| [27:55] | Well, unfortunately, we can’t | 不幸的是 |
| [27:57] | both go after the girl with the lowest self-esteem. | 我们不能放弃自尊心去追女孩 |
| [28:00] | – Now, can we? – We can try. | -现在可以吗 -可以试试 |
| [28:04] | Speak of the devil. | 说曹操 曹操到 |
| [28:06] | What’s up? You finally | 怎么 你终于准备好 |
| [28:07] | ready to hook up or we need more shots first? | 让我搞了吗 还是要再喝几杯 |
| [28:10] | She’s the bride. | 她是准新娘 |
| [28:11] | You talk a big game, Mr. Man. | 你要玩刺激的 情圣 |
| [28:15] | But you don’t look like much of a drinker to me. | 不过在我看来 你不像个能喝酒的 |
| [28:18] | Oh, really? Are you talking to me? | 是吗 你在和我说话吗 |
| [28:20] | You couldn’t tie my drinking shoes. | 在喝酒上你都不配给我系鞋带 |
| [28:24] | Let’s do shots, then. | 那我们就试下 |
| [28:25] | Oh! Isn’t she precious? | 她太可爱了 |
| [28:28] | We’ll do teams. It’ll be fun. | 我们玩团战 肯定很有趣 |
| [28:30] | – “It will be fun.” – Okay, fine. | -肯定很有趣 -好 没问题 |
| [28:32] | – “We will do teams.” – Let’s do it. | -玩团战 -来吧 |
| [28:34] | Bachelor and hottest guy, me, duh… | 准新郎 最帅的我 傻瓜 |
| [28:36] | …versus bachelorette and your hottest friends. | 对 准新娘和你的美女朋友们 |
| [28:39] | – I think your friend’s hotter. – Yeah? | -我觉得你的朋友更帅 -是吗 |
| [28:41] | Talk to him for five minutes and tell me what you think. | 你先和他聊聊再告诉我你的想法 |
| [28:43] | Let’s get down to business. | 好了 开战 |
| [28:45] | Line them up. And no girly shit either. | 酒杯摆好 不能耍赖 |
| [28:47] | If it has sugar in it, it’s not a real shot. | 耍赖就没意思了 |
| [28:58] | So what’s up with Mary, queen of twats over there? | 那边那个讨厌的玛丽怎么回事 |
| [29:02] | You know how it is. | 你知道的 |
| [29:04] | It’d suck to be such an angry bitch. | 当个这么讨人厌的人真无趣 |
| [29:07] | She can be lots of fun when she wants to be. | 她心情好的时候还是不错的 |
| [29:09] | When is that? When she’s | 那是什么时候 |
| [29:10] | luring small children into her gingerbread house? | 骗小孩的时候吗 |
| [29:12] | No. She isn’t that bad. | 不 她没那么坏 |
| [29:14] | Women are the worst | 女人在评价朋友方面是最苛刻的 |
| [29:16] | at judging their friends. | 你们真的是她朋友吗 |
| [29:17] | – She’s really sweet. – Bums wouldn’t fuck her. | -她真挺好的 -流浪汗都不会上她 |
| [29:19] | I don’t know about bums. | 我不了解流浪汗 |
| [29:21] | Maybe titty fuck her. | 可能女人愿意上她 |
| [29:34] | For the record, I just wanted to disagree with my friend Tucker– | 申明一下 我不赞同我的朋友塔克 |
| [29:37] | Oh, baby. | 宝贝 |
| [29:39] | Grillionaire. | 吉利内尔 |
| [29:41] | I got ice, whips, hoes, money. Got ice, whips, hoes, money | 我有钻石 皮鞭 女人 金钱 |
| [29:46] | You like this guy? | 你喜欢这家伙 |
| [29:48] | I love him. He is hot. | 我爱死他了 他真性感 |
| [29:52] | How they do, baby Grillionaire in the house | 感觉如何 宝贝 吉利内尔上场 |
| [29:55] | How they do, baby Grillionaire in the house | 感觉如何 宝贝 吉利内尔上场 |
| [29:59] | Yeah, buddy | 兄弟 |
| [30:00] | Get away from me, or I’m | 离我远点 不然我 |
| [30:02] | gonna carve another fuck hole in your torso. | 在你身上再凿个洞出来 |
| [30:21] | Sorry, man. Want me to ask them to turn it off? | 抱歉 老兄 要叫他们关掉吗 |
| [30:24] | Yes. | 要 |
| [30:26] | You gotta admit, though, man, it is kind of catchy. | 但你得承认 老兄 他很有吸引力 |
| [30:29] | It’s a good fucking hook. | 这招泡妞真棒 |
| [30:30] | Ice, ice, whips, whips, hoes, hoes, money | 钻石 钻石 皮鞭 皮鞭 女人 女人 金钱 |
| [30:33] | Ice, ice, whips, whips, hoes, hoes, money | 钻石 钻石 皮鞭 皮鞭 女人 女人 金钱 |
| [30:36] | Got it? Ice, ice, whips– | 明白吗 钻石 钻石 皮鞭 |
| [30:37] | All right, all right, all right. We’ll stop. Okay, just– | 好了 不玩了 行了 |
| [30:41] | Where the hoes at? | 女人们在哪儿 |
| [30:43] | This is for all you bitches, hoes, and pricks. | 敬你们这些贱人 妓女还有流氓 |
| [30:47] | We wouldn’t talk to any | 如果没老二 |
| [30:49] | of you if we didn’t have dicks. Tucker Max. | 我们也不会和你们说话 塔克・麦克斯 |
| [30:52] | Who’s Tucker Max? | 塔克・麦克斯是谁 |
| [30:53] | A rapist. | 一个强奸犯 |
| [30:55] | I can’t. I’m done. | 我不行了 喝不下了 |
| [30:56] | What? | 什么 |
| [30:58] | Six shots. | 才六杯 |
| [30:59] | That’s it? Six shots? | 就结束了吗 六杯而已 |
| [31:01] | Oh, you may be able to vote and drive, | 你们或许还能公投或驾车 |
| [31:03] | but you will never be equal. | 但永远无法和我们一样 |
| [31:04] | It’s embarrassing. | 真难堪 |
| [31:05] | Why are you talking to him? He is such a pig. | 你们大伙为何和他说话 这么个混蛋 |
| [31:07] | – He’s just messing around. – Come on, he’s cute. | -他只是瞎闹 -别这样 他很可爱的 |
| [31:10] | Cute, like full-blown AIDS. | 可爱得就像 晚期爱滋病 |
| [31:13] | No, he’s not. Everything he says is disgusting and misogynist. | 不 他说的每句话都恶心 侮辱妇女 |
| [31:17] | Uh…. no, it isn’t. | 不 我没有 |
| [31:20] | If I said women belong chained to a stove… | 如果我说女人就该被拴在炉子旁 |
| [31:23] | …with just enough slack to reach the bedroom… | 锁链长到能到卧室就行 |
| [31:25] | …because those are the only tow places | 因为这就是你们这些”偷肋骨”的女性 |
| [31:26] | that your rib-stealing gender’s worth a damn… | 应该待的地方 |
| [31:29] | – That would be misogynist. – Would be true. | -这才是歧视女性 -才真是歧视 |
| [31:31] | Excuse me? | 你想说什么 |
| [31:34] | What I said was sexist and a fucking joke. | 我说的一个是笑话一个是真正的性别歧视 |
| [31:37] | Not that your pageant-girl ass would know the difference. | 你这种娇惯的淑女是不会知道区别的 |
| [31:40] | That’s much. | 过头了 |
| [31:42] | – What? – Fine. You know what? | -什么 -好吧 你知道吗 |
| [31:43] | You’re sexist and misogynist. | 你这个歧视女性的家伙 |
| [31:45] | Good for you. | 这样对你最好 |
| [31:47] | Tucker, you misogynist neanderthal. | 塔克 你这个歧视女性的原始人 |
| [31:50] | Why dost thou hate women so? | 你为何如此仇恨女人 |
| [31:54] | That’s the thing. I don’t hate women. I love women. | 没有 我不恨女人 我爱女人 |
| [31:57] | Why else would I put up with all their shit? | 不然我为何要容忍她们那些龌龊缺点 |
| [32:00] | Now you’re being kind of mean. | 现在你有点过分了 |
| [32:01] | Yeah, you know what? | 恩 知道吗 |
| [32:03] | You’re an ass. | 你是个蠢蛋 |
| [32:06] | I just don’t like her as a person… | 我只是做人方法和她不同 |
| [32:09] | …because she’s a negative fucking bitch. | 因为她是个消极无趣的贱人 |
| [32:11] | That has nothing to do with whether or not she has tits. | 而且这和她是否是女人无关 |
| [32:14] | Tucker. | 塔克 |
| [32:17] | That’s not good game. | 这样说可不好 |
| [32:20] | – You’re really mean. – Yeah. | -你真的很过分 -没错 |
| [32:22] | Yeah. You know what? Come on, let’s go. Let’s go. | 是的 来 我们走 |
| [32:26] | It was going so good. | 本来那么开心的 |
| [32:28] | We actually made friends. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. | 我们真的在交朋友 等等 等一下 |
| [32:31] | Asshole. | 混蛋 |
| [32:33] | Wait, wait, wait. Guys, come on, sorry. | 等等 各位 对不起 |
| [32:35] | Listen, I just want to apologize. | 听着 我只是想道歉 |
| [32:37] | You’ll have to forgive my friend, all right? | 你们一定要原谅我朋友 好吗 |
| [32:40] | – He’s got mommy issues. – What do you mean? | -他对妈妈有阴影 -你指什么 |
| [32:43] | Mommy was the life of the party. | 妈咪就是派对的人生 |
| [32:45] | Mommy, where do babies come from? | 妈咪 宝宝是从哪儿来的 |
| [32:48] | Go ask your deadbeat father and his fancy new wife. | 去问你那个饭桶爸爸和他时髦的新夫人去 |
| [32:52] | He really is a good guy, honest. | 说实话 他真是个棒小伙 |
| [32:53] | He’s just sometimes a little quick on the trigger. | 只是有时有点唐突 |
| [32:57] | Why don’t you just come to the strip club? | 来吧 和我们一起去脱衣舞厅吧 |
| [32:59] | – Drinks will be on the asshole. – Yeah, come on. | -喝的全由这混蛋包了 -来 一起吧 |
| [33:01] | That sounds like a plan. | 听着像个阴谋 |
| [33:04] | What strip club you guys going to? | 你们想去哪家 |
| [33:06] | – It’s called Avarice. – I’ve never heard of it. | -贪婪 -我从没听过 |
| [33:08] | That’s because they don’t let prudish bitches in. | 那是因为他们不让装正经的贱人进去 |
| [33:11] | Tucker. | 塔克 |
| [33:12] | She’s not a bitch. | 她不是贱人 |
| [33:15] | She’s a snatch napkin. | 她是个无脑小妞 |
| [33:18] | It was nice to meet you. | 很高兴见到你们 |
| [33:21] | Oh, my god. | 上帝 |
| [33:23] | Call information. Find out where this club is. | 打信息台 查出那家夜总会在哪儿 |
| [33:25] | What? I thought you knew where it was. | 什么 我以为你知道在哪 |
| [33:27] | No, dude. I was fucking half drunk. | 不知道 老兄 我已经醉了 |
| [33:29] | – I don’t know precisely where it is. – You said you knew. | -我不知道具体在哪儿 -你说你知道 |
| [33:32] | – I said that? – Yeah. | -我说过吗 -说过 |
| [33:33] | I can’t be held accountable | 我不可能对我说的每一件事 |
| [33:35] | for the things that come out of my mouth. Just make the call. | 都负责吧 快打电话吧 |
| [33:40] | I’d just like to remind everyone | 我只想以一个酒醉的无业游民 |
| [33:42] | that we’re going down a strange, dark alley… | 的身份给大家提个建议 |
| [33:44] | …on the advice of a drunken hobo. | 我们正走在陌生漆黑的巷子里 |
| [33:48] | So? | 然后呢 |
| [33:50] | Yeah, I don’t really see a problem, either. | 没错 我也没看出有什么问题 |
| [33:52] | All right. This has gotta be it. | 好了 肯定是这 |
| [33:54] | This spot. It must be. | 是这里 绝对是这了 |
| [33:58] | What’s up, man? How’s it going? You having a good night? | 你好吗 老兄 今晚愉快吗 |
| [34:02] | Cool. | 酷 |
| [34:04] | All right | 来吧 |
| [34:13] | Break me down you got a lovely face | 让我疯狂吧 你有可爱的面孔 |
| [34:17] | We’re going to your place | 我们会去你的住所 |
| [34:19] | But now you got to freak me out | 但现在你得先让我惊喜 |
| [34:23] | Scream so loud get fucking laid | 放声尖叫 狂野做爱 |
| [34:26] | You want me to stay | 你想留住我 |
| [34:29] | But I got to make my way | 但我得逃走 |
| [34:33] | Hey you’re a crazy bitch | 你是狂野的贱人 |
| [34:35] | But you fuck so good I’m on top of it | 但你如此香艳 |
| [34:37] | When I dream I’m doing you all night | 我梦到整晚与你 |
| [34:40] | Scratches all down my back | 一起缠绵 |
| [34:41] | Oh, that’s a hundred. | 那是张百元大钞 |
| [34:44] | Oh, man. | 老兄 |
| [34:47] | I’m going with you. | 我跟你走 |
| [34:50] | How are you doing? | 你好吗 |
| [34:52] | – You’re a maniac. – Let’s sit. | -你是个疯子 -坐吧 |
| [34:54] | – Great. – I’m better now that you came…. | -太棒了 -你一来我感觉好多了 |
| [34:56] | Unless your breasts expel Vodka and tonic, | 除非你的胸能喷出伏特加和汤尼水 |
| [34:58] | you can feel free to leave. | 否则的话你可以走了 |
| [35:00] | Oh, don’t worry, baby, the drinks will be here any minute. | 别担心 宝贝 喝的东西随时到 |
| [35:04] | Well, in the meantime, I am obligated to inform you… | 不过与此同时 我有义务告诉你 |
| [35:08] | …pursuant to Megan’s law, that I am a convicted sex offender. | 依据梅根法案 我曾被判性侵犯 |
| [35:13] | So how old are you? | 那么 你有多大 |
| [35:15] | Okay, fine. Rape’s not funny, but murder can be. | 好吧 强奸不好玩 但谋杀会很有趣的 |
| [35:19] | Murder’s not funny either. | 谋杀也没意思 |
| [35:20] | Maybe not to you, but if the murderer was a clown… | 对你可能是 但如果谋杀者曾是个小丑 |
| [35:23] | …that would be funny to me. | 那对我来说就很有趣 |
| [35:26] | How is that funny? | 怎么会 |
| [35:27] | Because he is happy on the outside but sad on the inside. | 因为他外表开心 内心悲伤 |
| [35:33] | What? | 什么 |
| [35:35] | Sad clown wanna kill somebody? | 悲伤的小丑想杀人 |
| [35:41] | – Tear. – Get away from me. Don’t touch me. | -眼泪 -离我远点 别碰我 |
| [35:43] | Wait. Here. Here. | 等等 拿着 |
| [35:45] | – What’s wrong with him? – Oh, he had a bad breakup. | -他有什么毛病 -他刚刚分手 |
| [35:49] | You have a friend for him? | 能找个朋友陪他吗 |
| [35:50] | My friends would never put up with that. | 我朋友绝对受不了这种态度的 |
| [35:52] | Okay, I’m gonna call a quick timeout here… | 很好 我要中场休息了 |
| [35:55] | …while the lesser comedians of the group… | 好让我们的二流搞笑高手 |
| [35:57] | …have a chance to make their own stripper abuse joke. | 有机会对他们的脱衣女讲粗俗的笑话 |
| [36:00] | – What is your prob–? – Chh! | -你有什么问 -嘘 |
| [36:02] | I would rather mainline Drano… | 我宁愿自残 |
| [36:04] | …than listen to another second of your whore prattle. | 也不愿听你这个妓女来批评我 |
| [36:06] | Less talkie. More booby. Now. | 少说话 多行动 从现在开始 |
| [36:09] | You know what, I don’t need this. | 我才不想在这待着 |
| [36:10] | Said the fat girl to the cupcake. | 丑妞就这样对好心人说话 |
| [36:13] | – I’m sorry. – Bye, whore. | -抱歉 -拜 妓女 |
| [36:14] | Candy, I’ll miss you. | 甜心 我会想你的 |
| [36:16] | Bambi, I thought we had something. | 斑比 我以为我们之间很来电的 |
| [36:18] | Three down, only 97 more to go. | 三个没戏了 只剩九十七个了 |
| [36:19] | Good job, dumb-ass. | 干得好 蠢货 |
| [36:32] | And now coming to the auxiliary stage… | 现在登上二号舞台的美女 |
| [36:36] | …she has russian hands and roman fingers. | 有俄罗斯的手掌和罗马的手指 |
| [36:39] | Give it up for Natasha. | 请为娜塔莎鼓掌 |
| [36:42] | –for the heart | 加速的心跳 |
| [36:45] | Dull headache | 隐约的头疼 |
| [36:48] | This is just the start of a mad pursuit | 只是疯狂追求的开始 |
| [36:53] | Chasing down the telephone wire | 查询电话号码 |
| [37:01] | Racing down the road You can’t lose her | 在大街上追寻 你不能失去她 |
| [37:09] | You’ll try to skip town she’ll find you | 你想逃离小镇 她会找到你 |
| [37:12] | Are you guys drinking water? We don’t allow Mormons in here. | 你们在喝水吗 这里不欢迎摩门教徒的 |
| [37:16] | Yes, but we’re also drinking Thug Passion. | 当然 不过我们也喝暴徒激情 |
| [37:18] | It’s what your mom put in your | 就是你妈放在你奶瓶里的那种 |
| [37:20] | bottle so she could watch young and the restless. | 然后才能照顾烦人的小孩 |
| [37:22] | My mom used Bourbon. | 我妈用的是波旁威士忌 |
| [37:24] | All the sugar in Cognac made me hyper. | 放在科涅克白兰地里的糖让我精力旺盛 |
| [37:26] | And judging by the distance between your eyes… | 另外 根据你眼睛的间距判断 |
| [37:28] | …I’d say your mom drank | 当你还在子宫里时 |
| [37:30] | it all while you were still in the womb. | 你妈就把它喝完了 |
| [37:33] | Did she just make a fetal alcohol joke? | 她刚说了个胎儿与酒的笑话 |
| [37:35] | – Whoa! – Wait, wait, wait. | -等等 -等等 |
| [37:38] | When you’re done changing or whatever… | 等你换完衣服后 |
| [37:40] | …come back over here and keep talking shit to him. | 请你回来继续和他乱扯 |
| [37:43] | – Please. – Thank you. | -拜托 -谢谢 |
| [37:47] | – Oh, god. – Which one do you want? | -上帝 -你要哪个 |
| [37:49] | – I’ll take the – I’ll take the one in the pink. | -我要 -我要粉色衣服的 |
| [37:52] | And now coming to the main stage, | 现在登上1号舞台的美女 |
| [37:54] | she’s magic on the bowl. | 是舞台上的魔术师 |
| [37:55] | She’s whoredini. | 她是舞后 |
| [37:57] | If we get a champagne room, we can do anything we want. | 如果我们去开个香槟房 想做什么都行 |
| [38:01] | If we get a hotel room, we can do anything too. | 如果去酒店开房 也一样 |
| [38:04] | True. But then I don’t get paid. | 是的 不过我就没钱赚了 |
| [38:07] | I’ll give you $20. | 我会给你20美元 |
| [38:09] | It’s more like 400, baby. | 好像四百美元才对 宝贝 |
| [38:11] | – Four hundred? – Oh, yeah. | -四百美元 -是的 |
| [38:13] | But you’re cute and funny. I’ll do it for 350. | 不过你很可爱又有趣 我只收三百五 |
| [38:19] | – Twenty-five. – Three hundred and twenty-five? | -二十五 -三百二十五 |
| [38:22] | No, just 25. | 不 最多二十五块 |
| [38:24] | I have to pay the club $100 just to get the room for an hour. | 我得付夜总会一小时一百美元的开房费 |
| [38:27] | That’s okay. My attention span won’t last for an hour. | 没事 我的激情不会持续超过一小时的 |
| [38:32] | – Asshole. – I’ll give you $30. | -混蛋 -我给你三十 |
| [38:34] | – That won’t even buy our drinks. – Oh, shit. | -这点钱买酒都不够 -该死 |
| [38:38] | That’s what you get. | 这就是你的下场 |
| [38:39] | Hold on. If I’m so cute and funny, | 等等 如果我真这么可爱有趣 |
| [38:41] | why are you even charging me? | 为何还要收费 |
| [38:42] | That’s no way to start a relationship. | 恋爱可不是这样谈的 |
| [38:44] | Who said I wanted a relationship? I already have a boyfriend. | 谁说我要恋爱 我已经有男朋友了 |
| [38:48] | I don’t want that kind of relationship. | 宝贝 我才不要那种关系 |
| [38:50] | I just wanna fuck you. | 我只是想上你 |
| [38:51] | – Just fuck me? – Yeah, I’d make a great fuck buddy. | -只是上我 -对 我会是很棒的炮友 |
| [38:54] | All right, potential fuck buddy, how big is your dick? | 那好 潜在的炮友 你的老二有多大 |
| [38:58] | How big is your mouth? | 你嘴有多大 |
| [38:59] | She’s got eyes as big as her titties. | 她眼睛如奶子一般大 |
| [39:02] | And, boy, is she a cute little piece of tail. It’s Bambi. | 她真是个可爱的小尤物 班比 |
| [39:20] | If you must know… | 如果你非要打听的话 |
| [39:22] | …my parents yelled at me, sent me to my room and ignored me. | 我父母曾对我大吼 把我丢进房里不理我 |
| [39:26] | If I was your mom, I would | 如果我是你妈 也会 |
| [39:27] | have locked you up and ignored you too. | 把你锁起来不理你 |
| [39:29] | If you were my mom, I would’ve been | 如果你是我妈 养大我的 |
| [39:31] | raised by a talentless hooker rather than a shrew. | 就是一个无能的妓女 而不是一个泼妇 |
| [39:34] | There’s a win-win. | 可以两者兼得的 |
| [39:35] | You’re awfully bitter for a pasty-faced shut-in. | 你这个被禁闭的面饼脸真是可恶得要命 |
| [39:38] | Always been this mean, or did | 你一直都这么刻薄吗 或是因为 |
| [39:39] | some girl just trade you in for a better model? | 某个女孩把你抛弃 找了个更好的 |
| [39:42] | Holy shit. | 天哪 |
| [39:43] | She’s like a hot Miss Cleo. | 她就像个火辣的占卜师 |
| [39:44] | Yeah, his girlfriend did just dump him. | 对 他女朋友确实把他甩了 |
| [39:47] | For Grillionaire, of all people. | 找了吉利内尔 |
| [39:48] | Grillionaire? | 吉利内尔 |
| [39:50] | Like, “How they do, baby”? | 就那个唱”感觉如何 宝贝”的那个 |
| [39:51] | Grillionaire with the diamonds on his teeth? | 镶钻牙的吉利内尔 |
| [39:56] | She may be a vacuous slut with no taste, | 或许她是个没品味 无知的妓女 |
| [39:59] | but at least she’s not a stripper. | 但至少她不是脱衣舞女 |
| [40:01] | You think you’re so clever. | 你自以为自己很聪明 |
| [40:03] | I know a hundred insecure assholes just like you. | 但我认识无数个像你这样没安全感的混蛋 |
| [40:06] | I’m sure all your mother’s boyfriends were great guys. | 我相信你妈所有的男朋友都是好男人 |
| [40:09] | If I had a dollar for | 如果我每听一个破碎家庭 |
| [40:11] | every broken-home joke… | 的笑话就能得一美元 |
| [40:12] | …I’d have enough to buy Comic-Con tickets for you… | 那我的钱就够给你 |
| [40:14] | …and all the other Orc-Mage | 和你那些玩兽人法师的 |
| [40:16] | failures on your buddy list. | 窝囊废朋友们买动漫年会门票了 |
| [40:19] | Whatever, I’ve gotta go. | 不管怎样 我得走了 |
| [40:21] | Whoa! No, no, no. | 等等 别走 |
| [40:23] | – Stay, please. – Finish him. | -求你留下来 -搞定他 |
| [40:25] | No, I’ve gotta get home soon. | 不行 我真的必须尽快回家 |
| [40:26] | No, you need to keep talking shit to him. | 不 你得继续跟他乱扯 |
| [40:28] | Yeah, he can’t stand it when | 上帝 当一个女人发现了 |
| [40:30] | a woman that gets the best of him. Stay, please. | 他优秀的一面时 他就受不了了 留下来吧 |
| [40:32] | That’s unfortunate because he’s a good-looking guy. | 不行 因为他是个帅哥 |
| [40:35] | I’ve learned my lesson with guys like your friend. | 我已经得到过类似的教训了 |
| [40:37] | No, he’s different. | 不 他不同 |
| [40:38] | I promise you, there is a flower inside that onion. | 我向你保证他是洋葱里的一朵美丽的花 |
| [40:41] | – You just have to peel back the layers… – Peel away. | -你只需剥掉外表 -剥掉 |
| [40:43] | …and fight back the tears. | 还有忍住眼泪 |
| [40:45] | I’ll pay your rate. | 我会付你工资的 |
| [40:46] | – Just talk shit to him. – Please. | -只要留下来和他乱扯就行 -拜托 |
| [40:49] | He needs this. | 他需要这些 |
| [40:53] | Dance, monkey. | 跳吧 猴子 |
| [40:55] | Dance for your dollar. | 为你的钱跳吧 |
| [40:58] | Could’ve done without that. | 没钱你就是不跳 |
| [41:00] | – I’ll pick it up for you. – You can keep that. | -我帮你拣 -这钱你可以留着 |
| [41:02] | All I have to do is insult him? No dancing? | 我所要做的只是侮辱他 不用跳吗 |
| [41:04] | – That’s it. – Great. | -就是这样 -很好 |
| [41:07] | – I can’t believe that worked. – Fuck. | -居然成功了 -靠 |
| [41:11] | He might have you there. | 你可能斗不过他 |
| [41:13] | I’m Lara. | 我是劳拉 |
| [41:14] | What’s your name? | 你叫什么 |
| [41:16] | It’s Drew, but why don’t we skip the pleasantries… | 德鲁 不过我们不如省掉过场 |
| [41:19] | …and go to the part where you call me captain Kirk… | 直接去巷子里你帮我手淫 |
| [41:22] | …and give me a hand job in the alley? | 并称我为科克舰长 |
| [41:25] | You’re a Star Trek nerd? | 你很爱看星际旅行吗 |
| [41:27] | Color me shocked. | 真让我吃惊 |
| [41:29] | Live long and prosper, dork. | “长寿与繁荣” 笨蛋 |
| [41:32] | Okay, I’m a dork? | 好吧 我是个笨蛋吗 |
| [41:34] | You are the one with a video-game character’s name. | 你才是那个跟游戏人物名字一样的人 |
| [41:39] | Genius. That game came out after I was born. | 真聪明 那游戏在我出生之后才发售的 |
| [41:43] | I was named after Agustin Lara. | 我的名字来自于奥古斯丁・劳拉 |
| [41:45] | Wait, wait, wait, who is that? | 等等 那是谁 |
| [41:46] | A famous Mexican intellectual. | 一个有名的墨西哥知识分子 |
| [41:50] | That’s a funny joke. | 真有趣 |
| [41:52] | No funnier than you | 没有你发现你女友 |
| [41:53] | Catching your girlfriend blowing Grillionaire. | 重击吉利内尔那么有趣 |
| [41:55] | Body blow, body blow, body blow, left hook. | 重击 重击 重击 左勾拳 |
| [42:00] | Wait a second, wait a second. | 等等 等等 |
| [42:01] | You like “Mike Tyson punch out”? | 你喜欢迈克泰森拳击吗 |
| [42:03] | Bullshit, bullshit. | 胡扯 胡扯 |
| [42:04] | Who was your favorite guy to fight? Quick. | 你最喜欢和谁对打 快 |
| [42:07] | Soda Popinski, because he was | 苏大・波品斯基 因为他在图片里 |
| [42:09] | drinking a 40 in his picture. | 总是在喝40酒 |
| [42:10] | Oh! Dude, this is your dream girl. | 老兄 这是你梦想中的女孩 |
| [42:13] | If you don’t make this happen… | 如果你不有所行动的话 |
| [42:15] | …You will be a disgrace to the entire “Halo” Community. | 你就是给整个”光环”星球丢脸 |
| [42:18] | – How dare you? – Oh, I will destroy you in “Halo.” | -你敢 -我会在”光环”里毁了你的 |
| [42:22] | Oh, yeah, sure you will. | 你肯定会 |
| [42:23] | And you’re an exotic dancer, not a stripper. | 而且你是个外国舞女 不是脱衣舞女 |
| [42:27] | You can’t handle a girl… | 你无法操控一个 |
| [42:28] | …who’s better than you at some stupid game? | 比你玩游戏还厉害的女孩吗 |
| [42:30] | Okay, you can beat me at “Halo”? | 好吧 你能在”光环”里打败我 |
| [42:33] | Hey, while we’re in this fantasy land… | 当我们在这梦幻岛上时 |
| [42:36] | …why don’t we drive your flying car over to the bank… | 为什么我们不开着你的飞车去银行 |
| [42:39] | …and get you approved for a low interest home loan. | 给你申请一个低利息的购房贷款 |
| [42:41] | I bet $100 she’ll beat you in “Halo.” | 我赌一百美元 她能在”光环”里打败你 |
| [42:43] | I’m not betting on a video game. | 我才不会对一个游戏下注 |
| [42:45] | Gambling is illegal. | 赌博是非法的 |
| [42:47] | What? | 什么 |
| [42:51] | I smell pussy. | 我闻到了娘们的味道 |
| [42:53] | Then douche before work. | 那就在工作前冲洗一下 |
| [42:55] | Two hundred dollars. | 两百美元 |
| [42:57] | I’m not– I can’t leave– | 我不 我不能离开 |
| [42:59] | Dan’s bachelor party is the whole reason we’re here. | 我们是因为丹的单身汉聚会才这里的 |
| [43:01] | No, don’t let me keep you here. | 不 别让我成为你留下的理由 |
| [43:03] | Nothing would make me happier | 没有什么比看见她在游戏里 |
| [43:05] | Than to see her whip your ass at a video game. | 把你打得屁滚尿流更让我开心了 |
| [43:08] | I would consider it if we had | 除非我们有个能玩的地方 |
| [43:10] | a place to play and I had my special controller. | 而且还要有我特制的控制器 我才会考虑 |
| [43:13] | Well, you’re in luck, because my shift just ended. | 你很走运 因为我刚下班 |
| [43:17] | We can play at my house, I have everything. | 我们可以去我家玩 我什么都有 |
| [43:19] | Except your candy-ass little controller. | 除了你那个胆小鬼控制器 |
| [43:22] | – Then it’s a bet. – No. | -那就赌定了 -不 |
| [43:24] | I’m not going to some vile stripper den. | 我才不会去可耻的脱衣舞女的家里 |
| [43:28] | You know her baby daddy is just waiting there for me… | 她孩子的爸爸肯定在那等着我 |
| [43:30] | …so he can roll me and steal my organs. | 把我打倒就可以偷我的器官了 |
| [43:33] | How are you friends with this guy? | 你们怎么会和这个人做朋友 |
| [43:35] | I have no idea who used to be attracted to him. | 我不知道谁能被这种人迷住 |
| [43:38] | I don’t know. | 我也不知道 |
| [43:38] | Probably has something to do with | 可能是与 |
| [43:40] | my caustic sense of humor… | 我刻薄的幽默感有关 |
| [43:42] | …And the inability of your | 还和你的每个位继父无法向你展示 |
| [43:43] | various stepfathers to show you any affection. | 他们的关爱有点关系 |
| [43:47] | Probably. | 可能吧 |
| [43:50] | Fellas, I’ve got a message from the bar staff. | 伙计们 我收到一条酒保发来的短信 |
| [43:52] | Tonight’s house special is Thug’s Passion | 今晚的特别酒水是暴徒激情 |
| [43:55] | And it’s two for one. | 而且还是买一送一 |
| [43:58] | – Hey, honey, what’s up? – Hey. | -喂 亲爱的 怎么了 -喂 |
| [44:00] | You’ve finally calmed down? | 你终于冷静下来了吗 |
| [44:02] | Yeah. You know, I’m not mad at you anymore. | 我已经不生你的气了 |
| [44:04] | Gee, thanks. | 天哪 谢谢 |
| [44:06] | – Are you having fun? – Oh, yeah. | -玩得开心吗 -是的 |
| [44:08] | Strip clubs are all the same. | 脱衣舞夜总会都一样 |
| [44:09] | How’s Tucker handling the no-touch rule? | 塔克是怎么处理禁摸条例的 |
| [44:12] | You know, he’s coping. | 他正在努力中 |
| [44:14] | Welcome to the stage, she’s got plenty of fright… | 有请 她有着许多高空表演的 |
| [44:18] | …with none of the height. | 惊险经验 |
| [44:20] | She’s Salem very own Rainbow Sprite. | 她是赛伦的独家彩虹精灵 |
| [44:22] | – Dan, where are you? – A club. | -丹 你在哪 -酒吧里 |
| [44:24] | No, where are you? Geographically. | 不 你在什么地方 具体地点 |
| [44:29] | Close by. | 在附近 |
| [44:34] | I can’t believe this. | 我简直不能相信 |
| [44:36] | Young man, I don’t think we’re gonna need this anymore. | 年轻人 我们可能不需要这些了 |
| [44:40] | – Put Drew on the phone. – He’s leaving with a stripper. | -让德鲁来接电话 -他和一个脱衣舞女一起走了 |
| [44:43] | Dan, we both know that’s ridiculous. | 丹 我们都知道那是在撒谎 |
| [44:44] | Put Drew on the phone. | 让德鲁接电话 |
| [44:45] | Hey. It’s Kristy. | 是克瑞斯蒂 |
| [44:47] | She wants to talk to you. She thinks we’re in Richmond. | 她想要和你说话 她觉得我们在里士满 |
| [44:50] | – Just tell her we’re in Richmond. – Yeah. | -那就告诉她我们在里士满 -没错 |
| [44:53] | – Hi, Kristy. – Drew, where are you guys? | -你好 克瑞斯蒂 -德鲁 你们在哪 |
| [44:55] | We’re at a strip club in Salem. Gotta go. | 我们在赛伦的一个脱衣舞厅 我得挂了 |
| [44:59] | I’m not lying for you Cretins. | 我不会为你们这些白痴撒谎的 |
| [45:00] | My moral compass doesn’t point directly down my pants. | 我的价值观不受下半身控制 |
| [45:03] | Dude, what did–? | 老兄 你 |
| [45:05] | What do you–? | 你这是 |
| [45:07] | – Fuck. – Fuck. | -操 -操 |
| [45:09] | Dan, why did you go to Salem? | 丹 你为什么要去赛伦 |
| [45:11] | I don’t know. Tucker…. | 我不知道 塔克 |
| [45:13] | Again, Dan? | 丹 又是他 |
| [45:15] | Again with the Tucker. | 又是和塔克一起 |
| [45:16] | What are you, his keeper? | 你是谁 他的监护人吗 |
| [45:18] | Is that what you are? You just hang out, | 这就是真实的你吗 你就这样陪着他 |
| [45:20] | Swoop in and save him and take the hit? | 冲进去把他救出来然后承担损失 |
| [45:22] | – I don’t know. – I don’t understand why you lied to me. | -我不知道 -我不明白你为什么要撒谎 |
| [45:26] | We promised that we’d always be honest with each other. | 我们承诺过对彼此要永远诚实 |
| [45:29] | I don’t know why we lied. I just– | 我不知道我们为什么要撒谎 我只是 |
| [45:31] | Enough with the “We.” | 不要再说我们了 |
| [45:33] | I don’t care why Tucker did what he did. | 我不管为什么塔克要那样做 |
| [45:35] | I only care what you did. | 我只关心你做了什么 |
| [45:39] | Honey, you’re really that mad? | 亲爱的 你真的那么生气吗 |
| [45:41] | I don’t know what to think. I gotta go. | 我不知道该说什么了 我得挂了 |
| [45:45] | Fuck. | 操 |
| [45:49] | Well, that’s the last time I listen to you. | 这是最后一次我陪着你鬼混了 |
| [45:51] | Dude, whatever, she’ll get over it. | 老兄 不管怎样 她会没事的 |
| [45:53] | Tell her it’s my fault. | 跟她说是我的错 |
| [45:54] | It is your fucking fault. | 本来就他妈是你的错 |
| [45:56] | Six of one. Dude, don’t sweat it, man. | 没什么区别 老兄 不用这么紧张 |
| [45:59] | What happens in Salem, stays in Salem. | 在塞伦发生的事就留给塞伦吧 |
| [46:02] | Well, clearly it doesn’t. My fiance, | 当然没什么了 她是我未婚妻 |
| [46:03] | who I lied to because of you, asshole… | 因为你我才对她撒谎 混蛋 |
| [46:05] | …is in Richmond and she’s pissed. | 她现在在里士满而且非常生气 |
| [46:07] | It’s all right. Here. | 没事 给 |
| [46:10] | This is the 20-minute call for | 接下来的20分钟召唤 |
| [46:12] | all dancers to the main stage… | 所有舞者到前台表演 |
| [46:15] | …because it is time for bachelor party duty. | 因为这是单身汉聚会的职责 |
| [46:20] | -Dude. -Someone needs a spanking. | -老兄 -有人要被打屁股 |
| [46:22] | Dude, this is it, this is it. | 哥们 机会来了 该你了 |
| [46:24] | You need a spanking, man. This is it. | 你需要被打屁股 哥们 |
| [46:26] | Are you fired up? This is for you, go out on stage, man. | 你情绪高涨了吗 这就是给你准备的 上台吧 老兄 |
| [46:30] | She’s my cherry pie | 她是我的樱桃派 |
| [46:33] | Cool drink of water such a sweet surprise | 如冷饮般甜美的惊喜 |
| [46:35] | Let’s give it up for rainbow sprite, everybody. | 让我们大家鼓掌欢迎彩虹精灵 |
| [46:38] | I’ll be right back. Stay there. | 我马上就回来 在这等我 |
| [46:41] | Take your time, dickhead. | 好好玩吧 混蛋 |
| [46:43] | – Where are you going? – I just, um– | -你要去哪 -我只是 |
| [46:45] | – I’ll be right back. – What about your friend? | -我很快回来 -你朋友怎么办 |
| [46:47] | Oh, he’s fine. He’s fine. Don’t worry about him. Big boy. | 他没事 他很好 别担心他 |
| [47:00] | Fuck. | 操 |
| [47:02] | Hey, I’m Gulliver. How are you doing? | 我是格里夫 你好 |
| [47:08] | She’s sweet and sticky, but she won’t give you a cavity. | 她甜美而且黏人 但她不会为你准备空穴 |
| [47:11] | – Fuck. – Let’s say hello to Candy. | -操 -让我们向甜心问好 |
| [47:14] | This place sucks. | 这地方烂透了 |
| [47:15] | You wanna get out of here? Do something more fun? | 你想不想离开这 玩点更有意思的 |
| [47:30] | I need to tell you something before we go inside. | 进去之前我得先告诉你一些事 |
| [47:33] | Oh, I fucking knew it. | 我早他妈的知道了 |
| [47:35] | I’m gonna get jumped. They’re gonna take my kidneys. | 我得下车 他们会拿走我的肾 |
| [47:38] | No. I have a son. He’ll be asleep. | 不 我有个儿子 他应该睡了 |
| [47:42] | But I wanted to tell you before | 但我想提前告诉你 |
| [47:43] | You tripped over his army men in the living room. | 别被他放在客厅里的玩具军人绊倒了 |
| [47:51] | What’s his name? | 他叫什么 |
| [47:52] | Jack. He’s 7. | 杰克 他七岁了 |
| [47:57] | Is he named after his baby | 是以他爹的名字 |
| [47:58] | daddy or the liquor on which he was conceived? | 还是以你们当晚喝的酒命名的 |
| [48:01] | Neither. It’s just a strong name. | 都不是 只是一个强壮的名字 |
| [48:04] | I think a little boy needs a strong name. | 我认为小男孩需要个强壮的名字 |
| [48:07] | I’m not a fan of those androgynous names… | 我不喜欢那些男女不分的名字 |
| [48:09] | …like Pat or Jesse or Drew. | 像派特 杰西或者德鲁 |
| [48:13] | Bitch. | 贱人 |
| [48:17] | I can’t say I’m shocked. | 我不得不说我很惊讶 |
| [48:19] | Having a kid is one of the top three | 有孩子是脱衣舞女掩饰自己职业 |
| [48:21] | excuses strippers use to justify their career choice. | 的三大理由之一 |
| [48:24] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [48:26] | And what are the other two? | 其他两个是什么 |
| [48:27] | The paying my way through college lie heads up that list. | 第一名是为了付大学学费 |
| [48:31] | That’s in the whore logic hall of fame. | 记录在妓女逻辑名誉殿堂里 |
| [48:43] | And the other one? | 另一个呢 |
| [48:47] | It’s better than being a hooker or doing porn. | 这样比当妓女或者拍色情片要好 |
| [48:54] | You know, strippers don’t actually say that. | 要知道脱衣舞女并不那么说 |
| [48:58] | Bullshit, they don’t. You need to watch Maury Povich. | 胡扯 你应该看看莫瑞・波维奇的节目 |
| [49:06] | Jack, aren’t you supposed to be in bed? | 杰克 你不是该睡觉了吗 |
| [49:09] | Bunny said I could stay up and play. | 巴尼说我可以继续玩 |
| [49:11] | But it doesn’t matter. Your bedtime is your bedtime. | 和那没关系 你该知道自己什么时间睡觉 |
| [49:19] | Greetings. | 你好 |
| [49:29] | The army men the good guys? | 那些军人是好人吗 |
| [49:33] | I see you have some robot truck men here too. | 我看到这里还有些机器卡车人 |
| [49:36] | You shouldn’t mix genres like that. | 你不该把他们混在一起 |
| [49:38] | It screws up the morale | 这样有损军心 |
| [49:39] | and jeopardizes the efficacy of your tactics. | 而且有损战斗力 |
| [49:44] | Okay, I guess we can work with it. | 我们可以重组一下 |
| [49:47] | What exactly are you playing? | 你究竟是在玩什么 |
| [49:52] | Well, the Gi Bobs are gonna surprise attack those legos. | 这些特种部队会突袭那些乐高玩具 |
| [50:01] | I know that you are but 7 years old. | 我知道你才7岁 |
| [50:06] | This rigmarole you have here just won’t work. | 你说的这些废话都没用 |
| [50:09] | Your flanks are exposed. | 你的侧翼无人支援 |
| [50:11] | You’re vulnerable to an enfilade from lego artillery. | 对于乐高炮兵的抵抗能力非常脆弱 |
| [50:15] | I think it’s time that you learn the proper way… | 我觉得该是你学学怎么 |
| [50:19] | …to set up an l-shaped ambush. | 建造L形伏击阵的时候了 |
| [50:24] | What’s a flank? | 什么是侧翼 |
| [50:29] | It’s a good thing I came. | 我来了真是件好事 |
| [50:30] | And now, it’s time for our man of the hour… | 现在 是为我们风云人物登场的时候了 |
| [50:33] | …our bachelor of the night. | 今晚的单身汉 |
| [50:35] | Give it up for big Dan. | 为丹鼓掌 |
| [50:57] | I had a baby named Jane | 我有个宝贝叫做简 |
| [50:59] | She could shake that thing | 她可以摇晃那东西 |
| [51:00] | Said her daddy used to hang with Johnny Coltrane | 她说她爸爸曾和约翰・柯川混在一起 |
| [51:03] | She sang a soul train with a friend named Jen | 她唱着灵魂列车和她的朋友珍 |
| [51:05] | Her booty was bigger than a mercedes-benz | 她的阴道比奔驰还要大 |
| [51:23] | No, no, no. | 不不不 |
| [51:25] | I said off. | 放手 |
| [51:28] | No, no, no. | 不不不 |
| [51:44] | You asshole. | 你这混蛋 |
| [51:48] | – Get on your feet. – Come on, asshole. Party’s over. | -站起来 -快 混蛋 聚会结束了 |
| [51:51] | – Yeah. – Get out of here. | -没错 -从这滚出去 |
| [51:56] | That’s it. | 好了 |
| [52:00] | – Asshole. – Okay. | -混蛋 -好的 |
| [52:02] | Your army men are set up in the perfect ambush. | 你的军人们现在形成伏击阵型 |
| [52:07] | Once the legos get to the kill zone, | 一旦乐高军到达死亡区域 |
| [52:09] | No matter what they do, they’re toast. | 不管他们怎么做 他们都死定了 |
| [52:12] | Yes. | 太棒了 |
| [52:16] | You might not grow up to be a failure | 也许你长大后不会成为生活的 |
| [52:17] | at life after all, kid. | 失败者的 孩子 |
| [52:19] | Okay. Now it’s time for bed. | 好了 该睡觉了 |
| [52:23] | Say thank you to Drew for | 和德鲁说谢谢 |
| [52:26] | teaching you how to attack your legos. | 谢谢他教怎么攻击你的乐高军人 |
| [52:29] | Thanks, Drew. | 谢谢 德鲁 |
| [52:31] | Tomorrow can you teach me other ambushes? | 明天你可以教我其他的伏击阵型吗 |
| [52:34] | I think I’ve stunted your growth enough for one week. | 我认为我已经阻碍你下周的成长了 |
| [52:39] | But maybe next time I can | 也许下次我可以 |
| [52:40] | teach you how to use standoffish humor… | 教你怎么运用冷幽默 |
| [52:42] | …as a mask for your inability | 来掩饰自己的无能 |
| [52:44] | to relate to people on a personal level. | 以发挥更大的人格影响力 |
| [52:46] | Yay. | 好啊 |
| [52:48] | – Yeah. – Good night, Drew. | -好的 -晚安 德鲁 |
| [52:50] | Good night, Jack. | 晚安杰克 |
| [53:05] | Fuck. | 操 |
| [53:12] | What the hell are you doing? | 你他妈的在干什么 |
| [53:18] | Don’t mind me, boys. I’m just baking a quiche. | 别管我 伙计们 我只是在烤蛋糕 |
| [53:21] | Are you pissing? That’s an actual offense. | 你在尿尿吗 那可是犯罪 |
| [53:27] | Mr. Plastic-Badge gonna give me a ticket? | 塑料徽章先生要给我开罚单吗 |
| [53:30] | What the fuck did you just say? | 你他妈的说什么 |
| [53:31] | How will I ever face my life again? | 我怎么才能再次面对我的人生 |
| [53:34] | Let me ask you something, deputy dipshit. | 让我问你点事情 混蛋警官 |
| [53:38] | Are you a cop… | 你当警察 |
| [53:39] | …because you have a GED | 是因为你有毕业文凭 |
| [53:41] | or because you have erectile dysfunction? | 还是因为你勃起功能有障碍呢 |
| [53:44] | – I’m really curious to know. – Hey, hey. | -我真的很想知道 -喂喂 |
| [53:46] | – Are you goddamn shitting me? – What the fuck? | -你他妈的在朝我尿尿吗 -操 |
| [53:49] | Fuck. Fuck. | 操 操 |
| [53:52] | “You didn’t lie to her, Dan. I did.” | 你没有对她撒谎 丹 是我撒了谎 |
| [53:54] | “You didn’t lie to her, Dan. I did.” | 你没有对她撒谎 丹 是我撒了谎 |
| [53:56] | Stupid shit. You know what they did? | 蠢驴 你知道他们做了什么吗 |
| [53:58] | They left me at a strip club. | 他们把我留在一个脱衣舞夜总会 |
| [53:59] | My friends are fucking idiots. | 我的朋友是他妈的白痴 |
| [54:01] | “And the syrup nugget, it | 还有那些糖块 |
| [54:03] | explodes in your mouth and then I’ll skull fuck you.” | 它会在你的嘴里融化 操 |
| [54:06] | Fucking stupid. | 真他妈傻逼 |
| [54:08] | Fuck it. I gotta get the fuck | 操 我得赶紧出去 |
| [54:10] | out of here and call her. I don’t have friends. | 然后给她打电话 我没有朋友 |
| [54:12] | My friends are douche bags. | 我朋友都是些蠢货 |
| [54:14] | You guys are probably more | 可能跟你们一起出去玩都比 |
| [54:15] | fun to hang out with than my fucking friends. | 我那些臭朋友要有意思得多 |
| [54:18] | They’re fucking stupid. | 他们蠢死了 |
| [54:21] | All I wanted was a bouncy castle. | 我只想要一个充气城堡 |
| [54:23] | A bouncy castle at the reception. Just a bouncy castle. | 一个充气城堡里的迎宾宴会而已 |
| [54:26] | I gotta get out. Gotta call my wife. | 我得出去 给我老婆打电话 |
| [54:27] | She’s never gonna take me back. | 她永远都不会再接受我了 |
| [54:29] | Who’s with me? Who’s with me? | 谁和我一起 谁支持我 |
| [54:32] | Somebody has gotta be with me. | 总得有个人和我一起 |
| [54:33] | I am the only one who speaks English. | 我是唯一一个说英语的 |
| [54:37] | – That’s no problem, isn’t it. – What? | -没有关系的 -什么 |
| [54:47] | – Yeah. – Yeah. | -好的 -好的 |
| [54:49] | Yeah. | 好的 |
| [54:51] | Who’s with me? Who–? Yeah. | 谁和我一起 谁 好的 |
| [54:59] | Revolution! | 革命 |
| [55:03] | Hey, look, it’s the cops. | 看 是警察 |
| [55:05] | All right, assholes. Last chance. | 可以了 混蛋们 最后的机会 |
| [55:09] | What the hell is going on in here? | 这发生什么事了 |
| [55:10] | Holy shit, it’s like police academy, only gayer. | 天啊 像在警察学校一样 只是更放荡 |
| [55:16] | And you…. | 你 |
| [55:18] | Lights out, motherfucker. | 关灯 混账东西 |
| [55:19] | It’s a fucking joke, it’s a joke. | 开玩笑 只是个玩笑 |
| [55:25] | Halo 1? Shotgun gun wizard was the best board. | 光环 1 猎枪巫师最好用 |
| [55:28] | Totally. | 没错 |
| [55:32] | Jack’s a good kid. | 杰克是个好孩子 |
| [55:33] | Damn it. | 该死 |
| [55:35] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [55:37] | I mean, I usually wanna kick most kids into a wood chipper. | 我经常想把大多数孩子塞进绞肉机里 |
| [55:41] | How are you kicking my ass? | 你是怎么打败我的 |
| [55:43] | That means a lot. | 这对我来说很重要 |
| [55:45] | He’s had a tough time since his dad left. | 他爸爸离开后他一直很难过 |
| [55:50] | I told you I was better. | 我跟你说过我更厉害 |
| [55:52] | – I can beat Koreans. – Why did he leave? | -我可以打败韩国人 -他为什么离开 |
| [55:56] | Son of a bitch, where are you even shooting me from? | 操 你从哪里打死的我 |
| [56:00] | He thought that I was cheating on him… | 他觉得我背着他乱搞 |
| [56:02] | …so he decided to get even | 所以他决定报复我 |
| [56:04] | and screw anything that moved. | 并且搞砸一切 |
| [56:06] | Were you? | 你乱搞了吗 |
| [56:09] | I mean, it wouldn’t surprise me. | 那并不会令我惊讶 |
| [56:11] | Your whole gender is hardwired for whoredom. | 你的性别与卖淫有着紧密的联系 |
| [56:14] | Are you in pink armor? | 你穿着粉红盔甲吗 |
| [56:16] | I hate it when men randomly bash women. | 我讨厌男人随便打女人 |
| [56:18] | It’s like this pathetic defense mechanism you guys put up… | 好比男人发现自己爱上了一个 |
| [56:22] | …when you know you’re | 不可能爱上自己的女人时 |
| [56:23] | attracted to a woman who might not be into you. | 会有可悲的自我防御情绪产生一样 |
| [56:27] | – That’s not– that’s not true. – Yes, it is. | -那 不是真的 -是真的 |
| [56:29] | It’s so much easier to call a girl a whore… | 把一个女孩称为妓女比 |
| [56:31] | …than it is to admit to yourself | 承认自己 |
| [56:32] | she’s out of your league. | 配不上她容易得多 |
| [56:35] | That is some whore logic if I’ve ever heard it. | 这可能就是我曾经听过的妓女逻辑 |
| [56:39] | Anyone is capable of being a whore, Drew. | 任何人都能成为妓女 德鲁 |
| [56:43] | Being a woman doesn’t de facto make you one. | 事实上女人并不一定就是妓女 |
| [56:46] | It does if you’re a cum-guzzling demon slut. | 如果你是魔鬼般的妓女 就有可能了 |
| [56:49] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [56:51] | But your ex is only | 但你的前任只 |
| [56:52] | Representative of herself, not her whole gender. | 代表她自己 而不是整个性别 |
| [56:55] | Her actions don’t make | 不能因她的行为 |
| [56:56] | me a whore simply because we’re both women. | 以及我们都是女人 就认为我也是妓女 |
| [57:03] | Did you cheat? | 你背着丈夫乱搞了吗 |
| [57:06] | No. | 没有 |
| [57:13] | If you ever wanna find love again | 如果你想重新找到真爱 |
| [57:15] | you’re gonna have to get over… | 你就必须克服 |
| [57:16] | …these childish notions that you have. | 你那些孩子气的想法 |
| [57:20] | If you don’t… | 如果你不做改变 |
| [57:22] | …your personal life will | 你的人生将会 |
| [57:23] | remain the steaming pile of shit that it is now. | 继续维持现状 像一堆热气腾腾的狗屎 |
| [57:28] | Game over. Killing Frenzy. | 游戏结束 多次连杀 |
| [57:33] | Motherfucker. | 操他妈的 |
| [57:36] | You’re the pink mist. | 你是那个粉色战士 |
| [57:39] | If I kiss you, will you shut up already? | 如果我吻你 你是不是早就闭嘴了 |
| [58:11] | – Are you okay? – Yeah, I’m okay. | -可以吗 -没问题 |
| [59:25] | Where am I? | 我这是在哪 |
| [59:34] | Drunk tank…. | 你个醉鬼 |
| [59:47] | That’s disgusting. | 太恶心了 |
| [59:48] | I hope that wasn’t one of you guys. | 我希望这不是你们干的 |
| [59:52] | Fuck. Can I make a call, man? | 妈的 我能打个电话吗 兄弟 |
| [59:54] | Sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [1:00:07] | – Operator. – Yeah, hi. | -接线员 -你好 |
| [1:00:09] | I need to make a collect call… | 我要打一个对方付费电话 |
| [1:00:12] | …to 323-351 -7640. | 号码是323-351-7640 |
| [1:00:19] | State your name after the beep. | 请在哔声后说出您的名字 |
| [1:00:22] | It’s Dan. | 是丹 |
| [1:00:39] | – Operator. – Uh, yeah. | -接线员 -好吧 |
| [1:00:41] | Can you try… | 你能试试 |
| [1:00:44] | …281 -555-8009? | 281-555-8009吗 |
| [1:00:50] | State your name after the beep. | 请在哔声后说出您的名字 |
| [1:00:53] | Dan. | 丹 |
| [1:01:01] | Son of a bitch, where the hell are you? | 狗娘养的 你他妈的在哪啊 |
| [1:01:03] | – I’m right here, sir. – No, not you. | -我就在这儿 -不 不是说你 |
| [1:01:05] | Look, can you just try one more? Can you try… | 能不能请你再试一次 请帮我拨 |
| [1:01:09] | 918-555-7640 …918-555-7640? | |
| [1:01:14] | State your name after the beep. | 请在哔声后说出您的名字 |
| [1:01:16] | What the fuck? Are you fucking with me? | 你他妈怎么回事 没听见我说话吗 |
| [1:01:18] | It’s Dan, just dial the fucking phone | 我是丹 就他妈拨个电话而已 |
| [1:01:21] | so I don’t spend the last of my days in– | 这样我就不用待在这了 |
| [1:01:21] | Fuck! | 见鬼 |
| [1:01:30] | What? | 喂 |
| [1:01:31] | This is the Salem City Jail operator with | 赛伦市监狱接线员为您转接的对方付费电话 |
| [1:01:33] | – a collect call from: – Are you fucking with me? | -来自 -你他妈的没听我讲话吗 |
| [1:01:35] | It’s Dan, dial the fucking phone | 我是丹 就他妈的拨个电话而已 |
| [1:01:38] | so I don’t spend the last of my days– | 这样我就不用待在这了 |
| [1:01:38] | – Fuck. – Daniel? | -见鬼 -是丹吗 |
| [1:01:40] | Oh, Jesus. Mrs. Jorgens? | 天哪 杰庚斯夫人 |
| [1:01:43] | What’s going on? | 发生什么事了 |
| [1:01:46] | Can you get Kristy for me? | 能让克瑞斯蒂接电话吗 |
| [1:01:50] | No, I cannot. Where are you? | 不行 你在哪 |
| [1:01:54] | I’m in jail. | 我在监狱里 |
| [1:01:58] | – What a shock. – Mom, is that Dan? | -真令人震惊 -妈妈 是丹吗 |
| [1:02:11] | Fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:02:14] | – Hey. – Dude, how did it go? | -嘿 -伙计 怎么样 |
| [1:02:16] | – Everything good? – Of course. | -一切顺利吗 -当然了 |
| [1:02:17] | – What did you think was gonna happen? – What do I think? | -你觉得会发生什么 -我觉得 |
| [1:02:20] | Get away! Mommy! No! | 滚开 妈妈 不要 |
| [1:02:22] | Get away! No! Mommy! | 滚开 不要 妈妈 |
| [1:02:31] | That’s ridiculous. I already have all those toys. | 太荒谬了 那些玩具我已经有了 |
| [1:02:35] | Hey, Jack. | 你好 杰克 |
| [1:02:39] | Where’s my 200 bucks? | 我的200块哪去了 |
| [1:02:41] | Oh, you mean my 200 bucks? | 你是说我的200块吗 |
| [1:02:44] | Yeah, she’s good. | 对 她很棒 |
| [1:02:46] | Nice, well played. | 很好 玩得不错嘛 |
| [1:02:50] | You can have this. | 这个给你 |
| [1:02:57] | Thanks, Jack. | 谢谢你 杰克 |
| [1:03:00] | Hey, you know what? | 你知道吗 |
| [1:03:03] | I want you to have this. | 我想把这个给你 |
| [1:03:06] | A G.I. Bob keychain. | 一个特种部队的钥匙扣 |
| [1:03:08] | Bob was the commander for the soldiers that went to battle. | 鲍勃是那些士兵的指挥官 |
| [1:03:11] | He was my favorite when I was your age. | 像你这么大的时候 他是我的最爱 |
| [1:03:14] | You gotta promise me one thing, though. | 不过 你要向我保证一件事 |
| [1:03:16] | You take care of all your soldiers just like Bob. | 你要像鲍勃那样照顾所有的士兵 |
| [1:03:18] | – Especially your mom. – I promise. | -特别是你妈妈 -我保证 |
| [1:03:22] | All right. | 真乖 |
| [1:03:23] | – I’ll call you when I get home. – Okay. | -我到家了给你电话 -好的 |
| [1:03:27] | Keep working on your ambushes, buddy. | 继续打造你的埋伏阵型吧 伙计 |
| [1:03:29] | Bye, Drew. | 再见 德鲁 |
| [1:03:31] | Did you just give your Bob keychain to a whore baby? | 你把鲍勃钥匙扣给了一个妓女的孩子 |
| [1:03:34] | She’s not a whore. | 她不是妓女 |
| [1:03:38] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [1:03:43] | Here you go, man. I got you one of these suckers. | 拿着 兄弟 我给你拿了点吃的 |
| [1:03:48] | Where’s Dan? | 丹哪去了 |
| [1:04:02] | Holy shit. | 我的妈呀 |
| [1:04:06] | Jesus Christ, man. What the fuck happened to you? | 我的天 伙计 你出什么事了 |
| [1:04:14] | Let’s fucking go. | 快走吧 |
| [1:04:16] | Dude, you are not gonna believe what happened to me. | 伙计 你肯定不会相信我遇到了什么 |
| [1:04:19] | You know the feeling you get | 你知道那种感觉吗 |
| [1:04:21] | when you’re looking for that somone… | 就是你一直寻找着她 |
| [1:04:22] | …and you are trying so hard | 努力地寻找 |
| [1:04:24] | you think you might never find her? | 就像永远都找不可能找她了 |
| [1:04:26] | And then, just as you’re about to give up… | 然后 就在你快要放弃的时候 |
| [1:04:29] | …the clouds part, the path widens, and there she is. | 乌云散去 柳暗花明 她出现了 |
| [1:04:34] | Gentlemen, last night I reached the mountaintop. | 先生们 昨晚我达到了巅峰 |
| [1:04:39] | Drew, you had just left the bar when I saw her. | 德鲁 我看到她时你刚刚离开酒吧 |
| [1:04:43] | My midget princess. | 我的侏儒公主 |
| [1:04:45] | Her dark hair and sparkling eyes | 她的黑发与电眼 |
| [1:04:47] | reminded me of Alyssa Milano. | 让我想起了艾莉莎・米兰�Z |
| [1:04:50] | Her compressed cervical vertebrae and bowed legs… | 她短小的脊椎骨和弓形腿 |
| [1:04:53] | …told me exactly what Alyssa Milano would look like… | 完全是艾莉莎・米兰�Z放进台钳里 |
| [1:04:56] | …if she were placed in a vise and squished to one-quarter size. | 被压缩到四分之一之后的样子 |
| [1:04:59] | So as her pigeon-toed feet carried her past our table… | 所以当她的内八字脚经过我我们时 |
| [1:05:03] | …I slid down in my chair, | 我把坐姿调矮了一些 |
| [1:05:05] | hoping to catch her eye. | 希望能捕捉到她的目光 |
| [1:05:07] | She looked at me. | 她看我了 |
| [1:05:09] | Her mashed-up teeth… | 她撩人的牙齿 |
| [1:05:11] | …sparkling in the oily light of the novelty condom machine. | 在新型售套机的映衬下闪着光 |
| [1:05:16] | I gave her my unmistakable | 我给了她一个清楚无误的 |
| [1:05:19] | I-want-to-fuck-you eyes. | 我想上你的眼神 |
| [1:05:22] | She shot back a quick my-spine-hurts face, | 她给我回了一个我脊椎痛的表情 |
| [1:05:27] | and I was smitten. | 我被迷住了 |
| [1:05:29] | She went to the bar, ordered a drink. | 她去了吧台 点了杯饮料 |
| [1:05:31] | I took the stool next to hers. | 我坐到她旁边的凳子上 |
| [1:05:33] | Hey, I’m Gulliver. How are you doing? | 我是格里夫 你好 |
| [1:05:35] | The beer bottle looked massive in her tiny little hands. | 啤酒瓶在她的小手里显得格外沉重 |
| [1:05:39] | All I could think about was | 我满脑子都想着 |
| [1:05:40] | how big those hands would make my penis look. | 那双手能把我的小弟弟弄多大 |
| [1:05:42] | She ate it up. | 她把瓶口全吞进去了 |
| [1:05:44] | I’m not a dwarf, I’m a little person. | 我不是侏儒 我只是身材矮小 |
| [1:05:46] | Is that what doc told you, grumpy? | 是医生这么跟你说的吗 小坏蛋 |
| [1:05:48] | She laughed her tiny little laugh at my tiny little jokes… | 对于我的小玩笑 她笑了一小下 |
| [1:05:52] | …and then threw me a fastball down the middle. | 然后她给了我一个明确的信号 |
| [1:05:54] | So, what do you want to do? | 那么 你想干什么 |
| [1:05:57] | It was the tiny little opening I needed. | 那正是我需要的小开场白 |
| [1:06:00] | I wanna make a mess in your mouth. | 我想在你的嘴巴里乱搞一通 |
| [1:06:03] | – Let’s go to my place, then. – Okay. | -那去我房间吧 -好的 |
| [1:06:06] | Just to be safe, leave the pickax here. | 安全起见 把锄头留在这里吧 |
| [1:06:08] | I don’t want you tunneling under the bed, | 我可不希望你钻到床下 |
| [1:06:10] | looking for diamonds. It’ll freak me out. | 找钻石什么的 那会把我吓坏的 |
| [1:06:12] | Without a tiny little second thought, | 没有一丝的思索 |
| [1:06:14] | she swung down from the stool… | 她滑下凳子 |
| [1:06:16] | …took my pinky in her sausage fingers | 用她香肠般的指头抓住了我的小指 |
| [1:06:18] | and guided me out the door. | 带我走出了门 |
| [1:06:23] | Wait. | 等等 |
| [1:06:24] | You mean to tell me that I have this and this… | 你是想告诉我 我受了这么多伤 |
| [1:06:28] | …because you wanted to fuck an Oompa Loompa, | 就因为你想操一个侏儒吗 |
| [1:06:31] | are you serious? | 没开玩笑吧 |
| [1:06:31] | Dude, it was destiny. | 伙计 这就是命运 |
| [1:06:35] | You remember? | 你记得吗 |
| [1:06:36] | The midget stripper | 那个侏儒脱衣舞女 |
| [1:06:38] | the professor was talking about in class yesterday. | 就是昨天教授上课说的那个 |
| [1:06:40] | I went on Westlaw… | 在去接德鲁之前 |
| [1:06:41] | …and found out where she worked before I picked up Drew. | 我在西部法律数据库找到了她的工作地点 |
| [1:06:47] | You’ve never been to that strip club before? | 你以前没去过那家脱衣舞夜总会吗 |
| [1:06:51] | No. I mean, not until last time. | 没有 我是说 这次才去的 |
| [1:06:54] | Holy shit. | 真该死 |
| [1:06:58] | That’s why you took us to that crappy bar. | 因为这个你就带我们去了那个垃圾酒吧 |
| [1:07:03] | That’s why you had me call information | 正是因为这个你才让我打电话 |
| [1:07:05] | to find out where the club was. | 问夜总会的地址 |
| [1:07:06] | Yes. | 没错 |
| [1:07:07] | The bachelor party was just a fucking ruse? | 告别单身派对只是个幌子对吗 |
| [1:07:09] | Dan, Dan, Dan. | 丹 |
| [1:07:10] | How many people do you know who have fucked a midget? | 你认识的人里有几个上过侏儒啊 |
| [1:07:14] | – You don’t think that’s awesome? – Are you fucking kidding me? | -你不觉得那很棒吗 -你开什么玩笑 |
| [1:07:19] | Here you go. Keep it down? Watch your language. | 请慢用 请小声点 注意用词 |
| [1:07:24] | I might not have a fiancee | 我也许要失去我的未婚妻了 |
| [1:07:25] | anymore because you dragged me into a lie… | 就因为你把我扯进了 |
| [1:07:28] | …that I didn’t want or fucking need to be a part of. | 这个我根本就不想也没必要参与的谎言 |
| [1:07:32] | Now I have to go back to Richmond | 现在我只想回到里士满 |
| [1:07:34] | and beg her for her forgiveness… | 乞求她的原谅 |
| [1:07:36] | …and plead with her not to cancel the wedding… | 恳求她不要取消 |
| [1:07:38] | …that we have been planning for two fucking years, Tucker. | 我们已经计划了他妈两年的婚礼 塔克 |
| [1:07:41] | Two fucking years. | 整整他妈两年啊 |
| [1:07:48] | I– | 我 |
| [1:07:49] | And what am I gonna do when I get there, huh? | 我回去之后该怎么说 |
| [1:07:53] | Look at my fucking face, man. | 看看我这张脸吧 伙计 |
| [1:07:56] | I look like I’ve been on the wrong end of a prison beating | 我看起来就像参与了一场监狱斗殴 |
| [1:07:59] | because I fucking have. | 因为事实正是如此 |
| [1:08:04] | Dude. | 伙计 |
| [1:08:07] | Let me finish my story. It’s not always about you. | 让我讲完我的故事 不只你有故事 |
| [1:08:14] | – Dan, Dan, Dan! – About me? | -丹 丹 丹 -我有故事 |
| [1:08:16] | – Come on, come on. – Oh, my god. | -别这样 别这样 -哦天 |
| [1:08:19] | – Jesus. – Get off of me! | -上帝啊 -放开我 |
| [1:08:21] | – Dude. It was a midget. – Hey, hey, hey! | -兄弟 那可是侏儒啊 -喂 喂 |
| [1:08:23] | Right now, if I were Tucker, I would shut the fuck up. | 现在 如果我是塔克 我就会他妈的闭嘴 |
| [1:09:30] | – I will tell you one thing. – I don’t wanna hear it, mom. | -我想告诉你一件事 -我不想听 妈妈 |
| [1:09:33] | I don’t wanna hear it. | 我不想听 |
| [1:09:38] | No good baptist would be caught dead drinking to excess… | 没有哪个好基督徒会大量酗酒 |
| [1:09:42] | …or getting arrested for causing a ruckus. | 或者因引起骚乱而被捕 |
| [1:09:45] | Of course not, good baptists don’t get caught. | 当然了 好的基督徒是不会被逮到的 |
| [1:09:48] | That’s right. | 没错 |
| [1:09:49] | They just sit in judgment of others… | 他们只是干坐着评判别人 |
| [1:09:51] | …refusing to help them when they need it the most. | 拒绝在别人最需要帮助的时候伸出援手 |
| [1:09:56] | Don’t you get smart with me, young lady. | 不要跟我玩小聪明 年轻人 |
| [1:09:58] | It is not my fault that you decided to fall in love with some… | 你决定和某人相爱不是我的错 |
| [1:10:06] | – Fair-weather protestant. – Oh, my god. | -和一个无法共患难的清教徒 -我的天 |
| [1:10:08] | Ordaining women. | 女人可以当牧师 |
| [1:10:10] | – And marrying the homosexuals. – Mother! | -还允许同性恋结婚 -妈妈 |
| [1:10:12] | Well, it’s true. | 这是事实 |
| [1:10:14] | A religion with all of the | 一个没有原罪但 |
| [1:10:16] | spirituality and none of the guilt? Ha-ha-ha. | 但其他精神内涵都有的宗教 |
| [1:10:20] | Oh, please. | 得了吧 |
| [1:10:22] | It’s not right. | 这样可不对 |
| [1:10:25] | Well, now, look who the lord has chosen to | 现在 来看看这位选择回到 |
| [1:10:28] | deliver unto this happy home. | 这个温暖的家的阁下 |
| [1:10:30] | We need to talk. | 我们得谈谈 |
| [1:10:32] | Good gracious, Daniel, your face. | 天哪 丹 你的脸 |
| [1:10:34] | What happened to you? | 你出什么事了 |
| [1:10:36] | – Babe, I’m sorry. – Sorry? | -宝贝 我很抱歉 -抱歉 |
| [1:10:40] | The wedding is ruined. Look at your face! | 婚礼全毁了 看看你的脸 |
| [1:10:43] | Enough, mom. | 够了 妈妈 |
| [1:10:46] | Oh, my– well, we have to postpone it. | 天哪 我们得推迟婚礼 |
| [1:10:48] | I cannot display your wedding photos in my house. | 我不能在家里挂这样的婚礼照片 |
| [1:10:51] | What will people think? | 别人会怎么想 |
| [1:10:53] | This isn’t about you and your baloney. | 你说的这些都是胡扯 |
| [1:10:58] | Honey, are you okay? | 宝贝 你还好吗 |
| [1:11:02] | Babe. | 宝贝 |
| [1:11:03] | God, you just gotta stop letting Tucker | 上帝啊 别再让塔克 |
| [1:11:06] | get you into these messes. | 别再把你扯进这些破事里了 |
| [1:11:07] | Look, I get it. | 我知道了 |
| [1:11:10] | Are you okay? | 你没事吧 |
| [1:11:12] | I’m fine. | 还好 |
| [1:11:18] | You better stop laughing. | 你还是别笑了 |
| [1:11:20] | – You don’t look fine. – Shut up. | -你看起来不太好 -别说了 |
| [1:11:23] | Baby. | 宝贝 |
| [1:11:25] | Gross. We have to go. | 脏死了 我们走 |
| [1:11:28] | – I’ll work you over like I did these guys. – Oh, yeah? | -我会像对那些伙计一样毒打你的 -是吗 |
| [1:11:31] | I killed them. | 我把他们都杀了 |
| [1:11:35] | – Dude, what’s good for positive thinking? – Penance. | -伙计 往好处想我该怎么办 -去忏悔 |
| [1:11:39] | Exercise is supposed to be good, let’s play some hoops. | 运动应该不错 我们打篮球吧 |
| [1:11:42] | We have class. | 我们有课的 |
| [1:11:43] | That place we pay 35 grand a year | 那个我们每年交三万五 |
| [1:11:45] | to attend between happy hours. | 却只在娱乐之余才会去的地方 |
| [1:11:46] | Eh, that place is dumb. | 那地方是很无趣 |
| [1:11:48] | Have you talked to Dan? | 你跟丹谈过了吗 |
| [1:11:50] | I tried calling him a bunch of times, but he didn’t pick up. | 我给他打过很多次电话 但他不接 |
| [1:11:53] | What? He’s not actually pissed, is he? | 不是吧 他不是真生气吧 |
| [1:11:56] | Has your id-driven narcissism completely stripped you… | 本我趋使下的自我陶醉让你完全失去了 |
| [1:11:59] | …of the ability to evaluate the consequences of your actions? | 评价自己行为后果的能力了吗 |
| [1:12:02] | Dude, this is not that big of a deal. | 伙计 这又不是什么大事 |
| [1:12:03] | Are you drunk? | 你喝醉了吗 |
| [1:12:04] | How have you gotten this far in life | 你连这都不知道 |
| [1:12:06] | without understanding this stuff? | 之前的日子都是怎么过的 |
| [1:12:08] | I’ll apologize to him tomorrow when we get to the hotel. | 明天我们到宾馆的时候我会道歉的 |
| [1:12:11] | That way we can be done with all this bullshit. | 那样我们就算两清了 |
| [1:12:15] | God truly does protect children and fools, | 上帝确实是袒护儿童和傻瓜啊 |
| [1:12:17] | because you are both, Tucker. | 因为你两个都是 塔克 |
| [1:12:19] | That guy on the left, he’s a vegan. | 左边的那个 他是素食主义者 |
| [1:12:21] | – Really? – Look at those abs, Jesus. | -真的吗 -看看他的腹肌 天哪 |
| [1:12:24] | No meat, just abs. | 没有脂肪 全是腹肌 |
| [1:12:27] | Oh, this sounds good. Kick his ass. | 听起来不错 狠狠打他 |
| [1:12:30] | I’m so tired. | 我好累啊 |
| [1:12:33] | Yay. | 好耶 |
| [1:12:39] | It’s Tucker. You wanna talk to him? | 是塔克 你想跟他说话吗 |
| [1:12:47] | Hey, is Dan here? | 你好 丹在吗 |
| [1:12:54] | Yo, dude. | 伙计 |
| [1:12:56] | Can I come in? Talk? | 我能进来吗 谈谈 |
| [1:13:00] | I’m coming in. | 那我进来了 |
| [1:13:02] | Yo, Dan. Dude. | 丹 哥们 |
| [1:13:07] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [1:13:22] | Whatever. | 无所谓了 |
| [1:13:34] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [1:13:37] | All right, what should I do? | 好吧 我该怎么做 |
| [1:13:39] | – Apologize sincerely. – I just did. | -诚恳地道歉 -我道过歉了 |
| [1:13:42] | Tucker, what kind of fantasy world do you live in? | 塔克 你到底活在怎样的奇欢世界里 |
| [1:13:45] | One word and a guy head nod isn’t a sincere apology. | 一句话外加点头并不是诚恳的道歉 |
| [1:13:47] | What am I supposed to say? I’m not a mind reader. | 那我该说什么 我又不会读心术 |
| [1:13:50] | Do you understand the magnitude of the situation? | 你知道现在形势有多严重吗 |
| [1:13:53] | He lied to me for you. | 他为了你而对我撒谎 |
| [1:13:55] | He landed in jail because | 他进监狱也是因为 |
| [1:13:56] | you failed as a friend in every way possible. | 你根本没做到一个朋友应该做的 |
| [1:13:58] | I didn’t make him lie to you. | 我没让他对你撒谎 |
| [1:14:00] | He lied because he’s your friend, Tucker. | 他撒谎是因为你是他的朋友 塔克 |
| [1:14:02] | – To protect you. – That’s stupid, protect me from what? | -是为了保护你 -太蠢了 保护我什么 |
| [1:14:05] | From his future wife thinking | 为了不让他未来的妻子 |
| [1:14:06] | his best friend is a selfish, lying son of a bitch. | 觉得他最好的朋友是个自私 撒谎的混蛋 |
| [1:14:10] | Except for you know what? It’s even worse than that. | 你知道吗 事实比那更严重 |
| [1:14:12] | Because I always knew you were selfish. | 因为我一直都知道你很自私 |
| [1:14:15] | Now I worry that you’re this destructive force… | 现在我开始担心你是一个恶魔 |
| [1:14:17] | …that I can’t trust to protect the man I love. | 而我无法保护我的爱人不受你的伤害 |
| [1:14:20] | It was a bachelor party. | 那只是一个单身告别派对 |
| [1:14:22] | Tucker, look at me. | 塔克 看着我 |
| [1:14:24] | You don’t understand. | 你根本就不明白 |
| [1:14:26] | Part of friendship is knowing boundaries. | 友谊也是有底线的 |
| [1:14:28] | Do you know what Dan’s are? | 你知道丹的底线是什么吗 |
| [1:14:30] | – Yeah, of course. – You do? | -当然知道 -你知道吗 |
| [1:14:32] | Yeah. | 知道 |
| [1:14:33] | What? So you just ignored them? | 然后呢 那你就直接无视它们了吗 |
| [1:14:35] | Pushed right past them? | 直接推开它们 |
| [1:14:36] | He sacrificed his line in the sand for you… | 他为了你不顾自己的原则 |
| [1:14:39] | …and you couldn’t sacrifice a midget vagina for him. | 而你却不能为他放弃一个侏儒的阴道 |
| [1:14:44] | And you wonder why you’re not welcome at our wedding. | 现在你明白我们的婚礼为什么不欢迎你了 |
| [1:14:52] | I’m not invited? | 你们没邀请我吗 |
| [1:14:55] | No, Tucker, you’re not. | 没有 塔克 我们没有 |
| [1:15:02] | There’s no way. What does Dan say? | 不可能 丹怎么说的 |
| [1:15:05] | You don’t get it. I don’t care if you’re at our wedding. | 你没听懂 你是否参加婚礼我并不介意 |
| [1:15:10] | It’s Dan who doesn’t want you there. | 是丹不希望见到你 |
| [1:15:22] | Fuck it. | 去他妈的 |
| [1:15:34] | It’s Tucker. | 是塔克 |
| [1:15:37] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [1:15:40] | – What’s up? – What are you doing, man? | -什么事 -你在干什么 伙计 |
| [1:15:42] | Nothing. Lara’s here. | 没什么 劳拉在这儿 |
| [1:15:44] | Oh, cool, let’s all hang out. | 不错 我们一起聚聚吧 |
| [1:15:47] | Get some drinks. We can take the stripper dancing. | 喝点东西 叫个脱衣舞女来跳舞 |
| [1:15:50] | Yeah, no thanks. We’re just gonna stay in tonight. | 不 谢谢了 我们今晚打算待在屋里 |
| [1:15:52] | We got a long day tomorrow. | 明天有很多事要忙呢 |
| [1:15:54] | Getting pussy doesn’t mean you need to be a pussy. | 有了女人并不是说你就变成了女人 |
| [1:15:56] | Let’s all hang out. | 我们一起去玩吧 |
| [1:15:58] | Yes, Tucker. | 好吧 塔克 |
| [1:15:59] | Insult us and insistently reassert your initial demand. | 侮辱我们并急切地重复你的原始欲望 |
| [1:16:02] | – That will make the difference. – What are you talking about? | -那就不一样了 -你在说什么 |
| [1:16:05] | You already submarined one relationship this week. | 你这周已经失去一个好朋友了 |
| [1:16:08] | I’d like a chance to see if | 在你毁掉我们的关系前 |
| [1:16:09] | mine can float before you torpedo it, all right? | 看看我是否还能撑下去 好吗 |
| [1:16:12] | I gotta go. | 我得挂了 |
| [1:16:29] | Fuck them if they can’t take a joke. | 去他妈的连个玩笑都开不起 |
| [1:16:32] | I have two cats. A girl and a boy. | 我有两只猫 一只公的一只母的 |
| [1:16:35] | Abigail Lulu Dibiase and Jersey Lemon Dibiase. | 阿比盖尔・露露・戴比斯和泽西・雷门・戴比斯 |
| [1:16:39] | Why do you own cats? | 你为什么养猫 |
| [1:16:42] | Do you enjoy having big boxes of shit | 你喜欢你的房子周围 |
| [1:16:43] | all around your house? | 全是装着屎的垃圾盒吗 |
| [1:16:45] | – I clean the litter boxes every day. – Wow, god. | -我每天都都清理垃圾盒的 -天啊 |
| [1:16:49] | Does it not bother you how haughty they are? | 它们那么傲慢你不会烦吗 |
| [1:16:51] | They couldn’t give a fuck about you | 它们毫不关心你 |
| [1:16:52] | Not my cats. | 我的猫不会 |
| [1:16:54] | They’re not like regular cats, they’re like dogs. | 它们不是普通的猫 他们就像狗 |
| [1:16:58] | Now, see, that is right on cue. Every cat person says that. | 你看 这话给人暗示 每个养猫的都这么说 |
| [1:17:01] | Now, you know what’s not like a regular cat? | 你知道什么样猫才不普通吗 |
| [1:17:08] | A fucking dog. | 一只狗 |
| [1:17:13] | There’s no need to thank me. | 不用谢我了 |
| [1:17:19] | The silent, awed adoration is its own reward. | 静静地 敬畏地崇拜就是对它的奖赏 |
| [1:17:33] | What you doing? | 你在做什么 |
| [1:17:37] | I’m talking to the turtles. | 我正在跟海龟聊天 |
| [1:17:45] | Are they telling you to kill that fat girl behind us? | 它们是让你去杀了我身后的肥婆吗 |
| [1:17:49] | Because that’s what they’re telling me to do. | 它们是这样告诉我的 |
| [1:17:56] | What? How can you be mad about that? | 怎么了 你在生什么气呢 |
| [1:17:58] | Fat girls aren’t real people. | 胖女孩不算是人 |
| [1:17:59] | How can a man say something like that? | 一个男人怎么能这么说话 |
| [1:18:03] | Well, usually I don’t say it. Usually it’s my friend Drew. | 我通常不会说 平时都是我朋友德鲁说 |
| [1:18:06] | And then I come in, | 然后我来到这 |
| [1:18:07] | Pick up the girl on the rebound. But he’s not here. | 在伤心之时泡个妞儿 但他却不在 |
| [1:18:11] | So you’re drinking alone? | 所以你在自己喝酒吗 |
| [1:18:13] | That’s one of the beginning stages of alcoholism, you know. | 这是酒精中毒的前兆 |
| [1:18:17] | Oh, I am way past the beginning stages. | 我早就过了初级阶段了 |
| [1:18:19] | I already hide liquor and drink alone in the dark. | 我已经习惯藏好烈酒并在黑暗中独饮了 |
| [1:18:22] | – That’s sad. – No, it isn’t. | -这太可悲了 -不 一点也不 |
| [1:18:25] | Think about it. Drinking is highly underrated. | 想想吧 你太小看喝酒了 |
| [1:18:27] | What are the detriments to drinking? | 喝酒有什么损害 |
| [1:18:29] | – I don’t know. – You don’t know. | -我不知道 -你不知道 |
| [1:18:31] | Okay, how about it hurts relationships with family and friends? | 好吧 它会伤害你和家庭朋友的关系吗 |
| [1:18:34] | I don’t like my family | 我不喜欢我的家人 |
| [1:18:35] | and my friends drink as much as me. | 而我的朋友和我一样喝很多酒 |
| [1:18:37] | How about it causes long-term health problems? | 长期喝酒会引起健康问题吗 |
| [1:18:39] | I drive way too fast to worry about anything long-term. | 我没担当心长期的问题 |
| [1:18:42] | Now, it costs money. I’ll give you that. | 我还会说它很费钱 |
| [1:18:44] | But I’m gonna spend my money recklessly anyway. | 但是反正我也会毫无顾忌的花钱 |
| [1:18:47] | Better on alcohol | 花在酒精上 |
| [1:18:48] | than on drugs or pornography. | 总比起花在毒品或黄色杂志上强多了 |
| [1:18:50] | How about it causes rude and aberrant behavior? | 喝酒会引起粗鲁的异常举动吗 |
| [1:18:53] | I’m an asshole when I’m sober, drinking actually calms me down. | 当我清醒时我是个混蛋 喝酒让我冷静下来 |
| [1:18:56] | Now, think about its benefits. | 现在想想它的好处 |
| [1:18:58] | Makes me invulnerable to criticism. | 让我面对指责刀枪不入 |
| [1:19:00] | Makes ugly people attractive, boring people interesting. | 让丑陋的人有吸引力 无趣的人有趣起来 |
| [1:19:03] | It makes hot girls like me. | 它让性感的姑娘们喜欢上我 |
| [1:19:04] | For my money, the choice is obvious. | 对我的钱来说 选它显而易见 |
| [1:19:06] | Motherfucker! | 混蛋 |
| [1:19:07] | Oh, Mongo got angry! Mongo smash! | 蒙戈生气了 蒙戈发飙了 |
| [1:19:10] | You just totally blew your chance, you know. | 你彻底没有机会了 知道吗 |
| [1:19:12] | There you were standing by yourself… | 刚才你独自一人傻站着 |
| [1:19:14] | when two hot girls decided to talk to you. | 现在两个性感女孩决定跟你说话了 |
| [1:19:18] | – What hot girls? – Us! | -什么性感女孩 -我们 |
| [1:19:21] | That was gonna be my question too. What hot girls? | 那也会是我想问的 什么性感女孩 |
| [1:19:23] | God bless your overworked heart. | 上帝保佑你那颗过劳的心 |
| [1:19:25] | Oh, another fat-girl joke. | 又一个胖妞儿的玩笑 |
| [1:19:27] | That really cuts deep. | 真的很伤人 |
| [1:19:30] | The only way that I could cut | 唯一能伤到你的办法 |
| [1:19:31] | you deep is with a battleaxe and a running start. | 就是拿一把战斧还需要一段助跑 |
| [1:19:35] | Yo, yo, did you hear that chick? | 你听到那小妞儿说什么了吗 |
| [1:19:37] | You ever seen wedding crashers? | 你见过婚礼的不速之客吗 |
| [1:19:39] | They look like they’re a 10 when they’re standing there. | 她们以为自己是仙女下凡呢 |
| [1:19:42] | What do you mean? You can count that high? | 你什么意思 你要求那么高吗 |
| [1:19:44] | Skinny, fat one, zero? | 瘦干儿 胖墩儿 什么也不是 |
| [1:19:46] | – Let’s go. – What a dickhead. | -我们走吧 -真是个蠢货 |
| [1:19:48] | Nice striped shirt, Luigi. | 条纹上衣很好看 路易基 |
| [1:19:52] | Hey, Olive Oyl, | 听着奥莉薇 |
| [1:19:53] | I can’t believe you picked Bluto over Popeye. | 真不敢相信你选了布鲁托没选大力水手 |
| [1:19:56] | That’s fucked up. | 你犯了大错 |
| [1:19:57] | At least I’m not at the bar drinking by myself. | 至少我没有在酒吧一个人喝闷酒 |
| [1:20:06] | Fuck you, fatty. | 去你妈的 死肥婆 |
| [1:20:14] | I wanted to go the party, but he didn’t call. | 我想要去参加派对 但是他没来电话 |
| [1:20:24] | Hey, how’s it going? | 你好 |
| [1:20:34] | – This is beautiful, this ring is beautiful. – Thanks. | -真漂亮 戒指真漂亮 -谢谢 |
| [1:20:37] | You married | 你是真的结婚了 |
| [1:20:38] | or do you wear that to keep the douche bags away? | 还是只是为了让那些蠢货远离你呢 |
| [1:20:40] | No, I’m actually married. | 我真的结婚了 |
| [1:20:42] | Then how good is your marriage? | 那么你的婚姻有多幸福 |
| [1:20:45] | Good enough to keep me in it. | 幸福到可以让我维持下去 |
| [1:20:47] | – Then what are you doing here? – Girls’ night out. | -那你在这儿干嘛 -女孩之夜 |
| [1:20:52] | Come on, isn’t that just code for | 得了吧 这不就是在说 |
| [1:20:55] | “Hey, let’s get drunk and suck off hot guys in the bathroom? “ | 让我们喝醉后在厕所勾引帅哥吗 |
| [1:20:59] | Maybe for the girls you hang out with. | 也许跟你约会的女孩是这样的 |
| [1:21:01] | Are you calling my mom a slut? | 你是在说我的妈妈是个妓女吗 |
| [1:21:07] | Does she know you talk like that? | 她知道你这样说她吗 |
| [1:21:09] | Does your husband know you flirt with men you meet in bars? | 你丈夫知道你在酒吧里跟别人调情吗 |
| [1:21:21] | – Does it really fucking matter? – No, it doesn’t. | -这重要吗 -无关紧要 |
| [1:21:24] | You’re not gonna invite me in? | 你不邀请我进去吗 |
| [1:21:29] | – There’s only one toilet. – There’s a sink, isn’t there? | -这只有一个厕所 -还有一个洗手池呢 对吗 |
| [1:21:37] | Do you always hit on women in the bathroom line? | 你总是跟等着上厕所的女人调情吗 |
| [1:21:40] | Nope. | 不是 |
| [1:21:42] | Only hot ones I want to sleep with. | 我只跟可以上床的性感女人调情 |
| [1:21:44] | You think I’m hot? | 你觉得我很性感 |
| [1:21:46] | Baby, you’re so hot, if I were dating you, | 宝贝 你这么性感 如果我跟你幽会 |
| [1:21:48] | I’d never leave the house. | 我都愿意下床 |
| [1:21:50] | I’d never even leave your vaginal area, | 我甚至都不愿离开你的阴道周围 |
| [1:21:53] | unless I was coming on your face. | 除非我要射在你的脸上 |
| [1:21:57] | You are a naughty little boy. | 你真是个淘气的小子 |
| [1:21:59] | What makes you think I’m gonna have sex with you? | 你凭什么认为我会跟你上床 |
| [1:22:02] | Oh, please. | 得了吧 |
| [1:22:03] | I’m gonna hit it so hard… | 我一定会拔枪猛攻 |
| [1:22:05] | whoever pulls me out of you is gonna become king of England. | 谁能把我从你身边拖走 就能当英国国王了 |
| [1:22:29] | – Excuse us. – Hello. | -不好意思 -你们好 |
| [1:22:32] | – You’re next, gertrude. – Shameful. | -下一个就是你 老太婆 -不知羞耻 |
| [1:22:46] | Fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:23:04] | – Are you all right? – Yeah. | -你没事吧 -没事 |
| [1:23:20] | – Ready? – Wait. | -准备好了 -等等 |
| [1:23:24] | What the fuck? | 他妈的怎么了 |
| [1:23:26] | I gotta take a shit. | 我得去上大号 |
| [1:23:27] | No, wait. I gotta go first, okay? | 不 等等 我先去 好吗 |
| [1:23:29] | – What? – Baby, wait. I’ll just be a second. | -什么 -宝贝 等一下 我很快的 |
| [1:23:32] | Oh, fuck. | 他妈的 |
| [1:23:50] | Goddamn. | 该死 |
| [1:23:54] | – What are you doing in there? – Nothing. | -你在里面干什么呢 -没事 |
| [1:23:57] | It doesn’t sound like nothing. Hurry up! | 听起来不像没事 快点 |
| [1:24:01] | I’ll be right out. | 我马上就出来 |
| [1:24:04] | Turn on the fan. | 打开排风扇 |
| [1:24:08] | Light a match or something. | 你的屁都能点着了 |
| [1:24:11] | Oh, fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:24:13] | – I’m sorry. Oh, no. – Some air freshener in around here. | -对不起 不 -这儿有空气清新剂 |
| [1:24:16] | – I’m not feeling so good. – You’re okay. | -我感觉不舒服 -你没事的 |
| [1:24:18] | I should go. | 我得走了 |
| [1:24:19] | – No, no, no, what? – I’m going. | -不 不 不 什么 -我要走了 |
| [1:24:21] | Fuck, what is that smell? Holy shit. | 妈的 什么味儿 去他妈的 |
| [1:24:26] | Fuck! You clogged it. | 妈的 你让马桶堵了 |
| [1:24:29] | You clogged a motherfucking hotel toilet. | 你他妈的把一个旅馆的马桶弄堵了 |
| [1:24:31] | What kind of constipated meth-head | 什么的肠胃才能 |
| [1:24:33] | bowel movement does it take to clog a hotel toilet? | 让旅馆的厕所都堵了啊 |
| [1:24:35] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [1:24:39] | Hello? | 在吗 |
| [1:24:42] | Oh, fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:25:06] | Thank you very much. Bathroom? | 非常感谢 厕所在哪儿 |
| [1:25:08] | – Where’s the bathroom? – In the main lobby. | -厕所在哪儿 -在主大厅 |
| [1:25:10] | Main lobby. | 主大厅 |
| [1:25:13] | What lobby is–? Oh, fuck it. | 大厅在 妈的 |
| [1:25:25] | Fucking shit! Where’s the bathroom? | 他妈的 厕所在哪儿 |
| [1:25:40] | Which way is the fucking…? | 他妈的怎么走 |
| [1:25:57] | Oh, no, no, no. | 不 不 不 |
| [1:25:59] | Fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:26:02] | Fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:26:04] | Oh, fuck, no. | 妈的 不 |
| [1:26:14] | Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. | 妈的 妈的 |
| [1:26:35] | Shit. | 该死 |
| [1:27:20] | Oh, fuck. | 妈的 |
| [1:27:27] | Fuck! | 妈的 |
| [1:28:28] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [1:29:03] | God, I hope they serve beer in hell. | 天啊 我希望在地狱里也有啤酒喝 |
| [1:29:08] | You may kiss the bride. | 你可以吻新娘了 |
| [1:29:18] | And now will you please rise? | 现在请全体起立 |
| [1:29:34] | Yep. | 是的 |
| [1:29:36] | Yeah. Yeah, I know. | 是的 是的 我知道 |
| [1:29:38] | Yep, yep. The biggest one you got. | 是的是的 要最大号的 |
| [1:29:41] | Okay, thank you very much. | 好的 非常感谢 |
| [1:29:45] | Hold it. Hold it. Good. | 不要动 不要动 好的 |
| [1:29:46] | This is good. Okay. Can I get you to move your head a little–? | 非常好 好的 你的头往那边 |
| [1:29:52] | This time, all she could do was talk about her and Dan. | 这一次 她所能谈的只有她和丹 |
| [1:29:55] | They couldn’t stop looking at each other and holding hands. | 他们一直注视着对方 手牵着手 |
| [1:29:58] | After that, I knew he was a keeper. | 在那之后 我就知道他会是她的守护神 |
| [1:30:01] | And I was right. I love you, Kristy. | 我是对的 我爱你克瑞斯蒂 |
| [1:30:18] | Hey, I’m Jeff. I’m Dan’s older brother and his best man. | 我是杰夫 我是丹的哥哥也是他的伴郎 |
| [1:30:22] | Dan and I go way back. | 丹和我关系很好 |
| [1:30:24] | In fact, I kind of feel like I’ve known him in my whole life. | 实际上 我感觉已经认识他一辈子了 |
| [1:30:28] | When Dan told he’d met the girl he was gonna marry… | 当丹告诉我他遇见了想娶的女孩时 |
| [1:30:32] | I didn’t believe it. | 我并不相信 |
| [1:30:33] | Only a few short years ago, he was throwing rocks at girls… | 因为几年前 他还在向女孩儿们扔石头 |
| [1:30:36] | and now he is putting one on her finger. | 而现在他手里却牵着一个女孩 |
| [1:30:40] | Oh, god. | 天啊 |
| [1:30:42] | I have known Kristy for a few years now… | 我认识克瑞斯蒂好几年了 |
| [1:30:45] | and I couldn’t ask for a better sister-in-law. | 我找不到比她更好的弟媳了 |
| [1:30:47] | Here is to my little bro and his bride. | 敬我的弟弟和他的新娘 |
| [1:30:55] | All right, Sling Blade, give me that mike. | 好了 呆子 把麦克风给我 |
| [1:30:58] | Some of you may not know me. | 你们当中有些人可能不认识我 |
| [1:30:59] | My name is Tucker Max. | 我叫塔克・麦克斯 |
| [1:31:01] | Dan’s my best friend. | 丹是我最好的朋友 |
| [1:31:03] | At least he was, until last week | 至少他曾经是 直到上个星期 |
| [1:31:05] | when I took advantage of Dan’s kindness and loyalty. | 我利用了丹的善良和忠诚 |
| [1:31:09] | I forced him into lying to Kristy, | 我迫使他对克瑞斯蒂撒了谎 |
| [1:31:11] | dragged him two hours away… | 拽着他开了两个小时的车 |
| [1:31:12] | got him abusively drunk, | 让他喝得烂醉如泥 |
| [1:31:14] | and then ditched him to sleep with a midget stripper. | 然后丢下他去和侏儒脱衣舞女郎上床 |
| [1:31:16] | I am the reason that, on the most important day of Dan’s life… | 我就是 在丹一生中最重要的一天 |
| [1:31:20] | Dan’s face looks like a melted barbie doll’s. | 让丹愁眉苦脸的原因 |
| [1:31:23] | Just wait. | 再等一下 |
| [1:31:24] | The worst part is, I didn’t know I was doing anything wrong. | 最糟糕的是我不知道我做错了什么 |
| [1:31:27] | I was just doing what I’ve always done, | 我只是做了我通常会做的 |
| [1:31:29] | which is pretty much whatever I want. | 我想做什么就做什么 |
| [1:31:31] | And to be honest, it’s worked out pretty well for me so far. | 坦率的说 到目前为止很适合我 |
| [1:31:35] | Up until about 24 hours ago… | 直到二十四小时之前 |
| [1:31:37] | when my selfishness finally caught up with me… | 当我的自私真的影响到了我 |
| [1:31:40] | And cost me Dan’s | 让我和丹的 |
| [1:31:42] | friendship and my invitation to this wedding. | 友情破灭而让我无法参加这个婚礼 |
| [1:31:45] | Still, I shrugged it off and went out last night anyway. | 而我昨晚仍旧满不在乎地又出去鬼混了 |
| [1:31:50] | I’m not gonna bore you, | 我不想让你们听烦 |
| [1:31:51] | But the long and short of it is, I got drunk… | 总而言之 我喝醉了 |
| [1:31:54] | And ended the night sprinting across the hotel lobby… | 那一晚我在旅馆大厅边冲刺边 |
| [1:31:57] | uncontrollably shitting my pants. | 无法控制地拉在了裤子里 |
| [1:32:02] | Ha-ha. No, really, I crapped all over the lobby. | 不 是真的 我拉满了整个大厅 |
| [1:32:05] | And continuing with my selfish behavior… | 再一次的由于我自私的个性 |
| [1:32:08] | I left my mess, went back | 我丢下一团糟的局面 回到了 |
| [1:32:09] | to my hotel room and acted like nothing happened. | 我的旅馆房间装作什么事也没发生 |
| [1:32:12] | The only thing that kept me | 唯一让我没有 |
| [1:32:14] | from passing out in a pile of my own puke… | 在我自己的呕吐中昏倒的原因是 |
| [1:32:17] | was all the knocking at the door. | 敲门的声音 |
| [1:32:25] | Staring into her angry, overworked face, | 看着她生气的疲惫的脸 |
| [1:32:29] | I had a moment of clarity. | 我一瞬间清醒了 |
| [1:32:34] | Someone else always cleans up my mess. | 总是有人在给我擦屁股 |
| [1:32:38] | And for the past few years, that person has been Dan. | 在过去的那些年中 那个人就是丹 |
| [1:32:42] | At 3 in the morning, down on my knees… | 在凌晨三点钟 我跪在地上 |
| [1:32:47] | literally cleaning up my | 在我整个人生中 |
| [1:32:49] | own shit for the first time in my adult life… | 第一次自己给自己擦屁股 |
| [1:32:53] | I finally understood what an amazing person Dan is… | 我终于明白了丹是多么好的一个人 |
| [1:32:56] | And how lucky I am… | 我有是多么的幸运 |
| [1:33:00] | or was, to call him my friend. | 或者说曾是多么幸运 能把他称为朋友 |
| [1:33:06] | Dan, Kristy. | 丹 克瑞斯蒂 |
| [1:33:14] | When I came to your hotel room last night to say I’m sorry… | 当我昨晚去你们的旅馆房间道歉的时候 |
| [1:33:17] | I honestly didn’t understand what I was apologizing for. | 我真的不明白我为什么要道歉 |
| [1:33:20] | But in the last 24 hours, it’s hit me. | 但是在过去的二十四小时中 我恍然大悟了 |
| [1:33:25] | It’s hit me like 10 pounds of slippery shit. | 就像十磅重的屎砸在了我的脸上 |
| [1:33:33] | I’ve been a terrible friend. | 我是个很糟糕的朋友 |
| [1:33:36] | And even though I probably | 尽管我也许依旧 |
| [1:33:37] | don’t deserve either of you in my life… | 不配成为你们的朋友 |
| [1:33:39] | I had to come down here | 但我必须来这里 |
| [1:33:40] | and tell you that and ask for your forgiveness. | 告诉你们这些并请求你们的原谅 |
| [1:33:43] | And I hope you will accept my sincere apology. | 我希望你们能接受我真诚的道歉 |
| [1:33:48] | Now…. | 现在 |
| [1:33:51] | I know that this is probably | 我知道这可能 |
| [1:33:52] | gonna scare the crap out of most of you… | 吓坏了你们大多数人 |
| [1:33:55] | but I hope to have kids someday. | 但是我希望哪天我也能有孩子 |
| [1:33:59] | And I’m sure that I will only have daughters… | 而且我确信我只会有女儿 |
| [1:34:03] | And they will all be | 而且她们都会成为 |
| [1:34:04] | vicious sluts who sleep with assholes like me… | 跟像我这样的混蛋上床的妓女 |
| [1:34:06] | and throw back it in my face. But such is karma. | 这会给我当头一棒 但这就是我的报应 |
| [1:34:10] | If one is a boy, though… | 如果有一个男孩的话 |
| [1:34:12] | I would consider myself a huge success as a father… | 如果他长大后有丹一半好的话 |
| [1:34:16] | if he grew up to be half the man Dan is right now. | 我就认为自己是一个非常成功的父亲了 |
| [1:34:21] | That’s so sweet. | 太温馨了 |
| [1:34:24] | Strippers. | 脱衣舞女 |
| [1:34:26] | Dan. | 丹 |
| [1:34:33] | I never thanked you… | 我从未感谢过你 |
| [1:34:36] | never acknowledged you… | 从未答谢过你 |
| [1:34:40] | never even really thought about it. | 甚至从来没想过 |
| [1:34:41] | I just took from you, dude. | 我只知道从你那里索取 老兄 |
| [1:34:48] | I’m really sorry. | 我真的非常抱歉 |
| [1:35:09] | So for once, I want to give you something back. | 所以平生第一次 我要给你一些回报 |
| [1:35:12] | – No. – Here we go, follow me. | -不 -跟我来 我们走 |
| [1:35:14] | Let’s go. Get up. | 来吧 起来 |
| [1:35:17] | Wedding’s going outside. | 婚礼要在外面举行了 |
| [1:35:18] | You’re gonna love it. You’re gonna love it. | 你会喜欢的 你会喜欢的 |
| [1:35:23] | You’re gonna love it. | 你们会喜欢的 |
| [1:35:25] | Here we go. Come on, come on. | 这边来 来吧 来吧 |
| [1:35:39] | Yeah. Yeah. | 好的 好的 |
| [1:35:45] | Get it. Go get it. | 快去 去玩吧 |
| [1:36:33] | Oh, yeah. Yeah. | 好的 好的 |
| [1:36:38] | All right, it’s open. | 好了 切好了 |
| [1:36:58] | Three! | 三 |
| [1:37:26] | Tucker, I gotta say, when you came in here, I almost died. | 塔克我得说 当你进来时 我快要吓死了 |
| [1:37:30] | I didn’t know what you were gonna do. | 我不知道你要干什么 |
| [1:37:32] | That speech was really good. | 那段讲话真的非常棒 |
| [1:37:34] | Thank you. You guys deserve it. | 谢谢 你们应得的 |
| [1:37:37] | Yeah, we did. | 是啊 确实 |
| [1:37:40] | Come here. | 过来 |
| [1:37:42] | Congratulations. | 恭喜你 |
| [1:37:44] | – Weddings are gay. – Thank you. | -婚礼总是令人愉快 -谢谢 |
| [1:37:46] | – You’re welcome. – I am going to go check on the guests. | -不用谢 -我得去招待一下客人了 |
| [1:38:02] | Well, I’m gonna go check on Jack. | 我要去看看杰克 |
| [1:38:06] | Bye. | 回见 |
| [1:38:09] | All right, you really fucked a midget? | 好了 你真的上了一个侏儒女吗 |
| [1:38:17] | Oh, yeah. | 是的 |
| [1:38:18] | When she’s riding you, | 当她骑你身上时 |
| [1:38:20] | can you spin her like a top? | 你能让她像陀螺似的旋转吗 |
| [1:38:22] | Dude, I tried, but her vagina’s too shallow. | 哥们 我试了 但是她的阴道太窄了 |
| [1:38:24] | The physics were all wrong. | 医学全错了 |
| [1:38:26] | – Did you really shit the lobby? – Oh, yeah. | -你真的在大厅里拉屎了 -是的 |
| [1:38:29] | Did you really clean it up? | 你真的打扫干净了 |
| [1:38:31] | Well, the janitor did show up with the mop and the bucket. | 既然清洁工都拿着拖把和桶出现了 |
| [1:38:34] | You guys have known me for many years. | 你们认识了我这么多年 |
| [1:38:35] | What do you think Tucker would do? | 你们觉得塔克会怎么做 |
| [1:38:58] | I knew it. You don’t even do your own laundry. | 我就知道 你连自己的衣服都不洗 |
| [1:39:01] | Un-fucking-believable, bro. You didn’t clean it up. | 真他妈的不敢相信 哥们 你居然没打扫 |
| [1:39:04] | You show up at my wedding, | 就出现在我的婚礼上 |
| [1:39:05] | pour out your heart, and it’s all bullshit. | 吐露了你的心声 那些全是在胡说 |
| [1:39:07] | It’s not all bullshit. | 不全是胡说 |
| [1:39:09] | I don’t need to actually clean up the mess to learn the lesson. | 我不用非得清理那一团糟来吸取教训 |
| [1:39:12] | I don’t even know why this shocks me anymore. | 我觉得这个故事一点都不感人 |
| [1:39:15] | Oh, dude. | 哥们 |
| [1:39:22] | I’ll be right back. | 我马上回来 |
| [1:39:26] | Whoa, whoa, whoa, careful. | 哦 哦 小心点 |
| [1:39:30] | Watch your step. | 小心脚下 |
| [1:39:37] | That’s my cousin. | 那是我表妹 |