时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:01] | With liberty and justice for all. | 拥有着自由和正义 |
[00:04] | I am so grateful to be living in this fine country. | 我真是三生有幸生活在这个国度 |
[00:08] | Me too. Thank God for slavery. | 我也是 为奴隶制感谢上帝 |
[00:12] | Don’t mind me. I’m high as shit right now. | 别吃心 我现在嗨起来了 |
[00:14] | Drug test Denzel. | 药品测试Denzel |
[00:16] | Okay, as y’all know, | 好了 正如各位所知 |
[00:17] | this year Brickleberry is proud to host the annual park service ranger ball. | 今年 脆莓将有幸承办林警系统年度舞会 |
[00:22] | Well, I, for one, am looking forward to getting wasted and having anonymous sex | 我个人打算堕落一把 找个人在众目睽睽之下来一发 |
[00:25] | with multiple partners of various races and genders. | 我个人打算堕落一把 找个人在众目睽睽之下来一发 |
[00:29] | Drug test Ethel. | 药品测试Ethel |
[00:31] | I hope I get lucky too. | 希望我也能这么幸运 |
[00:33] | I’m bringing a friend to be my date, so fingers crossed. | 我要带个朋友去约会 祈祷吧 |
[00:36] | By friend, he means hooker, | 朋友的意思是妓女 |
[00:37] | and, by date, he means shallow grave by the rail road. | 约会的意思是在铁路边挖浅坟自缢 |
[00:39] | I’m glad everyone’s gonna have fun. | 真高兴每个人都能找到乐子 |
[00:42] | I’ll probably just spend the whole night by the punch bowl. | 我可能只会在汤碗旁边呆上一晚 |
[00:44] | By myself. | 自己 |
[00:46] | Alone. | 一人 |
[00:48] | Again. | 又一次 |
[00:50] | That’s sweet of you not to spoil our fun. | 你不来打搅我们找乐子真贴心 |
[00:51] | I can’t wait. | 我都等不及了 |
[00:53] | I’ll have my pick of the female rangers. | 我要去挑一个女林警 |
[00:55] | Sometimes I wonder what goes on in that baby elephant head of yours. | 有时我不禁想你大象宝宝个头的脑袋有什么毛病 |
[00:58] | Don’t be jealous, Ethel. | 别嫉妒 Ethel |
[01:00] | Everyone knows I’m the coolest and best-looking Park Ranger around. | 大家都知道我是这里最酷最帅的林警了 |
[01:05] | What? | 咋了? |
[01:06] | Did someone draw a dick on my face again? | 又有人在我脸上画小鸡鸡了? |
[01:20] | She takes out a diaper, right? | 她脱下了纸尿裤 知道吧? |
[01:22] | And I said, “not yet. I ain’t ready for you yet”. | 我就说 不行 我还没准备好呢 |
[01:26] | – He’s right there. – Hi, guys. | – 他来了 – 早 伙计们 |
[01:28] | Listen, about earlier, I’d appreciate it if we could just… | 之前的事 如果你们守口如瓶那我太… |
[01:31] | Steve, if we teased you about something so obviously painful, | Steve 如果因为那么蛋疼的事就嘲笑你 |
[01:34] | what kind of friends would we be? | 我们还算是什么朋友? |
[01:36] | – Thanks, Malloy. I was worried that… – Trick question. | – 谢了 Malloy 我正发愁… – 但有个棘手问题 |
[01:39] | I’m not friends with bald people. | 我可不跟秃子交朋友 |
[01:49] | No! | 不 |
[01:52] | Go ahead. Laugh it up, you heartless bastards. | 继续 笑大声点 一群没良心的混蛋 |
[01:56] | You don’t understand what it’s like to be bald. | 你们根本不懂谢顶的痛苦 |
[01:58] | I’ve been dealing with this problem for most of my adult life. | 我从成年之后就一直承受着这种困扰 |
[02:02] | Cruelly, the day I gained hair in one area… | 很残酷 在我某处长毛的那天 |
[02:11] | I lost it in another. | 别处就开始掉毛了 |
[02:15] | I tried to hide my secret shame, but sooner or later I would always be exposed. | 我努力掩藏这难以启齿的耻辱 但时不时都会被发现 |
[02:24] | Kids, please, allow me. | 孩子们 安静 让我来 |
[02:30] | The cruelest blow came on prom night. | 最残酷的打击在高中舞会那晚 |
[02:33] | Stacy Blanchard agreed to go with me | Stacy Blanchard答应与我同行 |
[02:36] | if I did her homework for the semester. | 只要我帮她做一学期作业 |
[02:38] | Thanks to me, she got to go to high school an extra year. | 多亏有我 她上了一年高四 |
[02:40] | You are so getting laid tonight. | 今晚你可真有型 |
[02:45] | I thought we had a deal. | 我们不是约好了吗? |
[02:47] | Uh yeah, the contract was void | 是说好了 但协议取消 |
[02:49] | because I got an “F” and you look like shit. | 因为我得了F 而且你长了一副屌样 |
[02:54] | Allow me. | 让我来 |
[03:02] | Kids can be so cruel. | 孩子们总是那么残忍 |
[03:04] | So can adults, you bald mother [Bleep]. | 大人也一样 你个秃老亮 |
[03:07] | Oh, Steve, it’s not that bad. | Steve 没有那么糟糕啦 |
[03:08] | You kind of got that Michael Chiklis look. | 你就跟Michael Chiklis似的 |
[03:10] | – Really? – Yeah. | – 真的? – 真的 |
[03:11] | And if he weren’t bald and ugly, that would be a compliment. | 如果他不是又秃又挫 我这就算是夸你了 |
[03:15] | Oh, I got him. | 我把他坑了 |
[03:16] | Oh, he thought I was gonna say something nice. | 他以为我要说什么好话呢 |
[03:18] | Must be hard to process sarcasm with that shitty chrome dome. | 凭这颗秃头很难理解其中的讽刺意味吧 |
[03:23] | Ethel, I understand Woody, Denzel, and Malloy teasing Steve, | Ethel 我能理解Woody Denzel和Malloy拿Steve开涮 |
[03:27] | but you too? | 但你怎么也这样? |
[03:28] | Absolutely. | 当然了 |
[03:30] | I’ve always considered myself to be someone | 我一直是个关心动物胜过于关心人的家伙 |
[03:31] | who cares more about animals than people. | 我一直是个关心动物胜过于关心人的家伙 |
[03:33] | Die, you little bastard. | 去死 你个小混蛋 |
[03:36] | See, this is a perfect example. | 看见了吧 这就是个绝好的例子 |
[03:41] | There you go, little fella. | 走吧 小家伙儿 |
[03:43] | You’re safe now. | 你安全了 |
[03:45] | – What was that? – You just crushed a kitten’s head. | – 什么状况? – 你刚踩爆一只小猫脑袋 |
[03:47] | Oh, no. | 不 |
[03:50] | Oh, no. | 不 |
[03:55] | I always have you, Viggo Mortensen. | 我一直在想着你 Viggo Mortensen |
[03:57] | Even if it’s only in my homoerotic dreams. | 即使在跟你搞基的春梦里 |
[03:59] | Hey, Steve, what are you doing? | 嘿 Steve 你在干嘛? |
[04:01] | Uh, nothing. | 没啥 |
[04:02] | You’re not leaving, are you? | 你不会是要走吧 是不? |
[04:04] | Connie, I spent the last ten years here | Connie 我倾尽十载年华 |
[04:06] | cultivating an image of the coolest guy in the park, | 打造本园中最酷男子的形象 |
[04:08] | an object of desire for women and confused animals. | 激起了女人和晕了头动物们的欲望 |
[04:11] | But now that I’ve been exposed, | 但现在我已经暴露了 |
[04:13] | I need to find some place I can be popular again. | 只能再找个地方 重新受到欢迎 |
[04:16] | That’s why I’m headed to… | 因此我要去… |
[04:20] | Wounded Knee, South Dakota. | 伤膝河 南达科他州 |
[04:22] | Nah. Too cold. | 别了 那太冷了 |
[04:26] | Make that Fishkill, New York? | 选中了Fishkill 去纽约吗? |
[04:28] | Steve, I know how it feels to be unattractive. | Steve 我能理解没吸引力的感觉 |
[04:30] | It can really hurt. | 这确实很痛苦 |
[04:32] | That’s why you need friends to make you feel better. | 这就是为什么你需要朋友来安慰你 |
[04:34] | Hey, you know that ranger ball coming up? | 嘿 你知道马上要开林警舞会了吧? |
[04:37] | We should go together. | 我们可以一起去 |
[04:39] | You know, as friends. | 当然了 作为朋友 |
[04:41] | I’ll even get drunk and give you a tug job. | 我也能在喝多后给你撸一管 |
[04:44] | I’m good, thanks. | 我很好 谢了 |
[04:45] | Steve, you’re a good person. | Steve 你是个好人 |
[04:47] | You just need to make your inside feel as beautiful as you want your outside to be. | 只要把心灵打扮得像你期望的外表一样美就好了 |
[04:51] | So what you’re saying is make my outside beautiful, | 所以你是想说 不管我内心多么龌龊 |
[04:55] | no matter how ugly I am on the inside. | 只要把外表打扮漂亮就好了 |
[04:58] | Well, that’s not really what I was saying. | 其实吧 我不是这个意思 |
[05:00] | – What I was saying… – Great advice, Connie. | – 我想说吧… – 真是个金点子 Connie |
[05:02] | I’d kiss you if you weren’t so goddamn ugly. | 要不是你天杀的丑 我都想亲你一口了 |
[05:09] | Hang in there, little kitty. Almost to the vet. | 挺住啊 小猫咪 就快到兽医那儿了 |
[05:11] | Every life is precious. | 每条生命都弥足珍贵 |
[05:15] | Thank you, Heavenly Father. | 天父在上 亏您开眼 |
[05:16] | Only by your blessed holy spirit and amazing Grace did I… | 唯有您尊贵的圣灵和及时的恩典才让我… |
[05:20] | Ah, Jesus goddamn Christ! | 耶稣他大爷的基督啊 |
[05:24] | Denzel’s government surplus emporium. | Denzel政府盈余设备特卖场 |
[05:26] | What you need? I got water coolers, uniforms, rifles. | 来点啥? 我这儿有饮水机 制服 步枪 |
[05:29] | I even got a waterfall. But you got to come pick that shit up. | 人工瀑布都有呢 但你得自己来提那玩意儿 |
[05:32] | Denzel, it’s Ethel. | Denzel 是Ethel |
[05:33] | You’re not selling off all our stuff again, are you? | 你不会又在卖咱家的公物吧 是不是? |
[05:35] | Hell no. In an unrelated question, | 才不是呢 问个和这无关的事 |
[05:38] | how much do you think I can get for your black teddy? | 你觉得你的黑款连衫衬裤能卖多少钱? |
[05:40] | Denzel, focus. I just hit a deer. | Denzel 别扯了 我刚撞了一头鹿 |
[05:42] | I think it’s gonna die. | 它看上去快不行了 |
[05:44] | You got to put that poor animal out of its misery. | 你得帮那可怜的动物从痛苦中解脱 |
[05:46] | I can’t do that. | 我下不去手 |
[05:47] | It goes against every fiber of my self-righteous being. | 这有悖于我每一根和良知相关的神经 |
[05:49] | Ethel, it’s Malloy. Kill it. | Ethel 我是Malloy 宰了它 |
[05:52] | Do you even know what we’re talking about? | 你知道我们在说什么吗? |
[05:53] | Don’t know, don’t care, just kill it. | 不知道 也不想知道 宰了就是了 |
[05:56] | If the animal’s suffering, trust me, it’s the right thing to do. | 如果那动物在遭罪 相信我 这样做没错的 |
[05:58] | Ain’t no warranty on that! | 那东西可没质保 |
[06:00] | I am so sorry, little doe. | 太对不起了 小鹿儿 |
[06:04] | Why… | 为什么… |
[06:08] | Did I enjoy that so much? | 我会如此享受这过程? |
[06:14] | So, Steve, after two years of taking multiple daily shots in the buttocks, | Steve 如果两年内你能坚持每天接受若干臀部注射 |
[06:19] | you can expect to go from this hairless freak… | 就可以从无毛怪胎摇身一变… |
[06:22] | To this handsome devil. | 成为帅气的情种 |
[06:24] | What is that, like, four more hairs? | 这算啥玩意 就四根毛吗? |
[06:26] | Up to four more hairs. | 是最多四根毛 |
[06:28] | Growitol. | 仅需”生毛灵” |
[06:29] | Ask your doctor if Growitol’s right for you. | 需咨询医生是否对己适用 |
[06:31] | You are my doctor. That’s why I’m here. | 你就是我医生 我就是来找你咨询的 |
[06:33] | Am I? You know, Steve, I always saw you more as a friend. | 是吗? 知道不 Steve 我一直都更把你当朋友 |
[06:36] | Besides, I was banned from practicing medicine years ago. | 顺带说一句 几年前我就被禁止开业行医了 |
[06:41] | I’m not kidding. | 我可没开玩笑 |
[06:42] | Isn’t there anything else you can give me? | 你就没别的东西给我吗? |
[06:44] | Without hair, I’m nobody. | 没有头发 我什么都不是 |
[06:46] | I’m not smart, I’m not as athletic as I look, | 我既不灵光 又不像看起来那么壮 |
[06:48] | my personality is non-existent, yet somehow grating. | 几乎没什么个性 但又不招人喜欢 |
[06:51] | Well, Steve, there is the hair tonic that I use. | 好吧 Steve 这是我用的生发油 |
[06:53] | I purchased it on the Chinese black market. | 是我从中国黑市上买来的 |
[06:55] | Or was it the black Chinese market? | 或者说是黑中国市场? |
[06:57] | Anyway it’s made with tiger sperm. | 反正这东西是拿老虎精液提炼的 |
[06:59] | Now remember, friend, just rub a thimbleful on your scalp once a week… | 记住 朋友 只要每个礼拜往头皮上擦一点… |
[07:03] | Ooh. Not good. | 这可不妙 |
[07:05] | Lucky for you, I’m also a malpractice attorney. | 不过好在我还是个无证律师 |
[07:07] | My card. | 这是我的名片 |
[07:11] | Man, it’s hot all of a sudden. | 天呐 怎么一下热起来了 |
[07:30] | What happened? | 我怎么了? |
[07:32] | Man, I got a wicked hangover. | 天呐 我肯定是喝太高了 |
[07:34] | Oh, God. What have I done? | 老天 我到底怎么了? |
[07:37] | Say your prayers, grizzly bear. | 祈祷吧 大灰熊 |
[07:45] | This is for killing my neighbor’s pig. | 你将为咬死我邻居的猪付出代价 |
[07:47] | That pig beat me in checkers. | 那猪下西洋棋能下赢我 |
[07:49] | They smarter than dogs, you know. | 它们比狗都要聪明 |
[07:50] | No, please don’t shoot. | 不 拜托不要杀我 |
[07:52] | He talk. Hold on, Bobby. That ain’t no bear. | 他能说话 别开枪 Bobby 他可不是熊 |
[07:55] | That right there is Bigfoot. | 这货是大脚怪 |
[07:58] | Bigfoot. Ha. I’m afraid you’re… | 大脚怪? 我想你们搞… |
[08:00] | Holy shit, we’re in the presence of greatness. | 我的老天 我们正站在奇迹的面前 |
[08:04] | Hey, everybody! | 嘿 大伙们 |
[08:05] | It’s Bigfoot, a real-life celebrity. | 他是大脚怪 活生生的名人 |
[08:10] | Your hair is beautiful. It’s so silky. | 你毛发好漂亮 手感就像丝绸 |
[08:12] | Can we get a picture with you? | 能跟你合张影吗? |
[08:13] | Listen, people, I’m flattered by the attention, but… | 听着 大伙们 你们真让我受宠若惊 但… |
[08:16] | Bigfoot, will you sign my gigantic breasts? | 大脚怪 能在我大奶子上签名吗? |
[08:19] | Bigfoot would love to. | 大脚怪乐意为您效劳 |
[08:21] | I know just where I’m gonna put the os. | 刚好我知道该把两个o签在哪 |
[08:23] | The nipples. | 乳头上 |
[08:34] | Hey, has anyone seen my stapler? | 嘿 谁看到我订书机了? |
[08:36] | It’s probably on your desk. | 很可能在你桌子上 |
[08:38] | – Thanks. – Where’s my desk? | – 谢谢 – 我桌子上哪去了? |
[08:40] | Where it always is. By the copy machine. | 在它一直在的地方啊 复印机旁边 |
[08:43] | Where’s the goddamn copy machine? | 复印机又特么跑哪去了? |
[08:45] | It’s right there. Denzel, you see it, don’t you? | 就在那啊 Denzel 你能看到 对不? |
[08:48] | Of course I do. | 当然能啦 |
[08:54] | This isn’t good. | 这可不妙 |
[08:55] | You’re probably having another one of your episodes. | 目测你马上会迎来新一轮抓狂期 |
[09:02] | – Did you just kill a fly? – Huh. I guess I did. | – 你刚是不是拍死一只苍蝇? – 我想是的 |
[09:04] | – That’s not like you at all, Ethel. – Ah, it’s no big deal. It’s just a fly. | – 这可一点都不像你 Ethel – 没什么大不了啦 一只苍蝇而已 |
[09:08] | My old “savior to the animals” stance may have been a little extreme. | 我之前”动物救星”的立场似乎有点太极端了 |
[09:12] | Well, I’m glad to hear you’ve come to your senses. | 好吧 你能想明白我还是蛮高兴的 |
[09:13] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[09:14] | Oh, look at you. You’re still alive. | 瞧瞧你 居然还活着 |
[09:22] | This bitch is crazy. | 这娘们儿魔怔了 |
[09:29] | Okay, I only have time for several hundred more final questions, everybody. | 好吧 我只有回答你们最后几百个问题的时间 各位 |
[09:33] | Hello, Bigfoot, Timmy from Timmy’s YouTube channel. | 你好 大脚怪 我是《Timmy油管直播间》的Timmy |
[09:36] | Why now, after centuries of hiding, have you chosen to go public? | 为什么在数世纪躲藏之后 你选择在公众跟前露面? |
[09:39] | Because, Timmy, I wanted to be famous. | 因为 Timmy 我想要出名嘛 |
[09:42] | And famous people get a shitload of ass. | 名人总会受到很牛X的待遇 |
[09:45] | Yay, Bigfoot! | 大脚怪万岁 |
[09:51] | – Is it? – Could it be? | – 我没看错吧? – 是真的吧? |
[09:53] | You damn right it is. | 一点都不错 |
[09:54] | 丘巴卡: 星球大战里的种族 千年隼号: 星球大战里的飞船 | |
[09:54] | Yo, Chewbacca, you got to give me a ride in the Millennium Falcon. | 哟 丘巴卡 能带我到千年隼号上走一遭吗? |
[09:57] | No, it’s Bigfoot, the mythical creature that’s responsible for | 错了 他是大脚怪 光靠这一种神秘的生物 |
[10:00] | countless hours of shitty programming on the Discovery Channel. | 探索频道都做过无数小时的垃圾节目了 |
[10:03] | – Connie, look who’s here. – Yeah, nice to meet you, Bigfoot. | – Connie 快看谁来了 – 随便啦 你好 大脚兄 |
[10:07] | Guys, I’m worried about Steve. He’s been missing since yesterday. | 大家 我还是担心Steve 他从昨天开始就没露过面了 |
[10:10] | Ah, screw Steve. | Steve可以去死 |
[10:12] | Bigfoot’s a bona fide tourist attraction. | 大脚怪才是真正的旅游亮点 |
[10:14] | But Steve’s our friend. I think he could be in danger. | 但Steve是咱的朋友啊 我担心他遇到危险了 |
[10:17] | That’s very sweet of you, stranger who I’ve never met, | 你对他真是关心有加 素未谋面的陌生人 |
[10:20] | but let’s not draw attention away from me, Bigfoot, because that’s who I am. | 可以再把注意力回到我身上吗? 大脚怪 如假包换 |
[10:25] | Mr. Foot, please feel welcome here at Brickleberry. | “脚”先生 脆莓就是你的家啦 |
[10:29] | As long as you don’t go all chimpy and rip our faces off. | 只要别撒野把俺们脸都撕下来就行啊 |
[10:34] | I think I just gave him an idea. | 丫不会真想使这招了吧 |
[10:36] | Fear not, humanoids. Bigfoot’s your friend. | 不用怕 类人族 大脚怪是你们朋友 |
[10:39] | Unlike that Jew-hating Loch Ness Monster. | 不会像那个反犹太的尼斯湖水怪 |
[10:41] | I hate the Jews! | 老子恨死犹太人 |
[10:43] | All I desire is your adulation. | 我只求你们取悦我 |
[10:45] | Somebody give me some rubber gloves. | 那谁给我准备点橡皮手套 |
[10:47] | If I’m gonna adulate this guy, I don’t want to get that gunk all over my hands. | 就算要取悦这货 我也不想弄得一手酸奶糊糊 |
[10:52] | Hey, Steve. | 嘿 Steve |
[10:53] | I’m not Steve, my fellow woodland creature. | 我不是什么Steve 我的林栖动物小伙伴 |
[10:56] | I’m the notorious B-i-g… | 我可是声名狼籍的… 大… 啊… |
[10:59] | F-o-o-t… | 脚嗷… 怪… |
[11:02] | E. | 拼对没? |
[11:03] | Hair or no hair, you smell like a Turkish man’s balls. | 管你有毛没毛 你闻起来就一土耳其佬的蛋蛋 |
[11:06] | Please, Malloy, don’t blow this for me. | 求你了 Malloy 别拆穿我啊 |
[11:08] | No one gives a damn about Steve. This is a chance to reinvent myself. | Steve的死活没人在乎 这是我改头换面的机会啊 |
[11:12] | Take it easy, Polamalu. I’m not gonna blow your cover. | 放心吧 转型男 我不会拆穿你的 |
[11:15] | There’s money to be made here. And I’ll be your manager. | 这里面可有钱赚 我当你的经纪人就行 |
[11:18] | Okay. 5% sound fair? | 好吧 5%听着可以吧? |
[11:20] | – Sure. I’ll give you 5%. – Deal. Wow, you’re shrewd. | – 行啊 就给你5% – 成交 靠 熊孩子真会算 |
[11:23] | I’m lucky you’re on my side. | 还好你是我这边的 |
[12:04] | Oh, you poor baby. | 你个可怜的小宝贝 |
[12:06] | Ethel will make it all better. | Ethel会让一切都变好的 |
[12:10] | What the hell are you doing? | 你特么这是干嘛? |
[12:11] | I have to do it Denzel, this cute little guy was abandoned by his mother. | 情非得已啊 Denzel 这萌人小崽子被它妈抛弃了 |
[12:15] | He wasn’t abandoned by his mother. | 人家才没被妈妈抛弃 |
[12:17] | His mother’s right there. | 它妈就在旁边呢 |
[12:20] | – Oh, my God. You shot it! – Well, I had no choice, Denzel. | – 我滴个天爷 让你打死了 – 我别无选择啊 Denzel |
[12:23] | It was distraught its baby was about to die. | 一看幼崽要死 她就失去理智了 |
[12:26] | All right, Ethel, what the hell is going on with you? | 别说了 Ethel 你特么哪根筋抽了? |
[12:30] | All right, here’s the thing. | 好吧 是这样的 |
[12:32] | When I killed that deer, I had the best orgasm of my life. | 杀鹿那天 我享受到了一生中最棒的高潮 |
[12:37] | I’ve been chasing that dragon ever since. | 之后我就走上了这条不归路 |
[12:40] | Ethel, you’re confused. Women don’t have no orgasms. | Ethel 你糊涂啊 女人才不会有高潮呢 |
[12:43] | – And you got to stop this killing, girl. – I guess you’re right, Denzel. | – 你可别杀生了啊 妹子 – 可能你说得对 Denzel |
[12:46] | I promise, no more killing. | 我答应你 不再杀生 |
[12:49] | Starting now. | 从现在开始 |
[12:55] | Sasquatch! | 萨支科奇人 |
[12:56] | I got your face tattooed on my anus! | 我可在菊花处纹了你的脸哟 |
[12:59] | Much love. Wish I could stop. | 超爱你 真心希望我可以停车啥的 |
[13:01] | Let’s talk big picture here. | 我们来谈谈宏大前景吧 |
[13:03] | How long we gonna milk this Wookiee in the woods routine? | “森林里的伍基人”这出到底要演多久? |
[13:05] | What are you talking about? Steve is dead. | 你说些什么呀? Steve已经是历史了 |
[13:07] | I’m gonna be Bigfoot forever. | 我要做一辈子大脚怪 |
[13:09] | Hey, Bigfoot, if it wouldn’t be too much trouble, | 嘿 大脚怪 如果不是太打扰的话 |
[13:11] | could you make love to my wife while I watch? | 能请你上我老婆 让我围观吗? |
[13:14] | Inappropriate. | 没节操 |
[13:17] | – I’m blind! – Trust me. I did you a favor. | – 我瞎了 – 相信我 我帮了你大忙 |
[13:20] | So, Steve, big gig on Wednesday. | 继续 Steve 周三有大活儿 |
[13:22] | You’re gonna be emceeing a dwarf fashion show. | 你要去主持一个侏儒时装秀 |
[13:24] | No can do, baby. I’m going to the ranger ball. | 没门儿 亲 我要参加林警舞会 |
[13:27] | But I already booked Giselle Munchkin. | 但我都预订侏儒芭蕾舞剧了 |
[13:29] | Sorry, Malloy, the ball is tomorrow night, | 不好意思 Malloy 明晚就是舞会了 |
[13:31] | and I know just who I’m going to take. | 而且我知道要带谁参加了 |
[13:33] | Oh, God! | 苍天啊 |
[13:35] | Oops, sorry. Wrong picture. | 啊哟 不好意思 拿错了 |
[13:37] | The most beautiful woman in the world. | 全世界最漂亮的女人 |
[13:40] | I cannot believe you are gonna make me kill all those Dwarves. | 我不敢相信你逼我宰掉所有的侏儒 |
[13:43] | Who said anything about killing Dwarves? | 谁说要宰掉侏儒了? |
[13:45] | It’s either that or I pay them. | 不宰光 就得付他们违约金 |
[13:47] | And I’m not planning on paying them. | 我可没打算付什么违约金 |
[13:49] | So that means I’m going to have to kill them. | 自然我就得把他们宰光 |
[13:53] | Steve Steve! | |
[13:54] | Oh, Steve! | 在哪里 Steve |
[13:58] | Oh, no. | 不会吧 |
[14:02] | This is terrible. | 真是惨绝人寰 |
[14:03] | Hey, have you seen the little bear? He told us to meet him right here. | 嘿 你见到那只小熊没? 他约我们在这里碰头 |
[14:19] | You look beautiful, my love. | 你看起来真美 女神 |
[14:21] | Hey, no kiss on mouth. | 嘿 不许亲嘴巴 |
[14:23] | Baby hatch okay, but not on mouth. | 底下随便亲 嘴巴不行 |
[14:25] | Oh, you are one classy lady. | 你真是位有品位的女士 |
[14:28] | Stacy should be here any minute. I’m so excited. | Stacy随时都可能到 我好激动 |
[14:32] | Why are you so obsessed with this girl from high school? | 为毛你痴迷一个破高中女同学? |
[14:34] | You should be dating a celebrity. It’s good for the brand. | 你应该傍个名人 对我们名牌有好处 |
[14:37] | Like Audrey Hepburn? | 比如奥黛丽·赫本? |
[14:38] | Yeah, but alive and not as much of a whore. | 对啊 但要活着的 而且不要太浪的 |
[14:41] | That must be her. The most beautiful girl on earth. | 那应该就是她了 世界上最美的女人 |
[14:45] | She hasn’t changed a bit. | 她一点儿都没变啊 |
[14:47] | Madame, shall we? | 女士 我们走吧? |
[14:49] | Bigfoot, you are so handsome. | 大脚怪 你还真是英俊 |
[14:51] | Oh, my God. That’s awesome. | 我的天啊 帅呆了 |
[14:54] | You sound just like Megatron. | 你说话好像威震天一样 |
[14:56] | Oh, Bigfoot, I feel like I could start a new life with you. | 过奖 大脚怪 我觉得我能跟你开始新的人生旅程 |
[15:00] | Here are the keys. Drive ’em into the lake. | 给你钥匙 直接把车开湖里得了 |
[15:05] | Yo, yo, biggity foot inside the house. | 哟 哟 大脚哥闪亮登场 |
[15:08] | What’s the deal? | 搞什么鬼? |
[15:09] | I thought this was supposed to be a party. | 说好今天办派对的啊 |
[15:11] | Yeah, but it turned into a memorial service. | 没错 但最后成了一场追悼会 |
[15:14] | We just got some bad news, Bigfoot. | 我们有些坏消息 大脚怪 |
[15:16] | Connie found Steve’s car smashed in a ravine. | Connie发现Steve的车撞进了地沟 |
[15:19] | He must have lost control. | 一定是车失控了 |
[15:21] | His tires were as bald as his head. | 他灰飞烟灭得跟他的秃瓢一样干净 |
[15:24] | Oh. All right. | 好… 好吧 |
[15:26] | Let’s have a moment of silence. | 让我们静穆片刻 |
[15:28] | Okay, let’s tear this shit up! | 得嘞 嗨起来赶走晦气 |
[15:31] | No. Tonight we honor our friend. | 不 今晚我们只悼念我们的伙伴 |
[15:34] | And shame on all of you for teasing him for something he couldn’t help. | 鄙视所有你这种嘲笑他无能的孙子 |
[15:37] | – I feel terrible. – Yeah, me too. | – 我难受透了 – 我也是 |
[15:41] | Me too. | 我也是 |
[15:43] | I never met this Steve fellow, but he sounds like a great guy. | 我没见过这个Steve 但看样他是个好小伙 |
[15:46] | Hold on. You had every right to treat Steve like an asshole. | 慢着 你们哪点不该把Steve当成粪球? |
[15:50] | He was bald. | 丫是个秃子 |
[15:51] | But you know who has lots of hair? | 但知道谁最毛茸茸吗? |
[15:53] | Bigfoot. Come on, everyone! | 大脚怪 来嘛 大家伙 |
[15:55] | Do the Bigfoot. It goes a little something like this. | 学我大脚怪 都来跟我这么玩 |
[16:04] | Stop Bigfoot dancing. | 别跳大脚舞了 |
[16:07] | Why don’t you want us to remember our friend? | 为什么你不想我们悼念自己的朋友? |
[16:09] | I’ll tell you why. | 我来告诉你们 |
[16:11] | The police lab just analyzed Steve’s clothes, and they were covered in hair… | 警察实验室对Steve的衣物做了分析 上面沾满了毛 |
[16:15] | Hair genetically identical to this! | 基因鉴定证明毛是这货的 |
[16:20] | Okay, guys, there’s an explanation for this. | 好吧 伙计们 我可以对此作出解释 |
[16:22] | Yeah. There is. | 是啊 有解释 |
[16:24] | You killed Steve. | 你谋杀了Steve |
[16:26] | – He’s a murderer! – He’s a monster! | – 他是谋杀犯 – 他是怪兽 |
[16:29] | Look who’s talking. | 有脸说别人 |
[16:32] | No, it’s a misunderstanding. Tell ’em, Malloy. | 不 这里面有误会 你说啊 Malloy |
[16:36] | I have no idea what this Bigfoot is talking about. | 真不知道这个大脚怪在说啥 |
[16:39] | Sorry, buddy, but your death is gonna make for a merchandising bonanza. | 对不住了 哥们儿 你一死 营销这块就有得赚了 |
[16:42] | – Let’s get him. – We’re gonna bring you to justice. | – 逮住他 – 我们要将你绳之以法 |
[16:45] | To hell with justice. I am gonna kill you. | 去他的狗屁法 我这就宰了你 |
[16:47] | And I am really gonna enjoy it. | 我会好好享受这一刻的 |
[16:52] | Uh-oh. Somebody call FEMA. | 失手 还是找联邦应急管理局吧 |
[16:54] | It feels like a levee just broke in my pants. | 感觉下边潮涌了的说 |
[17:01] | Who the hell brings torches and pitchforks to a ball? | 谁特么参加舞会还带火把和干草叉啊? |
[17:07] | We gonna get you, Bigfoot! | 你逃不掉的 大脚怪 |
[17:09] | I’m not Bigfoot. Let me explain. | 我不是大脚怪 容我解释 |
[17:14] | Oh, sorry about that, BoDean. | 真不好意思 BoDean |
[17:16] | What? | 啥? |
[17:18] | There you go, buddy. Good as new. | 这就得嘞 伙计 崭新崭新的 |
[17:21] | What? | 啥? |
[17:26] | Damn, this Bigfoot fast. | 擦 大脚怪溜得真快 |
[17:27] | I want justice. | 我得求个公道 |
[17:29] | I make my own goddamn justice. | 公道特么的自在人心 |
[17:31] | It’s looting time up in this bitch! | 不如先来洗劫这破车吧 |
[17:35] | Shit, this is my car. | 靠 这是哥的车 |
[17:44] | Die, you big-footed freak. Die! | 去死吧 大脚怪胎 去死 |
[17:50] | Give me that. I’m a natural predator. | 把枪给我 我可是天生捕食好手 |
[17:53] | No! No. I have to do it. | 滚 休想 这事儿必须我来 |
[17:56] | You try that again, and I will blow your frickin’ head off. | 你再抢 我崩烂你丫熊脑袋 |
[17:59] | That’s weird. Usually I can smell your period. | 奇了怪了 一般你来姨妈我能闻出来 |
[18:12] | Show yourself, killer. | 滚出来 凶手 |
[18:17] | I like boobies. | 我喜欢奶子 |
[18:33] | Aw, man. | 完蛋了 |
[18:34] | Prepare to meet Bigfoot Jesus, you hairy son of a bitch. | 准备面见大脚耶稣吧 你个毛崽子 |
[18:39] | Damn it, BoDean, don’t stand in front of me when I’m shooting something. | 我擦 BoDean 敢不在我崩人的时候站出来吗? |
[18:42] | – What? – I ain’t got anymore gum. | – 啥? – 我反正没唾沫了 |
[18:44] | That’s okay, Bobby. | 没事的 Bobby |
[18:46] | Wow, good solution. | 好吧 真有你的 |
[18:47] | Now prepare to die. | 准备受死吧 |
[18:49] | I’m not prepared. | 我还没准备好呢 |
[18:54] | Bigfoot? | 大脚怪? |
[18:56] | So you are real. | 原来真有你 |
[19:00] | Thank you for saving my life. | 感谢你救了我的命 |
[19:02] | I don’t blame you for hiding from society all these years, mythical giant. | 我不会怪你躲开人世这么多年了 神话巨人 |
[19:07] | You are not the savage. We are. | 你不是野蛮人 人类才是 |
[19:09] | We humans are vulgar, violent, and, above all, never to be trusted. | 我们人类暴力粗俗 最要命的是 永远信不过 |
[19:15] | Shoot him. He killed Steve. | 崩了他 他杀了Steve |
[19:29] | Ah, that was uncomfortable for all of us. | 你搞得我们很不舒服好吗? |
[19:34] | I can’t believe I killed the real Bigfoot. | 难以置信我杀了大脚怪真身 |
[19:37] | He was completely innocent, as are all animals. | 他完全是无辜的 就像所有动物一样 |
[19:41] | How will I ever forgive myself? | 我要怎么原谅自己? |
[19:43] | You probably won’t. | 估计原谅不了了 |
[19:45] | I mean, not with this as a constant reminder. | 毕竟这玩意儿会常年提醒你 |
[19:47] | You can almost tell that his last words were “you bitch”. | 都能看出他最后一句在说”你个臭婊子” |
[19:52] | Hey, everybody. | 嘿 各位 |
[19:53] | I just want you to know I feel terrible about pretending to be Bigfoot. | 我只想让你们知道 我对伪装大脚怪这事很抱歉 |
[19:56] | Yeah, you should. | 废话 必须的 |
[19:57] | And when are you gonna get rid of that stupid asshole hair, | 你丫哪天能脱掉这身傻X贱人毛 |
[20:00] | you stupid, hairy asshole? | 你个傻X毛贱人 |
[20:01] | I’ve tried everything. I guess the drug’s just got to wear off. | 法子已经试尽了 只能等药效自己消退了 |
[20:05] | – Nice to have you back, Steve. – Thanks, Connie. | – 真高兴你回来 Steve – 谢谢 Connie |
[20:08] | The one thing I’ve realized throughout this whole ordeal | 这一次艰苦考验让我看透一件事 |
[20:10] | is what a great friend you are to me. | 姐们儿你对我真仗义 |
[20:12] | Oh, come on. | 快得啦 |
[20:14] | No, you are really an amazing person. | 得了干嘛? 你真心是个很赞的人 |
[20:16] | I should have just saved myself a lot of trouble and taken you to the dance. | 我当初不该整这出毛事 领着你去跳舞就对了 |
[20:21] | – Shall we? – I’d be honored. | – 赏个脸吗? – 荣幸之至 |
[20:25] | Nothing could ruin this special moment. | 没啥能破坏这别致的一刻 |
[20:28] | Except that. | 除了这个 |
[20:29] | Yes, Steve’s back in all his glory. | 好哎 Steve又金光闪闪蛋生啦 |
[20:33] | Damn, Steve, cover your ass up. | 见鬼 Steve 牙刷能遮起来么 |
[20:35] | No. I’ll never feel shame again. | 不 我要跟羞耻道永别 |
[20:38] | I am a bald, overweight man with misshapen genitals, and proud of it! | 哥就是个长着畸形屌的秃胖子 傲娇起来 |
[20:44] | Soak it in, everybody. | 跪拜吧 凡人们 |