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美式主妇(American Housewife)第2季第9集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月10日 By jubentaici_movie_user 美式主妇(American Housewife)第2季第9集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10
S01E11
S01E12
S01E13
S01E14
S01E15
S01E16
S01E17
S01E18
S01E19
S01E20
S01E21
S01E22
S01E23
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10
S02E11
S02E12
S02E13
S02E14
S02E15
S02E16
S02E17
S02E18
S02E19
S02E20
S02E21
S02E22
S02E23
S02E24
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
S03E09
S03E10
S03E11
S03E12
S03E13
S03E14
S03E15
S03E16
S03E17
S03E18
S03E19
S03E20
S03E21
S03E22
S03E23
S04E01
S04E02
S04E03
S04E04
S04E05
S04E06
S04E07
S04E08
S04E09
S04E10
S04E11
S04E12
S04E13
S04E14
S04E15
S04E16
S04E17
S04E18
S04E19
S04E20
S05E01
S05E02
S05E03
S05E04
S05E05
S05E06
S05E07
S05E08
S05E09
S05E10
S05E11
S05E12
S05E13
时间 英文 中文
[00:03] Flavor of Westport, “西港的风味”
[00:05] where the hippest restaurants in town 在这里 市里最时尚的餐厅
[00:07] offer samples of their signature dishes. 派送他们招牌菜的试吃品
[00:09] Quinoa pie, kale on a stick. 藜麦派 甘蓝串
[00:12] Things I would eat if I was on the show “Survivor” 这些是我在《幸存者》节目中会吃的东西
[00:13] and I already ate every rat on the island. 而且我已经吃完了岛上的所有老鼠
[00:16] Greg, Katie, hi! 格雷格 凯蒂 你们好
[00:18] This is also a great place to bump into the people 这里也是一个碰上熟人的好地方
[00:20] I spend all week trying to avoid. 我一整周都想避开的熟人
[00:22] Have you guys heard about the big shake-up at school? 你们听说了学校的大变动吗
[00:25] Did one of those lonely moms finally do 10 minutes in the shed 有个寂寞的妈妈终于和那个性感园丁
[00:27] with that sexy groundskeeper? 在小木屋里搞了十分钟
[00:28] No. 不
[00:29] The new chairs I’ve been fighting for were approved. 我拼命争取的椅子被批准了
[00:31] We now have lumbar support for our children! 现在我们的孩子有腰部支撑了
[00:34] Three things happen when you become parents. 做父母后会发生三件事
[00:35] You buy a minivan, 买小型厢式车
[00:37] you use the word “Potty” around adults, 在成人面前说”便壶”这个词
[00:38] and every conversation becomes about the kids. 所以谈话都是与孩子有关的
[00:41] We have so much children’s medicine in the house, 我们家里有好多孩子的药
[00:44] but I can never find those little plastic measuring thingies. 但我总是找不到那种塑料的测量工具
[00:46] Where do they go? 去哪里了
[00:48] Probably hanging out with all the missing socks. 可能和失踪的袜子在一起玩
[00:52] Missing socks! 失踪的袜子
[00:53] This is so boring. 真无聊
[00:58] Beets, fish oil, pollen, and — 甜菜 鱼油 花粉 还有
[01:02] oh, I’m forgetting one — peanuts! 我忘了一个 花生
[01:04] Those are all of Holden’s allergies. 这些是霍尔登过敏的东西
[01:06] Okay. Now I’ll go. 好了 到我了
[01:07] Hay weed, gluten, 干草 麸质品
[01:10] – hypoallergenic foam… – Super boring. -低过敏性沐浴露 -超级无聊
[01:13] I can’t believe you left me with that couple. 我不敢相信你把我扔给那对夫妻
[01:15] They took me through the entire evolution 他们带我经历了一遍他们儿子
[01:16] of their son’s pronunciation of “Blueberry.” 对”蓝莓”发音的演变
[01:18] Don’t recap that conversation for me. 别对我重复这番对话
[01:20] I actually sat in a hot Port-a-Potty 我坐在热死人的移动厕所里
[01:22] for 20 minutes to avoid it. 20分钟躲过一劫
[01:23] We should go. 我们得走了
[01:25] I have to help Anna-Kat write a five-minute story 我得帮安娜凯特写个五分钟的故事
[01:26] for the Kid Lit assembly this weekend. 这周末的儿童故事会上要读
[01:27] I think she focuses better after a string cheese. 我觉得她吃奶酪棒后更能专心
[01:29] But not the yellow kind or the white kind. 但不能吃那种黄色或白色的
[01:31] The yellow-swirled-with-white kind. 得吃那种白色带黄色盘旋图案的
[01:33] Cheddarella. 切得瑞拉
[01:34] Remember that time we gave her the store brand? 还记得那次我们给她吃商店品牌的吗
[01:35] Yikes-arella. 恶心瑞拉
[01:36] Oh, my God. 我的天
[01:38] Now we’re boring ourselves. 现在我们在让自己觉得无聊
[01:39] We have no life outside of our kids. 我们没有孩子以外的生活
[01:41] That’s not true. 不是这样
[01:43] Okay, the other day, I was carpool lane — 那天 我在拼车道…
[01:44] Uhp, that’s the kids. Never mind. We have no life. 也是孩子 算了 我们没生活
[01:47] Hold that thought. 先等等
[01:48] My trans-fat sense is tingling. 我的反式脂肪感觉有反应
[01:50] I smell something… fried. 我闻到了油炸的东西
[01:54] …they must be hanging out with the missing socks, right? 它们肯定和失踪的袜子在一起玩
[01:57] Hey, that’s my line. 那是我的台词
[02:02] Greg, at my funeral, along with bagpipes, 格雷格 在我的葬礼上 除了风笛
[02:05] I want funnel cakes. 我还要油炸饼
[02:06] I haven’t tasted a funnel cake this good 我上次吃到这么好吃的油炸饼
[02:08] since the Florida State Fair. 还是在佛州农贸集会上
[02:10] Are you from Florida? 你们来自佛州吗
[02:11] Yeah, born and raised. 对 土生土长
[02:13] We just moved here from Myrtle Grove. 我们刚从莫特戈鲁夫搬来
[02:14] We used to play you guys in football! 我们以前有橄榄球赛
[02:16] What?! 什么
[02:18] We must’ve partied at the same tailgate at the Speedway. 我们肯定参加过高速公路的同一个车尾派对
[02:22] Do you know the secret about the beer stand by the Quaker State sign? 你知道贵格州标牌旁边啤酒摊的秘密吗
[02:24] Flash ’em for a six pack? 露胸部换六瓶啤酒
[02:25] I never paid for a beer in four years. 我四年都没付啤酒钱
[02:28] Hold on. 慢着
[02:29] You’re familiar with John Stuart Mill? 你很熟悉约翰·斯图尔特·米尔
[02:30] – Of course! – You don’t understand, -当然 -你不知道
[02:32] you’re the first person to ever say that to me. 你是第一个这样对我说的人
[02:34] No, no, I understand. 不 我知道
[02:35] We’re two Mill-heads. Okay. 我们是两个米尔粉 好了
[02:37] Your favorite essay collection on three. 数到三 说出你最爱的论文
[02:38] One, two, three. 一二三
[02:40] “Two Letters on the Measure of Value”! 价值尺度的两封信
[02:44] So, have you gotten a feel for the town? 你对这里有想法吗
[02:46] Oh, yeah. 有
[02:47] They should change their motto to 这里的座右铭应该改成
[02:48] “Westport — our foreheads haven’t moved since 1862.” 西港 我们的额头自1862年就没动过
[02:51] Yeah, yeah. 对
[02:52] “Westport — our women own 西港 这里的女人拥有
[02:54] 80% of the world’s tennis skirts.” 全世界80%的网球裙
[02:57] Hey, babe, we better get going. 亲爱的 我们得走了
[02:58] Where you off to? 你们去哪里
[03:00] Oh, we have tickets for a cruise around Sagatuck. 我们有塞格塔克的邮轮观光票
[03:02] But, hey, we should get together sometime. 我们应该改天一起玩
[03:04] Here is my card. 这是我的名片
[03:04] Thanks. 谢谢
[03:05] – See you, guys. – See you later. -回见 -回见
[03:07] Bye! 拜拜
[03:09] I loved her! 我爱她
[03:10] I loved him! 我爱他
[03:11] I can’t believe we finally found a couple that we both like! 真不敢相信我们找到了我们都喜欢的夫妻
[03:13] Don’t get your hopes up about Courtney and Zach. 别对科特尼和扎克期望太高
[03:15] I saw them move in. 他们搬来时我看到了
[03:17] They don’t have kids. 他们没有孩子
[03:18] Damn. 见鬼
[03:19] Why? What’s the big deal? 怎么了 这有什么
[03:21] Couples without kids hate couples with kids. 没孩子的夫妻讨厌有孩子的夫妻
[03:24] Then he said “Boo-bewwy.” 他说的是”布莓莓”
[03:26] Wait. No. 慢着 不
[03:27] First, three months, he said “Bwoo-bewwy.” 最先三个月 他说的是”乌莓莓”
[03:31] ‘Cause couples with kids are so b-o-o-oring. 因为有孩子的夫妻太无聊
[03:37] Looks good. 看起来不错
[03:48] I was thinking. 我在想
[03:49] Is it so inconceivable we could be friends with Courtney and Zach? 我们和科特尼 扎克做朋友不太可行吗
[03:51] These people have exciting lives. 他们有精彩的生活
[03:53] They don’t want to hang out with parents. 他们不会想和当父母的一起玩
[03:55] We’ve got baggage. 我们有负担
[03:57] Here comes the middle bag now. 排行第二的负担来了
[03:59] Mom, a word about the quality of our lunches. 妈 说下午餐的质量
[04:02] – Are they not up to your standards? – No. -没有达到你的要求吗 -没
[04:04] Would it kill you to dry the lettuce 你在做三明治前先弄干生菜
[04:06] before you make the sandwich? 你会死吗
[04:07] I don’t know. 我不知道
[04:08] Would it kill you if I put you in burlap sack 如果我把你装进粗麻袋
[04:10] with a couple of bricks and threw you off a bridge? 加上砖扔下桥 你会死吗
[04:13] I think you should go. 我想你应该走了
[04:16] What if we just don’t mention the kids? 我们不提孩子怎么样
[04:17] Interesting. 有意思
[04:19] – So you want to lie? – Not lie. -你想说谎 -不是说谎
[04:20] Just hide the truth until they’re deeper in the relationship. 只是在建立深厚的感情前先隐藏事实
[04:23] You know, like you did when we were dating. 就像我们约会时你做的
[04:24] You thought I liked foreign films. 你以为我喜欢外国电影
[04:26] Ooh, “Chocolat”! 《浓情巧克力》
[04:27] That was in English. 那是英语的
[04:29] It felt foreign. 感觉像国外的
[04:29] But you’re right. 但你是对的
[04:31] We just won’t mention the kids. 我们不提孩子就成
[04:33] – Let me do the talking. – Why? -我来说 -为什么
[04:34] Because your voice gets all high when you’re nervous. 因为你紧张时声音会变尖
[04:36] It does? 是吗
[04:37] Is that why they’re always calling me “Ma’am” 所以我在得来速点餐时
[04:39] when I order at drive-throughs? 他们叫我女士
[04:40] Who the hell gets nervous at a drive-through? 谁会在得来速点餐时紧张
[04:42] It’s a lot of pressure. 压力好大
[04:43] People are waiting. They can’t always hear you. 后面有人在等 里面的人听不到点单
[04:45] Okay, fine. 好吧
[04:47] – But put it on speaker so I can hear. – Okay. -打开扬声器让我听 -好
[04:51] – Hello? – Hey, Zach, it’s Katie. -喂 -扎克 我是凯蒂
[04:53] Oh, hey, Katie. 凯蒂
[04:54] Courtney and I were just talking about you guys. 科特尼和我正在说你们
[04:55] Us, too. 我们也说到你们
[04:57] We figured why not call and make a plan to hang out. 我们就想着何不打个电话做个安排
[04:59] How about dinner tomorrow night? 明天吃晚饭怎么样
[05:00] Oh, hey, Courtney! Works for us. 科特尼 我们可以去
[05:02] We found this great off-the-beaten-path Vietnamese place. 我们找到一家非常棒的冷门越南餐厅
[05:06] – You guys like pho? – Fo sho! -你们喜欢河粉吗 -当然
[05:08] Perfect. See you guys tomorrow night. 完美 明晚见
[05:10] – Who’s the man?! – I am! -谁是爷们 -我是
[05:12] – Who’s the woman?! – That’s not a saying! -谁是娘们 -没这种说法
[05:13] Feels sexist leaving you out! 不带你玩有些性别歧视
[05:15] We can’t do this kind of crap tomorrow night! 我们明晚可不能这样表现
[05:20] Okay, ground rules for tonight. 好的 今晚的基本要求
[05:21] Taylor’s in charge, 泰勒负责
[05:23] and there can be no more disasters. 不能再发生灾难
[05:24] What do you mean by disasters? 什么叫灾难
[05:26] Last time we let you babysit, 上次让你照看孩子
[05:27] you guys played hide-and-seek with Anna-Kat 你们和安娜凯特玩捉迷藏
[05:28] and gave up without telling her. 没告诉她就放弃了
[05:29] She was zipped inside an old suitcase for five hours. 她拉上拉链在旧行李箱里待了五个小时
[05:32] We didn’t give up. 我们没放弃
[05:33] We just never looked. 我们只是没找她
[05:34] This is your last shot. 这是你最后的机会
[05:36] If you can’t prove that you’re responsible, 如果你无法证明你是负责任的
[05:38] then you can’t go to the concert with your friends next week. 那么下周你就不能和朋友去听演唱会
[05:40] – Got it? – Got it. -明白吗 -明白
[05:42] This dinner we’re going to is important, 我们要参加的晚餐非常重要
[05:44] so don’t call unless it’s really an emergency. 除非是真的有紧急事 才能打电话找我们
[05:46] That means only call from the hospital 就是说只能从医院打来
[05:48] and not just from the waiting room. 还不能在候诊室打
[05:49] Call once you’re admitted and stretched out on one of those wheely beds. 你们躺在轮床上了再打
[05:54] Wait. You guys can’t leave. 等等 你们不能走
[05:56] I want to tell you what happened on my show, “Adventure Cats.” 我想跟你们讲讲我看的《冒险猫》的情节
[05:58] Let’s get out of here 我们快走
[05:59] before she recounts every minute in real time. 她会复述每一分钟的情节
[06:01] So, Captain Meowington was leading an expedition 喵温顿上尉乘竹筏在亚马逊河上
[06:05] down the Amazon River on a bamboo raft… 领导远征
[06:07] That’s so exciting! Go, go, go, go, go! 好激动 快走
[06:09] And then a snake just fell down out of the trees, 然后一条蛇从树上掉下来
[06:12] right onto Captain Meowington’s lap. 正好掉在喵温顿上尉的大腿上
[06:15] Oh! The snake episode! 蛇的那一集
[06:18] Oliver was just asking how it ends. 奥利弗正在问后面怎样了
[06:21] Tell him. 告诉他
[06:22] Don’t waste another minute on us. 别在我们身上浪费时间
[06:27] All right, let’s clear our heads of all of that. 好了 把头脑里的东西清干净
[06:31] Shake it off. 统统忘掉
[06:32] Remember, we don’t have kids. 记住 我们没孩子
[06:35] Did we leave them enough money for pizza? 给他们的钱足够买披萨吗
[06:37] – I think so. – Wrong! -我想是的 -错
[06:39] The correct answer is “Who?” 正确的答案是”谁”
[06:40] because we don’t have kids. 因为我们没孩子
[06:42] Be better! 表现好点
[06:43] Noted. 知道了
[06:44] – All right, let’s do this. – Greg! -我们走 -格雷格
[06:45] Your keychain. 你的钥匙扣
[06:48] Oh, my God! 我的天
[06:51] I’ll get the spare. 我去拿备用钥匙
[06:52] Okay. 好
[06:54] Then Captain Meowington 然后喵温顿上尉
[06:56] gave up his rank and command to raise his kittens. 放弃了军衔和指挥权 去抚养他的小猫咪
[06:59] Really? I knew he had a heart of gold. 是吗 我就知道他是个好人
[07:00] Greg! 格雷格
[07:01] Sorry about that. 抱歉
[07:06] Okay. 好了
[07:11] Anna-Kat, dinner! 安娜凯特 晚饭
[07:13] There’s a lot riding on tonight. 今晚太重要了
[07:15] You and Anna-Kat are my responsibility. 你和安娜凯特是我的责任
[07:17] Nothing can go wrong. No one can get hurt. 不能出错 不能有人受伤
[07:19] – What’s in it for me? – What do you mean? -我有什么好处 -你什么意思
[07:21] Well, you’re getting something out of this. I want something, too. 你有好处 我也要好处
[07:24] – What’s your price? – Okay. -你想要什么 -好的
[07:26] I want you to do what Mom and Dad refuse to do — 我要你做爸妈拒绝做的
[07:29] drive me past the biggest houses in Westport, 开车带我经过西港最大的房子
[07:31] slowly… 要慢
[07:32] while I look up their value on Zillow. 我要同时在房产网上看房子的价值
[07:35] No way. 不可能
[07:36] I will break my pinkie right now. 我现在就折断我的小指
[07:39] Okay, fine. 好的
[07:41] It’s a deal. 说定了
[07:43] Who’s gonna wet my beak? 那我的好处呢
[07:45] What? 什么
[07:46] Here’s the thing. 是这样的
[07:47] I need to write a story to read out loud tomorrow night 我需要写一个故事 明晚的儿童故事会上
[07:50] at the Kid Lit assembly… 我要大声朗读
[07:51] only I don’t feel like writing it. 只是我不想写
[07:54] Do you get what I’m saying? 明白我的意思吗
[07:55] No. 不明白
[07:57] She wants you to write the story for her. 她要你为她写故事
[07:59] And you’re gonna help her because she’s kind of stupid. 你要帮她 因为她很笨
[08:01] Okay. 好的
[08:02] What will happen if we don’t? 如果我们不帮呢
[08:03] I saved some baby teeth just for this situation. 我为这种情况留了些乳牙
[08:07] Taylor let me jump off the counter, 泰勒让我从台子上跳下去
[08:09] and I knocked out my tooth! 我摔掉了牙齿
[08:11] Happy writing. 写作愉快
[08:19] We have been big fans of Vietnamese food 我们非常喜欢越南菜
[08:21] ever since we went backpacking outside of Hanoi last summer. 从我们去年夏天在河内市外背包旅游开始
[08:24] Oh, yeah, we rappelled down a waterfall, 我们系绳索下瀑布
[08:26] explored this tunnel system, went sand-boarding… 去隧道探险 滑沙
[08:28] But what about you? 你们呢
[08:30] I bet you guys have taken some great trips. 我相信你们也有很棒的旅行
[08:32] Oh, boy, have we. 老天 有啊
[08:35] Which one do you want to talk about first? 你想先说哪一个
[08:37] Let’s just pick a favorite. 选我们最喜欢的
[08:38] Which one is our favorite, Greg? 我们最喜欢哪个 格雷格
[08:41] When was our last vacation? 我们最后一次度假是什么时候
[08:42] Does staying at the Motel Six for a weekend 家里爆水管后 周末住在汽车旅馆
[08:44] after our pipes burst count? 算度假吗
[08:45] I think our favorite trip probably was… 我想我们最喜欢的旅行可能是
[08:50] when we went rafting down the Amazon. 我们在亚马逊乘竹筏
[08:52] Right, honey? 对吗 亲爱的
[08:54] We were some adventurous cats, 我们是探险的猫
[08:56] weren’t we, Katie? 不是吗 凯蒂
[08:58] That’s right. 对
[09:00] We were on bamboo rafts. 我们在竹筏上
[09:03] Yeah, our captain Me-Ow warned us 我们的船长米奥警告我们
[09:05] that it wasn’t a trip. 这不是旅行
[09:07] It was an exercise in survival. 这是生存训练
[09:09] We were admiring the scenery, 我们正在欣赏风景
[09:10] when this giant snake dropped down from the trees. 一条大蛇从树上掉下来
[09:13] So what’d you guys do? 你们怎么做的
[09:14] What did we do? 我们怎么做的
[09:17] My instincts just kicked in, 凭着我的本能反应
[09:19] and I punched it in the face. 一拳打上去
[09:20] Knocked it out cold. 把它干掉了
[09:22] Our Captain Me-Ow… 我们的米奥船长
[09:23] Who turned out to be a real sweetheart… 是个非常好的人
[09:24] …skinned it, cooked it up. 把它剥皮 做熟
[09:26] Best dinner we ever had. 有史以来最棒的晚餐
[09:27] I’m so jealous. 我好嫉妒
[09:29] Somebody is allergic to snake. 某人对蛇过敏
[09:36] So, we heard about this place in town that serves bespoke cocktails. 我们听说城里有个地方卖订制鸡尾酒
[09:39] Just pick a night and we’re there. 选个日子我们就去
[09:41] The night is now! 就是现在
[09:42] We’ll get the coats. 我们去拿外套
[09:45] Are they serious? It’s almost 9:30. 他们说真的吗 快9点半了
[09:46] – We’re already pushing our bedtime. – I know. -快到我们睡觉时间了 -我知道
[09:48] We should be in bed with me putting stuff in my Amazon cart 我们应该在床上 我在亚马逊网上把东西放进购物车
[09:50] and you telling me not to push the buy button. 你告诉我不要点购买键
[09:52] If we go to this bar, we still have to wake up early and deal with the kids, 如果我们去酒吧 明早依然得早起管孩子
[09:54] and I have to help Anna-Kat with her story. 我必须帮安娜凯特写她的故事
[09:55] If we don’t go to this bar, 如果我们不去酒吧
[09:56] they could meet a real kid-less couple 他们会认识真没孩子的夫妻
[09:58] who knows what the hell bespoke cocktails actually are. 人家会知道订制鸡尾酒到底是什么东西
[10:00] We could lose them, Greg. 我们会失去他们 格雷格
[10:01] Come on. 来吧
[10:03] We never put ourselves first. 我们从来没把自己放在第一位
[10:05] Let’s do something for us for a change. 这次为自己做点什么吧
[10:06] All right, let’s do it. 好的 我们去
[10:08] Look out, 11:00, here come the Ottos! 小心了 11点 奥图夫妻来了
[10:16] Last night was fun. The Ottos saw midnight. 昨晚真好玩 奥图夫妻过了12点还没睡
[10:18] Then I took a brief micro nap in the ladies room to rally, 我在女厕所打了个盹恢复精神
[10:21] and then we saw 12:45. 然后又撑到了12点45
[10:22] Do you think that they liked us? 你觉得他们喜欢我们吗
[10:23] I hope so. 希望喜欢
[10:24] What happens now? Do we call them? 怎么办 给他们打电话吗
[10:26] I don’t know how this works. 我不知道怎么做
[10:30] It’s not me! It’s you! 不是我的 是你的
[10:31] Help me find my phone! 帮我找手机
[10:35] Call it! 打电话
[10:36] Wait. It’s in my hand. 等等 在我手上
[10:37] It’s a text from Zach! 是扎克发的短信
[10:39] – They don’t play games! – They had fun! -他们没玩游戏 -他们很开心
[10:40] – What did they say exactly? – “We had fun!” -他们怎么说的 -“我们很开心”
[10:42] Yes! 太好了
[10:43] Mama, where’s my clean underwear? 妈妈 我的干净内裤在哪里
[10:45] Never mind. Going inside-out. 算了 反着穿
[10:47] Ugh, back to reality. 回到现实
[10:48] I got to go make breakfast, 我得去做早餐
[10:49] and you need to help Anna-Kat with her story. 你得帮安娜凯特写故事
[10:51] I’m texting him back. What do you think of this? 我回他 你觉得怎样
[10:53] “We had fun, too. Love you guys. Regards, Greg”? 我们也很开心 爱你们 此致 格雷格
[10:56] That is terrible, but reassuring. 太糟糕了 但我放心了
[10:59] You have no future in online dating. 你在网恋方面没希望
[11:00] You’re stuck with me forever. 你要永远和我在一起
[11:08] So, how did it go last night? 昨晚怎么样
[11:10] Perfect. 完美
[11:12] You know I’d love to throw this one under the bus, 你们知道我喜欢让她背黑锅
[11:14] but she did great. 但她的表现非常棒
[11:15] It’s true, Mama. 是真的 妈妈
[11:17] They spent the whole time helping me with my story 他们一直在帮我写故事
[11:18] for the Kid Lit assembly tonight. 今晚儿童故事会要读的
[11:20] I thought I was gonna help you with that. 我以为我要帮你写
[11:22] Guess you don’t need to anymore. 看来不需要你了
[11:24] Are you seeing this? 看到了吗
[11:25] Yeah, we stepped back, and they’re fine without us. 我们不管他们 没我们他们挺好
[11:27] What are we gonna do with all our newfound free time? 我们新发现的空余时间做什么
[11:32] But we’re already dressed for the day — 但我们已经穿好衣服了
[11:34] What am I saying? Who cares? 我说什么呢 谁管这些
[11:39] Story time. Let me hear what you got. 故事时间 说说你们的想法
[11:41] Okay, so we have a couple of options for you to choose from. 有几个你可以选
[11:44] The first is a story about friendship, 第一个是关于友谊的故事
[11:46] and it starts with two brown bears — 开头是两只棕熊
[11:48] Pass. What’s next? 过 下一个
[11:49] Well, we have another one about a mouse 另一个是老鼠
[11:51] who’s trying to track down a missing skateboard. 它想找到失踪的滑板
[11:53] No, too cute. 不 太过可爱
[11:55] But you watch “Adventure Cats,” 但你看《冒险猫》
[11:56] and that’s all about kittens. 里面全是猫咪
[11:57] I just watch that to unwind. 我只是看来放松的
[11:59] Here are a few things I want in my story — 我的故事中要有这几点
[12:01] The Donner Party, flesh-eating super-viruses, 唐纳队 吃肉超级病毒
[12:05] and dandelions. 蒲公英
[12:06] What do those even have to do with each other? 这些有什么关系
[12:08] Seems like a writer problem. 这是作者的问题
[12:10] Make it work. 想办法
[12:18] And Zach and Courtney took us to this cool restaurant, 扎克和科特尼带我们去一家很酷的餐厅
[12:20] then to a secret bar, and get this — 然后去秘密酒吧 听着
[12:22] this morning, Greg and I even had sex. 今天早上 格雷格和我做爱了
[12:25] Morning sex? 清晨爱爱
[12:26] Okay, quick question. 好了 我问一下
[12:28] Was the bed already made, 床已经铺好了吗
[12:30] and if so, did you then remake it? 做了后岂不是要重铺
[12:32] I’m telling you, hanging out with this couple 我告诉你们 和这对夫妻在一起
[12:34] reminded us that we once had a life outside of our kids. 让我们想起我们曾经拥有没有孩子的生活
[12:36] Well, enjoy it while you can. 及时行乐吧
[12:38] Take it from a single mom — 我这个单亲妈妈给点经验
[12:40] you can only hide your kids from the people you’re dating for so long. 对约会的人隐瞒孩子的时间是有限的
[12:42] ‘Cause when they find out, they’ll dump you. 对方发现后会甩了你
[12:44] Because you’re not spontaneous. 因为你不够随性
[12:46] And you can’t go to Nantucket 你也不能去楠塔基特岛
[12:47] because you got a kid that didn’t listen to you 因为有个孩子不听话
[12:49] and went outside without a jacket and got sick, 不穿外衣去室外 然后生病了
[12:51] so now you’re staying home while she’s at a beachhouse 现在你在家 而她去了海滩别墅
[12:53] with some bitch named Ruth. 和一个叫鲁丝的贱人在一起
[12:55] Don’t worry. We have a plan. 别担心 我们有安排
[12:57] We’re gonna get them invested in a fake version of ourselves, 我们会让他们和我们的假象培养感情
[13:00] then, when they fall in love, 等他们爱上我们时
[13:01] we’re gonna reveal our three little flaws. 我们才会暴露我们的小缺点
[13:03] Oh! I did the same thing with Richard. 我对理查德也是这样
[13:05] I let him believe I was nice. 我让他相信我是好人
[13:07] There’s no way some bitch named “Ruth” is hotter than I am. 叫鲁丝的贱人不可能比我漂亮
[13:10] Not possible. 不可能
[13:20] The kids are really getting along. 孩子们相处得非常好
[13:21] Don’t talk about it. You’ll jinx it. 别说 一说就不灵了
[13:23] You said our kids had great taste in music, 你说我们孩子的音乐品味很高
[13:25] then it was “Call Me Maybe” for a whole year. 结果听了一整年的《有空打给我》
[13:26] Let’s take advantage of this 我们好好利用这点
[13:28] and have Taylor watch the kids again tonight. 让泰勒今晚照顾孩子
[13:30] We can’t. We have Anna-Kat’s Lit assembly at 6:00. 不行 安娜凯特的故事会在6点
[13:31] Aw, man. I forgot about that. 讨厌 我忘了
[13:34] Anna-Kat, how many kids are reading tonight? 安娜凯特 今晚多少孩子读故事
[13:36] There are 24 kids in my class, 我们班有24个
[13:38] but there are two classes, so 48. 有两个班 所以一共有48人
[13:41] So fun! 真有意思
[13:44] If I take off running right now, 如果我现在走人
[13:45] I can get home, pack, 我可以回家 收拾行李
[13:46] and be in Canada by tomorrow morning. 明早就到加拿大了
[13:48] You are not going to Canada. 你不能去加拿大
[13:49] Get out of my head, man. 滚出我的脑袋
[13:51] I’m really excited for you to hear my story. 我很期待你们听我的故事
[13:53] It’s pretty amazing. 非常精彩
[13:54] It better be amazing, 最好很精彩
[13:56] or I’ll lock myself in my toy chest 否则我会把自己锁在玩具箱里
[13:58] and say that you kept me there all night. 说你关了我一整晚
[14:00] You wouldn’t. 你不会的
[14:02] Oh, yeah? 是吗
[14:03] “It’s so dark in here. 这里好黑
[14:06] I can’t…breathe!” 我无法呼吸
[14:10] Now give me a taste of your ice cream. 让我尝尝你的冰淇淋
[14:12] Aww, they’re sharing. 她们在分享
[14:14] We’re Parents of the Year. 我们是年度最佳父母
[14:15] Oh, crap, Greg! Look! 见鬼 格雷格 快看
[14:18] We can’t be seen with these jokers. 不能让他们看到我们和这些小丑在一起
[14:19] Guys, who wants candy? 你们谁想吃糖
[14:20] You always say 你总是说
[14:22] we’re not allowed to have two sweets in one day. 我们不能一天吃两顿甜品
[14:24] Young lady, when your father tells you to eat candy, 小姑娘 你爸让你吃糖
[14:26] you eat candy. 你就吃
[14:28] Come on, come on! 快来
[14:32] Anna-Kat’s sweater! 安娜凯特的毛衣
[14:34] Oh, I think you dropped this. 我想这是你掉的
[14:36] You dropped it. 你掉的
[14:38] Hey, look! 看
[14:40] It’s our new best friends! 是我们新交的好友
[14:41] Hey, guys! 你们好
[14:43] Just taking a leisurely stroll. 只是在随便逛逛
[14:44] Just the two of us, which we do every day. 就我们两个 我们每天都闲逛
[14:46] ‘Cause we have the time. 因为我们有空
[14:49] We were just about to call you guys. 我们正准备打电话给你们
[14:51] Oh, yeah! 是嘛
[14:52] Yeah, we decided to head up to our ski house in New Hampshire. 我们决定去新罕布什尔的滑雪屋
[14:54] Hit the hot tub, snowmobile in the morning, 泡泡热水浴 早上玩雪上摩托
[14:56] and then head back tomorrow. 明天回来
[14:57] Classic H-T-Sno-mo. 普通的一日游
[14:58] Sounds amazing! 太棒了
[14:59] We’d love for you guys to come 我们希望你们也去
[15:00] if you don’t already have plans tonight. 如果你们今晚没安排的话
[15:02] Did we have something we were supposed to do? 我们不是有事情要做吗
[15:03] Something about an up-and-coming authors symposium? 非常重要的作者讨论会
[15:05] Oh, yeah. 是的
[15:06] Oh, shoot. Well, I guess we could ask — 讨厌 我想我们叫上…
[15:08] No, no, no! We’re in! 不不不 我们去
[15:09] Okay, great. Hey, I’ll text you the address. 很好 我回头把地址发你
[15:11] – Great. – All right. -太好了 -好的
[15:13] An overnighter. 过一夜
[15:14] This is the way relationships are cemented. 这是巩固关系的办法
[15:16] Would it be lame if I wore a T-shirt in the hot tub? 如果我泡热水浴时穿T恤是不是很土鳖
[15:18] Yeah. 对
[15:23] I think she’s probably had enough sugar. 我想她吃太多糖了
[15:29] I know it’s just a kid-free night 我知道这只是在新地方
[15:31] with new friends in a new place, 和新朋友过一个没孩子的晚上
[15:32] – but I’m super-excited. – Me too. -但我超级兴奋 -我也是
[15:33] Are these good lounge-around- the-ski-lodge pants, 这是在滑雪小屋闲逛的长裤
[15:36] or do they look too much like pajamas? 还是太像睡衣
[15:37] They’re good. But wear underwear. 很好 记得穿内裤
[15:39] Reduce floppage. 小弟不会太晃动
[15:40] Yes. 对
[15:41] I refuse to feel guilty for missing Anna-Kat’s reading tonight. 我拒绝为错过今晚安娜凯特的故事会而内疚
[15:43] We have a responsibility to ourselves, 我们对自己也有责任
[15:46] to our relationship, 还有我们的关系
[15:47] to the Gods of Spontaneous Marital Morning Sex. 对随意的夫妻晨间爱爱也有责任
[15:50] I love those guys. I love you guys! 我爱那两个人 我爱你们
[15:52] Half of the parents in this town 这里的一半父母
[15:54] spend zero time with their kids. 从来不陪孩子
[15:55] Then they put on this big show by going to every last school event, 但他们会参加学校的每次活动
[15:58] like that makes them good parents. 好像这样他们就是好家长了
[15:59] That’s what they do. 他们就是这样的
[16:00] That’s totally what they do. 完全就是
[16:01] They’re like, “Ooh! I’m such a good mother! 她们会说 我真是一个好妈妈
[16:03] The nanny feeds them, the maid cleans up after them, 保姆喂他们吃饭 女佣为他们打扫
[16:05] but I’m here at the stupid Kid Lit Festival.” 但我在这里参加愚蠢的儿童读书节
[16:07] “Ooh, I’m an awesome dad, 我是个非常好的爸爸
[16:09] I play 72 holes of golf a week 我一周打72洞的高尔夫
[16:10] and read texts when my kids are trying to talk to me, 孩子们想和我说话时 我在看短信
[16:13] but look at me now! 但看我现在
[16:14] I’m in the front row, 我在前排
[16:15] taping the whole thing on my phone 用手机全录下来了
[16:16] like I’m not a total douche.” 好像我不是一个彻底的混蛋
[16:18] And that’s not parenting. 这不是家长之道
[16:20] It most certainly is not. 当然不是
[16:22] Parenting is the daily grind of caring for kids 做家长是每天照顾孩子
[16:24] while doing the painstaking work of shaping their character. 而且要辛苦地培养孩子们的性格
[16:26] That’s what we do. 这正是我们做的
[16:28] That’s all we do, Greg. 我们做的就是这些 格雷格
[16:29] That is our entire life. 这就是我们全部的生活
[16:30] In fact, one could argue that by skipping this event, 事实上 可以说我们不去参加故事会
[16:32] we’re teaching Anna-Kat a lesson in independence. 我们给安娜凯特上了一堂独立课
[16:34] Yes. 对
[16:35] By going away, we’re actually being there for her more than if we stayed. 我们离开 比留在那里更能支持她
[16:38] I buy that. 我相信
[16:40] So, for real, what happens when Anna-Kat’s onstage 说真的 安娜凯特上台后
[16:41] and looks out in the audience and we’re not there? 发现我们不在观众席上会怎样
[16:43] She’ll be fine. 她不会有事的
[16:44] We’ll buy her ice cream with extra toppings, 我们给她买加馅料的冰淇淋
[16:45] and she’ll get over it. 她就会忘掉的
[16:46] So you’re saying 你是说
[16:47] for the price of a couple of crumbled-up Oreos, 用一些捏碎的奥利奥饼干
[16:49] we can reclaim our lives? 我们就能找回我们的生活
[16:50] I’m in! 我加入
[16:53] We good to go? 可以走了吗
[16:55] Yeah. Everything’s packed. 对 都打包好了
[16:56] Angela’s gonna take the kids to the Lit assembly 安吉拉送孩子们去参加故事会
[16:58] and stay the night. 她晚上在我们家睡
[17:00] And I told the kids that their great aunt passed, 我告诉孩子们姑婆去世了
[17:01] and we had to go to the funeral. 我们得参加葬礼
[17:03] How many great aunts is that now? 到现在死了几个姑婆了
[17:05] I think I’m up to seven, and they still haven’t noticed. 我想七个了 他们还没发现
[17:09] We’re on our way, 我们要出发了
[17:10] and we don’t feel guilty at all, do we? 完全不觉得内疚 对吗
[17:11] Now floor it! 快走
[17:15] We’re having such an amazing time! 我们非常开心
[17:17] – Wish you were here! – Cheers! -真希望你们也在 -干杯
[17:22] Remember driveway us? 记得车道上的我们吗
[17:23] They had it all figured out. 他们全想清楚了
[17:24] Highway us, 高速公路上的我们
[17:26] that’s where it all started to crumble. 一切开始崩溃
[17:27] …And so, the two rabbits sat down at the table 于是 两只兔子坐在桌旁
[17:31] and shared the carrot. 分享胡萝卜
[17:32] The end. 讲完了
[17:35] Well, that was awful. 太糟糕了
[17:37] Still, we did the right thing. 我们做了正确的事
[17:39] Although the zebra had stripes 尽管斑马身上有条纹
[17:41] and the leopard had spots, 美洲豹有斑点
[17:43] they decided they could still be friends. 它们决定还是能做朋友
[17:45] The end. 讲完了
[17:50] Still think we did the right thing? 还是觉得我们做了正确的事吗
[17:55] The sun told the cloud to stop crying. 太阳让云别哭了
[17:57] It did. 云不哭了
[17:58] Then all the children of the world 全世界所有的孩子
[18:00] came out to play. 都出来玩了
[18:01] The end. 讲完了
[18:06] Everyone having a good time? 大家开心吗
[18:09] I sure am. 我很开心
[18:11] Please welcome Anna-Kat Otto. 请欢迎安娜凯特·奥图
[18:21] Once upon a time, 很久以前
[18:23] when America was a young nation, 美国还是年轻的国家
[18:25] a family of pioneers 一家先锋
[18:26] decided to take a risk and head West, 决定冒险向西部进发
[18:29] into the new frontier… 进入新的边疆
[18:31] You are so going to that concert with your friends. 你和朋友去演唱会去定了
[18:35] Once the flesh-eating bacteria took over the camp, 吃肉细菌占领帐篷后
[18:37] no one was safe. 没人是安全的
[18:39] Those who died were actually the lucky ones. 那些死了的人其实是幸运的
[18:41] Those who didn’t were so hungry 那些没死的人太饿了
[18:43] they had no choice 他们别无选择
[18:44] but to eat their family members… 只能吃家里人
[18:46] …and not even dandelions 就连蒲公英
[18:48] would grow over their graves. 都不会在他们坟上生长
[18:54] The end. 讲完了
[18:59] You’re so not going to that concert with your friends. 你别想和朋友去听演唱会
[19:06] Are you kidding me with that story? 那个故事是个笑话吗
[19:08] What were you two thinking? 你俩在想什么
[19:09] We tried to pitch her bunnies. 我们想让她接受兔子
[19:11] Yeah, but then she got mad 然后她生气了
[19:12] and made us work through dinner. 让我们晚餐时继续写
[19:13] Am I the only one who thought it went well? 只有我觉得写得不错吗
[19:17] As much as I want to blame them, 虽然我很想怪他们
[19:19] which I really, really want to do, 我的确很想
[19:20] the truth is, 但事实是
[19:21] – this is on us. – I know. -这是我们的错 -我知道
[19:23] We were so caught up enjoying our kid-less life 我们沉迷于和没孩子的朋友
[19:24] with our kid-less friends, 享受没孩子的生活
[19:26] we took our eyes off the ball. 我们走神了
[19:27] I’m glad we came to our senses. 我很高兴我们恢复了理智
[19:28] Did you see Anna-Kat’s face 安娜凯特看向观众席
[19:30] when she looked out in the audience and saw we were there? 看到我们时 你看到她的表情了吗
[19:32] Yeah. 看到了
[19:33] Maybe Highway Us knew what they were doing. 也许高速公路的我们知道自己在做什么
[19:35] 75% of parenting is doing stuff you don’t want to do. 做父母75%的时候在做自己不想做的事
[19:37] I think it’s closer to 90%. 我想接近90%
[19:39] Good news is, once they’re out of the house, 好消息是 他们离开家后
[19:41] and it’s just the two of us again, 就只剩我们了
[19:42] we know we’ve still got it. 我们知道我们依然能行
[19:44] Damn right we do. 那是当然
[19:47] You guys can still have it, just hide it. 你们能行 但要躲着行
[19:51] 95% 95%.
[19:53] Maybe higher. 也许更高
[20:03] So we’re just going to come right out and tell them the truth — 我们就这样跟他们说出实话吗
[20:06] – we have kids. – Yep. -我们有孩子 -对
[20:08] And if they want to break up with us, 如果他们想分手
[20:09] we’re not gonna beg. 我们不会乞求
[20:13] Listen, we are so sorry we had to cancel with you the last minute. 听我说 非常抱歉我们临时取消
[20:16] We had something we wanna to tell you but we want to do in person. 我们有事想当面跟你们说
[20:20] No no, us first. 不 我们先说
[20:23] – We’re pregnant! – We’re pregnant! -她怀孕了 -我怀孕了
[20:25] My god. 我的天
[20:27] Amazing. 太棒了
[20:31] – We have to celebrate! – Definitely. -我们得庆祝 -当然
[20:32] Yes. 太棒了
[20:36] No way are we gonna be friends with a couple with a newborn. 我们绝对不可能和刚生孩子的夫妻做朋友
[20:37] “Look, guys, the baby discovered its feet!” 看 伙计们 宝宝刚刚发现了他的脚
[20:40] Bo-ring! 无聊
美式主妇

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美式主妇(American Housewife)剧集台词目录:

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