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美式主妇(American Housewife)第3季第12集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月10日 By jubentaici_movie_user 美式主妇(American Housewife)第3季第12集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10
S01E11
S01E12
S01E13
S01E14
S01E15
S01E16
S01E17
S01E18
S01E19
S01E20
S01E21
S01E22
S01E23
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10
S02E11
S02E12
S02E13
S02E14
S02E15
S02E16
S02E17
S02E18
S02E19
S02E20
S02E21
S02E22
S02E23
S02E24
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
S03E09
S03E10
S03E11
S03E12
S03E13
S03E14
S03E15
S03E16
S03E17
S03E18
S03E19
S03E20
S03E21
S03E22
S03E23
S04E01
S04E02
S04E03
S04E04
S04E05
S04E06
S04E07
S04E08
S04E09
S04E10
S04E11
S04E12
S04E13
S04E14
S04E15
S04E16
S04E17
S04E18
S04E19
S04E20
S05E01
S05E02
S05E03
S05E04
S05E05
S05E06
S05E07
S05E08
S05E09
S05E10
S05E11
S05E12
S05E13
时间 英文 中文
[00:04] Mecca lecca hi mecca hiney ho! 看我变变变
[00:08] Ta-da! 请看
[00:09] Uh, I can see the tissues under your arm. 我看到纸巾在你胳膊下
[00:12] What are you doing? 你做什么
[00:13] You’re supposed to ignore that, 你应该无视它
[00:15] act amazed, and reward me with an ice cream sandwich. 装作惊讶 奖励我冰淇淋三明治
[00:18] You are not six anymore. 你不再是六岁了
[00:19] You are going to have to try harder to amaze me. 你要想让我惊讶就得更用心
[00:21] Just a heads-up, I’m staying for dinner. 提醒一下 我会留下吃晚餐
[00:23] These are my food allergies. 这是我的过敏清单
[00:26] Oh, come on. 走吧
[00:27] – Should I get these boots, Mom? – Sure. -我应该买这种靴子吗 妈 -当然
[00:29] I assume they’re a gift for a new friend 我想这是给新朋友的礼物
[00:30] who’s also a hooker. 而且她是妓女
[00:32] So you’re not gonna get them for me? 所以你不会给我买
[00:33] No way. Why would you wear open-toed boots? 不可能 你为什么要穿露趾靴子
[00:36] Boots are a cold-weather item. 靴子是冬天用品
[00:38] Next you’ll want… 接下来你会要
[00:39] a down jacket without any sleeves. 没有袖子的羽绒服
[00:41] You mean a vest? 羽绒背心吗
[00:43] Oh, yeah, bad example. 例子不对
[00:44] I’ve done everything you’ve asked of me. 你要我做的我都做了
[00:46] I joined the school musical. 我参加了学校音乐剧
[00:47] I’m taking the PSAT. 我参加了学业能力初步测验
[00:49] Can’t you just meet me halfway 你就不能迁就我一下
[00:50] and reward me for all my hard work? 奖励我的辛苦努力吗
[00:52] How about I meet you right here 不如我就迁就我
[00:53] and don’t give you jack squat? 啥也不给你买
[00:54] I’m so tired of you shutting me down all the time. 我厌倦了你总是拒绝我
[00:56] I am your mother. 我是你妈
[00:58] Shutting you down is in my job description. 拒绝你是我的工作
[01:00] Just like you rolling your eyes at me 就像你冲我翻白眼
[01:02] is in your job description. 是你的工作一样
[01:05] You’re very good at your job! 你的工作做得很好
[01:14] Oliver, why don’t you stay 奥利弗 你不如留下
[01:16] and help me build Luthor’s new doghouse? 帮我搭建卢瑟的新狗屋
[01:18] It’ll be a fun father-son project. 这是很有趣的父子活动
[01:19] We just did a father-son project. 我们刚进行了父子活动
[01:21] We carried an unbuilt doghouse from the car to the backyard. 我们把没搭建的狗屋从车上搬到了院子里
[01:24] – I’ll always remember it, Dad. – Come on. -我会终生不忘的 爸 -拜托
[01:26] We’ll listen to music, work a couple hours, 我们听音乐 工作几小时
[01:28] take a break, make some hummus. 休息一下 做点鹰嘴豆泥
[01:30] I have to finish reading the new Johnny Diamond book 我得看完强尼·戴蒙德的新书
[01:32] before I go to his motivational seminar this weekend. 周末我得去参加他的励志研讨会
[01:35] Johnny Diamond says, 强尼·戴蒙德说
[01:36] “In order to earn people’s trust in business, 为了在做生意时赢得别人的信任
[01:38] you need to make a bond with them 你需要和对方建立感情
[01:40] by any means necessary.” 不惜一切代价
[01:42] Johnny Diamond. 强尼·戴蒙德
[01:43] That’s not a very authentic way to interact with people. 这不是与人互动的可信办法
[01:45] Neither is making hummus. 做鹰嘴豆泥也一样
[01:51] Look at these stupid boots 看这些蠢靴子
[01:53] Taylor wants me to buy her. 泰勒要我给她买
[01:55] Yikes. 妈呀
[01:56] And why are they open-toed? 为什么是露脚趾的
[01:57] Boots are a cold-weather item. 靴子是冬天用品
[01:58] That’s what I said! 我也是这样说的
[02:00] It’s like socks without the feet. 这就像是没脚部的袜子
[02:02] – You mean leg warmers? – Damn it. -你是说护腿吗 -见鬼
[02:04] It’s really hard to come up with a similar example 真难想出和这些愚蠢靴子
[02:05] to those dumb boots. 相似的例子
[02:07] Taylor was pretty mad when I said no. 我拒绝后泰勒很生气
[02:09] We’ve been fighting a lot lately. 我们最近经常吵架
[02:11] We’re just not connecting like we used to. 我们没有以前感情那么好了
[02:13] Same with me and Oliver. 我和奥利弗也一样
[02:14] He doesn’t want anything to do with me. 他不想和我有任何关系
[02:16] I bought a doghouse for us to build together. 我买了狗屋就是为了和他一起搭
[02:18] What teenage boy wouldn’t want to do that? 有哪个少年不愿意做这个
[02:19] Every teenage boy in the history of teenage boys. 少年历史上的每个少年
[02:22] I just feel like as he gets older, 我只是觉得他长大了
[02:24] we have less and less in common 我们的共同点越来越少
[02:25] and it’s harder to spend any quality time with him. 很难和他开心在一起
[02:27] Then maybe you should do something with Oliver 那也许你应该和奥利弗做一些
[02:29] that Oliver is interested in. 他感兴趣的事
[02:30] I can’t do another drive through the neighborhood 我不能再在社区开车
[02:32] where I play “Guess That Zestimate.” 玩什么房产估价
[02:34] How about that Johnny Diamond seminar 强尼·戴蒙德的研讨会怎么样
[02:36] that he won’t shut up about? 他一直在说这事
[02:38] That guy’s such a phony. 那家伙就是个骗子
[02:39] It’s all recycled self-help nonsense. 全是些循环自助的废话
[02:41] I’d rather bond over something real. 我宁愿通过现实一点的东西增进感情
[02:43] Look, if you’re the one who wants to bond, 如果你是要增进感情的那个人
[02:44] then you have to be the mature one and make the sacrifice. 那你必须成熟一点 做出牺牲
[02:47] Fine! 好的
[02:48] I’ll go to the Johnny Diamond seminar with him. 我会和他一起去参加强尼·戴蒙德的研讨会
[02:50] You know, maybe you should take your own advice 也许你应该接受你自己的建议
[02:52] and make a sacrifice with Taylor so you two can bond. 为泰勒做出牺牲 这样你们可以增进感情
[02:54] What did I say about undermining me in front of the kids? 关于别在孩子面前让我下不来台 我是怎么说的
[02:57] – But the kids aren’t — – Anna-Kat! -但孩子不在 -安娜凯特
[02:59] What? 什么
[03:01] Thank you, honey. 谢谢你 亲爱的
[03:02] Good night. 晚安
[03:09] Who the hell wants toeless boots? 谁会想要露脚趾的靴子
[03:11] Yeah, it makes no sense. It’s like — 完全没道理 就像
[03:13] Don’t even try. I was at this for hours last night. 别费劲了 我昨晚想了几小时
[03:15] Thought I had one, but I didn’t. 以为想到了 结果没有
[03:16] Turns out a hat with no top is just a visor. 原来没顶的帽子就是鸭舌帽
[03:18] Are you thinking of caving in on this? 你打算屈服吗
[03:20] I’m worried Taylor has started seeing me as the enemy. 我担心泰勒开始把我当敌人
[03:25] I just love that necklace on you. 你戴这项链真漂亮
[03:27] Thank you. I think it will look even better on you. 谢谢你 我觉得你戴更漂亮
[03:30] How did I get so lucky? 我怎么这么幸运
[03:34] Why can’t Taylor and I be like that? 为什么我和泰勒不能像这样
[03:36] You can. My kids and I are that close. 你可以 我和孩子们就很亲近
[03:38] We hug six times a day. 我们一天拥抱六次
[03:40] Ugh! What a load of garbage! 真是一堆废话
[03:42] Parents and children need boundaries! 家长与孩子间需要底线
[03:43] Otherwise, they won’t fear or respect you. 否则 他们不会害怕也不会尊重你
[03:45] No, I disagree. 不 我不同意
[03:47] I let my kids do whatever they want 我的孩子们想做什么都行
[03:48] as long as I’m there to supervise. 只要有我监督就行
[03:50] And it will be the same 他们长大后
[03:51] when they get older. If they want to have sex, 也是一样 如果他们想上床
[03:52] they can do it at my house while I’m home. 他们可以在我家做 我在家就行
[03:54] There has to be a middle ground between lifelong bitterness 在恨你一辈子和听孩子上床之间
[03:56] and listening to your kids hump. 肯定有折中
[03:58] You know, I read in Parenting magazine 我在家长杂志上看到
[04:00] that mothers and daughters go on friend dates now to bond. 现在母女会进行朋友约会增进感情
[04:03] It’s a fun way to spend time together. 这是共度时光的有趣方式
[04:04] No judgments, and you get to establish a new relationship 不准批评 你们可以建立新关系
[04:07] where you see each other as equals. 双方是平等的
[04:08] Hey! More garbage! 更多废话
[04:10] You know, Greg said I should do something 格雷格说我应该
[04:12] like mother-daughter date night. 进行母女约会之夜
[04:14] But ideas just sound better coming from someone else. 但别人提的意见似乎更好
[04:17] I don’t know, Katie. You’ll be setting a dangerous precedent 不好说 凯蒂 你会开创危险的先例
[04:19] that could lead to your kids coming back to visit 有可能导致孩子们在搬出去后
[04:20] after they’ve already moved out. 还回家看望你
[04:22] That’s exactly what I want. 我就希望这样
[04:24] Yep, that’s what you think now. 这是你现在的想法
[04:25] But imagine yourself 30 years older 但想象30年后
[04:28] and your kids are yelling at you in your own home 你的孩子在你家里吼你
[04:30] for watching TV because screens are bad for the baby. 因为你看电视 而屏幕对宝宝不好
[04:32] I’m watching “Game of Thrones,” 我在看《权力的游戏》
[04:34] and so is the baby! 宝宝也在看
[04:36] They need to learn about violence 他们要学会暴力
[04:38] and love. 还有爱
[04:41] All right. Oliver’s on board with me 好了 奥利弗同意
[04:43] going to the Johnny Diamond seminar with him. 我和他一起参加强尼·戴蒙德研讨会
[04:45] Actually, he said, “It might ruin it but maybe it won’t.” 其实他说的是也许会毁了体验也许不会
[04:47] – I’m taking that as a win. – That’s great. -我当这是胜利 -太好了
[04:49] And Doris and Angela said I should ask out Taylor 多瑞丝和安吉拉说我应该带泰勒
[04:51] on a mother-daughter date and buy her the open-toed boots. 进行母女约会 给她买露脚趾的靴子
[04:54] Isn’t that exactly what I told you to do? 这不正是我告诉你的吗
[04:56] You want me to be the kind of wife 你希望我做那种
[04:57] that “Listens” To her husband? 听老公话的老婆吗
[04:59] Then we’re gonna have to change this whole operation. 那所有操作就要变了
[05:01] I should go read up on Johnny Diamond. 我得去看强尼·戴蒙德的书
[05:03] I’ll start with his first book, 从他的第一本开始
[05:04] “The Best of Johnny Diamond.” 《最佳强尼·戴蒙德》
[05:05] How can his first book be “The Best of Johnny Diamond”? 第一本书怎么能是《最佳强尼·戴蒙德》
[05:07] You think that’s strange, his next book is called 你以为这算奇怪吗 第二本叫做
[05:09] “Introducing Johnny Diamond.” 《介绍强尼·戴蒙德》
[05:14] Hey, there. 你好
[05:15] Taylor, huh? Pretty name. 泰勒吗 好名字
[05:17] Do you spell it with a “Y”? 拼写中有个Y吗
[05:19] Good trick, huh? 好戏法吧
[05:22] That’s not a trick. 这不是戏法
[05:23] This is a trick. 这才是戏法
[05:29] Witch. 女巫
[05:32] Why were you talking to yourself? 你为什么自言自语
[05:34] I’m practicing asking Taylor on a friend date. 我在练习邀请泰勒参加朋友约会
[05:36] Ever since my parents’ divorce, 我父母离婚后
[05:38] my mom takes me on friend dates every Saturday. 我妈每周末都带我进行朋友约会
[05:40] It’s a lot of Arby’s. 经常去快餐店
[05:43] Let me help you. 让我帮你
[05:44] Thanks, but I think I got it. 谢谢 但我想我能行
[05:47] You can’t ask her out in person. 你不能当面约她
[05:49] You have to do it over text. 你得发短信
[05:51] Okay. 好
[05:53] What should I write? 我应该怎么写
[05:55] Just be casual. 随意一点
[05:59] What’s up, girl? 好吗 姑娘
[06:01] Is this a mistake? 你发错了吗
[06:07] Just seeing if you wanna chill. 就想看看你想不想出去玩
[06:10] This feels like a trap. 感觉像陷阱
[06:13] How about boot shopping and coffee? 买靴子喝咖啡怎么样
[06:25] Yes! 太好了
[06:30] What? 怎么了
[06:31] You’re helping her get closer to your sister? 你帮她和你姐姐亲近
[06:34] Not good for you. 对你不好
[06:36] Why? You think I’m getting pushed out as the favorite kid? 怎么 你觉得我会不再是最受宠的
[06:38] Maybe. I don’t think you can get by 也许 我觉得你靠装可爱
[06:40] on just cuteness anymore. 已经不行了
[06:42] The big teeth are in now. 都换大牙了
[06:44] You’re gonna have to find a new way 你得找到新办法
[06:45] to make your parents like you. 让父母喜欢你
[06:46] How? 怎么做
[06:48] You ever want to take a bite out of your ChapStick? 你想过咬护唇膏吗
[06:51] Oh, Franklin. You almost made it through 富兰克林 你差一点一次完整对话中
[06:52] one full conversation. 没犯傻
[07:10] Where my Diamond Dogs at?! 我的钻石狗在哪里
[07:19] Let’s maximize those relationships, D-Dogs. 让我们将关系发挥到极致 钻石狗们
[07:22] That’s why you’re here! 所以你们来这里
[07:29] I want you to turn to the person next to you 我要大家转向你旁边的人
[07:33] and talk with them. 和他们说话
[07:35] And when I say “Talk with them,” 我说的和他们说话
[07:37] I mean connect with them! 意思是与他们建立联系
[07:42] No small talk! 不要聊天
[07:44] I want you to ask them the best thing 我要你问对方这周
[07:48] that happened to them this week. 碰到的最开心的事是什么
[07:50] Get real! 现实一点
[07:52] My Diamond Dogs need to gnaw through the lies 我的钻石狗需要咬断谎言
[07:55] and taste the truth. Leashes off! 品尝真实 狗链松开了
[08:04] We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. 如果你不想 我们不用这样做
[08:06] No, no, no. We should do the work. 不 我们要照做
[08:07] – That’s what we’re here for. – Okay. -这是我们来这的原因 -好的
[08:09] What was the best thing that happened to you this week? 你这周碰到的最开心的事是什么
[08:12] Well, um, 好吧
[08:14] there’s this girl I like at school 在学校有个我喜欢的女生
[08:16] that sat with me at lunch. 午餐时坐在我旁边
[08:18] I didn’t have the guts to ask her out, 我没勇气约她出去
[08:19] but at least I know she knows I exist. 但至少我知道她知道我的存在
[08:23] That’s the first time you’ve mentioned a new girl 这是你和吉娜分手后
[08:25] since you and Gina broke up. 第一次提到女生
[08:26] I’m proud of you. 我为你骄傲
[08:28] Thanks, Dad. 谢谢你 爸
[08:30] We usually don’t talk about this kind of stuff. 我们通常不会谈这些东西
[08:31] Or any stuff really. 或任何东西
[08:32] This is nice. 感觉真不错
[08:36] What was the best part of your week? 你这周最开心的事是什么
[08:37] – Is it too cheesy to say right now? – Definitely. -说是现在太俗气吗 -当然
[08:40] Then I’m gonna go with the apple fritter I had this morning. 那就是我今早吃炸苹果饼
[08:42] Now howl if you had a substantial emotional breakthrough. 如果你有了实质性的情感突破就嚎叫吧
[08:55] You want to maximize your relationship with me? 你想把和我的关系发挥到极致吗
[08:58] Uh, sure. 当然
[09:01] Ask me the best part of my week. 问我这周最开心的事是什么
[09:03] Okay, what was the best part of your week? 好 你这周最开心的事是什么
[09:04] This. Right now. 就这个 现在
[09:07] It’s too cheesy for your son there, but not for me, man. 你儿子觉得俗气 我不觉得
[09:09] Come here. Bring it in here. 过来抱抱
[09:12] We should hang out or something, huh? 我们应该一起玩
[09:13] Get some tacos later. 等下去吃玉米饼
[09:21] Oh, my God, Mom. I love them. 天啊 妈 我好喜欢
[09:22] They look painful. 好痛苦的样子
[09:24] Well, sometimes the coolest stuff 有时候最酷的东西
[09:25] – isn’t the most comfortable. – That’s true. -穿上去并不舒服 -没错
[09:27] I might have made some fashion choices when I was your age 我在你这个年纪做出的有些时尚选择
[09:29] that weren’t based on comfort. 也不是出于舒适
[09:30] Like? 比如说
[09:31] Tight chokers were big in the ’90s. 90年代非常流行勒脖项链
[09:34] I passed out from time to time, 我时不时地晕倒一下
[09:35] but Mama looked fine as hell. 但老娘可美了
[09:38] You should try on a pair of these. 你应该试一双
[09:39] Open-toed boots? I don’t think so. 露趾靴子 还是算了吧
[09:42] I’ve been nursing my pedicure since Christmas. 从圣诞节开始我就自己美甲了
[09:45] Although I did a touch-up with a red Sharpie yesterday. 不过昨天我用红色记号笔补了色
[09:47] I think you can pull them off. 我觉得你穿会很漂亮
[09:49] You think? 真的吗
[09:55] Gotcha. 扶住你了
[09:58] So, do you want to grab coffee? 你想喝杯咖啡吗
[10:00] Actually, let’s grab lunch. 我们去吃午餐吧
[10:02] Play it cool. Play it cool. 冷静 冷静
[10:04] Whatever. 随便
[10:05] Okay. Never mind. 好吧 算了
[10:06] Darn it. That was too cool! 见鬼 太冷了
[10:08] No, no, no. Let’s grab lunch. 不 我们去吃午餐
[10:15] All right, Diamond Dogs. 好了 钻石狗
[10:17] It’s time for one last relationship maximizer. 到了最后一项关系极致化
[10:20] Classic trust fall. 经典的信任倒
[10:21] – Come on, Dad. Let’s do it. – Okay. -爸 我们来 -好
[10:23] Oh, no. No, no. 不对
[10:24] For this fall, 你们这一倒
[10:25] I want Dad to fall and Sonny Boy to catch him. 爸爸倒 儿子接
[10:32] No, we can’t do that. 我们不能这样做
[10:34] If Johnny says we can do it, we can do it. 如果强尼说我们能做到 我们就能做到
[10:36] – I trust us. – It’s not about trust. -我相信我们 -这不是相信的问题
[10:38] It’s about me being way heavier than you. 而是我比你重很多
[10:39] Did I mention the apple fritters this morning? 我说了今早吃的炸苹果饼吗
[10:41] Full disclosure — I have those every morning. 我得坦白 我每早都吃
[10:43] If we can do this, we can do anything! 如果我们能做到这个 就没有什么事做不到
[10:50] Okay. 好吧
[10:55] I got you, Dad! 我接住你了 爸
[10:57] Yes, you do! I’ll never doubt you again, Oliver! 是的 我再也不会怀疑你了 奥利弗
[11:00] I don’t know where this strength is coming from! 我不知道这股力量是从哪里来的
[11:02] It’s like when a parent lifts a car off their baby. 就像家长抬起压住宝宝的车
[11:04] It’s love, man! 是因为爱
[11:12] All right, that’s it for this seminar. 好了 研讨会到此结束
[11:15] But remember, Diamond Dogs, 但记住 钻石狗
[11:17] the seminar hasn’t actually ended. 研讨会并没有结束
[11:20] It’s just begun. 而是刚刚开始
[11:22] Who wants homework?! 谁要做作业
[11:27] I want you to go home, find a loved one, 我要你们回家后 找到爱的人
[11:31] and do a project together 一起做一项活动
[11:32] ’cause this isn’t just about your relationship, right? 因为这不仅仅是关于你们的关系
[11:36] This is about your relationship… 而是你们的关系
[11:39] with your relationship! 和你们关系的关系
[11:44] Dad, I know what we should do. 爸 我知道我们要做什么
[11:45] – We should build Luthor’s doghouse. – Yeah! -一起搭建卢瑟的狗屋 -对
[11:47] We’ll build a Diamond Doghouse together. 我们一起搭建钻石狗屋
[11:50] Excuse me, Mr. Diamond. 打扰下 戴蒙德先生
[11:51] I was skeptical about coming today, 我本来对今天来这里很怀疑
[11:53] but you’ve helped my son and me very much. 但你帮了我和我儿子很多
[11:55] – Thank you. – Well, that’s what it’s all about. -谢谢 -这就是重点
[11:58] It’s not about the $200 tickets 重点不是200块的票
[11:59] or the $50 T-shirts. 50块的T恤
[12:01] It’s about this moment. 重点是这一刻
[12:03] Me touching your face. 我摸着你的脸
[12:06] You nervous? 你紧张吗
[12:07] – Kind of. – Smart. -有点 -聪明
[12:09] We don’t validate parking. 我们没有停车票
[12:13] He’s amazing, isn’t he? 他真棒 不是吗
[12:15] His hands are so soft. 他的手好软
[12:16] Should we buy Diamond Dog lotion? 我们要买钻石狗护手乳液吗
[12:18] Yeah! 当然
[12:24] So, what’s going on? 出什么事了
[12:25] You hitting me up for a kidney? 你是要我捐肾吗
[12:27] – What? – You bought me shoes you hate, -什么 -你给我买了你讨厌的靴子
[12:29] and we’re eating at a restaurant where you don’t have to fill up 我们吃饭的餐厅 你不必自己
[12:31] your own cup at the soda machine, 去汽水机那里接汽水
[12:32] so something’s up. 所以肯定有事
[12:34] I just want to spend quality time with you, 我只想和你共度美好时光
[12:36] not just as mother and daughter. 不仅是母女
[12:38] – I want to be friends. – Okay. -我想做朋友 -好
[12:40] So, like, how do we do that? 怎么做呢
[12:43] We can start by talking like girlfriends. 我们可以像闺蜜一样说话
[12:46] Let’s spill some tea. 我们说点秘密
[12:47] What’s the hot goss at school? 学校有哪些热门八卦
[12:49] I’m not sure what topics are on the table. 我不知道要说什么话题
[12:51] I don’t want to say too much and then you come down on me. 我不想说太多你骂我
[12:53] How about I go first and break the ice 不如我先说打破僵局
[12:54] and share some high school stories of my own? 分享一些我的高中故事
[12:59] Can’t tell that story. 这事不能说
[13:02] Really can’t tell that story. 真的不能说这事
[13:04] I’ll get straight-up arrested if I tell that story. 如果讲这事我就会被捕的
[13:07] Okay. When I was a junior, 好吧 我还是少女时
[13:10] I dated two brothers at the same time, 同时和一对兄弟约会
[13:12] but neither of them knew. 但他们都不知道
[13:14] – Wh– Mom! – But I got busted -妈 -我被抓个现行
[13:17] when one of them saw me making out with the other one 其中一个看到我和另一个接吻
[13:20] when we went off-campus to smoke. 当时我们逃学去抽烟
[13:21] Wow! That is so crazy! 太疯狂了
[13:26] I didn’t know you smoked. 我不知道你抽烟
[13:27] Just a little. It was high school. 一点点 高中嘛
[13:29] I tried vaping over the summer. 我暑假时试过电子水烟
[13:33] You’re her friend, not her mom. 你是她朋友 不是她妈
[13:34] You’re her friend, not her mom. 你是她的朋友 不是她妈
[13:36] This is some good gossip. 有则劲爆八卦
[13:37] So there’s a girl in the musical 音乐剧中有个女生
[13:38] who had to quit because her boyfriend — 必须辞演 因为她男友
[13:40] You know, vaping is the same as smoking. 电子水烟和抽烟是一样的
[13:42] I know. Anyway, 我知道 总之
[13:43] he made her quit because he was jealous — 他让她辞演 他嫉妒
[13:44] So did you buy your own vape pipe? 你自己买的烟枪吗
[13:46] It’s called a vape pen. 那叫蒸发器
[13:47] And no, I used someone else’s. 不 我用的别人的
[13:49] So anything could have been in there — 所以里面有可能什么都有
[13:51] tobacco, pot, rat poison. 烟草 大麻 老鼠药
[13:53] You could have died! 你可能会死
[13:55] Wait, I thought we were trying to be friends. 慢着 我们不是要做朋友吗
[13:56] It sounds like you’re momming me right now. 听起来你又在当妈教训我了
[13:58] That’s because I am a mom! 因为我是你妈
[13:59] Do you know how dumb it is to vape? 你知道抽电子水烟有多愚蠢吗
[14:03] You just literally told me you smoked in high school! 你刚告诉我你高中时抽烟
[14:05] I know, but my mother wasn’t involved in my life. 我知道 但我妈从来不管我
[14:08] I’m up your ass constantly! 我一直管着你
[14:09] I knew this was a trap. 我就知道这是陷阱
[14:11] You tricked me into admitting stuff 你骗我说我们是朋友
[14:13] by saying we were friends! 骗我坦白
[14:14] Well, that won’t be a problem anymore 这不再是问题了
[14:15] because we’re no longer friends. 因为我们不再是朋友
[14:17] I think that’s a world record for the shortest friendship. 这是最短友谊的世界纪录
[14:18] – A whopping 20 seconds! – Great! -整整20秒 -很好
[14:20] You can go celebrate with a big, fat vaping session. 你可以去盛大的电子水烟大会庆祝
[14:23] – No one says that! – Ugh! I’m out of here. -没人这样说 -我走了
[14:25] Now you’re definitely not getting my kidney! 现在你绝对得不到我的肾
[14:27] I don’t want your kidney. And even if I did, 我不要你的肾 就算我需要
[14:29] I don’t want it because it’s full of vape! 我也不要 因为上面全是电子水烟
[14:31] That’s not how it works! 本来就是这样
[15:01] It says attach piece 1 to piece 2. 这上面说1号板连2号板
[15:04] But the pieces aren’t labeled. 但板上没有标号
[15:05] This is a waste of time. 真是浪费时间
[15:06] Remember what Johnny Diamond says. 记得强尼·戴蒙德说的吗
[15:08] When you drift to the negative, SBH — 出现负面情绪时 停呼嚎
[15:11] Stop, Breathe, Howl. 停下 呼吸 嚎叫
[15:16] – What the hell are you doing? – We’re Diamond Dogs, honey. -你们在做什么 -我们是钻石狗 亲爱的
[15:18] We’re maximizing our relationship 我们将关系发挥到极致
[15:20] and forging a lifelong bond. 打造终生的感情
[15:22] Great. You’re both in a cult. 很好 你们加入了邪教
[15:24] I look forward to your six-part Netflix series. 我期待看到以你们为主角的Netflix六集纪录片
[15:26] How was your friend-date with Taylor? 你和泰勒的朋友约会怎么样
[15:27] Terrible. 糟透了
[15:28] – I think we broke up. – You’re mother and daughter. -我想我们分手了 -你们是母女
[15:31] You can’t break up. You just have to figure out 你们不能分手 你必须想清楚
[15:32] the relationship you want to have with her. 你想和她拥有什么样的关系
[15:33] I think I know what you guys need 我想我知道你们要做什么
[15:35] to maximize your relationship. 将你们的关系极致化
[15:37] Johnny Diamond has some exercises 强尼·戴蒙德有一些练习
[15:38] to help you fulfill your potential. 可以帮你们发挥你的潜力
[15:40] I don’t like this pairing. 我不喜欢你们这对组合
[15:42] Disturbs me. 令我不安
[15:45] Hey. Come on. 来吧
[15:48] Let’s go post this on Johnny Diamond’s Facebook page. 发到强尼·戴蒙德的脸书页上
[15:51] Hashtag building a hashtag doghouse #搭建#狗屋
[15:54] with my hashtag son 和我#儿子
[15:56] for our hashtag other hashtag Diamond Dogs. 为我们的#另一#钻石狗
[15:59] # Hashtag.
[16:01] Trying to stay positive, Dad, 我也不想消极 爸
[16:02] but you’re misusing hashtag to an alarming degree. 但你对#的滥用已经到了令人担心的程度
[16:05] Oliver, all these people are posting reports 奥利弗 这些人都在发报道
[16:06] that Johnny Diamond got arrested. 强尼·戴蒙德被捕了
[16:08] – What? – The FBI raided his ranch in Utah. -什么 -联调局突袭了他在犹他州的农场
[16:11] He had people being held against their will writing his books. 他强迫别人给他写书
[16:13] Okay, so he’s a busy guy. 他是个大忙人
[16:15] He had to outsource a little labor. 他必须外包一些工作
[16:16] And he had children making his merchandise. 他让孩子们给他制造商品
[16:18] You’re making a child build a doghouse. Think on that. 你让一个孩子搭建狗屋 想想看
[16:21] He sold all his followers’ identities. 他出卖所有追随者的身份
[16:23] My credit score! 我的信用积分
[16:24] This guy sucks so hard. 这家伙太可恶了
[16:26] Oliver, we don’t need Johnny Diamond. 奥利弗 我们不需要强尼·戴蒙德
[16:28] We can maximize our relationship by ourselves. 我们可以自己将关系发挥到极致
[16:30] Dad, I can’t believe I’m saying this, 爸 我不敢相信我这么说
[16:33] but Johnny Diamond’s a fraud. 但强尼·戴蒙德是个骗子
[16:35] Which means our entire bond is built on a lie. 就是说我们的感情建立在谎言上
[16:39] It’s over. 结束了
[16:43] My high school bully is dead. 我高中时的恶霸死了
[16:47] Here’s some ideas so your parents can like you again. 这里有一些让你父母再次喜欢你的主意
[16:50] – Can you cook? – No. -你会做饭吗 -不会
[16:52] Can you tell the future? 你能预知未来吗
[16:54] If I could, I would have walked out of the room 如果我能 我就会在20秒前
[16:56] before you farted 20 seconds ago. 你放屁之前离开房间
[16:58] Oh, you can be the funny one of the family. 你可以做家里搞笑的那个
[17:01] You need to learn a dirty joke. Adults love those. 你要学会下流笑话 大人们喜欢那些
[17:03] Okay. 好
[17:06] “Good dirty jokes.” 很棒的下流笑话
[17:10] I don’t get that. 不明白
[17:11] I don’t get that. 不明白
[17:13] Oh, that one has a funny word. 这个里面的词很好笑
[17:14] Oh, yeah. 对
[17:16] Okay, I’ll learn it and tell it to my parents later. 好 我学会了稍后讲给爸妈听
[17:18] I should not have eaten that ChapStick. 我不应该吃那支护唇膏
[17:26] Why are you throwing that shirt out? 你为什么扔掉T恤
[17:29] I thought Johnny Diamond was your hero. 强尼·戴蒙德不是你的英雄吗
[17:30] He’s a fraud. He got busted for, like, 10 felonies, 他是个骗子 他被抓个现行犯了十项罪行
[17:33] so all his advice to help me succeed is meaningless. 那些帮助我成功的建议根本没意义
[17:44] You know, you are always looking for someone to worship. 你总是在找让自己崇拜的人
[17:48] Well, look outside. 看外面
[17:54] See that guy? 看那个人
[17:55] That’s the guy that you should worship. 你应该崇拜他
[17:59] He went out of his way to try to connect with you. 他尽全力和你增进感情
[18:02] You should do the same. 你也应该这样做
[18:13] It’s really unfortunate 太遗憾了
[18:15] when I have a great parenting moment, 我当妈当得这么出色的时刻
[18:16] and Greg is not here to give me credit. 格雷格没在这里表扬我
[18:19] So, uh, 那个
[18:21] that was pretty weird 蛮奇怪的
[18:23] today when we went… 今天我们
[18:28] I’m trying to have an awkward moment with you, Taylor. 我在和你进行尴尬的对话 泰勒
[18:30] Okay. Fine. 好的
[18:34] I’m sorry that I blew up at you, 抱歉冲你发脾气
[18:36] but when you screw up, I have to come down on you. 但你做错时 我必须骂你
[18:38] – It’s my job. – You’re very good at your job, Mom. -这是我的工作 -你的工作做得非常好 妈
[18:40] You’re gonna have a lot of friends in your life, 你这一生会有很多朋友
[18:42] but only one mother. 但只有一个妈
[18:44] And I refuse to give that role up. 我拒绝放弃这一角色
[18:46] But you’re the one who wanted to be friends. 但是你想做朋友的
[18:47] And one day we will be, but right now, 总有一天我们会是朋友 但现在
[18:50] I need you to be afraid of me, 我需要你怕我
[18:52] but know, if you’re ever out in the world 但要知道 如果你在外面
[18:54] and find yourself in a bad situation, 发现自己身处困境
[18:55] you can call me and I’ll come get you. 你可以打我电话 我会来救你
[18:58] – No questions asked? – No. -不问问题 -不
[19:00] Like a thousand questions asked. 问无数的问题
[19:05] – What’s up? – Anna-Kat has a joke -什么事 -安娜凯特有个笑话
[19:07] – she wants to tell us. – Great. -想讲给我们听 -太好了
[19:09] Okay, so three guys are shipwrecked on an island 三个人乘船出事流落到岛上
[19:11] and are captured by locals. 被当地人抓住了
[19:12] Their leader says to the first guy, 首领对第一个人说
[19:14] “You must choose: death or ooga-mooga,” 你必须选择 死还是乌嘎木嘎
[19:17] so the first guy says, “I choose ooga-mooga.” 第一个说 我选择乌嘎木嘎
[19:19] Then they throw him down… 然后他们把他扔进…
[19:35] So after seeing what happened to the first two guys, 看到前两个人的遭遇后
[19:37] the third guy says, “I choose death,” 第三个人说 我选择死
[19:40] and the leader says, “Okay. 首领说 好
[19:42] Death by ooga-mooga!” 死于乌嘎木嘎
[19:45] Franklin, do you even get the joke? 富兰克林 你听懂这个笑话了吗
[19:47] She said “Ooga-mooga.” 她说了乌嘎木嘎
[19:49] Anna-Kat, that was filthy. 安娜凯特 太恶心了
[19:51] What would possess you to tell a joke like that? 你为什么要讲这样的笑话
[19:55] I was afraid I was losing my position 我害怕我不再是家中
[19:56] as the favorite in the family, 最受宠的孩子
[19:58] so I thought maybe I could be the funny one. 所以我想我可以做搞笑的那个
[20:00] Honey, you’re always going to be the baby, 亲爱的 你永远是最小的那个
[20:03] so you always are going to be the favorite. 所以你永远是最受宠的
[20:05] That’s just a fact. 这是事实
[20:08] You got me all crazy. 你让我发疯了
[20:09] You are super grounded for looking up that joke online. 你在网上查这种笑话 你被禁足了
[20:12] Go to your room. 回你房间
[20:17] Can someone drop me off at Arby’s? 能送我去快餐店吗
[20:19] I have a date with my mom. 我要和我妈约会
[20:23] Can you set Anna-Kat’s parental control 你能给安娜凯特设置家长监控
[20:25] so it blocks all the dirty stuff? 拦截所有黄色内容吗
[20:26] I’ll also block that weird website she likes 我还会屏蔽那个她喜欢的网站
[20:28] that shows death row inmates’ last meals. 专播死囚最后一餐饭的
[20:31] That… 那个
[20:33] was a really funny joke. 真是个好笑的笑话
[20:34] Ooga-mooga. 乌嘎木嘎
[20:42] Luthor says, “Great job, boys!” 卢瑟说 做得好 小伙子们
[20:46] Oliver, Johnny Diamond might have ended up being a fake, 奥利弗 虽说强尼·戴蒙德是个骗子
[20:48] but the fun I had bonding with you wasn’t fake at all. 但我和你增进感情享受的乐趣不是假的
[20:51] I’m glad your mom forced us to finish it. 我很高兴你妈逼我们完成狗屋
[20:52] Yeah, me, too. 我也是
[20:53] I’m starting to get what you see in her. 我开始明白你看上她什么了
[20:58] You guys need help building anything else? 你们还需要帮忙搭建什么吗
[21:00] No thanks. Here you go. 不用 谢谢 给你
[21:01] You don’t have to pay me. 你不用给我钱
[21:02] We’re Diamond Dogs! 我们是钻石狗
美式主妇

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美式主妇(American Housewife)剧集台词目录:

在线阅读
S01E01
S01E02
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S01E06
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S01E16
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S01E20
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S01E22
S01E23

在线阅读
S02E01
S02E02
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S02E06
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S02E20
S02E21
S02E22
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S02E24

在线阅读
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
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S03E14
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S03E16
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S03E18
S03E19
S03E20
S03E21
S03E22
S03E23

在线阅读
S04E01
S04E02
S04E03
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S04E11
S04E12
S04E13
S04E14
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S04E16
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S04E18
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S04E20

在线阅读
S05E01
S05E02
S05E03
S05E04
S05E05
S05E06
S05E07
S05E08
S05E09
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S05E11
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