| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Second Breakfast. | 第二顿早餐 |
| [00:01] | My safe place, | 我的安全港湾 |
| [00:02] | a place I can complain about my husband and bitch about my children. | 我可以在这里抱怨丈夫 吐槽孩子 |
| [00:05] | It’s cheaper than therapy, and there’s pancakes. | 这可比心理治疗便宜 还有煎饼吃 |
| [00:08] | And there are my best friends, who listen to me, | 那两位是我最好的朋友 她们会倾听我 |
| [00:10] | give me advice, and keep me from driving my car into the lake. | 给我建议 让我不至于驾车入湖自杀 |
| [00:13] | What am I talking about? The kids are too big now. | 我在胡说些什么呢 现在孩子们都太大了 |
| [00:16] | They will just wrestle the steering wheel away from me. | 他们会从我手里把方向盘扳过去 |
| [00:19] | I have a big problem. | 我遇到一个大麻烦了 |
| [00:21] | Oliver’s taller than me. | 奥利弗比我还高了 |
| [00:25] | – Are you guys listening? – Yeah, yeah. Yeah. | -你们有在认真听吗 -在听 在听 |
| [00:26] | Anna-Kat’s weird. Oliver likes money. | 安娜凯特很古怪 奥利弗喜欢钱 |
| [00:28] | I didn’t say any of that. | 我根本没提到这些 |
| [00:30] | Taylor’s dumb? | 是泰勒很蠢的事吗 |
| [00:30] | No! Oliver is taller than me! | 不是 奥利弗现在比我还高了 |
| [00:33] | I like to look down at him when I’m yelling. | 我吼他的时候 喜欢向下俯视他 |
| [00:35] | “Because I said so” doesn’t have the same impact | 现在我仰望他的鼻孔 对他吼”因为我说了要这样” |
| [00:38] | when I’m staring up at his nostrils. | 似乎没有那么强烈的震慑效果了 |
| [00:41] | I know. | 我懂 |
| [00:42] | Hello?! | 在听吗 |
| [00:43] | I’m workshopping a problem here. | 我在阐述一个麻烦呢 |
| [00:45] | Sorry, we’re a little distracted. | 抱歉 我们有点分心了 |
| [00:46] | Oh, Angela’s hot new girlfriend, Jane, | 安吉拉的性感新女友简 |
| [00:48] | has an even hotter brother named Charlie. | 有个比她更性感的哥哥叫查理 |
| [00:51] | We went fancy bowling last night. | 我们昨晚去打保龄球了 |
| [00:52] | Jane scored a perfect game. | 简打得超棒 |
| [00:54] | And Charlie scored big, too! Up top! | 查理也打得超棒 来击个掌 |
| [00:58] | You had a fun night. | 你们昨晚玩得很开心 |
| [00:59] | Glad we covered that. So, Oliver — | 很高兴这事聊完了 话说 奥利弗… |
| [01:01] | You know, Charlie and Doris really hit it off. | 话说 查理和多瑞丝 真的很来电 |
| [01:03] | Oh, he hit it, all right. | 他的确很会放电勾引人 |
| [01:04] | Boom-shaka-laka! | 棒棒哒 |
| [01:07] | You think you’re going on a second date? | 你觉得你们会进行第二次约会吗 |
| [01:08] | Oh, yeah. We’re gonna go hiking with them tomorrow morning. | 当然啦 我们明早要跟她们一起去徒步 |
| [01:11] | We might be a little late for Second Breakfast. | 明天的第二顿早餐 我们可能会迟到 |
| [01:13] | Late?! | 迟到 |
| [01:14] | You’re late for your kid’s music recital, | 孩子的音乐演奏会你可以迟到 |
| [01:15] | not Second Breakfast! | 第二顿早餐可不能迟到 |
| [01:17] | This is important. | 这是很重要的 |
| [01:18] | How about you come hiking with us? | 不如你跟我们一起去参加徒步吧 |
| [01:19] | – Yeah. – Absolutely not. | -就是啊 -绝对不要 |
| [01:21] | Hiking is on my “No” List. | 徒步在我的”拒绝”清单上 |
| [01:22] | No hiking, no nutmeg, no fake-ass veggie meat. | 不徒步 不吃肉豆蔻 不吃假到爆的素肉 |
| [01:25] | But I remember you saying you liked it. | 但我记得你曾经说过你很喜欢啊 |
| [01:28] | Before I knew I was being tricked. | 那是在我知道我被骗了之前 |
| [01:31] | Delicious, fake-ass veggie meat. | 美味却假到爆的素肉 |
| [01:40] | Hey, guys. How was school? | 你们好啊 在学校怎么样 |
| [01:42] | Terrific. | 棒极了 |
| [01:47] | Mustard?! | 竟然放芥末 |
| [01:48] | Well, I’m sorry you don’t like the mustard on my sandwich. | 你不喜欢我三明治上的芥末 可真是抱歉了 |
| [01:51] | Don’t be sorry. Just don’t do it again. | 不用道歉 只是下次别这么干了 |
| [01:53] | Dad, I had an awesome day. | 爸 我今天超开心 |
| [01:55] | We got our Popsicle-stick project assignments. | 老师让我们做冰棍棒的手工项目 |
| [01:57] | I got Fort Trumbull. | 我分到的是做特伦布尔堡 |
| [01:58] | Fort Trumbull! Built in 1777! | 特伦布尔堡 建于1777年 |
| [02:00] | A fortification to protect the government of Connecticut! | 一个用于保护康涅狄格州的军事工程 |
| [02:02] | How exciting! | 真是激动人心 |
| [02:04] | Popsicle-stick projects are a milestone in any child’s life. | 冰棍棒手工项目是任何孩子人生中的里程碑 |
| [02:06] | Taylor, remember the Popsicle-stick | 泰勒 还记得我们一起做的 |
| [02:07] | Brooklyn Bridge we made together? | 冰棍棒布鲁克林大桥吗 |
| [02:09] | Nope. | 不记得 |
| [02:10] | And, Oliver, remember we had such a blast | 奥利弗 还记得当年我们一起做出了 |
| [02:11] | making our Popsicle-stick U.N. Headquarters? | 冰棍棒联合国总部有多开心吗 |
| [02:13] | Nope. | 不记得 |
| [02:14] | Well, I got an “A” on both of them. | 这两个项目我都拿到了A |
| [02:16] | I’m gonna go do some research. | 我该去做些研究了 |
| [02:18] | Well, this is gonna be great! | 这一定会很棒的 |
| [02:19] | And your mom called me a weirdo | 你妈当年还骂我是怪胎 |
| [02:21] | because I had people from work bring in their used Popsicle sticks. | 因为我让同事把家里吃完的冰棍棒都带给我 |
| [02:24] | You know they sell them at Michaels for, like, | 你知道商店是有专门卖冰棍棒的吧 |
| [02:25] | one dollar for a thousand. | 一美元可以买一千根 |
| [02:29] | I did not. | 我还真不知道 |
| [02:30] | – Hi! – Hi, honey. | -嗨 -嗨 亲爱的 |
| [02:33] | Ooh, a snack! | 有点心啊 |
| [02:36] | Mustard. Who likes mustard? | 芥末 谁会喜欢芥末啊 |
| [02:38] | I do! The guy who made the sandwich! | 我喜欢 做这个三明治的人喜欢 |
| [02:40] | I’m gonna eat this in my office. | 我拿去办公室吃算了 |
| [02:44] | Wait, come back here. Let’s go back-to-back. | 等等 回来 我们背靠背比一下 |
| [02:46] | Again? | 又比吗 |
| [02:48] | Taylor, who’s taller? | 泰勒 谁更高些 |
| [02:50] | Oliver. Still. | 还是奥利弗 |
| [02:51] | Damn it! | 该死的 |
| [02:52] | I’ve outgrown you, woman. Deal with it. | 我已经长得比你高了 女人 接受现实吧 |
| [02:54] | Go pick up Luther’s poop in the front yard. | 去前院把卢瑟的屎捡一下 |
| [02:56] | Are you punishing me for being taller than you? | 你是为我比你高的事在惩罚我吗 |
| [02:58] | Yes, I am. | 没错 正是 |
| [02:59] | And now I’m punishing you for pointing out how ridiculous that is. | 现在我要为你指出这事有多荒谬而惩罚你 |
| [03:03] | It’s Taylor’s turn to pick up poop. | 今天轮到泰勒收拾狗屎了 |
| [03:04] | No way! I did it yesterday! | 不可能 我昨天才收拾的 |
| [03:06] | Oh, look who thinks she can keep track of days now. | 瞧瞧谁觉得自己现在可以记住日子了 |
| [03:08] | Okay. Here’s how it’s gonna go down — | 好了 那这么办 |
| [03:10] | both of you are doing it together for the rest of the week. | 这周剩下的日子 都是你们一起捡狗屎 |
| [03:13] | That is so unfair! | 那也太不公平了吧 |
| [03:14] | Well, you should have thought about that before | 你在让你弟弟长得比我高之前 |
| [03:15] | you let your brother get taller than me. | 就该想到这点的 |
| [03:17] | You’re insane. | 你简直是疯了 |
| [03:18] | I’m a mother of three! Of course I’m insane! | 我是三个孩子的妈 我当然疯了 |
| [03:28] | So, I’ve boiled and sterilized my coworkers’ Popsicle sticks. | 我把我同事们吃的冰棍棒都煮过消毒了 |
| [03:31] | You know you can get them at Michaels for like — | 你知道在商店是可以直接买到现成的… |
| [03:32] | I know. I’ve heard. | 我知道 我听说了 |
| [03:34] | Next, we draw up a blueprint. | 下一步 我们要画个蓝图 |
| [03:35] | I’ll need a dozen sharpened pencils, | 我需要一打削尖的铅笔 |
| [03:37] | a few yards of waterproof vellum paper, | 几码防水牛皮纸 |
| [03:39] | and one Oreo. | 再加一袋奥利奥饼干 |
| [03:41] | Not for the project. | 不是为项目准备的 |
| [03:42] | I’ve just been good today. | 我今天心情好 |
| [03:43] | Thanks for your help, Dad, but I got this. | 谢谢你的帮助 爸 但我一个人可以的 |
| [03:46] | You want to make the fort by yourself? | 你想一个人做这个堡垒吗 |
| [03:48] | But we were such a good team when we made | 但我们之前用德国鸡蛋面 |
| [03:50] | our Berlin Wall out of German egg noodles. | 搭建柏林墙明明合作得很愉快啊 |
| [03:52] | Which look just like normal egg noodles, but we knew. | 虽然看着跟普通鸡蛋面一样 但我们知道那是柏林墙 |
| [03:54] | We knew. | 我们知道 |
| [03:56] | I can’t say no to that face. | 我真是无法拒绝你这副可怜的面孔 |
| [03:58] | Such soft, delicate features, | 如此柔软 柔和的特征 |
| [04:00] | like an old, sick woman. | 跟疾病缠身的老太太一样 |
| [04:06] | It’s your turn, and you know it. | 轮到你了 你心里也清楚 |
| [04:08] | Boy, first thing in the morning, you look like… | 天呐 你大早上看上去就像… |
| [04:11] | well, what we’re putting in these bags. | 就像这些袋子里的垃圾 |
| [04:13] | Me? Look at you. | 有脸说我 看看你自己吧 |
| [04:15] | Nice shirt. | 上衣真不错 |
| [04:16] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [04:17] | Some guy shot me in the face with it at a Knicks game. | 我去看尼克斯队的比赛时 有人对我吼了这句 |
| [04:27] | Wait, was that the…? | 等等 那是… |
| [04:28] | Street Pics Car? | 街景拍摄车 |
| [04:30] | They just took our picture! | 我们刚刚被拍摄了照片 |
| [04:32] | But my clothes! | 但我穿得这么邋遢 |
| [04:35] | My hair! | 我的头发这么乱 |
| [04:37] | We’re gonna look like this on Street Pics forever! | 在街景照片上 我们会永远是这鬼样子 |
| [04:39] | We actually look worse than the house, | 我们比这房子还难看 |
| [04:41] | which I didn’t think was possible. | 我以前还以为这是不可能的呢 |
| [04:42] | We need to find that car | 我们得找到那辆车 |
| [04:43] | and make sure that photo never sees the light of day. | 确保那些照片永远不会被人看见 |
| [04:45] | What are we gonna do? Run after it? | 我们要怎么做 追车吗 |
| [04:46] | In my panda slippers? | 我还穿着熊猫拖鞋呢 |
| [04:47] | – Think of something! – You think of something! | -想想办法啊 -你怎么不想 |
| [04:50] | Oh, wait, I’ll think of something. | 对哦 你没脑子 那我来想吧 |
| [04:57] | Okay if we borrow these chairs? | 能借用一下这些凳子吗 |
| [04:58] | Actually, they’re taken. | 其实这里是有人坐的 |
| [05:00] | My friends are just running late. | 我的朋友们只是来晚了 |
| [05:01] | They should be here any minute. | 她们随时会到 |
| [05:08] | I’m not alone. | 我不是一个人 |
| [05:09] | I’m just waiting for my friends. | 我只是在等朋友 |
| [05:14] | Are your kids taller than you? | 你的孩子们比你高吗 |
| [05:19] | 我们之前没信号了 无法通知你 我们来不了了 还在爬山 抱歉 明天见 | |
| [05:24] | Hi. Are you here by yourself? | 你好 请问你是一个人吗 |
| [05:27] | Apparently I am. | 显然是啦 |
| [05:29] | But I guess if you would like to join… | 但如果你们想跟我一起坐… |
| [05:33] | This is a downside to how popular I was in high school. | 高中时期的班宠 如今竟然沦落到被人嫌 |
| [05:36] | I am completely unprepared for this situation. | 我对这种惨况完全没心理准备 |
| [05:38] | Do I flip the table or just leave? | 我该掀桌发飙吗 还是默默离开 |
| [05:41] | Just leave. | 默默离开好了 |
| [05:44] | And…done! | 完成了 |
| [05:46] | Fort Trumbull is complete! | 特伦布尔堡落成 |
| [05:48] | Let’s wait for the glue to dry, | 我们等胶水干透 |
| [05:49] | and I’ll paint the cardboard to look more like a lawn. | 我去把纸板涂成绿色 看起来更像草坪 |
| [05:51] | Or — and here’s a really great idea — | 或者 我有个好提议 |
| [05:54] | we put fake grass down to make it look more authentic. | 我们放假草进去 使之看起来更真实 |
| [05:56] | I think I just want to paint it. | 我觉得涂色就行了 |
| [05:57] | I used fake grass on Oliver’s project, | 我帮奥利弗做的手工就用过假草 |
| [05:59] | and we got extra credit. | 我们得到了额外加分 |
| [06:00] | His teacher said it was “Well done” And “Unnecessary.” | 他老师给的评价是”干得好”和”没必要” |
| [06:03] | Painting is fine. | 涂色就行啦 |
| [06:04] | It’ll look way better with turf. | 用草皮会好看很多 |
| [06:05] | Besides, it gives me a reason to go to the Hobby Shop. | 再说了 这让我有理由去一趟「爱好小店」 |
| [06:07] | I like to go to the miniature section | 我喜欢到微型区那边 |
| [06:08] | and pretend I’m a giant. | 假装自己是巨人 |
| [06:10] | It really brings the store down. | 那让整个店显得完全不是对手 |
| [06:15] | They dumped me for a stupid hike with Jane and Charlie. | 她们居然为了跟简和查理去爬山 放我鸽子 |
| [06:19] | I have things I have to talk to them about — | 我有重要的事要跟她们说啊 |
| [06:21] | Oliver getting taller, “The Bachelor.” | 奥利弗长高了 《单身汉》的内容 |
| [06:22] | You can talk to me. | 你可以跟我说啊 |
| [06:24] | I can’t talk to you about “The Bachelor.” | 我才不要跟你聊《单身汉》 |
| [06:25] | You’re all, “Who’s paying for all these dates? | 你只会说”这些约会都是谁付账啊 |
| [06:27] | The helicopter budget alone must be insane.” | 光是租直升机的费用就贵死了”之类的蠢话 |
| [06:30] | You ruin it, Greg. | 你把气氛都毁了 格雷格 |
| [06:31] | I’m just saying, | 我就是想说 |
| [06:32] | one day the helicopters won’t be there. | 将来在一起生活 肯定没有直升机 |
| [06:34] | And what is this couple left with? | 到时那对爱侣只剩下什么 |
| [06:36] | Hard marital work. | 艰难的现实婚姻 |
| [06:39] | How could Doris and Angela stand me up? | 多瑞丝和安吉拉怎么能放我鸽子 |
| [06:43] | Second Breakfast is sacred! | 第二顿早餐可是很神圣的 |
| [06:46] | I know it sucks you got stood up, | 我知道你被放了鸽子很不爽 |
| [06:47] | but it sounds like you might be overreacting. | 但听起来你好像反应过度了 |
| [06:48] | You know, if it weren’t for you, | 要不是因为你 |
| [06:49] | I wouldn’t be in this situation. | 我也不会陷入这个惨况 |
| [06:51] | With Angela and Doris? | 你指安吉拉和多瑞丝的事吗 |
| [06:52] | No, with Oliver. | 不是 是奥利弗 |
| [06:54] | You’re tall, now he’s getting tall. | 你是高个儿 现在他也拼命长高 |
| [06:57] | I should have married Bobby Hudson. | 早知道我就嫁给鲍比·哈德逊了 |
| [06:59] | Who? | 谁 |
| [07:00] | My high-school boyfriend. He’s 5’6″. | 我高中时的男朋友 他只有1米67 |
| [07:02] | He would have guaranteed me Hobbit children. | 嫁给他 我肯定能生出霍比特小矮孩 |
| [07:06] | Okay, instead of taking your frustrations out on me, | 好了 你与其拿我撒气 |
| [07:08] | why don’t you tell Doris and Angela | 不如告诉多瑞丝和安吉拉 |
| [07:09] | how you feel about them standing you up? | 你被她们放鸽子的感受 |
| [07:11] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [07:13] | I am gonna give them a taste of their own medicine | 我要以其人之道还治其人之身 |
| [07:15] | and teach them what it feels like to be replaced. | 让他们知道被取代的滋味 |
| [07:17] | That’s not what I said. | 我说的可不是这意思 |
| [07:19] | I realize that, | 我知道 |
| [07:20] | but I smartened you up in my head. | 但我在脑海里给你增智了 |
| [07:21] | You’re welcome. | 不用谢 |
| [07:27] | These are the top ten most humiliating images caught by Street Pics. | 这些是”街景图片”抓拍到的十大丢人画面 |
| [07:31] | This could be us. | 我们也可能上榜 |
| [07:35] | What kind of person keeps a Hello Kitty | 什么样的怪咖才会在自家院子里 |
| [07:36] | Nativity scene in their front yard? | 放凯蒂猫版的耶稣诞生场景啊 |
| [07:38] | The same kind of person who wears an “I farted. So what?” T-shirt. | 就是会穿印着”我放屁了 那又怎样”T恤的那种人 |
| [07:42] | Like you should talk. | 你也有脸说 |
| [07:43] | You looked like a Troll doll from the opioid crisis collection. | 你当时看着就像嗑药过量的的巨怪娃娃 |
| [07:46] | That picture of us could be on the Internet forever. | 我们的照片可能会永远留在网上 |
| [07:49] | If Cooper’s helicopter can’t locate the Street Pics guy, | 如果库珀的的直升机找不到拍街景照的那个人 |
| [07:51] | we’ll have to move off the grid. | 我们就得搬家消失 |
| [07:53] | Somewhere we catch our own rainwater | 搬去一个我们得自己接雨水 |
| [07:54] | and drink our own urine. | 并且喝自己尿的地方 |
| [07:56] | Why would we have to drink our own urine if we have rainwater? | 既然有雨水 我们为什么要喝自己的尿 |
| [07:59] | We just do, okay? | 反正就是要喝 别问了 |
| [08:03] | You know who would win the award for | 你们知道谁会赢得 |
| [08:05] | loudest chewing of a banana? | “吃香蕉最大声”奖吗 |
| [08:07] | Greg. | 格雷格 |
| [08:09] | I stopped buying bananas, | 我已经不买香蕉了 |
| [08:10] | but he now steals them from work. | 但他现在居然把公司的香蕉偷回家 |
| [08:12] | What’s happening? | 这是什么情况 |
| [08:13] | Did you know that Greg adjusts the mirrors | 你们知道格雷格每次坐进他的车 |
| [08:15] | every time he gets in his car? | 都要调整后视镜吗 |
| [08:17] | What does he think changed? | 他以为会有什么变化啊 |
| [08:18] | Why are you calling Dad “Greg”? | 你为什么叫爸爸”格雷格” |
| [08:20] | Is this because Doris and Angela ditched you? | 是因为多瑞丝和安吉拉放了你鸽子吗 |
| [08:22] | Are you trying to make us your breakfast friends? | 你是想把我们变成你的早餐八卦朋友吗 |
| [08:24] | No. No, no, no, no, no. | 不不不 当然不是啦 |
| [08:26] | Greg got up to pee four times last night, | 昨晚格雷格起床去尿了四次 |
| [08:28] | and it wouldn’t be that bad, | 本来那还好 |
| [08:29] | but every time he got back in the bed, | 但他每次躺回床上 |
| [08:30] | it was like a hippopotamus flopping down next to me. | 都像只河马一样重重地摔在我旁边 |
| [08:33] | Stop badmouthing Dad! | 别再说爸爸的坏话了 |
| [08:34] | He’s nice, and he taught me how to ride a bike. | 他人很好 他还教会了我骑自行车 |
| [08:36] | All right, let’s move on. | 好吧 那说别的 |
| [08:38] | My kids, they’re kind of the worst. | 我的孩子们 他们最讨厌了 |
| [08:42] | Cooper’s helicopter located the Street Pics car. | 库珀的直升机找到拍街景图那人的车了 |
| [08:44] | It’s in downtown Fairfield. | 就在费尔菲尔德县中心 |
| [08:45] | Let’s go. We have to make him retake the photo. | 走吧 我们一定要让他重拍一张 |
| [08:47] | Have a great day! Make good choices! | 祝你们今天愉快哦 要做明智的选择 |
| [08:50] | Stop growing! | 别再长个儿了 |
| [09:02] | You’re the “I farted. So what?” Guy! | 你就是”我放屁了 那又怎样”小哥 |
| [09:04] | We need to talk to you. | 我们得跟你谈谈 |
| [09:05] | You’re Rat’s Nest Poop Shovel! | 你就是耗子窝铲屎官 |
| [09:08] | Listen, we need you to come back to our house | 听着 我们需要你回我们家那边 |
| [09:09] | and retake the photo. | 重新拍一张照片 |
| [09:12] | We don’t do that. | 我们不搞那一套 |
| [09:13] | But you have to. | 但你必须重拍 |
| [09:14] | That’s not how I want to be remembered. | 我不想被别人记住那个糗样 |
| [09:16] | I want to be remembered for doing something great, | 我希望别人记住的是我的伟大成就 |
| [09:17] | like curing cancer or winning “Dancing With the Stars.” | 比如治愈癌症或拿到《与星共舞》的冠军 |
| [09:21] | Okay, I’ll circle back and retake it. | 好吧 我会兜回去重拍一张 |
| [09:23] | Yes! Thank you! | 太好了 谢谢你 |
| [09:24] | On one condition. | 但我有一个条件 |
| [09:25] | Fine, my sister will go on a date with you. | 行吧 我姐姐可以跟你约会一次 |
| [09:28] | No. I want that fancy Westport belt. | 不 我想要那条高档的西港皮带 |
| [09:30] | No deal. | 没门 |
| [09:31] | This Ferragamo belt means more to me than | 这条菲拉格慕皮带对我来说 |
| [09:33] | any member of my family. | 比任何家人都更重要 |
| [09:35] | It’s either the belt or looking stupid on the Internet forever. | 要么留住皮带 要么在网上永远留下蠢样 |
| [09:40] | Can’t you just go out with my sister? | 你就不能和我姐去约会吗 |
| [09:42] | She just got that vaccine. | 她刚打过疫苗了 |
| [09:43] | Shut up! | 你闭嘴 |
| [09:44] | It’s the belt or no reshoot. | 给我皮带 否则不重拍 |
| [09:55] | All right! | 好吧 |
| [09:57] | I’ll come by at some point. | 我会抽时间过去一趟的 |
| [09:59] | When, exactly? | 具体什么时候 |
| [10:00] | Oh, I can’t give you a specific time. | 我给不了具体时间 |
| [10:02] | Do you want a four-hour window? | 你们想知道一个四小时的窗口期吗 |
| [10:03] | Yeah. | 好啊 |
| [10:04] | I can’t give you that either. | 那我也给不了 |
| [10:06] | Bye! | 再见 |
| [10:11] | We have to stay inside at all times. | 我们得一直待在屋里 |
| [10:14] | And if we do go outside, we have to be | 如果一定要出来 那必须穿上 |
| [10:16] | our best-dressed just in case he’s driving by. | 我们最好的衣服 以防他过来 |
| [10:18] | Ferragamo! | 菲拉格慕 |
| [10:34] | It’s so crazy that we’re dating a brother and a sister. | 真是太疯狂了 我们竟然在和一对兄妹约会 |
| [10:37] | I know. | 就是啊 |
| [10:38] | Wait, is that gross or hot? | 等等 这算变态还是性感 |
| [10:39] | Oh, it’s hot. | 绝对是性感 |
| [10:40] | Now, if they were twins, it would be gross. | 如果他们是龙凤胎 那就变态了 |
| [10:42] | It’s a real fine line with this stuff. | 这种事的区别只在一线之间 |
| [10:46] | Katie cancelled. | 凯蒂取消了 |
| [10:48] | On bottomless raspberry-lemonade day? | 在无限量覆盆子柠檬水之日吗 |
| [10:51] | That’s strange. | 太奇怪了 |
| [10:54] | All right, besties, welcome to Second Breakfast! | 好了 好友们 欢迎来到第二顿早餐 |
| [11:02] | You think she’s mad ’cause we went hiking yesterday? | 你觉得她是因为我们昨天去徒步而生气吗 |
| [11:04] | She’s mad that hiking is a thing, so, yeah, probably. | 她是因为真有徒步这回事而生气 或许是吧 |
| [11:11] | Just got back from the Hobby Shop. | 刚从「爱好小店」回来 |
| [11:13] | Some other guy wanted this roll of perennial rye, | 有个别的顾客想要这个多年生黑麦 |
| [11:15] | but I beat him out. | 但我打败了他 |
| [11:16] | I guess you could say we had a “Turf” war. | 可以说我们展开了一场草皮战[地盘战] |
| [11:19] | None of that happened. | 其实这都是假的 |
| [11:20] | I was just setting up a joke I thought of in the car. | 这是我在车里想出的笑话 |
| [11:23] | I said I didn’t need grass. | 我说了我不需要草 |
| [11:24] | Everyone says that until they see it. | 大家都这么说 直到他们看见实物 |
| [11:26] | Where’s the fort? | 堡垒呢 |
| [11:27] | I turned it in already. | 我已经交了 |
| [11:29] | It’s not due until Thursday. | 但周四才截止啊 |
| [11:31] | It was finished. | 已经完成了 |
| [11:32] | How could it be finished when I’m sitting here | 怎么可能完成呢 我手里还捏着一卷 |
| [11:33] | holding a roll of Connecticut perennial rye?! | 康涅狄格的多年生黑麦呢 |
| [11:35] | Trust me. It was good enough. | 相信我 已经够好了 |
| [11:37] | Good enough? Good enough?! | 够好了 够好了 |
| [11:39] | Dad, it’s my project. | 爸爸 那是我的手工项目 |
| [11:40] | Yeah, it’s your project, but you’re my project, | 没错 是你的手工项目 但你也是我的项目 |
| [11:42] | and if you’re willing to turn in some slapdash | 如果你愿意交一些马马虎虎 |
| [11:44] | grassless trash for class, then I’m failing. | 没有草地的垃圾作业 那就是我没及格 |
| [11:47] | And, yeah, my flow is sick! | 没错 我的说唱很酷 |
| [11:55] | Why is that funny? | 有什么好笑的 |
| [11:56] | My nicked colon is no laughing matter. | 我被切除的结肠可不是什么笑料 |
| [11:58] | It’s important that we look like we’re enjoying ourselves. | 我们必须看上去很开心 |
| [12:01] | Maria, why did you have to bring him? | 玛丽亚 你为什么要带他来 |
| [12:02] | I have news. We’re officially courting. | 我有消息要宣布 我们在正式交往了 |
| [12:05] | We now do everything together. | 现在我们做什么都一起 |
| [12:06] | – Except number two. – Yep. | -除了二号 -没错 |
| [12:09] | “Number two” is grocery shopping. | 二号是指购物 不是大便 |
| [12:10] | I prefer to do it myself. | 我喜欢一个人去 |
| [12:12] | Oh, good. They’re watching. | 太好了 她们在看 |
| [12:14] | Ablin, pretend like you’re having fun. | 阿布林 假装你玩得很开心 |
| [12:19] | Stop that! Maria, control your man! | 停下 玛丽亚 控制下你男人 |
| [12:22] | We don’t do stuff like that. | 我们不做这种事 |
| [12:24] | The point of Second Breakfast is to bond | 第二顿早餐的意义在于加深感情 |
| [12:26] | and air any grievances in your life. | 并说出自己生活中的不幸 |
| [12:28] | My mom fell and broke her hip and — | 我妈摔倒了 把屁股摔坏了 |
| [12:30] | Usually, we start with me. | 通常我先开始 |
| [12:32] | Have you ever had friends that don’t value loyalty or tradition?! | 你们有没有朋友不在乎忠诚或传统呢 |
| [12:38] | All of my ferrets have betrayed me. | 我的所有雪貂都背叛了我 |
| [12:41] | Ablin, keep telling that hilarious colon story. | 阿布林 还是说那个搞笑的结肠故事吧 |
| [12:44] | Okay, um, I became septic. | 好吧 我得了败血症 |
| [12:47] | The pain was so great that I actually begged them to kill me. | 实在太疼了 我不得不求他们杀了我 |
| [12:53] | Oh, hi. | 你们好啊 |
| [12:54] | Didn’t see you there. | 没看到你们也在 |
| [12:55] | Katie, why are you being like this? | 凯蒂 你为什么要这样 |
| [12:57] | I’m not being like anything. | 我没怎么样啊 |
| [12:58] | You have new people in your life, | 你们有了新朋友 |
| [13:00] | and I’ve got new people in mine. | 我也有新朋友 |
| [13:01] | We texted you. We were on a hike. | 我们给你发信息了 我们去徒步了 |
| [13:04] | We’re allowed to go hiking, Katie. | 我们是可以去徒步的 凯蒂 |
| [13:05] | In fact, we’re going again this afternoon. | 事实上 我们今天下午还要去 |
| [13:08] | Katie, we’re allowed to have lives outside of Second Breakfast. | 凯蒂 我们可以在第二顿早餐外拥有自己的生活 |
| [13:11] | I couldn’t agree more. I have one right here. | 我完全同意 我正在享受新生活呢 |
| [13:14] | Maybe Second Breakfast is getting in the way | 也许第二顿早餐阻挡了 |
| [13:17] | of these other fantastic lives we have. | 我们本可以拥有的其他精彩人生 |
| [13:19] | Really? Are you seriously doing this? | 不是吧 你真的要这样吗 |
| [13:21] | Oh, I’m doing it. | 我还就这样了 |
| [13:22] | This is my new table with my new friends, Maria and Abbie. | 这是我和新朋友的新桌子 玛丽亚和阿布 |
| [13:25] | – Okay. – Oh, well, if you want to be like that, fine. | -好吧 -如果你要耍性子 行吧 |
| [13:27] | Fine! | 行吧 |
| [13:34] | Then the morphine kicked in, and, uh, | 然后吗啡开始生效 |
| [13:36] | well, I got addicted to that. | 后来我就上瘾了 |
| [13:37] | Please stop. | 别说了 |
| [13:48] | Ohh, there you are. | 你在这呢 |
| [13:50] | I am done with Second Breakfast! | 我再也不吃第二顿早餐了 |
| [13:52] | Doris and Angela are starting new lives without me. | 多瑞丝和安吉拉开始了没有我的新生活 |
| [13:55] | Well, Anna-Kat finished her project without me. | 安娜凯特撇下我 独自完成了手工项目 |
| [13:58] | I mean, remember this one I did with Oliver? | 还记得我和奥利弗一起做的这个吗 |
| [14:00] | We made the Parthenon out of marshmallows. | 我们用棉花糖做了帕特农神庙 |
| [14:03] | And here’s Taylor’s toothpick Eiffel Tower. | 这是泰勒的牙签埃菲尔铁塔 |
| [14:08] | I lit it for Bastille Day. | 我在法国革命纪念日把它点亮了 |
| [14:10] | Working on these was so fun. | 做这些手工项目真的很有趣 |
| [14:11] | And now it’s over. | 但现在都结束了 |
| [14:14] | She was my last kid, | 她是我最后一个孩子 |
| [14:15] | with the last elementary-school project. | 最后一次小学手工项目 |
| [14:18] | Should we…? | 我们是不是该… |
| [14:19] | Have another baby? Sure! | 再生一个孩子 当然 |
| [14:21] | If you want to carry it. | 除非你来怀 |
| [14:23] | You know, if I could, I would. | 如果我可以 我非常乐意 |
| [14:24] | And I would do natural childbirth. | 而且我要顺产 |
| [14:25] | I’d want to feel it. | 我想感受那痛苦 |
| [14:26] | Oh, you’d feel it. | 你会感受到的 |
| [14:28] | Anna-Kat was 11 pounds. | 安妮凯特是个10斤重的大胖姑娘 |
| [14:29] | They had to rebuild my undercarriage | 医生不得不重塑我的产道 |
| [14:31] | with a scrunchy and part of my thigh. | 用的还是皮筋和我大腿的一部分 |
| [14:33] | Charming. | 真迷人 |
| [14:35] | Meanwhile, that 11-pound baby just handed in | 与此同时 那个10斤重的大宝贝刚背着我 |
| [14:37] | our project behind my back with cheap painted-on grass. | 交了一份只有劣质手绘草地的手工作业 |
| [14:40] | She doesn’t need me anymore. | 她都不需要我了 |
| [14:43] | I yelled at her. | 我还吼她了 |
| [14:45] | Enjoy it now, because when she gets taller, | 趁现在好好享受吧 一旦她长得比你高 |
| [14:48] | it’s not as fun to do that. | 吼她就没现在这么有趣了 |
| [14:51] | I think I owe her an apology. | 我觉得我该向她道歉 |
| [14:52] | Hey, you’re always in the wrong. | 对了 你总是犯错 |
| [14:54] | Can you come with me and coach me through it? | 你能跟我一起去 指导我怎么做吗 |
| [14:57] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [14:59] | Ohh, look at the detail on that DNA double helix | 瞧瞧这个DNA双螺旋模型的细节 |
| [15:02] | made with gumdrops and Twizzlers. | 还是用水果软糖和甘草棒做的呢 |
| [15:04] | That’s nine years old! | 这玩意儿都九年了 |
| [15:09] | So, about what happened earlier… | 关于之前的事 |
| [15:12] | Apology time. | 道歉时间 |
| [15:13] | You’re smart to bring the expert. | 你很机智 还带了专家来 |
| [15:15] | You were right. | 你是对的 |
| [15:17] | The fort was perfect the way you made it. | 你建造的堡垒正是最完美的样子 |
| [15:19] | Except for the — | 除了… |
| [15:20] | Don’t veer. | 别偏题 |
| [15:21] | Thanks. It was perfect. | 谢了 很完美 |
| [15:24] | Then why did you get so upset? | 那你为什么那么难过 |
| [15:25] | Because we always used to do your projects together, | 因为我们之前总是一起完成你的项目 |
| [15:27] | and now you can do them by yourself. | 但现在你自己就能做了 |
| [15:29] | You don’t need me. And I freaked out. | 你不需要我了 我慌了 |
| [15:32] | It doesn’t mean I don’t need you anymore. | 这不代表我不再需要你了 |
| [15:35] | I just… have my own life, you know? | 我只是有自己的生活 你明白吗 |
| [15:39] | I know. I know. | 我明白 我懂 |
| [15:41] | I made it about me, and it’s not. | 我以自己为中心了 但不该如此 |
| [15:43] | I’m sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
| [15:45] | Oh, no. | 糟了 |
| [15:47] | What? I thought that was a good apology. | 怎么了 我以为这道歉不错呢 |
| [15:48] | I mean, I didn’t try to shift blame or cry, like you said I should, | 我没照你说的试图转移过失或哭泣 |
| [15:50] | but I thought we got to a good place. | 但我以为我们现在和好如初挺好的呢 |
| [15:52] | No. I’ve got to go track down Doris and Angela. | 不是 我得去追多瑞丝和安吉拉 |
| [15:55] | Turns out I’m to blame again. | 事实证明 又该怪我了 |
| [15:57] | Why does this keep happening? | 为什么总是这样 |
| [15:58] | I’m always in the wrong place | 我总是在错误的地点 |
| [15:59] | at the wrong time being the wrong person. | 错误的时间 做那个错误的人 |
| [16:05] | That one’s a project | 这家伙就是个大项目 |
| [16:06] | we’ll be working on together for the rest of our lives. | 我们下半辈子都要一起完成 |
| [16:12] | Hey! Here it comes! | 快看 车开过来了 |
| [16:14] | Oh, we need to get inside. | 我们应该进屋去 |
| [16:17] | Although, I am having a really great hair day. | 不过 我今天的发型很好看 |
| [16:20] | Yeah. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, | 是啊 我之前在镜中看见了自己 |
| [16:22] | and I was like, “You’ve grown up real good.” | 忍不住说了句 “你真是男大十八变” |
| [16:24] | Maybe we should be in the picture. | 或许我们应该留在照片上 |
| [16:26] | Yeah, I could be remembered forever like this. | 没错 我这帅气的样子会被永远铭记住 |
| [16:31] | Look at my shoes! | 看我的鞋 |
| [16:34] | You didn’t turn off the hose | 我们清理完卢瑟的屎以后 |
| [16:35] | after we cleaned up Luther’s poop! | 你没有把水管关上 |
| [16:37] | My very-convincing Bernuti knockoffs are ruined! | 我以假乱真的伯尔鲁帝山寨鞋被毁了 |
| [16:40] | Don’t be a baby. It’s just mud. | 别耍小孩脾气了 就是泥而已 |
| [16:41] | Oh, yeah? | 是吗 |
| [16:46] | What is wrong with you?! | 你是有什么毛病 |
| [16:47] | It’s just mud. | 就是泥而已 |
| [16:48] | Well, this is just me pushing you into “Just mud.” | 那我现在把你推进”就是泥”里 |
| [17:00] | I don’t know how this is any better, | 我不明白这样比之前好在哪儿了 |
| [17:01] | but thanks for the belt. | 不过多谢你的皮带 |
| [17:06] | Maybe this is a sign Mom’s right. | 也许这说明妈妈是对的 |
| [17:08] | We should try to get along better. | 我们应该试着好好相处 |
| [17:11] | Yeah, I know. I felt weird saying it. | 好吧 我知道 一说出来就感觉很怪了 |
| [17:16] | How cute is it that Jane and Charlie ran ahead to set up a picnic. | 简和查理跑到前头去准备野餐也太可爱了 |
| [17:18] | Well, it’d be much cuter if they set it up right about here | 如果他们就在这儿准备野餐 就更可爱了 |
| [17:21] | so that I wouldn’t have to walk up this hill. | 这样我就不用爬到山顶了 |
| [17:23] | But we’re in the new phase of the relationship, | 但我们现在到了感情的新阶段 |
| [17:25] | so I’m all, “Ooh! A hike! Ooh! A picnic!” | 所以我只能说 “哇 徒步 哇 野餐” |
| [17:29] | Doris! Angela! | 多瑞丝 安吉拉 |
| [17:30] | What? It couldn’t be. | 什么 不可能的 |
| [17:32] | Wait up! | 等等 |
| [17:34] | Oh, God. | 天啊 |
| [17:38] | Slow down! | 慢一点 |
| [17:41] | I’m wearing the shoes that I bought at the gas station. | 我穿的是我在加油站买的鞋 |
| [17:43] | They have very little arch support. | 足弓支撑力非常弱 |
| [17:46] | Guys, I’m on a hike. | 各位 我在徒步啊 |
| [17:47] | This is huge for me. | 这对我来说可是大事 |
| [17:48] | The last time I was on a hike was in my dream. | 上次我徒步还是在梦里呢 |
| [17:50] | Greg was a platypus and all my teeth fell out. | 梦里格雷格是只鸭嘴兽 而且我牙齿都掉光了 |
| [17:58] | I thought we were leading separate lives, Katie. | 我们不是在过各自的人生吗 凯蒂 |
| [18:00] | I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. | 我错了 我不是那个意思 |
| [18:02] | It’s just, you guys met people and started taking hikes. | 只是你们认识了别人 开始徒步 |
| [18:06] | And soon there’ll be weekend getaways and game nights, | 很快你们就会有周末旅行和游戏之夜 |
| [18:08] | and Oliver is taller than me. | 而且奥利弗比我高了 |
| [18:10] | Just eliminate protein. That’ll slow him down. | 别给他吃蛋白质了 这会让他生长速度慢下来的 |
| [18:12] | I know I’m not making any sense. | 我知道我在胡言乱语 |
| [18:14] | Oh, I think I get what’s happening. | 我觉得我知道怎么回事了 |
| [18:15] | Oliver got taller than you, and it freaked you out. | 奥利弗长得比你高了 让你慌了 |
| [18:17] | Meanwhile, Angela and I started dating new people, | 同时 我和安吉拉开始和别人约会 |
| [18:19] | and things are changing. | 所以以前的生活有了变化 |
| [18:20] | And you hate change. | 而你讨厌变化 |
| [18:22] | Yeah. That’s true. | 是的 没错 |
| [18:24] | And you feel like everyone’s moving forward | 所以你觉得所有人都在前进 |
| [18:25] | and you’re being left behind. | 而你被抛下了 |
| [18:26] | Yes! | 没错 |
| [18:27] | And then we weren’t there for you… | 然后 我们没陪在你身边 |
| [18:28] | Through no fault of our own. | 尽管我们本身没有犯错 |
| [18:30] | to help you through all of this, | 帮你渡过这一切 |
| [18:31] | which freaked you out even more. | 你就更慌了 |
| [18:32] | And so, like a reasonable adult, | 因此 作为一个通情达理的成年人 |
| [18:34] | you replaced us with your child’s principal and his girlfriend. | 你用你孩子校长和校长的女朋友 代替了我们 |
| [18:41] | That sums it up. | 你们总结了整件事 |
| [18:43] | On the plus side, | 好的一面是 |
| [18:44] | Oliver is growing up, so he’s that much closer to moving out, | 奥利弗长大了 所以他很快就会搬出去 |
| [18:47] | which means you can turn his bedroom into a pottery studio. | 也就意味着你可以把他的卧室改成陶艺工作室 |
| [18:50] | Right! | 没错 |
| [18:52] | See?! | 瞧吧 |
| [18:53] | This is exactly what I needed to hear! | 这正是我需要听到的 |
| [18:55] | I need you guys. | 我需要你们 |
| [18:59] | So can we still have Second Breakfast? | 所以第二顿早餐的传统还能继续吗 |
| [19:00] | Of course! | 当然 |
| [19:01] | We need it now more than ever | 我们比以往更加需要 |
| [19:02] | because we need to complain about the people we’re dating. | 因为我们需要吐槽我们的约会对象 |
| [19:04] | Oh. I’ll start. I hate hiking. | 我先来 我讨厌徒步 |
| [19:07] | And if you think Greg’s war reenactments are annoying, | 如果你觉得格雷格的战争重演很烦 |
| [19:09] | just wait until you hear about Jane’s alcohol problem. | 那简的酗酒问题就更可怕了 |
| [19:12] | That sounds fun. I can’t wait. | 听起来好有趣 我等不及了 |
| [19:14] | – Come on. Walk to the top with us. – Yeah. | -来吧 和我们一起登顶 -是啊 |
| [19:16] | I think you know better. | 你们应该不至于这么无知吧 |
| [19:25] | Everything is changing so fast. | 一切都变得太快了 |
| [19:27] | They don’t need us for school projects. | 他们不需要我们帮忙做学校的手工项目 |
| [19:29] | Remember when they were so tiny? | 还记得他们小时候吗 |
| [19:58] | They’re gonna be gone before we know it. | 我们还没反应过来 他们就会搬出这个家了 |
| [20:00] | Yeah. But there’s an upside. | 是啊 但也有好的一面 |
| [20:02] | As soon as they move out… | 一旦他们搬出去 |
| [20:05] | pottery studio… | 陶艺工作室 |
| [20:06] | home theater… | 家庭影院 |
| [20:11] | Revolutionary War commemorative plate room. | 美国革命战争纪念品制版室 |
| [20:24] | Look at that. | 瞧吧 |
| [20:25] | We’re number six on the Street Pics top 10 fails list. | 我们在”街景图片”抓拍到的十大丢人画面里排第六 |
| [20:28] | How is it possible we beat out | 我们怎么会比 |
| [20:30] | “Pantsless Granny Fights Possum”? | “光屁股老太太大战负鼠”排名还靠前 |
| [20:33] | Oliver, stand up and come here. | 奥利弗 站起来 过来 |
| [20:40] | See? | 瞧吧 |
| [20:41] | This is more like it. | 这才像话 |
| [20:43] | I got the upper hand back, baby! | 我又占上风了 宝贝 |
| [20:46] | Doctor says I’m gonna grow at least four more inches. | 医生说我至少还能长高四英寸 |
| [20:52] | Stop eating protein! | 别再吃蛋白质了 |
| [20:54] | And start smoking! | 开始抽烟吧 |