| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | I got my campaign posters back from the printer. | 我刚从打印店拿到了我的竞选海报 |
| [00:09] | Tell me what you think. | 你觉得怎么样 |
| [00:11] | “Greg Otto: Integrity.” | 格雷格·奥图 正直 |
| [00:14] | Babe, I love it! | 宝贝 我喜欢这个 |
| [00:14] | That’s the same voice you use | 孩子们给你看他们的美术作业时 |
| [00:16] | when the kids show you their art projects. | 你也是这种语气 |
| [00:17] | Fine. I don’t like the slogan. | 好吧 我不喜欢这个口号 |
| [00:19] | What’s wrong with “Integrity”? | 正直怎么了 |
| [00:20] | As someone without integrity, | 对于某些不正直的人来说 |
| [00:21] | it feels like an attack. | 这像是人身攻击 |
| [00:22] | Plus, it’s boring. | 再说 这很无聊 |
| [00:23] | The slogan needs to be catchy, | 口号需要夺人眼球 |
| [00:25] | like “Make Westport Greg Again!” | 就像 让西港再次格雷格[与伟大谐音] |
| [00:27] | How can I make Westport more Greg? | 我怎么能让西港更格雷格 |
| [00:29] | And the word “Again” Implies that the town | 而且”再次”这个词 意味着 |
| [00:31] | was once Greg and now it’s not. | 这城市曾经格雷格 但现在不是了 |
| [00:33] | You took the fun out of this real fast. | 你真的很扫兴 |
| [00:35] | I’m sticking with integrity. | 我还是坚持用正直 |
| [00:36] | It’s the perfect slogan because my opponents have none. | 正因为我的对手缺乏这个 所以这很完美 |
| [00:39] | Principal Ablin’s only in it for power, | 阿布林校长竞选只是为了权力 |
| [00:40] | and Steve Hobert’s a dirty politician | 而史蒂夫·霍巴特就是个肮脏的政客 |
| [00:42] | who only pushes policies in exchange for favors. | 他推行政策只是为了从中获利 |
| [00:44] | That’s the gig, Greg. | 就是这样 格雷格 |
| [00:45] | If you want to be a politician, | 如果你想当政客 |
| [00:46] | you got to get your hands dirty. | 你就得弄脏双手 |
| [00:48] | Not gonna happen. | 不可能 |
| [00:49] | My hands will stay clean because I have… | 我绝对不会碰那些事 因为我 |
| [00:52] | You’re a good person. | 你是个好人 |
| [00:54] | We get it. | 我们知道了 |
| [00:56] | Taylor, heads up — I’m not doing laundry today. | 泰勒 提个醒 我今天不准备洗衣服 |
| [00:58] | So, if you need underwear, | 所以 如果你需要内裤 |
| [00:59] | cut two holes in one of your dad’s NPR totes. | 把你爸公共广播电台的帆布袋剪两个洞 |
| [01:02] | Mom, you’re so embarrassing. | 妈 你真让我丢人 |
| [01:03] | I’m on with the Joshes. | 我正在和乔希们视频 |
| [01:05] | – Hey, Mrs. Otto. – Hi, Mrs. Otto. | -嘿 奥图夫人 -嗨 奥图夫人 |
| [01:07] | Katie. My lady. | 凯蒂 我的女士 |
| [01:09] | Hey, Josh. | 嘿 乔希 |
| [01:10] | Hi, Josh. | 嗨 乔希 |
| [01:11] | Hello. Josh. | 你好 乔希 |
| [01:14] | What are you doing still hanging out with these idiots? | 你为什么还跟这三个蠢货一起玩 |
| [01:16] | Mom, they can hear you. | 妈妈 他们能听见 |
| [01:17] | Sweetie, it’s okay. | 宝贝 没关系 |
| [01:18] | They know they’re idiots. | 他们有自知之明 |
| [01:19] | Mrs. Otto, you should come with us to Blow A Gasket. | 奥图夫人 你该跟我们一起来”大发雷霆” |
| [01:22] | It’s this cool rage-room | 是个很酷的发泄室 |
| [01:23] | where you can pay to smash old electronics. | 你能给钱去砸老旧的电器 |
| [01:25] | And we think it’d be healthy for you, | 自从见识了你有多易怒之后 |
| [01:27] | seeing how you’re so filled with rage. | 我们觉得这有助于你的身心健康 |
| [01:29] | It’s not rage. It’s hate. | 这不是愤怒 是仇恨 |
| [01:31] | Rage is fleeting. | 愤怒易逝 |
| [01:32] | Hate is forever. | 但愤仇恨永存 |
| [01:34] | – But, Katie… – Mom, | -但是凯蒂 -妈妈 |
| [01:35] | stop intimidating my friends! | 别再恐吓我的朋友了 |
| [01:37] | The Joshes are a bad influence. | 乔希们会带坏你 |
| [01:39] | You’re in college now. | 你已经在读大学了 |
| [01:40] | You need to find higher-quality people. | 你需要结交一些更高品质的人 |
| [01:42] | You’re right. I am in college, | 你说得对 我都大学了 |
| [01:44] | which means you can’t tell me who to hang out with anymore. | 你不能再命令我该跟哪些人一起玩了 |
| [01:47] | She just walked away from me. | 她竟然就这样走掉了 |
| [01:48] | Can you believe her? | 你敢信吗 |
| [01:50] | Are you really using my totes for underwear? | 你真的用我的帆布袋当内裤了吗 |
| [01:52] | Watch me undress tonight and you’ll have your answer. | 等我今晚脱掉衣服后 你就知道了 |
| [02:01] | Somebody named Jessica Van Hought was arrested | 有个叫杰西卡·范·霍特的人 |
| [02:03] | for shoplifting a toothbrush. | 因为偷牙刷被捕了 |
| [02:05] | How embarrassing. | 多丢人啊 |
| [02:06] | Ooh, public shaming. | 公开羞辱 |
| [02:07] | I love it. | 我喜欢这个 |
| [02:08] | This is why I moved to Westport. | 我搬到西港来就是为了这个 |
| [02:11] | And because of my job. | 顺便也是为了工作 |
| [02:12] | Actually, it was really only my job, | 事实上只是为了工作 |
| [02:13] | but this is fun. | 但这真有意思 |
| [02:15] | Jessica is loaded. | 杰西卡很有钱 |
| [02:16] | Why would she shoplift? | 她为什么要从商店顺东西 |
| [02:17] | For the thrill. | 为了刺激 |
| [02:19] | And that’s why I steal the silverware here | 我也经常从这儿偷走银餐具 |
| [02:20] | and throw it away when I get home. | 然后回家丢掉 |
| [02:25] | Well, I have some actual big news. | 好吧 我有些真正的大新闻 |
| [02:28] | I’m close to picking an egg donor! | 我快要选出卵子捐献人了 |
| [02:30] | I’m down to two candidates. | 只剩下两个候选人 |
| [02:32] | This is so exciting. | 真是令人激动 |
| [02:34] | Both my donors are smart, healthy, | 这两个捐献人都聪明 健康 |
| [02:36] | and play musical instruments, so it’s a tie. | 还会弹奏乐器 这就成了个平局 |
| [02:38] | I want my kid playing Britney Spears’ “Toxic” | 我想要我的孩子在三岁的时候 |
| [02:40] | on a baby grand by the time they’re three. | 就能用三角钢琴弹布兰妮·斯皮尔斯的《毒药》 |
| [02:43] | Well, in my experience, musical talent is not genetic. | 据我所知 音乐天赋没法由基因决定 |
| [02:45] | I mean, my kids can’t sing, but I sure — | 我的孩子就不擅长唱歌 但我明显 |
| [02:47] | ♪ Ca-a-a-a-an ♪ | ♪可以♪ |
| [02:50] | Well, next time, give me a heads up | 下次给我提个醒 |
| [02:51] | and I’m gonna come in with the harmony. | 我要跟你和声 |
| [02:54] | I’m going to the fertility clinic | 我要去生育诊所 |
| [02:55] | to see if they have any more information, | 看看他们有没有更多的信息 |
| [02:57] | and I want you guys to come with to help me decide. | 而且我想要你们一起来帮我做下决定 |
| [02:59] | I’m in. | 我来 |
| [03:00] | We got to pick you out a good-looking baby | 我们会帮你挑出一个好看的婴儿来 |
| [03:02] | so that I don’t have to give vague compliments | 这样我就不用说一些含糊的赞美了 |
| [03:03] | like, “Oh, what a darling outfit,” | 比如 这个衣服真好看 |
| [03:05] | or “Wow, just look at her.” | 或者 快看看她 |
| [03:08] | I’m in, too. | 我也来 |
| [03:09] | If I could have had control over Grace’s genetics, | 如果我能有机会选择格蕾丝的基因 |
| [03:11] | I would make sure she didn’t get | 我会确保过滤掉她 |
| [03:12] | the “Dip all my lipsticks in the toilet” Gene. | 把我所有口红放进马桶里的基因 |
| [03:14] | I knew I could count on you guys. | 我就知道可以指望你们 |
| [03:16] | This is the best squad ever. | 我们是最棒的小团体 |
| [03:18] | Aww. I wish Taylor had a group like this. | 我希望泰勒也能像我们这样 |
| [03:20] | All of her friends went off to college, | 她所有的朋友都去上大学了 |
| [03:21] | and now she is left with The Joshes. | 现在她只能跟乔希们玩了 |
| [03:23] | Uh, The Joshes? Mm-hmm. | 乔希们 |
| [03:25] | They’re great. | 他们棒极了 |
| [03:26] | Josh has a lacrosse net in his yard. | 乔希的后院有长曲棍球网 |
| [03:27] | He said I can use it at any time. | 他说我随时都能用 |
| [03:29] | I mean, I haven’t yet, but again, | 虽然我还没用过 但是 |
| [03:31] | totally can at any time. | 肯定随时都能用 |
| [03:34] | I need a fork. | 我需要把叉子 |
| [03:46] | So, is everyone happy with the fan placement? | 所以大家对于风扇的位置满意吗 |
| [03:48] | I went with an indirect wind | 我选择用间接风 |
| [03:50] | as opposed to the fans on you guys. | 而不是把风扇直接对着你们吹 |
| [03:52] | It’s an old trick Richard Branson taught me. | 这是个理查德·布兰森教我的老把戏 |
| [03:56] | Do either of you need any help? | 你们俩要帮忙吗 |
| [03:59] | No, thanks. Uh, I’ve got this business plan under control. | 不用了 谢谢 我已经搞定了这个商业计划 |
| [04:02] | And nobody touches my code. | 没人能碰我的代码 |
| [04:04] | Okay, then. | 好吧 |
| [04:07] | What can I do? | 我能做什么 |
| [04:07] | Nothing. | 什么都做不了 |
| [04:08] | Because you’re useless. | 因为你很没用 |
| [04:12] | That is not true. | 这不是真的 |
| [04:13] | Cooper brings tons of value to our start-up. | 库珀在起步阶段对我们帮助很大 |
| [04:15] | Like what? | 比如 |
| [04:17] | he can wear the crap out of a pair of Gucci driving loafers. | 他能把古驰乐福鞋穿得非常好看 |
| [04:20] | I really can. | 我真的可以 |
| [04:21] | Let me lay out some facts for you, alright? | 我跟你讲实话 行吗 |
| [04:22] | Fact number one — when you had money, | 事实一 当你有钱的时候 |
| [04:25] | you could have been an investor. | 你可以成为一个投资人 |
| [04:26] | But now that you have no money, you serve no purpose. | 但你现在没钱 所以没用 |
| [04:29] | And fact number two — you’ve got toothpick legs. | 事实二 你的腿像牙签一样 |
| [04:31] | It seems highly unlikely that a pair of driving loafers | 很难想象你穿乐福鞋 |
| [04:33] | would look good on you. | 会好看 |
| [04:35] | Okay. Feels like a natural stopping point for today. | 好的 感觉今天圆满结束了 |
| [04:43] | Don’t let Trevor get under your skin. | 别因为特雷弗而不高兴 |
| [04:45] | He’s right about me, man. | 他说得对 兄弟 |
| [04:46] | Without my money, what am I good for? | 没了钱我还有什么用 |
| [04:48] | – You’re a talented guy. – How? | -你很有天赋的 -怎么说 |
| [04:50] | You can raise your eyebrow really well | 你很擅长挑眉毛 |
| [04:51] | in an inquisitive manner. | 给人一种你很好奇的感觉 |
| [04:53] | So my brow game is at a hundred. | 所以我玩眉毛游戏能得满分 |
| [04:55] | Big whoop. | 真棒 |
| [04:59] | Toothpick legs. | 牙签腿 |
| [05:04] | I’m sick of my mom judging my friends! | 我厌倦了我妈对我的朋友品头论足 |
| [05:07] | I keep forgetting my Hulu password! | 我老是忘记自己葫芦网的密码 |
| [05:10] | There’s an owl outside my window that keeps waking me up! | 有只猫头鹰总是在窗外吵我睡觉 |
| [05:15] | Nobody will go see Shawn Mendes with me! | 没人愿意陪我去看肖恩·蒙德兹的演唱会 |
| [05:24] | Wow. That was fun. | 哇 太有趣了 |
| [05:25] | What do you guys want to do next? | 你们接下来想去做什么 |
| [05:26] | I say we all go hot tubbing. | 要不要去泡澡 |
| [05:27] | And then get hot chocolate. | 然后来杯热巧克力 |
| [05:29] | That sounds great. | 听起来很棒 |
| [05:30] | I don’t know why my mom thinks | 我真搞不懂为什么我妈觉得 |
| [05:31] | you guys are such a bad influence on me. | 你们会对我有不好的影响 |
| [05:33] | Hot tub hopping is trespassing, | 浴缸派对属于非法侵入 |
| [05:36] | but since it’s her first offense, | 但是鉴于她是初犯 |
| [05:37] | I’m letting her go with a warning. | 我只给她一个警告处分 |
| [05:39] | Thank you so much, Officer. | 太谢谢您了 长官 |
| [05:41] | We will take it from here. | 我们会吸取教训的 |
| [05:45] | What the hell is wrong with you, Taylor? | 你有什么毛病 泰勒 |
| [05:47] | It’s just tub hopping, Mom. | 只是泡热水澡 妈妈 |
| [05:49] | Relax. | 放松 |
| [05:51] | Relax? | 放松 |
| [05:53] | You said a “No-no” Word. | 这个词你是万万不能说的 |
| [05:55] | This is not about hot tub hopping. | 这跟浴缸派对无关 |
| [05:56] | This is about The Joshes always getting you into trouble. | 问题是乔希们老是带你惹麻烦 |
| [05:59] | Next time, do it right. | 下次你清醒点 |
| [06:00] | Pick a house where the people aren’t home, | 选个主人不在的房子 |
| [06:02] | throw a party, it gets out of control, | 再开派对狂欢 情况失控的话 |
| [06:04] | call the cops on yourself. | 自己打电话叫警察 |
| [06:05] | That’s how it’s done. | 这么做才对 |
| [06:07] | Taylor, did the police officer take you to the station | 泰勒 载你回家之前 |
| [06:09] | before he drove you home? | 警官有带你去警局吗 |
| [06:11] | I got booked and everything, | 我做了笔录之类的 |
| [06:12] | but I think he just did it to scare me. | 但我觉得他只是为了吓唬我 |
| [06:14] | Haberdashery! | 荒唐之举 |
| [06:15] | Ooh, you’re in big trouble. | 你完了 |
| [06:17] | Your father is talking old-timey. | 你爸爸开始讲些老话 |
| [06:19] | If you got booked, that means your picture | 如果你做了笔录 那意味着你的照片 |
| [06:21] | is definitely going to make it in the police blotter | 一定会出现在西港公报的 |
| [06:22] | in the Westport Gazette. | 警察逮捕记录里 |
| [06:23] | I’m running for office. | 我在竞选 |
| [06:25] | How can I run on integrity when my daughter is a criminal? | 如果我女儿是个罪犯 我还怎么立正直的人设 |
| [06:27] | The cop let me off with a warning. | 警察只是警告了我 |
| [06:29] | I’m sure if we explain that to the newspaper dudes, | 我确定如果我们好好跟公报那些人讲讲 |
| [06:31] | they won’t run the story. I’ll come with you. | 他们不会乱写的 我会跟你一起去 |
| [06:33] | That’s actually a pretty good idea, | 这主意很好 |
| [06:34] | and you volunteering to fix your mistake | 你自愿改正错误 |
| [06:36] | shows a lot of integrity. | 显得你正直 |
| [06:38] | Integrity’s a good thing. | 正直是件好事 |
| [06:39] | Oh. Okay. | 好吧 |
| [06:44] | Ooh, we have enough. | 材料齐了 |
| [06:45] | We can upgrade our house. | 我们可以升级房间了 |
| [06:46] | Oh. Yes. | 太好了 |
| [06:53] | What are you doing, man? | 你在干什么 兄弟 |
| [06:54] | What does it look like? | 我看起来在干什么 |
| [06:55] | I’m eating my feelings. | 我在消化情绪 |
| [06:56] | I have no value, nothing to offer the world. | 我没有价值 对世界毫无贡献 |
| [07:01] | That’s your opening, dude. | 是你要聊天的 兄弟 |
| [07:03] | You’re killing the vibe, man. | 别扫兴 兄弟 |
| [07:04] | I’m on a date here. | 我在这儿约会呢 |
| [07:07] | It’s hard to play when you’re moping around. | 你这么无精打采 我们很难玩起来 |
| [07:10] | So, cheer up. | 开心点 |
| [07:12] | Or shut up. | 或者闭嘴 |
| [07:14] | Give him a break. | 放过他吧 |
| [07:15] | He’s trying to figure out his place in the world. | 他正在想试图弄清自己在世界上的定位 |
| [07:17] | Is there anything you’ve always wanted to try, but haven’t? | 你有没有那种一直想做但还没做的事 |
| [07:20] | I feel like I have the soul of an artist, | 我觉得自己有艺术家的灵魂 |
| [07:22] | but I’ve never actually drawn anything. | 但从没画过任何东西 |
| [07:24] | Grab the crayons. | 快拿蜡笔过来 |
| [07:26] | The nice ones. | 好的那些 |
| [07:27] | They’re in the safe in my closet. | 在我衣橱的保险柜里 |
| [07:28] | – You know the code. – 4932276098. | -你知道密码的 -4932276098 |
| [07:31] | Great. Now we all know the code. | 好极了 现在都知道了 |
| [07:41] | Alright, guys, let’s see your portraits. | 好了 让我看看你们的肖像画 |
| [07:44] | Here’s mine. | 这是我的 |
| [07:46] | What do you think? | 你觉得怎么样 |
| [07:47] | Wow. Wow, Cooper. | 哇 哇 库珀 |
| [07:50] | Seriously, your drawing I-is amazing. | 说真的 你的画棒极了 |
| [07:52] | Love, hate, life, death. | 爱恨生死 |
| [07:53] | It’s all in there. | 都在里面了 |
| [07:58] | Let me see your drawings. | 让我看看你们的画 |
| [08:02] | Holy crap. | 天啊 |
| [08:03] | Mine’s terrible. | 我画得太烂了 |
| [08:04] | Franklin, let me see yours. | 富兰克林 让我看看你的 |
| [08:07] | Normally, I’m more of a surrealist, | 通常我是一个超现实主义画家 |
| [08:09] | but with the medium of crayon, | 但因为用的是蜡笔 |
| [08:10] | impressionism called to me. | 所以我感受到了印象派的召唤 |
| [08:11] | Oh, yeah? | 是吗 |
| [08:12] | Did a tragic fashion sense call you, too? | 让人惨不忍睹的时尚品味也召唤你了吗 |
| [08:15] | Sorry. I’m lashing out ’cause I’m hurting. | 对不起 我攻击你是因为我受挫了 |
| [08:18] | It’s actually quite lovely. | 其实这幅画很好 |
| [08:20] | It’s crap! | 这幅画就是垃圾 |
| [08:25] | So, I’m deciding between Donor 20 and Donor 11, | 我想在第20号和第11号捐赠者中选一个 |
| [08:28] | and I was wondering if you had any more information on them. | 你能不能再多提供一些他们的信息 |
| [08:30] | All the donor information can be accessed on the online portal. | 捐赠人的所有信息都可以在网站上看到 |
| [08:33] | I’ve read the files, and I need to know more. | 我已经读过资料了 我需要知道更多的信息 |
| [08:35] | You can tell a lot from looking into someone’s eyes. | 你可以从一个人的眼睛里读到很多信息 |
| [08:38] | Like, your favorite Beyoncé album is… | 比如 你最喜欢的碧昂丝专辑是… |
| [08:41] | Oh, my God. It’s “B’Day”! | 天呐 是《生日纪念》 |
| [08:43] | Girl, you are a loose cannon. | 姐妹 你可真狂野 |
| [08:44] | I’m sorry, but we don’t go that in-depth with the donors. | 对不起 但我们对捐赠者的了解程度不会那么深 |
| [08:47] | Well, is there any way we could contact them | 有没有其他方式能联系她们 |
| [08:48] | to see if they’d be willing to set up a meeting? | 看看她们愿不愿意见面 |
| [08:50] | I can’t give out any of that information. | 我不能透露这类信息 |
| [08:52] | Egg donation is anonymous. | 捐卵是匿名的 |
| [08:53] | Oh, I see. | 我明白 |
| [08:55] | Like how Alcoholics Anonymous says it’s anonymous, | 就像匿名戒酒会 说是匿名的 |
| [08:57] | but it’s not really anonymous. | 但其实不是 |
| [08:59] | If someone sees a celebrity there, they’re gonna tell. | 如果有人看到名人出席 他们肯定会到处说 |
| [09:01] | Yeah, my uncle was in AA with someone | 是的 我叔叔以前的匿名戒酒会里 |
| [09:03] | whose name rhymes with Shmel Bibson. | 有个人的名字和施梅尔·贝布森押韵 |
| [09:06] | Would a hundred dollar bill change your mind? | 一百美金能让你改主意吗 |
| [09:08] | Tami, cough it up. | 塔米 掏钱 |
| [09:09] | I don’t have any cash. | 我没带现金 |
| [09:10] | J.D. J.D.? | |
| [09:11] | Uh, do you take Venmo? | 转账可以吗 |
| [09:12] | Get out. | 出去 |
| [09:13] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [09:16] | I’ll just tell you. | 我告诉你吧 |
| [09:17] | It was Mel Gibson. | 是梅尔·吉布森[美国演员] |
| [09:24] | Guys, I don’t know if I can have a baby | 要是不和捐卵者见面 |
| [09:26] | without meeting my egg donor in person. | 我无法确定自己该不该要这个孩子 |
| [09:27] | What if she’s someone who claps when a plane lands? | 她要是那种飞机落地时会鼓掌人怎么办 |
| [09:29] | I can’t live with that kind of genetic material. | 我可接受不了那种遗传基因 |
| [09:31] | Hey, I do that. Why is that bad? | 我就那样 鼓掌有什么不好的 |
| [09:32] | – We lived. – Don’t worry. | -我们幸存下来了啊 -别担心 |
| [09:34] | We can still meet your donors. | 我们还能见到你的捐赠人 |
| [09:36] | Before we left, I went to the bathroom | 在我们离开之前 我去了卫生间 |
| [09:37] | and unlocked the window. | 然后把窗户的锁打开了 |
| [09:39] | So we can sneak back in tonight | 所以我们可以今晚溜进去 |
| [09:40] | and get the addresses of your donors. | 拿你捐赠人的地址 |
| [09:42] | What if we get caught? I can’t go to jail. | 我们要是被抓怎么办 我不能蹲监狱 |
| [09:44] | Come on. Be cool. | 拜托 淡定点 |
| [09:45] | Oh, okay. I’m in. | 好吧 我加入 |
| [09:47] | I’m very susceptible to peer pressure. | 我很容易受团体压力影响 |
| [09:48] | Tami, if we get caught, | 塔米 如果我们被抓到 |
| [09:49] | they’re never going to consider me viable | 他们就再也不会考虑 |
| [09:50] | for an egg donation. | 提供卵子给我了 |
| [09:52] | Oh, that’s true. I’m back out. | 没错 我退出 |
| [09:53] | But you just said if you don’t meet them face-to-face, | 但你刚才也说如果不和她们见面 |
| [09:55] | then you’re not going to do it. | 你就不会要孩子 |
| [09:56] | If we don’t do this, no baby. | 如果我们不这么做 就要不了孩子 |
| [09:59] | I really want a baby. | 我真的想要一个孩子 |
| [10:01] | – I’m in. – I’m back in, too. | -我加入 -那我也重新加入 |
| [10:03] | This is fun. | 这好有趣 |
| [10:03] | I’m all over the place. | 我现在完全乱了 |
| [10:04] | Yeah, you are. | 是的 没错 |
| [10:06] | 西港日报 每日新闻 | |
| [10:09] | I can’t believe the publisher wouldn’t retract the story. | 我不相信报刊发行人不肯撤回报道 |
| [10:11] | I guess he has integrity. | 看来他是正直的人 |
| [10:13] | You learned a new word today. We get it. | 你今天学会了一个新词 我知道了 |
| [10:16] | Aren’t you that dude from Stewart and Kingston’s | 你是不是那个在斯金餐厅 |
| [10:18] | who writes a quote on every check? | 每写一张支票都加一句名言的人 |
| [10:20] | “Knowledge is power. | “知识就是力量 |
| [10:21] | Knowledge shared is power multiplied.” | 而知识共享会让力量倍增” |
| [10:23] | Robert Noyce. | 出自罗伯特·诺伊斯 |
| [10:23] | Yeah, I need to get a photo of you | 好了 我要拍一张你的照片 |
| [10:25] | to prove to the guys in the kitchen | 证明给厨房的那些人看 |
| [10:26] | that you’re not a 90-year-old woman. | 你不是什么90岁的老太太 |
| [10:29] | Why were you guys meeting with my dad? | 你们为什么来见我爸 |
| [10:31] | Your dad is the publisher of the Westport Gazette? | 你爸是西港公报的发行人吗 |
| [10:32] | Sure is. | 是的 |
| [10:33] | In fact, the only reason he bought it | 事实上 他买下这家报社的唯一原因 |
| [10:34] | was to keep me out of the arrest page. | 就是为了让我不被登在逮捕版面上 |
| [10:36] | As someone who always tips you 20%, | 我总是付你百分之二十的小费 |
| [10:37] | would you mind asking your dad | 你介不介意让你爸 |
| [10:39] | to keep her out of the police blotter? | 把她从逮捕记录里撤掉 |
| [10:40] | I’m running for city council. | 我在竞选市议员 |
| [10:41] | I can’t afford a scandal right now. | 我现在经受不起丑闻的影响 |
| [10:43] | It won’t be the first time I’ve helped a politician | 这也不是我第一次帮政客 |
| [10:45] | keep his mistress out of the newspaper. | 把他们情妇的名字从报纸上撤掉了 |
| [10:47] | – She’s my daughter. – He’s my dad! | -她是我女儿 -他是我爸 |
| [10:49] | You guys have your story straight. | 你们已经对好口供了 |
| [10:51] | Well done. | 非常好 |
| [10:51] | I’d be happy to help you, | 我愿意帮你 |
| [10:53] | if you’re willing to help me. | 如果你愿意帮我的话 |
| [10:55] | Once you’re on the city council, | 一旦你选上议员 |
| [10:56] | I need you to rezone my ex’s house | 我要你给我前妻的房子重新分区 |
| [10:58] | so it’s not in Westport. | 这样它就不属于西港区了 |
| [10:59] | Why would you want that? | 你为什么要那么做 |
| [11:00] | To lower her property value. | 为了让她的房产贬值 |
| [11:02] | That’ll teach her to call me petty and vengeful. | 她说我小气报复心重 这是给她的教训 |
| [11:05] | I don’t think a deal like that would be ethical. | 我认为这个交易不太道德 |
| [11:06] | Alright, well, think about it. | 好吧 你考虑一下 |
| [11:08] | And if you two ever broke up, trust me, | 如果你们俩分手了 相信我 |
| [11:09] | you’d want to do the same thing to her. | 你也想对她做同样的事 |
| [11:11] | She’s my daughter. | 她是我女儿 |
| [11:12] | And you’re her daddy. | 你是她的”爸爸” |
| [11:21] | What about construction worker? | 当建筑工人怎么样 |
| [11:22] | Oh, no. I promised my great-grandfather | 不行 我曾祖父临终前 |
| [11:25] | on his deathbed never to do manual labor. | 我向他保证过永远不做体力劳动 |
| [11:27] | I wasn’t a pallbearer at his funeral for that very reason. | 因为这个 我参加他的葬礼时都没抬棺 |
| [11:30] | Fair enough. | 好吧 |
| [11:31] | What about…comedian? | 那喜剧演员呢 |
| [11:33] | I have been known | 众所周知 |
| [11:34] | to make some fairly keen observations about the world. | 关于这个世界 我有一些非常敏锐的观点 |
| [11:37] | Maybe it’s time I put it in joke form. | 也许现在我该把它用段子的形式展示出来 |
| [11:39] | Yeah. I love your observations. | 没错 我很喜欢你的观点 |
| [11:41] | Oh. Which ones? | 哪个 |
| [11:43] | The…keen ones. | 很敏锐的那些 |
| [11:45] | I love those, too. | 我也很爱 |
| [11:47] | …then the kangaroo said, | 然后那只袋鼠说 |
| [11:49] | “Because I’m a marsupial, for God’s sake!” | “因为我们是有袋动物啊 我的天呐” |
| [11:53] | My boy can literally do anything. | 我的男孩真是什么都擅长 |
| [11:55] | Thank you, guys. That has been my time. | 谢谢大家 我的表演结束了 |
| [11:57] | Next up on the stage is an up-and-coming comedian. | 下一位要登台的就是我们喜剧演员的未来之星 |
| [12:01] | Put your hands together for Cooper Bradford! | 举起你们的双手 欢迎库珀·布拉福德 |
| [12:08] | So, I was having some spa water the other day, | 我有一天在喝温泉水 |
| [12:11] | and I was like, “Why do they call it spa water?” | 我就想 “为什么叫温泉水” |
| [12:15] | You don’t just drink it in the spa. | 你不只是在泡温泉的时候喝 |
| [12:17] | You drink it on your yacht, in your mansion. | 你在游艇上 宅邸里也会喝 |
| [12:20] | They should call it everywhere water. | 他们该叫它”哪哪都是水” |
| [12:25] | Guys, that’s — that’s funny. | 各位 这很好笑 |
| [12:26] | Don’t talk to us. Just keep going. | 别跟我们说话 继续 |
| [12:28] | What’s a yacht owner’s favorite rap song? | 游艇主最喜欢的饶舌歌是什么 |
| [12:32] | “I Like Big Boats and I Cannot Lie.” | “我喜欢大船 我不能说谎”[原唱是”我喜欢大屁股”] |
| [12:36] | These jokes used to kill with my staff. | 这些段子曾经让我的员工们笑得死去活来 |
| [12:38] | Why aren’t you guys laughing? | 你们怎么不笑 |
| [12:39] | Because you were their boss. | 因为你是他们的老板 |
| [12:40] | You paid them to laugh. | 你付他们钱来笑了 |
| [12:43] | Tough crowd. | 真不好对付 |
| [12:44] | Looks like I need some everywhere water. | 看来我得喝点”哪哪都是水”了 |
| [12:48] | Nothing? That’s called a callback, people. | 还不笑 这可是喜剧高级技术啊 |
| [12:50] | C’mon! | 拜托 |
| [12:55] | I found a way to keep Taylor out of the police blotter, | 我有办法不让泰勒进入警察逮捕记录了 |
| [12:57] | but I need your help. Should I keep my integrity | 但我需要你的帮助 我该保持正直 |
| [12:59] | or should I make a backdoor deal? | 还是应该做个秘密交易 |
| [13:01] | – Greg, come on. – Come on, what? | -格雷格 来吧 -来吧什么 |
| [13:02] | We both know what’s happening here. | 我们都知道这是怎么回事 |
| [13:04] | You, Mr. Integrity, are coming to me, | 你 正直先生 来找我 |
| [13:07] | Mrs. Not A Shred Of Integrity, so I can tell you | 毫不正直女士 所以我能告诉你 |
| [13:10] | to make the decision that you’re too afraid to make. | 做那个你不敢做的决定 |
| [13:12] | That’s exactly what’s happening. | 就是这么回事 |
| [13:13] | Help me justify my actions. | 帮我合理化我的行为 |
| [13:14] | Even though you are benefiting politically | 尽管你让泰德不上报 |
| [13:16] | by keeping Taylor out of the paper, | 能让你在政治层面收益 |
| [13:18] | you are protecting her from embarrassment. | 但同时你也避免了她的难堪 |
| [13:20] | – Keep going. – And whenever you’re trying to protect your family, | -继续 -而无论何时你试图保护家人时 |
| [13:23] | you will always have integrity. | 你都将永远正直 |
| [13:26] | That kind of makes sense. | 竟然有点道理 |
| [13:28] | Just like when the guy in the Mafia whacks someone | 就像黑手党里那个家伙 |
| [13:30] | who’s looking at his wife wrong. | 猛揍盯着他老婆乱看的人一样 |
| [13:31] | – What? – Forget that part. | -什么 -不重要 |
| [13:32] | Make the deal. | 做这个交易 |
| [13:41] | Okay, ladies. Let’s make this quick. | 好了 女士们 我们速战速决 |
| [13:49] | Damn. | 该死 |
| [13:50] | There’s a password. | 需要密码 |
| [13:51] | If this were one of my boys’ computers, | 如果这是我儿子的电脑 |
| [13:52] | I could crack it in a second. | 我马上就能破解 |
| [13:54] | I spent years hacking into their devices. | 我数年来一直在黑他们的电脑 |
| [13:56] | Boobs123, HotBoobs, TigOleBitties. | 大胸123 美胸 提古勒奶头 |
| [14:00] | I’ve seen a thousand episodes of “The Mentalist.” | 我都看过上千集《超感神探》了 |
| [14:02] | My grandmother and I both think Simon Baker’s hot. | 我跟我奶奶都觉得西蒙·贝克超性感 |
| [14:04] | Oh, my God. So hot. | 天啊 太性感了 |
| [14:06] | I don’t know who that is, but I’m gonna say he’s hot, too, | 我不知道他是谁 但我也要说他性感 |
| [14:08] | ’cause I don’t want to get left out. | 因为我不想被冷落 |
| [14:09] | One thing I’ve learned is that | 我学到的一点是 |
| [14:10] | people will often leave clues for you. | 人们总会给你留下线索 |
| [14:12] | You just have to look for them. | 你只需要寻找 |
| [14:15] | This woman’s really into reindeer. | 这女人真的很喜欢驯鹿 |
| [14:17] | She’s one of those year-round Christmas people. | 她是那种一年到头都念叨圣诞节的人 |
| [14:19] | Hey, I’m one of those people. | 我也是这种人 |
| [14:20] | Why is that bad? | 这怎么了 |
| [14:21] | Christmas is magical. | 圣诞节有魔力 |
| [14:22] | Reindeer. | 驯鹿 |
| [14:23] | Reindeer123. | 驯鹿123 |
| [14:25] | Try TigOleReindeer. | 试试提古勒驯鹿 |
| [14:27] | Christmas. | 圣诞节 |
| [14:29] | Christmas123. | 圣诞节123 |
| [14:32] | – Damn, you’re good! – Thank you. | -你可真厉害 -谢谢 |
| [14:35] | Oh, crap! The cops are here! | 该死 警察们来了 |
| [14:36] | We must have tripped the silent alarm | 我们肯定是开门的时候 |
| [14:38] | – when we opened the door. – What are we going to do? | -碰到无声报警器了 -我们该怎么办 |
| [14:39] | Flush the evidence! | 冲掉证据 |
| [14:41] | Sorry. Old habits. | 抱歉 旧习惯 |
| [14:49] | I don’t want to go to jail. | 我不想蹲监狱 |
| [14:51] | Or maybe I do. | 或者我想 |
| [14:52] | It would give me some time away from Grace. | 这能给我点时间远离格蕾丝 |
| [14:54] | She’s killing me. | 她快要弄死我了 |
| [14:55] | Okay, I’m ready for jail. | 好吧 我准备好去监狱了 |
| [14:57] | You think a five-star hotel is going to rehire a felon? | 你觉得五星级酒店会重新雇佣一个罪犯吗 |
| [15:00] | At best, I’ll be managing a four-star hotel, | 我充其量能去管理一家四星级酒店 |
| [15:02] | where the guests can get cereal in the lobby. | 那种客人在大厅就能要麦片粥的 |
| [15:04] | Guys, you two climb out the window and I’ll take the heat. | 你们俩从窗户爬出去 我来顶罪 |
| [15:07] | Martha Stewart went to jail | 玛莎·斯图尔特蹲过监狱 |
| [15:08] | and now she’s got a cooking show with Snoop Dogg. | 而现在她和史努比狗狗拍烹饪秀 |
| [15:10] | I honestly want this. | 我也想要这种 |
| [15:11] | Follow me. | 跟着我 |
| [15:17] | Okay. You can let go. | 好了 你可以放手了 |
| [15:19] | On one. | 一 |
| [15:23] | You good? | 你还好吗 |
| [15:25] | Yeah. | 还好 |
| [15:26] | The alleyway is clear. | 胡同里没人 |
| [15:28] | I can’t believe we’re doing this. | 不敢相信我们在做什么 |
| [15:29] | Katie, this is all on you. | 凯蒂 这都是因为你 |
| [15:31] | I know. I’m such an idiot. | 我知道 我真是个蠢货 |
| [15:33] | – I’m really sorry. – What are you talking about? | -我很抱歉 -你在说什么 |
| [15:35] | This is the most fun I’ve had since I’ve been in Westport. | 这是我来西港之后做过最有趣的事 |
| [15:37] | Yeah. I’d much rather be here | 是啊 我宁愿待在这里 |
| [15:38] | getting in trouble with you guys | 和你们一起惹麻烦 |
| [15:40] | than at home eating a whole bag of potato chips | 也好过在家里一碗一碗地 |
| [15:42] | one small bowl at a time. | 吃完一整袋薯片 |
| [15:43] | C’mon. Give it a try. | 来吧 试试 |
| [15:45] | Oh, Tami, you beautiful, stupid woman. | 塔米 你这个漂亮的笨女人 |
| [16:00] | Dude, don’t give up. | 哥们 别灰心 |
| [16:01] | There’s more to you than just money. | 你不只有钱而已 |
| [16:03] | No. There isn’t. | 不 不是的 |
| [16:05] | I was bred to be rich. I’m a show pony. | 我生来就有钱 我就是个作秀的小马 |
| [16:08] | You can’t put a plow on the back of a show pony. | 你不能让作秀的马来犁地 |
| [16:10] | It’d look ridiculous. | 看着太可笑了 |
| [16:11] | I know you have tons of qualities that money can’t buy. | 我知道你有很多钱买不来的好品质 |
| [16:14] | – Like what? – When I was the new kid, | -比如说 -当我新来时 |
| [16:16] | you became friends with me, even though I wasn’t wealthy. | 你做了我的朋友 即使我没钱 |
| [16:20] | And in a town like Westport, that took character. | 而且在西港这样的小镇 那需要很大勇气 |
| [16:23] | I am good on the inside. | 我确实心地很好 |
| [16:25] | Now do my outside. | 现在夸夸我的外在 |
| [16:26] | Your outfit is fire right now. | 你的外在简直棒极了 |
| [16:28] | Thanks, buddy. | 多谢了 兄弟 |
| [16:29] | Hey, food’s ready. | 饭好了 |
| [16:42] | This is amazing. | 这太棒了 |
| [16:45] | What did you put in these? | 你在里边放了什么 |
| [16:46] | Nothing special. | 没什么特别的 |
| [16:47] | Just four kinds of cheese, | 就是四种芝士 |
| [16:48] | caramelized onions, and a thyme-sage butter I made. | 焦糖洋葱 以及我做的百里香鼠尾草黄油 |
| [16:51] | Oh, my God. Cooper, this is honestly | 天啊 库珀 说真的 |
| [16:53] | the best grilled cheese I’ve ever had. | 这是我吃过的最好吃的烤芝士三明治 |
| [16:55] | – Okay, guys, you don’t have to lie. – We’re not lying. | -好了 各位 你们不用骗我 -我们没说谎 |
| [16:57] | This grilled cheese tastes like the last days of summer, | 这个烤芝士三明治尝起来有夏日尽头的味道 |
| [17:00] | when the sunshine is endless | 阳光无止境 |
| [17:01] | and the lake water is as warm as the air. | 湖水就像空气一样温暖 |
| [17:04] | Deep down, you know life can’t be this beautiful forever, | 心底里 你知道生活不可能一直这么美好 |
| [17:07] | but that’s why you go ahead and take another bite. | 但正因此 你才再来一口 |
| [17:11] | Thank you. | 谢谢你 |
| [17:12] | And you wonder why I love him. | 你们还不理解我为什么爱他 |
| [17:13] | Who taught you to cook like this? | 谁教你这么做的 |
| [17:15] | No one. | 没人教我 |
| [17:16] | I did spend a lot of time | 我确实用了很长时间 |
| [17:17] | watching my family’s personal chef. | 旁观我家的私厨 |
| [17:19] | I must’ve learned from watching. | 我肯定是从看中学到的 |
| [17:20] | Well, I’m impressed. | 我印象很深刻 |
| [17:23] | The texture of your grilled cheese? | 你烤芝士三明治的质地 |
| [17:25] | Exquisite. | 精致 |
| [17:29] | The plating? | 摆盘 |
| [17:31] | Inspired. | 创意 |
| [17:34] | Judges? | 评判 |
| [17:35] | You may unpack your knifes and stay. | 你可以把你的餐刀放好 留下来了 |
| [17:37] | So, wait…I’m a chef? | 等等 我是厨师 |
| [17:43] | I’m a chef. | 我是厨师 |
| [17:45] | You are going to wear the crap | 你穿那些黑白的格子裤 |
| [17:46] | out of those black-and-white checkered pants. | 一定好看哭了 |
| [17:49] | Yeah, I am. | 是的 |
| [17:54] | These are pretty. | 真漂亮 |
| [17:55] | Who sent them? | 谁送来的 |
| [17:56] | Oh, it’s an apology from The Joshes | 乔西们为害我被抓 |
| [17:58] | for getting me busted. | 送来表达歉意的 |
| [18:00] | I hate to admit it, but you were right. | 我讨厌承认 但你是对的 |
| [18:02] | It’s time for me to get some more mature friends. | 我是时候找一些更成熟的朋友们了 |
| [18:05] | “Sorry, Bruh. The Joshes.” | “抱歉 哥们 乔西们” |
| [18:07] | Touching. | 真感人 |
| [18:09] | Actually, Taylor, I think you should stay friends | 实际上 泰勒 我觉得你应该和乔西们 |
| [18:11] | with The Joshes. | 继续做朋友 |
| [18:12] | I was wrong about them. | 我之前看错他们了 |
| [18:13] | So, you don’t think they’re idiots anymore? | 所以你不觉得他们是蠢货了 |
| [18:14] | Oh, no. They’re definitely idiots. | 不 他们绝对是蠢货 |
| [18:16] | But my friendship with J.D. And Tami has taught me | 但我与J.D.和塔米的友谊教会我 |
| [18:19] | that sometimes, idiot friends are the best kind of friends. | 有时候 蠢货朋友们就是最棒的那种朋友 |
| [18:22] | They spice it up and they make life not boring. | 他们让生活更有趣了 |
| [18:25] | But Tami and J.D. Aren’t idiots. | 但J.D.和塔米不是蠢货 |
| [18:27] | No, they’re friends with me. | 不 但他们和我做朋友了 |
| [18:30] | I’m the idiot. | 我是那个蠢货 |
| [18:32] | Walker kept his word. | 沃克保守了承诺 |
| [18:33] | Taylor isn’t in the police blotter. | 泰勒不在警察逮捕记录上了 |
| [18:38] | That is true, | 确实 |
| [18:39] | but did you check the second page? | 但你检查第二页了吗 |
| [18:41] | No. Why? | 没有 怎么了 |
| [18:45] | What the hell is this?! | 这是什么 |
| [18:47] | You were arrested breaking into | 你昨晚因闯入生育诊所 |
| [18:48] | a fertility clinic last night?! | 被逮捕了 |
| [18:49] | Sounds like you know exactly what the hell it is. | 听起来你知道怎么回事 |
| [18:52] | I made a deal with the devil to keep my daughter | 我和魔鬼做了交易 让我女儿不上报 |
| [18:53] | out of the paper only to find my wife in there? | 回头却发现我老婆竟然上了报纸 |
| [18:55] | If it makes you feel any better, | 如果能让你好受点 |
| [18:56] | there won’t be any charges filed. | 之后不会有任何指控的 |
| [18:57] | Or I assume. | 我猜的 |
| [18:58] | I’m kind of treating it like my parking tickets. | 我像对待我的停车罚单一样对待此事 |
| [19:00] | I’ve been a politician for a week, | 我刚做了一周的政客 |
| [19:01] | and I’m already doing crooked deals, | 就已经开始做不正当交易了 |
| [19:03] | and I have a family scandal. | 我还有家庭丑闻 |
| [19:04] | We’re like the Kennedys, | 我们就像肯尼迪家族 |
| [19:05] | without the money or jawline. | 只不过没有他们的钱和下颌轮廓 |
| [19:07] | Who are they? | 他们是谁 |
| [19:14] | What is everyone staring at? | 大家都盯着看什么呢 |
| [19:15] | You. Your arrest | 你 你被逮捕 |
| [19:16] | is all that anyone is talking about right now. | 是现在所有人都在谈论的事 |
| [19:18] | Rumors are flying. | 流言到处飞 |
| [19:19] | People think you were trying to steal information | 人们觉得你想偷信息 |
| [19:21] | so you could sell your eggs on the black market. | 是为了在黑市上卖你的卵子 |
| [19:23] | People have met my children. | 人们见过我的孩子们 |
| [19:24] | No one is buying my eggs. | 没有人会买我的卵子 |
| [19:26] | I’m sorry you got in trouble for nothing. | 抱歉你惹上麻烦 却没有任何收获 |
| [19:27] | It wasn’t for nothing. | 不是什么都没有 |
| [19:28] | What do you mean? | 什么意思 |
| [19:32] | Before the cops came in, I logged back in | 警察进来之前 我重新登入了 |
| [19:34] | to the nurse’s computer and got the addresses of your egg donors. | 护士的电脑 拿到了你捐献人们的地址 |
| [19:37] | Katie, you’re the best. | 凯蒂 你最好了 |
| [19:38] | That’s what idiot friends are for. | 蠢货朋友们不就是用来这样的吗 |
| [19:44] | They’re also good for giving you free muffins. | 他们也会免费给你松饼吃 |
| [19:46] | Yeah, that’s right. I’m a part of this | 没错 我也是一员 |
| [19:47] | whether you want me or not. | 不管你们想不想要 |
| [19:54] | Hamilton Rogers was cited | 汉密尔顿·罗杰斯因使用 |
| [19:56] | for using a gas-powered leaf blower. | 气驱动吹叶机而收到了表彰 |
| [19:58] | This police blotter never disappoints. | 警察逮捕记录从来不让人失望 |
| [20:00] | Courtney Wellington stole American Girl Dolls | 考特尼·惠灵顿从孩子们的捐赠箱里 |
| [20:02] | out of a kids’ donation box? | 偷走了美国女孩洋娃娃 |
| [20:04] | It’s horrible, but, like, so horrible I kind of love it. | 太坏了 但是 坏到我有点喜欢 |
| [20:09] | Jessica Varnacky stabbed her husband! | 杰西卡·万艾可刺伤了她丈夫 |
| [20:12] | Oh. I thought that was gonna be, like, a funny one. | 我还以为会是个好笑的新闻 |
| [20:14] | Anonymous vandal spray paints | 匿名破坏者在”欢迎来西港”的标牌下 |
| [20:16] | “It Sucks” Under “Welcome to Westport” Sign. | 喷上了”真见鬼”的字样 |
| [20:19] | Anonymous vandal? | 匿名破坏者 |
| [20:21] | My dad doesn’t give me credit for anything! | 我爸从来不认可我的任何行为 |
| [20:22] | Maybe he’s trying to protect you? | 也许他是想保护你 |
| [20:24] | No. He’s just not supportive of my art! | 不 他只是不支持我的艺术 |
| [20:35] | Damn it! | 该死 |