| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 | 
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Oh,my God.I love this chicken. | 天呐 鸡肉真好吃 | 
| [00:04] | Oh,you know what they say,best things in life are free. | 俗话说嘛 免费的就是最好的 | 
| [00:09] | Okay,you’re right.I eat your food a lot. | 你说得对 我吃了你不少东西 | 
| [00:11] | Now,how about this?You can raid my fridge anytime you want. | 不如这样 我冰箱里的东西你随便拿 | 
| [00:14] | Oh,that’s very kind of you. | 你人真好 | 
| [00:16] | Next time I have a hankering to wash down a D-cell battery with a jar of old pickle juice, | 下次我想用腌瓜汁洗D型电池时 | 
| [00:21] | I’ll come a-knockin’. | 我会去敲门的 | 
| [00:23] | Hey,Raj,you didn’t send your RSVP in. | 拉杰 你没答复请帖 | 
| [00:26] | I’m suppose to ask you if you’re bringing someone to the wedding. | 我想问下 你要不要带伴来婚礼 | 
| [00:29] | I’ll let you know. | 我会告诉你的 | 
| [00:30] | Well,can you make it soon? | 你能快点吗 | 
| [00:31] | There’s a battle royale going on over the seating charts. | 有人快因为座位表打起来了 | 
| [00:33] | In one corner,Bernadette’s mom,in the other three,mine. | 伯纳黛特她妈位于拳台一角 我妈妈就占了另外三角 | 
| [00:38] | Yeah,I hate wedding receptions. | 我讨厌婚宴 | 
| [00:40] | Yeah,I wish the bride and groom would take a cue from Bilbo Baggins. | 我希望新人们能学学比尔博-巴金斯[魔戒持有者] | 
| [00:43] | Slip on the ring,disappear,and everyone goes home. | 摸摸指环 消失不见 大家回家 | 
| [00:47] | Mm,you liked Professor Geyser’s wedding. | 可你喜欢Geyser教授的婚宴啊 | 
| [00:49] | They had a make-your-own-sundae bar. | 他们有个自助冰淇淋吧 | 
| [00:51] | Oh,that was a night to remember. | 真难以忘怀 | 
| [00:54] | Do you know,on one trip,I just had a bowl of nuts. | 有一次 我就吃了一整碗坚果 | 
| [00:58] | Anyway,you got to let me know if you have a plus one. | 总之 你带伴的话要告诉我 | 
| [01:01] | Because if not,my mom’s trying to sneak in the doctor who sucked the fat out of her neck. | 不然我妈就要把 给她脖子抽脂的医生塞进来了 | 
| [01:10] | All right,uh,fine.I’m coming and I’m bringing somebody. | 好吧 我会去 我也会带个伴 | 
| [01:13] | Uh,Koothrappali plus one. | 库特拉帕里带伴哦 | 
| [01:14] | – Who you bringing? – Who are you bringing?! | -你带谁 -你带谁 | 
| [01:17] | He’s bringing me; who are you bringing? | 他带我 你带谁 | 
| [01:20] | Wow,what a bunch of Nosey O’Donnells. | 你们真是群三姑六婆 | 
| [01:24] | Come on,who is it? | 说嘛 带谁 | 
| [01:26] | I’m not telling. | 我不告诉你 | 
| [01:27] | I’m from Asia,I’m mysterious,deal with it. | 我来自亚洲 很神秘的 忍着吧 | 
| [01:31] | Howard aren’t having a make-your-own-sundae bar? | 霍华德 你们没有自助冰淇淋吧 | 
| [01:34] | I don’t think so. | 应该没吧 | 
| [01:35] | Well,you should. | 应该有的 | 
| [01:36] | 50% of marriages end in divorce,but 100% of make-your-own-sundae bars end in happiness. | 50%的婚姻以离婚收场 但有自助冰淇淋的都很圆满 | 
| [01:44] | hankr.taobao.com | 全民影视屋 | 
| [02:11] | Hello,Mummy,Daddy.How are you? | 爸爸妈妈 你们好吗 | 
| [02:12] | Pretty good.Can’t complain. | 非常好 都没什么好抱怨的 | 
| [02:15] | Oh,I’m sure you can. | 我肯定你有 | 
| [02:16] | Just give it a minute. | 你就抱怨吧 | 
| [02:19] | Listen,uh,there’s something I want to talk to you about. | 我有事要和你们谈谈 | 
| [02:22] | I wasn’t ready until now,but… I think it’s time. | 我之前都没准备好 但我想是时候了 | 
| [02:27] | It’s finally happening. | 终于发生了 | 
| [02:28] | You’re coming out of the closet,aren’t you? | 你要从柜子里出来了 是吧[出柜–表明同志倾向] | 
| [02:31] | We love you,and we accept your alternate lifestyle. | 我们爱你 接受你选择的生活方式 | 
| [02:35] | Just… keep it to yourself. | 不用跟我们说就好 | 
| [02:38] | No,I’m not gay. | 我不是同性恋 | 
| [02:41] | If anything,I’m metrosexual. | 我最多算个潮男而已 | 
| [02:44] | What’s that? | 那是什么 | 
| [02:45] | It means I like women as well as their skin-care products. | 就是说我喜欢女人 也喜欢她们的护肤品 | 
| [02:49] | Well,if you’re not coming out,why did you call us during the cricket semifinals? | 既然你不出柜 那干吗在板球半决赛时叫我们 | 
| [02:53] | I’m tired of trying to meet someone, | 我不想再自己找对象了 | 
| [02:56] | and I think I’d like you to help me find a… a wife. | 我想让你们帮我找个老婆 | 
| [03:03] | And just to clarify… a female wife? | 我问问清楚 女老婆吧 | 
| [03:06] | Yes! | 是的 | 
| [03:09] | Matchmaking – very smart move,son. | 相亲 非常好 儿子 | 
| [03:11] | Much better than marrying for love. | 比自由恋爱好很多 | 
| [03:19] | We married for love. | 我们就是自由恋爱的 | 
| [03:22] | And it’s been wonderful! | 那很棒啊 | 
| [03:27] | Quantum physics makes me so happy. | 量子物理让我好开心 | 
| [03:31] | Yeah,I’m glad. | 这样挺好啊 | 
| [03:33] | It’s like looking at the universe naked. | 好像在看赤身裸体的宇宙 | 
| [03:44] | – Guys got a minute? – Sure.What’s up? | -有时间吗 -什么事 | 
| [03:46] | Well,I was thinking about Sheldon’s little joke the other night about me eating all your food. | 我想了想谢尔顿那晚开玩笑说 我吃光了你们的食物 | 
| [03:51] | That was no joke. | 我没开玩笑 | 
| [03:52] | But… | 但是… | 
| [03:53] | I understand your confusion,as I am our group’s resident cutup. | 我懂你的困惑 因为我是咱们这群人里的开心果 | 
| [03:59] | I’m sorry,you are our resident cutup? | 不好意思 你是开心果 | 
| [04:03] | Yes. | 是啊 | 
| [04:05] | Oh,prove it. | 证明一下 | 
| [04:06] | – Knock-knock.- Who’s there? | -敲门 -谁 | 
| [04:07] | Interrupting physicist. | 插嘴的物理学家 | 
| [04:09] | – Interrupting phys… – Muon! | -插嘴的物… -μ介子 | 
| [04:14] | Anyway,I got a little residual check from my commercial, | 总之 我的广告费还剩下一些 | 
| [04:17] | and I thought,hey,how about I get the guys a little thank you to pay them back? | 我想不如给你们点谢礼 慰劳一下 | 
| [04:21] | So,Sheldon… ta-da! | 谢尔顿 看 | 
| [04:25] | A vintage mint-in-box 1975 Mego Star Trek Transporter with real transporter action. | 原装复古1975版米高牌 星际迷航传送器 还能实现传送操作 | 
| [04:31] | Hot darn! | 深得我心 | 
| [04:34] | Where did you get that? | 在哪买的 | 
| [04:36] | From Stuart,at the comic book store. | 漫画书店 斯图亚特那里 | 
| [04:37] | You went to the comic book store by yourself? | 你自己去漫画书店 | 
| [04:40] | Yeah. | 是啊 | 
| [04:41] | It was fun.I walked in,and two different guys got asthma attacks. | 挺搞笑的 我一进去 两个哥们哮喘病就发作了 | 
| [04:47] | Felt pretty good. | 感觉不错 | 
| [04:49] | This calls for an expression of gratitude. | 这需要表达感谢 | 
| [04:51] | Ooh,am I about to get a rare Sheldon Cooper hug? | 我要得到少有的 谢尔顿·库帕拥抱吗 | 
| [04:54] | No,not this time.Then they wouldn’t be special. | 这次不行 不然就不特殊了 | 
| [04:56] | Thanks,Penny. | 谢谢 佩妮 | 
| [04:59] | You’re welcome. | 不客气 | 
| [05:01] | Don’t worry,I didn’t forget about you. | 别担心 我没忘了你哦 | 
| [05:04] | Leonard,I got you… a label-maker! | 莱纳德 我给你买了…标签机 | 
| [05:17] | No,it’s great. | 挺不错的 | 
| [05:18] | Also mint-in-box. | 好歹是原装未开封的 | 
| [05:22] | – And I got you a transporter,too! – Awesome! | -我也给你买了个传送器 -酷毙了 | 
| [05:29] | Look,it was actually designed for my vintage Mr.Spock action figure. | 看啊 这简直是为我的 复古斯波克手办量身打造的 | 
| [05:33] | Oh,that’s great!Let’s open them up and put him in there. | 太棒了 快打开盒子 把它放里面 | 
| [05:35] | – Open it?! – Oh,good Lord,no! | -打开干什么 -天啊 才不要 | 
| [05:37] | Why?They’re just toys. | 为什么 不就是个玩具嘛 | 
| [05:39] | – They’re collectibles.- They’re mint-in-box. | -它们是收藏品 -它们可是原装未开封的 | 
| [05:42] | Come on.Can’t we open one up and take a look? | 就拆一个看看嘛 | 
| [05:43] | No,don’t! | 住手 | 
| [05:45] | Once you open the box,it loses its value. | 盒子一旦开了 分文不值 | 
| [05:48] | Yeah,yeah.My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. | 好吧好吧 我妈也是这样说我的贞操的 | 
| [05:55] | Gotta tell you,it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it. | 我跟你说”开了”以后玩 要有意思得多 | 
| [06:01] | Are you sure you want us here when you meet this woman? | 你确定和她见面时 要我们在场 | 
| [06:04] | Oh,yes. | 是的 | 
| [06:04] | In my culture,it’s expected to have a chaperone to oversee a first date. | 我们的习俗里 首次约会应该有个女伴作陪 | 
| [06:08] | Plus,I want to make a good impression,and no offense, | 再者 我想留个好印象 | 
| [06:10] | but with you guys here,I look like I’m six-two. | 别在意啊 和你俩一比 我看起来有1米88 | 
| [06:16] | The nuns always chaperoned the dances at my high school. | 我们高中舞会时 都是修女监督 | 
| [06:19] | They used to make us leave room between us for the Holy Spirit. | 她们要求我们要在彼此之间 为”圣灵”腾点地方 | 
| [06:23] | Uh,Hindus do the same thing. | 印度教徒也这样 | 
| [06:24] | Except they leave room for a cow. | 不过他们是给牛腾地方 | 
| [06:28] | Listen,I love your charming racist humor, | 听着 我欣赏你那迷人的 种族幽默言论 | 
| [06:30] | but any chance you could not mock my religion while she’s here? | 但她在场时 别嘲笑我的信仰行不 | 
| [06:33] | Yesterday,you made fun of me for eating lox. | 昨天你还嘲笑我吃熏鲑鱼呢 | 
| [06:35] | It’s different,your people don’t worship lox. | 那是两回事 你们犹太人又不崇拜熏鲑鱼 | 
| [06:37] | Clearly,you’ve never been to brunch with my cousins. | 显然你没和我的堂兄弟们 吃过早午饭 | 
| [06:41] | So,arranged marriages – the parents just decide and then you have to get married? | 所谓的家庭包办婚姻 就是父母决定 你就必须结婚吗 | 
| [06:45] | No,no,I get a say in it. | 不 我有发言权的 | 
| [06:47] | But I’m sure whoever shows up will be better company | 但我确定和这人在一起 | 
| [06:49] | than the threesome I’ve been having with Aunt Jemima and Mrs.Butterworth. | 总比让我跟阿香婆和老干妈三P强 | 
| [06:55] | Excuse me,are you Rajesh? | 不好意思 你是拉杰吗 | 
| [06:56] | Ah,yes. | 是的 | 
| [06:57] | You must be Lakshmi. | 你一定是拉克希米 | 
| [06:59] | Uh,nice to meet you. | 幸会 幸会 | 
| [07:00] | Nice to meet you,too. | 彼此彼此 | 
| [07:02] | These are my friends. | 他们是我朋友 | 
| [07:04] | – This is Bernadette. – Hello. | -这是伯纳黛特 -嗨 | 
| [07:05] | And this is Howard. | 这是霍华德 | 
| [07:06] | – Nice to meet you. – You,too. | -很高兴认识你 -我也是 | 
| [07:08] | Please,have a seat. | 请坐 | 
| [07:10] | I’m thinking double wedding. | 我已经在考虑和你们一起办婚礼啦 | 
| [07:17] | Dr. Cooper. | 库帕博士 | 
| [07:22] | Dr. Cooper? | 库帕博士 | 
| [07:25] | Is someone there? | 谁啊 | 
| [07:26] | Down here.On your desk. | 往下看 在你桌上 | 
| [07:33] | Spock? | 斯波克 | 
| [07:34] | I need to speak with you. | 我得和你谈谈 | 
| [07:38] | Fascinating. | 真有趣 | 
| [07:40] | The only logical explanation is that this is a dream. | 唯一合理的解释就是 我在做梦 | 
| [07:44] | It is not the only logical explanation. | 那可不一定 | 
| [07:47] | For example,you could be hallucinating after being hit on the head by,say,a coconut. | 比如 你可能被颗椰子砸头后 出现了幻觉 | 
| [07:55] | Was I hit on the head by a coconut? | 我真被椰子砸头了 | 
| [07:58] | I am not going to dignify that with a response. | 我保持沉默 这不是什么光荣事 | 
| [08:02] | Now to the matter at hand. | 现在说正事 | 
| [08:04] | You need to play with the transporter toy. | 你得玩那传送器玩具 | 
| [08:07] | But it’s mint-in-box. | 可那是原装未开封的 | 
| [08:08] | Yes. | 是的 | 
| [08:09] | And to open it would destroy its value. | 一旦打开便分文不值 | 
| [08:12] | But remember,like me,you also have a human half. | 但你要记住 和我一样 你也有一半人类的血统 | 
| [08:16] | Well,I’m not going to dignify that with a response. | 这下轮到我保持沉默了 | 
| [08:20] | Consider this. | 想想看 | 
| [08:23] | What is the purpose of a toy? | 玩具存在的意义是什么 | 
| [08:25] | To be played with. | 被玩 | 
| [08:26] | Therefore,to not play with it would be…? | 所以 不玩它意味着什么 | 
| [08:29] | Illogical.Damn it,Spock,you’re right. | 不合逻辑 该死 斯波克 你说得对 | 
| [08:34] | I’ll do it. | 我来拆 | 
| [08:35] | Sheldon,wait. | 谢尔顿 且慢 | 
| [08:39] | You have to wake up first. | 你得先醒来 | 
| [08:41] | Oh,of course. | 当然 | 
| [08:42] | Set phasers to dumb,right? | 把激光枪强度调至傻瓜级 对吧 | 
| [08:47] | Goodie,goodie,goodie! | 小兔子乖乖 | 
| [08:51] | This is wrong,this is wrong. | 这样不对 这样不对 | 
| [08:52] | I’m so excited,but this is wrong. | 我好激动 但这是不对的 | 
| [08:58] | I’m going to do it. | 我要拆了 | 
| [08:59] | I’m doing it. | 我在拆 | 
| [09:01] | I did it. | 我拆完了 | 
| [09:08] | That’s what I always thought 1975 smelled like. | 这就是我梦想中1975的气味 | 
| [09:14] | One to beam down,Mr. Scott. | 传送人数一人 史葛先生 | 
| [09:17] | Aye,aye,Mr. Spock. | 收到 斯波克先生 | 
| [09:19] | Energize. | 充能 | 
| [09:25] | Energize. | 充能… | 
| [09:37] | No. No. Don’t be broken. | 不 不 不要坏啊 | 
| [09:39] | Oh,please,don’t be broken. | 千万别坏啊 | 
| [09:44] | What did you make me do?! | 看你都让我做了什么好事 | 
| [09:48] | Okay,okay,think. | 冷静 冷静 开动脑筋 | 
| [09:57] | It’s only logical. | 只有这样才合乎逻辑[斯波克名言] | 
| [10:04] | My goodness,that was delicious. | 天哪 超好吃的 | 
| [10:07] | Well,I hope you saved room for chocolate lava cake. | 希望你还有肚子吃 巧克力熔岩蛋糕 | 
| [10:11] | Impressive. | 妙极了 | 
| [10:12] | What goes into making something like that? | 这要怎么做啊 | 
| [10:15] | Well,you start out by trying to make chocolate souffl, | 首先得尝试做巧克力蛋奶酥 | 
| [10:18] | and when it falls,you panic,quickly change the name,and voila,lava cake. | 然后它垮了 你慌了 赶快改名字 就成熔岩蛋糕了 | 
| [10:23] | I bet our parents are dying to know how things are going here. | 我敢说爸妈们正着急 我俩进展如何呢 | 
| [10:26] | Well,let’s see. | 比比看 | 
| [10:30] | Yep,three missed calls. | 没错 三个未接来电 | 
| [10:32] | Four missed calls,two text messages and a failed video chat. | 四个未接来电 两条信息 一条视频聊天请求未果 | 
| [10:35] | I win! | 我赢喽 | 
| [10:36] | So,what are we going to tell them? | 怎么和他们说 | 
| [10:40] | I’d like to tell them things are going well. | 我会说进展不错 | 
| [10:42] | Me,too. | 我也这么说 | 
| [10:43] | But before we get their hopes up,we should probably make sure we’re on the same page. | 在让他们抱过高期望之前 我们应该达成共识先 | 
| [10:48] | Okay. | 好的 | 
| [10:50] | What page are you on? | 你什么想法 | 
| [10:52] | I’m on the one where I’m under a lot of pressure from my parents to get married and settle down | 父母给我压力很大 老催我赶紧结婚 安定 生子 | 
| [10:59] | and have a family,and I’m going to do it so they don’t find out I’m gay. | 我得抓紧 不然他们就会发现我是同志了 | 
| [11:05] | Say again? | 什么 | 
| [11:07] | I’m gay. | 我是同志 | 
| [11:09] | Like… dude-on-dude,but with women? | 像…男人和男人 你和女人 | 
| [11:14] | I know a fake marriage isn’t an honest way to live, | 我知道假结婚不太好 | 
| [11:16] | but you of all people should know how difficult it is to come out in our culture. | 但你也应该知道 我们这种文化背景的有多难出柜 | 
| [11:20] | Why me of all people?! | 我怎么就知道了 | 
| [11:23] | Well,there’s a rumor back in New Delhi that you’re– | 在新德里大家都说你是… | 
| [11:26] | how shall we say– comfortable in a sari. | 怎么说呢 披纱着锦的 | 
| [11:30] | I’m not gay! | 我不是同志 | 
| [11:32] | Really? | 确定 | 
| [11:33] | The chocolate lava cake,the little soaps in the bathroom,and I’m sorry, | 巧克力熔岩蛋糕 浴室里的小香皂 | 
| [11:36] | but you’re wearing more perfume than I am. | 不好意思 你身上的香水比我还多 | 
| [11:39] | That’s Unbreakable by Khloe and Lamar. | 这是科勒和拉玛尔设计的”情比金坚” | 
| [11:43] | And for your information,it’s unisex. | 而且是男女通用的 | 
| [11:47] | Fill in the blank. | 填词游戏 | 
| [11:48] | – I love the nightlife… – I like to boogie. | -我喜欢夜生活… -我喜欢跳布吉舞 | 
| [11:51] | Got you. | 露馅了吧 | 
| [11:52] | With women!I like to boogie with women! | 和女人 我喜欢和女人跳布吉舞 | 
| [11:56] | That’s disappointing. | 太令我失望了 | 
| [11:57] | You were exactly the kind of phony-baloney husband I was looking for. | 我以为你是我追寻的 那种假婚老公呢 | 
| [12:02] | Thank you. | 谢谢 | 
| [12:04] | And once again,my baloney likes girls. | 再次重申 我的”香肠”喜欢女孩 | 
| [12:09] | W-W-Wait! | 等等 | 
| [12:10] | You don’t want to put a bite of that in your mouth without trying my homemade Chantilly cream | 你得就着我亲手制作的 奶油巧克力酱吃 | 
| [12:15] | Yeah,okay,that time I heard it. | 好吧 这次我知道了 | 
| [12:31] | Oh,dear. | 哦 天哪 | 
| [12:34] | Two suns and no sunscreen. | 两个太阳 没带防晒霜 | 
| [12:41] | Hello again,Sheldon. | 我们又见面了 谢尔顿 | 
| [12:45] | What is it now,Tiny Spock? | 又什么事 迷你斯波克 | 
| [12:48] | I am very disappointed in you. | 我对你非常失望 | 
| [12:50] | You broke your toy and switched it with Leonard’s. | 你弄坏了你的玩具 然后把莱纳德的换过来 | 
| [12:53] | You should be ashamed of yourself. | 应该感到羞耻 | 
| [12:55] | You’re the one who told me to play with it. | 是你让我打开来玩的 | 
| [12:57] | If I told you to jump off the bridge of the Enterprise,would you do it? | 要是我叫你从”进取号”舰桥上往下跳 你也跳 | 
| [13:02] | Oh,if I got on the bridge of the Enterprise,I would never,ever leave. | 要是有幸能来到”进取号”的舰桥 我死也不走了 | 
| [13:07] | Trust me,it gets old after a while. | 相信我 过一阵新鲜劲就没了 | 
| [13:13] | You must right your wrongs,Sheldon. | 你必须更正你的错误 谢尔顿 | 
| [13:15] | Why? | 为什么 | 
| [13:16] | I got away with it. | 这样谁也没损失 | 
| [13:17] | Leonard has his toy,and he’s never going to open it, | 莱纳德依旧有他的玩具 永远不会打开 | 
| [13:20] | so he won’t know it’s broken. | 所以也不会知道坏掉没 | 
| [13:22] | And I have a toy that isn’t broken. | 我的玩具没坏 | 
| [13:24] | Everybody’s happy. | 大家都开心 | 
| [13:26] | Well,I am unhappy. | 我不开心 | 
| [13:27] | I thought where you come from they don’t have emotions. | 我以为你们那的人没有情绪呢 | 
| [13:31] | I come from a factory in Taiwan. | 我从台湾的工厂来 | 
| [13:36] | Now,do the right thing. | 现在 做你该做的吧 | 
| [13:37] | You know what you are? | 你知道你是什么吗 | 
| [13:39] | Well,you’re a green-blooded buzz kill. | 就是个绿血的讨厌鬼 | 
| [13:42] | Perhaps it’s time you beam on out of here. | 你该传送走了 | 
| [13:45] | Fine. | 好吧 | 
| [13:45] | I will just use the transporter. | 我用传送器好了 | 
| [13:48] | Oh,right. | 哦 对了 | 
| [13:49] | You broke it. | 被你弄坏了 | 
| [13:53] | Very well. | 非常好 | 
| [13:54] | Cooper to Enterprise,one to beam up. | 库帕家到进取号 传送人数一人 | 
| [13:58] | Energize. | 充能 | 
| [14:10] | Tiny Spock,help. | 迷你斯波克 救命 | 
| [14:18] | Ready for lunch? | 吃饭吗 | 
| [14:19] | Yeah,one sec. | 恩 等一下 | 
| [14:22] | Oh,good. | 哦 太好了 | 
| [14:23] | Ma would’ve killed me if she found out I broke my retainer. | 我妈要是发现我弄坏牙套 我就死定了 | 
| [14:28] | Hey,uh… can I run something by you? | 嘿 能跟你说些事吗 | 
| [14:30] | It’s about Lakshmi. | 关于拉克希米的 | 
| [14:32] | Yeah,sure.How are things going? | 当然 没问题 进展如何 | 
| [14:34] | We hit a couple of bumps. | 不太顺利 | 
| [14:35] | She lives over in Manhattan Beach,so it takes,like,an hour to get there. | 她住曼哈顿 到那得一小时 | 
| [14:39] | And she’s a lesbian. | 然后她是拉拉 | 
| [14:42] | What do you mean,”she’s a lesbian”? | “她是拉拉” 什么意思 | 
| [14:44] | Well,you know how whenever you and I would try to hit on women in bars | 你记得我们在酒吧和美眉搭讪 | 
| [14:48] | and they’d blow us off and then we’d tell each other they were probably gay? | 她们不理我们 我们就说也许她们是同性恋 | 
| [14:51] | It’s like that. | 像那样 | 
| [14:52] | Except this time,it’s true. | 只是这次是真的 | 
| [14:56] | Then why did she even go out with you? | 那她干吗和你约会 | 
| [14:58] | She was looking for a husband so she can appear to be straight. | 她想找个假老公装异性恋 | 
| [15:01] | And,you know,it sounded crazy to me at first… | 刚开始我还觉得 这疯了吧 | 
| [15:05] | but I’m actually thinking about doing it. | 但现在我想考虑下 | 
| [15:08] | Okay,so the reason that might sound crazy… | 好吧 你开始觉得疯了是因为… | 
| [15:12] | is ’cause it’s crazy! | 这本来就是疯了 | 
| [15:14] | Look,Howard,you’re in a relationship. | 霍华德 你有女朋友 | 
| [15:16] | You know you have to make compromises. | 你有时候也得做出妥协 | 
| [15:18] | Yes,but my compromises are about which bedspread to buy | 是的 但我妥协的是 买什么样的床单 | 
| [15:22] | or whose turn it is to do the laundry,Bernadette’s or my mom’s. | 谁该洗衣服 伯纳黛特还是我妈 | 
| [15:29] | It’s a great deal. | 这是件好事 | 
| [15:30] | We both get our parents off our backs, | 我们都有父母的压力 | 
| [15:32] | I don’t have to come home to an empty apartment every night. | 我也不用再每晚独守空房 | 
| [15:35] | Plus,once I’m married,I can finally eat carbs again and let myself go. | 而且我结了婚就可以吃碳水化合物 不用担心变胖了 | 
| [15:41] | Why don’t you tell your parents you want to try to find someone else? | 为什么你不告诉你爸妈 你觉得这人不合适呢 | 
| [15:45] | Maybe one who hasn’t slept with more woman than you. | 起码找个睡的女人比你少的 | 
| [15:49] | Because this one wants to marry me. | 因为她想和我结婚 | 
| [15:51] | I might never find another one who does. | 我也许找不到 其他想和我结婚的人了 | 
| [15:53] | So you’re seriously thinking about marrying someone you’re never gonna have sex with? | 你真的想要无性婚姻吗 | 
| [15:58] | I can’t believe your attitude. | 我不敢相信你的态度 | 
| [16:00] | I thought you were in favor of gay people getting married. | 我以为你支持同性恋婚姻呢 | 
| [16:04] | Yes,to other gay people! | 是的 但是要同性啊 | 
| [16:07] | Do you hear how homophobic you sound? | 你知道你听起来有多反同吗 | 
| [16:51] | Oh,I don’t want a broken toy. | 我才不要坏了的玩具呢 | 
| [16:57] | Nothing! | 没什么 | 
| [17:01] | What? | 什么 | 
| [17:01] | Nothing. I said nothing. | 没什么 我说没什么 | 
| [17:04] | – That was weird. – Really?I don’t even notice anymore. | -好奇怪 -真的吗 他怎样我都不觉得怪了 | 
| [17:09] | I cannot believe you guys aren’t gonna play with these. | 不敢相信你们不玩这个 | 
| [17:11] | Well,I told you,you don’t. | 我说了 就是不能玩 | 
| [17:12] | It’s mint-in-box. | 这可是原装未开封的 | 
| [17:14] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 | 
| [17:15] | I just think it’s a waste. | 我觉得很浪费 | 
| [17:21] | Relax. | 放松 | 
| [17:23] | I’m just looking at the box. | 我只是在看盒子 | 
| [17:24] | Perhaps you should look with your eyes and not your muscular Nebraska man hands. | 也许你应该用眼睛看 而不是用你那内布拉斯加州男人般的壮手 | 
| [17:30] | What is your problem?! | 你有什么毛病啊 | 
| [17:31] | My problem is that I don’t want you to break Leonard’s toy. | 我就是不想你弄坏他的玩具 | 
| [17:35] | Which you probably did by shaking it! | 说不定你一摇就坏了 | 
| [17:37] | She shook it,we all saw her. | 她摇了 我们都看见了 | 
| [17:40] | Leonard,I bought you this ’cause I wanted you to have fun with it. | 莱纳德 我买是想你玩得开心 | 
| [17:43] | I don’t want it to sit in this box. | 我不想它待在盒子里 | 
| [17:46] | You know,you’re right. | 你是对的 | 
| [17:48] | I mean,it’s from you,I’m never gonna sell it. | 我是说 它是你送的 反正我也不会卖 | 
| [17:51] | I’m opening it. | 我来打开吧 | 
| [17:53] | Yes! | 好的 | 
| [18:05] | – It’s broken. – What? | -坏了 -什么 | 
| [18:06] | Oh,nice job,man hands! | 干得好 男人手 | 
| [18:11] | I didn’t break it. | 不是我弄的啊 | 
| [18:12] | I guess Stuart sold it to me like this. | 我想是斯图亚特卖给我时就这样 | 
| [18:15] | Yes. Yes,he did. | 是的 是的 就是他 | 
| [18:17] | That is a perfectly satisfying and plausible explana… Let’s all be mad at Stuart! | 这是个非常完美合理的解释 大家就生斯图亚特气吧 | 
| [18:23] | You know,I paid a lot for this. | 我花了大价钱买来的 | 
| [18:25] | Let’s take it over there and show him. | 我们带过去给他看看 | 
| [18:27] | Absolutely. | 绝对要去 | 
| [18:31] | Wait! | 等等 | 
| [18:35] | It was me. | 是我 | 
| [18:37] | I opened your toy… discovered it was broken and didn’t tell you. | 我打开了你的玩具 发现它坏了 没有告诉你 | 
| [18:45] | Why would you open mine? | 你为什么打开我的 | 
| [18:47] | I didn’t.That was a lie. | 我没有 我撒谎了 | 
| [18:49] | I opened my own toy… and it was already broken,so I switched them. | 我打开了我的 发现它坏了 我就换了咱们俩的 | 
| [18:55] | You should talk to Stuart. | 那你应该和斯图亚特谈谈 | 
| [18:57] | I can’t,because that was a lie. | 我不能 因为我撒谎了 | 
| [19:00] | Yours was broken in an earthquake– and that’s a lie. | 你的被地震震坏了 我撒谎了 | 
| [19:08] | What is the truth? | 到底怎么回事 | 
| [19:11] | My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream and forced me to open it. | 我的斯波克先生玩偶在梦里 强迫我打开它 | 
| [19:14] | And when the toy broke,I switched it for yours. | 玩具坏了以后 我对调了咱们俩的 | 
| [19:18] | Later,he encouraged me to do the right thing,and I defied him. | 然后 他鼓励我做对的事 我没有听他的 | 
| [19:21] | And then I was attacked by a Gorn. | 然后 我被戈恩族袭击了 | 
| [19:28] | Okay,that I believe. | 好吧 我相信 | 
| [19:31] | Leonard,Penny,I just,I want you both to know that I regret my actions towards the two of you. | 莱纳德 佩妮 我只希望你们相信 我很后悔这么做 | 
| [19:35] | That’s a lie. | 我撒谎了 | 
| [19:38] | So,is that one mine? | 那是我的吗 | 
| [19:41] | Yes. | 是的 | 
| [19:41] | Well,hand it over so I can open it. | 拿过来我打开它 | 
| [19:43] | Okay. | 好 | 
| [19:45] | And,Leonard,even though I don’t have one anymore, | 还有 莱纳德 即使我一个玩具都没有了 | 
| [19:48] | I hope you have fun playing with it. | 我希望你玩得开心 | 
| [19:50] | – And that’s a lie,right? – It’s a big,fat whopper. | -你又撒谎了 对吧 -弥天大谎 | 
| [19:54] | I hope it breaks. | 我希望它已经坏了 | 
| [20:03] | This is a treat. | 我好开心 | 
| [20:04] | What brings you guys by? | 你俩怎么来了 | 
| [20:06] | Raj,Howie told me what’s going on with you and Lakshmi. | 拉杰 豪伊告诉了我 你和拉克希米的事 | 
| [20:09] | You told her? | 你告诉她了 | 
| [20:11] | I told everybody. | 我告诉所有人了 | 
| [20:14] | We believe there’s someone out there who will love you for you. | 我们相信肯定有个真正爱你的人 | 
| [20:17] | Actually,we kind of agreed to disagree on that one, | 事实上 这点上我们的意见 还有点分歧 | 
| [20:20] | but we both think you shouldn’t marry this woman. | 但我们都觉得 你不该和这女人结婚 | 
| [20:23] | So,while I’m waiting for this mysterious perfect match who may or may not exist, | 那我应该等那个 也许存在也许不存在的人来爱我 | 
| [20:28] | I’m supposed to just be alone? | 我注定孤身一人吗 | 
| [20:30] | Not necessarily. | 不一定 | 
| [20:32] | I think we found someone for you to cuddle with. | 我们给你找了个伴 | 
| [20:37] | Oh,my goodness. | 上帝啊 | 
| [20:39] | Aren’t you the cutest little Yorkie ever! | 你真是最萌的约克夏 | 
| [20:45] | You got him for me? | 你们专门给我买的他 | 
| [20:46] | Her. | 是她 | 
| [20:47] | We thought you two would hit it off. | 我们觉得你俩肯定合得来 | 
| [20:49] | I think we already have. | 我觉得我们已经合得来了 | 
| [20:51] | Thank you guys so much. | 谢谢你们俩 | 
| [20:53] | Let’s go see if you fit in my man purse. | 来看看我的包包能装下你不 | 
| [20:59] | Heterosexual,my ass. | 异性恋个屁 |