| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 | 
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Hello, I’m Dr. Sheldon Cooper. | 大家好 我是Sheldon Cooper博士 | 
| [00:05] | Welcome to Sheldon Cooper presents: fun with flags. | 欢迎收看Sheldon Cooper制作: 边玩边学旗帜 | 
| [00:10] | Before we get started, I’d like to announce | 在我们开始之前 我想先宣布 | 
| [00:13] | the winner of our design your own flag competition. | 获得”自制旗帜”比赛的冠军 | 
| [00:16] | But I can’t. | 但我不能 | 
| [00:17] | The only entry was from gameygamer75, | 唯一的投稿人是gameygamer75 | 
| [00:20] | and I know that was a jpeg of your buttocks. | 我知道你投稿的图片是自己屁股的照片 | 
| [00:24] | Now this week we have a very special episode | 这一集非常特别 | 
| [00:27] | where we explore the flags | 我们将探索 | 
| [00:29] | of the popular entertainment franchise, Star Trek. | 著名娱乐节目”星际迷航”里的旗帜 | 
| [00:32] | And to help me, I’m pleased to introduce | 接下来将要介绍本集协助我的 | 
| [00:34] | Internet personality, | 网络达人 | 
| [00:36] | former star of Star Trek: the next generation, | “星际迷航: 下一代”的影星 | 
| [00:39] | and the only guy I know lucky enough to be immortalized | 也是我所知的唯一一个形象被制作成 | 
| [00:42] | in 1/16 scale… set phasers to “fun”… | 缩小模型的幸运儿… 提示”大笑”… | 
| [00:49] | for my friend, Wil Wheaton. | 也是我的好友 Wil Wheaton | 
| [00:54] | Hi, Sheldon. Thanks for having me. | 嗨 Sheldon 谢谢你邀请我 | 
| [00:55] | I’m happy to be here. | 很高兴参加节目 | 
| [00:56] | Cut. | 卡 | 
| [00:58] | What’s wrong? | 怎么了? | 
| [00:59] | Sorry, Sheldon, you were brilliant as always. | 抱歉 Sheldon 你和以往一样棒 | 
| [01:02] | Wil, that was a little wooden. | Wil 你刚才有点僵硬 | 
| [01:06] | Wooden? | 僵硬? | 
| [01:06] | Don’t worry, it wasn’t terrible. | 别担心 不是很糟 | 
| [01:08] | Just, this time, try to say it the way people sound. | 下次想办法跟平时一样 正常对话 | 
| [01:13] | And action. | 开拍 | 
| [01:16] | My friend, Wil Wheaton. | 也是我的好友 Wil Wheaton | 
| [01:18] | Hi, Sheldon. Thanks for having me. | 嗨 Sheldon 谢谢你邀请我 | 
| [01:19] | I’m excited to be here. | 我很高兴能上节目 | 
| [01:20] | So, Wil, what do you have for us first? | Wil 你给大家带来了什么? | 
| [01:23] | Well, this is an exciting one. | 这面旗帜非常有意思 | 
| [01:25] | This is the flag of the United Federation of Planets. | 这是星际联邦的旗帜 | 
| [01:27] | – Now what’s interesting about this flag… – Cut. | – 这面旗帜的有趣之处在于… – 卡 | 
| [01:31] | What was wrong with that? | 又有什么问题? | 
| [01:33] | It’s called “fun with flags.” | 这节目叫”边玩边学旗帜” | 
| [01:35] | They’re not at half-mast, nobody died. | 又不是死人了 在下半旗 | 
| [01:37] | Let’s try and keep it upbeat. | 想办法愉悦欢快一点 | 
| [01:40] | Um, no offense, | 我不想冒犯 | 
| [01:42] | but I’ve been acting since I was a kid. | 但我从小时候就开始演戏了 | 
| [01:44] | I think I can handle a web show | 我想我可以演好一个网络节目 | 
| [01:45] | without a lot of direction. | 不需要过多的指导 | 
| [01:46] | It’s true. | 这倒是真的 | 
| [01:48] | In 1982, Wil played the voice | 1982年 Wil为”鼠谭秘奇”里的 | 
| [01:50] | of Martin the mouse in the Secret of Nimh. | 那只叫Martin的小老鼠配过音 | 
| [01:52] | You moved me. | 你感动了我 | 
| [01:55] | You’ll have to forgive me. | 你得原谅我 | 
| [01:56] | This is my first time directing, I just want it to be good. | 这是我第一次指导拍摄 我只是想要出个好节目 | 
| [02:00] | So do I. | 我也是 | 
| [02:01] | Great. So, this time let’s try | 太棒了 所以这一次 | 
| [02:02] | more real boy, less Pinocchio. | 多一点真人的感觉 别像匹诺曹那样 | 
| [02:06] | And action. | 开拍 | 
| [02:07] | And cut. | 卡 | 
| [02:10] | You realize that I’m doing this for free, right? | 你也知道我是免费出演 对吧? | 
| [02:12] | Yes. And so far, we’re still not getting our money’s worth. | 没错 到现在为止 我们投下的钱还没见成效 | 
| [02:18] | Let’s try it again. | 再试一次 | 
| [02:21] | Everybody’s having fun. | 大家开心点 | 
| [02:23] | And action. | 开拍 | 
| [02:25] | So, Wil… | 那Wil… | 
| [02:34] | what do you have for us first? | 你给大家带来了什么? | 
| [02:37] | Well, this is an exciting one. | 这面旗帜非常有意思 | 
| [02:41] | This is the flag | 这面是 | 
| [02:42] | of the United Federation of Planets. | 星际联邦的旗帜 | 
| [02:44] | Cut. | 卡 | 
| [02:46] | Problem, first-time director? | 又有问题了吗 大导演? | 
| [02:49] | Oh, none that I could see. | 噢 我可没看出来 | 
| [02:51] | I saw a man who loved flags almost as much as I do. | 我只看到一个跟我一样热爱旗帜的男人 | 
| [02:53] | I got goose bumps. | 我都起鸡皮疙瘩了 | 
| [02:56] | He was overacting on purpose. | 他是故意这么夸张的 | 
| [02:58] | Really? | 真的? | 
| [02:59] | He reminded me of a young William Shatner. | 他让我想起了年轻时候的William Shatner | 
| [03:03] | Listen, Sheldon, I’m really happy | 听着 Sheldon 我非常开心 | 
| [03:04] | to do this for you, but not if she’s gonna be | 能和你一起演出 但如果她一直 | 
| [03:06] | a huge pain in the ass the whole time. | 这么眼中钉的话就不好了 | 
| [03:09] | You gonna let him speak to me like that? | 你竟然允许他这么跟我讲话? | 
| [03:12] | Well… | 呃… | 
| [03:15] | you’re my girlfriend | 你是我女朋友 | 
| [03:17] | and I don’t want you to be upset. | 我不想让你不开心 | 
| [03:19] | Then again, Wil Wheaton’s my friend | 但同样的 Wil Wheaton是我朋友 | 
| [03:20] | and I don’t want him to be upset. | 我也不想让他不开心 | 
| [03:22] | Hmm… | 嗯… | 
| [03:24] | This is a sticky wicket. | 这情况真是胶着 | 
| [03:27] | What do you think? | 你觉得呢? | 
| [03:30] | Can I speak to you for a second? | 我能跟你谈谈吗? | 
| [03:32] | I’ll be right back. | 我马上回来 | 
| [03:34] | Feel free to play with yourself. | 自己嗨一会吧 | 
| [03:43] | I don’t care for your friend, he’s being rude to me. | 我不在乎你的朋友 他对我很粗鲁 | 
| [03:46] | You need to ask him to leave. | 你得让他离开 | 
| [03:47] | Amy, I can’t just ask Wil Wheaton to leave. | Amy 我可不能让他走 | 
| [03:50] | He’s a minor celebrity. | 他可是个小名人 | 
| [03:53] | Once you explain who he is, many people recognize him. | 只要你介绍一下他 很多人都认识他的 | 
| [03:57] | Fine. Then maybe I should go. | 很好 那我走 | 
| [03:59] | Could you? That would solve everything. | 可以吗? 这样事情就解决了 | 
| [04:03] | You are the best. | 你最好了 | 
| [04:05] | I’ll see you at dinner tonight? | 我们今晚一起吃饭吗? | 
| [04:07] | You sure you wouldn’t rather have dinner | 你确定不和你的朋友Wil Wheaton | 
| [04:09] | with your friend Wil Wheaton? | 共进晚餐? | 
| [04:10] | Come to think of it, I would! | 我细想一下 这主意不错! | 
| [04:13] | You, little lady, are on fire. | 妹子 你太棒了 | 
| [04:17] | * Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state * | * 宇宙一度又烫又稠密 * | 
| [04:20] | * Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started… Wait! * | * 140亿年前终于爆了炸… 等着瞧! * | 
| [04:24] | * The Earth began to cool * | * 地球开始降温 * | 
| [04:26] | * The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools * | * 自养生物来起哄 穴居人发明工具 * | 
| [04:29] | * We built the Wall We built the pyramids * | * 我们建长城 我们建金字塔 * | 
| [04:31] | * Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery * | * 数学 自然科学 历史 揭开神秘 * | 
| [04:33] | * That all started with a big bang * | * 一切由大爆炸开始 * | 
| [04:35] | * Bang! * | * 砰! * | 
| [04:47] | Every time we eat dinner here, | 每次我们在这用晚餐 | 
| [04:48] | Your mother refuses to let me help with the dishes. | 你妈总不让我帮她洗盘子 | 
| [04:50] | Don’t take it personally. She likes doing them by herself | 不是针对你的 她就喜欢自己弄 | 
| [04:53] | so she can lick the plates with no one looking. | 这样她舔盘子的行为就不会被看到了 | 
| [04:56] | You ready to go? | 准备好走了吗? | 
| [04:57] | Yeah, let me just grab a couple of fresh turtlenecks. | 嗯 我带几件高领针织衫 | 
| [05:02] | I don’t understand why you keep your stuff here | 家里那么空 | 
| [05:04] | when there’s plenty of room at home. | 干嘛把东西都放这儿呢 | 
| [05:06] | What are you talking about? | 你说啥呢? | 
| [05:07] | All I have here is a few sweaters, | 这儿就是几件毛衣 | 
| [05:10] | books, bank stuff, computers, | 书 银行卡 电脑 | 
| [05:12] | Mail, collectibles, medicine and my electric body groomer. | 邮件 收藏品 药 电子清洁器 | 
| [05:17] | Ooh, there’s my plaid dickie. | 找到我的小领子了 | 
| [05:20] | Oh, got this at the goodwill store for 50 cents. | 从好心二手店淘来的 只要50分 | 
| [05:22] | Can you believe it? | 你敢相信吗? | 
| [05:26] | 50 cents sounds right. | 就值50分 | 
| [05:30] | Let’s go. | 走吧 | 
| [05:32] | You know, it’s kinda late. | 有点晚了 | 
| [05:33] | Why don’t we just spend the night here? | 要不咱们就在这儿过夜吧? | 
| [05:34] | Because we don’t live here. | 我们又不住在这 | 
| [05:36] | I know. | 我知道 | 
| [05:37] | Do you? You said when you got back from space | 你知道? 你从太空回来后 | 
| [05:39] | you were gonna move into my apartment, | 说好搬去我家的 | 
| [05:41] | But half the time we stay here. | 但大半时间却待在这 | 
| [05:43] | That’s not true. | 不对 | 
| [05:45] | Howard, I’m doing laundry! | Howard 我要洗衣服了! | 
| [05:47] | You want me to put anything in for you?! | 你有什么衣服要洗吗?! | 
| [05:49] | There’s some underwear in the hamper! | 洗衣篮里有我内裤! | 
| [05:53] | Oh, good! I got that new stain stick to try out! | 太好了! 正好试试新买的除污剂! | 
| [05:58] | Thank you! I only put it on the list two weeks ago! | 多谢啊! 也就等了整整两周而已! | 
| [06:03] | Okay, I see what you’re getting at. | 好吧 你说得没错 | 
| [06:06] | How about this weekend | 要不这周末 | 
| [06:09] | I’ll box up all my things and move them to our place. | 我把东西打包 全部搬去你家 | 
| [06:14] | Thank you. | 谢谢 | 
| [06:15] | The lightsabers are gonna look great in the living room. | 光剑在客厅会很抢眼的 | 
| [06:18] | Or in the closet. We can decide later. | 也可以放在衣柜里 以后再议 | 
| [06:22] | Howard, help! | Howard 救命! | 
| [06:23] | My hand’s stuck in the garbage disposal! | 我手陷进垃圾桶了! | 
| [06:26] | Let go of whatever piece of food you’re holding! | 放开手里那块食物就好了! | 
| [06:31] | Are you kidding?! | 你开玩笑啊?! | 
| [06:32] | It’s a perfectly good chicken leg! | 这是个完好的鸡腿! | 
| [06:38] | Hey, look who’s out after dark, like a big boy. | 嘿 大半夜还出门 大男孩啊 | 
| [06:41] | I was out raising heck with Mr. Wil Wheaton. | 我刚刚和Wil Wheaton嗨来着 | 
| [06:44] | Four hours more and we would have | 再待四小时 我们俩 | 
| [06:46] | closed down the hometown buffet. | 就能坐到”家常自助”打烊 | 
| [06:49] | I thought you had plans with Amy. | 不是跟Amy约好了嘛 | 
| [06:50] | Yeah, I did, but then Wil called amy a pain in the a-s-s. | 是啊 不过Wil觉得她眼中钉 | 
| [06:56] | She got huffy and left, | 她炸毛了 跑掉了 | 
| [06:57] | then Wil and I headed out to dinner. | 我就和Wil吃晚饭了 | 
| [06:58] | That place really did remind me of my hometown. | 那家店真的挺家常的 | 
| [07:03] | Because there we also have a hometown buffet. | 我家里也有自助 | 
| [07:08] | Hold on. Wil and Amy had an argument? | 等下 Wil和Amy吵架了? | 
| [07:10] | Yes, quite the kerfuffle. | 对 闹挺大的 | 
| [07:12] | Then Amy got mad and left? | 然后Amy生气走了? | 
| [07:14] | Walked right out the door. | 直直地走了 | 
| [07:16] | And you…? | 那你…? | 
| [07:18] | Enjoyed a delightful dinner at a reasonable price. | 在一家物美价廉的餐馆用的晚餐 | 
| [07:22] | The manager recognized Wil | 经理认出了Wil | 
| [07:24] | and let us sit right next to the frozen yogurt machine. | 把我们安排在冻酸奶机旁边 | 
| [07:26] | Right next to it! | 就在旁边喔! | 
| [07:28] | I was closer to it than I am to you right now. | 比此刻我离你的距离还近呢 | 
| [07:34] | Buddy, I think Amy might be upset. | 喂 我觉得Amy可能怒了 | 
| [07:36] | Why’s that? | 为什么? | 
| [07:37] | Because your friend was rude to her, | 因为你朋友对她不好 | 
| [07:39] | and then you went to dinner with him. | 你还跟他去吃晚餐 | 
| [07:42] | You’re just repeating what I said. | 你不就是重复了一遍嘛 | 
| [07:44] | It’s like living with a lactose-intolerant parrot. | 我室友是只乳糖不耐受的鹦鹉 | 
| [07:50] | Trust me, call her. | 信我的 呼叫她 | 
| [07:52] | Fine. It’s a shame you didn’t go to dinner with us, | 好吧 真可惜你没跟我一起吃晚饭 | 
| [07:55] | because the buffet you’re about to enjoy | 一会你就等着吃 | 
| [07:57] | only serves humble pie, | 耻辱大餐吧 | 
| [07:59] | a dessert much less tasty than frozen yogurt. | 比冻酸奶难吃多了 | 
| [08:02] | I was this close. | 我离得就这么近喔 | 
| [08:07] | What? | 咋了? | 
| [08:09] | You’ll appreciate this. | 跟你说个事 | 
| [08:11] | Leonard has some ridiculous notion that you’re mad at me. | Leonard说你生我气 真荒唐 | 
| [08:14] | Tell him you’re not mad at me. | 告诉他你没生气 | 
| [08:15] | Go ahead, set him straight. | 快 实话告诉他 | 
| [08:17] | I’m mad at you, Sheldon. | 我对你生气了 Sheldon | 
| [08:19] | Hmm. Eat one of your luna bars. | 嗯 吃一块月亮巧克力 | 
| [08:24] | Very often when women think they’re angry, | 女人经常以为自己生气 | 
| [08:26] | they’re really just hungry. | 其实只是饿了 | 
| [08:29] | I’m not hungry. | 我不饿 | 
| [08:32] | Your friend insulted me, and you didn’t do anything. | 你朋友侮辱我 你却什么也不做 | 
| [08:34] | Precisely, I didn’t do anything. | 对嘛 我可什么也没做 | 
| [08:39] | Now does someone feel like checking her emotional math? | 某人是不是该理理自己的情绪呢? | 
| [08:43] | Keep going, buddy, you’re doing great. | 接着说 亲 你最棒了 | 
| [08:46] | Sheldon, I’m your girlfriend, | Sheldon 我是你女友 | 
| [08:47] | and you should have taken my side. | 你应该站我这边 | 
| [08:49] | That’s it. End of story. Good night. | 就这样 说完了 晚安 | 
| [08:54] | Wow, Amy’s mad and Leonard was right. | Amy生气了 Leonard说得对 | 
| [08:59] | What a weird day. | 今天真诡异 | 
| [09:03] | Hey. Sorry this took so long. | 嘿 抱歉上菜晚了 | 
| [09:05] | But you used to work here, you know how it is. | 你以前在这工作的 你懂的 | 
| [09:07] | Kitchen slammed again? | 厨房又关了? | 
| [09:08] | No, I’m a terrible waitress, remember? | 不 因为我不善招待 记得不? | 
| [09:13] | So, is there anything I can do | 明天要不要我 | 
| [09:14] | to help you with the move tomorrow? | 去帮你搬家? | 
| [09:15] | Now that you mention it, | 说到这个 | 
| [09:17] | I was thinking tomorrow might not be great. | 我在想明天不是个好时候 | 
| [09:20] | What’s your excuse this time? | 又是什么理由? | 
| [09:22] | No excuse. It’s just, you know, I’m Jewish, and technically, | 不是理由 我是犹太人 理论上说 | 
| [09:25] | We’re not supposed to drive or carry anything on the sabbath. | 安息日我们不搬东西不开车的 | 
| [09:28] | So this one’s on god. | 这是天注定的 | 
| [09:32] | That might be a little more convincing | 要是你没有一嘴的培根芝士汉堡 | 
| [09:33] | if you didn’t have a mouthful of bacon cheeseburger. | 我还能更信你一点 | 
| [09:37] | My religion’s kinda loosey-goosey. | 我的宗教不那么严格嘛 | 
| [09:39] | Basically, as long as you got your schmekel clipped | 基本上 切了包皮 | 
| [09:42] | and don’t wear a cross, you’re good. | 不戴十字架 就行了 | 
| [09:46] | Howie, you promised you’d move. | Howie 你说会搬的 | 
| [09:47] | And I will. | 会搬的 | 
| [09:49] | Yeah, right. | 那可不 | 
| [09:50] | I will. I’m obviously not going to live in my mother’s house | 会搬的 我又不可能一辈子 | 
| [09:52] | for the rest of my life. I’m not a child. | 都住我妈家 我又不是小孩 | 
| [09:55] | I’ve seen her burp you. | 你打嗝都得她帮忙 | 
| [10:00] | She did not burp me. | 才不是呢 | 
| [10:02] | She was patting me on the back, and I happened to burp. | 她只是拍我背 我恰巧打了个嗝 | 
| [10:08] | Don’t you have other tables you should be waiting on? | 你不用去招待别桌吗? | 
| [10:10] | Yeah, but I told you, I’m not good at my job. | 不是说了吗 我不是个好服务员 | 
| [10:13] | Bernadette, listen to me. | Bernadette 听我说 | 
| [10:14] | He is never gonna leave. | 他不会搬走的 | 
| [10:15] | I’m starting to think you’re right. | 我开始觉得你说得对了 | 
| [10:17] | All right, I’ve had enough of this. | 我受够了 | 
| [10:19] | I’m a grown man, I have a successful career. | 我成熟 有份成功的事业 | 
| [10:22] | For the love of god, I’ve been to space! | 而且 天呐 我去过太空! | 
| [10:24] | I will move out when I’m ready, | 我想搬走就搬走 | 
| [10:25] | and I don’t need anyone badgering me into it! | 不需要别人不停来烦我! | 
| [10:29] | Wow, excuse me. | 我先走了 | 
| [10:33] | That was just for her benefit. | 我刚是吓她的 | 
| [10:34] | I’ll move tomorrow. I love you. Don’t leave me. | 我明天就搬 我爱你 别离开我 | 
| [10:41] | Amy. | Amy啊 | 
| [10:42] | Amy. | Amy啊 | 
| [10:45] | Angry Amy. | 生气的Amy啊 | 
| [10:48] | What? | 咋了? | 
| [10:50] | I’ve been thinking about what happened, | 我一直在想之前的事 | 
| [10:52] | and I hope this gift | 我希望这份礼物 | 
| [10:54] | will make things better. | 能宽你的心 | 
| [10:58] | Star Trek DVDs? | “星际迷航”光碟? | 
| [11:01] | Why would I want this? | 给我干嘛? | 
| [11:03] | First of all, you’re welcome. | 首先 不用谢 | 
| [11:06] | Furthermore, not being familiar | 其次 若没看过 | 
| [11:08] | with Wil Wheaton’s body of work, | Wil Wheaton的作品 | 
| [11:09] | there was no way for you to know | 你哪会知道 | 
| [11:11] | you were being rude to a national treasure. | 你侵犯了这位国宝人物呢 | 
| [11:14] | Get ready for 130 hours of “I told you so.” | 130小时的震撼 如我所说地等着你 | 
| [11:22] | Fine. | 好吧 | 
| [11:23] | I’ll just tell you what happens. | 那我来口述吧 | 
| [11:28] | Fade in. | 画面淡入 | 
| [11:30] | The new enterprise heads out on its maiden voyage | 崭新的进取号开始了她的处女航 | 
| [11:32] | to contact the bandi people of deneb iv. | 试图联络deneb四号星球上的班迪人 | 
| [11:35] | Enter Wesley Crusher, played by my buddy… | 镜头拉近Wesley Crusher 由我的好朋友扮演… | 
| [11:43] | She’s hooked. | 她上钩了 | 
| [11:57] | Wow. | 哇 | 
| [11:58] | An end of an era. | 一个时代的终结 | 
| [11:59] | Boy, if these walls could talk. | 若墙壁会说话 | 
| [12:04] | They’d say, “why does he touch himself so much?” | 他们会说 “这丫怎么总在撸?” | 
| [12:13] | Yeah. | 对啊 | 
| [12:16] | I can’t believe I’m not going to live here anymore. | 真不敢相信 我就要离开了 | 
| [12:20] | This has always been my bedroom. | 我从小就住这儿 | 
| [12:23] | Right here is where my mom used to mark my height. | 这儿是我妈给我画的身高尺 | 
| [12:27] | Oh, yeah. | 对啊 | 
| [12:29] | Fifth grade. | 五年级 | 
| [12:30] | Sixth grade. | 六年级 | 
| [12:31] | Seventh grade. | 七年级 | 
| [12:32] | Eighth grade. | 八年级 | 
| [12:33] | Ninth grade. | 九年级 | 
| [12:37] | I remember when I was five, | 还记得我五岁的时候 | 
| [12:40] | hiding under this desk with all my halloween candy. | 抱着万圣节糖果藏桌子底下 | 
| [12:43] | Had some peanut m&m’s, | 里面有花生彩虹糖 | 
| [12:46] | went into my first anaphylactic shock | 那是我第一次过敏 | 
| [12:50] | and had to be rushed to the hospital. | 被慌忙送去了医院 | 
| [12:51] | Came home, celebrated with a snickers, | 好不容易回来 吃了块士力架庆祝 | 
| [12:53] | went into my second anaphylactic shock. | 那是我第二次过敏 | 
| [12:57] | When did you figure out you were allergic to nuts? | 你什么时候才发现你对坚果过敏? | 
| [12:59] | Sometime around the third almond joy. | 大概是吃第三块果仁巧克力之后 | 
| [13:03] | Okay. | 好吧 | 
| [13:04] | You want to start loading this stuff into the truck? | 把箱子搬上卡车? | 
| [13:06] | Yeah, I guess. | 是时候了 | 
| [13:08] | Hey, would you do me a favor? | 再帮我一次? | 
| [13:10] | Go on ahead. | 你们先走 | 
| [13:11] | I just want one last moment alone in my old room. | 我想再看看这个老屋子 | 
| [13:16] | We’re not standing outside by the u-haul | 我们才不会站在搬家公司旁 | 
| [13:18] | while you fondle yourself. | 等你撸完呢 | 
| [13:23] | Fine, let’s go. | 好吧 走吧 | 
| [13:31] | Hey. | 嘿 | 
| [13:32] | What brings you in? | 你怎么来了? | 
| [13:33] | Penny, if you wouldn’t mind, | Penny 你不介意的话 | 
| [13:35] | I’d like to have a conversation about girls. | 我想跟你谈谈女生 | 
| [13:40] | I had a feeling we’d have a talk like this sooner or later. | 我预感到会有这么一天的 | 
| [13:44] | Are you finally getting fuzz in weird places? | 奇怪的地方长毛了? | 
| [13:48] | Penny, please, | Penny 别闹 | 
| [13:49] | I’m on the horns of a relationship dilemma. | 我现在处于感情危机中 | 
| [13:52] | And for the record, I had a full pubis of hair | 顺便说一句 我十九岁的时候 | 
| [13:54] | by the time I was 19. | 阴部就长全了毛 | 
| [13:58] | And for the record… | 顺便说一句… | 
| [14:02] | So what are you drinking? | 你要喝啥? | 
| [14:04] | Well, it’s been a rough day. | 今天挺难过的 | 
| [14:05] | I usually go chamomile tea, | 日常一直是喝甘菊茶 | 
| [14:07] | but I don’t think that’s going to cut it. | 今天不够劲 | 
| [14:09] | You could have a long island iced tea. | 要不来个长岛冰茶(失身酒) | 
| [14:15] | Will that calm my nerves? | 能让我安神吗? | 
| [14:18] | It’s calmed the pants off me a couple of times. | 有几次把我裤子安下来了 | 
| [14:22] | Sold. | 成交 | 
| [14:23] | Oh. | 喔 | 
| [14:25] | So, the heart you got from the wizard giving you trouble? | 你这个铁石心肠也有感情问题? | 
| [14:29] | The trouble isn’t with me, Penny, | 不是我出问题 Penny | 
| [14:31] | It’s with your gender. | 是你们女性 | 
| [14:33] | Someday, scientists will discover | 总有一天 科学家会发现 | 
| [14:34] | that second x chromosome contains nothing | 你们多出的那条X染色体 | 
| [14:36] | but nonsense and twaddle. | 里面只有胡搅蛮缠 | 
| [14:39] | Yeah, Amy told me what happened. | 嗯 Amy把事告诉我了 | 
| [14:41] | Look, just apologize. | 道歉去 | 
| [14:43] | It’ll warm her twaddle. | 她就不会蛮缠了 | 
| [14:46] | It’s a band-aid at best. | 治标不治本 | 
| [14:47] | The core problem is that Amy and Wil do not like each other. | 本质问题是Amy和Wil合不来 | 
| [14:51] | Which is baffling because they’re both crazy about me. | 这很奇怪啊 他们都爱我嘛 | 
| [14:56] | And I like them, | 我也喜欢他们 | 
| [14:57] | which indicates they’re bright and interesting | 这说明他们都聪明睿智有趣 | 
| [14:59] | and/or were on Star Trek. | 且或出演了”星际迷航” | 
| [15:03] | Honey, you can’t make people like each other. | 强扭的瓜不甜 | 
| [15:05] | Not true. | 不对 | 
| [15:06] | Leonard made me like you. | Leonard强扭我喜欢你 | 
| [15:09] | And let me tell you, that was a hard row to hoe. | 我跟你说 这可不是一般难 | 
| [15:12] | Cheers, pal. | 干杯 伙计 | 
| [15:16] | Ooh. | 喔 | 
| [15:18] | Boy, that is a treat that’s hard to beat. | 这茶真是与众不同啊 | 
| [15:22] | Get the mad hatter on the horn, I’m having a tea party. | 让疯帽子赶紧来 我这儿开茶话会啦 | 
| [15:32] | You might want to pace yourself. | 你慢点喝 | 
| [15:34] | I drink tea all the time. | 茶我天天喝 | 
| [15:35] | I think I know what I’m doing. | 我很清楚自己 | 
| [15:38] | Far be it from me to criticize a man with a full pubis. | 我有啥资格来管一个阴毛长全的汉子呢 | 
| [15:44] | Look, Sheldon, your problem is not Wil Wheaton, okay? | Sheldon 问题不在于Wil Wheaton 好吗? | 
| [15:46] | Your problem is the way you treated Amy. | 问题在于你对待Amy的态度 | 
| [15:49] | My problem is I’m out of tea. | 问题在于茶喝完了 | 
| [15:53] | Come on, someone insulted | 别人侮辱了你女友 | 
| [15:54] | your girlfriend and you just let him do it. | 你还放任自由 | 
| [15:56] | I thought you Texas guys stood up for your womenfolk. | 我以为你们德州男人为女人出生入死呢 | 
| [15:59] | Penny, please, | Penny 得了吧 | 
| [16:00] | I think I’ve evolved beyond my simple rustic upbringing. | 我比家乡人进化多了 | 
| [16:04] | Sorry. | 抱歉 | 
| [16:05] | On the other hand, that low-down polecat done wronged my woman. | 话说回来 那臭男人欺负我女人 | 
| [16:12] | Welcome to long island, tex. | 欢迎来到长岛 德州汉 | 
| [16:16] | Amy deserves better. | Amy不能被这么对待 | 
| [16:18] | You know, when we buy the planter’s deluxe mix, | 每次买一罐”绅士”多口味豪华装 | 
| [16:21] | She eats all the brazil nuts so I don’t have to look at them. | 她都会把那些我无法直视的巴西坚果吃完 | 
| [16:25] | She’s a uniq blend of saint and squirrel. | 她真是只天使心的松鼠 | 
| [16:29] | Yeah, that she is. | 说的没错 | 
| [16:31] | Here you go. | 给你 | 
| [16:32] | I’m a callous egomaniac. | 我真是个自大的负心汉 | 
| [16:34] | She’s gonna leave me. | 她会离开我的 | 
| [16:35] | No, she won’t. | 不会的 | 
| [16:36] | No, she won’t. I’m great. | 嗯 她不会的 我超棒 | 
| [16:50] | Okay, I have now | 好的 现在 | 
| [16:52] | officially moved out of my mother’s house. | 我正式搬出我妈房子了 | 
| [16:55] | You are now the only woman in my life | 从今往后 浴室里就能 | 
| [16:57] | who I’ll see naked in the bathroom. | 只看见你的裸体了 | 
| [17:00] | I know this wasn’t easy. | 我明白这很难 | 
| [17:02] | You doing okay? | 你还好吗? | 
| [17:03] | Oh, I’m fine. | 我没事 | 
| [17:04] | It’s just her I’m worried about. | 我有点担心她 | 
| [17:06] | Aw, she’ll be okay. | 她没事的 | 
| [17:08] | – She’s a grown woman. – I know. | – 她成熟了 – 我明白 | 
| [17:10] | It’s just ever since my dad left, | 只不过 我爸走后 | 
| [17:12] | I’ve felt responsible for her. | 我总觉得我要对她负责 | 
| [17:15] | That’s a lot for a kid to deal with. | 对你这个孩子来说太难了 | 
| [17:18] | She was just so sad all the time. | 她总是很悲伤 | 
| [17:20] | Yeah, I was the only person who could cheer her up. | 只有我能让她开心 | 
| [17:24] | Well, me and ben and jerry. | 我 “本和杰里”冰淇淋 | 
| [17:27] | She’s lucky you were there. | 有你在是她的福分 | 
| [17:31] | You know, she’s why I first got into magic. | 我是因为她才开始表演魔术的 | 
| [17:35] | I would do little shows for her, | 当时我给她表演小魔术 | 
| [17:36] | hang up a bedsheet like it was a curtain, | 挂一张床单当窗帘用 | 
| [17:40] | put on a top hat and cape. | 戴个高帽子 披个斗篷 | 
| [17:42] | And part way through the act, | 演到一半 | 
| [17:44] | I would say I needed a volunteer from the audience | 我会说我需要观众来互动 | 
| [17:48] | to be my beautiful assistant | 当我美丽的助手 | 
| [17:50] | and invite her up on stage. | 把她请上舞台 | 
| [17:54] | I can still remember the way she’d smile. | 我还记得她的笑容 | 
| [17:58] | For a few minutes, she’d… | 就那么一刻 她… | 
| [18:00] | forget how lonely she was. | 忘记了孤单 | 
| [18:05] | Aw, crap. | 讨厌 | 
| [18:06] | Let’s go. | 走吧 | 
| [18:09] | Where we going? | 去哪? | 
| [18:10] | Grab a box. | 搬盒子 | 
| [18:11] | We’ll sleep at your mother’s place tonight. | 今晚去你妈那儿睡 | 
| [18:13] | No, but I want to live here. | 不 我想住这儿 | 
| [18:15] | Well, you would’ve thought of that | 早知如此 | 
| [18:16] | before you told me the stupid magic trick story. | 你何必跟我讲这破魔术师故事 | 
| [18:19] | Can’t we talk about this? | 我们谈谈吧? | 
| [18:21] | No husband of mine is gonna break his mother’s heart! | 我丈夫不许伤他母亲的心! | 
| [18:32] | Wil Wheaton! | Wil Wheaton啊! | 
| [18:34] | Wil Wheaton! | Wil Wheaton啊! | 
| [18:37] | Wait, how many was that? | 等着 我敲了几下? | 
| [18:42] | Hey, Sheldon, what’s up? | 嘿 Sheldon 咋了? | 
| [18:44] | Wouldn’t you like to know? | 你想知道吗? | 
| [18:47] | Have you been drinking? | 你喝酒了? | 
| [18:49] | Just tea. | 喝的是茶 | 
| [18:52] | The best tea I’ve ever had. | 最好喝的茶 | 
| [18:56] | Why are you here? | 你来干嘛? | 
| [18:58] | I’ll tell you. | 我来告诉你 | 
| [18:59] | I’m from Texas. | 哥是德州人 | 
| [19:02] | Need I say more? | 还用多说吗? | 
| [19:06] | Yeah, actually, a little more would be helpful. | 再说点 我估计才能理解 | 
| [19:09] | You insulted my woman. | 你侮辱我女人 | 
| [19:11] | I’m here to defend her honor. | 我来这为她正名 | 
| [19:13] | Two! It was two. | 两下! 敲了两下 | 
| [19:15] | Wil Wheaton! | Wil Wheaton啊! | 
| [19:20] | Now prepare yourself | 做好准备 | 
| [19:22] | for what may come. | 小心我打你个措手不及 | 
| [19:26] | Oh, Sheldon, do you really think we’re gonna fight? | Sheldon 你真的要打架? | 
| [19:29] | My fists are not up here | 我举起拳头 | 
| [19:31] | because I’m milking a giant invisible cow. | 不是在给看不见的大奶牛挤奶喔 | 
| [19:35] | They’re up to beat an apology out of you. | 我是举起来 打到你说抱歉的 | 
| [19:39] | Okay, I’m sorry. | 那 对不起 | 
| [19:42] | Well, that was a long bus ride for not very much. | 这么远跑过来 这么快就解决了 | 
| [19:46] | Are you okay? | 你没事吧? | 
| [19:47] | You’re asking a lot of questions, Wil Wheaton. | 你问得太多了 Wil Wheaton | 
| [19:50] | As a matter of idle curiosity, | 毫无目的地问你一句 | 
| [19:52] | Which of your shrubberies do you feel | 你觉得你家哪块灌木 | 
| [19:54] | would benefit from a thorough vomiting? | 能受得住一番呕吐? | 
| [19:57] | Never mind, I’ll choose. | 算了 我自选吧 | 
| [20:05] | You were so good in stand by me. | 多谢你支持我 | 
| [20:17] | Hello, I’m Dr. Sheldon Cooper. | 大家好 我是Sheldon Cooper博士 | 
| [20:20] | Welcome to Sheldon Cooper presents: Fun With Flags. | 欢迎收看Sheldon Cooper制作: 边玩边学旗帜 | 
| [20:25] | Get ready for a very special episode | 这一集非常特别 | 
| [20:27] | where we explore the flags | 我们将探索 | 
| [20:29] | of the popular entertainment franchise, | 著名娱乐节目 | 
| [20:31] | Star trek. | “星际迷航”的旗帜 | 
| [20:32] | And to help us, I’m pleased to introduce a special guest… | 接下来将要介绍本集协助我的… | 
| [20:35] | Surprisingly, it only took gas money | 不可思议 只要给油费 | 
| [20:37] | and the promise of free food to get him here… | 包午饭就能请来的… | 
| [20:40] | Mr. Levar Burton. | Levar Burton先生(星际迷航另一演员) | 
| [20:44] | Hey, Sheldon, it’s a pleasure to be here. | 嘿 Sheldon 很高兴能来 | 
| [20:46] | – Well, we’ve got some interesting flags for… – Cut! | – 我们有许多有趣的旗子… – 切! | 
| [20:50] | Yikes, this guy is worse than Wil Wheaton. | 亲娘 这货比Wil Wheaton还差劲 | 
| [20:57] | I don’t know what she’s talking about, | 我不明白她说啥 | 
| [20:58] | but I’m obligated to agree with her. | 但我必须要赞同 | 
| [21:00] | She’s my girlfriend. | 她是我女友 | 
| [21:01] | Ah, I hear you, brother. | 啊 我懂的 老兄 | 
| [21:04] | I still get lunch, right? | 包午饭 对吧? |