| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:11] | I hate high school parties. | 我好讨厌高中派对 |
| [00:13] | Patrick, big news. | 帕特里克 重磅消息 |
| [00:14] | Hailey’s parents are out of town and they’ve got a hot tub. | 海莉的父母出门了 他们家有热水浴池 |
| [00:16] | Don’t tell Mackenzie, though. | 不过你别告诉麦肯齐 |
| [00:17] | She just found out Hailey and Ryan hooked up | 她刚发现海莉和瑞安有一腿 |
| [00:19] | and she is a total mess. | 她整个人都不好了 |
| [00:20] | I love drinking next to fire. | 我太喜欢在火边喝酒了 |
| [00:23] | See, Ryan? I can be spontaneous. | 你看 瑞安 我也可以很自然 |
| [00:28] | Nobody look at Mackenzie, she just does it for attention. | 都别看麦肯齐 她只是为了吸引注意力 |
| [00:31] | Princess Blossom, we have to go. | 开花公主 我们得走了 |
| [00:33] | You’re late for a diplomatic function. | 外交宴会你要迟到了 |
| [00:35] | I’m a grown‐ass woman, I do what I want. | 我已经是成年人 我可以随心所欲 |
| [00:38] | And part of being grown-ass | 作为一名成年人 |
| [00:39] | is doing things you don’t want to do. | 很多时候就是不能随心所欲 |
| [00:42] | Hey, Blossom. Race you to Hailey’s? | 开花 我们比赛谁先到海莉家 |
| [00:46] | Aw, sorry, Logan. I have to, like, go be a grownup. | 抱歉 罗根 我得去当成年人了 |
| [00:49] | Psych! Eat shit, Patrick! | 心理医生 吃屎吧你 帕特里克 |
| [00:55] | All right! Yeah, babe! | 好的 太棒了 |
| [00:58] | Hey! Show us your boobies. | 给我们看看你的胸 |
| [01:01] | Okay, fine. | 好吧 |
| [01:03] | Oh no, I’m nearsighted! Bring them over here. | 不行 我近视 你得过来点 |
| [01:07] | Princess! | 公主 |
| [01:08] | Are you crazy? | 你疯了吗 |
| [01:10] | I’m crazy for attention. | 我太渴望关注了 |
| [01:15] | Make way for the bees. | 给蜜蜂让路 |
| [01:19] | First one to swerve is a little bitch. | 谁先转向谁是小狗 |
| [01:51] | God dammit! | 该死的 |
| [01:54] | Unexpected windmill?! | 意料之外的风车 |
| [02:04] | Oh, shit. | 该死的 |
| [02:05] | Are we still going to Hailey’s? | 我们还去海莉家吗 |
| [02:07] | Or what? | 不然呢 |
| [02:19] | You had one job last night: | 你昨天晚上就一个工作 |
| [02:21] | get my daughter to that boring function so I didn’t have to go. | 让我女儿去参加那个无聊宴会 这样我就不用去了 |
| [02:25] | Patrick, I hereby sentence you to being my hype man | 帕特里克 我在此宣判你要做我的捧哏 |
| [02:28] | and the guy I blame my farts on. | 还有我放屁也得你背锅 |
| [02:32] | Was that you? | 刚才是你放的屁吗 |
| [02:33] | No, that was you! | 不 是你 |
| [02:35] | And as for you‐‐ | 还有你 |
| [02:37] | Every time you go to a bonfire, you get drunk | 每次你去篝火宴会的时候 都会喝醉 |
| [02:40] | and crash a chariot into a windmill. | 然后把马车撞到风车上 |
| [02:42] | You’re acting crazy lately. | 你最近很疯狂 |
| [02:44] | Hype man? | 捧哏 |
| [02:45] | Uh, yeah. | 来了 |
| [02:46] | Crazy, y’all! | 简直疯了 |
| [02:48] | Blossom, what were you thinking? | 开花 你当时在想什么 |
| [02:51] | Oh! I don’t know, okay? I feel insane. | 我不知道 我感觉很疯狂 |
| [02:54] | Like, sometimes I can’t stop crying. | 有时候我忍不住哭 |
| [02:56] | And most of the time, I feel like I could kill someone. | 大多数时候 我感觉自己想杀人 |
| [02:58] | I see. I think I understand. | 好吧 我似乎懂了 |
| [03:01] | She’s a werewolf! | 她是狼人 |
| [03:03] | She’s a werewolf, y’all! Howlin’ at the moon. | 她是狼人 各位 在满月下嚎叫 |
| [03:08] | My daughter’s a werewolf, Patrick. Read the room. | 我女儿是个狼人 帕特里克 你有点眼力见行吗 |
| [03:11] | I’m not a werewolf! | 我不是狼人 |
| [03:14] | She’s turning. Get me a silver stake and a tarp. | 她要转化了 快给我拿银棍和绳子 |
| [03:17] | Everything hurts. | 我浑身都疼 |
| [03:19] | My stomach. My back. My boobs! | 我的胃 我的背 我的胸 |
| [03:23] | My feelings! | 我的感情 |
| [03:26] | Nobody look at me! | 谁也别看我 |
| [03:28] | I’m a monster! | 我是个怪物 |
| [03:32] | Blood! She’s killed, and she’ll kill again. | 血迹 她以前杀过人 还会再杀人的 |
| [03:36] | Everyone shut the fuck up! | 所有人都闭嘴 |
| [03:38] | She’s not a werewolf. She’s a woman. | 她不是狼人 她是女人 |
| [03:42] | My baby just got her first period. | 我的女儿来了初潮 |
| [03:45] | Right here, in front of everybody. | 就在这里 当着所有人的面 |
| [03:50] | This is the most humiliating day of my entire‐‐ | 这简直是我这辈子最羞耻的… |
| [03:54] | I just farted, everybody! | 我刚放了屁 |
| [03:56] | Oh good god, Merriman. | 天哪 梅里曼 |
| [04:02] | Holden? | 霍尔顿 |
| [04:06] | What the‐‐ | 怎么… |
| [04:13] | Patrick, during my months in the burn ward, | 帕特里克 我在烧伤病院住着的几个月 |
| [04:15] | I had a long time to think about | 我想了很久 |
| [04:17] | why you set me on fire with a big Roman candle. | 你当初为什么要拿烟火筒把我点了 |
| [04:20] | You cheated, but I cheated first. | 你做了弊 但是我先做了弊 |
| [04:23] | So I consider us square. No grudges. | 所以我们扯平了 我不恨你 |
| [04:25] | That’s very big of you. Thanks. So, are you just visiting? | 你真大度 谢谢 那你是来看我们的吗 |
| [04:28] | I’m staying, because you see… | 我要留下 因为… |
| [04:31] | I’m perfectly fine! | 我好得很 |
| [04:35] | Everyone, meet our newest squire, Holden. | 大家来认识一下新侍卫 霍尔顿 |
| [04:38] | I see he did the bandage reveal even though I asked him not to. | 他果然还是不顾我的劝阻当众揭掉绷带 |
| [04:41] | Anyway, with Barry out of commission… | 总之 巴里现在没法工作 |
| [04:45] | we had a spot to fill. | 我们有了空闲职位 |
| [04:47] | And Holden was the runner‐up in the tournament. | 霍尔顿当时是比赛里的第二名 |
| [04:50] | What is that smell? | 什么味道 |
| [04:52] | Dude, did you shit your pants? | 哥们 你是拉裤子里了吗 |
| [04:54] | No. It’s the king’s farts. | 不 是国王的屁 |
| [04:56] | Well maybe you should stop kissing his ass so hard. | 那你是不是该停止拍他马屁啊 |
| [05:11] | Hello? | 有人吗 |
| [05:12] | H‐Hello? | 有人吗 |
| [05:15] | – Hey, babe. – Keefer, baby. | -宝贝 -基弗 亲爱的 |
| [05:18] | Guess what? I got my first period. | 你猜怎么着 我来初潮了 |
| [05:20] | I love how you’re not afraid | 我好喜欢你每次都能 |
| [05:21] | to say stuff out loud that no one wants to hear. | 大声说出别人不想听的话 |
| [05:24] | I love that about me, too. | 我也很喜欢我这一点 |
| [05:26] | And the best part is, I get a super sweet period party. | 最精彩的部分在于 还会举办初潮派对 |
| [05:30] | Kiss me. | 吻我 |
| [05:34] | Is this working for you? | 你有感觉吗 |
| [05:36] | Not really. | 没什么感觉 |
| [05:37] | I mean, I can see inside your brain, and that’s cool, | 我能透视到你的大脑 虽然很酷 |
| [05:39] | but mostly it just reminds me I’ll never feel a real kiss again. | 但这只是提醒我 我再也感受不到真正的接吻了 |
| [05:44] | Aw, Keef! What else do you miss about being real? | 基弗 你还想念活着时的什么东西 |
| [05:48] | Um, I guess playing with my band. | 大概是跟乐队一起演奏吧 |
| [05:49] | The taste of my grandma’s peach cobbler. | 还有我奶奶的桃子馅饼 |
| [05:51] | Not feeling untethered in | 我不想感觉像一个 |
| [05:52] | a directionless void between heaven and hell. | 游离在天堂和地狱之间的迷茫虚空 |
| [05:54] | Taking a big‐ass whiz ranks unexpectedly high. | 撒尿居然也令我有点怀念 |
| [05:57] | Baby, it’s so tragic. We’re like a young adult novel. | 宝贝 太悲伤了 我们就像是年轻的成人小说 |
| [06:02] | It’s… It’s the beautiful princess in love with the ghost | 讲一个美丽的公主 |
| [06:05] | of a super‐hot theremin player | 爱上了超级帅的特雷门琴手幽灵 |
| [06:07] | who died onstage in a cursed iron maiden. | 他在舞台上死在了被诅咒的铁娘子刑具里 |
| [06:09] | You know I’d freak everybody out | 要是我去参加你的初潮派对 |
| [06:11] | if I went to your period party. | 我肯定会把大家吓到的 |
| [06:12] | Did someone say “Period party”? | 有人提到”初潮派对”了吗 |
| [06:18] | Aunt Donna! Piss off, you crazy egg lady. | 唐娜姑妈 走开 你个疯女人 |
| [06:21] | I haven’t had visitors in years. | 好多年没人来看过我了 |
| [06:25] | We’re not visiting you. This is our secret makeout spot now. | 我们不是来看你的 这是我们的秘密亲热地 |
| [06:29] | My grandpa locked her weird ass up here before I was even born. | 在我出生前 我爷爷就把她关在了这里 |
| [06:32] | Yes. Now it’s just me and Daniel. | 对 现在只剩我和丹尼尔 |
| [06:36] | She macraméd herself a boyfriend. | 她给自己编了一个男朋友 |
| [06:38] | He’s not my boyfriend, we’re common law married now. | 他不是我的男朋友 我们已经结婚了 |
| [06:41] | Aunt Donna, I swear to fucking god. | 唐娜姑妈 我对天发誓 |
| [06:44] | Beware the period party, girl. | 你要小心初潮派对 |
| [06:46] | At the end of the night, the maiden’s valuable virginity | 在夜晚的时候 少女珍贵的贞操 |
| [06:49] | gets locked up tight in a chastity belt. | 会用贞操带锁起来 |
| [06:52] | No way I’d put on a chastity belt. | 我才不会戴贞操带 |
| [06:55] | Princesses who refuse get locked up in towers. | 拒绝的公主就会被关起来 |
| [06:59] | If you don’t believe me, just ask me! | 如果你不信 可以问问我 |
| [07:14] | Royal farts are so much worse than regular farts. | 皇室屁比一般屁还要厉害 |
| [07:16] | I can’t scrub them off. | 我都洗不掉 |
| [07:22] | Holden! | 霍尔顿 |
| [07:22] | Hello, Patrick. Shower apple? | 你好 帕特里克 吃个苹果吗 |
| [07:25] | Whoa! Still sporting that meat collar, huh? | 你还留着这个小肉领呢 |
| [07:28] | A what? | 什么 |
| [07:28] | Your foreskin, my good man. My own is sadly departed. | 你的包皮 哥们 我的已经切除了 |
| [07:33] | The burn doctors grafted it onto a missing part of my face. | 烧伤科医生用它补了我的脸 |
| [07:37] | My eyelid. | 我的眼皮 |
| [07:38] | Turns out foreskins are incredibly versatile. | 原来包皮还有很多用处 |
| [07:41] | Again, I’m really sorry about setting you on fire. | 我再次向你道歉 不该把你点燃 |
| [07:44] | But why are we talking about my foreskin? | 不过为什么要聊包皮的事 |
| [07:47] | 梅根中士要求 强制检查包皮切除 周一早上6点 侍卫营房 | |
| [07:50] | What the‐‐ | 怎么回事… |
| [07:51] | Patrick, we’ve known about circumcision check for weeks. | 帕特里克 我们好几周前就知道有这回事了 |
| [07:54] | Guess you’ve been too busy | 看来国王的事务太忙 |
| [07:56] | with the king to pay attention to squire business. | 你已经顾不上侍卫的工作了 |
| [07:58] | But why is it mandatory? | 但为什么要强制呢 |
| [08:01] | Foreskins are a hygiene liability on the battlefield. | 包皮在战场上有卫生风险 |
| [08:04] | A case of trench dick can put you out of action for weeks. | 一旦患上战壕屌 可能几周都不能干活 |
| [08:08] | Oh, crap, this bandage isn’t supposed to get wet. | 糟了 绷带不能见水的 |
| [08:12] | Shower banana? | 吃根香蕉吗 |
| [08:19] | Mom! Am I really getting a chastity belt? | 妈 我真的要戴贞操带吗 |
| [08:21] | Ah, there is the woman of the hour. | 女主角出现了 |
| [08:23] | Who the fuck are you? | 你他妈又是谁 |
| [08:25] | I am Andrew Thomas Paulson, and I give you my magnum opus. | 我是安德鲁·托马斯·保尔森 这是我的代表作 |
| [08:30] | Behold. The Patriarch‐kini. | 请看 父权制比基尼 |
| [08:34] | Oh! It’s gorgeous. Don’t you think? | 太美了 你不觉得吗 |
| [08:36] | So it’s true? | 原来是真的 |
| [08:37] | You promised me a perfect party, not a pussy prison. | 你跟我说的是完美派对 不是给逼上锁 |
| [08:41] | It’s pinching my labia. | 夹到我的阴唇了 |
| [08:44] | Arrgh, I can’t believe Aunt Donna was right. | 没想到唐娜姑妈居然说对了 |
| [08:46] | Aunt Donna? I told you to stay out of the tower. | 唐娜姑妈 我不是让你别去塔里吗 |
| [08:49] | She’s deranged. | 她疯了 |
| [08:50] | Well maybe she’s deranged because grandpa threw her in a tower | 也许她疯是因为我爷爷把她扔进了塔里 |
| [08:54] | because she wanted control over her own disgusting body! | 就因为她想对自己的身体有掌控权 |
| [09:00] | I hide my initials in all of my masterpieces. | 我每个作品上都会留下自己的名字缩写 |
| [09:02] | Guess where I hid them on this one? | 你觉得我这次藏在了哪里 |
| [09:06] | That’s right, the anus. | 没错 就在肛门 |
| [09:10] | Keefer! | 基弗 |
| [09:12] | They’re locking up my vagina, | 他们要把我的逼锁起来 |
| [09:15] | and you’re an intangible specter | 你又是个摸不着的幽灵 |
| [09:17] | and now we can never lose our virginities to each other. | 我们现在没办法把第一次给彼此了 |
| [09:22] | Oh… right. | 好像是的 |
| [09:24] | There might still be a way | 你们要想彼此蹭蹭 |
| [09:26] | you can smash your ugly bits together. | 其实还是有办法的 |
| [09:29] | What are you talking about, you old egg witch? | 你在说什么 你个老巫婆 |
| [09:32] | I’ve heard tell of forbidden magic | 我听过禁忌魔法 |
| [09:34] | that makes spirits flesh and blood again, | 能够让灵魂重新拥有实体 |
| [09:36] | but only for a single hour. | 但只有一小时 |
| [09:39] | Keef, if you got your body back, | 基弗 如果你能复活 |
| [09:42] | then you could be my first and I could be your first. | 你就能做我的第一次 我也能做你的第一次 |
| [09:45] | Yeah, about that: when you’re on tour, | 关于这个 其实巡演的时候 |
| [09:48] | casual sex is basically on tap 24/7. | 基本是随时都在一夜情 |
| [09:52] | Shh! Shut your beautiful ghost face. | 你不许再说话了 |
| [09:54] | Aunt Donna, let’s do it. | 唐娜姑妈 来吧 |
| [09:56] | I could help if I had the spell book. | 要是魔法书在我手上我可以帮忙 |
| [09:59] | Unfortunately… | 不幸的是 |
| [10:01] | it’s in the castle library, in the banned books section. | 魔法书在城堡图书馆禁忌书籍区里 |
| [10:07] | I need two books. | 我要两本书 |
| [10:08] | Forbidden Magic Spells and Sinful Thirty Minute Meals For One‐‐ | 《禁忌魔法》和《三十分钟罪恶餐… |
| [10:12] | God dammit, Aunt Donna. | 该死的 唐娜姑妈 |
| [10:14] | I can give you the sad meal book, | 我可以把那本菜谱书给你 |
| [10:16] | but you must be 18 to check out the other one. | 但是另一本必须年满十八岁才能查阅 |
| [10:19] | But I’m the Princess. | 可我是公主 |
| [10:20] | Rules are rules. | 规矩就是规矩 |
| [10:22] | Fine. I lied. | 好吧 我撒谎了 |
| [10:23] | My name is Tiffani, I’m 29, | 我叫蒂芙尼 29岁 |
| [10:25] | and I work at the mall selling hair extensions. | 在商场卖接长假发 |
| [10:27] | I have four kids and it’s wine o’clock. Gimme the fucking book! | 我有四个孩子 现在该喝红酒了 快把书给我 |
| [10:31] | All right, Tiffani. I just need your library card. | 好吧 蒂芙尼 请出示你的图书卡 |
| [10:34] | I just need your library card. Get out of my way! | 请把图书卡给我 让开 |
| [10:41] | Princess. Are you all right? | 公主 你还好吗 |
| [10:43] | No, I’m not all right, Patrick! | 我不好 帕特里克 |
| [10:46] | My whole day’s ruined | 我的一天都毁了 |
| [10:47] | because I don’t have a frickin’ library card. | 因为我没有图书卡 |
| [10:50] | Well, I have a library card. | 我有图书卡呀 |
| [10:52] | Nerd! | 书呆子 |
| [10:54] | No, but seriously, if you could help me out, that’d be great. | 不过 你要是能帮我 那就太棒了 |
| [10:58] | Why’d you make me carry these? | 你为什么要让我来搬 |
| [11:00] | I dunno, they looked heavy. | 不知道 看起来挺沉的 |
| [11:02] | They’re really not. | 其实不沉 |
| [11:02] | Listen, my family tree is | 是这样 我的家谱里 |
| [11:04] | just cousins fucking cousins on every branch. | 所有堂兄弟姐妹基本都有一腿 |
| [11:07] | My fragile little bird bones can snap in a stiff wind, okay? | 我这身脆弱的骨头 风一吹就可能断 |
| [11:10] | And why are we in the tower? | 为什么要来塔里 |
| [11:12] | – Hey, man. – Jesus fucking Christ! | -哥们 -我勒个去 |
| [11:14] | Oh, Keefer’s a ghost now. | 基弗现在成了幽灵 |
| [11:15] | Cursed iron maiden. It happens. | 被诅咒的铁娘子刑具 难免的 |
| [11:18] | Oh man, I never had a chance to apologize for that. | 天 我一直没来得及跟你道歉 |
| [11:22] | Since you were dead. | 因为你之前都死了 |
| [11:23] | It’s cool. | 没事 |
| [11:25] | Hurry up! I gotta turn Keefer real again | 快点 我得让基弗复活 |
| [11:27] | so he can drill me hardcore before midnight. | 这样他就能在午夜之前把我狠狠地上了 |
| [11:29] | It’s basically Cinderella, except way hotter. | 跟灰姑娘剧情一样 就是更火辣一些 |
| [11:32] | Ah, Princess, you’re up in a prison tower | 公主 你带着一本魔法书 |
| [11:35] | with a spell book threatening to have sex with a ghost. | 来到了监狱塔 还要跟幽灵做爱 |
| [11:39] | I might need to tell your parents about this. | 我可能需要跟你父母说一下 |
| [11:41] | Don’t you dare. | 不许说 |
| [11:42] | You’re the one who shoved Keefer into that haunted death box. | 是你把基弗推进了那个闹鬼的刑具里 |
| [11:45] | You owe me. You owe Keef. | 你欠我的 你也欠基弗 |
| [11:47] | You‐you owe love itself! | 你欠爱情本身 |
| [11:49] | But, Princess‐‐ | 可是 公主 |
| [11:51] | I know I don’t treat you the greatest, Patrick. | 我知道我对你不算很好 帕特里克 |
| [11:53] | And I’m sorry, I am. | 我很抱歉 真的 |
| [11:55] | But this is the most important thing in the world to me. | 但是这对我来说是世上最重要的事 |
| [12:00] | Aw! All right. I’ll help. | 好吧 我帮你 |
| [12:02] | Yes! Oh, god, I’m good. | 太好了 我演技真棒 |
| [12:05] | Did you get the books? Give them to me. Give them! | 书拿到了吗 给我 快点 |
| [12:08] | Hi, I’m Patrick. Hope you like 30‐minute paella, Patrick. | 帕特里克 希望你喜欢30分钟的西班牙烩饭 |
| [12:12] | No, Aunt Donna! We’re making Keefer real. | 不 唐娜姑妈 我们要复活基弗 |
| [12:15] | Ah, yes, here we are. | 好 在这里 |
| [12:17] | “To raise the unliving for one hour’s time, | “要想让幽灵复活一小时” |
| [12:19] | “Collect these items that don’t even rhyme: | “请收集这些完全不押韵的物品” |
| [12:22] | “One baby unicorn tooth, one shedded snakeskin, | “一颗独角兽幼崽牙齿 一块碎蛇皮” |
| [12:26] | and one pickled griffin knuckle!” | “一颗腌过的神兽关节” |
| [12:28] | Well, that sounds easy enough. | 听起来不难 |
| [12:30] | But, um, hey, while we’ve got the spell book open, | 不过 既然魔法书已经打开了 |
| [12:33] | is there anything in there about, uh, magic circumcisions? | 有没有什么办法能够做魔法包皮切除 |
| [12:39] | Freak! | 变态 |
| [12:40] | Hmm, the more I think about it, | 其实我仔细一想 |
| [12:42] | this spell makes the unliving live, | 这个咒语能让幽灵复活 |
| [12:44] | but can also reverse the process, | 但是也可以反着来 |
| [12:46] | making living things shrivel up and die. | 让活着的东西萎缩死亡 |
| [12:48] | Like, say, your cock‐top. | 比如你的包皮 |
| [12:51] | That’s it. That’s what I need. | 没错 我就想要这个 |
| [12:52] | Princess, we can kill two birds with one stone. | 公主 我们可以一石二鸟 |
| [12:54] | Great, great, great, but all this blah‐blah | 很好 不过你们在这里废话 |
| [12:56] | isn’t getting my clam jammed, | 对我来说一点用都没有 |
| [12:57] | so let’s fuckin’ move it! | 赶紧动起来 |
| [13:01] | Remind me what this shopping trip is for again. | 这次买东西是要干什么来着 |
| [13:03] | So you, a legal adult, can help a teenage girl have sex? | 你一个成年人要帮一个小女孩做爱吗 |
| [13:05] | No, Broth, it’s not about that. | 不 布洛斯 不是这样的 |
| [13:07] | I killed her boyfriend. I feel terrible. | 我杀了她男朋友 我感觉很内疚 |
| [13:09] | I just want to make it up to her any way I can. | 我只是想找个方式弥补她 |
| [13:12] | I’ve got the unicorn tooth, I’ve got the griffin knuckle. | 独角兽牙拿到了 神兽关节也拿到了 |
| [13:15] | I just need a snakeskin. | 就差蛇皮了 |
| [13:16] | They keep those behind the counter. | 那些都放在柜台后面的 |
| [13:19] | Ugghhh, this is always the worst. | 我最讨厌这样了 |
| [13:22] | Hi, I need, uh… | 我想要… |
| [13:25] | …a, uh, snakeskin. | 蛇皮 |
| [13:27] | A what? | 什么 |
| [13:29] | a snake… skin. | 蛇皮 |
| [13:36] | – I don’t see any. – What? Can you check in the back? | -这里没有 -什么 能看看后面吗 |
| [13:40] | Hold on. Shelly! | 等等 雪莉 |
| [13:42] | What? | 怎么 |
| [13:42] | This young boy needs a snakeskin! | 有个年轻人要蛇皮 |
| [13:45] | Skim milk is in aisle three! | 脱脂牛奶在三号货架 |
| [13:48] | No, skin! | 不 是皮 |
| [13:50] | From a snake! | 蛇皮 |
| [13:52] | Oh my god. | 我的天哪 |
| [13:56] | Oh, Keef. | 基弗 |
| [13:57] | Soon I’m gonna be in your arms again for a whole hour, baby. | 很快我就能在你怀里待一小时了 宝贝 |
| [14:01] | Can I carve out 10 minutes of that hour for the dessert table? | 我能不能抽十分钟去吃个甜点呢 |
| [14:06] | I guess. | 可以吧 |
| [14:07] | Spirits, hear our desperate call, | 魂灵 请听我们召唤 |
| [14:10] | soon our loved one shall stand tall, | 将我们挚爱的逝者返还 |
| [14:13] | tooth of beast and snakeskin grey, bring to life my… | 野兽之牙 灰色蛇皮 请复活我的… |
| [14:20] | macramé! | 羊毛毡 |
| [14:21] | Macramé?! | 羊毛毡 |
| [14:28] | He lives! He lives! | 他活了 他活了 |
| [14:32] | God dammit, Aunt Donna! | 该死的 唐娜姑妈 |
| [14:34] | You double‐crossing bitch! | 你这个两面三刀的婊子 |
| [14:45] | A little on the nose, don’t you think? | 是不是有点太直接了 |
| [14:54] | Hmm, you know what? I don’t hate it. | 算了 还挺好的 |
| [14:57] | It’s over! | 结束了 |
| [15:00] | I can’t believe that Aunt Donna | 我对唐娜姑妈那么好 |
| [15:02] | did that to me after I was so nice to her. | 她居然这样对我 |
| [15:04] | What the hell? | 为什么这样啊 |
| [15:07] | I’m sorry about your dick thing, | 关于你屌的事情我表示遗憾 |
| [15:09] | which I do not understand or want to know more details about. | 我不理解 也不想知道更多细节 |
| [15:12] | Just don’t give up hope. | 你别放弃希望 |
| [15:13] | I’ll go get more ingredients. We can try again. | 我再去买材料 可以再试试 |
| [15:15] | That’s a good idea. | 好主意 |
| [15:17] | Otherwise it’s like you killed Keefer twice. | 不然感觉你杀了基弗两次 |
| [15:22] | Oh, let me guess, you need another snakeskin? | 我猜猜 你又想要蛇皮 |
| [15:24] | Yes! | 对 |
| [15:26] | Hang on. | 等等 |
| [15:27] | – Shelly! – What? | -雪莉 -干什么 |
| [15:29] | Kid out here needs another snakeskin! | 这个人想再买一块蛇皮 |
| [15:38] | We’re all out! | 卖完了 |
| [15:40] | Yeah, we’re all out. | 我们卖完了 |
| [15:41] | Yeah, I heard. | 我听到了 |
| [15:48] | Okay. We’ve got one Bloody Mary, | 这里是一杯血腥玛丽 |
| [15:51] | one Crimson Tide, and one Period Colada. | 红潮风暴 还有椰林飘血 |
| [15:56] | Delectable. | 很美味 |
| [16:02] | This is pretty extravagant for a late bleeder. | 初潮来这么晚 至于这么夸张吗 |
| [16:06] | I heard she faked it. | 听说是她装的 |
| [16:10] | Give me the stuff. My belt goes on in 10 minutes. | 把东西给我 十分钟后我就要戴上了 |
| [16:13] | Princess. I failed. I’m really sorry. | 公主 我失败了 对不起 |
| [16:28] | The hardest thing about a masterpiece | 对于杰作最难过的事情就是 |
| [16:31] | is knowing when to walk away. | 知道它们终将离去 |
| [16:34] | Oh, come on, Princess, it’s… | 别这样 公主 |
| [16:36] | it’s not the end of the world. | 这不是世界末日 |
| [16:38] | Oh, I know. | 我知道 |
| [16:39] | But look at him up there, Patrick. | 可是你看看他 帕特里克 |
| [16:43] | He’s doesn’t just love me. | 他不只是爱我 |
| [16:45] | He’s the only person here who actually likes me. | 他是这里唯一喜欢我的人 |
| [16:48] | He’s my only friend. | 我只有他一个朋友 |
| [16:50] | That’s not true. You have Ivy, Fern, Human Shield. | 不是的 你还有艾薇 费妮 人肉盾牌 |
| [16:53] | They’re staff. They don’t like me. | 她们只是员工 并不喜欢我 |
| [16:56] | Last summer they rented a beach house together and I wasn’t invited. | 去年夏天她们租了一个海滩房 都没叫我 |
| [16:59] | They didn’t think I’d find out, but I did. | 她们以为我不知道 但我发现了 |
| [17:01] | I’m your friend. | 我是你的朋友 |
| [17:02] | Only because my parents make you. | 你是被我父母逼的 |
| [17:07] | It’s only him. And we can’t even have one dance. | 只有他 可我们甚至不能共舞 |
| [17:11] | ‘Cause after tonight I get locked up | 因为今天晚上之后我就会被关起来 |
| [17:13] | until I lose my virginity to some fourth cousin | 直到某一天我跟一个四表兄上床 |
| [17:15] | with a tooth growing out of his fuckin’ forehead. | 他的额头上还长着一颗牙 |
| [17:20] | Okay. It’s not over yet. | 现在还没结束 |
| [17:22] | All you need is the dead skin off something long and cylindrical. | 我们只需要一个圆柱形长条动物的死皮 |
| [17:25] | Maybe they’re serving grilled snake at the buffet. | 也许宴会上会有炸蛇 |
| [17:27] | Or sausages. Come on, Patrick! | 或者香肠 帕特里克 快想想 |
| [17:29] | Who wants cham‐PAN‐ya? | 谁想来点香槟 |
| [17:41] | No. It can’t work. Can it? | 应该不行吧 能行吗 |
| [17:45] | Turns out foreskins are incredibly versatile… | 原来包皮还有很多用处 |
| [17:49] | It’s the skin of a snake, kinda. | 也算是”蛇”皮吧 |
| [17:52] | Let’s pop this top. | 再来一瓶 |
| [17:56] | You might wanna step back. | 你先让一下 |
| [17:58] | This could get messy. | 场面也许会很血腥 |
| [18:18] | What did you do? | 你干了什么 |
| [18:21] | Blossom… use this snakeskin. | 开花 用这个蛇皮 |
| [18:26] | You did that for me? | 你是为我这样做的吗 |
| [18:28] | I was wrong. I have more than one friend here‐‐ | 我想错了 我不止有一个朋友 |
| [18:31] | Oh, you’re unconscious. | 好吧 你晕过去了 |
| [18:38] | – Fucking ew. – Do you remember the spell? | -好恶心 -你还记得咒语吗 |
| [18:40] | Spirits, hear our desperate call, | 魂灵 请听我们召唤 |
| [18:43] | soon our loved one shall stand tall, | 将我们挚爱的逝者返还 |
| [18:46] | tooth of beast, snakeskin grey, sorta, | 野兽之牙 灰色蛇皮 差不多 |
| [18:50] | bring to life my… | 请复活我的 |
| [18:52] | ghostly bae? | 幽灵宝贝 |
| [18:58] | Ow! Ow‐ow‐ow! This hurts like a bitch! | 好痛啊 |
| [19:00] | This hurts like a fucking bitch! | 真的太疼了 |
| [19:03] | And there. | 搞定 |
| [19:05] | Those bandages will keep the leeches from crawling away. | 这些绷带应该能封住那些水蛭 |
| [19:13] | Payback’s a bitch, Pattycake. | 报应来了吧 小帕特 |
| [19:15] | I made the whole thing up. There was never a circumcision check. | 整件事都是我编的 没人要检查包皮切除 |
| [19:19] | Much like shrimp, revenge is a dish best served room temperature. | 跟虾一样 复仇在室温的时候感觉最美妙 |
| [19:28] | Wow. You’re even more beautiful than I remember. | 你比我记忆里还要好看 |
| [19:34] | There’s no woman in the world I’d rather be real with. | 我只愿在你一人面前复活 |
| [19:41] | This is so much hotter when I can’t see the inside of your skull. | 看不到你的大脑之后 性感了许多 |
| [19:45] | Oh, Keef. Intercourse me! | 基弗 快跟我做爱 |
| [19:51] | Lock her up! Lock her up! | 锁起来 锁起来 |
| [19:54] | Lock her up! Lock her up! | 锁起来 锁起来 |
| [19:57] | Lock her up! Lock her up! | 锁起来 锁起来 |
| [20:00] | Lock her up… | 锁起来 |
| [20:01] | Forget about them, babe. | 别管他们 宝贝 |
| [20:02] | Lock that bitch up! | 把那个贱人锁起来 |
| [20:04] | This isn’t how I wanted it to happen. | 我不希望是这样的 |
| [20:06] | Not on a bird shit‐covered balcony, over a thousand assholes. | 我不想在落满鸟屎的阳台 下面是一群混蛋 |
| [20:10] | I wanted it to happen on a beach in the crashing surf, | 我希望是在海浪冲刷下的海滩上 |
| [20:13] | with, like, all of my ladies‐in‐waiting watching, | 让我的侍女们在旁边看着 |
| [20:15] | looking jealous as hell. | 嫉妒到不行 |
| [20:17] | One day, we’ll find a way to make that happen. | 总有一天 我们会实现的 |
| [20:20] | But maybe not for a while, | 但是短期内可能不行 |
| [20:22] | because growing all of my bones and skin back | 因为重新长回骨头和皮肤的过程 |
| [20:24] | was way worse than dying the first time. | 比第一次死的时候还难受 |
| [20:27] | I’m sorry I put you through all this, Keef. | 抱歉我让你经历了这些 基弗 |
| [20:29] | Are you kidding? | 开什么玩笑 |
| [20:30] | Not only do I get an hour of life, I get to spend it with you. | 我不只能复活一小时 还能有你作伴 |
| [20:36] | So let’s go party, Princess. | 我们去派对吧 公主 |
| [20:42] | I hereby declare my daughter’s sexuality under control! | 我在此宣布我女儿的性欲已被控制 |
| [21:03] | Look at me, bitches! | 快看我 贱人们 |
| [21:08] | Oooh, that’s nice. | 真好 |
| [21:21] | I’m very proud of you. | 我真为你骄傲 |
| [21:23] | Today you were everything a princess should be: | 今天你是个合格的公主 |
| [21:25] | beautiful and 100% obedient. | 美丽 以及绝对的顺从 |
| [21:30] | How am I supposed to sleep in this fucking thing? | 我戴着这个怎么睡觉 |
| [21:32] | Here’s the spare key. | 把备用钥匙给你 |
| [21:34] | The what? | 什么 |
| [21:35] | My mother gave me one, and her mother before her. | 我妈给了我一把 她妈妈也给了她 |
| [21:38] | The men think they’re in control, but we have all the power. | 男人认为他们掌权 但权力在我们手上 |
| [21:45] | Thanks, Mom. | 谢了 妈妈 |
| [21:50] | Also, it’s impossible to shit with that thing on. | 而且 戴着那玩意没法拉屎 |
| [21:54] | And today’s lunch meat will be… | 今天的午餐荤菜是 |
| [21:57] | loaf. | 面包 |
| [21:59] | And one more thing. | 还有一件事 |
| [22:00] | Thanks to everyone’s hilarious prank on Patrick… | 多亏大家对帕特里克做的恶作剧 |
| [22:05] | …and Patrick’s unfathomable gullibility, | 以及他本人深不可测的天真无知 |
| [22:09] | it’s come to my attention that most of you are uncircumcised. | 我注意到你们大部分人都没切除包皮 |
| [22:13] | Not me. You’ve all seen it. | 我不是 你们都看过了 |
| [22:15] | You’re all a case of trench dick waitin’ to happen. | 你们都有患上战壕屌的风险 |
| [22:17] | Therefore, next week: mandatory circumcisions! | 因此 下周要强制切除 |
| [22:21] | My penis! | 我的屌 |
| [22:22] | I understand the prank was Holden’s idea. | 听说恶作剧是霍尔顿的主意 |
| [22:24] | You may thank him. | 你们可以感谢他 |
| [22:26] | Aw, shit. | 完了 |
| [22:35] | I’m gonna go hose off. | 我去洗洗 |
| [22:37] | Finish this for me, baby. | 你帮我抽完吧 宝贝 |