| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | The plugs in your arms and head are gone. | 你手臂和头部的插管都已经取下了 |
| [00:09] | Morpheus? | 墨菲斯? |
| [00:11] | Your appearance now | 你现在的状态 |
| [00:12] | is what we call residual self image. | 我们称之为残存自我影像 |
| [00:14] | It’s a mental projection of your digital self. | 这不过是你在虚拟世界的投影 |
| [00:18] | This isn’t real? | 这不是真实的吗 |
| [00:20] | What is real? How do you define real? | 什么是真实? 你如何定义真实? |
| [00:23] | Real is simply electrical signals | 真实不过是你的大脑 |
| [00:25] | interpreted by your brain. | 给你传递的电波信号 |
| [00:26] | This is the world that you know, | 这就是你所知的世界 |
| [00:28] | the world as it was at the end of the 20th Century. | 也就是二十世纪末的世界 |
| [00:32] | It exists now only as a neural interactive simulation | 现在只是一个有精神互动的虚拟世界 |
| [00:35] | that we call the Matrix. | 我们称之为母体 |
| [00:37] | You’ve been living in a dream world, Neo. | 你一直活在梦中的世界 尼奥 |
| [00:39] | This is the world as it exists today. | 这才是真正存在的世界 |
| [00:44] | That’s not what Y2K’s gonna be. | 千年虫不会变成这样的 |
| [00:46] | You don’t know that. | 你又不知道 |
| [00:47] | No one knows what’s going to happen. | 没人知道会发生什么 |
| [00:48] | Well, I’m not gonna lose my hair, that’s for sure. | 我反正是不会变秃的 绝对不会 |
| [00:50] | You think the world could end? | 你难不成觉得那会是世界末日吗 |
| [00:52] | Yes. The Millennium Bug is coming! | 没错 千年虫就要来了! |
| [00:54] | It’s the bug of the century. | 这可是世纪之虫啊 |
| [00:55] | I caught a big bug with my bra today. | 我今天倒是用我的胸罩抓到了个大虫子 |
| [00:58] | – More like a 36 Double Dead. – Ma! | – 真是36码胸夹而死啊 – 妈! |
| [01:02] | Guys, this is the first day | 大家 这也许是我们生命里 |
| [01:03] | of maybe our last summer of our lives. | 最后一个夏天的第一天了 |
| [01:05] | We’ve gotta do it all… Ice cream trucks, sunburns, | 我们应该尽情玩乐… 冰淇淋车 艳阳暴晒 |
| [01:07] | water slides, skinny dipping, | 水上滑梯 自由裸泳 |
| [01:09] | ice cream trucks. | 冰淇淋车 |
| [01:11] | – Who’s with me? – I am. | – 谁和我一起 – 我 |
| [01:13] | Mom? | 妈? |
| [01:14] | For the next three months | 接下来的三个月里 |
| [01:15] | while I’m busy studying for grad school, | 在我忙着为研究生院的事学习的时候 |
| [01:17] | you will be by my side PSAT prepping. | 你也得在旁边跟着准备奖学金资格考试 |
| [01:20] | Study buddies. | 学习兄弟 |
| [01:28] | No! | 不! |
| [02:08] | This sucks. | 我太惨了 |
| [02:09] | All my friends are going on cool vacations | 我所有的朋友们都开开心心度假去了 |
| [02:11] | and I’m stuck studying. | 我却被困在这学习 |
| [02:12] | Sounds like you’re going on a ton of trips… | 听起来你已经在旅行路上了 |
| [02:13] | on the Complain Train. | 坐的抱怨连连列车 |
| [02:15] | I don’t need all this college prep. | 我不需要为了上大学做这么多准备 |
| [02:17] | Eddie, this is not just your future at stake | 埃迪 这不仅关乎到你的前程好坏 |
| [02:20] | but my reputation. | 还关系到我的声名 |
| [02:21] | How am I gonna become a respected school principal | 如果我都不能让自己的儿子上重点大学 |
| [02:24] | if I can’t even get my own son into a top college? | 我怎么成为一个受人尊敬的校长? |
| [02:26] | Whoa, top college? | 哇哦 重点大学? |
| [02:27] | I was thinking more like Tier 2, Tier 3. | 我顶多想的二本三本 |
| [02:29] | I want less pressure, more fun. | 我需要更少的压力和更多的快乐 |
| [02:32] | Sit around and relax. | 闲坐着放松就行 |
| [02:33] | Rejuvenate from the stress of high school. | 好从高中学习的压力中解脱出来 |
| [02:35] | You get out every day at 1:45. | 你每天一点四十五就放学了 |
| [02:36] | I know, and my first class starts at 9:00. | 我知道 我第一堂课可是九点开始上呢 |
| [02:39] | Eddie, what did you do to the tub? | 埃迪 你对浴缸做了什么 |
| [02:41] | Oh, that’s Gia, my mega water balloon. | 噢 那是吉亚 我的超大水球 |
| [02:47] | I’m leaving Gia in the tub | 我会把吉亚一直留在浴缸里 |
| [02:49] | until I bulk up enough to be able to throw her. | 直到我壮到可以扔的动她 |
| [02:51] | She big. | 她可大了 |
| [02:52] | “She big,” Louis. | “她可大了” 路易斯 |
| [02:54] | No water balloons. Real world is coming. | 别说啥水球了 这是真实世界 |
| [02:56] | College. You need to grow up. | 上大学才要紧 你懂事点行不行 |
| [02:58] | You’ve been saying that since I was 3. | 从我三岁起你就在说这话了 |
| [03:00] | College. I’m so jealous of you. | 大学啊 我可太羡慕你了 |
| [03:02] | Best time of your life. | 那是你人生中最美好的时光啊 |
| [03:03] | You know, I was a bit of a campus legend myself. | 要知道 我那会也能称得上是学院的一个传奇呢 |
| [03:06] | Please don’t start. | 请你闭嘴 |
| [03:07] | They called me “The Buffalo.” | 他们管我叫”公牛” |
| [03:10] | Why’d they call you “The Buffalo”? | 为什么他们管你叫”公牛” |
| [03:11] | Because you couldn’t find a hotter wingman. | 因为你找不到比我更棒的僚机了 |
| [03:13] | Hey, what about Maryland? | 嘿 去马里兰怎么样 |
| [03:15] | Go to your old man… And old woman’s alma… mata? | 去你老爸… 还有老妈上过的阿尔玛… 玛塔大学? |
| [03:17] | Almamatta. Alma mamata? | 是阿尔玛玛塔还是阿尔玛玛玛塔来着? |
| [03:20] | Alma… Go to our college? | 阿尔玛… 去我们上过的大学 |
| [03:22] | No. Maryland did not make the list. | 不行 马里兰州不在列表考虑上 |
| [03:26] | Do I get a say in any of this? | 我能在这事儿上说句话吗? |
| [03:28] | Oh, Eddie, if only the PSATs | 噢埃迪 除非奖学金资格考试 |
| [03:30] | were verbal, math, and comedy. | 考的是语文 数学和幽默感 |
| [03:34] | Don’t you think this is a little much? | 你不觉得你有点过火了吗 |
| [03:35] | You don’t want to burn Eddie out on college | 你总不想在埃迪还没进大学之前 |
| [03:37] | before he even gets in. | 就被你烧得灰都不剩吧 |
| [03:38] | We have to stay on him or he strays. | 如果我们不看紧了他 他就要走错路了 |
| [03:41] | He proves this over and over again. | 他以前就老犯这种错误 |
| [03:43] | If I recall, you weren’t exactly | 如果我没记错 你以前也不是 |
| [03:45] | the most focused student in college. | 大学里最专心学习的学生啊 |
| [03:47] | We do not talk about my college days, remember? | 我们说好不提我大学的事儿的 记得吗? |
| [03:51] | Especially not in front of our impressionable son | 尤其是不能在我们这个毫无判断力的儿子面前 |
| [03:55] | who has been talking about going to school | 他之前不还老想着去什么 |
| [03:57] | in “One of the Arizonas.” | “亚利桑那州随便哪间”都行 |
| [03:59] | Just saying, you made some questionable choices and… | 但是话说回来 你不也做过很多令人疑惑的选择 还… |
| [04:01] | That was different! | 我的情况不一样! |
| [04:03] | It’s way more competitive now. | 现在竞争比那会激烈多了 |
| [04:05] | My sister, Connie, started prepping Justin a year out, | 我姐姐康妮一年前就开始让贾斯汀作准备了 |
| [04:08] | and he got into a crap school. | 结果他还是进了个垃圾学校 |
| [04:09] | He’s a freshman at UCLA. That’s a great school. | 他是加州大学洛杉矶分校的吧 那学校不错啊 |
| [04:12] | Ugh, you sound just like Connie. | 噢 你这话和康妮说的一模一样 |
| [04:14] | I want better for Eddie, | 我想让埃迪过得更好 |
| [04:15] | not just so I can rub it in Connie’s face, | 不仅是因为我可以狠狠打康妮的脸 |
| [04:17] | but because I want him to have the best possible future, | 更是因为我想让他的前途更加光明 |
| [04:20] | which I could also rub in Connie’s face. | 同时我还能狠狠打康妮的脸 |
| [04:22] | Well, it might help Eddie get more excited | 呃 如果想让埃迪对这事儿更上心 |
| [04:24] | if he knew there was more to it than just academics. | 不如让他知道一些除了师资学术之类的其他事情 |
| [04:27] | It’s about making connections, | 要让他有实感 |
| [04:28] | socializing, living on your own… | 关于社交啊 自己独立生活啊… |
| [04:30] | The whole experience. | 大学生活会带来的那些体验 |
| [04:32] | Trust me, there is no experience | 相信我 没有什么体验 |
| [04:34] | like the feeling Eddie will get | 比得上当埃迪 |
| [04:36] | when he graduates Harvard | 从哈佛大学毕业时 |
| [04:38] | and sees my glowing stare of approval. | 看见我闪亮的 满是赞许的目光那一刻的感受 |
| [04:44] | Whoa! | 哇哦! |
| [04:46] | Do I look cool now? | 我看起来是不是酷毙了 |
| [04:48] | Mr. Ice. | 冰山先生 |
| [04:50] | Yeah, just breeze on through. | 是啊 真是冻结全场呢 |
| [04:52] | Emery, join us. | 埃默里 坐下来一起啊 |
| [04:53] | We’re watching Arnold Schwarzenegger’s “Twins.” | 我们正在看阿诺·施瓦辛格主演的”龙兄鼠弟” |
| [04:55] | It’s Danny DeVito’s “Twins.” | 是丹尼·德维托主演的”龙兄鼠弟” |
| [04:57] | Perfect timing. Easy on the eyes. | 你来的正好 正是赏心悦目的时候 |
| [05:00] | There’s rumors of Arnold entering politics, | 有传闻说阿诺进入政坛了 |
| [05:02] | so I’ve become a big fan. | 所以我就成了一枚大粉丝 |
| [05:03] | How can you sit and watch TV with this Y2K thing coming? | 都知道千年虫危机要来的事情了 你还能坐得下来看电视? |
| [05:06] | We’re totally unprepared. | 我们一点准备也没有 |
| [05:08] | We need to start stocking up on supplies, rations, | 我们得开始囤日常用品 食物补给 |
| [05:10] | valuables we can use to trade with other survivors. | 还有可以和其他幸存者们做交易的有价值的东西 |
| [05:13] | That’s gonna require some cash. | 那得要不少现金呢 |
| [05:15] | Exactly. | 废话 |
| [05:16] | We need to get summer jobs. | 我们得做些暑期兼职 |
| [05:17] | Mm. Act responsible while everyone else gets crazy. | 嗯哼 在其他人都不知所措的时候出来主持大局 |
| [05:21] | Or live it up. | 或者干脆尽情狂欢 |
| [05:22] | We won’t be around to face the consequences. | 后事如何我们都不用管 |
| [05:25] | Y2k! | 千年虫! |
| [05:37] | Something just clicked, | 只听咔嗒一声 |
| [05:38] | and I fell on board with sunglasses. | 我带着太阳镜就摔倒在甲板上了 |
| [05:40] | I’m just jealous you actually got to go somewhere this summer. | 我可真是太羡慕嫉妒恨你这暑假能去个什么地方玩了 |
| [05:43] | Not somewhere, Eddie. Ball State. | 不只是什么地方 埃迪 是鲍尔州立大学 |
| [05:45] | Damn. | 可以啊 |
| [05:46] | You were on a college campus? Fun! | 你去大学学院玩了? 有意思 |
| [05:48] | Oh, yeah. We piled into the Suburban, | 噢是的 我们一股脑挤进了雪佛兰里 |
| [05:50] | popped in some Reba, | 顺道探访了一些小路 |
| [05:51] | and Burger King’d our way straight to my sister’s dorm. | 而且汉堡王就在通往我姐姐宿舍的路上 |
| [05:54] | Ah. | 这样啊 |
| [05:54] | Eddie, that’s it. | 埃迪 我有主意了 |
| [05:56] | We’ll take a family trip to college. | 我们全家一起去大学旅行一次吧 |
| [05:58] | That’d be sick! | 太棒了! |
| [05:59] | Until Mom makes me take PSATs the whole time. | 除非妈妈能不让我每天都在学习PSAT的话 |
| [06:02] | I think you’ll be surprised. | 当你妈妈走在校园里的时候 |
| [06:03] | Once your mom’s on campus, | 我觉得你会感到惊喜的 |
| [06:05] | you may see a different side of her. | 你可能会看到她的另一面 |
| [06:06] | There’s no chance we’re even getting there. | 我们根本不可能去那的 |
| [06:08] | Mom always says sleep is our vacation. | 妈妈总说睡觉就是我们的假期 |
| [06:10] | Trust me, I know her weak spot. | 相信我 我知道她的弱点 |
| [06:12] | Connie. | 康妮 |
| [06:13] | I know my weak spot… Toe massages. | 我也知道我的弱点… 脚趾按摩 |
| [06:18] | Family trip to California! | 加州家庭之旅! |
| [06:19] | Oh, that’s great. Whose family? | 不错哦 哪个家庭? |
| [06:21] | Us. Us family. | 咱们 咱们家 |
| [06:22] | Dad’s taking us to visit Justin at UCLA. | 爸爸要带我们去加州大学洛杉矶分校看贾斯汀 |
| [06:24] | He’s in summer classes. | 他在上暑校 |
| [06:26] | We can’t. We just got new jobs. | 我们去不了 我们才刚找到新工作 |
| [06:27] | Use your vacation and sick days. | 请年假和病假呗 |
| [06:29] | They’ll understand. I’m a boss. | 他们会理解的 我可是当老板的 |
| [06:31] | Dad just Y2K’d our jobs. | 爸爸刚把我们的工作千年虫掉了 |
| [06:33] | Louis, we’re saving for college, | 路易斯 我们要攒上大学的钱 |
| [06:35] | not wasting money to go visit one | 而不应该浪费钱 |
| [06:37] | on the other side of the country. | 跑到国家的另一边去参观学校 |
| [06:38] | My brother flies for Delta. He’ll get us free tickets. | 我弟弟在达美航空工作 他能给咱们搞到免费机票 |
| [06:40] | We can stay with Justin… No hotel. | 我们可以和贾斯汀住一起… 不用住酒店 |
| [06:42] | And the best part? | 你知道最精彩的是什么? |
| [06:43] | If Eddie turns down UCLA for Harvard, | 如果埃迪拒绝了加州大学洛杉矶分校而去了哈佛 |
| [06:46] | you can rub it in Connie’s face. | 你就可以啪啪打康妮的脸 |
| [06:52] | Okay! Pack your bags, boys. | 好! 收拾好行李 孩子们 |
| [06:54] | We’re going to college! | 咱们去参观大学! |
| [07:02] | Does your roommate have any diseases, Justin? | 你室友有什么疾病吗 贾斯汀? |
| [07:06] | Ugh. Never mind. | 哎 算了 |
| [07:07] | I assumed when you called | 我猜你打电话的时候说的 |
| [07:08] | it would be just Eddie staying with me. | 意思是只有埃迪来和我一起住 |
| [07:10] | Well, that’s why you’re in college… | 这就是你为什么要来读大学… |
| [07:11] | To learn things you didn’t know. | 就是来学你不知道的事的 |
| [07:13] | Hey, how come there’s no sock on the door? | 嘿 为什么门上没有袜子? |
| [07:14] | Kidding. | 开玩笑 |
| [07:15] | Amazing bookstore. | 书店超赞的 |
| [07:17] | Oh, Marley, nice. | 马利 不错哎 |
| [07:18] | No woman, no cry… mon. | 没有女人 就没有眼泪 |
| [07:21] | Oh, sweet. I had one of these. | 哦不错 这个我也有一个 |
| [07:22] | Mine was red. If it could talk, whoo. | 我的是红的 它要是会说话 那可太棒了 |
| [07:24] | Louis, calm down. Where’s Grandma and the boys? | 路易斯 冷静 奶奶和孩子们呢? |
| [07:27] | She said she needed the campus ATM | 她说去观光之前 |
| [07:29] | before they went sightseeing. | 要取点钱 |
| [07:30] | They’re here, too? | 他们也都在这? |
| [07:33] | Great. | 真好 |
| [07:34] | Fill out the form and you’ll get a credit card | 把这个表填了你就能拿到信用卡 |
| [07:35] | and a free T-shirt. | 和一件免费T恤 |
| [07:37] | Grandma, we don’t have jobs to pay these off, remember? | 奶奶 我们没有工作还不了信用卡的钱 你记得吧? |
| [07:39] | So? | 所以呢? |
| [07:47] | Y2k. | 就像千年虫那样 |
| [07:49] | She’s right, Emery. | 她说得对 埃默里 |
| [07:50] | We tried to do the responsible thing, and it didn’t matter. | 我们尽力做负责任的事情 但这并不重要。 |
| [07:53] | Let’s just live it up while we can. | 咱们就借此机会好好享受吧 |
| [07:55] | Y2k. | 千年虫 |
| [07:57] | We’re rich! | 我们是大富翁! |
| [07:58] | Y2k! Y2k! Y2k! | 千年虫! |
| [08:02] | Wow. Your own fridge. Cool. | 你有自己的冰箱 太酷了 |
| [08:04] | We didn’t have those in my day. | 我们上学那会没有这些 |
| [08:06] | You just had to let stuff spoil. | 你就只能让东西烂掉 |
| [08:10] | There she is. It’s all coming back. | 这就是她 她回归了 |
| [08:13] | Whoa. What’d you just do? | 你刚才干了什么? |
| [08:14] | Nothing. | 什么都没干 |
| [08:15] | Just trying to clean up this hellhole. | 就是想清理一下这个鬼地方 |
| [08:17] | So, uh, J-bird, the Huangs are at college! | 贾小子 黄家全员就位了! |
| [08:20] | What’s the plan? | 你有什么安排? |
| [08:21] | I have a midterm today | 我今天期中考试 |
| [08:22] | and I was gonna use the morning to study. | 所以我早上要学习 |
| [08:25] | Please. | 拜托 |
| [08:26] | How hard can the tests be at Eddie’s safety school? | 埃迪保底学校的考试能有多难? |
| [08:28] | Ucla? | 加州大学洛杉矶分校? |
| [08:30] | I got a 4.0, good SAT, | 我有4.0的绩点 不错的SAT分数 |
| [08:32] | and a rare sit-down with the Dean of Admissions | 和与招生办主任的一次难得面谈 |
| [08:34] | and I still got wait-listed. | 就这样我还被放到备选名单了 |
| [08:35] | It’s not easy to get into. | 这所学校并不好进 |
| [08:37] | Oh. Quick, hide the Sambuca. | 快把茴香酒藏起来 |
| [08:39] | It’s the RA. | 宿管来了 |
| [08:40] | This is Kip, my roommate. | 这是基普 我室友 |
| [08:42] | This is my family. They’re staying with us. | 这是我家人 他们来和我们一起住 |
| [08:45] | Doesn’t matter to me. | 不关我事 |
| [08:47] | My midterms just posted. I flunked out. | 我期中考试成绩出来了 我挂掉了 |
| [08:49] | AP classes, years of prep school, | 先修课程 几年的预科 |
| [08:51] | valedictorian… | 致告别辞的学生代表… |
| [08:52] | just to be back in my dad’s butcher shop, | 到最后还不是得回我爸的肉店 |
| [08:54] | cutting ham for Mrs. Josephs. | 给约瑟夫太太切火腿 |
| [08:56] | Wait a minute. | 等会儿 |
| [08:58] | So UCLA isn’t a school for dum-dums like you? | 所以加州大学洛杉矶分校并不是你这种蠢材来的地方? |
| [09:01] | It’s the Harvard of California. | 这简直是加州的哈佛啊 |
| [09:04] | Okay, new itinerary… | 新行程确定了… |
| [09:06] | Campus tour, three class lectures, | 校园参观 三节课程讲座 |
| [09:08] | and a meeting with the Dean of Admissions. | 还有和招生办主任的面谈 |
| [09:10] | Jessica, I thought a meeting with the Dean | 杰西卡 我觉得不可能有机会 |
| [09:11] | was impossible to get. | 和招生办主任会面的 |
| [09:12] | I reached out to your RV salesman. | 我联系了你的房车销售员 |
| [09:13] | He put in a call. | 他打了个电话 |
| [09:14] | Kareem Abdul-Jabbar? | 卡里姆·阿卜杜·贾巴尔? |
| [09:16] | Yeah. Apparently he’s some kind of a big deal around here. | 对 显然他在这里是个大人物 |
| [09:19] | Did he sell RVs in college? | 他还在学校里卖房车么? |
| [09:21] | It’s industrious. | 够勤奋的 |
| [09:22] | Dad, you said Mom would be different once we got here, | 爸 你不是说来这以后妈妈会不一样么 |
| [09:24] | but College Mom is even worse. | 可我感觉校园妈妈更恶劣呢 |
| [09:32] | So, do you want to get a picture with a “Celebrity”? | 你想和”名人”合影么? |
| [09:35] | Marilyn Monroe? Rocky? | 玛丽莲·梦露? 洛奇? |
| [09:37] | That guy with a spot-on Whoopi Goldberg? | 那个长得和乌比·戈德堡一模一样的? |
| [09:39] | I don’t know, we’ve spent a lot. | 我不知道 咱花了好多钱了 |
| [09:41] | Grandma, what’s going on? | 奶奶 这是怎么回事? |
| [09:43] | Me and Danny are going to take the limo | 我和丹尼要去坐豪华轿车 |
| [09:46] | and do some adult things. | 然后做一些成年人的事 |
| [09:48] | Uh, Grandma, that’s not Danny DeVito. | 奶奶 这不是丹尼·德维托 |
| [09:49] | Show them, Danny. Do the Batman. | 给他们看看 丹尼 学个蝙蝠侠 |
| [09:55] | So, you’re just gonna ditch us | 所以你就这么 |
| [09:56] | in the middle of Los Angeles? | 把我俩抛弃在洛杉矶街头? |
| [09:58] | Oh, Y2K! | 千年虫嘛! |
| [09:59] | Every man for themselves. | 个人为己 |
| [10:02] | Again, Penguin! | 再来学个企鹅! |
| [10:05] | Have fun. | 玩得开心 |
| [10:07] | Do you ever worry for Grandma’s safety? | 你曾担心过奶奶的安全吗? |
| [10:09] | I worry for that guy’s safety. | 我担心那个男的的安全 |
| [10:15] | Uh, excuse me, ma’am. | 不好意思 女士 |
| [10:16] | Uhp, looks like Jessica’s “Bruin” Up another question. | 看来杰西卡又有”熊”问题了 |
| [10:20] | Because it’s the UCLA Bruins. | 因为这是UCLA的熊 |
| [10:22] | Man, this girl is on a pun run like I’ve never seen. | 天啊 这女孩这样的双关语我还从没见过 |
| [10:25] | It’s effortless. | 简直是天生的 |
| [10:26] | Can you tell us what the library hours are? | 你能告诉我们图书馆的开放时间吗? |
| [10:28] | I can, but the librarians have asked me to keep it hush-hush. | 我能 但是图书管理员要我保密 |
| [10:32] | Oh, you can’t teach this. | 这可真学不来 |
| [10:34] | A pimps and hoes party? | 皮条客和妓女的聚会? |
| [10:35] | – Yes and yes. – Ooh, sounds fun. | – 除了想去还是想去 – 听起来挺好玩 |
| [10:37] | Eddie, pay attention. | 埃迪 集中注意力 |
| [10:39] | You need to remember every detail about the school | 你需要记住这所学校的每一个细节 |
| [10:41] | so you can impress the Dean of Admissions later. | 这样你待会才能给招生办主任留下印象 |
| [10:47] | Hey, uh, I know you mean well, | 我知道你是好意 |
| [10:48] | but maybe you can ease up on Eddie. | 但你或许可以对埃迪宽容一点 |
| [10:49] | Ease up? I’m trying to get our son focused on college. | 宽容? 我就是想让我们的儿子专心上大学 |
| [10:52] | Well, you don’t get a donkey to a cornfield by whipping him. | 你不可能把一头驴鞭打进玉米地 |
| [10:55] | You show him the corn… | 你得给它看看玉米… |
| [10:56] | “Hey donkey, look at all this tasty corn!” | “嘿 小毛驴 看看这些美味的玉米” |
| [10:58] | Donkeys don’t eat corn. Well, something does. | 毛驴不吃玉米吧 好吧 有些驴吃 |
| [11:00] | I think you mean a pig. A pig’ll eat anything. | 我觉得你指的是猪 猪啥都吃 |
| [11:02] | I know about pigs. | 我了解猪 |
| [11:03] | The point is this is supposed to be fun for Eddie. | 问题是这本该是让埃迪开心的 |
| [11:06] | College is not supposed to be fun, okay? | 大学不是为了寻开心的 好吗? |
| [11:08] | Oh, is that so? | 是这样吗? |
| [11:10] | Um, excuse me, uh, Pun Master, | 打扰一下 双关大师 |
| [11:12] | have you ever had a student get in trouble | 你们有学生因为在咖啡厅裸奔 |
| [11:14] | for streaking in the cafeteria | 而不是复习经济学考试 |
| [11:16] | instead of studying for her econ final? | 惹上麻烦吗? |
| [11:18] | – Louis, don’t do this. – Follow-up question. | – 路易斯 闭嘴 – 接着的问题 |
| [11:20] | You guys ever hear of a Messy Jessie? | 你们有谁听说过浪女杰西吗? |
| [11:22] | Get ready for this, Eddie. | 准备听好 埃迪 |
| [11:25] | Drink. | 喝 |
| [11:29] | Drink. Tough one, Sarah. | 走个狠的 莎拉 |
| [11:31] | Man, I love Tuesdays. | 天呐 我爱星期二 |
| [11:34] | What should we do with this kayak that I “Borrowed”? | 我们该用我”借来”的这个划艇干什么呢? |
| [11:36] | And another time, | 还有一次 |
| [11:37] | she got her hands on a huge tub of industrial glue… | 她的手沾上了巨大一块工业胶水 |
| [11:41] | Okay, Louis, that’s enough. | 好了 路易斯 不要再说了 |
| [11:42] | And now her son knows that his mom was fun. | 现在她的儿子知道她妈妈以前很有趣了 |
| [11:45] | Pretty cool, right, Eddie? | 太酷了 是吧 埃迪? |
| [11:48] | Uh… Eddie? | 埃迪呢? |
| [11:49] | Where’d he go? | 他去哪了? |
| [11:55] | After this, | 在这之后 |
| [11:56] | I wanna see a TV taping with a live studio audience. | 我想去电视录制现场当观众 |
| [11:58] | – What? I’m not doing that. – Why not? | – 什么? 我可不要 – 为什么不 |
| [12:01] | Because our time is finite, and I don’t wanna waste it | 因为我们的时间有限 我可不想浪费在 |
| [12:04] | watching garbage with a bunch of zoo people. | 和一群人看垃圾节目 |
| [12:06] | I’m thinking of becoming an actor. | 我想成为一名演员 |
| [12:07] | You and everyone else. | 好多人都这么想 |
| [12:09] | No, I wanna go to Muscle Beach, | 不 我想去肌肉海滩 |
| [12:11] | see where Arnold began his political career. | 看看施瓦辛格开始政治生涯的地方 |
| [12:14] | – What’s the point of that? – What’s the point in anything? | – 那有什么意义? – 什么有意义? |
| [12:16] | Y2K’s coming. | 千年虫就要来了 |
| [12:17] | Oh, poor baby. | 可怜的娃 |
| [12:19] | Grandma got DeVito, so you want some Arnold. | 外婆有了德维托 所以你想要施瓦辛格 |
| [12:21] | Better actor than you’ll ever be. | 他们可都比你演得要好 |
| [12:24] | Maybe you’re right. | 也许你是对的 |
| [12:25] | The world’s ending. | 世界末日要到了 |
| [12:26] | Why care about anything? Or anyone. | 何必在乎任何事或任何人呢 |
| [12:28] | I’m out of here. | 我要走了 |
| [12:30] | – What? – Y2K! | – 什么? – 千年虫! |
| [12:31] | Y2k! | 千年虫! |
| [12:37] | If Eddie misses this meeting and winds up at a Tier 3 school, | 如果埃迪错过了这场面试然后最后就上了三本 |
| [12:39] | – it’s all your fault. – My fault? | – 那都是你的错 – 我的错? |
| [12:41] | You corrupted him with all my old escapades, | 你用我的陈年往事腐蚀了他 |
| [12:43] | which I never wanted him to hear. | 我可不想让他知道那些事 |
| [12:46] | He took it as free license | 他会拿那些事当做挡箭牌 |
| [12:47] | to ditch us and run wild. | 嘲讽我们然后肆意妄为 |
| [12:50] | Exactly what I feared. | 那正是我害怕的事 |
| [12:51] | Or I inspired him to explore this campus | 或者我激励他探索这个校园 |
| [12:53] | and all it has to offer. | 挖掘学校里的一切 |
| [12:55] | – Hey, what’s up? – And still show up right on time. | – 嘿 怎么了? – 还是准时来了 |
| [12:57] | Eddie, I’m sorry you had to listen to those nonsense stories | 埃迪 我很抱歉你听到那些你爸跟参观小组 |
| [13:01] | your dad told the tour group. | 胡编乱造的故事 |
| [13:02] | Stories? What stories? | 故事? 什么故事? |
| [13:03] | The ones about your mother? | 关于你妈妈的故事? |
| [13:05] | Nah, I must’ve bailed before that. | 不 我肯定在那之前就溜了 |
| [13:07] | And yet he still made it to his big meeting. | 但他还是来了这次面试 |
| [13:10] | Because Eddie knows that college is important | 因为埃迪知道大学很重要 |
| [13:12] | and he must take it seriously. | 他必须严肃看待 |
| [13:14] | Yeah, I was thinking about that, | 是的 我在考虑这件事 |
| [13:16] | and I don’t wanna go to college. | 我不想上大学 |
| [13:18] | College sucks. | 大学太糟糕了 |
| [13:20] | And this must be Eddie. | 这位一定是埃迪了 |
| [13:24] | – “College sucks”?! – Eddie! | – 大学很糟糕? – 埃迪! |
| [13:26] | Sorry. Not just this one. All colleges. | 抱歉 我不只是指这家大学 是所有大学 |
| [13:30] | As Dean of Admissions, I am disappointed. | 作为招生办主任 我很失望 |
| [13:34] | But as a man who thinks he may have left the oven on… | 但是作为一个人看到他忘了关烤箱 |
| [13:38] | I’m thrilled. | 我有点害怕 |
| [13:39] | Seems like a nice guy. | 看起来是个好人 |
| [13:41] | You had Kareem’s recommendation. | 你有卡瑞姆的瑞推荐信 |
| [13:42] | His sky hook of approval! | 录取信的金钥匙! |
| [13:44] | All you had to do was come in and smile. | 你需要做的就是进来然后微笑 |
| [13:48] | I can’t smell anything. | 我啥都闻不到 |
| [13:49] | I’m so angry, I’ve lost my ability to smell. | 我太生气了 我啥都闻不到 |
| [13:54] | You guys should be thanking me. | 你们应该感谢我 |
| [13:55] | Now you don’t have to waste your money | 你们不用浪费钱了 |
| [13:57] | sending me somewhere I hate. | 把我送到我讨厌的地方 |
| [13:59] | Nothing. It’s like all my powers | 什么都没有 好像我所有的力量 |
| [14:01] | have been drained to fuel my rage. | 都在为我的暴怒充能 |
| [14:03] | – Where have you been? – That tour was so boring. | – 你去哪了? – 那个参观太无聊了 |
| [14:05] | I had to find something else to do. | 我得找点别的事干 |
| [14:06] | You went to that party. | 你去了那个派对? |
| [14:07] | That’s how this all happened. | 所以才变成了这样 |
| [14:09] | He went there, he got drunk, | 他去了那 喝醉了 |
| [14:11] | he lost his potential, and now he hates college. | 失去了他的潜力 现在他讨厌大学 |
| [14:13] | No, I went and found Justin. He’s my age. | 不 我去找贾斯汀了 他和我一样大 |
| [14:15] | I figured he might show me how to have fun around here. | 我觉得他应该能带我看看有意思的地方 |
| [14:20] | Another “Mr. Show”? | 再看一集《韩国猛男秀》? |
| [14:22] | Seriously? | 认真的吗? |
| [14:23] | We’ve been watching TV for hours. | 我们已经看了几小时电视了 |
| [14:25] | Isn’t there anything else you guys do? | 你们就不干别的吗? |
| [14:27] | We can all take a nap again. | 我们可以再打个盹 |
| [14:31] | I thought that’s what you wanted. | 我以为你就想干这个 |
| [14:33] | Nice and easy, sit around. | 轻松愉快 到处坐坐 |
| [14:35] | Recharge from high school. | 从高中生活中解脱 |
| [14:36] | Yeah, it sounded good in theory, | 是的 那听起来不错 |
| [14:38] | but that’s all they do here. | 但他们就只做这些 |
| [14:40] | Turns out I need a little more. | 结果我发现我需要更多 |
| [14:41] | I haven’t seen one thing here that doesn’t suck. | 我在这里没看到什么不糟糕的 |
| [14:44] | I’m sorry. College isn’t for me. | 对不起 大学不适合我 |
| [14:46] | It’s lame. | 太无趣了 |
| [14:49] | This is a disaster. | 这是一场灾难 |
| [14:51] | He went from Tier 3 schools to no schools at all. | 他从上三本到根本不想上学了 |
| [14:54] | He’s going backwards. | 他还倒退了 |
| [14:55] | Well, it’s now or never. | 好吧 此时不做更待何时 |
| [14:56] | If you’re not going to show our son | 如果你不给儿子看看 |
| [14:57] | how to have a good time here, then I will. | 怎么在这过的有趣 那就我来 |
| [14:59] | You? | 你? |
| [15:00] | What are you gonna do, | 你要做什么 |
| [15:01] | throw a Frisbee with him on the quad? | 和他在院子里扔飞盘? |
| [15:03] | You don’t throw a Frisbee, you slang it. | 不是扔飞盘 是飞飞盘 |
| [15:05] | Louis, who are we kidding? | 路易斯 我们在笑话谁呢 |
| [15:08] | I let you play it up in front of the kids, | 我可以让你在一群孩子面前玩飞盘 |
| [15:10] | but we both know that in college, | 但我们都知道大学的时候 |
| [15:12] | you were a dork. | 你就是个书呆子 |
| [15:13] | Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s why Eddie needs you. | 是的 是的 所以埃迪需要你 |
| [15:15] | He is you. | 他就是你 |
| [15:16] | No, Evan’s me. | 不 埃文才是我 |
| [15:18] | Responsible, focused, able to pull off argyle. | 负责 认真 能拉出菱形花纹 |
| [15:21] | Argyle! | 菱形花纹! |
| [15:21] | Evan is you now. | 埃文是现在的你 |
| [15:23] | Eddie is who you used to be. | 埃迪是你以前的样子 |
| [15:24] | I could handle myself. | 我能管好自己 |
| [15:26] | I knew where to draw the line. | 我知道底线在哪 |
| [15:28] | – Eddie’s not me. – No, he’s not. | – 埃迪可不是我 – 不他不是 |
| [15:29] | He’s way better off because you raised him. | 他比你强多了因为你养大了他 |
| [15:32] | Mistakes, regret, loss, | 犯错 后悔 失败 |
| [15:34] | this is the place to start to learn about that stuff. | 这里就是学习那些的地方 |
| [15:36] | And it’ll only help our kids to know | 而且它会帮助我们的儿子知道 |
| [15:37] | that we went through it, too. | 我们也经历过这些 |
| [15:39] | And we survived and evolved. | 我们都挺过来了 并且我们变得更好了 |
| [15:40] | Same way he will. | 他也会 |
| [15:43] | Look, Jessica, someone needs to show Eddie | 听着 杰西卡 总要有个人要让埃迪知道 |
| [15:45] | that college can be challenging | 大学是有挑战的 |
| [15:47] | and soul-searching and fun. | 是寻找自我的 并且很有趣 |
| [15:48] | And that person is you. | 那个人就是你 |
| [15:50] | The old you. | 以前的你 |
| [15:52] | Messy Jessie. | 浪女杰西 |
| [15:53] | What do you say, gunslinger? | 你怎么说呢 神枪手？ |
| [15:57] | … probably a huge tadpole by now. | … 也许现在已经是一只巨大的蝌蚪了 |
| [15:59] | Nice, right? | 很棒的 对吧？ |
| [16:06] | Arnold got his start here. | 阿诺德就是从这里开始的 |
| [16:08] | What are your political aspirations? | 你的政治抱负是什么呢？ |
| [16:11] | Which exercise | 哪项运动 |
| [16:12] | best preps a young candidate | 最能为年轻竞选候选人的竞选巡游路线 |
| [16:13] | for the campaign trail? | 做好准备呢？ |
| [16:15] | How do you square the Electoral College | 你是如何看待总统选举 |
| [16:17] | with “1 Person, 1 Vote”? | 一人一票的制度的? |
| [16:24] | Alright, I know you heard this scene 15 times or so. | 好吧 我知道这一场你们已经看了十五次左右了 |
| [16:27] | But they’re gonna run it once more, | 但他们得再录一次 |
| [16:29] | so they need you to act like | 所以他们需要你们表现得像 |
| [16:31] | this is the first time you’re hearing these jokes! | 这是你们第一次听到这些笑话一样! |
| [16:34] | All right? Energy up. | 好吗? 调整好状态 |
| [16:36] | Oh, this is nothing. | 这都不算什么 |
| [16:38] | When Kelsey Grammer’s having a day, look out. | 当凯尔希·格兰莫心情不好的时候 就要当心了 |
| [16:42] | You sure you can eat ramen dry? | 你确定可以干吃方便面? |
| [16:44] | You can eat anything dry if you chew enough. | 只要你拼命嚼 你什么干的都能吃 |
| [16:50] | Eddie, I have to tell you something. | 埃迪 我必须要跟你说件事 |
| [16:52] | I am Messy Jessie. | 我是浪女杰西 |
| [16:54] | Who? | 谁? |
| [16:55] | When I was in college, | 当我读大学的时候 |
| [16:57] | I didn’t take it seriously. | 我没有好好读书 |
| [16:59] | I used to be a madwoman. | 我曾经是一个疯女人 |
| [17:01] | – I don’t believe this. – What? | – 我不相信 – 不相信什么？ |
| [17:04] | That you could fill a water balloon | 不相信你用剃须膏 |
| [17:06] | with shaving cream instead of water | 而不是用水来填充水球 |
| [17:07] | so you could actually lift it? | 这样你就可以把它举起来？ |
| [17:08] | No, I mean, yes, that is also pretty mind-blowing, | 不 我是说 是的 这件事也非常让人大开眼界 |
| [17:10] | but I’m talking about how you were wild in college. | 但我想说的是你在大学时期有多疯狂这件事 |
| [17:13] | Occasionally, I would let my hair down. | 偶尔 我会放下我的头发 |
| [17:15] | Until I shaved it all off on a dare. | 直到我把头发全部剃掉 |
| [17:17] | How come you never told me all this? | 你怎么从没告诉我这事？ |
| [17:19] | Because there are some qualities you see in your kids | 因为你在孩子身上看到了 |
| [17:21] | that you know they got from you, and you are not proud. | 一些你知道他们从你身上得到的品质 而你并不骄傲 |
| [17:25] | So… | 所以… |
| [17:26] | you’re ashamed I like to have fun? | 你羞于我喜欢玩？ |
| [17:28] | No, it’s not that. | 不 不是这个 |
| [17:30] | It’s just that maybe | 只是有可能 |
| [17:31] | if I had been more focused the first time around, | 如果我在第一次更加专注的话 |
| [17:34] | I wouldn’t be back in school now | 我现在就不会回学校 |
| [17:35] | trying to do it all over again. | 尝试着再次深造学习 |
| [17:36] | I don’t want you to have to do that. | 我不希望你需要这样重回学校 |
| [17:38] | Really? | 真的吗？ |
| [17:38] | Because it seems to me that the way you did it | 因为在我看来 你这样做的方式 |
| [17:40] | is way more interesting. | 更有趣 |
| [17:41] | You lived it up, you had a family, | 你过着你想要的生活 有了家庭 |
| [17:44] | multiple careers, still pushing yourself… | 有多种职业 仍在努力 |
| [17:46] | Okay, you’re right, I don’t regret it. | 好吧 你说得对 我不后悔 |
| [17:48] | I just don’t want to encourage you | 我只是不想鼓励你 |
| [17:50] | to behave the way I did. | 像我那样做 |
| [17:51] | I know, I’m a hypocrite. | 我知道我是个伪君子 |
| [17:52] | No, cocky. | 不 你是骄傲自大了 |
| [17:54] | You think you’re the only person who could handle anything? | 你认为你是唯一可以处理任何事情的人？. |
| [17:56] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [17:57] | Because I am battle-tested. | 因为我经受了挑战的考验 |
| [17:58] | Not as much as me. | 没有我多 |
| [17:59] | You could never handle what I went through… you. | 你永远无法承受我所经历的一切 那就是你 |
| [18:04] | Me versus me. | 我对抗我 |
| [18:05] | That is interesting. Who would win? | 有意思 谁会赢呢? |
| [18:08] | Me. | 肯定是我啊 |
| [18:09] | You’re crazy. | 你太疯狂了 |
| [18:11] | You call it like you see it. | 你很坦诚 |
| [18:12] | That is another quality I am proud you get from me. | 这是我引以为豪的你从我身上得到的另一种品质 |
| [18:16] | Well, I am glad that Messy Jessie could help. | 好吧 我很高兴浪女西能帮上忙 |
| [18:19] | Now, are you gonna tell me | 现在 你准备告诉我 |
| [18:20] | what we’re gonna do with this cream balloon? | 我们要把这个充满剃须膏的气球怎么办吗？ |
| [18:23] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [18:23] | As long as you promise to only do it at Harvard. | 只要你答应只在哈佛这么做 |
| [18:27] | I don’t know about Harvard, | 我不清楚哈佛会怎么样 |
| [18:29] | but maybe college isn’t as lame as I thought. | 但是应该没我想象中的这么糟 |
| [18:32] | Okay. Stanford. | 好吧 斯坦福 |
| [18:33] | Ready? | 准备好了吗？ |
| [18:35] | Hey, look! | 嘿 快看！ |
| [18:36] | It’s our little movie star! | 是我们的小电影明星！ |
| [18:38] | You make it big? | 你有获得成功吗？ |
| [18:40] | No. Hollywood sucks. | 没有 好莱坞糟透了 |
| [18:41] | Yeah, turns out a beachside gym | 是啊 原来海滨健身房 |
| [18:44] | isn’t the political think tank you would expect. | 不是你所期望的政治智囊团 |
| [18:46] | And look at this. | 看看这个 |
| [18:48] | Completely pumped out. | 肌肉完全肿胀了 |
| [18:50] | I won’t be able to do bis and tris till next week! | 我这一周都不能吃蛋白质补品了! |
| [18:52] | I thought being rich | 我原以为变得富有 |
| [18:53] | and not caring about anything would be amazing. | 并且不在乎任何事情会很棒 |
| [18:55] | Garfield makes it look so easy. | 加菲猫让它看起来很简单 |
| [18:57] | Garfield’s not rich. | 加菲猫并不富有 |
| [18:59] | He’s cat-rich. It’s different. | 他是猫类的有钱 这两者是不一样的 |
| [19:01] | It was all too much. | 一切都太过分了 |
| [19:02] | The excess, ignoring consequences, | 过度 忽视后果 |
| [19:05] | never saying no. | 从不说不 |
| [19:06] | It’s unsustainable. You can’t live life that way. | 这是不可持续的 你不能这样生活 |
| [19:08] | No one can. Not even me. | 没有人能 连我也不能 |
| [19:10] | Not even Danny DeVito. | 连丹尼·德维托也不能 |
| [19:12] | Grandma, that wasn’t Danny DeVito. | 奶奶 那不是丹尼·德维托 |
| [19:14] | Emery, they could’ve kissed. Let her have it. | 埃默里 他俩可能亲吻过了 让她享受吧 |
| [19:18] | You know, even if Y2K’s coming, | 你知道 即使千年虫来了 |
| [19:20] | I’d rather spend my last few days with you two, | 我也愿意和你们俩度过我的最后几天 |
| [19:22] | just like we always do… | 就像我们常做的那样 |
| [19:23] | On the couch, busting each other’s yams. | 在沙发上 捣碎对方的地瓜泥 |
| [19:27] | Hey, if the world doesn’t end, | 嘿 如果世界末日没来 |
| [19:29] | how are we gonna pay off our credit cards? | 我们要怎么还清信用卡呢？ |
| [19:32] | I faked my death before. | 我以前假装死亡过 |
| [19:34] | I can do it again. | 我可以再假死一次 |
| [19:40] | Look out below! | 下面的人注意咯! |
| [19:43] | Nooooooo! | 不要! |
| [19:47] | Messy Jessie! | 浪女杰西! |
| [19:49] | She big, and she back! | 她长大了 而且她回来了! |
| [19:53] | If you were this crazy in college, | 如果以前你在大学这么疯狂的话 |
| [19:54] | I can’t imagine what “The Buffalo” Was like. | 我无法想象”公牛”是什么样子 |
| [19:56] | Nope. Sorry. That’s R-rated. | 不行 抱歉 那是限制级的 |
| [19:58] | Louis, I thought you said | 路易斯 我以为你说过 |
| [19:59] | good parenting was sharing our past, not hiding it. | 好的家长会分享自己的过去 而不是掩藏起来 |
| [20:02] | Oh, I say a lot of things to get out of the doghouse. | 我说了很多话来摆脱困境 |
| [20:04] | Your dad was a club guy. | 你爸爸是个俱乐部的人 |
| [20:06] | He joined them all. | 他加入了所有俱乐部 |
| [20:09] | I am so excited. | 我太兴奋了 |
| [20:10] | Topiary Club! | 植园俱乐部！ |
| [20:11] | Or should we call it Shrub Club? | 或许我们应该叫它灌木俱乐部? |
| [20:15] | Look out, nerds! | 小心 书呆子们! |
| [20:16] | Coming through! | 要冲过来了! |
| [20:19] | Are you here for the club? | 你是来俱乐部的吗? |
| [20:21] | Extracurriculars are the wings | 课外活动 |
| [20:23] | of a social butterfly. | 是社交蝴蝶的翅膀 |
| [20:24] | Dad, you’re making it worse. | 爸爸 你越描越黑了 |
| [20:25] | Oh, yeah? I had a ton of sex. | 哦 是吗? 我有很多性生活 |
| [20:27] | – No, you did not. – I did, too. | – 不你没有 – 我有 |
| [20:28] | With who? The bush club? | 和谁? 和草木俱乐部? |
| [20:30] | The Shrub Club! | 是灌木俱乐部! |
| [20:31] | Okay. That’s enough sharing. | 可以了 说这么多就够了 |