时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:06] | [Grace Potter’s “Stuck In The Middle” playing] | NETFLIX 原创剧集 |
[00:12] | ♪ Well, I don’t know Why I came here tonight ♪ | |
[00:16] | ♪ Got the feelin’ That somethin’ ain’t right ♪ | |
[00:20] | ♪ I’m so scared In case I fall off my chair ♪ | |
[00:24] | ♪ And I’m wondering How I’ll get down the stairs ♪ | |
[00:28] | ♪ And there’s clowns to the left of me Jokers to the right ♪ | |
[00:32] | ♪ Here I am Stuck in the middle with you ♪ | |
[00:35] | ♪ Yes, I’m stuck in the middle with you ♪ | |
[00:39] | ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ | |
[00:52] | Frankie, I thought you were gonna get up early to get a head start. | 弗兰基 我还以为你会早起 早点开始呢 |
[00:55] | On my world-famous banana potpie. | 我在忙着做我的 世界著名香蕉大麻馅饼 |
[00:58] | It has real bananas in it, | 它里面有真正的香蕉 |
[00:59] | and real pot. | 和真正的大麻 |
[01:01] | In what world is that famous? | 哪门子著名了? |
[01:03] | A world of monkeys and stoners. And Sol. | 一个有猴子 有瘾君子 还有索尔的地方 |
[01:06] | We can’t go see him empty-handed. Hand me the Mountain Dew. | 我们不能空着手去看他 你把山露汽水递给我 |
[01:09] | You know, with all due respect, | 恕我直言 |
[01:11] | I’ve seen Sol pre-surgery, during his surgery, and post-surgery. | 索尔术前、术中、术后我都去看过 |
[01:16] | And this is post-post-surgery, and I am not-not going. | 这次都术后的术后了 我是绝对不会去看的 |
[01:19] | So… you are going? | 这么说… 你会去看他? |
[01:22] | No. Not until we figure out this PR nightmare. | 不去!除非我们解决这场公关噩梦 |
[01:26] | We are not gonna achieve statehood for Puerto Rico in one day. | 我们不可能在一天之内 把波多黎各变成美国的一个州 |
[01:30] | We have to roll up our sleeves and solve this toilet problem, | 我们必须卷起袖子 解决这个马桶问题 |
[01:34] | ’cause my husband is coming back today, and I actually would like to see him. | 因为我丈夫今天回来 我其实也想见见他 |
[01:38] | Oh, but today is for Sol. | 但今天安排见索尔 |
[01:40] | I’ve got big surprises planned for him, | 我给他准备了大惊喜 |
[01:43] | including the pièce de résistance. | 包括一件佳品 |
[01:46] | “Pièce de résistance”? Oh, you’ve been watching Ratatouille again. | 佳品? 你又在看《美食总动员》? |
[01:50] | Jack is bringing Sol a tambourine signed by the Mamas and one Papa. | 杰克要送索尔一个 由爸爸妈妈乐队签名的手鼓 |
[01:55] | Why didn’t somebody bring me a tambourine when I had my knee replaced? | 我换膝盖的时候 怎么没人送我一个手鼓? |
[01:59] | I gave you one. | 我送了你一个 |
[02:01] | But all you used it for was to let me know when you were out of vodka. | 但你只用它来告诉我 你的伏特加喝完了 |
[02:04] | Oh, right. But still, it wasn’t signed by a celebrity. | 对 但它不是名人签名的手鼓 因为那是在我认识杰克前呀 |
[02:07] | Because that was before I knew Jack. | |
[02:10] | He knows everybody. All the crème de la crème. | 他谁都认识 所有的大咖 |
[02:13] | Oh, you did watch Ratatouille again. [chuckles] | 你确实又看了《美食总动员》 |
[02:16] | Oui. Jack’s le bombe. | |
[02:18] | Every Friday, he drives up to LA | 每个周五他都会开车去洛杉矶 |
[02:21] | just to have lunch with Neil Diamond and Henry Winkler. | 只为了和尼尔戴蒙德 还有亨利温克勒吃个午饭 |
[02:25] | That’s it. Frankie! | 对呀! 弗兰基! |
[02:28] | -This could save our toilet. -What could? | 这样可以拯救我们的马桶 怎么拯救? |
[02:31] | We could… We could get a celebrity to endorse it. | 我们可以找个名人为它背书 |
[02:34] | -Imagine if we got Fonzie to sit on it. -I’m not asking Jack. | 想象一下如果我们找方西来坐镇 我不会找杰克开口的 |
[02:39] | Our relationship is too new. | 我们认识的时间太短 |
[02:41] | Well, it wasn’t too new for you to ask him to bring a gift to Sol. | 你让他给索尔带个礼物 就不嫌你们认识时间短了 |
[02:44] | Sol doesn’t have a prostate. | 索尔的前列腺没了! |
[02:46] | Well, I don’t have one either! | 我也没有啊! |
[02:48] | Grace, I really like this guy. | 格蕾丝 我真的喜欢这个人 |
[02:52] | And one of the things he likes about me is that I don’t care about his connections. | 他喜欢我身上的一点是 我不在乎他的人脉关系 |
[02:57] | Well, do you care about Rise Up? | 他会在乎“升起”吗? |
[02:58] | Are you kidding? Thanks to Rise Up, the band is touring again. | 你开玩笑吧? 多亏了升起 乐队又在巡演了 |
[03:03] | Therefore, this band member is going with you. | 所以这个乐队成员也和你一起去 |
[03:06] | Sorry, but now it’s a solo gig. This way, you can’t bother Jack. | 抱歉 现在成个人演唱会了 这样你就不能麻烦杰克了 |
[03:10] | Oh, I won’t, I promise. | 我不会的 我保证 |
[03:14] | Unless, of course, Jack knows Elton John, | 当然了 除非杰克认识埃尔顿约翰 |
[03:17] | but then we might have to rename it the Elton John. | 到时我们就得给马桶 重命名为“埃尔顿”马桶了 |
[03:22] | [Grace chuckles] | |
[03:25] | Your favorite nurse is here. | 你最喜欢的护士来了 |
[03:28] | I don’t know. | 我可不确定 |
[03:30] | Elena at the hospital was truly special. | 医院的埃莉诺真的很特别 |
[03:32] | Well, where is she now, in your real time of need? | 你真正需要她的时候她在哪里? |
[03:36] | At her daughter’s quinceañera. | 在她女儿的成人礼派对上 |
[03:39] | By the way, we gave her a hundred bucks and three “get well” balloons. | 对了 我们给了她100美元 和三个早日康复气球 |
[03:45] | Oh. | |
[03:46] | I bet this ostrich is up to no good. | 我敢打赌这只鸵鸟不怀好意 笑到疼的时候 搞笑视频就不搞笑了 |
[03:49] | -[squawks] -[laughs] | |
[03:51] | [whimpers] | |
[03:53] | Oh. Funny videos aren’t funny when it hurts to laugh. | |
[03:58] | Then why are you watching funny videos? | 那你为什么还要看搞笑视频? |
[03:59] | [sniffs] | |
[04:01] | Marge posted it, | 玛吉上传的 她上传的视频都是经典 |
[04:02] | and Marge only posts gold. | |
[04:05] | Why don’t you watch an old movie or something? | 你干嘛不看一部老电影什么的? |
[04:07] | I tried watching Grumpy Old Men, but it reminded me of us. | 我试着看《斗气老顽童》 却让我想到了我们 |
[04:11] | Except for the part where we were both interested in Ann-Margret. | 除了我们以前都对安玛格丽特感兴趣 |
[04:14] | Sol, what you need is a nice quiet day at home for healing. | 索尔 你需要的是在家安静休息 好好疗伤 |
[04:17] | And I promise you dull and boring. | 我向你保证 肯定会枯燥乏味 |
[04:20] | That’s why I married you. | 所以我才跟你结婚 |
[04:21] | [knocking] | |
[04:24] | Surprise! | 惊喜! |
[04:26] | Oh, dear God. | 天啊 |
[04:28] | You know, I’ve thought a lot about it, and I know it means a lot to you. | 我好好考虑过了… 我知道这事对你意义重大 |
[04:32] | So… | 所以… |
[04:34] | you should be the guardian to Erin and Liz’s kid. | 你应该做艾琳和莉兹的孩子的监护人 |
[04:37] | You mean it? | 你说真的吗? |
[04:39] | Sign the papers. | 签署法律文件 |
[04:41] | You’re not messing around with me | 那次你说 你戳坏了我的毛毛楚巴卡运动衫 你不会像那次一样耍我吧? 我不知道是谁剪的 但我发誓不是我 |
[04:42] | like the time you said you dug my furry Chewbacca sweatshirt? | |
[04:44] | I don’t know who shaved it, but I swear it wasn’t me. | |
[04:49] | Thank you so much. | 太谢谢了 |
[04:53] | I’m gonna call Erin and Liz. | 我去给艾琳和莉兹打个电话 |
[04:56] | Send them my love. | 请捎去我爱的问候 你知道自己刚才用了“爱”这个词吧? |
[04:58] | Um, you know you just used the word “love,” right? | |
[05:02] | I use it sometimes. | 我有时候会用 |
[05:04] | Like when I’m doing something for Barry, whom I’m fond of. | 比如我为巴里做事的时候… 我喜欢他 |
[05:09] | Yeah, he’s… okay. | 对 他… 好吧 但你听起来 一反常态地宽宏大量 |
[05:12] | But you sounded uncharacteristically magnanimous. | |
[05:16] | That’s because I was characteristically devious. | 那是因为我一贯阴险 |
[05:19] | Ooh. | |
[05:20] | Now that I’ve said yes to Barry being their baby’s guardian, I can milk it. | 既然我同意了巴里 做她们孩子的监护人 我可以趁机骗点好处 |
[05:24] | He owes me for, like… | 他欠我的… |
[05:27] | [exhales] | |
[05:28] | …ever. | 永远欠我 |
[05:29] | Yeah, but aren’t you on the hook for this kid if something happens? | 对 但如果出什么事 你不为这个孩子负责吗? |
[05:33] | Mm-mm, mm-mm. | |
[05:35] | Here’s the genius, nothing can happen. | 妙就妙在什么事都不会出 |
[05:37] | The odds of two women in their 30s dying before their kid turns 18 | 两个三十多岁的女人在她们的孩子 成年之前死去的几率 |
[05:41] | is 936,000 to one. I did the math. | 微乎其微 我算过了 |
[05:46] | -You did not. -I did not. | -你没有 -我没有 |
[05:48] | I tricked Barry into doing the math. | 我骗巴里算了一下 |
[05:50] | Yeah. | 好吧 |
[05:52] | -Voilà! -Fucking French rat. | 你看! 一惊一乍的 |
[05:54] | Surprise number one. | 第一个惊喜 |
[05:57] | Actually, it’s surprise number two. Surprise number one is that you’re here. | 其实这是第二个惊喜 第一个惊喜是你来了 你的香蕉大麻馅饼是我的最爱 |
[06:01] | -[laughs] -Your banana potpie is my favorite. | |
[06:04] | Almost as good as her Chinese chicken cake. | 差不多跟她的中国鸡肉饼一样好吃 |
[06:07] | So, how’s the recovery going? | 你身体恢复得怎么样? |
[06:09] | Slow and painful. | 又慢又痛苦 |
[06:11] | To keep my mind off it, | 为了转移注意力 |
[06:13] | -I was watching one of Marge’s videos. -[gasps] | 我刚才在看玛吉的视频 |
[06:17] | Marge posted another video? Let me see. Let me see! | 玛吉又上传视频了!快让我看看! |
[06:21] | Keep your eye on the postal worker’s hamburger | 在邮递员在经过鸵鸟时 |
[06:25] | as she passes the ostrich. | 你要盯着她的汉堡 天哪!玛吉上传的视频都是经典 |
[06:27] | [laughs] | |
[06:30] | Oh, God. Oh, Marge only posts gold. | |
[06:33] | Oh, you’ve got to share this. | 你得分享这个视频 |
[06:35] | What he’s got to do is rest. | 他现在要做的是休息 |
[06:37] | All right. I’ll share it. | 好吧 我分享一下 |
[06:39] | [laughs] | |
[06:40] | -Frankie… is… dying. -[keyboard clacking] | “弗兰基要笑死了 |
[06:43] | But… I can’t… watch. | 但我不能看 |
[06:46] | -I’m in too… much… pain. -[post transmits] | 我太痛苦了” 我去开门 |
[06:49] | -[doorbell rings] -Oh, I’ll get it! I’ll get it! | |
[06:55] | [chuckles] | |
[06:56] | [exhales] | |
[06:57] | Without further ado, surprise number deux! | 闲话少说 第二个惊喜! |
[07:03] | [Frankie laughs] | |
[07:12] | No, it’s– it’s not personal, Bud. It’s just that your driving sucks. | 不 巴德 不是针对你 只是你的开车技术太烂 |
[07:16] | How is that not personal? | 这怎么不是针对我了? |
[07:20] | You’re obviously still mad about the Jessica thing. | 你显然还在为杰西卡一事而生气 你怎么会这么想? |
[07:22] | [scoffs] What makes you think that? | |
[07:24] | Because for 55 minutes in therapy, | 因为在55分钟的咨询时间里 |
[07:25] | you kept saying you were still mad about the Jessica thing. | 你不停地说你还在为杰西卡一事生气 |
[07:28] | What do I have to do to fix this? | 我要怎么做才能解决此事? |
[07:29] | Be over it. Like, why are you still hung up on her? | 翻篇 你干嘛还迷恋她? |
[07:33] | -‘Cause you lost your virginity to her? -I’m not hung up on her. | -就因为你的第一次给了她? -我没有迷恋她 |
[07:36] | Prove it. Once and for all. | 那就证明这一点 一劳永逸 |
[07:39] | Fine. I will call the beach house and tell Coyote and Jessica that we’re coming over. | 好吧 我会打到海滨别墅 告诉凯奥迪和杰西卡我们要过去了 |
[07:43] | Yeah. How do you know they’re there? | 嗯 你怎么知道他们在那儿? |
[07:47] | I follow her Instagram. | 我关注她的Instagram? |
[07:51] | You’re gonna love the Rise Up, | 你会爱上升起马桶的 |
[07:53] | but not nearly as much as surprise number three. | 但远不及第三个惊喜 |
[07:56] | It’s even more fun than the toilet. | 比马桶还要有趣 |
[07:58] | -That’s hard to imagine. -Yeah, uh… | -这就很难猜了 -是啊… |
[08:01] | Speaking of, when– when is the surprise gonna get here? | 对了 那个惊喜什么时候到? |
[08:03] | Any time now. But Grace, remember, na-boo tah-tah ah-noo Jack-Jack dah-boh. | 随时会到 不过 格蕾丝 你记住 |
[08:09] | Are you having another stroke? | 你又中风了吗? |
[08:11] | It’s Furbish, the language spoken by all Furbies and friends of Furby, | 我说的是菲比语 这是所有菲比 以及菲比的朋友们说的语言 |
[08:15] | which you clearly are not. | 显然你不是菲比的朋友 |
[08:17] | Well, at least we’re off the French. | 至少我们不说法语了 |
[08:19] | Simply translated, “Don’t ask Jack for anything.” | 简单翻译来说就是 不要向杰克请求任何事 |
[08:23] | -Who’s Jack? -Well, he’s an Aquarius, | 杰克是谁? 他是水瓶座 |
[08:26] | or a Type Four Enneagram, if that paints a better picture for you. | 或者九型人格里的第四种类型 希望这些能帮你了解这个人 |
[08:30] | -It does not. -No, it’s Jack Ayres. | 并没有帮助 不 就是杰克艾尔斯 |
[08:33] | Frankie’s new boyfriend. | 弗兰基的新男友 |
[08:35] | You’re gonna love him. | 你一定会喜欢他的 |
[08:38] | Jack Ayres? | 杰克艾尔斯? |
[08:40] | Is that the Jack Ayres who was in the music business? | 是音乐界的那位杰克艾尔斯吗? |
[08:44] | I guess he’s a celebrity in his own right. | 我想他本身就是名人吧 |
[08:47] | Grace, maybe he’ll sit on our toilet. | 格蕾丝 也许他会用我们的马桶呢 |
[08:51] | You know, the music business is full of characters. | 你知道吧 音乐界满是怪人 |
[08:54] | Lots of, you know, playas. | 有很多 花花公子 |
[08:58] | Please don’t ever say that again. | 请不要再说这个词了 |
[08:59] | You guys are so sweet to worry, | 你们两个担心让我很感动 |
[09:02] | but I promise, he’s a great guy. | 但我保证他是个好人 |
[09:04] | That’s why I want you to meet him. | 所以我才想让你们见见他 |
[09:07] | Frankie… | 弗兰基… 这个人…结过婚吗? |
[09:09] | uh, has this guy ever been married? | |
[09:13] | Yes, to a terrible woman who almost ruined his life. | 结过 跟一个几乎毁了他人生的 可怕女人结过婚 |
[09:16] | She and her bastard lawyers took him for everything he had. | 那个女人和其混蛋律师们 抢走了他所拥有的一切 |
[09:23] | I think we have our next surprise. | 我想我们的下一个惊喜就要到了 |
[09:24] | We’re the bastards. | 我们就是她说的混蛋 |
[09:29] | What? A gift for me? | 这什么? 送我的礼物? |
[09:33] | Just for being you. | 只因为你人好 |
[09:34] | [exhales] | |
[09:38] | “6:00 p.m. couples massage at Helaine & Maris.” | 海莲与马里斯会所下午6点双人按摩 |
[09:42] | -I like. -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. | 我喜欢 |
[09:44] | “Dinner at Justin Ryan’s.” I like more. | 在贾斯汀瑞安餐厅吃晚餐 我更喜欢了! |
[09:49] | -You forgot to write on this one. -Oh, no. Did I? | 你忘了在这张上写了 哎呀 是吗? |
[09:52] | Or is the rest of the night just a mystery? | 还是晚上剩下的时光很神秘? |
[09:54] | I mean, not for me, because I planned it. But… | 不是给我的 因为是我安排的 是给你准备的 |
[09:56] | [clears throat] …for you. | |
[09:59] | [knocking] | |
[10:01] | -Hello, people of Earth. -[chuckles] Guilty. | 地球人 你们好 惭愧 我们只是过来表示感谢的 感谢你们当孩子的监护人 |
[10:03] | [laughs] We just came by to deliver a small thank you | |
[10:06] | for being the baby’s guardian. | |
[10:08] | [gasps] | |
[10:10] | And… | 还有… |
[10:11] | -for you. -Wow. | -给你的! -哇! |
[10:17] | -Where does it open? -No. | 这个怎么打开? -这个是…打不开的 -对 |
[10:19] | -That’s just… It is what it is. -Yeah. | |
[10:20] | -Very nice. Thank you. -[Liz] Yeah. | -真好 谢谢 -不客气 |
[10:22] | -Did you get this from our parking lot? -A little further. [chuckles] | 是从我们的停车场捡的吗? 要远一点 |
[10:25] | It’s actually a volcanic rock I picked up at the summit of Mount Cotopaxi. | 它其实是我在科托帕希火山的 山顶捡的一块火山石 是你那次跳伞 差点掉进火山里的那次吗? |
[10:29] | Oh, is that from where you parachuted and almost landed inside the volcano? | |
[10:33] | -Yeah. -Mm-hmm. | |
[10:34] | -That was a close one. -[exhales in relief] | 那次真的好险啊 |
[10:36] | Oh, God, wow. | 我的天啊! |
[10:39] | Is that a joke or…? | 这是玩笑吗? |
[10:41] | -No, it happened. -[Erin and Liz] Yeah. | -不是 是真的 -嗯 |
[10:43] | I didn’t know that you had broken your leg, Liz. | 都不知道你弄折了腿 莉兹 是不是… 你跳伞弄折的? |
[10:45] | Is that… that’s from the parachuting? | |
[10:48] | [chuckles] No, no. Helicopter skiing. | 不是 是直升机滑雪 |
[10:50] | Oh. | |
[10:51] | It’s not broken. It’s shattered. | 不是折 是粉碎性骨折 |
[10:54] | Oof. | |
[10:55] | -Just… [explosive sound] -Yeah. Ugh. | 就那么… 是啊 |
[10:58] | You… Did you say helicopter skiing? | 你说的是直升机滑雪? |
[11:00] | -Yeah. -Well, not, of course, while I’m pregnant. | 对 当然不是我怀孕期间 不过等这个小东西生出来 |
[11:02] | [chuckles] But as soon as this bambino bungees out of me, | |
[11:05] | I’m gonna get back in shape and go to Pamplona. | 我就要恢复身材 然后去潘普洛纳 潘普洛纳!和公牛一起赛跑 是吧? |
[11:09] | Oh, Pamplona! Run with the bulls, right on. | |
[11:11] | [Erin and Liz chuckle] | |
[11:12] | [chuckles] | |
[11:14] | How long after the baby is born? Like 18 years after? | 孩子出生后多久呢?18年之后吗? |
[11:17] | That sounds good. | 听上去不错 |
[11:19] | The kid goes to college, | 到时孩子去上大学 |
[11:20] | Liz flies into a volcano, everybody’s happy. | 莉兹飞向火山 皆大欢喜 |
[11:23] | Hmm. | |
[11:24] | You’re so full of life. | 你的人生很充实 |
[11:27] | [mouthing] | |
[11:28] | But for how much longer? | 但能持续多久呢? |
[11:31] | That’s what I wonder. | 这是我想知道的 |
[11:34] | [softly] Grace, do you remember Pamela Sugarman? | 格蕾丝! 你还记得帕梅拉舒格曼吗? |
[11:37] | The woman Sol and I represented? | 我和索尔代理的那个案子? 你干嘛不直接问我 是否还记得那个海滨别墅 |
[11:39] | Well, why don’t you just ask me if I remember the beach house? | |
[11:42] | That divorce paid for it. | 那个离婚案的佣金 |
[11:44] | Guess who Pamela Sugarman was married to? | 你猜帕梅拉舒格曼的前夫是谁? |
[11:47] | [whispers] I’ll give you a hint. He’s gonna be here any minute. | 我给你一个提示 他随时都会到这儿来! |
[11:51] | Jack is the guy you raked over the coals? | 杰克就是你们当时 火力全开对付的那个人? |
[11:54] | At our client’s insistence. | 我们的委托人坚持要我们这么做的 |
[11:56] | -So now what? Do we tell Frankie? -[Grace exhales] | 现在怎么办?我们要告诉弗兰基吗? |
[11:58] | Of course we tell Frankie. It’s telling Jack I’m worried about! | 当然要告诉弗兰基 我担心的是告诉杰克! |
[12:01] | [whispers] We do not tell Frankie. | 我们不能告诉弗兰基 |
[12:04] | She is extremely happy with this guy, | 她对这个男人非常满意 |
[12:07] | and I need a face for my toilet. | 而且我的马桶需要代言人 |
[12:09] | Remember when the judge awarded Pamela everything? | 你还记得法官 把所有东西都判给帕梅拉时吗? |
[12:13] | Jack broke out in hives, | 杰克的荨麻疹犯了 |
[12:15] | and the bailiff had to handcuff him | 法警不得不铐上他 |
[12:17] | to stop him from scratching himself to death. | 以防他把自己挠死 |
[12:19] | -So, what do we do if Jack recognizes us? -[scoffs] That was 20 years ago. | 要是杰克认出我们来 我们该怎么办? 那都是20年前的事了 而且你们俩老了 |
[12:23] | And neither one of you has aged well. | |
[12:26] | We were only in court together one time, | 我们只一起出庭过一次 |
[12:28] | and he only saw my left profile. | 而且他只见过我的左边脸 |
[12:31] | Plus he was crying a lot, so it was probably blurry. | 再说 他当时哭得很厉害 所以视线很可能是模糊的 |
[12:36] | And I think I had a beard back then. | 我记得我那时候有胡子遮脸吧 |
[12:38] | You did. Me. | 是啊 我才是你的遮掩吧 |
[12:42] | [laughs] | |
[12:43] | -Well… here we all are… -[Allison chuckles nervously] | 这个嘛… 我们都到齐了 真好 |
[12:46] | …which is totally chill. | |
[12:47] | [Jessica chuckles] | |
[12:48] | Uh, Allison, of course you know my brother, Coyote. | 艾莉森 你认识我弟弟凯奥迪 |
[12:51] | And this is his girlfriend, Jessica. | 这位是他的女友杰西卡 |
[12:55] | Jessica, this is my beautiful, radiant, patient– | 杰西卡 这位 是我漂亮夺目 -超有耐心的… -我叫艾莉森 |
[13:01] | I’m Allison. Hi. | |
[13:03] | -[chuckles] Hi. -Hi. | -你好 -你好 |
[13:04] | -We have a daughter together. -Yeah. | -我们俩有了女儿 -对 |
[13:06] | Who we made from doing it. | 我们爱爱的产物 |
[13:08] | Is this why you came here? To do whatever this is? | 这就是你来一趟的原因吗? 就为了说这些? |
[13:12] | -It’s really great to meet you. -Yeah. | 很高兴见到你 我也是 |
[13:14] | Anyway, I-I came here to tell you and to show you | 总之 我是来告诉你们 给你看看 |
[13:19] | that I’m in a very good place. I’m happy. We’re happy. | 我现在过得很好 我很幸福 我们很幸福! |
[13:22] | Yeah, we’re really happy. | 对 我们非常幸福 |
[13:24] | And I want you guys to be happy. | 我也希望你们俩幸福 |
[13:26] | So, Coyote, I’m sorry, and I want to bury the hatchet. | 所以 凯奥迪 对不起 我想和你言归于好 |
[13:32] | Me, too. | 我也是 |
[13:34] | Hug it out? | 我们抱一下? |
[13:36] | [hugging grunts] | |
[13:37] | [Bud chuckles] | |
[13:38] | And Jessica, I-I’m so glad that we could bury the hatchet, too. | 还有杰西卡 我很高兴 我们也可以捐弃前嫌 我们捐弃的到底是什么前嫌? |
[13:41] | Oh. [slight chuckle] | |
[13:42] | Uh, exactly what hatchet are we burying? | |
[13:45] | Well, you know… how things ended. | 事情结束的方式 |
[13:48] | Ended? | 结束? |
[13:50] | They barely started. We dated for, like, six weeks. | 事情才刚开始 我们才约会了六周 |
[13:52] | Oh. | |
[13:53] | I mean, how abruptly and brutally you broke up with me. | 我是指你跟我分手 分得多么突然和无情 |
[13:59] | Well, I wouldn’t say it was brutal. | 我不觉得无情 |
[14:02] | H-How was it not? | 怎么不会呢? |
[14:03] | I mean, just the night before, we had such an incredible time. | 就在分手的前夜 我们还度过了难忘时光 |
[14:06] | Remember, on your pleather couch? | 在你的仿皮沙发上 还记得吗? |
[14:09] | We polished off a glass of Carlo Rossi, we were both feeling a bit toasted? | 我们都很快喝完了一杯加州乐事 我们两个都感觉很美好 |
[14:13] | We had just watched the Felicity marathon? | 我们还看了《费丽丝蒂》长剧 |
[14:16] | It was a big moment. | 很难忘的时刻 |
[14:18] | Ah, it wasn’t that big. | 也没怎么难忘 那部长剧都播了一千次了 |
[14:19] | [scoffs] No, they ran that marathon, like, a thousand times. | |
[14:21] | -Oh, I know, I keep missing it. -Me, too. | 我知道 我一直很怀念 我也是 |
[14:24] | I lost my virginity to you that night! | 那晚我把我的第一次给了你 |
[14:29] | -You what? -You probably didn’t know this, | 你的什么? 你可能不知道这事 但我当时还是个处男 他当时还是处男 |
[14:31] | -but I was still a virgin. -[whispers] He was a virgin. | |
[14:35] | And you probably don’t know this, after that night, you still were a virgin. | 你可能不知道 那晚之后 你还是处男 |
[14:43] | Ah. [slight chuckle] | |
[14:44] | And to think, I was worried it would be weird coming here. | 我还担心来这里会很奇怪 |
[14:50] | Frankie, maybe you should call Jack. | 弗兰基 也许你应该给杰克打个电话 |
[14:53] | I’m not sure I have the strength for another surprise. | 我不确定自己是否还有力气 再接受一个惊喜 |
[14:57] | I’ve already had the banana potpie and the toilet. | 我已经有了香蕉大麻馅饼和马桶了 |
[15:01] | And while those two pair delightfully… | 而这两个惊喜很搭呢… |
[15:04] | [doorbell rings] | |
[15:05] | Oh, too late! | 太迟了 |
[15:12] | Hey, Mr. Tambourine Man. | 嘿 手鼓先生 |
[15:14] | -[chuckles] -Come in. Come in! | 快请进 |
[15:17] | Hey, everybody, come here and meet Jack. | 嘿 各位 过来认识杰克 |
[15:21] | Jack, this is– | 杰克 这位是… |
[15:22] | I’m Bobby. He’s Solly. | 我是鲍比 他是索利 |
[15:24] | Oh, be cool, fools. | 你们两个傻瓜 冷静 不能因为杰克以前在音乐圈 |
[15:25] | You cats don’t have to be hip in front of Jack | |
[15:28] | just because he was in the music biz. Ya feel me? | 你们俩就在他面前装酷抖机灵 懂我意思吧? |
[15:32] | Uh, well, Solly, then I think this is for you. | 索利 那我想这个是给你的 |
[15:35] | Thank you so much. I love it. | 太谢谢了 我很喜欢 荣幸之至 |
[15:38] | [Jack] Ah, it’s an honor. | |
[15:40] | Frankie raves about you. | 弗兰基经常夸赞你 |
[15:42] | And that’s rare to hear about an ex. | 很少有人这么评价前任 |
[15:45] | I raved about my ex-wife too, but I was in an institution. | 我也夸赞过我的前妻 不过我当时是在精神病院 多亏了弗兰基 我现在对这事不藏着掖着了 |
[15:49] | Uh, thanks to Frankie, I’m… I’m open about that now. | |
[15:52] | Sounds like you’re in a very good place and don’t want to look back. | 听上去你现在的状况很好 不想回顾过去了 |
[15:57] | I feel like I’ve met you two before. | 我感觉我之前见过你们俩 |
[16:00] | Were you in that gay Simon & Garfunkel cover band in the ’70s? | 你们是1970年代西蒙和加芬克尔 同性恋翻唱乐队里的吗? |
[16:03] | -No. -Yes. | -是的 -不是 |
[16:04] | Actually, Bobby is an actor, | 其实 鲍比是个演员 |
[16:07] | and Solly dabbles in activism. | 索利涉足激进主义 |
[16:10] | Yeah, Bobby, why don’t you get out of here and whip up a snack for Jack? | 对了 鲍比 你干嘛不 离开这里 去给杰克弄点点心呢? 我告诉你点心在哪儿 |
[16:14] | [Sol] Oh, let me show you where the snacks are. | |
[16:17] | I swear, if it wasn’t for those month-long benders with Iggy Pop, | 我发誓 如果不是和 伊基波普狂欢作乐一整月 |
[16:21] | I’d be able to tell you how I know them. | 我就能告诉你们我是怎么认识他们的 感谢波普先生 |
[16:23] | [slight chuckle] Thank heaven for Mr. Pop. | |
[16:25] | [laughs] | |
[16:27] | Frankie, you need to check on the plumber. | 弗兰基 -你得去看看管道工 -为什么我去? -你怎么不能去? -好吧 |
[16:29] | -Why me? -Why not you? | |
[16:31] | Sold. | |
[16:32] | But remember, na-boo ta-tah Jack-Jack. | 但你别忘了! |
[16:36] | One of my biggest regrets in life is that I never learned Furbish. | 我这辈子最大的一个遗憾 是我从没学过菲比语 |
[16:39] | So, I-I hear you know a lot of celebrities. | 我听说你认识很多名人? |
[16:42] | Would one of them want to be a spokesperson | 他们中有人愿意为一款 |
[16:44] | for a sexy new product for the elderly? | 性感的老年新产品做代言人吗? |
[16:46] | What kind of sexy product? | 什么样的性感产品呢? |
[16:48] | Well, that’s between me and the celebrity you get us. | 这只能我和… 你给我们找的名人之间谈了 过滤嘴就是垃圾 |
[16:54] | Oh. Hmm. | |
[16:56] | -[exhales] -Filters are bullshit. | |
[16:59] | They’re better for the baby. | 对宝宝好 |
[17:00] | She’s lighting up again, Barry. She’s lighting up again! | 巴里 她又点了一支烟 -她又点了一支烟 -她对宝宝感到紧张 |
[17:03] | She’s nervous about the baby. | |
[17:05] | [exhales] | |
[17:07] | You never told me they were death-defying lesbians. | 你从没告诉我她们是玩命冒险的拉拉 |
[17:11] | Swimming to Alcatraz during El Niño does not make them death-defying. | 在厄尔尼诺期间游向恶魔岛 并没有让她们玩命冒险 |
[17:15] | You allowed me to allow you to sign those papers, | 明知那个老烟鬼和那个找死的主 |
[17:18] | knowing that Chain Smoker and Death Wish out there are having your baby. | 要怀你的孩子 你还让我允许你签那些文件 |
[17:23] | Liz and Erin are going to be great moms because they drink life up. | 莉兹和艾琳会是好妈妈的 -因为她们人生活得很明白! -天哪 这里只有我一个人没疯吗? |
[17:26] | Oh, my God. Am I the only one here who isn’t fucking insane? | |
[17:29] | How are they going to be great moms if they are not alive to raise this kid? | 如果她们没命养孩子 怎么能当好妈妈呢? |
[17:32] | You need to do something. | 你需要想想办法! |
[17:34] | What am I gonna do, tell them not to live their lives? | 我怎么做 告诉她们别过那种生活? |
[17:36] | No, tell them not to end them. | 不 告诉她们不要结束那种生活 她们回来了 听我说 |
[17:37] | [coughs] | |
[17:39] | -[Erin clears throat] -[exhales] | |
[17:41] | Okay, here’s the deal. | |
[17:44] | Both of you need to start acting like you’re having a child. Okay? | 你们两个需要开始表现得 像个就要有孩子的人 好吗? |
[17:48] | You… | 你… |
[17:50] | stop jumping into volcanoes. | 不要再往火山里跳了 |
[17:55] | And you, quit the smokes, Marlboro Mom. | 而你把烟戒了 万宝路妈妈! |
[17:58] | And what exactly do you know about being a mother? | 你对当母亲了解什么? |
[18:00] | That I’m not going to be one. | 我不会当母亲 但如果我当了 以下生活里的恶习我都会戒掉 |
[18:01] | But if I were, here’s the things that I’d give up in my own life: | |
[18:05] | my morning vape, | 早上的电子烟 |
[18:06] | following people who cut me off in traffic, | 跟踪开车时抢我道的人 |
[18:09] | my afternoon vape, | 下午的电子烟 |
[18:11] | shower beers… | 冲澡时的啤酒 |
[18:13] | What else, what else, what else, what else? | 还有什么? 我想起来了! 往火山里跳! |
[18:14] | Oh, I know, jumping into volcanoes. | |
[18:21] | -[exhales] -[clears throat] | |
[18:22] | Brianna, we really appreciate your concern… | 布丽安娜 我们很感谢你的关心 |
[18:27] | But fuck off. | 但请你滚开 |
[18:28] | -It’s our lives. -[Erin] Yeah. | 这是我们的生活 |
[18:30] | Excuse me. | 借过一下 |
[18:31] | Wow. She just ran over my foot. | 哎呀 她刚从我脚上压过去了 你知道吗? 我想她们没有感谢你的关心 |
[18:34] | Ow. | |
[18:36] | [exhales] You know what, I don’t think they appreciate your concern. | |
[18:42] | I haven’t spoken to Stevie Nicks in 20 years, | 我都20年没跟史蒂薇妮克丝联系了 |
[18:45] | but sure, I’d be glad to call her | 不过没问题 我很乐意给她打个电话 请她坐在马桶上做广告代言 |
[18:47] | and ask her to sit on a toilet in a commercial. | |
[18:49] | Oh, that would be great, thanks. | 那真是太好了 谢谢你 |
[18:51] | And again, keep this between us. | 还有 这事只有我们俩人知道 |
[18:53] | Oh, I’m not even gonna tell Stevie Nicks. | 我甚至都不会告诉史蒂薇妮克丝 |
[18:56] | Grace, you promised me! | 格蕾丝 你答应了我的! |
[18:58] | -Frankie, how’s it going with the toilet? -Oh, your sweet toilet nothings | 弗兰基 马桶怎么样了? 你那充满关爱的话对我不管用 |
[19:01] | won’t work on me. | |
[19:03] | I may not have been able to hear you, but this robot in my ear did. | 我自己可能没法听到你说话 但我的这个助听器都听到了 |
[19:07] | I heard everything you just said. | 你刚才说的我都听到了 |
[19:09] | And I think I’ve just picked up an FM radio station. | 我想我刚接收到了一个调频电台 |
[19:13] | Leave some extra time for yourself if you’re heading to San Miguel. Ugh! | 说如果你要去圣米格尔赌场 得给自己留一些额外的时间 |
[19:17] | [grunts] Oh, God. | 天啊 |
[19:21] | [Jack chuckles] | |
[19:26] | -Were you at Reggae on the River in ’94? -Ya, mon. | -你去过1994年河上雷鬼音乐节吗? -去过 |
[19:32] | Now you get a hearing aid? | 现在你倒戴上助听器了! |
[19:33] | For years, I had to throw cheese at you to get your attention. | 这么多年来 我只有朝你扔奶酪 才能引起你的注意 |
[19:37] | I got it so I can hear Jack, | 我用助听器为的是能听到杰克说话 不是为了听到你 做我不让你做的那件事 |
[19:38] | not to hear you do the one thing I asked you not to do. | |
[19:42] | You do seven things a day I ask you not to do. | 我不让你做的事 你照样一天做七件 |
[19:44] | Actually, I do more. You catch seven. | 其实我做的更多 你只逮着了七件 |
[19:47] | But I caught you this time. | 但这次我逮着你了 |
[19:49] | Frankie, if we don’t do something big soon, | 弗兰基 如果我们不尽快 做点大事的话 |
[19:53] | Rise Up is not gonna happen. | 升起不会成功的 |
[19:56] | This is our company’s second act. | 这是我们公司的第二春 |
[19:58] | I mean, it’s-it’s-it’s our second act. | 这是我们的第二春 |
[20:01] | Isn’t it worth asking Jack for just a little celebrity endorsement? | 请杰克找名人稍微支持一下 难道不值得吗? |
[20:05] | Not at the expense of my relationship. | 不能以我的感情关系为代价 那我的感情关系呢? |
[20:08] | Oh… What about my relationship? | |
[20:10] | Nick landed an hour ago, | 尼克一个小时前下的飞机 |
[20:11] | and I’m still here, trying to make something happen. | 而我还在这儿努力把这事儿搞定 |
[20:14] | So go home and ask him to invest. | 那你就回家去 让他投资 |
[20:17] | You know I don’t want to do that. | 你知道我不想那么做 |
[20:18] | Right, because you think it will sabotage your relationship, | 对 因为你认为那样 会破坏你们的关系 |
[20:22] | but apparently, it’s okay to sabotage mine. | 但显然破坏我的感情关系没事 |
[20:25] | [Grace exhales] | |
[20:26] | I liked you better when you couldn’t hear. | 我还是更喜欢你听不到的时候 |
[20:34] | Bud, we didn’t have sex that night. | 巴德 我们那晚没做爱 |
[20:36] | Excuse me, it still counts if you don’t climax. Right, Allison? | 不好意思 就算你没高潮也算 是吧 艾莉森? |
[20:39] | You’re not helping yourself. | 你这样没用的 |
[20:40] | We didn’t have sex because you didn’t actually, you know… | 我们没有做爱 因为你没有真正… |
[20:45] | stick the landing. | “正常着陆” |
[20:47] | -Oh, honey. -Oh, Bud. | -亲爱的… -巴德 |
[20:48] | Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. W-What are you talking about? | 等等 你在说什么呢? |
[20:51] | I-I-I remember having sex. | 我记得做了爱 你做了爱 但不是和我 我记得非常清楚 |
[20:52] | Oh, you had sex. Just not with me. | |
[20:57] | But I remember it very clearly. | |
[20:59] | We drank. | 我们喝了酒 |
[21:01] | We were exhausted from all those hours of Felicity’s emotions. | 我们被费丽丝蒂几个小时的情绪 搞得筋疲力尽 |
[21:04] | I wore two condoms because I was worried about germs. | 我戴了两层安全套 因为我担心病菌问题 |
[21:06] | -There’s the man I married. -So far this all tracks. | 这才是我嫁的男人 目前都说得通 |
[21:09] | And we were on your soft, cushy sofa. | 我们当时在你柔软舒适的沙发上 |
[21:11] | Bud, you fucked the couch. | 巴德 你和沙发做了爱 |
[21:13] | -Oh, God. -Story still tracks. | 天哪 仍然说得通 |
[21:23] | I fucked the couch. | 我和沙发做了爱 |
[21:27] | [Frankie exhales] | |
[21:30] | Why don’t we get to know each other a little better? | 我们干嘛不多了解一下彼此呢? |
[21:33] | ♪ Dumb-tiddy-dumb-tiddy-dumb-tiddy-dumb ♪ | 哑口无言 |
[21:37] | Except for Grace, ’cause she’s… | 除了格蕾丝 因为她 |
[21:39] | ♪ Dumb-diddy-dumb-diddy-dumb-diddy-dumb ♪ [laughs] | 哑口无言 |
[21:42] | Can you get her a record deal off that? | 你能给她灌制一张唱片吗? |
[21:44] | -[Jack chuckles] -[Frankie inhales] | |
[21:45] | Jack, you know, you and Robert share a love of music. | 杰克 你和罗伯特都喜欢音乐 |
[21:49] | In fact, he’s an accomplished singer in his own right. | 其实 他本身就是才华横溢的歌手 哦… |
[21:53] | He even has a Tappy. | 他甚至有个塔皮奖 |
[21:55] | Wow, what’s a Tappy? | 塔皮奖是什么? |
[21:57] | -Do you know what a Tony is? -Yes. | -你知道托尼奖是什么吗? -知道 |
[21:59] | Okay, well, then you know what a Tappy is. | 好 那你就知道塔皮奖是什么 |
[22:01] | Except the awards show is in a Dress Barn. | 除了颁奖典礼在女装店 |
[22:05] | “Robert Hanson.” | 罗伯特汉森 |
[22:07] | Hanson? | 汉森 |
[22:08] | Hanson. | 汉森 |
[22:10] | -Hanson. -Ow, my cancer! | 汉森 哎哟 我的癌症! |
[22:12] | Oh, no, Solly! | 天哪! 索利! |
[22:15] | -Oh, everyone, quick, go home! -[Sol] Ow! Ow! | 大家都赶紧回家吧! |
[22:17] | -[Sol] Oh! -Hanson and Bergstein? | 汉森和伯格斯丁? |
[22:23] | You bloodsucking motherfuckers! | 你们两个该死的混蛋! |
[22:26] | Robert, you are very bad at planning these quiet days at home. | 罗伯特 你在家安排的 静养日子差劲透了 |
[22:42] | Well, I spoke to Erin. | 我和艾琳聊过了 |
[22:45] | They’ve, uh, calmed down a bit. | 她们冷静下来一些了 |
[22:47] | They’re even letting us keep the rock, so that’s good. | 她们甚至让我们留着那块石头 所以这就挺好 |
[22:50] | Great. And remember, we’ll have to take turns driving the kid to mommy and me. | 很好 记住 我们得轮流带孩子去亲子中心 |
[22:54] | And, of course, we’ll have to pay for Junior’s therapy | 当然了 我们得付少年心理咨询费 |
[22:56] | after losing both mommies | 因为孩子失去了两个妈妈 |
[22:58] | to a great white shark and a carton of Reds. | 一个葬身大白鲨 一个死于万宝路 |
[23:00] | Let’s not forget how much you’re gonna fuck the kid up. | 别忘了孩子会被你影响成什么样 |
[23:04] | -That’s not funny, Barry. -Agreed. | 这不好笑 巴里 同意 |
[23:07] | And the part I find particularly unfunny | 我觉得特别不好笑的是 |
[23:09] | is that the only reason you agreed to become a guardian | 你同意当监护人 |
[23:11] | is because you thought it was never gonna happen. | 只因你以为这事成不了 |
[23:13] | Yeah. That’s why everyone agrees to be a guardian. | 对 大家都是这样才会同意当监护人啊 |
[23:17] | Not me. | 我不这么想 |
[23:18] | Wait, wait, is this the reason you had me do that math? | 等等 这就是你让我算概率的原因? |
[23:21] | You never told me that these women have a death wish. | 你从没告诉我这两个女人一心想死 |
[23:25] | Interesting, because you never told me the supposedly nice thing you did for me | 有意思 因为你从没告诉我 你为我做的所谓好事 |
[23:28] | was solely for your own benefit. | 完全是为了你自己的利益 |
[23:30] | Shit. | 糟糕 |
[23:31] | That reminds me, we’re gonna be late for our massages. | 这倒提醒了我 我们预约的按摩就要迟到了 |
[23:35] | You know what, I’m sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
[23:36] | No, don’t be. | 不用 我也忘了这茬了 我抱歉竟然请你做这事 |
[23:37] | -I mean, I forgot about it, too. -I’m sorry I ever asked you to do this. | |
[23:43] | Okay. | 好吧 |
[23:45] | Now I feel bad. | 我现在倒觉得不好意思了 |
[23:47] | You know, I get it, you don’t like to commit to things. | 我明白了 你不喜欢承诺什么 |
[23:51] | You made that perfectly clear the first three times I proposed to you. | 我向你求婚的前三次 你都表示得很清楚了 |
[23:54] | And I’m okay with that. | 我不介意 |
[23:56] | But it was stupid of me to ask you to commit to this. | 但我真蠢 竟然让你承诺这事 |
[23:59] | Well, don’t beat yourself up. | 别责怪自己了 |
[24:04] | But I am committed to this. | 但我为此作了承诺 |
[24:06] | I know you are. | 我知道 |
[24:08] | So can we not stress about it and…? | 我们可以不要为此有压力吗? |
[24:10] | We have a policy about not talking about the future in this relationship, right? | 我们说好了不在这段关系中谈论未来 |
[24:14] | So let’s not start now. | 对吧?所以我们现在不要谈 |
[24:16] | Yes, exactly. I mean, who knows where this kid is even gonna be in the future? | 对 没错 谁知道这个孩子未来会在哪儿? |
[24:20] | Right. Who knows where we’ll be in the future? | 对 谁知道我们未来会在哪儿? |
[24:23] | Or if we’ll even be in the future. | 或者说我们还会有未来吗? |
[24:28] | That’s how we do things, right? | 这就是我们的处事方式 对吧? |
[24:36] | Right. | 对 |
[24:40] | [heavy breaths] | |
[24:45] | What’s happening? | 什么情况? |
[24:46] | Those two… those two ruined my life! | 这两个… 这两个人毁了我的人生 |
[24:50] | What did these two life-ruiners do to you? | 这两个人做了什么毁了你的人生? |
[24:53] | Sol, I know you’re hurt and can’t run, but do you mind if I do? | 我知道你疼得跑不了 但你介意我跑掉吗? |
[24:56] | I’ll race you. | 我会和你赛跑 |
[25:00] | Uh, will someone please tell me what’s going on? | 谁能告诉我这是怎么回事吗? |
[25:02] | -They… they… they… -[Grace clears throat] | 他们… |
[25:04] | Remember… Remember the Sugarman divorce from a million years ago? | 你还记得很多年前的 舒格曼离婚案吗? |
[25:08] | No. | 不记得 |
[25:10] | -You know, Pamela Sugarman. -[scoffs] | 帕梅拉舒格曼 |
[25:12] | -The big case that went on forever. -[yells] And ever! | 持续了很长时间的离婚大案 长到折磨人! |
[25:16] | We bought the beach house with that money. | 我们用那笔钱买了海滨别墅 |
[25:18] | [yells] My money! | 我的钱! |
[25:19] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 你是帕梅拉舒格曼先生? |
[25:21] | You’re Mr. Pamela Sugarman? | |
[25:24] | That’s right. And your ex-husband ripped out my guts, | 没错 你的前夫扯出我的肠子 用火烤了 然后吃了 最后还让我付账 |
[25:27] | flame-broiled them, ate them, and then stuck me with the bill. | |
[25:31] | Her ex-husband did it, too. | 他的前夫也参与了! |
[25:33] | Sol Bergstein is the guy you’ve been raving about? | 你一直夸赞的家伙 就是索尔伯格斯丁? |
[25:36] | The great guy you’d still be married to if he wasn’t gay? | 如果不是同性恋 还是你老公的好男人? |
[25:39] | -I want my tambourine back. -Get the man his tambourine. | 请把手鼓还给我 把他的手鼓拿给他 |
[25:42] | Look, I’m as shocked as you are, but Sol was just doing his job. | 听着 我跟你一样震惊 但索尔当年只是在做本职工作 |
[25:46] | Was it his job to destroy my life? | 毁了我的人生也是他的工作吗? |
[25:49] | I don’t know the particulars. | 我不了解详情 |
[25:51] | I can’t be around that guy! | 这家伙不能出现在我身边! |
[25:53] | Oh, don’t you think that’s a little childish? | 你不觉得这样有点幼稚吗? |
[25:55] | Is not! | 这不是幼稚! |
[25:56] | Those two guys are toxic for me. | 这两个人让我无法忍受 |
[25:59] | But Sol is part of my family. | 但索尔是我的家人! |
[26:01] | Look, if you need Sol in your life, we’re not gonna work. | 如果你的生活离不开索尔 那我们是没有结果的 |
[26:06] | -[Frankie gasps] -Oh. | |
[26:07] | Jack, are you an idiot? | 杰克 你是白痴吗? |
[26:09] | Yes! Your ex-husband had me legally declared an idiot. | 我是! 你的前夫让我被合法地宣布为白痴 |
[26:13] | [whispers] Oh, yeah. We needed to redo the patio. | 对了 我们需要重整露台 |
[26:18] | I get it, Jack. Sol did a terrible thing to you. | 杰克 我明白了 索尔严重地伤害了你 |
[26:21] | He did a terrible thing to me too. | 他也严重地伤害了我 |
[26:24] | But I was able to move past it. | 但我已经翻篇了 |
[26:26] | So you can go out that door, | 所以你也可以迈过去 |
[26:29] | but if you don’t let go of your anger, it doesn’t matter how far you walk, | 但如果你不释怀自己的怨念 不管你走多远 |
[26:33] | it’ll follow you. | 它都会纠缠你的 |
[26:36] | But I won’t. | 但我不会 |
[26:41] | I’m so sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
[26:49] | [Jack grunts] | |
[26:53] | I love that toilet! | 我喜欢那个马桶! |
[26:56] | It’s a brilliant idea. | 真是绝妙的主意 |
[26:57] | I mean, someday, everyone’s going to need that, right? | 有朝一日 大家都会需要它的 对吧? |
[27:01] | There’s your stupid endorsement. | 这就是你要的白痴背书 |
[27:08] | I had sex with a couch. | 我跟沙发做了爱 |
[27:12] | Hey, at least you and Coyote made up. | 嘿 至少你和凯奥迪和好了 |
[27:14] | And now you don’t have resentment towards Jessica anymore. | 现在你也不再怨恨杰西卡了 |
[27:17] | Of course, I can never look her in the face again, | 当然了 我再也无法面对她了 |
[27:19] | because I had sex with a couch. | 因为我和沙发做了爱 |
[27:21] | Forget it. It’s ancient history. | 忘了吧 那都是历史了 |
[27:24] | Revisionist history. | 修正主义历史 |
[27:26] | If I didn’t do it with Jessica, | 如果我那晚没跟杰西卡做爱 |
[27:28] | that means I was still a virgin for another four months, | 那表示之后的四个月里我还是处男 |
[27:31] | until one night of meaningless sex with Laurie Hoonhout. | 直到我和劳里洪豪 发生了无意义的一夜情 |
[27:36] | Your first time was still better than mine. | 你的第一次仍比我的第一次强 |
[27:39] | I… uh… | 我… |
[27:42] | lost my virginity to a clown. | 我的第一次给了一个小丑 |
[27:46] | What do you mean, “a clown”? Like– Like the class clown or a “clown” clown? | 你说的小丑指什么? 班级小丑还是传统小丑? |
[27:50] | I’m talking red nose, squirting flower, | 我说的是红鼻子 戴喷水花 |
[27:53] | came out of a tiny car with 67 other Bozos, Chuckles, and Krustys. | 和其他67个名字滑稽的小丑 从小汽车里出来的那种 你那个小丑叫什么? |
[27:56] | And what– And what was your clown’s name? | |
[27:59] | Uncle Bubbles. | 泡泡叔叔 |
[28:00] | [stifled laughs] | |
[28:02] | You win. | 你赢了 |
[28:04] | Okay, maybe you got off to a bumpy start, but you sure know what goes where now. | 好吧 或许你出师不利 但…你现在很清楚“门道”了 |
[28:10] | [Allison laughs] | |
[28:11] | I am the luckiest man on the planet to have you as my wife. | 有你做我的妻子 我是地球上最幸运的男人 -我们要靠边停车吗? -当然要 |
[28:15] | Mmm. Should we pull over? | |
[28:17] | Absolutely. | |
[28:19] | That back seat’s looking pretty good. | 后座看起来很不错 |
[28:23] | But I look better, right? | 但我看起来更好吧? |
[28:25] | [both chuckle] | |
[28:36] | I was proud of you. | 我为你感到骄傲 |
[28:39] | You did the right thing with Jack. | 你刚才对杰克的态度很对 |
[28:43] | You can go home now, Grace. I know Nick’s back. | 格蕾丝 你现在可以回家了 我知道尼克回来了 是 但我要在这儿陪你 |
[28:46] | [scoffs] Yeah. But I’m here with you. | |
[28:50] | I’m not in the mood to work on Rise Up. | 但我没心情忙升起的事 |
[28:52] | I don’t care about Rise Up right now. I care about you. | 我现在才不关心升起呢 我只关心你 |
[28:56] | And I’m not going anywhere until you feel okay. | 在你心情好点前 我哪儿都不会去 |
[29:00] | I don’t feel okay. | 我心情不好 |
[29:03] | I really liked him. | 我真的喜欢他 |
[29:05] | [Frankie exhales] | |
[29:08] | And I hate that you have to go home. | 我也不喜欢你得回家 |
[29:10] | I really like you, too. | 我也真的喜欢你 |
[29:12] | And I hate that I have to go, too. | 我也不喜欢我得走了 |
[29:18] | [Frankie chuckles] | |
[29:24] | [Jack] You really should lock your front door. | 你真的应该锁上你家前门 |
[29:27] | There’s no way of knowing who might wander in here. | 我们不知道谁会游荡进来 |
[29:29] | I’m glad it was you. | 幸好进来的人是你 |
[29:33] | I… [exhales] | 我… |
[29:35] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
[29:37] | I was a jerk, and then I overreacted. | 我是个混蛋 我反应过度了 |
[29:40] | And you’re right, I-I-I need to get over it. | 你说得对 我需要抛弃怨恨 |
[29:44] | I don’t want to lose you. | 我不想失去你 |
[29:46] | I don’t want you to lose me, either. | 我也不想让你失去我 |
[29:48] | I lose myself enough. | 我够自我迷失了 |
[29:52] | So, we okay? | 那我们没事了? |
[29:54] | Can I have the tambourine back for Sol? | 我可以为索尔要回那个手鼓吗? 当然可以了 |
[29:57] | [exhales] Sure can. | |
[30:01] | Then we’re okay. | 那我们没事了 |
[30:02] | [Jack chuckles] | |
[30:04] | I have to admit, this is a really nice patio. | 我不得不承认 这个露台真好 |
[30:08] | Even if it was built from the salt of my tears. | 即使它是用我的眼泪之盐建的 |
[30:12] | -It is pretty rad. -Yeah. | -这个露台棒极了 -是啊 |
[30:14] | And maybe things turned out better than you think. | 也许事情最后比你想的要好 |
[30:18] | How so? | 此话怎讲? |
[30:19] | If I didn’t have this house, | 如果我没要这栋房子 |
[30:22] | I’d have nothing to invite you in to. | 我就没地方邀请你去了 |
[30:27] | You feel me? | 你懂我吧? |
[30:28] | [“You Baby” by The Mamas & The Papas plays] | |
[30:33] | [Frankie laughs] | |
[30:36] | ♪ From the time I fall asleep Till the morning comes ♪ | |
[30:39] | ♪ I dream about you, baby ♪ | |
[30:42] | ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ | |
[30:44] | ♪ And I feel all right ‘Cause I know tonight ♪ | |
[30:48] | ♪ I’ll be with you, baby ♪ | |
[30:50] | ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ | |
[30:52] | ♪ And who makes me feel like smiling ♪ | |
[30:56] | ♪ When the weary day is through ♪ | |
[31:00] | -♪ You ♪ –♪ You baby, you ♪ | |
[31:03] | ♪ I’m talking about my baby, yeah ♪ | |
[31:05] | ♪ Baby, nobody but you ♪ | |
[31:11] | ♪ It’s the greatest thing Since rock ‘n’ roll ♪ | |
[31:16] | ♪ Yeah, baby ♪ | |
[31:17] | -♪ You ♪ -♪ You baby, you ♪ | |
[31:20] | -♪ I’m talking about my baby, yeah ♪ -♪ No one but you, baby ♪ | |
[31:23] | ♪ Nobody but you ♪ | |
[31:25] | -♪ You ♪ -♪ You baby, you ♪ | |
[31:27] | [woman] Okay, good night! |