| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience. | 《燃情克利夫兰》是在摄影棚观众前现场录制的 |
| [00:04] | Oh, good, Joy, you’re here. | 乔依 正好 你来了 |
| [00:06] | Would you mind helping me for a second? | 你能帮我个忙吗 |
| [00:09] | Sure. What do you want? | 可以 你要我干什么 |
| [00:11] | Just raise your hand. | 举起你的手 |
| [00:12] | Like you’re the Statue of Liberty. | 就好像你是自由女神像 |
| [00:16] | Perfect. | 好极了 |
| [00:17] | Attack! | 攻击 |
| [00:20] | Elka! | 爱尔卡 |
| [00:21] | What’s going on? | 怎么了 |
| [00:21] | She’s trying to get Dummy to attack me. | 她想让傻蛋攻击我 |
| [00:24] | Oh, that’s not his name anymore. | 它现在不叫这名字了 |
| [00:26] | It’s Chance. | 现在叫吉祥 |
| [00:26] | Elka thought the name Dummy was holding him back. | 爱尔卡觉得叫”傻蛋”限制了它的智商 |
| [00:29] | Why are you training him to attack people? | 你为什么要训练它攻击别人 |
| [00:32] | For church. | 为了教堂啊 |
| [00:36] | Attendance has been down, | 出席人数锐减 |
| [00:37] | so the pastor came up with this great idea | 于是牧师想出了一个很棒的主意 |
| [00:39] | to get people in the pews. | 让大家走进教堂 |
| [00:40] | Bible stories told through pets. | 通过宠物来讲述圣经故事 |
| [00:42] | Chance is auditioning for David in “David and Goliath.” | 吉祥要为《大卫与歌利亚》中的大卫一角试镜 |
| [00:47] | If you can’t jump, | 如果你不会跳 |
| [00:48] | they’re just gonna make you another sheep in the manger. | 他们就只能让你演打酱油的绵羊 |
| [00:52] | Oh, give it up. You can’t even get him to sit. | 放弃吧 你都无法让它坐下 |
| [00:54] | Yes, I can. | 我可以的 |
| [00:56] | Sit. | 坐 |
| [00:58] | Sit. | 坐啊 |
| [01:01] | In the kitchen! Good boy! | 坐到厨房去 好孩子 |
| [01:05] | Start measuring him for wool. | 开始给它做绵羊的戏服吧 |
| [01:09] | Hi, guys. | 嗨 姐妹们 |
| [01:11] | I was just thinking. | 我刚刚想着 |
| [01:12] | Isn’t it great that we’re the kind of friends | 我们是那种无话不谈 |
| [01:14] | who can tell each other anything? | 没有秘密的朋友 真是太棒了 |
| [01:16] | You know, without any judgment or recriminations. | 从来不互相评判或是指责彼此 |
| [01:18] | Just love and… forgiveness. | 只有相亲相爱 包容原谅 |
| [01:21] | Which one of us should be nervous right now? | 现在我们俩谁该紧张呢 |
| [01:24] | Nobody, nobody. | 不必紧张 |
| [01:26] | What’s going on? | 出什么事了 |
| [01:27] | Well, this is the weirdest little story. | 这算是最离奇的故事了 |
| [01:30] | Uh, but ten years ago, | 十年前 |
| [01:32] | I was having a particularly bad day. | 我经历了相当糟糕的一天 |
| [01:34] | You know, the kind of day that can only be cured | 糟到只能靠酒精和粉丝信 |
| [01:36] | with drinking and fan mail. | 来排解苦闷 |
| [01:38] | And I happened upon this eloquently-written letter | 我碰巧读到一封出自一位绅士手笔 |
| [01:41] | from a gentleman in a correctional facility. | 写得情真意切 从监狱寄来的信 |
| [01:43] | Well, he was such an earnest fan, | 他是如此诚挚的一位粉丝 |
| [01:45] | I had to write him back. | 我必须得回信 |
| [01:47] | You wrote to a prisoner? | 你给囚犯写信 |
| [01:48] | Well, Gary prefers the term “incarcerated American.” | 加里更喜欢”被囚禁的美国人”这个称呼 |
| [01:54] | But of course, I wasn’t reckless enough to use my own name. | 当然 我不会鲁莽到用我自己的名字 |
| [01:57] | What name did you use? | 你用了什么名字 |
| [01:58] | Well, this is the second little wrinkle in the story | 这是故事里第二个小高潮 |
| [02:00] | which, Joy, I think you are gonna find particularly funny. | 乔依 我认为你会觉得很好笑 |
| [02:03] | You used my name? | 你用了我的名字 |
| [02:05] | I pretended you were my assistant. | 我假装你是我的助理 |
| [02:07] | Why would you do that? | 你为什么要那么做 |
| [02:08] | Joy would make a terrible assistant. | 乔依肯定是极其糟糕的助理 |
| [02:12] | Well, I figured it was safe. | 我认为这很安全 |
| [02:14] | I mean, there wasn’t a chance they were gonna parole this guy | 我是说 他根本没机会得到假释 |
| [02:16] | on account of his… | 考虑到他的… |
| [02:18] | violent history. | 暴力史 |
| [02:20] | Violent…What violent history? | 暴力 什么暴力史 |
| [02:22] | Oh, something about body parts and… chopping. | 残肢 分尸什么的 |
| [02:26] | Um, I kind of skimmed over the segments | 没有提及我的地方 |
| [02:28] | that weren’t about me, you know. | 都被我忽略了 |
| [02:30] | So this violent criminal thinks I’m his pen pal? | 这个暴力的罪犯 认为我是他的笔友 |
| [02:33] | No, no, no. | 不不不 |
| [02:34] | His pen lover. | “信交”女友 |
| [02:37] | But you broke it off after he proposed. | 但在他求婚之后 你跟他分手了 |
| [02:39] | And then he got very angry and, you know, | 之后他很生气 |
| [02:41] | started saying, “oh, if I ever get out of here, | 说什么 “有朝一日我出狱了 |
| [02:43] | I’m gonna come get you, and…” | 不会放过你…” |
| [02:46] | So why are we hearing this story now, | 你为什么现在告诉我们这件事 |
| [02:47] | instead of never… Oh, my god! | 而不是一直瞒下去 天啊 |
| [02:49] | He escaped, didn’t he? | 他越狱了 是吗 |
| [02:50] | No, no, it’s nothing like that. | 不是啦 怎么会 |
| [02:53] | He was just paroled yesterday. | 昨天他获得假释出狱了 |
| [02:56] | Look, I never, ever thought that anything like this would happen. | 听着 我从没想到这种事会发生 |
| [02:59] | Joy, I am so, so, so sorry. | 乔依 我很是抱歉 |
| [03:02] | We’ll deal with us later. | 我们的恩怨先放一放 |
| [03:03] | Right now, we have to figure out what do to about | 现在 我们得想办法对付这个 |
| [03:05] | an ex-con who chops up bodies and is coming here to get me. | 有分尸前科 要来把我大卸八块的罪犯 |
| [03:09] | How are we gonna recognize him? | 我们怎么认出他 |
| [03:10] | I mean, do you know what he looks like? | 你知道他长什么样子吗 |
| [03:11] | Well, I never asked for a photo. | 我没要过照片 |
| [03:12] | I didn’t want him to think that Joy was shallow. | 我不想让他认为乔依很肤浅 |
| [03:17] | Does he know what I look like? | 他知道我长什么样吗 |
| [03:19] | Well, I might have sent him that picture of you | 我把我们去开曼群岛时 |
| [03:21] | from our trip to Grand Cayman. | 你的那张照片寄给他了 |
| [03:22] | You mean the one in the white bikini | 你是说穿着一碰水 |
| [03:24] | that showed everything when it got wet? | 就各种走光的白色比基尼那张 |
| [03:26] | You should be flattered. | 你应该感到高兴 |
| [03:27] | It was a big hit with the whole cell block. | 那张照片在监狱大受欢迎 |
| [03:33] | Gary was having a very tough week. | 加里那周过得很糟糕 |
| [03:36] | You know, I always thought my son stole that picture, | 我一直以为是我儿子偷了那张照片 |
| [03:37] | so this, actually, it’s quite a relief. | 所以呢 这真是让人松一口气 |
| [03:39] | Not… not a relief right now, | 不是说现在放松 |
| [03:41] | but… but for another time. | 换个时间再放松 |
| [03:47] | Hello? | 喂 |
| [03:49] | Yes, Joy’s here. | 是的 乔依在 |
| [03:50] | Who’s calling? | 你是谁 |
| [03:54] | He hung up. | 他挂了 |
| [03:56] | Oh, my god, it’s him! | 老天 是他 |
| [03:59] | Even more than usual, I’m glad I’m not Joy right now. | 我比平常更庆幸我不是乔依 |
| [04:19] | Victoria! I thought I heard a noise. | 维多利亚 我就觉得我听到了动静 |
| [04:22] | I almost maced you. | 我差点喷了你 |
| [04:24] | That’s sunscreen. | 那是防晒喷雾 |
| [04:27] | Oh, well, I thought it was my pepper spray. | 我以为是胡椒喷雾 |
| [04:28] | What did you think that was? | 你以为那是什么 |
| [04:30] | I knew it was a magnifying mirror. | 我知道这是放大镜 |
| [04:32] | Do you know anything scarier? | 还有比这更吓人的东西吗 |
| [04:33] | Wait, don’t point that thing at me. | 别拿它对着我 |
| [04:37] | What’s going on? Is everybody all right? | 出什么事了 大家都还好吗 |
| [04:42] | Are you hunting wabbits? | 你在狩猎小白兔吗 |
| [04:45] | It’s a Polish pellet gun. | 这是波兰散弹枪 |
| [04:47] | What, does it shoot backwards? | 怎么 这玩意向后发射吗 |
| [04:51] | Are you really gonna make Polish jokes | 你真的想在这个时候开玩笑吗 |
| [04:54] | when I’m holding a gun? | 我可是握着一把枪唉 |
| [04:57] | Look, I have an alarm guy coming in the morning. | 听着 我找了警报器公司的人明早来 |
| [05:00] | We do not need any guns. | 我们不需要枪 |
| [05:05] | Oh, my… | 我的天 |
| [05:09] | My… my name is Owen. | 我…我叫欧文 |
| [05:10] | I’m looking for my birth mother. | 我是来找亲生母亲的 |
| [05:12] | Which one of you is Joy Scroggs? | 你们谁是乔依·斯克罗格 |
| [05:16] | Her. | 她 |
| [05:21] | Elka’s calling 911, and I brought some alcohol. | 爱尔卡叫了救护车 我拿了酒来 |
| [05:24] | Oh, right, to sterilize his wounds? | 对哦 给伤口消毒 |
| [05:27] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [05:31] | Thank god it’s just buckshot in the leg. | 还好只是腿部中了铅弹 |
| [05:33] | He doesn’t seem that badly hurt. | 他好像伤得不是很重 |
| [05:35] | Then why did he faint? | 那他怎么晕过去了 |
| [05:36] | All the Scroggs men faint at the sight of blood. | 斯克罗格家男丁都是见血就晕 |
| [05:38] | One rare steak can ruin a dinner party. | 一块带血牛排就能毁了一顿晚宴 |
| [05:41] | He really is mine. | 他是我的孩子无疑了 |
| [05:42] | But when he wakes up, he’s gonna think he’s mine. | 可他醒来会认为我是他妈 |
| [05:44] | Why did you say I was you? | 你为什么说我是你 |
| [05:46] | Obviously, Joy’s in shock, | 显然 乔依吓傻了 |
| [05:47] | or she would have chosen the superior actress for the role. | 不然她会选择戏骨来演绎这个角色 |
| [05:52] | I panicked. Since I gave him up for adoption, | 我慌了 自从把他送到领养机构 |
| [05:54] | I’ve dreamed of what our reunion would be | 我就憧憬着重逢会是什么样子 |
| [05:56] | like a million different ways, | 想到了无数情景 |
| [05:57] | none of which involved me shooting him. | 任何一个都不包括射伤他 |
| [06:00] | Please just say you’re me for a little while | 求你了 假扮我一会儿 |
| [06:02] | until I can figure out how to explain all this. | 直到我想好怎么解释这一切 |
| [06:05] | The ambulance is on the way. How’s he doing? | 救护车一会儿就到 他怎么样 |
| [06:08] | He’s waking up. | 他醒了 |
| [06:08] | I don’t know how to do a British accent. | 我不知道怎么学英国口音 |
| [06:10] | Just talk like I do. | 学我就行 |
| [06:11] | Oh, this is a bad idea. | 烂主意 |
| [06:17] | ‘Ello. | 合啰 |
| [06:24] | ‘Ow’s me ol’ son? | 吾之乖仔咋样鸟 |
| [06:27] | Called it. | 我就说嘛 |
| [06:29] | Joy? | 乔依 |
| [06:30] | Blimey! | 天啦噜 |
| [06:33] | I wish I’d-a known you were comin’. | 我要是知晓你要来就好鸟 |
| [06:35] | I’d-a put on a spot o’ tea. | 我肯定会给你泡壶茶滴 |
| [06:39] | I call elevators “lifts.” | 俺管电梯叫升降机 |
| [06:45] | What your mom is trying to say | 你妈妈用含蓄的英国说法 |
| [06:48] | in her reserved English way is, | 想要表达的是 |
| [06:50] | “gosh darn it, we’re happy you’re here.” | “哎呦喂 我们好开心你来了” |
| [06:54] | Then why did you shoot me? | 那你为何开枪打我 |
| [06:56] | Perhaps I can be of some assistance. | 或许偶可以帮忙之 |
| [07:02] | We were under the impression that you were an ex-convict. | 偶们误以为你是一名前科犯 |
| [07:06] | Terribly sorry. | 灰常抱歉 |
| [07:07] | Who are you? | 你是谁 |
| [07:08] | I’m Lady Winchester. | 俺是温彻斯特夫人 |
| [07:13] | She’s me mum. | 她是我滴妈咪 |
| [07:16] | So you’re my grandmother? | 那你是我外婆咯 |
| [07:18] | No, no, no. No, I am your step-grandmother. | 不不 我是你滴继外婆 |
| [07:21] | I am your grandfather’s second wife. | 我是你外公滴第二任老婆 |
| [07:23] | Actually younger than Joy. | 事实上比乔依还年轻 |
| [07:25] | Which is quite a scandal, really. | 真滴是丑闻一桩 |
| [07:29] | You really should have called your mother. | 你应该事先打电话告知你母亲一声的 |
| [07:31] | So she could have prepared for your arrival. | 那样她也好为你的到来做好准备 |
| [07:34] | I did call, I just got nervous and I hung up. | 我打了 我一紧张就挂了 |
| [07:42] | Well, no worries. | 无需忧心 |
| [07:44] | The important thing is, | 重要滴是 |
| [07:46] | you should consider yourself at ‘ome. | 你要把这里当成自己滴鸭[的家] |
| [07:51] | Don’t drop your H’s, darling. | 不要省略H音 亲爱滴 |
| [07:54] | Oh, why can’t the English learn to speak. | 英国银就不能学着好好说话吗 |
| [07:57] | You can’t tell me what to say. | 轮不到你教训我 |
| [07:58] | – You’re not me real mum. – Don’t you be impertinent. | -你又不是我亲妈 -别这么无礼 |
| [08:00] | This is ridiculous. Both of you stop it. | 太扯了 你们别闹了 |
| [08:04] | I’m Joy. | 我才是乔依 |
| [08:06] | I’m your mother. | 我是你母亲 |
| [08:07] | What? Wait, you’re my mother? | 什么 等等 你是我母亲 |
| [08:11] | Why did you pretend that you weren’t? | 你刚刚为什么假装你不是 |
| [08:13] | I panicked. | 我慌了 |
| [08:15] | And who shot me? | 谁开枪打的我 |
| [08:17] | That was me too. | 也是我 |
| [08:18] | But it was an accident. | 但那是意外 |
| [08:20] | She’s right. Technically, the couch shot you. | 对 确切地说 是沙发射伤了你 |
| [08:22] | Yeah, maybe we should just start at the beginning. | 我们还是从头说起吧 |
| [08:24] | You see, I was writing love notes to a prisoner, as your mother. | 我呢 假装成你母亲给囚犯写情书 |
| [08:26] | Are you all insane? | 你们都是疯子吗 |
| [08:29] | Oh, good! The paramedics are here. | 太好了 救护车来了 |
| [08:30] | I’ll follow you in my car. | 我开我的车跟着你 |
| [08:32] | And trust me, things here aren’t as crazy as they seem. | 相信我 事实没有你眼见的这么疯狂 |
| [08:35] | I brought a wee bag of ice for the wee ‘un’s leg. | 俺拿了一袋冰给他糊腿[敷腿] |
| [08:41] | What? They’re not doing that anymore? | 怎么 现在不用装英式口音了吗 |
| [08:48] | I just got off the phone with Joy. | 我刚跟乔依通过电话 |
| [08:50] | She’s still waiting to see Owen, | 她还在等着见欧文 |
| [08:51] | but the doctor says he’s resting comfortably. | 但是医生说他已无大碍 |
| [08:53] | That’s good. I have some good news too. | 那就好 我也有好消息 |
| [08:56] | It’s against the law for parolees | 假释犯不得离开 |
| [08:57] | to leave the state they were incarcerated in. | 服刑的那个州 |
| [08:59] | So Gary can’t leave Pennsylvania. | 所以加里不能离开宾州 |
| [09:01] | So he’s far? Near? | 他离这儿远还是近 |
| [09:06] | It’s the state to our right. | 宾州就在我们右边啊 |
| [09:08] | Stage right? | 舞台方向的右边吗 |
| [09:11] | Oh, I bet that’s the alarm guy. | 估计是警报器公司的人 |
| [09:12] | Joy said he’d be by around 11:00. | 乔依说他会在11点左右来 |
| [09:16] | Hi. Here to see Joy Scroggs. | 你好 我是来找乔依·斯克罗格的 |
| [09:18] | Oh, you must be from the alarm company. | 你一定是警报器公司的人吧 |
| [09:21] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [09:22] | May I come in? | 我能进来吗 |
| [09:23] | Well, Joy’s not here, but we live here too. | 乔依不在 但是我们也住这里 |
| [09:25] | And I guess we should still get that alarm system, right? | 警报器系统是肯定要装的 对吧 |
| [09:28] | Yeah, I think so. | 是的 没错 |
| [09:29] | Can I get you something to drink while you check out the house? | 你先看看安装环境 我给你准备饮料 |
| [09:31] | Great, thanks. | 好的 谢谢 |
| [09:34] | Well, I see you staring, | 我看见你在盯着看 |
| [09:35] | and, yes, I am television’s Victoria Chase. | 没错 我就是电视明星维多利亚·蔡斯 |
| [09:38] | Hey, don’t sell your film work short. | 嘿 别谦虚 你的电影也很赞 |
| [09:40] | You were great as the outraged white congresswoman | 你在《疯婆子到华盛顿》中演的那个暴怒的 |
| [09:42] | in “Madea goes to Washington”. | 国会女议员非常棒 |
| [09:46] | “Turn that music down! | “音乐调小点 |
| [09:47] | We’re trying to filibuster!” | 我们正在长篇大论阻碍议案通过” |
| [09:54] | “Hey, this is Reggie with the alarm company. | “你好 我是雷吉 报警器公司的 |
| [09:56] | I’m not gonna make it today, | 我今天来不了了 |
| [09:57] | so please call to reschedule. Thanks.” | 请再和我联系约时间 谢谢” |
| [10:01] | Oh, my god. | 天呐 |
| [10:02] | And then I would have said, | 之后我本来会说 |
| [10:04] | “oh, it’s just an honor being nominated | “能跟这些才华横溢的女演员 |
| [10:06] | with all these talented women.” | 一同提名就已是莫大荣幸了” |
| [10:08] | I can’t tell you how mad I am that you never got to make your speech. | 你没能发表获奖感言 真是把我气死了 |
| [10:11] | If I could kidnap everyone who was in the audience that night | 如果我能把那晚的观众都绑架来 |
| [10:13] | and make them listen to it, I would. | 听你的感言的话 我会的 |
| [10:17] | That is so sweet. | 你可真贴心 |
| [10:20] | Victoria. | 维多利亚 |
| [10:21] | Can I see you in the kitchen, please? | 你能来下厨房吗 |
| [10:22] | I need some help with the lemonade. | 做柠檬汁需要你帮忙 |
| [10:23] | Well, we’re kind of in the middle of something here. | 我们正聊得起兴呢 |
| [10:26] | How hard is it to make lemonade? | 做柠檬汁有多难 |
| [10:27] | No, I mean, really… How hard is it? | 不 我是说 到底有多难 |
| [10:29] | I seriously have no idea. | 我完全不知道 |
| [10:36] | If I am any judge of character, that guy is a winner. | 如果我看人准的话 那人一定是最棒的 |
| [10:40] | That’s not the alarm guy. | 他不是报警器公司的人 |
| [10:41] | I think that’s Gary… crazed ex-con Gary. | 我认为那是加里 疯狂的前科犯加里 |
| [10:44] | No, it can’t be. | 不 不可能 |
| [10:45] | No, he’s not allowed to leave Portland. | 他不能离开波特兰的[俄勒冈州] |
| [10:48] | Pennsylvania. | 宾夕法尼亚州 |
| [10:52] | Whose creepy van is parked out front? | 外面停着的那辆吓人的货车是谁的 |
| [10:54] | That’s the convict’s. We gotta run. | 是那个罪犯的 我们赶紧跑吧 |
| [10:57] | Not a good idea. | 那可不是好主意 |
| [11:04] | Paging Dr. Bector. | 呼叫贝克特医生 |
| [11:06] | Paging Dr. Bector, please. | 请贝克特医生听到呼叫后来一趟 |
| [11:12] | I’m sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [11:14] | Have you been here staring at me all night? | 你就这样盯着我一整晚吗 |
| [11:16] | Not all night. | 不是一整晚 |
| [11:17] | I went down to the maternity ward | 我有去产科那边 |
| [11:18] | and stared at the babies until security asked me to leave. | 盯宝宝来着 直到保安强迫我离开 |
| [11:23] | Anyway, great news. | 总之呢 好消息 |
| [11:25] | You’re buckshot free. | 铅弹都取出来了 |
| [11:26] | So I have the same amount of buckshot | 也就是说我身体里的铅弹数 |
| [11:28] | as I had before I met you. | 跟见到你之前一样 |
| [11:30] | You’ll probably laugh about that someday. | 说不定以后想起你会哈哈一笑呢 |
| [11:32] | I mean, if you want. | 如果你想的话 |
| [11:34] | If things work out. | 如果我们合得来 |
| [11:35] | We could laugh about it now, if you wish, | 如果你愿意 现在就可以一起笑 |
| [11:37] | or we could just talk… I’ve got all day. | 聊天也行啊 我各种闲 |
| [11:39] | About that, um… | 关于这个 |
| [11:42] | You know that I had cold feet about coming to see you. | 你知道我对于来见你有所犹豫 |
| [11:45] | And then I started picturing what this moment might be like. | 然后我开始想象见面时是什么样子 |
| [11:47] | And what you might be like, and… | 你会是什么样子 |
| [11:49] | And how we might have this life-changing, | 想象我们会有那种改变一切的 |
| [11:51] | cosmic connection. | 冥冥之中的联系 |
| [11:53] | So a couple days ago, I told myself, | 几天前 我告诉自己 |
| [11:54] | just get on a plane and do it. | 上飞机 别多想 |
| [11:56] | What’s the worst that could happen? | 最糟又会怎样呢 |
| [12:00] | This wasn’t how I pictured our first meeting either. | 我想象的第一次见面也不是这样 |
| [12:03] | I mean, you’re the closest person in the world to me, biologically. | 从血缘上来说 你是这世上跟我最亲近的人 |
| [12:07] | But we’re complete strangers. | 但我们却是陌生人 |
| [12:09] | It’s just all so overwhelming. | 这一切都让人不知所措 |
| [12:12] | Maybe this was a mistake. | 也许这是个错误 |
| [12:14] | I mean, you’re uncomfortable, I’m uncomfortable. | 见面让你和我都不自在 |
| [12:16] | But that’s the exact, same relationship I have with my mother! | 但是我和我母亲之间的关系也是这样啊 |
| [12:20] | We can build on this. | 我们可以增进感情的 |
| [12:22] | Look, you seem like a really nice woman. | 听我说 你看起来挺不错的 |
| [12:25] | But I think that we should say we met, | 但是我们见过面了 |
| [12:28] | mystery solved, | 谜团解开 |
| [12:29] | and get back to our regular lives. | 还是回到各自正常的生活吧 |
| [12:32] | Or… my regular life | 或者说 我的正常生活 |
| [12:34] | and whatever that was going on over at your house. | 以及你家那怪异的疯狂生活 |
| [12:38] | So… this is good-bye. | 那 现在就说再见吗 |
| [12:41] | I think it’s for the best. | 这是为了大家好 |
| [12:47] | So where’s Joy? | 乔依在哪 |
| [12:48] | I don’t know. Please don’t kill us. | 我不知道 求你别杀我们 |
| [12:51] | I’m not gonna kill anybody. What gave you that idea? | 我不会杀人 你为什么会这么想 |
| [12:53] | Well, the reason you went to prison. | 你入狱的原因啊 |
| [12:55] | Body parts. | 残肢 |
| [12:57] | Auto body parts. | 是汽车零件 |
| [12:59] | I ran a ring of chop chops. | 我开了个地下拆车场 |
| [13:00] | I wrote that in my first fan letter to you. | 在第一封粉丝信中 我就告诉你了 |
| [13:02] | Victoria doesn’t read anything that’s not about her. | 跟维多利亚无关的内容 她都不会看的 |
| [13:04] | I really don’t. | 我真不看 |
| [13:06] | Look, I’ve done a little time myself. | 听着 我也蹲过监狱 |
| [13:10] | So one con to another, | 我们交交心 |
| [13:12] | forget Joy. | 忘记乔依吧 |
| [13:14] | Why don’t you just go to a strip club, like a real parolee? | 去脱衣舞俱乐部吧 有点假释犯的样子 |
| [13:19] | That’s an awesome idea. I’ll give you all my singles. | 好主意 我把所有的一块纸币都给你 |
| [13:21] | You can make it rain. | 你可以一把一把地撒 |
| [13:24] | I been waiting for this moment for too long. | 这一刻我等得太久了 |
| [13:27] | I’m gonna make her sorry she ruined my life. | 我要让她为毁了我的生活而后悔 |
| [13:29] | She didn’t ruin your life. I did. | 她没有毁了你的生活 是我 |
| [13:32] | I’m the one who wrote all those letters. | 给你写信的人是我 |
| [13:34] | I just used her name and picture, | 我用了她的名字和照片 |
| [13:36] | because I’m a celebrity, | 因为我是明星 |
| [13:37] | and celebrities… can’t be associated with prisoners, | 而明星不能跟罪犯联系在一起 |
| [13:40] | unless they’re researching a role. | 除非是在研究角色 |
| [13:42] | And I never get those parts. | 我没演过那么有深度的角色 |
| [13:44] | Too glamorous. | 长得太美局限了呀 |
| [13:47] | You wrote all the letters? | 信都是你写的 |
| [13:49] | Yes, you see, I’m the one you’re madly in love with. | 是的 你深深爱上的人是我 |
| [13:51] | No, you’re not. | 不 不是你 |
| [13:53] | I fell in love with Joy, the girl from the picture. | 我爱的是乔依 照片上那个女人 |
| [13:55] | You’re not even my type. | 你都不是我喜欢的型 |
| [13:56] | Well, wait a minute! We’re the same type… | 等等 我们是一个型 |
| [13:58] | Gorgeous, willowy brunettes. | 美丽 纤瘦的褐发女郎 |
| [13:59] | And I wrote all those beautiful letters. | 那些美丽的文字都是我写的 |
| [14:02] | – Uh, you’re not trying to win him over. – Oh, yeah. | -你的任务不是让他爱上你 -哦对 |
| [14:10] | Oh, it’ll be all right. | 会没事的 |
| [14:12] | You’ll find someone new. | 你会找到喜欢的人的 |
| [14:13] | The strip club is open till 4:00. | 脱衣舞俱乐部4点才关门呢 |
| [14:18] | What’s going on here? | 这是怎么回事 |
| [14:19] | Oh, Joy, this is Gary. | 乔依 他是加里 |
| [14:22] | Oh, my god, it’s you! | 天啊 是你 |
| [14:23] | But it’s not you. | 但又不是你 |
| [14:25] | This is the Gary | 这就是那位 |
| [14:26] | that we were afraid was gonna kill me? | 我们担惊受怕会杀死我的加里 |
| [14:29] | Is he crying? | 他在哭吗 |
| [14:30] | Like Brett Favre retiring for the tenth time. | 跟橄榄球明星布瑞特·法夫第十次退役时一样 |
| [14:38] | All these years, I’ve been imagining | 这么多年 我都憧憬着 |
| [14:39] | how I was finally gonna meet you and win you back. | 终于见到你 赢回你的心 |
| [14:41] | Or, you know, make you pay. | 或是 让你付出代价 |
| [14:44] | This is not how I pictured it at all. | 这跟我想象的完全不一样 |
| [14:46] | Why does everything have to be the way people bloody picture it? | 为什么任何事 都他娘的要跟想象的一样 |
| [14:49] | Life doesn’t work that way! | 生活不是那样的 |
| [14:51] | Boy, you got a temper on you. | 天啊 你脾气不小呀 |
| [14:54] | You dodged a bullet. | 跟她没成 算你走运 |
| [14:58] | I’ve got to get back to the hospital. | 我得回医院 |
| [15:02] | Gary, you should probably go too. | 加里 你也该走了 |
| [15:04] | Your parole officer’s probably worried sick. | 你的假释官可能都担心死了 |
| [15:06] | You’re right. No reason to stay here. | 是啊 没必要留在这了 |
| [15:08] | Wait, Gary… | 等等 加里 |
| [15:11] | I can’t help but feel responsible | 对于今天发生的事 |
| [15:13] | for what’s happened here today. | 我感觉都是因我而起 |
| [15:15] | So any time you’re feeling lonely, please feel free to call this number. | 任何时候你感觉孤独 大可打给这个号码 |
| [15:20] | Susan Lucci? | 苏珊·露琪 |
| [15:26] | Tell her I said hi. | 代我向她问好 |
| [15:32] | So maybe this wasn’t what either one of us expected. | 这可能跟我们想象的不太一样 |
| [15:34] | How could it be? | 怎会一样呢 |
| [15:35] | This awkward and painful and messy, | 如此尴尬 痛苦 一塌糊涂 |
| [15:38] | and no one pictures messy. | 谁会期待一塌糊涂 |
| [15:40] | But sometimes, if you’re willing to work through the messy, | 但有时 经受住一塌糊涂的风雨 |
| [15:42] | you end up getting to something good. | 就能见到绚丽的彩虹 |
| [15:46] | That was it. The whole speech. | 没了 发言完毕 |
| [15:48] | Maybe I said it too fast. | 也许我说得太快了 |
| [15:50] | The, “hi, Owen, we have to talk” was implied. | “嗨 欧文 我们得谈谈”暗含在其中了 |
| [15:54] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [15:57] | Okay is promising. | “好吧”听着有戏 |
| [16:00] | All right. | 好 |
| [16:01] | Let’s get messy. | 那就彻底一塌糊涂吧 |
| [16:09] | Who’s my dad? | 我爸爸是谁 |
| [16:12] | A charming, lying, handsome rat | 魅力四射 英俊潇洒 没句真话的混蛋 |
| [16:15] | who no girl could resist. | 女孩们对他没有抵抗力 |
| [16:18] | My turn. | 该我了 |
| [16:20] | Are you married? | 你结婚了吗 |
| [16:21] | Divorced. | 离婚了 |
| [16:22] | – Already? – Big mess. | -这就离了 -一塌大糊涂 |
| [16:24] | Sorry. | 真遗憾 |
| [16:26] | Kids? | 有孩子吗 |
| [16:27] | You’re not a grandmother. | 你没当奶奶 |
| [16:28] | Oh, thank god. | 谢天谢地 |
| [16:29] | Oh, I mean, someday when I’m ready. | 我是说得等我准备好 |
| [16:32] | I mean, when you’re ready. | 我是说等你准备好 |
| [16:35] | Is there any baldness in the family? | 我们家有脱发的先例吗 |
| [16:37] | No. Not among the men. | 没有 男丁没有 |
| [16:40] | So good for you, bad for me. | 对你是好消息 对我就很糟了 |
| [16:45] | What do you do? | 你是做什么工作的 |
| [16:46] | I teach gun safety. | 我教枪械使用安全 |
| [16:51] | I’m kidding. | 开玩笑的 |
| [16:52] | I’m an actuary. | 我是保险精算师 |
| [16:53] | Oh, wow, an actuary. | 了不起 保险精算啊 |
| [16:56] | I have no idea what that is. | 我完全不知道是什么 |
| [16:58] | It’s an insurance thing. | 跟保险有关 |
| [17:00] | Uh, how ’bout you? | 你呢 |
| [17:01] | Oh, I convince celebrities | 我说服名人 |
| [17:03] | that they’re plucking their eyebrows all wrong, | 他们的眉毛修得不对 |
| [17:05] | and they pay me a fortune to do it right. | 他们付我一大笔钱给他们弄 |
| [17:07] | – Well, how are my brows? – Oh, they’re fine. | -我的眉毛如何 -还好啦 |
| [17:09] | You’re grooming them all wrong. | 不过你梳理的不对 |
| [17:10] | – Really? – No. See how easy it is? | -真的吗 -没有啦 知道这钱多好赚了吧 |
| [17:15] | Okay. Here comes the… the big one. | 好吧 到了最重要的部分 |
| [17:22] | Why did you give me up? | 你当初为何把我送去领养 |
| [17:28] | For this moment… | 就为了这一刻 |
| [17:30] | That someday, I would meet you again. | 某天 我会再次见到你 |
| [17:34] | And you would be well-raised and healthy | 看到你被悉心栽培 健健康康 |
| [17:36] | and happy. | 开心快乐 |
| [17:39] | And you might be my friend. | 你可能愿意做我的朋友 |
| [17:44] | I’d like that. | 我希望这样 |
| [17:56] | Also, that you might take care of me in my old age. | 还有 在我老的时候照顾我 |
| [18:01] | We’ll see. | 再说吧 |
| [18:06] | Well, I, for one, truly enjoyed bible stories told through pets. | 我呢 非常喜欢通过宠物来讲圣经故事 |
| [18:09] | Although I was a little confused about Noah’s ark. | 但是诺亚方舟那个我有点困惑 |
| [18:11] | I mean, Noah was a dog, but he had dogs. | 诺亚是条狗 他还养了狗 |
| [18:16] | Oh, wait a minute. | 等等 |
| [18:16] | Mickey Mouse had Pluto as a pet, | 米老鼠有布鲁托做宠物 |
| [18:19] | but Goofy as a friend. So, yeah, makes sense. | 但高飞是他的朋友 没错 搞懂了 |
| [18:23] | Why did every bird in that bloody show pick me to crap on? | 为什么参演这出烂秀的鸟都拉屎在我身上 |
| [18:26] | I don’t think we should question the wisdom of the animals. | 我认为我们不应该质疑动物的智慧 |
| [18:31] | Well, I am just so proud of Chance, our little star. | 我真为吉祥骄傲 小明星哦 |
| [18:34] | Oh, stop trying to make me feel better. | 你就别安抚我了 |
| [18:36] | Oh, come on. He stole the show. | 得了 它超级抢镜的 |
| [18:38] | He stole the baby Jesus. | 它把婴儿耶稣抢走了 |
| [18:45] | 圣经故事中的耶稣神迹 将水变酒 | |
| [18:45] | Come on, let’s go inside and turn some water into wine. | 走吧 进屋将水变成美酒 |
| [18:48] | Hey, this is the first time we’re coming home to our new alarm system. | 这是装了报警器后 我们第一次进家门 |
| [18:51] | Front door open. | 前门打开 |
| [18:53] | Hurry, you have 20 seconds to put in the code. | 快点 你有20秒钟输入密码 |
| [18:55] | I forgot what we agreed on. Was it one of my kids’ birthdays? | 我忘了商量好的密码 是我孩子的生日吗 |
| [18:57] | Uh, no, I think it was the year I was born. | 不是说好用我的出生年份吗 |
| [18:59] | Can’t be… the code has to be four numbers. | 不可能 密码必须是四位数 |
| [19:03] | Ten seconds to alarm. | 十秒后警报响起 |
| [19:05] | Oh, oh, maybe it’s my goal weight! | 或许是我的理想体重 |
| [19:06] | But is it my dream goal weight or my realistic goal weight? | 是梦想的理想体重 还是现实中的理想体重 |
| [19:09] | Your goal weight has four numbers in it? | 你的理想体重有四位数吗 |
| [19:11] | There’s a decimal point involved. | 有小数点嘛 |
| [19:13] | I remember! It was the year I was born. | 我想起来了 是我的出生年份 |
| [19:16] | Code declined. | 密码错误 |
| [19:18] | You lied about your age to the alarm? | 你对报警器也要隐瞒真实年龄吗 |
| [19:20] | Well, I felt it was judging me. | 我觉得它在对我翻白眼 |
| [19:22] | All right, take 10 years off. No, 12. | 去掉10年 不对 12年 |
| [19:25] | I was feeling very vulnerable that day. | 那天人家感觉好脆弱 |
| [19:28] | Thank you, Miss Chase. | 谢谢 蔡斯小姐 |
| [19:29] | You look gorgeous. | 你美极了 |
| [19:33] | It costs a little extra, | 多给了点钱 |
| [19:34] | but it makes me feel more secure. | 但让我更有安全感 |