| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience. | 《燃情克利夫兰》是在摄影棚观众前现场录制的 |
| [00:05] | Bless me father, for I have sinned. | 我有罪 求神父宽恕我 |
| [00:07] | It’s been three months since my last confession. | 离我上一次忏悔已有3个月之久 |
| [00:09] | And what is your sin, my child? | 你犯了什么罪呢 我的孩子 |
| [00:11] | Well, I–I lied. | 我撒了谎 |
| [00:12] | I told my friend Joy | 我骗了我的朋友乔依 |
| [00:13] | that I had a great guy to fix her up with, | 说我帮她找到了一个好男人 |
| [00:15] | but, really, I have no one. | 可其实我根本没找到 |
| [00:16] | Well, you should be honest with her. | 你应该对她老实坦白这件事 |
| [00:17] | If she’s truly a friend, she’ll forgive you. | 如果她是你的真朋友 她会原谅你的 |
| [00:20] | No, father, you don’t understand. | 不 神父 你不明白 |
| [00:22] | Instead of celebrating our birthdays, | 我们每年不会庆祝真正的生日 |
| [00:23] | we have this annual thing called birth dates, | 而是举办”生日约会”活动 |
| [00:26] | where my friends and I set each other up. | 帮彼此物色约会对象 |
| [00:27] | It’s kind of a tradition for us. | 这已成为我们之间的传统了 |
| [00:30] | Well, that sounds enjoyable. | 听起来挺好玩的 |
| [00:32] | Yeah, it does. | 听起来是不错 |
| [00:33] | But it’s not. | 可其实不好玩 |
| [00:34] | The dates are usually disasters. | 通常每次约会都是一场灾难 |
| [00:36] | Between the conjoined twins, the guy with breasts, | 什么连体双胞胎啊 大胸男啊 |
| [00:38] | and the man I thought was Jesus. | 还有个人长得跟耶稣一个样呢 |
| [00:42] | I–I mean, that– that one was great. | 我是说 那个男人可优质了呢 |
| [00:45] | Well, a lot of people experience sadness on their birthdays. | 很多人的生日都过得挺悲催的 |
| [00:49] | I’ve noticed that the older nuns | 我就注意到好多老修女 |
| [00:51] | often experience a certain melancholy | 在我们带她们去廉价餐厅 |
| [00:53] | when we take them to Arby’s on their special day. | 庆祝生日时都闷闷不乐的 |
| [00:57] | See, I don’t want my friend to feel like the nuns at Arby’s. | 我不想让我朋友和去廉价餐厅的修女一样悲惨 |
| [01:00] | But she’s not making this easy. | 可她自己也太挑剔了 |
| [01:02] | She’s been very specific about not wanting anyone with baggage | 她特别要求对方不能有过去的包袱 |
| [01:05] | or– or weird stuff in their past. | 或者 也不能经历过什么怪事 |
| [01:09] | Say, listen, uh… | 那个 我说 |
| [01:10] | Do you happen to have a picture of her? | 你带你朋友的照片了吗 |
| [01:14] | You set me up with a priest? | 你帮我找了一个神父吗 |
| [01:16] | No, no. No, no, no. | 不 不是的 |
| [01:17] | He’s giving up the priesthood. | 他正准备放弃神职 |
| [01:19] | He no longer believes it’s his calling. | 他不再相信那是他的使命了 |
| [01:20] | So…God’s loss is your gain. | 神之所失 你之所得啊 |
| [01:24] | Wow, so his first date ever will be with Joy? | 所以乔依是他的首次约会了 |
| [01:29] | Shouldn’t he go on one of the kiddie rides first? | 他不是该先去坐坐儿童摇摇车吗 |
| [01:36] | You’re gonna love him. | 你会喜欢他的 |
| [01:37] | He’s a really great guy. | 他真的是个好人 |
| [01:38] | He puts the communion wafer on your tongue with such assurance. | 他会神定气若地把圣饼放在你的舌头上 |
| [01:42] | So strong, yet so tender. | 强壮有力 却也温柔似水 |
| [01:46] | I think you might have to be Catholic for that to be hot. | 我想只有天主教徒才会觉得这很性感吧 |
| [01:50] | Although…with no prior romantic experience, | 不过 如果他完全没有恋爱的经验 |
| [01:53] | he’s gonna need someone to help him… | 那么他一定需要有人帮助了 |
| [01:55] | Guide him, mold him into exactly what she wants. | 指引他 塑造他 打造成女人希望的样子 |
| [02:00] | It’s almost too easy. | 这也太简单了 |
| [02:02] | And how’s the hunt for my date going? | 我的约会对象找得如何啊 |
| [02:04] | Oh, trust me, Victoria, | 相信我 维多利亚 |
| [02:05] | I have found the perfect person for you. | 我帮你挑到了一个完美对象 |
| [02:07] | Physically perfect, right? | 是外形完美的那种 对吧 |
| [02:08] | Not that “Beautiful on the inside” nonsense. | 心灵美什么的我才不要呢 |
| [02:12] | I promise, you’re gonna be thrilled. | 我保证你会高兴死的 |
| [02:14] | I better be. | 最好如此 |
| [02:16] | So, Elka, what kind of a man | 爱尔卡 你想让我 |
| [02:18] | would you like me to find for you? | 帮你找什么样的男人呢 |
| [02:20] | You know how last year | 你还记得去年 |
| [02:21] | all I wanted was a billionaire? | 我唯一的要求就是亿万富翁吗 |
| [02:23] | And you learned your lesson, hmm? | 然后你学到教训了吧 |
| [02:24] | Yes, I learned my lesson. | 是的 我汲取了教训 |
| [02:26] | I want another billionaire. | 我要再找一个亿万富翁 |
| [02:30] | Well, I’m all set. | 我的对象都安排好了 |
| [02:31] | Remember when we saw Jersey Boys, | 记得我们去看《泽西男孩》时 |
| [02:32] | and I thought the guy that played Frankie Valli was so cute. | 我觉得演法兰基·维力的演员很可爱吗 |
| [02:35] | Well, Elka somehow got me a date with him. | 爱尔卡不知如何帮我约到了他 |
| [02:37] | I just emailed him a naked picture. | 我不过是给他发了一张裸照 |
| [02:42] | – Of… – You. | -谁的 -你的 |
| [02:44] | I–I took it while you were asleep. | 趁你睡觉时偷拍的 |
| [02:48] | I don’t sleep naked. | 我从不裸睡啊 |
| [02:49] | I took some liberties. | 我帮你”解放”了一下 |
| [03:02] | Oh, no. | 不 |
| [03:04] | Elka, I just got a text from your billionaire. | 爱尔卡 我接到你那位亿万富翁的短信 |
| [03:06] | He–he can’t make it. | 他来不了了 |
| [03:07] | Really? Why? | 是吗 为什么 |
| [03:09] | Well, I guess he was somewhat involved in a drug cartel. | 我想他可能是卷入什么贩毒集团里了 |
| [03:14] | Drug cartel? | 贩毒集团 |
| [03:16] | Did you do any research at all? | 你都不查查背景的吗 |
| [03:18] | Seriously? A billionaire who wants to date a 90-year-old? | 你搞笑吧 要找肯和90岁老妇约会的亿万富翁 |
| [03:24] | First “Yes” you get, you go, “Okay.” | 别人愿意答应 我就谢天谢地了 |
| [03:28] | But, Elka, this I vow: | 不过爱尔卡 我发誓 |
| [03:30] | I will not rest until I find you the perfect date. | 不帮你找到完美的对象我绝不罢休 |
| [03:35] | Hey, is anybody here over 80? | 这里有人已经超过80岁了吗 |
| [03:38] | Well… | 很好 |
| [03:39] | There you go. | 找到了 |
| [03:41] | Lucky for you I like facial hair. | 算你走运 我中意大胡子 |
| [03:45] | I mean on men. | 我是说男人的大胡子 |
| [03:52] | Hey, what’s going on over there? | 那边出什么事了 |
| [03:53] | Oh, I think I know what’s happening. | 我知道出什么事了 |
| [03:56] | Oh, captain! | 船长 |
| [03:59] | Captain Lebeau? | 勒邦船长 |
| [04:01] | Victoria…look at you. | 维多利亚 看看你 |
| [04:06] | You’re a ten if by land and a ten if by sea. | 你不管在海上陆地上都是完美的十分啊 |
| [04:09] | Oh, well. | 你真好 |
| [04:10] | Does that make any sense? | 这话说得通吗 |
| [04:11] | Does it matter? | 对她来说无所谓 |
| [04:15] | So, uh, | 那个 |
| [04:16] | where are you from? | 你从哪里来啊 |
| [04:17] | Oh, up north. | 我来自北边 |
| [04:21] | Canada? | 加拿大 |
| [04:22] | A little farther north than that. | 比加拿大还北一点 |
| [04:25] | I have a rather large toy distribution center up there. | 我在那里有个大型的玩具分配中心 |
| [04:29] | It’s a seasonal business. | 是季节性的生意 |
| [04:32] | Father Brian! | 布莱恩神父 |
| [04:34] | – Oh, he’s cute. – Yeah. | -他挺可爱的 -没错 |
| [04:36] | Joy, this is Father Brian. | 乔依 这位是布莱恩神父 |
| [04:37] | Oh, it’s just Brian. | 叫我布莱恩就好 |
| [04:39] | As of two hours ago! | 我不做神父已经两小时了 |
| [04:40] | Here, I got this for you. | 我带了这个送给你 |
| [04:42] | Oh, a–a wrist corsage. | 是个手腕花环啊 |
| [04:46] | Oh, it’s wrong, isn’t it? | 我送错了 是吧 |
| [04:48] | I’m sorry. My last date was junior prom. | 抱歉 我上次约会还是在高三舞会上 |
| [04:53] | Is there a Mrs. Seasonally-based toymaker? | 季节性玩具商先生 你有太太吗 |
| [04:58] | There was, but we’re taking a break. | 原来有 不过我们分手了 |
| [05:01] | Oh, I get it. | 哦 我懂了 |
| [05:03] | My Max and I have what we call a… | 我家麦克斯和我谈的是 |
| [05:05] | an area code relationship. | “区号限定之恋” |
| [05:08] | What’s that? | 什么意思 |
| [05:09] | Well, when we’re in the same area code, | 当我们身处使用同一区号的地方时 |
| [05:11] | we’re faithful. | 我们忠于彼此 |
| [05:14] | But if he’s off gallivanting with those whores in Boca… | 当他在博卡和那些骚货浪里浪荡时 |
| [05:19] | I get to have my fun. | 我也不能亏待了自己 |
| [05:22] | Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. | 嚯嚯嚯 嚯嚯 |
| [05:26] | Well, you’re a playful little elf, aren’t you? | 你可真是个顽皮的小精灵 不是吗 |
| [05:38] | Hi, Jimmie. | 嗨 吉米 |
| [05:39] | I’m Melanie. I–I– | 我是梅兰妮 我…我 |
| [05:41] | I loved you in Jersey Boys. | 我爱死你在《泽西男孩》里的表演了 |
| [05:43] | And I just want to say I’m very embarrassed | 我朋友把那种照片发给你 |
| [05:44] | that friend sent that picture to you. | 真的让我很尴尬 |
| [05:46] | Ah, don’t worry about it. | 别放在心上 |
| [05:49] | I thought you looked fantastic. | 我觉得你看起来美极了 |
| [05:53] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [05:55] | Well, I know you sing in a high pitch, | 我知道你一直用高音唱歌 |
| [05:56] | but is that how you– | 但你说话也是… |
| [05:57] | I lower my voice for the speaking performance, | 我会在说台词时压低我的声线 |
| [06:00] | but it’s really bad if I do it all the time. | 但如果一直这么做 对我的嗓子不好 |
| [06:02] | I get nodes. | 我的脖子会肿大的 |
| [06:05] | And we’re sure that’s worse? | 你确定会比现在更糟吗 |
| [06:07] | Well, this is… the way I talk. | 嗯 这才是 我正常的说话声音 |
| [06:09] | Is–is that gonna be a problem? | 你对此有意见吗 |
| [06:13] | No! No, not at all. | 不 不会 没有的事 |
| [06:16] | I love it. | 我爱死了 |
| [06:18] | We are going to have an excellent time. | 我们会共度一个美好的夜晚 |
| [06:20] | Oh, what a night! | 哦 多么迷人的夜晚 |
| [06:25] | Oh, you’re perfect. | 你是如此的完美 |
| [06:27] | A perfect specimen of a man. | 一个完美男人的范本 |
| [06:30] | Everyone has an imperfection. | 人无完人 金无足赤 |
| [06:32] | You know, freckle, mole. | 什么雀斑啊 痣啊 |
| [06:34] | A tail. | 一条尾巴啊 |
| [06:37] | A what? | 一条什么 |
| [06:38] | A freckle on my back, from the sun. | 我后背上的一个雀斑 太阳晒的 |
| [06:40] | I swab the deck shirtless. | 我擦甲板时都是裸上身的 |
| [06:43] | No, no, no, no. | 不 不 不 不 |
| [06:44] | What was that last thing you said? | 你最后提到的东西是什么来着 |
| [06:46] | A tail? | 一条尾巴 |
| [06:47] | I have a tail. You know… | 我有一条尾巴 |
| [06:49] | A tail. | 弯弯的那种 |
| [06:52] | Am I using the right english word? | 英文里是这么说的吧 |
| [06:55] | Oh, God, I hope not. | 哦 天啊 我希望不是 |
| [06:58] | So you never been with a woman before? | 你之前从来没和女人交往过吗 |
| [07:01] | No! | 没有 |
| [07:02] | I feel so clueless about everything. | 这方面我一直摸不着门路 |
| [07:04] | All I know is what I’ve heard from people | 我的知识都是从那些 |
| [07:06] | who think it’s a good idea to go to | 喜欢向我们这些禁欲主义者 |
| [07:08] | a celibate guy for advice on their sex life. | 咨询性生活的人处听来的 |
| [07:11] | Are you saying you’re looking for someone to help you? | 你是不是在寻找一双援手 |
| [07:14] | Guide you? Mold you? | 指引你 塑造你 |
| [07:16] | Well, that would be fantastic. | 如果有的话那就太好了 |
| [07:19] | Well, if you want to be the best lover on the planet, | 如果你想成为尘世间最销魂的情郎 |
| [07:22] | listen to every single thing the woman says | 你要仔细倾听女人们说的每一件事 |
| [07:25] | and spend lots and lots of time doing those things. | 然后花大把大把的时间按她们说的去做 |
| [07:29] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [07:30] | Because that is not how I hear it described in confession. | 我在听别人忏悔时 他们可不是这么说的 |
| [07:34] | Well, forget everything you’ve heard in confessional. | 把你忏悔时听到的一切都统统忘掉 |
| [07:37] | Look to me for guidance. | 让我做你的指路明灯吧 |
| [07:38] | Oh, I truly feel I can. | 我真心觉得我可以 |
| [07:41] | Oh, Joy… you’re the most beautiful, | 乔依 你是造物主塑造过的 |
| [07:43] | fascinating creature God ever made. | 最美丽最迷人的生物 |
| [07:45] | – Oh, my. – I’m sorry. | -天啊 -抱歉 |
| [07:47] | Is that a normal thing to say on a first date? | 第一次约会就这么说是不是不合适 |
| [07:50] | Yep, totally normal. | 不会 合适得很 |
| [07:51] | Keep ’em coming. | 继续说 别停下 |
| [07:54] | I did Jersey Boys for the money. | 我接《泽西男孩》就是为了钱 |
| [07:56] | But what really feeds my soul is volunteering. | 但真正能滋润我灵魂的是去当义工 |
| [07:59] | Really? So what do you do? | 是吗 那你都做了什么 |
| [08:01] | I just got back from volunteering | 我刚从纳米比亚东北部地区的 |
| [08:03] | from a depressed town in northeastern Namibia. | 一个悲催小镇做完义工回来 |
| [08:07] | Totally wiped out by a flood. | 那里被洪水冲得一干二净 |
| [08:08] | The water kept getting higher… | 那水眼瞅着是越来越高 |
| [08:11] | and higher… | 越来越高 |
| [08:14] | Can I get you guys anything else to drink? | 你们要喝些什么吗 |
| [08:16] | Sherry? | 雪利酒 |
| [08:22] | Sherry, baby? | 雪利酒行吗 宝贝 |
| [08:26] | A vestigial tail. | 一条退化了的尾巴 |
| [08:27] | That really exists? | 这东西还真有吗 |
| [08:29] | My mother always said it made me special. | 我妈告诉我正是它让我与众不同 |
| [08:32] | But enough about the tail. | 不过我们暂且把尾巴放在一边 |
| [08:36] | I only have two days in Cleveland. | 我只能在克利夫兰待两天 |
| [08:38] | How should we spend this brief but magnificent time together? | 这短暂而又美妙的时光我们该如何共度呢 |
| [08:42] | Well, let’s see, um… | 让我想想啊 |
| [08:44] | You know, there are some fabulous restaurants. | 这儿有不少不错的馆子 |
| [08:45] | And then, of course, there’s the rock and roll hall of– | 当然 这还有摇滚名人堂… |
| [08:47] | Okay, the tail. Just tell me how long it is. | 回到尾巴的话题 告诉我它到底有多长 |
| [08:50] | I–I really need to know. | 我 我必须得知道 |
| [08:51] | I’m picturing it like– | 我自行脑补的模样是 |
| [08:52] | like the nub of a boxer. | 平角裤上出现一个突起 |
| [08:55] | I have no nub. | 我那可不是突起 |
| [08:57] | I’m a grown man. | 我是一个成年人 |
| [08:58] | I have a grown man’s tail. | 尾巴也是成年人该有的样子 |
| [09:02] | He has a tail! | 他有条尾巴 |
| [09:05] | Now, how could we not know this? | 我们怎么就没发现呢 |
| [09:08] | Well, I never got that far with him on the boat. | 在船上时 我还没能跟他到那一步 |
| [09:10] | Nor were there any flies to whap away. | 也没有苍蝇能让他用尾巴赶走 |
| [09:15] | I’m glad that you all find this so amusing. | 我很欣慰你们能从我的苦中作出乐来 |
| [09:17] | I’m sorry, it just feels so good to be able to laugh. | 不好意思 我只是觉得可以放声大笑真好 |
| [09:20] | My date sounds like mickey mouse, | 跟我约会那位说起话来就像米老鼠 |
| [09:22] | and I’m having a hard time keeping it together every time he talks. | 每次他一张嘴 我憋笑憋得快要难受死了 |
| [09:24] | Excuse me. | 不好意思 |
| [09:25] | Do you know where the little boy’s room is? | 请问男士洗手间在哪里 |
| [09:28] | That’s him. | 就是他 |
| [09:29] | How am I supposed to deal with that? | 这让我如何是好 |
| [09:30] | All right, here’s what you do. | 你应该这么做 |
| [09:32] | Now, whenever I felt like I was about | 每当我意识到我将要 |
| [09:33] | to ruin a scene by laughing, | 在表演中笑场时 |
| [09:35] | I would bite the inside of my mouth. | 我就咬腮帮子上的肉 |
| [09:37] | I once lost a large chunk of cheek | 有一次我面对着体育台的 |
| [09:39] | when I was doing love letters opposite ESPN’s Chris Berman. | 秃头克里斯·伯曼念情书 害我咬掉脸颊一大块肉呢 |
| [09:45] | Well, my date is going great. | 我的约会对象表现很好 |
| [09:48] | He finds me so irresistible. | 他完全挡不住我的魅力啊 |
| [09:50] | He’s giving up the priesthood for me. | 他都为我放弃神职了 |
| [09:52] | Like in the Thorn Birds. | 就像名著《荆棘鸟》里面那样 |
| [09:54] | Well, my date… | 我的约会对象 |
| [09:56] | is Santa Claus. | 是圣诞老人 |
| [09:59] | You mean, he looks like Santa Claus? | 是说他长得像圣诞老人吧 |
| [10:00] | No, I think he is Santa Claus. | 不 我觉得他就是圣诞老人本尊 |
| [10:04] | But things aren’t going so well for him. | 不过他最近可不怎么好 |
| [10:06] | He and Mrs. Claus are taking a break. | 他和圣诞婆婆分居了 |
| [10:08] | It–oh, it’s a whole thing. | 说起来话就长了 |
| [10:11] | And what makes you think he’s Santa? | 你怎么会觉得他是圣诞老人 |
| [10:13] | Look, I’m not crazy. | 我还没老糊涂呢 |
| [10:15] | Everything he says points straight to it. | 他说的每件事都证明了这一点 |
| [10:18] | I’ll get him to admit it. You just wait. | 我会让他承认的 你们等着吧 |
| [10:21] | Elka, you have a very active imagination. | 爱尔卡 你想象力真够丰富的 |
| [10:23] | However, may I remind everyone that my date has a tail. | 然而 让我再次提醒 我的约会对象长了尾巴 |
| [10:29] | Yeah, now, is it a big tail, or is it more like a stub? | 是很长的尾巴 还是只有一小截 |
| [10:32] | He’s a grown man… | 他是个大人了 |
| [10:34] | It’s a grown man’s tail. | 尾巴也是大人的尾巴 |
| [10:40] | 饼干和牛奶 是平安夜给圣诞老人准备的点心 | |
| [10:46] | Oh, I am so sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [10:48] | No problem. | 没关系 |
| [10:50] | – Santa… – Yes? | -圣诞老人 -什么事 |
| [10:52] | I knew it! | 我就知道是你 |
| [10:53] | You are Santa Claus. | 你是圣诞老人 |
| [10:55] | All right. Okay, okay. | 好吧 好吧 |
| [10:57] | Not so loudly. | 别这么大声啊 |
| [10:59] | Yeah, but what are you doing? | 好吧 你在这干什么啊 |
| [11:00] | Why are you here? | 怎么会来这里呢 |
| [11:02] | Well, if you must know, | 你非得知道的话 |
| [11:03] | I–I like Cleveland. | 我喜欢克利夫兰 |
| [11:05] | I fit in. | 我能轻松融入 |
| [11:06] | I’ve decided to move here and open a chipotle. | 我决定搬到这来开家墨西哥卷饼店 |
| [11:11] | Chipotle? | 墨西哥卷饼店 |
| [11:12] | Yeah, you know, great burritos, | 对啊 卖好吃的墨西哥卷 |
| [11:14] | – organic ingredients… – I know what chipotle is. | -有机食材 -我知道墨西哥卷饼店是什么 |
| [11:17] | But what about you being Santa? | 可你是圣诞老人啊 |
| [11:20] | Well, frankly, I’ve had enough of it. | 说实话 我已经受够了 |
| [11:23] | You try carrying around the burden of knowing | 永远都知道谁淘气谁听话 |
| [11:24] | who’s naughty and who’s nice. | 压力很大的啊 |
| [11:27] | It’s too much for one man. | 一个人真的承受不了 |
| [11:29] | Well, you take this bar here. | 就拿这个酒吧来说 |
| [11:30] | Naughty. | 淘气的 |
| [11:32] | Real naughty. | 非常淘气的 |
| [11:35] | What about me? | 那我呢 |
| [11:36] | Well, you’re just naughty enough. | 你淘气得刚刚好 |
| [11:39] | Oh, Santa. | 哎呀 小圣 |
| [11:45] | And, finally, the golden rule | 最后要告诉你 最重要的规则 |
| [11:46] | is the three-second rule. | 就是三秒钟规则 |
| [11:49] | What’s that? | 什么意思 |
| [11:50] | It means you can’t look at another woman for more than three seconds. | 就是说你不能看别的女人超过三秒钟 |
| [11:54] | Well, why would I do that when I’m looking at you? | 有你这样的美女 为何还要看别人啊 |
| [11:57] | That does sound crazy. | 说的也是 |
| [12:00] | But some men– | 不过有些男人 |
| [12:01] | bad men– like to scope out all the other women in the room. | 坏男人就喜欢乱瞄其他女人 |
| [12:04] | Really? I wonder why. | 真的吗 真想不通 |
| [12:11] | I think I might be a bad man. | 我想我可能是个坏男人 |
| [12:15] | No! You’re not a bad man. | 不 你不是的 |
| [12:16] | Stop looking! | 别看了 |
| [12:18] | I am breaking Matthew 5:28 all over the place. | 根据《马太福音》说的我已经犯通奸罪了 |
| [12:21] | 凡看见妇女就动淫念的 这人心里已经与她犯奸淫了 | |
| [12:22] | I mean, look at those legs. | 看看这些美腿 |
| [12:23] | Yes, look at them! | 没错 看美腿 |
| [12:26] | Although, I don’t know. Maybe I’m not a leg man. | 不过 我可能不是爱美腿一族 |
| [12:27] | Maybe I’m into something else. | 没准我另有所好 |
| [12:32] | No, no–you’re definitely a leg man. | 不 你绝对是爱美腿一族 |
| [12:35] | I’ve been giving communion to that? | 我给那位派发过圣餐吗 |
| [12:39] | So, tell me, have you ever thought of… | 告诉我 你有没有想过 |
| [12:41] | having it removed? | 把尾巴去掉呢 |
| [12:42] | You Americans. | 你们这些美国人 |
| [12:44] | You always want to have plastic surgery | 总是想用整形手术 |
| [12:46] | to get rid of any tiny imperfection. | 来改善那些小缺陷 |
| [12:48] | This is not how we do it in France. | 我们法国人可不这样 |
| [12:49] | No, but in your circumstance– | 但是你的情况特殊啊 |
| [12:51] | It is said that the most beautiful woman in the world– | 据说 世上最美的女人 |
| [12:54] | Catherine Deneuve– has a tail. | 凯瑟琳·德纳芙就有尾巴 |
| [12:58] | What? | 什么 |
| [12:59] | You know the saying. | 不是都说 |
| [13:00] | “You wouldn’t kick Catherine Deneuve out of bed | “你不会因为凯瑟琳·德纳芙摇尾巴 |
| [13:02] | for wagging her tail.” | 就把她踢下床” |
| [13:05] | No. | 真没听过 |
| [13:08] | In French, it rhymes. | 用法文说 还押韵呢 |
| [13:10] | And it’s a little bit more clever. | 而且也比用英语说更有哲理 |
| [13:17] | So what do you plan on doing when Jersey Boys is over? | 《泽西男孩》演完之后你准备干什么呢 |
| [13:19] | Actually, I’m auditioning for a production of Richard III. | 我打算去《理查三世》剧组试镜 |
| [13:24] | Really? I love Shakespeare. | 真的啊 我很喜欢莎士比亚 |
| [13:25] | Really? Well, then… | 是吗 那我献丑了 |
| [13:28] | Oh, gosh. | 天呐 |
| [13:31] | Now is the winter of our discontent | 严冬般的宿怨 |
| [13:34] | Made glorious summer by this sun of York. | 即将被约克之光照耀成融融夏景 |
| [13:38] | And all the clouds that lour’d upon our house… | 笼罩王室的片片愁云 |
| [13:43] | And then I introduced him to scoping, | 接着我让他学会了乱瞄女人 |
| [13:44] | And he scoped out Melanie’s breasts. | 他就一直盯着梅兰妮的胸看 |
| [13:47] | They are having a good night tonight. | 我的胸今晚的确是美得很 |
| [13:50] | I mean, rude! | 我是说 太过分了 |
| [13:52] | I was so close to creating the perfect man. | 我差点就创造了完美男人 |
| [13:55] | There’s no such thing, Joy. | 乔依 世上根本没有完美男人 |
| [13:57] | Even God takes a perfect man and slaps a tail on him. | 就算上帝造了一个 还给他加上了尾巴呢 |
| [14:02] | So how’s it going on your date, Elka? | 爱尔卡 你的约会怎么样啊 |
| [14:03] | Oh, not well. | 不怎么样 |
| [14:05] | I mean, he’s admitted he is Santa, | 他倒是承认自己是圣诞老人 |
| [14:08] | but he wants to quit his job. | 但他不想干了 |
| [14:10] | Well, he can’t do that. | 这可不行啊 |
| [14:12] | We don’t have anything if we don’t have Santa. | 没有圣诞老人 就什么都没了 |
| [14:15] | And we all need a little magic in this world. | 这个世界人人都需要一点魔法 |
| [14:17] | We do need magic. | 我们的确需要魔法 |
| [14:19] | You’re gonna have to go out there | 你现在赶快出去 |
| [14:20] | and save christmas, Elka. | 拯救圣诞节吧 爱尔卡 |
| [14:23] | You have never been so right. | 你终于说对了一次 |
| [14:26] | Thank you, Victoria. | 维多利亚 谢谢 |
| [14:31] | Okay, crazy lady’s gone. | 好了 疯女人走了 |
| [14:33] | And I have an announcement to make. | 我有话告诉大家 |
| [14:35] | The captain is not interested in losing his tail, | 船长是不肯去弄掉尾巴了 |
| [14:37] | and I have decided to respect his choice. | 我决定尊重他的选择 |
| [14:40] | Well, that’s very grown up of you. | 你简直太懂事了 |
| [14:42] | Hey, listen, I’ve gone out with my share of men | 听着 以前和我约会的男人们 |
| [14:44] | who I would rate a six at best. | 我最高给他们打六分 |
| [14:46] | Going into this date, Captain Lebeau is a 10. | 这次约会之初 我给勒邦船长打十分 |
| [14:49] | And the tail, ah, maybe knocks him down to an eight. | 知道他长了条尾巴之后 直接降到八分 |
| [14:52] | So does it wag when he’s happy, | 他的尾巴是不是高兴的时候会摇 |
| [14:54] | or get all fluffy when he’s scared? | 害怕的时候会炸毛啊 |
| [14:57] | It isn’t furry, Melanie. | 上面没长毛 梅兰妮 |
| [15:00] | I don’t think. | 我觉得没长 |
| [15:01] | He’s an eight! | 他可是个八分好男人 |
| [15:06] | You need to keep doing good to inspire good in the world. | 你要继续行善 以此来鼓励世人行善 |
| [15:11] | There already is good in the world. | 这世上又不缺好东西 |
| [15:13] | Chipotle is good. | 墨西哥卷饼店就不错 |
| [15:16] | Okay, Santa. | 好吧 圣诞老人 |
| [15:17] | I really need you to forget Chipotle | 你先别管墨西哥卷饼店 |
| [15:21] | and listen to me. | 听我说 |
| [15:23] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [15:25] | When I was a-a child in Poland, | 我小时候住在波兰 |
| [15:27] | I mean, my family had had a particularly hard year. | 有一年我家的经济状况尤其不好 |
| [15:31] | We didn’t expect any presents for Christmas. | 我们没敢奢望能收到圣诞礼物 |
| [15:34] | But…somehow, there were. | 但最后还是收到了 |
| [15:37] | Well, that was my job. | 那是我的职责嘛 |
| [15:39] | I mean, there weren’t millions of gifts. | 虽然礼物不多 |
| [15:42] | But the fact that you came at all meant everything to us. | 但你的光临对我们意义重大 |
| [15:46] | To me. | 对我也是 |
| [15:48] | Elka… | 爱尔卡 |
| [15:51] | Hello, Melanie. | 你好 梅兰妮 |
| [15:54] | Where are you going? | 你这是要去哪儿 |
| [15:56] | Oh, I just have to ask Melanie a question. | 我就是想问梅兰妮一个问题 |
| [15:58] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [15:59] | Don’t worry, Joy. | 别担心 乔依 |
| [16:01] | I’m still in love with you. | 我还是爱你的 |
| [16:03] | I’m just also in love with your breasts. | 我只是同时爱上了你的双峰 |
| [16:06] | Not cool, dude! | 你太过分了 哥们 |
| [16:09] | Not cool! | 太过分了 |
| [16:12] | Am I funny? | 我很好笑吗 |
| [16:13] | I make you laugh? | 我把你逗笑了吗 |
| [16:14] | I’m sorry, but, yes, you do. | 不好意思 但你确实很好笑 |
| [16:16] | And, uh, could you say, “Oh, no, Mr. Bill,” for me? | 你能说句”不 比尔先生”给我听听吗 |
| [16:19] | 比尔先生是《周六夜现场》的卡通人物 语调与此人相近 | |
| [16:21] | Jimmy, please– | 吉米 淡定 |
| [16:22] | I am gonna waste your ass– | 我要打断你的狗腿 |
| [16:24] | Gentlemen, stop! | 二位 住手 |
| [16:26] | Sir, you came here with one woman. | 先生 你是来和这位女士约会的 |
| [16:29] | And this is who you will stay with. | 所以你要专注于她一个人 |
| [16:32] | I would never talk to another woman | 我能有幸与如花似玉的 |
| [16:34] | when I’m fortunate enough | 维多利亚·蔡斯约会 |
| [16:35] | to be in the presence of beautiful Victoria Chase. | 我绝不会多看别的女人一眼 |
| [16:39] | He just got bumped up to a nine. | 这句话帮他加到了九分 |
| [16:43] | And you, sir, yes, | 而你呢 先生 |
| [16:44] | you have a silly voice that people laugh at. | 虽说你的声音很娘 受尽嘲笑 |
| [16:48] | But you should be proud of yourself… | 但你应该为自己骄傲 |
| [16:49] | No matter your shortcomings. | 无论你有什么缺点 |
| [16:52] | I, myself, have– | 我本人就有… |
| [16:54] | a beautiful face! | 一张俊朗的面庞 |
| [16:55] | And, really, nothing else really matters, does it? | 其他的都不重要了 不是吗 |
| [16:57] | Great speech. Come on. | 这番话说得真好 走吧 |
| [17:02] | Well, that was entertaining. | 刚才那幕真欢乐 |
| [17:04] | I… | 我… |
| [17:07] | Excuse me, miss. | 打扰一下 小姐 |
| [17:09] | Do you know what happened to the gentleman who was sitting here? | 你知道刚才坐在这儿的那位先生去哪儿了吗 |
| [17:12] | Who, Eric? I don’t know. | 你说埃里克吗 我不知道 |
| [17:13] | Maybe he went back to the homeless shelter. | 他可能回流浪者之家了吧 |
| [17:16] | He’s off his rocker. | 他疯疯癫癫的 |
| [17:18] | You know, he told a waitress here that he was Santa. | 他竟然跟这里的女招待说他是圣诞老人 |
| [17:21] | Crazy old dude. | 真是个疯老头子 |
| [17:23] | Listen, missy, | 听着 小姐 |
| [17:24] | that kind of name calling | 对他这么出言不逊 |
| [17:26] | won’t get you off the naughty list anytime soon. | 你就在坏孩子名单上多待会儿吧 |
| [17:33] | I’m sorry I got carried away. | 抱歉我被别人勾跑了 |
| [17:36] | I’ll always think of you as my first, Joy. | 我会永远把你当成我的初恋 乔依 |
| [17:38] | Until you actually have your first, | 等你找到了真正的初恋 |
| [17:40] | and then you really won’t. | 就不会把我当初恋了 |
| [17:46] | So I…guess my voice is too ridiculous. | 看来我的声音确实太滑稽了 |
| [17:50] | I’m so sorry I hurt your feelings. | 抱歉我伤了你的自尊 |
| [17:52] | I’m very immature. | 我太不成熟了 |
| [17:55] | Melanie… | 梅兰妮 |
| [17:58] | Let’s just say every night on stage, | 这么说吧 每晚在舞台上 |
| [18:01] | I sing, Big Girls Don’t Cry. | 我都会唱《女孩别哭》 |
| [18:05] | But tonight, well, | 但是今晚 |
| [18:06] | This big boy… | 我这个大男孩 |
| [18:08] | actually might. | 很可能会留下伤心泪 |
| [18:14] | You’ll never know what you missed. | 你不知道自己错过了多好的男人 |
| [18:17] | Well, now I want you back. | 我现在想挽回你了 |
| [18:18] | – Really? – No. | -真的吗 -算了吧 |
| [18:19] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [18:23] | So… | 那… |
| [18:25] | Would you like to go back to my hotel room? | 想跟我回酒店吗 |
| [18:27] | Aye aye, captain. | 好呀 船长 |
| [18:29] | Wonderful. | 太好了 |
| [18:32] | Let’s see what we have here. | 看看我们都点了什么 |
| [18:37] | You have the salmon. | 你点了鲑鱼 |
| [18:40] | Two glasses of wine. | 两杯红酒 |
| [18:43] | And, let’s face it, most of the mushroom caps. | 大多数的蘑菇伞 别不承认 |
| [18:48] | I think you owe $37 to my $32. | 你付37块 我付32块 |
| [18:53] | What? | 什么 |
| [18:55] | Now, I was willing to take the tail. | 我本打算接受你那条尾巴了 |
| [18:57] | But being cheap, ho ho, | 但你竟然这么小气 这一点 |
| [18:59] | that takes you down to a five. | 让你狂降到五分 |
| [19:02] | And I… will not date a five. | 跟五分男人约会 姐觉得掉价 |
| [19:11] | So what have we learned on our special day? | 在这个特殊的日子 我们都得到了什么教训 |
| [19:12] | That this was a terrible idea. | “生日约会”这个主意太烂了 |
| [19:14] | – Happy birthday. – Happy birthday. | -生日快乐 -生日快乐 |
| [19:17] | You know, maybe we should just forget fixing each other up with men | 或许我们不该互相牵线搭桥 |
| [19:20] | and enjoy each other’s company. | 而应该享受彼此的陪伴 |
| [19:21] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [19:23] | Ooh! Hot firemen. | 哎呦 帅到喷火的消防员 |
| [19:25] | But…you just gave that whole speech about– | 你不是刚刚才说… |
| [19:26] | Shut up, Joy. | 闭嘴吧 乔依 |
| [19:29] | Hello, hero. | 你好啊 英雄 |
| [19:30] | Hello, ladies. | 你们好呀 女士们 |
| [19:31] | Can we buy you a drink? | 能请你们喝一杯吗 |
| [19:34] | Yes, thank you. | 可以 谢谢 |