| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience. | 《燃情克利夫兰》是在摄影棚观众前现场录制的 |
| [00:06] | Hi, Elka. | 嗨 爱尔卡 |
| [00:07] | It’s good to be home. Warm smile. | 回到家真开心 热情笑脸 |
| [00:11] | Why did she say “warm smile”? | 她为何要说”热情笑脸” |
| [00:13] | Our faces are frozen from a special form of botox. | 我们的脸因为注射了特殊肉毒杆菌 僵掉了 |
| [00:18] | So for the next 24 hours, | 所以接下来的24小时内 |
| [00:20] | the only way we can express our emotions is to say them. | 我们只能通过描述表情来表达感情 |
| [00:24] | Slightly embarrassed from the situation red face. | 带着一丝尴尬的小红脸 |
| [00:29] | Why would you fly to Los Angeles | 你们为了让脸僵掉 |
| [00:31] | to get your faces frozen? | 居然还大老远飞去洛杉矶 |
| [00:33] | Couldn’t you just stay here | 留在克利夫兰 |
| [00:34] | and stick your heads in a snow drift? | 把脸埋在雪堆里就好了嘛 |
| [00:38] | We have to get our treatments in L.A. | 这事只能在洛杉矶办 |
| [00:40] | because that’s where Dr. Minton is. | 因为明顿医生在那里 |
| [00:41] | That man is a genius. | 那人就是个天才 |
| [00:43] | Dr. Minton is the best dermatologist in the country. | 明顿医生是国内首屈一指的皮肤科医生 |
| [00:46] | He’s the reason we don’t look unnatural. | 我们表情这么自然都是他的功劳 |
| [00:51] | Every a-list celebrity goes to him. | 一线名流都去找他 |
| [00:53] | How did you get in? | 那你是怎么混进去的 |
| [00:56] | We have a gateway friend. | 我们可以走后门 |
| [00:58] | A gateway friend is someone | 所谓后门 就是能把你弄进 |
| [01:00] | who can get you into every place exclusive. | 各大高档私密场所的朋友 |
| [01:04] | Our gateway friend | 我们的后门 |
| [01:05] | is Dr. Minton’s receptionist/ girlfriend Courtney. | 就是明顿医生的前台兼女友柯特妮 |
| [01:07] | When we’re in L.A., I do her eyebrows | 在洛杉矶时 我负责帮她修眉 |
| [01:09] | and Victoria takes her to premieres | 维多利亚则带她去参加首映礼 |
| [01:11] | in exchange for appointments. | 然后她就帮我们约诊 |
| [01:13] | What do you do for her? | 那你为她做了什么 |
| [01:16] | Not really caring. | 你不说也无所谓 |
| [01:21] | I listen to her relationship problems. | 我负责听她倾诉恋爱问题 |
| [01:23] | Yes, for the past three days, | 没错 刚过去的三天内 |
| [01:25] | Melanie has had a fake smile plastered on her face | 梅兰妮一直在皮笑肉不笑 |
| [01:27] | just so she could get a fake smile plastered on her face. | 以换到现在脸上的皮肉都不笑 |
| [01:32] | Oh, that’s Courtney now. | 是柯特妮打来的 |
| [01:33] | Hey, Court, what’s up? | 你好啊 小柯 怎么了 |
| [01:38] | What? | 什么 |
| [01:39] | Look of panic. | 惊慌失措脸 |
| [01:43] | Of course you can come stay with us in Cleveland | 你当然可以来克利夫兰跟我们一起住 |
| [01:46] | and cry on our shoulders. | 抱着我们痛哭 |
| [01:48] | Oh, okay, we’ll see you when you get here. | 好的 到时候见 |
| [01:51] | Bye-bye. | 再见 |
| [01:53] | She broke up with Dr. Minton | 她跟明顿医生分手了 |
| [01:54] | and quit her job as his receptionist. | 还辞了前台的工作 |
| [01:57] | We lost our gateway? | 后门被封上了吗 |
| [01:59] | Jaw drop, Melanie, jaw drop. | 惊讶脸 梅兰妮 惊讶脸 |
| [02:12] | Have your faces unfrozen yet? | 请问你们的脸化冻了吗 |
| [02:14] | Because I wanna see anger and outrage. | 因为姐现在想看到怒火和愤慨 |
| [02:19] | Why, what’s up? | 为什么 出什么事了 |
| [02:22] | “Help keep Cleveland the forest city”. | “救救绿树如茵的克利夫兰吧” |
| [02:24] | “Save 100-year-old historic oak tree from destruction.” | “拯救一棵百年橡树免受砍伐” |
| [02:27] | But this is at the end of our block. | 这是我们街区尽头那棵呢 |
| [02:29] | Why would someone want to get rid of that beautiful old tree? | 怎么会有人想要砍掉那么美的老树啊 |
| [02:31] | A developer bought the lot and he plans to bulldoze it. | 一个开发商买下了那块地方 打算把那儿夷为平地 |
| [02:35] | Oh, that’s terrible. | 这也太混账了 |
| [02:36] | They wanna put in a day SPA. | 他们想建一家日间水疗会所 |
| [02:38] | – Finally, oh! – That’s fantastic. | -终于盼到了 -太棒了 |
| [02:42] | Elka, I’m sorry. | 爱尔卡 很抱歉 |
| [02:43] | But that means that we’d have a day SPA, | 不过那意味着日间水疗会所 |
| [02:45] | a wine bar, and a fire station, all within walking distance. | 酒吧以及消防站都齐活了 而且信步可达 |
| [02:48] | Oh, it’s the single ladies’ holy trinity. | 这简直是单身女人的三位一体 |
| [02:54] | – Can someone open the door? – Yeah, yeah. | -谁能来开开门吗 -好 好 |
| [02:56] | We’re coming. | 来了来了 |
| [02:59] | Hello, girls. | 姑娘们好啊 |
| [03:00] | Oh, hello, Courtney. | 你好啊 柯特妮 |
| [03:05] | Can you give me a hand? | 能搭把手吗 |
| [03:06] | She fainted getting out of the car. | 她从车里出来就晕了 |
| [03:16] | Thank you, I feel much better now. | 谢谢你们 我感觉好多了 |
| [03:17] | I just got lightheaded from the lack of smog. | 没有废气包围 我就头晕眼花了 |
| [03:21] | Right, honey, we should’ve warned you. | 没错 亲爱的 我们早该提醒你的 |
| [03:22] | If you haven’t been outside of L.A. in quite a while, | 一旦你在洛杉矶待得时间久了 |
| [03:23] | the pure oxygen can be overwhelming. | 外头纯净的氧气会让你受不了 |
| [03:27] | Yeah, sometimes when I get homesick, | 是啊 有时候我想家了 |
| [03:28] | I let the car run with the garage door closed. | 就关上车库门发动车 陶醉在尾气里 |
| [03:31] | Springtime in L.A.. | 如同春日里的洛杉矶 |
| [03:34] | How are your faces doing? | 你们的脸恢复得如何 |
| [03:37] | Excellent. | 很好 |
| [03:38] | No visible lines. | 完美无瑕 |
| [03:41] | Everything looks to be in order. | 平整而光滑 |
| [03:47] | How did this happen? | 你怎么会变成这样 |
| [03:48] | I’m 90. | 我90岁了 |
| [03:52] | Since everyone lies about their age by at least 20, | 按照每个人都至少少报20岁的规矩 |
| [03:54] | that makes you 110. | 您老都110岁啦 |
| [03:57] | I’m 90. | 姐真90岁 |
| [03:59] | How long have you been without oxygen? | 你缺氧都多长时间了 |
| [04:02] | Well, I moved to L.A. in 1980… | 我想想 我是1980年搬到洛杉矶的 |
| [04:04] | Hey, you’re trying to get me to reveal my real age. | 等等 你是想套出我的真实年龄吧 |
| [04:09] | She’s good. | 她这手段真厉害 |
| [04:11] | Courtney, we are delighted that you came to us in your time of need, | 柯特妮 我们很高兴你在需要帮助时来找我们 |
| [04:14] | but isn’t there any way that you could patch things up with Dr. Minton? | 但你跟明顿医生就毫无可能破镜重圆了吗 |
| [04:19] | No, and now you’ve got me sobbing again. | 没可能了 你又害我抽泣了 |
| [04:22] | I don’t see any tears. | 可我没看到眼泪啊 |
| [04:24] | The last time Dr. Minton and I broke up, | 上次明顿医生跟我分手后 |
| [04:26] | he said he would never make me cry again. | 他说再也不会让我哭泣 |
| [04:27] | So he removed my tear ducts. | 于是他把我的泪腺管切除了 |
| [04:32] | Genius. | 天才啊 |
| [04:34] | Well, I’m off to save a tree. | 我要出发去拯救大树了 |
| [04:36] | Let me know how this all turns out. | 回头给我讲讲后续的事 |
| [04:39] | Or don’t. | 不讲也成 |
| [04:40] | I don’t really care. | 姐压根就不在乎 |
| [04:44] | Do you mind if I use your powder room? | 我能用一下盥洗室吗 |
| [04:47] | I just started an aggressive round of experimental face cream, | 我做了个药效超猛的试验面霜疗程 |
| [04:50] | and every two hours I have to make sure my skin isn’t eating itself. | 每隔两小时 我就得确认下皮肤没有自我吞噬 |
| [04:54] | Yeah, sure, it’s down the hall, to the left. | 当然可以 走到头左手边就是 |
| [04:56] | – Thank you. – Okay. | -谢谢 -没事 |
| [04:59] | Okay, this is gonna be harder than we thought. | 听着 这比我们想象中的艰难多了 |
| [05:01] | We talked in the car. | 我跟她在车上聊了会儿 |
| [05:02] | She swears it is over between her and Dr. Minton. | 她发誓她跟明顿医生彻底玩完了 |
| [05:04] | There is no way it’s over until we say it’s over. | 没有我们的批准 谁都别想玩完 |
| [05:08] | No, it’s time to pull out the big guns. | 不行 是时候使出绝招了 |
| [05:10] | I say we try the three-pronged attack. | 我建议 我们分三路出击 |
| [05:12] | Agreed. I’ll take “cold, hard facts for women over 40.” | 同意 我来描述「女人40后凄凉的现实」 |
| [05:15] | And I will do “yes, but”s. | 我负责「没错 但是」这一块 |
| [05:17] | And I’ll make up a pathetic single friend | 我则负责捏造出一个悲催朋友的故事 |
| [05:19] | as a cautionary tale. | 用来做前车之鉴 |
| [05:22] | Just don’t call her “Joy” this time. | 求你这次不要又给她取名叫乔依 |
| [05:26] | But it’s such a good name | 对一个生活凄楚的人来说 |
| [05:27] | for someone who’s a complete mess. | 这名字实在是绝配啊[Joy:欢愉] |
| [05:30] | Don’t take it personally. | 别往心里去哦 |
| [05:32] | Oh, here she comes. | 她来了 |
| [05:36] | There were no prescriptions in your medicine cabinet. | 你们的药橱里连个处方药都没有 |
| [05:39] | How do you stay happy here? | 你们靠什么来保持开心呢 |
| [05:42] | Oh, we’re always happy here. | 我们一直过得很开心 |
| [05:44] | Unless one of us is going through a break-up. | 除非其中一人的恋情告吹了 |
| [05:47] | Which reminds me- | 说到这个我想起来了 |
| [05:48] | Did you know a single woman over 40 is more likely | 你知道单身女人一旦过了40岁 |
| [05:52] | to be attacked by an ostrich | 重新开始一段感情的几率 |
| [05:53] | than meet a new man after a break-up? | 可是比被鸵鸟袭击还小呢 |
| [05:57] | That’s a frightening statistic. | 这个数据还真恐怖 |
| [05:59] | Still, I think I could do better | 不过 我想我能找到更好的 |
| [06:00] | than someone who’s afraid of commitment. | 毕竟他是个不敢结婚的渣男 |
| [06:02] | Yes, but… Could you? | 没错 但是 你真的能吗 |
| [06:04] | I think so. | 我觉得能 |
| [06:06] | Yes, but… Really? | 没错 但是 真的吗 |
| [06:08] | Maybe. | 或许吧 |
| [06:09] | Yes, but… Seriously? | 没错 但是 你再仔细想想 |
| [06:13] | I never thought of it like that. | 我从来就没往这方面去想过 |
| [06:16] | You know, a- a similar thing happened to my friend Joy. | 我的一个朋友乔依 就遇到过与此类似的情况 |
| [06:19] | Not this Joy. | 不是这个乔依 |
| [06:21] | Uh, two years ago, she got out of a long-term relationship, | 两年前 她和交往多年的男友分手了 |
| [06:23] | and right now, she is living on her own | 现如今她独自一人住在 |
| [06:25] | in a studio apartment in Reseda. | 洛杉矶郊区里西达的单间公寓里 |
| [06:28] | The valley? | 山谷那边吗 |
| [06:31] | I am just so proud of her. | 我实在是为她感到骄傲 |
| [06:32] | I mean, she doesn’t need a man to be happy. | 她不需要男人 一个人也过得很开心 |
| [06:34] | That’s what her 52 cats are for. | 只要有她的52只猫就够了 |
| [06:37] | Oh, my God, you girls are right. | 我的妈呀 你们说得对 |
| [06:39] | I have to get back together with Dr. Minton. | 我必须和明顿医生重归于好 |
| [06:40] | – I don’t wanna be like Joy. – Oh, no one does. | -我才不要过得像乔依一样凄惨 -谁都不想 |
| [06:45] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [06:54] | Is this the valley? | 我们到山谷了吗 |
| [06:58] | We keep telling you Cleveland doesn’t have a valley. | 跟你说多少次了 克利夫兰没有山谷 |
| [07:00] | Looks like the valley. | 可看起来就像啊 |
| [07:02] | Come on, come on. We’re here to celebrate. | 过来过来 我们来庆祝一下 |
| [07:04] | You’re getting back together with a Beverly Hills doctor. | 你即将和比弗利山庄的名医破镜重圆了 |
| [07:06] | You’re right. A round of drinks, | 你说得对 喝完一轮后 |
| [07:07] | and then off to the airport. | 我就启程去机场 |
| [07:11] | Wait, all the men are looking at me. | 等等 男人的目光都集中在我身上 |
| [07:13] | Well, that’s what men do here. | 这里的男人就爱这样 |
| [07:15] | I remember that look. It’s desire. | 我记得这种眼神 写满了渴望 |
| [07:19] | Isn’t that funny? | 好笑吧 |
| [07:19] | That’s what we said the first time we came to Cleveland. | 我们刚来克利夫兰时也是这么说的 |
| [07:21] | Oh, my God, they’re positively leering. | 他们明目张胆地向我送秋波呢 |
| [07:23] | Even guys younger than my fake age are looking at me. | 比我谎报20岁后还小的男人都在看我 |
| [07:28] | Uh-oh. | 糟了 |
| [07:30] | I’m gonna do something I haven’t done in 20 years- | 我要干点20年来都不敢做的事了 |
| [07:33] | Relax my stomach muscles. | 放松我的肚腩肉 |
| [07:37] | Oh, my God, they’re still looking. | 天啊 这样他们也还是盯着我 |
| [07:40] | Melanie, your christmas letters were true. | 梅兰妮 你圣诞贺信上写的事是真的呢 |
| [07:41] | – Yes, but- – “Yes, but” nothing. | -没错 但是… -没有什么但是 |
| [07:43] | These animals view me as nothing but a mindless sex object, | 这些禽兽视我如胸大无脑的货 |
| [07:47] | and I’m gonna go show them that they’re right. | 姐这就让他们知道 他们想得没有错 |
| [07:49] | Hi, I’m Courtney. | 嗨 我叫柯特妮 |
| [07:53] | We’re idiots. | 我们这群蠢蛋 |
| [07:55] | It was a mistake coming here. | 带她来这儿就是个大错 |
| [07:56] | We should’ve kept her isolated from the indigenous population. | 我们就该把她和本地居民隔离开来 |
| [08:00] | I don’t know what’s worse- | 我不知道该吐槽哪一件事 |
| [08:01] | You telling outsiders about our special powers here, | 是你向外人透露我们在这里的魔力呢 |
| [08:04] | or that you’re still writing christmas letters. | 还是你如今还在写圣诞贺信的事 |
| [08:07] | People like my christmas letters. | 大家都爱看我的圣诞贺信 |
| [08:10] | Look, this city is our secret. | 听着 这里是我们的秘密基地 |
| [08:11] | Now what if she tells other women? | 要是她到处去张扬怎么办 |
| [08:13] | Cleveland will be overrun with desperate refugees from Beverly Hills, | 克利夫兰会挤满了从比弗利山庄赶来的绝望难民 |
| [08:16] | and then it really will be the valley. | 到时候就真变成圣费尔南多谷了 |
| [08:20] | We’ve got to get her out of here | 我们必须把她送走 |
| [08:21] | before she becomes completely intoxicated with the magic of Cleveland. | 要赶在她被克利夫兰的魔力彻底迷醉前 |
| [08:25] | Okay, but you do have to drive her to the airport, | 好吧 不过你得负责把她送去机场 |
| [08:27] | because it’s karaoke night, | 今晚是K歌之夜 |
| [08:28] | and my fans will be disappointed if I don’t sing “wonderwall.” | 我的粉丝们没听到我唱《迷墙》会失望的 |
| [08:31] | It’s kind of my jam. | 那首歌可是我最爱 |
| [08:35] | Seven men just offered to buy me a drink. | 七个男人想请我喝一杯 |
| [08:38] | But the bartender wouldn’t serve me | 可酒保要看我的身份证 |
| [08:40] | until I showed him my I.D., | 证明我年满21才行 |
| [08:41] | which I refused to do because it would break the spell. | 我拒绝了 看完之后我的魔力就失效了 |
| [08:44] | So now one of you have to go get me a drink. | 现在你们谁去帮我拿杯酒来吧 |
| [08:45] | Oh, no, we can’t, | 不行 做不到 |
| [08:46] | because we have to get you to the airport as soon as possible. | 我们还得尽快载你去机场呢 |
| [08:47] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [08:49] | They moved your flight up. | 你的航班提前了 |
| [08:51] | Flights don’t get moved up. | 航班只会延迟 |
| [08:52] | Until now. | 直到今天 |
| [08:53] | Everyone but you got there early, | 除了你 其他乘客都到齐了 |
| [08:55] | and they said, “oh, let’s do it.” | 于是他们说 那就提前飞吧 |
| [08:58] | Who cares if I miss it? | 错过就错过吧 |
| [08:59] | They love me here. | 在这里人人都爱我 |
| [09:01] | There’s no way I’m getting on a plane tonight. | 今晚我打死也不上飞机了 |
| [09:07] | Oh, my God, I feel a frown breaking through. | 天呐 我听见了眉头皱纹裂开的声音 |
| [09:19] | Thank you, Cleveland. | 感谢你们 克利夫兰 |
| [09:22] | Okay, okay, everyone settle down, | 好了好了 各位安静一下 |
| [09:23] | settle down. Time for results. | 安静一下 到揭晓结果的时刻了 |
| [09:26] | First place-no surprise here-goes to… | 第一名得主就是当之无愧的 |
| [09:29] | Courtney Price. | 柯特妮·普莱斯 |
| [09:35] | Second place goes to… Cleveland Browns | 获得第二名的是刚才进来问路 |
| [09:37] | star kick return specialist- this man just came in | 然后留下高歌一曲《迎风展翅》的 |
| [09:40] | to ask for directions, and stayed to sing | 克利夫兰布朗队球星 |
| [09:41] | “Wind beneath my wings”- Josh Cribbs! | 回攻专家 乔希·克里布斯 |
| [09:48] | And third place goes to Joy Hoggs. | 第三名是乔依·霍格 |
| [09:50] | That’s “Scroggs.” | 是斯克罗格 |
| [09:56] | I can’t believe I lost. | 真不敢相信我输了 |
| [09:58] | Hey, I’m bummed too. | 我也很郁闷啊 |
| [09:59] | I have two passions in life- football and karaoke. | 我这人就两大爱好 橄榄球和唱K |
| [10:03] | Fortunately for me, one of them pays really well. | 好在其中一样待遇优厚 |
| [10:07] | It’s football. | 是说橄榄球 |
| [10:10] | Thank you, everybody. | 多谢各位 |
| [10:11] | And don’t worry, I’ll be back next week | 别担心哦 下礼拜我还会来 |
| [10:13] | to defend my title because… | 捍卫我的荣誉 因为 |
| [10:16] | I’m moving to Cleveland! | 我决定搬到克利夫兰来 |
| [10:21] | Courtney! Courtney! Courtney! | 柯特妮 柯特妮 柯特妮 |
| [10:27] | Thank you for supporting the cause. | 谢谢你们来支持我的伟大事业 |
| [10:30] | To be perfectly honest, | 说实话 |
| [10:31] | we wanted an excuse to get away from Courtney. | 我们也是想找借口躲开柯特妮 |
| [10:33] | She’s so superficial and shallow, | 她超级肤浅 |
| [10:35] | and all about how men respond to her appearance. | 就关心男人对她的外貌产生的反应 |
| [10:38] | Yeah, don’t you just hate women like that? | 是啊 这种女人就是讨人厌对吧 |
| [10:44] | So how come you like this tree so much? | 你怎么就这么喜欢这棵树呢 |
| [10:46] | I’ve been walking past it for 60 years. | 我从它身边走过都有60年了 |
| [10:49] | Oh, if it gets cut down, | 要是把它砍了 |
| [10:51] | it would be like losing a friend. | 就像失去了一个朋友一样 |
| [10:54] | A real friend, not a gateway friend. | 真正的朋友 不是你们那种后门朋友 |
| [10:57] | Turns out our gateway friend’s | 看来我们这个后门朋友 |
| [10:58] | gonna be our new neighbor friend. | 马上要成为邻居好友了 |
| [10:59] | Courtney’s staying in Cleveland. | 柯特妮打算留在克利夫兰了 |
| [11:01] | And if we can’t get her back to l.a., | 我们要是不能把她弄回洛杉矶去 |
| [11:02] | there is no chance she can reconcile with Dr. Minton. | 她和明顿医生可就没戏了 |
| [11:06] | Isn’t this where you three knuckleheads | 你们三个笨蛋 |
| [11:08] | come up with some harebrained scheme, | 想出这么个蠢计划 |
| [11:09] | and I tell you it’s stupid, and you do it anyway? | 我一早说了不管用 你们还是这么干了 |
| [11:13] | Way ahead of you. Smile. | 早有对策了 微笑 |
| [11:18] | Dr. Minton, thank you so much for coming. | 明顿医生 多谢你赶来 |
| [11:19] | I flew out as soon as I saw that picture of Victoria. | 一看到维多利亚那张照片我就飞来了 |
| [11:22] | – Where is she? – I’m right here. | -她在哪呢 -在这儿呢 |
| [11:27] | Victoria! | 维多利亚 |
| [11:29] | What did you do to your face? | 你对自己的脸做了什么啊 |
| [11:31] | Did you get it wet? | 是弄湿了吗 |
| [11:34] | You know my treatments are not FDA approved. | 你知道我的手术是未经药管局批准的 |
| [11:37] | They’re not? | 没批吗 |
| [11:40] | – When did this happen? – Overnight. | -什么时候成这样的 -昨晚上 |
| [11:43] | Like in that Lifetime original movie | 就跟那部生活台的原创电影里 |
| [11:45] | where I switch bodies with Hilary Duff | 我和希拉里·达芙互换身体一样 |
| [11:48] | called Switcheroo Summer. | 那电影叫《夏日上错身》 |
| [11:52] | I’m ruined. | 我算是毁了 |
| [11:53] | You’re ruined? | 你毁了 |
| [11:55] | I have a callback tomorrow on C.S.I. Miami. | 《犯罪现场调查:迈阿密篇》还让我明天再去试镜呢 |
| [12:01] | C.S.I. Miami is on hiatus. | 《犯罪现场调查:迈阿密篇》不播了啊 |
| [12:04] | You’re not Victoria. Who are you? | 你不是维多利亚 你到底是谁 |
| [12:07] | I told you not to go off-book. | 我都叫你别胡乱发挥了 |
| [12:10] | And I told you I don’t know what that means. | 都跟你说我不知道那是啥意思了 |
| [12:16] | What is going on? | 是怎么个情况 |
| [12:17] | Look, we brought you here to talk about Courtney. | 我们叫你来是要谈谈柯特妮的事 |
| [12:19] | Now don’t you still love her? | 你应该还爱她吧 |
| [12:21] | I do, truly. I always will, but… | 我爱她 真心的 会一直爱她 但… |
| [12:24] | I’m not ready to settle down. I’m only 65. | 我还不想成家 我才65呢 |
| [12:29] | You’re 65? | 你已经65岁了 |
| [12:32] | I’m very good at what I do. | 我在美容方面可是有一手的 |
| [12:34] | But at your age, | 不过像你这种年纪 |
| [12:35] | can you really continue this Peter Pan lifestyle? | 真的还能继续这种彼得·潘的生活方式吗 |
| [12:38] | Well, I’m in my 60s, | 虽说我60多了 |
| [12:39] | but thanks to hair plugs and extensive plastic surgery, | 但多亏植发和全面整容手术 |
| [12:41] | I could pass for 38. | 说我38都有人信 |
| [12:43] | If you factor in that I’m a doctor, | 我还是个医生 |
| [12:44] | you can knock off another ten years, | 这就又能减掉10岁 |
| [12:46] | bringing me down to 28. | 这样就是28 |
| [12:47] | I drive a porsche, which knocks off another five years, | 我开的是保时捷 再减5岁 |
| [12:49] | minus two more because it’s a convertible. | 还是敞篷的 又能减2岁 |
| [12:52] | When you do the math, I’m barely old enough to drink. | 算一算 我就勉强到法定饮酒年龄呢 |
| [12:58] | – Courtney? – Dr. Minton? | -柯特妮 -明顿医生 |
| [13:00] | – Josh Cribbs? – Dr. Minton? | -乔希·克里布斯 -明顿医生 |
| [13:04] | I thought you said he was dead. | 你不是说他死了吗 |
| [13:05] | He is to me. | 对我来说是啊 |
| [13:08] | Cribbs. | 克里布斯 |
| [13:09] | What the hell, man? | 你怎么搞的啊 |
| [13:11] | I had you on my fantasy team, | 我的梦幻团队里面可选了你 |
| [13:13] | you went out with a groin injury in the Steelers game. | 和钢人队那场你因为腹股沟受伤下场了 |
| [13:15] | You really wrecked my whole season. | 整个赛季都被你搞砸了 |
| [13:17] | Well, that must’ve been painful for you. | 那你真是受苦了啊 |
| [13:19] | Almost as painful as a groin injury. | 快赶上腹股沟受伤的痛苦了吧 |
| [13:23] | What are you doing here? | 你来干什么 |
| [13:24] | I came to see Victoria, | 我来找维多利亚 |
| [13:26] | but now that I see you, I- | 但看到你才发现 |
| [13:28] | I really miss you, Courtney. | 我真的很想你 柯特妮 |
| [13:30] | Enough to marry me? | 想我到愿意娶我吗 |
| [13:32] | Maybe. Someday. Not yet. | 也许 某一天 但不是现在 |
| [13:36] | Well, fine, I’ll just marry Josh Cribbs. | 那行 我嫁给乔希·克里布斯好了 |
| [13:37] | Wait, what? | 等等 什么 |
| [13:39] | Okay, this is getting a little too weird for me. | 这有点太怪了 我消受不起 |
| [13:42] | Good night, everyone. | 先闪了 各位 |
| [13:43] | I think what that large football man is trying to tell us is that | 我觉得刚才那个玩橄榄球的大个子是想告诉我们 |
| [13:47] | you two obviously belong together. | 你们明显是天生一对啊 |
| [13:50] | You know, he’s right. | 他说得没错 |
| [13:52] | Come on, baby, let’s go back to the way things were. | 宝贝 我们回到以前那样吧 |
| [13:54] | Why should I? | 我为何要那么傻 |
| [13:55] | In L.A., a woman my age has to take whatever she can get. | 在洛杉矶 我这年纪的女人可没什么选择权 |
| [13:58] | But here in Cleveland, I can get whatever I want | 在克利夫兰 选择权全部在我手上 |
| [14:00] | and whomever I want. | 想选谁就能选谁 |
| [14:01] | I don’t have to date a 65-year-old senior citizen. | 我用不着和一个65岁的老年人交往啊 |
| [14:06] | Are you really going to play the age card, | 你还真想拿年龄说事啊 |
| [14:08] | Miss born in 1960- | 60年代出生的小姐 |
| [14:13] | Well, the joke is on you. | 闹笑话的是你 |
| [14:16] | You forgot that I lost all feeling in my cheeks | 你忘了 自从上次植皮手术之后 |
| [14:18] | after my last skin graft. | 我两颊就没感觉了 |
| [14:21] | I literally have the face of a man half my age. | 我这张脸还真是个30来岁男人的脸 |
| [14:25] | Genius. | 天才 |
| [14:32] | Dr. Minton. | 明顿医生 |
| [14:33] | What are you doing here? | 你怎么会跑来这里 |
| [14:34] | I was on my way to the airport, | 我本来都在去机场的路上了 |
| [14:36] | but I turned around because I couldn’t stop thinking about your face. | 又掉头回来 因为我总是想起你的面容 |
| [14:41] | Oh, I get that a lot. | 好多人都这么说 |
| [14:43] | I was drawn to it, | 我完全沉迷其中了 |
| [14:44] | and I couldn’t figure out why, | 我刚开始还不知道原因 |
| [14:46] | but now I remember. You… | 不过现在想起来了 你… |
| [14:48] | You look like my grandmother. | 你长得像我奶奶 |
| [14:51] | Before she made me make her look young | 是像我给她整容前的模样 |
| [14:54] | and she started dressing like Kesha. | 她现在打扮得和钱妞凯莎一样新潮 |
| [14:57] | I’m proud of my wrinkles. | 皱纹就是我的军功章 |
| [15:00] | I earned every line. | 每一道都是用血泪换来的 |
| [15:02] | Just like this gnarled old tree. | 就像这棵饱经风霜的老树 |
| [15:05] | It’s a beautiful tree. | 这棵树真有古韵 |
| [15:06] | In Los Angeles, our trees are cell phone towers. | 在洛杉矶 手机信号塔就是我们的树 |
| [15:11] | There’s beauty in things that are naturally old. | 自然衰老的东西有一种美感 |
| [15:14] | That’s why I wanna protect it. | 所以我才想保护它 |
| [15:16] | Ah, I can see why. | 我懂了 |
| [15:19] | Although I would shave off a few of these limbs for symmetry. | 不过我会砍掉几根多余的树枝以达到对称性 |
| [15:23] | Maybe take this bump out, make it look less ethnic. | 把这块突起也给去掉 使其更贴近大众风格 |
| [15:28] | Sorry. Habit. | 抱歉 职业病 |
| [15:30] | You and that tiny girl back at my house | 你和住在我家的那个拇指姑娘 |
| [15:33] | are perfect for each other. | 倒是天生一对 |
| [15:35] | What’s the story there? | 你们俩什么情况 |
| [15:36] | I love Courtney. | 我爱柯特妮 |
| [15:37] | She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. | 她是我生命中最美丽的存在 |
| [15:40] | Well, then, why don’t you marry her? | 那你为什么不娶她 |
| [15:41] | I’m too young to get married. | 我现在太年轻 还属于早婚 |
| [15:44] | Not growing up is not the same as being young. | 长不大并不代表年轻 |
| [15:48] | I hear what you’re saying. | 我懂你的意思 |
| [15:50] | But a leopard can’t change its spots. | 但是江山易改本性难移 |
| [15:53] | It can | 本性可以改 |
| [15:54] | if it finds the tiny leopard it wants to change for. | 只要找到那个让你想为之改变的人 |
| [15:57] | Wow, you don’t give up, do you? | 你还真是锲而不舍啊 |
| [16:00] | Now you really remind me of my grandmother. | 你这点和我奶奶简直如出一辙 |
| [16:02] | Minus the miniskirt and the body glitter. | 不过她穿的是迷你裙 身上还涂了亮粉 |
| [16:07] | I’ve got a flight to catch. | 我还要赶飞机 |
| [16:08] | Oh, are you okay? | 你没事吧 |
| [16:10] | Yeah, this old oak really pumps out the oxygen, doesn’t it? | 天呐 这棵老橡树制造喷出的氧气还真令人头晕目眩 |
| [16:20] | Courtney. | 柯特妮 |
| [16:21] | Dr. Minton. | 明顿医生 |
| [16:23] | Oh, what happened? | 你这是怎么搞的呀 |
| [16:25] | He fell out of my tree. | 他从我那棵树上跌下来了 |
| [16:28] | Why didn’t you tell us? | 你怎么不告诉我们啊 |
| [16:29] | I told her not to. | 是我让她别说的 |
| [16:30] | I couldn’t think of a way to make it come off sexy. | 从树上摔下来这种事 怎么说都不够帅气 |
| [16:34] | – You okay? – Yeah, I’m fine. | -你没事吧 -我没事 |
| [16:36] | But at the hospital, they made me give my real age. | 不过在医院 他们逼我报真实年龄 |
| [16:39] | That plus some stuff Elka said to me got me thinking. | 再加上爱尔卡对我的谆谆教导 我开始反思 |
| [16:42] | Well, she’s done a lot of living in her 110 years. | 她活了110岁 也算是老江湖了 |
| [16:46] | I’m 90. | 我才90岁好吧 |
| [16:47] | Of course you are. | 你说几岁就几岁吧 |
| [16:51] | The reason I’ve tried to stay young | 我之所以想永葆青春 |
| [16:53] | was so that I would have enough time to find the perfect woman. | 是为了给自己争取时间 找到完美的另一半 |
| [16:56] | But now I realize | 不过我现在顿悟了 |
| [16:57] | that the person I have been searching for all this time | 我一直在苦心寻找的真命天女 |
| [17:00] | was just outside my office door. | 就坐在我办公室门口 |
| [17:04] | Why are you three gushing? | 你们三只花痴”哦”啥呢 |
| [17:06] | That line is from every romantic comedy ever. | 这句俗烂台词每部浪漫喜剧里必出现 |
| [17:11] | We’re from Hollywood, | 我们是从好莱坞来的 |
| [17:11] | where originality is frowned upon. | 对独创性这种东西向来鄙视 |
| [17:15] | Courtney… | 柯特妮 |
| [17:18] | Will you marry me? | 你愿意嫁给我吗 |
| [17:20] | Yes. | 我愿意 |
| [17:22] | Aw, she makes him want to be a better man. | 真好 她让他想成为一个更好的男人 |
| [17:24] | He had her at “hello.” | 她对他一见倾心 |
| [17:28] | I weep for your generation. | 我真替你们这辈人感到悲哀 |
| [17:31] | Any ideas on a date yet? | 你们想把大喜日子定在什么时候 |
| [17:33] | We’re due back in L.A. in six months for our follow-up appointments. | 我们半年之后要回洛杉矶 做后续治疗 |
| [17:35] | Well, by that time, I wanna be married to Courtney, | 到那时候 我希望已经和柯特妮完婚 |
| [17:37] | living in Cleveland and complaining | 在克利夫兰定居 |
| [17:38] | – about the Indians’ bullpen. – What? | -吐槽印第安人队的候补阵容 -什么 |
| [17:40] | That is, if it’s okay with you. | 当然前提是你愿意 |
| [17:43] | Of course. I don’t care where we live, | 我当然愿意 我不在乎住在哪座城市 |
| [17:45] | as long as I’m Mrs. Dr. Minton. | 只要能做你的新娘就好 |
| [17:48] | There are little puffs of air coming out of her eyes. | 有细小的气流从她眼睛里往外喷 |
| [17:52] | I’m crying. | 我这是在流泪啊 |
| [17:55] | So are you really gonna move to Cleveland? | 你们当真要搬来克利夫兰吗 |
| [17:56] | Oh, yeah, I’m gonna outbid the day SPA people, | 对啊 我要出高价压过那家日间水疗馆 |
| [17:58] | build an office on that lot, and keep the old oak. | 在那里盖间办公室 保留那棵老橡树 |
| [18:01] | Oh, thank you. | 谢谢你了 |
| [18:03] | This is fabulous. | 这真是太棒了 |
| [18:04] | So we lose a day SPA, | 虽说日间水疗泡汤了 |
| [18:05] | but we gain a celebrity dermatologist. | 但却收获了一枚明星御用皮肤科医生 |
| [18:08] | Oh, no, I’m not gonna practice the vanity arts in Cleveland. | 我可没打算在克利夫兰搞面子工程 |
| [18:11] | – What? – Are you kidding me? | -你说什么 -开什么国际玩笑 |
| [18:14] | I wanna focus on real dermatological problems | 我要专注钻研真正的皮肤病问题 |
| [18:16] | like ringworm and psoriasis. | 比如癣菌病和牛皮癣 |
| [18:18] | No more silly fountain of youth stuff. | 不再搞长生不老那套蠢招了 |
| [18:21] | You’re still gonna do me, right? | 你还是会帮我整吧 |
| [18:22] | Well, yeah, of course. I have to have a hot wife. | 那当然了 我老婆必须火辣性感 |
| [18:26] | Dr. Minton. | 明顿医生 |
| [18:28] | Besides, | 再说了 |
| [18:30] | they were this close to shutting down my clinic in L.A. | 我在洛杉矶的那家诊所 就快被查封了 |
| [18:34] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [18:35] | No reason. | 无缘无故 |
| [18:41] | Okay, well, I’ve done my research. | 我已经研究过了 |
| [18:42] | And there are a number of places | 在克利夫兰有不少地方 |
| [18:44] | we can get our botox done here in Cleveland. | 可以打肉毒杆菌 |
| [18:46] | In fact, there’s one here where we can use a groupon. | 而且其中一家还可以用团购券 |
| [18:48] | Groupon botox, Melanie? | 团购肉毒杆菌 梅兰妮 |
| [18:51] | Has it come to that? | 我们沦落到这种地步了吗 |
| [18:52] | Even my pathetic friend, Joy– | 就连我那个悲催的朋友乔依 |
| [18:53] | not you, Joy- wouldn’t stoop that low. | 不是你 乔依 都不会堕落到那个地步 |
| [18:58] | Well, I guess we could just accept life as it comes. | 那我们就接受生命天然的馈赠吧 |
| [19:00] | What, age naturally? | 什么 自然衰老吗 |
| [19:02] | We’ve never thought about that. | 这我们还从来没考虑过 |
| [19:04] | We could give it a try. | 可以试试嘛 |
| [19:08] | I have a major announcement to make. | 我有个重大消息要宣布 |
| [19:11] | We have been botox-free for three years. | 我们已经三年没打肉毒杆菌素了 |
| [19:26] | On second thought, Cleveland botox doesn’t sound that bad. | 仔细一想 在克利夫兰打肉毒杆菌也不至于太掉价 |
| [19:29] | Print that groupon, Melanie, print it. | 把那张团购券打印出来 梅兰妮 快打印 |
| [19:32] | – Done and done. – To fighting nature. | -搞定啦 -抵御岁月杀猪刀 |
| [19:34] | – Fighting nature. – Fighting nature. | -抵御岁月杀猪刀 -抵御岁月杀猪刀 |