| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:09] | Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience. | 《燃情克利夫兰》是在摄影棚观众前现场录制的 |
| [00:14] | Aw, damn it. | 真要命 |
| [00:16] | This guy I’m playing Words with Friends with is killing me. | 和我一起玩猜字游戏的这家伙折磨死我了 |
| [00:18] | Who is it? | 是谁啊 |
| [00:19] | I don’t know. | 我不认识 |
| [00:20] | But as a detective, I’ve cobbled together a profile. | 但身为一名侦探 我已经完成了对他的侧写 |
| [00:23] | Mid-40s, foul-mouthed, and extremely intelligent. | 45岁左右 满嘴脏话 聪明绝顶 |
| [00:27] | He’s beat me 20 times in a row. | 他已经连赢我20回合了 |
| [00:29] | Let’s make it 21. | 马上就赢第21回合了 |
| [00:35] | Well, smartass 93-year-old was my second guess. | 我第二个猜测 就是对方是一位93岁的牛逼老太 |
| [00:40] | Elka, we should play. | 爱尔卡 我们应该一起玩 |
| [00:41] | I’m really good at Scrabble. | 我很擅长拼字游戏的 |
| [00:42] | You know what my nickname was in high school? | 你猜我高中时候的外号叫什么 |
| [00:44] | Pizza face? | 大饼脸吗 |
| [00:46] | Back brace? Four eyes? | 牙套妹还是四眼田鸡 |
| [00:49] | Yes. | 没错 |
| [00:51] | But it was also Word Nerd. | 但还有个外号叫「字痴」 |
| [00:54] | While everyone else was drinking and dancing at the prom, | 当其他人都在舞会上喝酒跳舞的时候 |
| [00:56] | I was at home playing Scrabble. | 而我却在家里玩拼字游戏 |
| [00:59] | With my mom. | 和我妈妈一起 |
| [01:01] | Okay, everybody. | 好了 各位 |
| [01:02] | You can play your games, | 你们可以一起玩游戏 |
| [01:03] | but let’s keep the competition at a friendly level. | 但是友谊第一 比赛第二 |
| [01:06] | Remember, Wilbur’s staying with us this week. | 记住 威尔伯这周会和我们一起住 |
| [01:08] | Oh, I love when your grandson comes to stay. | 我超高兴你孙子过来住 |
| [01:10] | He is such a sweet little boy. | 他是个可爱的小男孩儿 |
| [01:11] | Yeah, he reminds me of myself at that age | 是啊 他让我想起那个年纪的我 |
| [01:13] | back in Canada. | 那时我在加拿大 |
| [01:15] | You know, if he plays his cards right, | 如果他的路子走得对的话 |
| [01:16] | he too may one day be captain of the high school | 或许有一天他也能成为高中 |
| [01:19] | maple tapping team. | 枫树修剪队队长 |
| [01:20] | Have his pick. | 任由他选 |
| [01:21] | – Of the girls? – No, of the trees. | -选女孩子吗 -不是 选枫树 |
| [01:26] | Well, enough of my glory days. | 好了 不再说我的光辉岁月了 |
| [01:29] | We still have to figure out our presentation for tomorrow. | 我们还得准备明天的演讲内容 |
| [01:32] | It’s career day at Wilbur’s school. | 明天是威尔伯学校的职业日 |
| [01:33] | Bob and I are gonna talk about being detectives. | 我和鲍勃打算谈谈侦探这个职业 |
| [01:36] | Shall we head back to the office? | 我们一起回办公室吗 |
| [01:37] | No, you go. I was gonna stop by that place. | 不 你回吧 我准备去趟那个地方 |
| [01:39] | Oh, pick me up a thing. | 给我带样东西回来 |
| [01:40] | Yeah, but not the one with the stuff. | 好啊 不过不能带有那个的玩意儿 |
| [01:42] | Ha! No, what a mess. | 哈哈 不要 太糟糕了 |
| [01:43] | Yeah. | 是呢 |
| [01:44] | – Bye. – Bye. | -再见 -再见 |
| [01:47] | You and Bob almost seem like a couple. | 你和鲍勃看起来简直像夫妻 |
| [01:49] | What? No. | 什么 乱讲 |
| [01:50] | I mean, Bob is great, but that special something is missing. | 鲍勃是很好 但就是没有那种来电的感觉 |
| [01:55] | You know how when you love someone, | 你了解那种爱一个人时的感觉吧 |
| [01:56] | there’s sort of a glow about them? | 就好像那个人身上闪着耀眼的光芒 |
| [01:58] | An aura? | 像有个光环 |
| [01:59] | Yeah. I want a guy that glows too. | 没错 我也想有个闪着光芒的爱人 |
| [02:02] | I had a guy who glowed. | 我曾有个闪闪发光的爱人 |
| [02:04] | Sinatra. | 歌王辛纳屈 |
| [02:07] | Can you get through one day without mentioning | 你有哪一天可以不提 |
| [02:09] | that you slept with Sinatra? | 你跟辛纳屈睡过的事吗 |
| [02:11] | I can. But I won’t. | 可以 但我不愿意 |
| [02:16] | Hello, all. | 大家好 |
| [02:17] | Oh, cute outfit. | 这身行头真漂亮 |
| [02:19] | We went outdoor spinning. | 我们去户外骑动感单车了 |
| [02:20] | You mean biking? | 你是说骑自行车 |
| [02:21] | Don’t make it sound cheap. | 别说得那么掉价 |
| [02:23] | – You remember Barney. – Hi, everyone. | -你们记得巴尼吧 -大家好 |
| [02:26] | Vic, I’m gonna go fill up our water bottles. | 小维 我去把水壶装满 |
| [02:28] | – Oh, that is so sweet. – This woman is awesome. | -真是太贴心了 -这个女人超赞的 |
| [02:34] | Is he a friend of Wilbur’s? | 他是威尔伯的小伙伴吗 |
| [02:38] | You make your jokes, but dating a younger man is fantastic. | 你随便开玩笑 和小鲜肉约会的感觉太棒了 |
| [02:43] | You know, coming to Cleveland took a few years off me. | 来到克利夫兰 就让我年轻了几岁 |
| [02:45] | And winning an Oscar took a few more years off me. | 而赢得奥斯卡奖又让我年轻了好几岁 |
| [02:48] | If I win a Grammy, I could go to prom. | 要是能赢格莱美奖 我简直能参加高中舞会 |
| [02:52] | Or stay home and play Scrabble ’cause that’s a fun night too. | 或宅在家里玩拼字游戏 也算个美妙之夜 |
| [02:58] | Hey, babe. It is so beautiful outside. | 宝贝 外面景色如此美丽 |
| [03:00] | What if we kept going and biked the lake route? | 我们继续骑怎么样 沿湖骑行 |
| [03:03] | Unless you’re not up for it. | 除非你不想去 |
| [03:04] | Oh, no, I’m totally up for it. | 不 我非常想去 |
| [03:06] | No, I’ll–I’ll meet you out there. | 好啦 我一会儿出去找你 |
| [03:08] | – Bye. – Bye. | -再见 -再见 |
| [03:13] | What are you waiting for? | 你还等什么啊 |
| [03:14] | Uh, my very young-looking legs seem to have seized up a little. | 我这外观年轻的双腿有点儿累残了 |
| [03:34] | Finally. George Clooney is starving. | 可回来了 乔治·克鲁尼都要饿死了 |
| [03:37] | I’m sorry, George. | 对不起 乔治 |
| [03:38] | I have your Cesar Savory Delights. | 我给你买了西莎狗罐头 |
| [03:42] | I think he has a little crush on the dog on the package. | 我觉得它看上了包装上印的那只狗 |
| [03:45] | Looks like a boy dog. | 看起来是只公狗 |
| [03:47] | Don’t judge, Melanie. | 不要评判狗搅基 梅兰妮 |
| [03:51] | Okay, Word Nerd. It’s your turn. | 好了 该「字痴」出招了 |
| [03:53] | Oh, I have a really good word too. | 我想到一个绝妙的词 |
| [03:55] | Kahlua. | 咖啡酒 |
| [03:55] | Oh, I also have a really good recipe for Kahlua. | 我还想到一个调咖啡酒的妙方 |
| [03:58] | Then why are we playing this stupid game? | 那我们为什么还在玩这个蠢游戏 |
| [04:02] | Well, I hate to admit it, | 我真是不愿意承认 |
| [04:03] | but Barney might be wearing me out. | 但是 巴尼有点让我精疲力尽了 |
| [04:07] | Really? What’d you do last night? | 是吗 你们昨晚都”干”什么了 |
| [04:09] | Ugh, we went to a midnight movie and then dinner after. | 我们看了场午夜电影 之后又去吃饭 |
| [04:12] | I was so tired when the meal came, | 饭菜上桌时 我太累了 |
| [04:14] | I might accidentally have eaten it. | 我或许不小心真吃了一些 |
| [04:18] | Is there a food called nachos, or was I dreaming? | 有种食物叫玉米脆饼吗 还是当时我在做梦 |
| [04:22] | Victoria, maybe it’s time to admit that he’s maybe | 维多利亚 也许是时候承认他也许 |
| [04:26] | too young or you’re maybe too… | 太年轻了 或者你也许太… |
| [04:27] | Bup, bup, bup, bup… I cannot hear the end of that sentence. | 打住 打住 我听不到你最后的几个词 |
| [04:30] | Well, when you get old, your hearing goes too. | 是啊 人一老 听力也会变差 |
| [04:35] | Well, would a person who is old be going to meet her boyfriend | 会有哪个老年人准备和她的男朋友 |
| [04:38] | to play laser tag? | 去玩激光枪战呢 |
| [04:40] | Oh, fxxk my life. | 操蛋的人生啊 |
| [04:46] | So you see, kids, our detective agency | 所以说 孩子们 我们的侦探事务所 |
| [04:48] | specializes in cases of… | 十分擅长调查… |
| [04:51] | Infidelity. | 婚外情案件 |
| [04:54] | And this woman here is the best honey trap in the business. | 而这位女士是业内最擅长使用美人计的 |
| [04:58] | Bob. | 鲍勃 |
| [04:59] | Grandma? What’s a honey trap? | 奶奶 什么是美人计 |
| [05:02] | Wilbur, let me explain. | 威尔伯 让我解释下 |
| [05:07] | Say you’re a man and you have a cookie. | 假设你是个男人 有块饼干 |
| [05:09] | And you’ve had that cookie for a while. | 你占有那块饼干已经有段时间了 |
| [05:12] | And it’s just not making your mouth water anymore. | 而它已经不能再让你馋得流口水了 |
| [05:14] | It’s become dried up and…unappetizing. | 它变得干了 令人没胃口了 |
| [05:20] | That doesn’t happen to all cookies. | 但并非所有饼干都会如此 |
| [05:22] | Some retain their gooey freshness. | 有些饼干能保持新鲜甜美 |
| [05:25] | Oh, yes, they do. | 没错 的确如此 |
| [05:29] | Anyway, kids, you go looking for a new cookie, | 总之 孩子们 你们会开始找一块新的饼干 |
| [05:33] | your old cookie may get upset, | 你的老饼干可能会很生气 |
| [05:35] | and hire us. | 就雇佣我们 |
| [05:36] | And the original cookie might get a new car in the divorce. | 最初那块饼干在离婚后可能会得到一辆新车 |
| [05:41] | That’s right, Mrs. Johnson. | 解释得好 约翰逊太太 |
| [05:42] | It’s Miss O’Roarke now. | 现在是奥洛克小姐了 |
| [05:45] | Are you two married? | 你们两个是夫妻吗 |
| [05:47] | Well, that’s an interesting question. | 那真是个有意思的问题 |
| [05:48] | Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. | 不是 不是 不是 |
| [05:50] | No, uh, we’re colleagues. | 不 我们是同事 |
| [05:51] | I’m Wilbur’s grandmother, and Bob is Wilbur’s… Bob. | 我是威尔伯的奶奶 鲍勃是威尔伯的 鲍勃 |
| [05:56] | It’s true. I am his Bob. | 没错 我是他的鲍勃 |
| [06:00] | Okay, boys and girls. Time to retrieve your lunches. | 好了孩子们 到吃午饭的时间了 |
| [06:04] | Thank you for coming in today, Mr. Moore and Ms. Scroggs. | 谢谢你们今天过来 穆尔先生 斯克罗格女士 |
| [06:17] | – Here we go. – Ah, thank you. | -美食来啦 -谢谢 |
| [06:20] | You guys make the cutest family. | 你们三个真是吉祥的一家 |
| [06:22] | Oh, we’re not a family. | 我们不是一家子 |
| [06:24] | I mean, Wilbur and I are related, but Bob is my boss. | 威尔伯和我是一家人 但鲍勃是我老板 |
| [06:27] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [06:28] | Like Colin Firth and his Portuguese housekeeper in Love Actually. | 就像《真爱至上》里科林·菲斯和他的葡萄牙管家一样 |
| [06:32] | Or Hugh Grant and his assistant, also in Love Actually. | 或者是《真爱至上》中休·格兰特和他的助理 |
| [06:36] | A lot of people end up falling in love with their bosses. | 很多人最后都会爱上自己的老板 |
| [06:39] | That was the message of that movie. | 这就是那部影片传递的信息 |
| [06:43] | So, Wilbur, I saw a big kid step on your lunch. | 威尔伯 我之前看见有个大孩子踩烂你的午饭 |
| [06:47] | That’s Aiden. He does it every day. | 那是艾登 他每天都这么对我 |
| [06:50] | I didn’t see that. Wilbur, why didn’t you tell me? | 我没看到那一幕啊 威尔伯 你怎么没告诉我 |
| [06:52] | ‘Cause big boys don’t like to be tattletales, | 因为大男孩不喜欢当告密的小人 |
| [06:55] | do they, Wilbur? | 对吧 威尔伯 |
| [06:56] | Yeah. Sometimes he pushes me down. | 是的 有时他会把我推倒 |
| [07:00] | You know, if I taught you a little karate, | 话说 如果我教你一点空手道 |
| [07:02] | you could fight back if you had to. | 在必要的时候你就可以反击了 |
| [07:04] | Or you could talk to Aiden and tell him | 或者你可以跟艾登谈谈 告诉他 |
| [07:06] | you don’t like being pushed | 你不喜欢被推 |
| [07:07] | because fighting doesn’t solve things. | 因为打架并不能解决问题 |
| [07:10] | Hey, cutie. | 嘿 小帅哥 |
| [07:11] | Do you want to see the machine that made your milkshake? | 你想看看制造奶昔的机器吗 |
| [07:13] | Yeah. | 好啊 |
| [07:15] | Bob? | 鲍勃 |
| [07:19] | You know what? I’m gonna talk to Melanie. | 好了 我打算去找梅兰妮谈谈 |
| [07:21] | She did conflict resolution at her kids’ school in LA. | 在洛杉矶时 她在她孩子的学校做过冲突解决研究 |
| [07:24] | She’ll know what to do. | 她会知道该怎么处理的 |
| [07:25] | Bullies don’t speak conflict resolution. | 恶霸可不管什么冲突解决 |
| [07:28] | You’ve got to talk to them in the only language they understand. | 你只能用他们唯一理解的语言去跟他们谈 |
| [07:31] | Force. | 就是武力 |
| [07:32] | This may surprise you, but I once knew someone | 说出来可能令你震惊 但我曾经也认识一个 |
| [07:35] | – who was bullied. – It’s you. | -被霸凌的人 -就是你自己 |
| [07:36] | Yes, but that was gonna be the twist ending. | 是的 但那本该是个峰回路转的结尾 |
| [07:40] | I would like to thank Aiden’s parents, Pete and Kim, | 我想感谢艾登的父母 皮特和凯姆 |
| [07:43] | for joining us in conflict resolution. | 加入我们讨论冲突解决问题 |
| [07:46] | We call this the talking stick. | 我们把这个叫做发言棍 |
| [07:48] | The person holding it can share their feelings | 手握发言棍的人可以自由说出自己的感觉 |
| [07:50] | without any fear of judgment. | 而不必担心遭受评判 |
| [07:53] | I’m confused. | 我糊涂了 |
| [07:54] | If that’s the talking stick, what do we call Joy? | 如果那个是发言棍[会说话的棍子] 那乔依是什么 |
| [08:06] | Oh, I’m sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [08:08] | I–I was up until 4 a.m. | 我一直到凌晨4点才睡 |
| [08:10] | You see, I’m dating this guy who’s 20 years younger than I am. | 我正跟一个比我年轻20岁的男人约会 |
| [08:13] | 20 years younger. Really? | 年轻20岁 真的吗 |
| [08:15] | Yeah, he’s 60. | 是啊 他60岁 |
| [08:20] | Elka. | 爱尔卡 |
| [08:21] | I’ve got the stick. I can say what I want. | 我手握发言棍 想说什么说什么 |
| [08:25] | That’s not how the stick works. | 发言棍的作用可不是这样的 |
| [08:28] | Pete, would you like to start off? | 皮特 不如你先开始吧 |
| [08:29] | Sure. | 好的 |
| [08:31] | This whole thing feels like a lot of LA nonsense. | 这整件事让人感觉就是来自洛杉矶的人没事找事 |
| [08:34] | This is just a simple case of boys being boys. | 只是男孩在展现自己的本性而已 |
| [08:37] | Young men have a lot of energy. | 年轻男人精力旺盛 |
| [08:39] | Huh, that’s for damn sure. | 那倒是实话 |
| [08:43] | If you ask me, your son needs to learn right from wrong. | 如果要我说 你们的儿子得学会明辨是非对错 |
| [08:48] | Look who’s preaching morality. | 瞧瞧谁在宣扬道义啊 |
| [08:50] | Aiden told us that | 艾登告诉我们 |
| [08:51] | you trap men into doing things by giving them cookies. | 你会给男人一些甜头 诱惑他们做出一些事 |
| [08:53] | With your legs. | 专用美腿计 |
| [08:57] | Give me that stick. I can explain. | 把发言棍给我 我可以解释的 |
| [08:59] | First off– yes, Joy has amazing legs. | 首先 没错 乔依的腿是很美 |
| [09:03] | Long and shapely and one can only imagine | 又长又有型 让男人无限遐想 |
| [09:05] | what they’d feel like wrapped around one’s shoulders. | 把那双腿架在肩膀上会是什么感觉 |
| [09:12] | Sorry, what was the question? | 不好意思 问题是什么来着 |
| [09:14] | Why does everyone want boys to act like well-behaved little girls? | 为什么大家都希望男孩子表现得像乖乖女一样呢 |
| [09:18] | Pete’s right. | 皮特说得对 |
| [09:19] | I have a purse full of pills | 我已经攒了一钱包的药了 |
| [09:20] | the pediatrician wants me to give Aiden. | 都是儿科医生希望我喂艾登吃的 |
| [09:23] | But I’m not gonna give my kid Adderall. | 但我是不会给我的孩子吃「阿得拉」药的 |
| [09:25] | Adderall, you say? | 你刚刚是说「阿得拉」吗 |
| [09:28] | Isn’t that what college kids take to stay up all night? | 那不是大学生服了来保持整夜不睡的药吗 |
| [09:31] | This is a waste of time. | 这简直是在浪费时间 |
| [09:33] | I say we just let the kids work it out for themselves. | 我看不如让孩子们自己之间解决吧 |
| [09:35] | Oh, so you plan to do nothing? | 所以你们打算袖手旁观吗 |
| [09:37] | You’re happy to just let your evil spawn | 你们乐意看着自己的邪恶之子 |
| [09:39] | continue to bully my grandson? | 继续霸凌我孙子是吧 |
| [09:40] | Let’s go, Pete. | 我们走 皮特 |
| [09:41] | Oh, that’s great. Just walk away. | 好极了 直接扭头走人 |
| [09:44] | Just know that if your little thug lays another hand | 告诉你们 如果你们的无赖儿子再敢 |
| [09:46] | on my sweet grandchild– | 动我可爱的孙子一下 |
| [09:48] | – Control your wife, Bob. – We’re not a couple. | -控制下你的妻子 鲍勃 -我们不是一对 |
| [09:50] | – I’m not his wife. – Not yet. | -我不是他妻子 -暂时不是而已 |
| [09:55] | What are you doing? How is that helpful? | 你在干什么呢 你这样不是在添乱吗 |
| [09:58] | Oh, Joy, calm down. | 乔依 淡定 |
| [10:01] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [10:04] | Did you just ask a woman to calm down? | 你刚刚是让一个女人淡定吗 |
| [10:06] | I don’t remember. I–I don’t think so. | 我不记得了 好像没有吧 |
| [10:14] | Look, I think we should go back to my plan | 听着 我觉得还是得按我的计划来 |
| [10:15] | of Wilbur defending himself. | 让威尔伯学会自卫 |
| [10:16] | I already told you– I don’t want that. | 我已经告诉过你了 我不希望那样 |
| [10:18] | Look, we should just sit down together and talk through this. | 我们应该一起坐下来 好好谈谈这事 |
| [10:20] | But we’re not together. We’re not a couple. | 但我们并没有在一起 我们并不是一对 |
| [10:22] | I can’t make it any more clear. | 我已经说得再清楚不过了 |
| [10:23] | There is no “we,” Bob. | 我们不是一体的 鲍勃 |
| [10:25] | And there never will be. | 将来也不会在一起 |
| [10:30] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [10:33] | But that doesn’t stop me from caring about Wilbur. | 但那也不能阻止我关心威尔伯 |
| [10:35] | That’s sweet. | 这话真贴心 |
| [10:37] | When it comes to us, you have got to move on. | 但至于我们的事 你必须往前看了 |
| [10:42] | I hear you. | 我听明白了 |
| [10:45] | Maybe I ought to head up to Canada for a couple of days. | 或许我得去加拿大待几天 |
| [10:47] | Take some walks in the woods. | 在丛林里散散步 |
| [10:50] | Tap a few trees. | 给一些树装上窃听器 |
| [11:04] | I am much better at Kahlua than I am at Words with Friends. | 我做咖啡酒可比我玩拼词游戏擅长多了 |
| [11:08] | And the great thing about our Kahlua is I don’t feel drunk, | 我们这个咖啡酒最棒的一点在于 我不会觉得醉 |
| [11:11] | because you put extra coffee in it. | 因为你多加了一些咖啡在里面 |
| [11:13] | And I don’t feel wired because we put extra vodka in it. | 我也不觉得过度兴奋 因为多放了伏特加在里面 |
| [11:19] | Oh, poor Wilbur, being bullied. | 可怜的威尔伯 被人霸凌了 |
| [11:21] | You know, I had a bully when I was a kid. | 我小时候也曾被人霸凌过 |
| [11:24] | Kaylin Boosalis. | 凯琳·布萨斯 |
| [11:26] | I had a bully too. Adolf Hitler. | 我曾经也遇到过恶霸 阿道夫·希特勒 |
| [11:31] | You know, I am two Kahluas away from calling that jerk | 我再喝两杯咖啡酒 就要打电话给那个混蛋 |
| [11:34] | and giving her a piece of my mind. | 让她领教下我的厉害了 |
| [11:36] | In gym class, she used to steal the basketball away from me | 当年在体育课上 她会偷走我的篮球 |
| [11:39] | and bounce it off my head. It was the worst. | 然后砸在我的头上 真是太差劲了 |
| [11:42] | Did you not hear me say my bully was Hitler? | 你刚刚没听到我说霸凌我的是希特勒吗 |
| [11:49] | Hey! You’re still up. | 嘿 你们还没睡呢 |
| [11:52] | Victoria, are you just getting back from your date with Barney? | 维多利亚 你刚跟巴尼约会回来吗 |
| [11:55] | Oh, it was great. | 感觉棒极了 |
| [11:56] | We went to see a band, and then we danced, | 我们去看了个乐队表演 跳了舞 |
| [11:57] | and then we walked home instead of taking a cab. | 然后我们一路走回来的 根本没乘车 |
| [12:01] | Where did all this energy come from? | 你怎么突然间能量大爆发了 |
| [12:03] | Oh, Barney makes me feel young. | 巴尼让我感觉自己很年轻 |
| [12:05] | I’m exercising now, so I have my own natural reserves. | 我现在开始锻炼了 所以有自然的能量保留 |
| [12:08] | Plus, I stole Adderall out of that bully mom’s purse. | 并且 我从那个恶霸妈妈的包里偷了「阿得拉」药 |
| [12:12] | What? | 什么 |
| [12:13] | You stole her pills? | 你偷了她的药吗 |
| [12:14] | Honey, that’s not what they’re for. | 亲爱的 那些药的用途可不是这个 |
| [12:16] | Elka, can you believe this? | 爱尔卡 你敢相信这事吗 |
| [12:17] | All I got was a Starbucks card from the dad’s coat. | 我只从那个爸爸的大衣里偷了一张星巴克会员卡 |
| [12:23] | Why are you guys stealing from our guests? | 你们为什么要偷客人的东西啊 |
| [12:26] | Because they didn’t bring a hostess gift. | 因为他们没有带上门礼啊 |
| [12:32] | Victoria, you should not need pills | 维多利亚 你不该靠服药 |
| [12:34] | to keep up with your boyfriend. | 来跟上年轻男友的节奏 |
| [12:35] | He should love you for who you are. | 他应该爱原本真实的你才对 |
| [12:37] | Oh, grow up, Melanie. | 成熟点吧 梅兰妮 |
| [12:38] | Nobody loves anybody for who they are. | 没人会爱真实的对方 |
| [12:41] | These pills are the only thing keeping me going. | 那些药是唯一可以帮助我继续下去的动力 |
| [12:43] | But I’ve only got one left, and I need it to get upstairs. | 但我只剩下一颗了 我需要吃掉它才能爬上楼 |
| [12:48] | What am I gonna do? | 我该怎么办呢 |
| [12:49] | I need to get more Adderall | 我需要更多的「阿得拉」药 |
| [12:51] | so that I can make it through Barney’s birthday party. | 才能撑过巴尼的生日派对 |
| [12:54] | See, he’s the first one in our group turning 30, | 他是我们的小群体里第一个达到30岁的人 |
| [12:56] | so it’s a big one. | 所以会很盛大的 |
| [13:01] | Oh, Joy, honey, I’m sorry. Did we get you up? | 乔依 抱歉 是我们把你吵醒了吗 |
| [13:03] | No, I couldn’t sleep. Just feeling anxious. | 不是 我睡不着 感觉很焦虑 |
| [13:06] | About Wilbur? | 因为威尔伯的事吗 |
| [13:07] | No, I’m gonna talk to his teacher tomorrow. | 不 我打算明天去找他的老师谈谈 |
| [13:10] | Honey, why do you keep checking your phone? | 亲爱的 你为什么不停查看手机 |
| [13:12] | Well, Bob usually texts me at night. | 鲍勃通常晚上会给我发短信 |
| [13:14] | He lays out three pairs of pajamas, | 他会给我展示三套睡衣 |
| [13:16] | and I pick the ones I like. | 我会选出我喜欢的那套 |
| [13:19] | I mean, I’m glad he stopped. | 我是说 我很高兴他停止这种行为了 |
| [13:20] | It’s just weird not to get the text. | 只是没收到短信感觉怪怪的 |
| [13:22] | It’s a little weird either way. | 不管怎样都很怪啊 |
| [13:27] | Just admit it. You miss Bob. | 承认吧 你想鲍勃了 |
| [13:29] | It’s not that. I’m just used to him. | 不是那样的 我只是习惯了有他在 |
| [13:32] | But I don’t want to think about Bob. | 但我不想去想鲍勃 |
| [13:33] | I should be concentrating on Wilbur. | 我应该把精力集中在威尔伯身上 |
| [13:35] | You know what might be helpful? | 有个办法说不定行得通 |
| [13:37] | Getting a prescription for Wilbur for Adderall. | 给威尔伯开一张「阿得拉」药的处方 |
| [13:40] | What? | 什么 |
| [13:41] | I wouldn’t give him Adderall. | 我才不会给他吃「阿得拉」 |
| [13:43] | Oh, and I wouldn’t want you to. | 我也不希望你喂给他吃 |
| [13:52] | And the bully is Aiden. | 那个恶霸是艾登 |
| [13:54] | I’m not surprised. | 我毫不意外 |
| [13:55] | That kid’s a soul patch away from getting expelled. | 那孩子只差一点点就要被开除了 |
| [14:00] | So what do we do? | 那我们要怎么办 |
| [14:01] | The school has a whole process. | 学校有程序要求的 |
| [14:03] | Witness reports, evaluations. | 证人报告 评估 |
| [14:05] | I gotta tell you– it could take weeks. | 我这么跟你说吧 要好几周呢 |
| [14:07] | – Weeks? – I’ll go get the forms. | -好几周 -我去拿表格 |
| [14:28] | Wilbur? Did you throw that snowball? | 威尔伯 那个雪球是你扔的吗 |
| [14:30] | You’re not supposed to let people know your strength. | 你不应该让别人知道你的超能力 |
| [14:33] | What? | 什么 |
| [14:34] | When you lose your temper, you can really hurt people. | 你发脾气时 会伤害到别人 |
| [14:37] | Now I want you to promise never to do it again. | 我要你发誓你再也不会这么做了 |
| [14:40] | And shake on it. | 握手发誓 |
| [14:42] | Too hard. | 太用力了 |
| [14:46] | You know the doctor said those gamma rays made you super strong. | 医生说伽玛射线让你变得超级强大 |
| [14:49] | Is Wilbur the Hulk? | 威尔伯是绿巨人吗 |
| [14:51] | I’m not allowed to say. But yes. | 我本来不该说的 但是没错 |
| [14:56] | Just don’t make him angry. | 别惹他生气 |
| [15:08] | All right. Enough of that, you go play. | 好了 别肉麻了 你去玩吧 |
| [15:23] | Thank you guys for coming to my birthday. | 感谢你们来为我庆生 |
| [15:26] | And thank you, Victoria, for making this happen. | 谢谢你 维多利亚 为我办派对 |
| [15:29] | Being with you makes me so happy. | 和你在一起 我非常开心 |
| [15:32] | And being with you makes me so…tired. | 和你在一起 我非常…累 |
| [15:39] | You passed out in the birthday cake? | 你直接晕倒在生日蛋糕上了吗 |
| [15:41] | Oh, it was awful. | 太可怕了 |
| [15:43] | Just as I was thinking, “This is one of the worst moments of my life, | 我当时还想着 这是我这辈子最惨的时刻了吧 |
| [15:46] | “the waitress asked me | 服务员竟然跑来问我 |
| [15:47] | if I’d be paying for my son’s birthday party. | 要不要给我儿子的生日派对买单 |
| [15:52] | Oh, I’m sorry… | 我好遗憾 |
| [15:54] | I wasn’t there. | 我没在现场 |
| [15:59] | So you broke up with Barney? | 你跟巴尼分手了吗 |
| [16:00] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [16:01] | I mean, dating a younger guy is like driving a convertible. | 跟年轻人谈恋爱感觉像在开敞篷车 |
| [16:04] | It’s fun at first, but then you realize your hair is a mess, | 一开始很好玩 然后就发现头发被吹乱了 |
| [16:07] | you’re sun burnt, and everyone assumes you rented it anyway. | 皮肤被晒伤了 而别人还以为这车是你租的 |
| [16:14] | Hey, Joy. Where you been? | 乔依 你上哪儿去了 |
| [16:15] | Out driving around. | 开车出去转了一下 |
| [16:17] | Trying to sort through some feelings. | 梳理一下情绪 |
| [16:21] | I saw it. I saw the aura. | 我看到了 我看到了光环 |
| [16:25] | I think I’m in love with Bob. | 我想我爱上鲍勃了 |
| [16:27] | What changed things? | 是什么让你改变了想法 |
| [16:29] | He clobbered a seven-year-old with a snowball to protect Wilbur. | 他拿雪球砸一个7岁小孩 来保护威尔伯 |
| [16:33] | It was the most romantic thing anyone’s ever done for me. | 那是别人为我做过的最浪漫的事了 |
| [16:37] | – Is the kid hurt? – Who cares? | -那孩子受伤了吗 -管他呢 |
| [16:41] | I’m in love. | 我坠入爱河了 |
| [16:42] | And I’m finally seeing what everyone else was already seeing. | 我终于看到了别人早就看到的东西 |
| [16:45] | We’re a couple. | 我们是一对 |
| [16:47] | I used to think, “He’s not Simon. He’s not Mitch. | 我以前会想 他不是西蒙 不是米奇 |
| [16:50] | He’s Bob.” | 他只是鲍勃 |
| [16:52] | But now I think, “He’s not Simon. He’s not Mitch. | 现在我想的是 他不是西蒙 不是米奇 |
| [16:55] | He’s Bob.” | 他可是鲍勃 |
| [17:02] | She is so gonna say “aw” when she wakes up. | 她醒来也会跟我们一样感叹的 |
| [17:08] | Oh, Bob. | 鲍勃 |
| [17:10] | I’m so glad you’re here. | 我很高兴你在这里 |
| [17:13] | Joy, this is a surprise. | 乔依 真是意外啊 |
| [17:15] | There’s so much I need to tell you. | 我有好多话要跟你说 |
| [17:18] | I was at the school today, | 我今天那个时候也在学校 |
| [17:19] | and I saw what you did for Wilbur. | 看到了你为威尔伯做的事 |
| [17:21] | I’m sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
| [17:22] | I know you told me to butt out, but it’s just… | 我知道你让我别管闲事 但我就是 |
| [17:24] | He was on my mind the whole time I was in Canada and I just– | 我在加拿大的时候总惦记着他 我就… |
| [17:26] | No, no. No, I loved it. | 不不不 我喜欢你做的一切 |
| [17:28] | And I’m sorry about what I said the other night. | 我很抱歉前几天晚上我说的那些话 |
| [17:31] | Joy, you never need to apologize to me for anything. | 乔依 你不用向我道歉 |
| [17:34] | Sure, I cried a few manly tears at first, | 当然了 一开始我是弹了几滴男儿泪 |
| [17:37] | but…then in the bracing Saskatchewan cold, | 但是后来在萨斯喀彻温省的严寒中 |
| [17:40] | who should I run into but my old girlfriend? | 我偏偏碰上了我的前女友 |
| [17:43] | Canadian Joy. She– | 加拿大乔依 她 |
| [17:45] | Oh. Sorry to interrupt. | 很抱歉打扰你们 |
| [17:47] | No, not at all. You two should meet. | 不 没事 你们应该认识一下 |
| [17:49] | Joy, Joy. Joy, Joy. | 乔依 这是乔依 乔依 这是乔依 |
| [17:51] | – Joy. – Joy. | -乔依你好 -乔依你好 |
| [17:54] | Hey, babe, I couldn’t get the vending machine to work. | 亲爱的 自动售货机用不了 |
| [17:57] | Ah, that machine is temperamental. | 那机器的脾气变化无常 |
| [17:59] | That’s why I treat it like a woman. | 所以我把它当女人对待 |
| [18:01] | Just keep putting money into it till it gives me what I want. | 一直往里面投钱 直到它给我想要的 |
| [18:06] | He’s funny. | 他很风趣 |
| [18:07] | Cut the crap, Cleveland Joy. | 废话少说 克利夫兰乔依 |
| [18:11] | I know you want him, but he’s mine. | 我知道你想得到他 但他是我的 |
| [18:13] | You make one move on him, and I’ll chop you up | 你敢对他动半点心思 我就剁了你 |
| [18:15] | and feed you to my sled dogs. | 然后拿去喂我的雪橇犬 |
| [18:18] | Damn, my hand is stuck. | 该死 我的手卡住了 |
| [18:19] | Be right there, Bob. Isn’t he cutest? | 马上来 鲍勃 他是不是很可爱 |
| [18:22] | Say yes and I’ll kill you. | 你敢说是 我就杀了你 |
| [18:35] | Well, that’s the last of the Kahlua. | 咖啡酒喝完了 |
| [18:37] | Should we make some more? | 我们要再做一些吗 |
| [18:38] | Oh, I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [18:40] | I drunk dialed my old bully last night | 我昨晚在醉酒时联系了当年霸凌我的人 |
| [18:42] | and left a long and rambling message. | 还瞎扯了一大段留言 |
| [18:45] | Oh, I wouldn’t worry about it. Maybe she didn’t get it. | 要是我 我才不担心呢 说不定她没收到 |
| [18:47] | Hey, Melanie. Are you in there? | 嘿 梅兰妮 你在里面吗 |
| [18:49] | It’s her. It’s my bully. | 是她来了 当年霸凌我的人 |
| [18:52] | I guess she got it. | 看来她收到了 |
| [19:03] | Melanie. | 梅兰妮 |
| [19:08] | Hi. | 你好 |
| [19:11] | Hi, Kaylin. What a surprise. | 你好 凯琳 真是意外啊 |
| [19:13] | Well, I got your message, and so I asked my pilot | 我收到了你的留言 所以就让我的飞行员 |
| [19:16] | to stop here on my way to New York. | 飞纽约途中在这里停一下 |
| [19:18] | Your pilot? What, you have a plane? | 你的飞行员 什么 你有一架飞机 |
| [19:20] | Well, two. | 其实是两架 |
| [19:22] | I am uber successful. | 我”优步”登天 |
| [19:24] | Because I created Uber. | 因为优步打车软件就是我创办的 |
| [19:28] | This is for you. | 这是给你的 |
| [19:29] | You’re not gonna hit me with it, are ya? | 你不是要拿这个砸我吧 |
| [19:31] | Of course not. Think fast! | 当然不是 接招吧 |
| [19:33] | Oh, God! | 天呐 |
| [19:36] | Oh, nobody ever flinched like you, Moretti. | 没人像你这么胆小哆嗦 莫雷蒂 |
| [19:39] | It’s a gift for you | 这是给你的礼物 |
| [19:40] | signed by the basketball team I own. | 上面有我旗下所持有的球队的签名 |
| [19:42] | Oh, well, okay, | 好吧 |
| [19:43] | so it’s an apology gift for the way you treated me. | 算是你为以前的所为给我的道歉礼物吧 |
| [19:46] | No, no. It’s more like a thank-you. | 不 应该说是感谢礼物 |
| [19:49] | You taught me how great it feels to intimidate | 你让我体会到 哪怕恐吓最讨喜的人 |
| [19:51] | even the most likable person. | 也有一种超爽的感觉 |
| [19:55] | You’re the reason I’m so successful. | 我今天的成功完全归功于你 |
| [19:59] | Now give me a hug. | 来抱一下 |
| [20:00] | Oh, no. No, I’m not–not gonna hug you. | 不不不 我不会抱你的 |
| [20:01] | – I said a hug. – Okay. | -我说了抱一下 -好吧 |
| [20:05] | Wow. You got boobs. | 哇 你有胸了耶 |
| [20:08] | Never thought that was gonna happen. | 我当年可没料到过这一点 |
| [20:15] | Guess I got my apology. | 看来我算是收到道歉了 |
| [20:17] | Is that what happened? | 真的是这样吗 |
| [20:20] | Yeah, that’s how I choose to look at it. | 是啊 我宁愿这么想 |
| [20:21] | I choose to see the glass as half full. | 我宁愿乐观看待[杯子是半满的] |
| [20:24] | Not for long. | 马上就全空了 |