| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Great. So,um,I’ll give you a call. | 好吧 回去我打给你 |
| [00:05] | – I hope you do. – All right. | – 要记得哦 – 没问题 |
| [00:09] | Look at this. | 瞧瞧呀 |
| [00:10] | I just got that girl’s number. Check it out. | 我刚刚拿到那美女号码了 你们看 |
| [00:13] | Holly. Nice. | 叫Holly 干得好 |
| [00:15] | Girls whose names end in L-Y are always dirty. | 女生名字要是以ly结尾 通常都很浪 |
| [00:19] | Holly,Kelly,Carly,Lily. | 比如说Holly Kelly Carly Lily |
| [00:24] | Oh,yeah,I know it’s true. | 倒也没说错 |
| [00:27] | And don’t even get me started on girlshose names should end in Y, | 更别说那些本以为是名字以Y结尾 |
| [00:31] | but instead end in I. | 其实是以I结尾的女生 |
| [00:33] | Those girls are like roller coasters. | 搭上她们就像坐过山车那样 |
| [00:35] | You got to wait in a long line,but once you get up there, | 你得排一长条队 可等你上车后 |
| [00:38] | you just hold on for dear life and hope you don’t drop your keys. | 你只会感叹想要抓住美好的人生 希望别掉链子 |
| [00:41] | Hey,you know what I’m gonna do? | 知道我要怎么做吗? |
| [00:42] | I’m gonna call her right now. | 我现在就打给她 |
| [00:44] | I’m gonna do that whole,”Hey,remember me? It’s been so long.” | 我要跟她讲 “嘿 还记得我吧? 有一阵子没见了” |
| [00:49] | See,it’s funny because I just saw her. | 很有趣吧 因为我刚刚才见过她 |
| [00:51] | Dude,you can’t call her. | 兄弟 不能打给她 |
| [00:52] | You have to wait three days to call a woman. That’s the rule. | 你得三天后才能打给她 这是规矩 |
| [00:55] | Barney,that rule is completely played out. | Barney 这规矩已经过时了 |
| [00:57] | Girls know exactly what you’re doing. | 女生们都知道你在想什么 |
| [00:58] | Hey,I got a new rule. | 嘿 我来创造个新规矩 |
| [01:01] | It’s kind of crazy,but I call it,You like her,you call her. | 虽然有点不着调 我把它叫做 “喜欢她 就打给她” |
| [01:05] | I’m sorry. Can you repeat that? I don’t speak I Never Get Laid. | 不好意思 能再说一次吗? 我不太懂”钓不到妞”语 |
| [01:10] | Barney,the Three Days Rule is insane. | Barney 三天之约太愚蠢了 |
| [01:12] | I mean,who even came up with that? | 你说 谁提出来的? |
| [01:15] | Jesus. | 耶稣 |
| [01:17] | Barney,don’t do this. Not with Jesus. | Barney 别这样 别把耶稣扯进来 |
| [01:20] | Seriously. Jesus started the whole wait-three-days thing. | 我认真的 三天之约确实是耶稣创造的 |
| [01:24] | He waited three days to come back to life. | 他被钉死第三天才复活的 |
| [01:26] | It was perfect. | 这才完美嘛 |
| [01:27] | If he have only waited one day,a lot of people wouldn’t have even heard that he died. | 要是他等一天就复活 很多人甚至都不知道他的死讯 |
| [01:31] | They’d be all,”Hey,Jesus,what up?” | 不知情的就跟他打招呼 “嘿 耶稣 吃了饭没?” |
| [01:33] | And Jesus would probably be,like,”What up? I died yesterday.” | 耶稣可能就会这么说 “吃啥饭呀? 我昨儿个死了” |
| [01:37] | And then they’d be all,Uh,you look pretty alive to me,dude. | 而其他人就说 “呃 我看你还挺鲜活的呀 兄弟” |
| [01:41] | And then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected and how it was a miracle. | 然后耶稣就得跟他们解释 他是怎么奇迹般地复活的 |
| [01:45] | And then,the dude would be,like,Uh,okay,whatever you say,bro. | 那些家伙就会说”好了 兄弟你就吹吧” |
| [01:49] | Wow,ancient dialogue sounds so stilted now. | 古人说话咋这么做作 |
| [01:52] | And he’s not going to come back on a Saturday. | 然而他要星期六复活也不成 (耶稣星期日复活) |
| [01:54] | Everybody’s busy doing chores. | 大家都忙着家务事呢 |
| [01:57] | Working the loom,trimming their beards. No. | 他们都在家织布 修胡须 复活可不成 (犹太人星期六不工作) |
| [02:00] | He waits the exact right number of days… Three. | 他等到最适合的时间… 第三天 |
| [02:04] | Okay,I promise– I’ll wait three days. Just please stop talking. | 好了 我保证第三天才打电话 拜托咱们转话题吧 |
| [02:09] | Plus,it’s Sunday,so everyone’s in church already. | 还有 那时是星期日 大家都在教堂呢 |
| [02:12] | They’re all in there,Oh,no,Jesus is dead. | 在教堂见到耶稣 说”不 耶稣竟然死了” |
| [02:15] | Then,bam! He bursts through the back door,runs up the aisle. | 然后 砰! 他推开后门 穿过走廊 |
| [02:19] | Everyone’s totally psyched. | 大家都激动死了 |
| [02:21] | And,FYI,that’s when he invented the high-five. | 还有 你要知道 击掌就是在那时发明的 |
| [02:24] | Three days,Ted. | 三天 Ted |
| [02:25] | We wait three days to call a woman because that’s how long Jesus wants us to wait. | 三天后再打给那女生 因为耶稣要我们等三天 |
| [02:33] | True story. | 我可是说真的 |
| [02:46] | How I Met Your Mother Season04 Episode21 | |
| [02:48] | Okay,fine. I promise,I won’t call Holly for three days. | 好吧 我保证三天后再打给Holly |
| [02:53] | But I never said anything about texting. | 可我没说不能发短信 |
| [02:56] | I started things off with something cute and charming. | 我发了一条可爱又迷人的短信 |
| [02:59] | “I was thinking about you,so I thought I’d send you a little texty text.” | “我正想你呢 所以给你发条小短信” |
| [03:03] | And the moment I hit “Send,” I realized it wasn’t cute at all. | 在我手指按上”发送”之时 我意识到这一点都不可爱 |
| [03:07] | texty text It was the lamest thing anyone has ever said to anyone. | 小短信 |
| [03:07] | 对别人说这话 真是丢脸死了 | |
| [03:11] | And the worst thing about texting is that once you send it… | 而发短信最大的缺点 就是一旦你发了出去… |
| [03:17] | Oh,no! No! | 别! 别跑! |
| [03:20] | you can never get it back. | 就覆水难收了 |
| [03:23] | And then… you wait. | 然后…你就等着回信 |
| [03:23] | ****** | 23分钟后 |
| [03:25] | And just when you’ve decided never to text anyone again… | 就在你决定再也不给别人发短信的同时 |
| [03:30] | “I’ve been thinking about you,too, | “我也在想着你呢” |
| [03:33] | “and how weird is it that you texted me while I was in the bath?” | “收到短信时我就躺在浴缸 很奇怪吧?” |
| [03:43] | – What was that? – What? | – 你怎么了? – 啥? |
| [03:45] | – You made a noise. – That was my phone. I got a text. | – 你发出了奇怪的声音 – 是我的手机 我收到短信了 |
| [03:48] | – Not that. You made your naked lady noise. – What? | – 不是说那个 你发出了裸女之声 – 啥? |
| [03:51] | Whenever you see a naked lady,you make the noise. | 每次你见到裸女 就会发出这种声音 |
| [03:57] | I don’t do that. | 才不是呢 |
| [03:58] | Really? | 真的吗? |
| [04:02] | Oh,God,sorry,Lily. | 不好意思 Lily |
| [04:08] | While the men are out hunting,the women of New Guinea’s indigenous Korowai tribe | 家里的男人都出去打猎了 新几内亚Korowai部落的女人 |
| [04:12] | wash their clothes in the river. | 就会在河边洗衣服 |
| [04:22] | That’s totally a boob. | 这肯定是胸部 |
| [04:26] | Is that Holly who keeps texting you? | 是那个Holly给你发短信吗? |
| [04:28] | Didn’t you promise to wait three days? | 你不是保证过要等三天吗? |
| [04:29] | To call,yes. Texting is totally different. | 不打电话嘛 发短信可不同 |
| [04:32] | Okay,well,just try to keep the naked lady noises to a minimum. | 随你了 只要把裸女之声调到最低就好 |
| [04:36] | I don’t make a naked lady noise. | 我没有发出裸女之声 |
| [04:39] | Really? | 真的? |
| [04:47] | Holly and I stayed up texting until 2:00 in the morning. | 我和Holly互发短信直到凌晨2点 |
| [04:51] | And we spent the whole next day texting each other,too. | 第二天我们也发了一整天短信 |
| [04:55] | She seemed perfect. | 她真的很棒 |
| [04:58] | Holly just told me what she’s wearing right now. | Holly刚跟我说她现在穿着什么 |
| [05:01] | It is pretty hot. | 可真辣呀 |
| [05:02] | Yeah,whatever it is,I can guarantee you she’s not wearing it. | 不管是什么 我向你保证 她没说真话 |
| [05:06] | She’s lying to you to make you like her. | 她在说谎 好让你喜欢她 |
| [05:07] | – How do you know that? – Here. Come here. | – 你怎么知道? – 拿来 |
| [05:10] | Because no woman in the history of the world is ever | 因为史上从来没有女孩会 |
| [05:12] | “just sitting around reading architecture magazines in my old cheerleader uniform.” | “穿着以前的啦啦队制服 静静坐着看建筑杂志” |
| [05:18] | Okay,maybe she’s lying about the architecture magazines. | 好吧 或许看建筑杂志那是假的 |
| [05:27] | Oh,no. | 噢 不 |
| [05:28] | – Oh,no. This is bad. – What? | – 噢 不 坏菜了 – 怎么了? |
| [05:30] | She just sent me a text that was clearly meant for someone else. | 她刚刚发了条短信 明显收信人就不该是我 |
| [05:36] | “Hey,baby,I picked up some take-out from Generro’s. Be home soon.” | “亲爱的 我去Generro那儿带点外卖 很快回来” |
| [05:40] | Okay,yes,this sounds bad,but let’s think about this,okay? | 听起来不太妙 不过往好的方面想 |
| [05:43] | It could be for a brother or maybe her sick dad. | 可能是她兄弟 或者是有个病了的爸爸 |
| [05:47] | Scroll down. | 继续看 |
| [05:50] | “And then I want you to do me on the couch.” | “然后我要你在沙发上干我” |
| [05:55] | Okay,maybe not a sick dad. | 好吧 不一定是个病老爸 |
| [05:57] | Or a very sick dad. Am I right? | 可能是个变态老爸 对吧? |
| [06:03] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [06:05] | Hey,guys. | 大伙儿 |
| [06:08] | God. What is this? | 这是啥? |
| [06:11] | It’s just some take-out from Generro’s. I’m bringing it home for Lily. | Generro’s那儿的外卖 给Lily带的 |
| [06:13] | Oh,that’s weird. | 奇怪了 |
| [06:15] | Holly just texted Ted something about take-out from Generro’s. | Holly刚给Ted发了条短信 要去Generro’s那儿带外卖 |
| [06:20] | Wait a second. | 等等 |
| [06:23] | – You sons of bitches. – What? | – 你们俩混蛋 – 怎么了? |
| [06:26] | You’re Holly. | 你们就是Holly |
| [06:32] | So Ted hasn’t been texting Holly at all? | 这么说给Ted发短信的人不是Holly? |
| [06:35] | He’s been texting you two? | 他一直在跟你们发短信? |
| [06:37] | Look,we knew he’d try to call her before the three days,so I swiped his phone, | 我们就知道他忍不了三天 所以我偷了他电话 |
| [06:41] | and I changed her number to my work cell. | 把那女生的号码换为我的工作手机号码 |
| [06:44] | We were just gonna bust on him for calling her too soon,but then he started texting her. | 我们只是想抓到他不遵守规矩 没想到他给她竟然发短信 |
| [06:51] | Texty text? | 小短信? |
| [06:53] | Oh,Ted. | 噢 Ted |
| [06:54] | Oh,poor,sweet Ted. We should… we should tell him it’s us. | 可怜的Ted呀 咱们–咱们得告诉他这是我们 |
| [06:59] | Yeah. Or… | 好 又或者… |
| [07:01] | we pretend we’re Holly,and we’re in the bath. | 我们装作是Holly 现在躺在浴缸 |
| [07:05] | Yeah,that’s better. | 这主意更好 |
| [07:13] | Well,that was fun. | 真好玩 |
| [07:14] | We should tell him that it’s us. | 我们还是告诉他真相吧 |
| [07:16] | Yeah,we should. Or… | 应该的 又或者… |
| [07:19] | we tell him our favorite color is red,and we think the cowboy look is very sexy. | 我们跟他说红色是咱们的最爱 还有牛仔装扮非常性感 |
| [07:25] | Yeah,that’s better. | 不错 |
| [07:27] | I’m wearing them right now,and they do look sexy. | 穿着呢 没错 真的很性感 |
| [07:33] | – He put on the boots! – He totally put on the boots! | – 他穿上了那双靴子! – 他真的穿上了那双靴子! |
| [07:37] | – That was awesome! – Yeah. | – 帅呀! – 对呀 |
| [07:39] | But it’s time to tell him who he really put those boots on for. | 不过是时候告诉他是谁在玩他了 |
| [07:42] | Yeah. Or… | 没错 又或者… |
| [07:45] | we just took off our shirt. | 说美女正宽衣解带 |
| [07:48] | Yeah,that’s better. | 不错 |
| [07:50] | You think maybe we’re wearing a black lace bra underneath? | 你说咱们穿着黑色蕾丝胸罩打底好不? |
| [07:56] | I don’t think we’re wearing anything underneath. | 我觉得咱们不应该打底 |
| [07:58] | God,we’re hot. | 老天 咱们真辣 |
| [08:02] | Now he’s only wearing the cowboy boots! It is on! | 现在他只穿着那双牛仔靴子了! 好戏上场了! |
| [08:06] | It is so on! Okay,okay,tell him that we’re… | 来吧来吧! 好 咱们这么说… |
| [08:08] | we’re slowing slipping out of our… | 咱们慢慢地褪下… |
| [08:13] | What are we doing? | 咱们在干嘛呢? |
| [08:16] | I think that we’re about to have sex with Ted. | 我估计咱们要跟Ted电话做爱了 |
| [08:25] | So,you did this to him all day? That’s just mean. | 你们就这么一整天地耍他? 太过分了 |
| [08:28] | No,no. No,it was… It was actually for his own good. | 不…这样是为了他好 |
| [08:32] | We’re protecting him from himself. | 我们在保护他不被自己所伤害 |
| [08:33] | He… No. He really likes this girl. | 他…他真的喜欢这女孩 |
| [08:35] | He had that-that look in his eye. | 从他的眼神能看出来 |
| [08:37] | Yeah,that crazy “I’m about to move too fast and screw this up” look. | 对 那种”我会进展过快而搞砸”的眼神 |
| [08:41] | It was actually the same look he had on his first date with you. | 这跟与你第一次约会的眼神是一样的 |
| [08:43] | – And we all remember how that went. – Yeah. | – 大家都记得最后怎样了吧 – 没错 |
| [08:46] | – I think I’m in love with you. – What? | – 我爱上你了 – 啥? |
| [08:49] | Yeah,well,I-I think I was a special case. | 嗯 我-我觉得自己是个特别的例子 |
| [08:52] | This Holly is no Robin Scherbatsky. | 这个Holly可不是Robin Scherbatsky |
| [08:56] | Hey,what is the deal with her hair? | 嘿 她头发是怎么回事? |
| [08:57] | I mean,news flash: they make conditioners that don’t leave a buildup. | 最新消息:就跟现在的空调一样偷工减料 |
| [09:02] | I’m so b. | 我太坏了 |
| [09:03] | Look,it’s been a while since Ted really liked someone. | 听着 Ted很久没这么喜欢过一个人了 |
| [09:06] | He’s clearly got a lot of crazy stored up. We just… | 他隐忍了很久 我们只是… |
| [09:09] | we thought we’d get him to say “I love you” before he even makes contact with this girl. | 我们想让他说”我爱你”之前 起码能了解下这个女孩 |
| [09:13] | And you can tell it’s on the way. He’s exhibiting all the telltale signs. | 你跟她继续说 我拿证据出来 |
| [09:16] | Yeah. One: He joked about getting married. | 第一:他拿结婚开玩笑 |
| [09:19] | “You like architecture? We should get married.” “Ha-ha.LOL.” | “你喜欢建筑师? 咱们结婚吧” “哈哈 LOL.” (laugh out loud简写 大声地笑) |
| [09:24] | “Just kidding. Question mark?” | “开玩笑的啦 问号” |
| [09:27] | Two: He made a crazy way-too-soon trip suggestion. | 第二:他太单刀直入了 |
| [09:31] | “I like beer,too. We should totally go to Germany together.” | “我也喜欢啤酒 咱们一起去德国吧” |
| [09:34] | “LOL.JK.LOL.” | (just kidding简写 开玩笑) “LOL.JK.LOL.” |
| [09:39] | And three: He got way too personal way too soon. | 第三:他太快进入私人话题 |
| [09:43] | “Yeah,my parents got divorced a couple years back. | “我父母几年前离婚了 |
| [09:46] | It was really tough.” LOL.” | 那时我很难过” “LOL.” |
| [09:50] | And he clearly doesn’t know what LOL means. | 他肯定不知道LOL啥意思吧 |
| [09:52] | Yeah,but here’s the real problem. | 还有个更严重的问题 |
| [09:54] | Ted wasn’t saying “I love you” as easily as we thought he would. | Ted没我们想象中容易说”我爱你” |
| [09:57] | Then we met… Stan. | 直到我们遇到…Stan |
| [10:06] | Why are you making so much noise,man? | 吵吵啥呀? 伙计 |
| [10:10] | So we explained everything to him,and when we were done,something amazing happened. | 我们就跟他解释咯 解释完后 有趣的事情发生了 |
| [10:16] | Why don’t you tell Ted that just knowing he’s out there,thinking about you, | 不如你们跟Ted说 他能想着你们 |
| [10:19] | caring about you,makes you feel safe? | 关心你们 让你们有安全感很开心? |
| [10:22] | So,all your fears,all your yesterdays wash away, | 你们的恐惧 往事统统赶走 |
| [10:26] | and only hope remains in the promise of his embrace. | 希望就留在他承诺的怀抱中 |
| [10:32] | Go,Stan. Who is this guy? | Stan好家伙 他谁呀? |
| [10:35] | He’s a security guard who works nights. | 他是个夜班的保安 |
| [10:36] | And he eats lunch at MacLaren’s every day. | 他每天都在Maclaren’s吃午饭 |
| [10:38] | – And he wasn’t done. – Not by a long shot. | – 他还没说完 – 喝了点小酒后 |
| [10:41] | You make me thank God for every mistake I ever made | 你让我为自己犯下的每个错误 都心怀感激 |
| [10:43] | because each one led me down the path that brought me to you. | 因为它们把我带到你身边 |
| [10:48] | That’s,uh,really nice,man. | 你真好 兄弟 |
| [10:51] | Whatever. It’s okay. | 管他呢 挺好的 |
| [10:54] | “And when finally come together,”I want you to hold me. | “当相遇那一天终于来临 我想要你抱着我” |
| [10:58] | Hold me” “all night. Stroke my hair.” | “整晚的抱着我 抚摸着我的秀发” |
| [11:01] | “Tell me I’m a woman and show me you’re a man. | “让我知道自己是个弱女子 而你是个真男人” |
| [11:04] | Until there there was only now.” | “矢志不渝” |
| [11:06] | You and I… and now.” | “你和我…尽在此刻” |
| [11:11] | Yes! | 我愿意! |
| [11:14] | You want me to text that to Ted. I know that. | 你想让我把这些话发给Ted 我明白了 |
| [11:19] | “I do not ask “of the night explanations. | “我不需要你今晚做出决定 |
| [11:22] | I wait for it,and it envelops me,” | 我愿意等 而这感觉拥抱着我” |
| [11:25] | “and so you and bread and light and shadow are.” | “而我也被你被面包和阳光以及阴影围绕” |
| [11:31] | That’s Pablo Neruda. | 这是诗人Pablo Neruda写的 |
| [11:33] | I don’t know,um,what bread was doing in there, | 我不知道干嘛会提到面包 |
| [11:36] | but that touched me here and here. | 但这些话真的打动我的这里和这里 |
| [11:42] | Well,if Ted won’t say it,I will. | 好吧 如果Ted不愿说这番话 我替他会说的 |
| [11:46] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [11:49] | That’s cool. | 很好 |
| [11:53] | Still nothing,huh? | 还是没回复 啊? |
| [11:54] | Maybe he’s not in love with us. | 可能他并不爱我们吧 |
| [11:56] | How can he not be in love with us? We’re everything he’s looking for. | 他怎能不爱我们? 我们就是他苦苦寻找的一切 |
| [11:59] | I don’t get men. | 我真搞不懂男人 |
| [12:02] | Got to head to work. | 我要回去工作了 |
| [12:03] | Will you be… Will you be back? | 你还会…还会回来吗? |
| [12:06] | I’ll be back when the wind and fates and chance bring me back. | 当风吹起 命运召唤我之时 我会回来的 |
| [12:10] | Which will be tomorrow. | 可能是明天吧 |
| [12:12] | It’s cheese steak day. | 明天奶酪牛排搞特价 |
| [12:16] | It sounds like you were all over this guy. | 听着你们很迷这个大汉啊 |
| [12:19] | Hope his girlfriend didn’t get jealous. | 希望他的女朋友不会吃醋 |
| [12:22] | Did he mention a girlfriend or… | 他有提到女朋友或者… |
| [12:25] | It was all going great until Marshall sent Ted a text meant for Lily and ruined everything. | 一切进展顺利直到Marshall 把给Lily的短信误发给了Ted 全毁了 |
| [12:30] | Well,it doesn’t matter. Okay? It’s over now. | 没关系 知道吧 一切都结束了 |
| [12:33] | I got to get going,but here’s what’s going to happen: | 我要走了 但是你们得这么做: |
| [12:35] | You’re going to call him right now,tell him what you did,and apologize. | 你们赶紧打电话给他 坦白你们的恶作剧 向他道歉 |
| [12:39] | – You got it? – Yes. | – 你们听清楚了吗? – 明白了 |
| [12:45] | Or… | 或者… |
| [12:47] | Holly explained everything. It was all just a misunderstanding. | Holly解释说那完全是个误会 |
| [12:50] | – Everything’s great now. – Really? | – 现在没事了 – 真的? |
| [12:52] | Uh,how did,uh,Holly explain her way out of that one? | 那么Holly是怎么解释那件事的? |
| [12:55] | Well,apparently,her dumb friend Marsha accidentally used her phone to text her husband Billy. | 事实上是她的蠢朋友Marsha 不小心用了她的手机给老公Billy发短信 |
| [13:00] | Marsha and Billy. | Marsha和Billy |
| [13:02] | No one sprained any muscles there. | 可真是天衣无缝啊 |
| [13:05] | And now we are better than ever. | 我们俩感情反而更好了 |
| [13:08] | Look,I know this sounds crazy,but I think I might actually be falling for this girl. | 看 虽然听起来很不可思议 但我觉得自己是爱上这个女孩了 |
| [13:13] | – You’re falling for Barney and Marshall. – What? | – 你是爱上了Barney和Marshall – 什么? |
| [13:16] | They didn’t believe that you could wait the three days, | 他们不相信你会等上3天 |
| [13:19] | so Barney changed her number in your phone to his work cell. | 所以Barney把你手机里她的号码 换成了自己的商务号码 |
| [13:22] | Holly is Barney and Marshall. | Holly就是Barney和Marshall |
| [13:24] | Wait. That whole time it was them? | 慢着 这全是他们搞的? |
| [13:28] | So Holly wasn’t in the bath? | 那么Holly没有躺在浴缸里? |
| [13:33] | Or sitting by her window,looking up at the stars,thinking about me? | 没有坐在窗户边上 看着满天繁星 在想我? |
| [13:40] | Or lounging in her old cheerleader uniform reading architecture magazines? | 也没有套上旧拉拉队服在读建筑杂志? |
| [13:48] | Yeah. I don’t think they actually did those things. | 对 我想他们都没做这些事 |
| [13:51] | They were just at the bar. | 他们只是待在酒吧里 |
| [13:53] | Right. | 没错 |
| [13:54] | But,yeah,it was them. | 没错 但就是他们搞的鬼 |
| [13:57] | – Unbelievab. – I know. | – 真不敢相信 – 我明白 |
| [13:59] | So you might as well tell them you’re on to them. | 你也可以跟他们说 你识破了他们的恶作剧 |
| [14:01] | Yeah. Or… | 对 或者… |
| [14:05] | I text them something that will really mess with their heads. | 我给他们发一些让他们摸不着头脑的东西 |
| [14:07] | Oh,I gotcha. Okay. How about… | 哦 我明白了 比如说… |
| [14:12] | “I haven’t told any of my friends yet,but I only have three months to live?” | “我没跟自己的朋友提起过 其实我只剩3个月的命了?” |
| [14:17] | – Not bad. – Yeah. | – 不错 – 对 |
| [14:18] | How about “I once killed a man with a shovel,and those feelings are creeping up again”? | 比如说 “我曾经拿铁铲杀了一个人 那种感觉似乎又回来了”? |
| [14:24] | I-I liked that thing someone said before about having three months to live. | 我喜欢刚才有人提到的 只剩3月寿命的建议 |
| [14:28] | How about “I never told anyone this,but I slept with my best friend’s mom”? | 比如说”我从未跟别人说过 但我和好友的妈妈上过床”? |
| [14:33] | Oh,that is good,but I feel like we keep coming back to that three months to live thing. | 不错 但我更想接着回到只剩3个月可活的话题 |
| [14:38] | – Wait. I think I got it. – Oh,yeah? | – 等等 我知道了 – 哦 真的? |
| [14:43] | He texted back! | 他回短信了! |
| [14:45] | “I probably shouldn’t tell you this. | “我本不该跟你说的” |
| [14:48] | I mean we barely know each other.” | “我是说我们根本不了解彼此” |
| [14:51] | But what the hell,I’ll just say it. | “但是管他呢 我还是想说” |
| [14:53] | This is it,dude. Here comes the “I love you.” | 来了来了 伙计 要说”我爱你”了 |
| [14:56] | – Stan – I sh Stan were here. – Stan. | – 真希望Stan也在这儿 |
| [15:02] | What? | 什么? |
| [15:04] | I sometimes have gay dreams about my best friend. | 我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦 |
| [15:14] | I sometimes have gay dreams about my best friend. | 我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦 |
| [15:18] | Why in the world would Ted text a girl he barely knows that he sometimes has gay dreams about me? | Ted到底为何会对一个陌生的女孩说 他有时会对我存有同性恋幻想? |
| [15:25] | Slow your roll. You? | 慢着下结论 他指的是你? |
| [15:27] | He’s clearly talking about me. | 很明显他是在说我 |
| [15:29] | Dude,it’s me. I’m his best friend. | 伙计 是我 我是他最好的哥们 |
| [15:32] | Okay,one: that has never been proven. | 好吧 第一:这从未得到证实 |
| [15:34] | Two: If anyone were to have gay dreams about one of us,it would be me. | 第二:如果有人会对我们其中一个 产生同性恋幻想 那也必然是对我 |
| [15:38] | I mean,look at me. Now look at you. | 看看我 再看看你自己 |
| [15:41] | A still-in-the-closet 80-year-old wouldn’t be into that mess. | 即使是80岁的老古董也不会是 你这副德行 |
| [15:46] | Here’s the thing,Barney. I’m snuggly. You’re not. | 关键在于 Barney 我让人感觉温暖 而你不是 |
| [15:49] | Who wouldn’t want to snuggle up next to this business on a Sunday morning? | 谁周日早上不想偎依在这结实的怀抱里? |
| [15:53] | Wrapped in a comforter,and it’s raining outside,and there’s muffins warming in the oven. | 缠绕在胸膛里 就算窗外下着雨 烤炉里正热着松饼 |
| [15:58] | I’m cuddly,bitch. Deal with it. | 我就是如此居家 贱人 就是这样 |
| [16:00] | I work out every day. | 我每天都健身 |
| [16:03] | If there is one thing we know about Ted,it’s that he likes a nice body. | 我们最了解Ted的莫过于他喜欢好身材 |
| [16:06] | This body would rock his world. | 这副身材会让他疯狂 |
| [16:08] | Ted and I have a history. I know what he likes. | 我和Ted结交多年 我知道他的喜好 |
| [16:11] | There are things I could do to him that would blow his mind… | 我能为他做的那些事 会让他失去理智… |
| [16:17] | Why do we keep trying to have sex with Ted? | 为啥我们要抢着去和Ted嘿咻? |
| [16:19] | I don’t know. It’s weird. | 我也不知道 太奇怪了 |
| [16:21] | Crazy,right? | 简直疯了 对吧? |
| [16:23] | Ted’s having gay dreams about me. | Ted对我有同性恋幻想 |
| [16:25] | And by me,he means M-E,Marshall Eriksen, | 他所说的”我” 指的是M-E Marshall Eriksen |
| [16:30] | star of Ted’s gay dreams. | Ted同性恋春梦里的情人 |
| [16:32] | Who cares? So Ted has gay dreams about one of you guys. | 管他呢 就是说Ted同性恋春梦梦到你们其中一个 |
| [16:35] | It’s not like you found out he has three months to live. | 而不是你们发现他只剩3个月的寿命 |
| [16:39] | That’s like,oh,shocking,right? | 这真是 太震惊了 对吧? |
| [16:43] | Hey,look at this guy. | 嘿 瞧瞧这小子 |
| [16:45] | How’s it going,uh,best friend of 12 years? | 今天还好吧? 12年的好朋友 |
| [16:48] | Well,it’s kind of weird,but,uh,I had this crazy dream the other night. | 感觉很奇怪 但是我昨晚做了个疯狂的梦 |
| [16:54] | It’s a little embarrassing. | 真令人尴尬 |
| [16:55] | You can tell us,Ted. This is a safe space. | 你可以告诉我们 Ted 这里很安全 |
| [16:58] | ah,your feelings are perfectly natural,buddy. | 你的感觉是很正常的 伙计 |
| [17:01] | Okay. Here’s what happened. So I’m at… | 好吧 事情是这样的 那么我当时在… |
| [17:05] | And then I proceeded to waste a half hour of those bastards’ lives, | 于是我浪费了这俩混蛋半小时的时间 |
| [17:08] | telling them about this dream I had | 告诉他们我的梦 |
| [17:10] | where I ate dinner with my top five favorite architects throughout history. | 梦里我跟最喜欢的5位建筑师一起吃饭 |
| [17:13] | And then,at the end of the meal,Frank Gehry slides the check over to I.M.Pei, | 最后吃完饭 Frank Gehry把账单推给I.M.Pei |
| [17:18] | and he says,Buddy,tonight,your name is I.M.Paying. | 他说 伙计 今晚你就是”付账先生”了 (与其名字谐音) |
| [17:24] | Buckminster Fuller almost did a spit take. | Buckminster Fuller差点喷饭了 |
| [17:28] | And then I woke up. | 然后我就醒了 |
| [17:32] | So,that-that’s it? | 那么 就这样? |
| [17:34] | No other dreams? | 没做别的梦? |
| [17:36] | – Nothing confusing or erotic? – Nope. | – 迷乱或者色情的梦呢? – 没有 |
| [17:41] | Okay,how about this? | 好吧 这么说吧 |
| [17:43] | Ted,you know how at some point in the future,machines will rise up against us? | Ted 你知道未来的某天 机器会统治人类? |
| [17:46] | – Sure. – Okay.So,the machines– | – 当然 – 好吧 那么机器– |
| [17:49] | they’ve killed everybody, | 它们摧毁了全人类 |
| [17:50] | and all that’s left is you,me,and Barney. | 只剩下你和我 还有Barney |
| [17:58] | Which one of us would you,like… | 你会选哪一个 就像是… |
| [18:02] | get with? | 一起生活? |
| [18:05] | And,um… | |
| [18:07] | why do I have to get with one of you? | 我为啥要跟你们其中一个生活? |
| [18:10] | The machines are forcing you. | 那些机器强迫你 |
| [18:11] | They want to watch. That’s just how they get down. | 它们想要围观一下 它们就这个风格 |
| [18:14] | Oh,that’s a… that’s a… That’s a tough one. | 哦 那真是… 真是…真是个难题 |
| [18:17] | I guess it would have to be… | 我想如果非得选的话… |
| [18:22] | Holly. | 选Holly |
| [18:25] | Robin told me what you guys did. | Robin告诉我短信是你们发的 |
| [18:26] | That’s why I made up the gay dreams thing. | 这就是为何我编造了同性恋春梦的事 |
| [18:28] | Uh,guys,this is Holly. | 伙计们 这就是Holly |
| [18:31] | And I didn’t wait your precious three days to call her. | 我没有按照你们说的 等上宝贵的三天再联系她 |
| [18:33] | I knew where she worked,so I tracked her down. | 我知道她工作的地方 便直接去找她 |
| [18:36] | Um,let me ask you. Did I call you too soon? | 让我来问问你 我给你打电话早了吗? |
| [18:38] | I loved that he called me right away. | 我喜欢他立马给我电话 |
| [18:40] | I found it very romantic. | 我觉得很浪漫 |
| [18:43] | And by the way,I don’t sit around my apartment reading architecture magazines | 顺便一提 我不会坐在公寓里读建筑杂志 |
| [18:46] | in my old cheerleader uniform. | 还穿着我的旧拉拉队服 |
| [18:48] | I do that completely naked. | 我都是裸着的 |
| [18:55] | So,uh,Holly and I are going out to dinner. | 那么 我和Holly要出去吃晚餐了 |
| [18:57] | – I’ll meet you out front. – Okay. | – 我在门口等你 – 好的 |
| [19:01] | I’m sorr bud. We-We were just trying to help you. | 抱歉伙计 我们只是想要帮你 |
| [19:04] | And,also,it was really fun. | 而且 这很有趣 |
| [19:09] | I don’t need your help,okay? I can take care of myself. | 我不需要你们的帮助 好吧? 我自己能搞掂 |
| [19:13] | And,yeah,maybe… | 没错 也许… |
| [19:14] | maybe there are some girls who wouldn’t like it that I called them right away | 也许有些女孩子 不喜欢我立刻给她们打电话 |
| [19:17] | or said things too soon,but guess what? | 或者太早说爱她 但是知道吗? |
| [19:20] | Those aren’t the right girls for me. | 她们不是适合我的女孩 |
| [19:22] | Maybe the right girl is the one who loves that I do those thin | 也许适合我的女孩会喜欢我做的事 |
| [19:25] | because that’s just who I am,and I’m not going to change because of some stupid Three Days Rule. | 因为这才是我 我不会因为愚蠢的3日原则而改变自己 |
| [19:33] | Oh,and,um,Holly spells her name with an “I.” | 哦 还有Holly的名字其实是以”I”结尾的 |
| [19:39] | So I had proven that the Three Days Rule was wrong,and I was out to dinner with a pretty girl. | 我证明了3日法则是错误的 并和一个美女去吃晚餐 |
| [19:44] | And until right now,I’ve never told anyone the truth about what happened on that date. | 直到今日 我都没有跟人提过那晚发生了什么 |
| [19:49] | That’s so funny! I love indie music,too. | 太有趣了! 我也喜欢印度音乐 |
| [19:51] | We should get married. | 咱俩真该结婚 |
| [19:54] | Just kidding. Or am I? | 开玩笑的 或者我确实这么想的? |
| [19:57] | Just kidding again. | 还是开玩笑 |
| [19:59] | That’s it. We’re totally going to Brazil together! | 没错 我们真该一起去巴西! |
| [20:01] | And I went to my doctor this morning,and he said it is all cleared up,so I’m good to go. | 今早我去见了医生 他说我都康复了 我可以走了 |
| [20:06] | I think I’m in love with you,Ted. | 我想我爱上你了 Ted |
| [20:08] | In the end,I didn’t need to wait three days,but Holly really,really did. | 最后 我不需要等上3天 需要等的人是Holly |
| [20:13] | Like a lot of rules,there are times to follow them and times to not. | 正如许多的规矩一样 有时我们需要遵守 有时未必 |
| [20:17] | But I will tell you this. | 但我要告诉你们 |
| [20:19] | When I got your mother’s number,I called her right away. | 当我拿到你们老妈的号码 我立马打给了她 |
| [20:28] | – Stan! | – 嘿 伙计们 – Stan! – Hey,fellas. |
| [20:30] | – Stan,aren’t you working? – Took the night off. | – Stan 你不用上班? – 今晚休息 |
| [20:32] | – That’s great! We can all hang out! – Yeah. | – 太棒了! 咱们可以出去啦! – 没错 |
| [20:34] | Uh,I can’t. Got a date. | 不行 我有约了 |
| [20:36] | – You ready,baby? – Yup. | – 可以走了吗 宝贝? – 走吧 |
| [20:38] | What the… | 搞什么… |
| [20:40] | Wait,wait. Couldn’t you guys just stay here and do your date with us? | 等等 你们俩不能留下来 跟我们一起约会吗? |
| [20:43] | Yeah,it’ll be fun! Look,I’m laughing! | 没错 这会很有趣的! 看 我都在笑了! |
| [20:47] | It’s fun here! You like magic? | 这儿很有趣! 你喜欢魔术吗? |
| [20:49] | Fellas,it-it’s time we said good-bye. | 伙计们 我们该说再见了 |
| [20:53] | I mean,we shared a very special afternoon together,and that’s something I will always cherish. | 我们曾在一起度过一个愉快的下午 这是我不会忘记的趣事 |
| [20:57] | I’ll never forget you guys. | 我不会忘了你们的 |
| [21:00] | – Do you even know their mes? – No idea. Is the tall one Ted? | – 你知道他们的名字吗? – 不知道 那高个是Ted吗? |
| [21:02] | No. That’s Marshall. He’s married to Lily. | 不 那是Marshall 他跟Lily结婚了 |
| [21:05] | – Okay. You like chicken wings? – Oh,yeah. | – 好吧 你喜欢吃鸡翅吗? – 喜欢 |