| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Kids,back in 2009,your Aunt Robin was | 孩子们 2009年那会儿 你们Robin阿姨 |
| [00:00] | the year 2030 | 2030年 |
| [00:03] | the host of a morning show for local New York cable. | 在纽约地方有线台主持一档早间节目 |
| [00:05] | come on get up new york! | 早哇 纽约! |
| [00:05] | And it was on early. How early? | 而且还挺早的 有多早? |
| [00:09] | Mike? wakey,wakey. | Mike? 醒醒 |
| [00:13] | But then,everything changed. | 但之后 一切都不同了 |
| [00:16] | See my show? | 有看我的节目吗? |
| [00:17] | Oh,I meant to watch it. | 噢 我本来想看的 |
| [00:18] | I just got so busy with the whole “being sound asleep” thing. | 不过我忙着睡觉 腾不出时间 |
| [00:21] | It took all night,eight hours down the drain. | 花了我整晚功夫 八个小时就这么没了 |
| [00:23] | Oh,it’s fine. But get this: | 呃 没关系 你听着: |
| [00:26] | After the broadcast… | 我做完节目后… |
| [00:29] | – Are you Robin? – Yeah. | – Robin是吗? – 是我 |
| [00:31] | I’m Don,your new co-host. | 我叫Don 是你的新同事 |
| [00:33] | Don was Don Frank,seasoned veteran of no fewer than | Don全名Don Frank 曾活跃在全国 |
| [00:36] | 39 local morning news teams from all over the country. | 不下于39个地方早间新闻的老面孔 |
| [00:39] | The guy was an industry legend. | 这家伙就是传说中的哥 |
| [00:46] | You are so going to hit that. | 你有很大机会拿下他哦 |
| [00:48] | No,I just think we’re going to be great together on the air. | 不是 我只是想工作时我们会很融洽 |
| [00:51] | And on the sofa and on the bed and on the coffee table. | 并且在沙发 床上和咖啡桌上也很”融洽” |
| [00:54] | All right,all right. | 好啦 |
| [00:55] | I’m gonna go up on the roof and stand there by myself for five minutes. | 我要上天台 自己小站个五分钟 |
| [00:58] | Have fun. | 好好玩 |
| [00:59] | And that’s exactly what she did. | 就是这样 |
| [01:01] | She just stood there. | 她就这么站在那里 |
| [01:04] | All right,kids,I’m gonna level with you. | 好吧 孩子们 我说实话 |
| [01:06] | That’s not what she did. | 她没那么做 |
| [01:08] | Here’s what she did. | 这才是她真正所为 |
| [01:09] | All right,all right. | 好啦 |
| [01:11] | – I’m going to go have a cigarette. – What?! | – 我上去抽根烟 – 什么?! |
| [01:13] | I promised her I’d never tell you this, | 我跟她保证过不告诉你们的 |
| [01:15] | but once upon a time, your Aunt Robin did enjoy the occasional cigarette, | 很久之前 你们Robin阿姨偶尔会抽抽烟 |
| [01:19] | and occasionally that occasional cigarette… | 而这个”偶尔” |
| [01:22] | was more than just occasional. | 偶尔会超出”偶尔”的定义 |
| [01:28] | I just left something like this in my apartment. | 我家现在也有这么一玩意儿 |
| [01:30] | Robin,come on,take it to the roof. | Robin 别这样 上天台抽呀 |
| [01:32] | We said no smoking in the apartment | 之前你做掌上压烧掉了地毯 |
| [01:34] | after you torched the throw rug doing push-ups. | 我就跟你说过 室内不准吸烟 |
| [01:36] | All right,all right,all right. Geez. | 好啦好啦 唠叨 |
| [01:39] | Yeah,Robin,I mean,God,not only is that a filthy habit, | 就是 Robin 天 这不单单是个坏习惯 |
| [01:43] | but also,can I bum one? | 而且 给我一支好吗? |
| [01:45] | – Sure. – What?! | – 没问题 – 什么?! |
| [01:47] | how i met your mother s05e11 | |
| [02:00] | Kids,your Uncle Marshall definitely doesn’t want you to know this, | 孩子们 Marshall叔叔不想让你们知道 |
| [02:03] | but he also smoked off and on. | 但他也会偶尔吸烟 |
| [02:05] | It all started when he was 13,on a camping trip in Minnesota. | 故事发生在他13岁 是在明尼苏达州露营 |
| [02:08] | Come on,Marshall,let’s celebrate. It’s summer vacation. | 来嘛 Marshall 庆祝一下 难得的暑假 |
| [02:12] | Okay,but just one. | 好吧 就一支 |
| [02:15] | This is my first and last cigarette ever. | 这是我第一支 同时也是最后一支烟 |
| [02:18] | And that was the first of many,many “last cigarettes ever. | 而那只是众多”最后一支烟”中的第一次 |
| [02:22] | ” That’s it. I am done,I am out. | 够了 我要戒烟 |
| [02:25] | Last… Cigarette… …ev-arrh! | 这是我… 最后… …一支烟! |
| [02:28] | So,by that point,I’d heard it all before. | 所以 那时 他说的都是以前的陈词滥调 |
| [02:31] | Last cigaretteever. | 最后一支烟 |
| [02:32] | What are you doing? You haven’t smoked in six months. | 你怎么了? 你已经六个月没碰烟了 |
| [02:35] | Is this about the McRib? | 是不是因为麦当劳猪扒堡? |
| [02:37] | It’s gone,dude,let it go. | 它都被撤出菜单了 就让它过去吧 |
| [02:38] | I’m worried about work,okay? | 是因为工作 |
| [02:40] | They just hired a new head of the legal department, | 法律部来了个新头头 |
| [02:42] | and he’s going to be letting people go. | 他可是会裁员的 |
| [02:44] | So that’s why you’re worried? | 你就担心这个? |
| [02:46] | The new head of the legal department is Arthur Hobbes. | 法律部的新头头是Arthur Hobbes |
| [02:50] | As in “Artillery Arthur”? | 就是那个”大炮嘴Arthur”? |
| [02:52] | As in your former boss? | 你以前的上司? |
| [02:54] | Arthur Hobbes was the meanest boss Marshall or anyone else had ever had. | 不仅仅是Marshall Arthur Hobbes 绝对是每个人遇过最刻薄的上司 |
| [02:58] | The last time Marshall worked for him,it ended like this. | 以前Marshall在他手底下工作 最后变成这样 |
| [03:01] | I quit! | 老子不干了! |
| [03:03] | Yikes. | 恐怖 |
| [03:04] | So does he hold it against you? | 就这件事 他给你小鞋穿了? |
| [03:06] | Worse. | 宁愿这样 |
| [03:08] | I’m sorry,who are you? | 不好意思 你哪位? |
| [03:10] | I’m,I’m Marshall Eriksen. | 我是Marshall Eriksen |
| [03:13] | – Um,we had a fairly intense screaming match. – No. | – 我们曾经大吵过一架 – 没记忆 |
| [03:18] | Wherein I suggested that you take your head | 其中 我曾建议过您把脑袋摘下 |
| [03:20] | and store it within yourself in a fashion that, | 在身体里找一地方藏好 |
| [03:25] | while,while space-saving,might limit its exposure to,to sunshine. | 即能有效利用空间 又能避免阳光直射 (就是塞菊花里咯 真隐晦…) |
| [03:28] | Well,that describes 95% of my employees and everyone in my family… | 跟我手下95%的员工和我家里人很像… |
| [03:33] | except for my dog. | 除了我的狗 |
| [03:35] | He’s such a good boy. | 真是个好小伙 |
| [03:38] | Well… I’ll see you later,uh… | 晚点见吧 呃… |
| [03:41] | Randall Wilkerson. | Randall Wilkerson |
| [03:43] | Marshall Eriksen. | Marshall Eriksen |
| [03:45] | Gary Dinkersfield,right. | Gary Dinkersfield 没错 |
| [03:48] | Great,he doesn’t remember you. | 好哇 他不记得你了 |
| [03:50] | Not great. Arthur Hobbes hating Marshall– | 不好 Arthur Hobbes讨厌Marshall– |
| [03:52] | that’s no big deal. He hates everyone. | 那只是小事 他讨厌所有人 |
| [03:53] | It’s the people he doesn’t know that he cuts loose. | 他专炒他不认识的人 |
| [03:56] | He just fired What’s-His-Face. | 他刚炒了 那谁谁 |
| [03:59] | He fired What’s- His-Face,Ted,and What’s-His-Face was invaluable. | 他炒了那谁谁 Ted 那谁谁很能干的 |
| [04:02] | Look,I can understand you getting upset, | 你这么担忧我很理解 |
| [04:04] | but it’s not worth killing yourself over. | 但为此慢性自杀就不值得了 |
| [04:05] | Yeah,wait till you get laid off,then kill yourself. | 等你被炒鱿鱼了 再自杀 |
| [04:09] | Like What’s-His-Face. | 就像那谁谁 |
| [04:10] | Although I guess now it’s more like Where’s-His-Face. | 不过我想现在更应该是”那碎碎”了 (跳楼自杀!?) |
| [04:15] | Look,it was just two cigarettes. | 就两根烟 |
| [04:17] | Okay,I can handle two. | 两支没问题的 |
| [04:19] | As long as I don’t have three within 24 hours, | 只要在24小时内不吸第三支 |
| [04:21] | then I’m not going to get hooked again. | 那我就不会上瘾 |
| [04:23] | What’s Lily going to say when she finds out you smoked? | 要是被Lily发现你吸烟怎么办? |
| [04:26] | Lily’s not going to find out. | Lily不会发现啦 |
| [04:27] | I have a system. | 哥自有一套法子 |
| [04:29] | Ah,yes,Marshall’s system. | 没错 Marshall大法 |
| [04:44] | – Hey,Lil. – You smoked. | – 嘿 Lil – 你吸烟了 |
| [04:46] | Damn it! | 可恶! |
| [04:48] | The next morning,your Aunt Robin was thrilled | 第二天早上 你们Robin阿姨很兴奋 |
| [04:50] | to be finally going on the air with a real pro. | 她终于可以跟一位真正专业人士合作 |
| [04:52] | In three,two,one… | 三 二 一… |
| [04:56] | Hi,I’m Robin Scherbatsky. | 大家好 我是Robin Scherbatsky |
| [04:57] | AndI… am Don Frank. | 我…是Don Frank |
| [05:00] | Two teens were arrested late last night for stealing a police cart. | 两名少年昨夜因 偷窃一部警用手推车被捕 |
| [05:03] | No,I’m sorry,not a police cart,a policecar. | 不好意思 不是警用手推车 是警车 |
| [05:06] | Aw,screw it. | 随便啦 |
| [05:07] | Brain fart. | 脑子进水啦 |
| [05:09] | Don’t you hate those? | 真讨厌是吧? |
| [05:11] | Oh,look at that,the teleprompter’s still running. | 看 讲词提示机还在显示呢 |
| [05:14] | Something about a woman giving birth on an uptown bus. | 貌似有个女人在小区巴士上生小孩 |
| [05:17] | Well,no point in jumping in halfway. | 那是 你总不能中途跳出车吧 |
| [05:19] | I’ll just wait till it’s done. | 要我就等完事再下车 |
| [05:23] | and she cut the cord with a Metropass. | 而她还用地铁月票割开脐带 |
| [05:26] | We’ll be right back. | 稍后请继续收看 |
| [05:27] | And we’re clear. | 搞定 |
| [05:29] | What the hell was that? | 刚才怎么回事? |
| [05:30] | Don,you said “brain fart. | Don 你说”脑子进水” |
| [05:32] | ” Look,Robin,you seem like a nice kid,but this is my 39th local news show,okay? | 这样 Robin 看来你是个乖孩子 不过这是我第39个地方新闻节目 |
| [05:36] | And in that time,I’ve learned three things: | 从中 我学到三样东西: |
| [05:38] | avoid the all-you-can-eat sushi buffet in Bismarck, | 不要去俾斯麦 任何一间任吃寿司自助餐 |
| [05:40] | do not go to the bathroom with your lapel mic still on, | 微型麦克风还开着时 不要去洗手间 |
| [05:43] | and three,at this hour,your entire viewing audience | 第三 此时你的所有观众 |
| [05:46] | is one half-drunk slob sitting in his underwear,so… | 只是些喝得半醉的大汉 只穿着内裤 所以… |
| [05:49] | Back in five,four… | 五 四 … |
| [05:52] | Well,let’s do a great show for that half-drunk slob. | 那我们就为了那些醉汉做好节目吧 |
| [05:55] | Well,that half-drunk slob appreciates it. | 醉汉会感激你的 |
| [05:58] | The next day,Marshall found himself craving a cigarette. | 第二天Marshall发现自己烟瘾犯了 |
| [06:00] | It was driving him crazy,so he decided to get some fresh air. | 让他很难受 所以他决定上天台透透气 |
| [06:06] | Oh,no. You’re not up here to jump,are you? | 不是吧 你不是上来跳楼的吧? |
| [06:10] | – No,no,no,no. – I fired a lot of people today. | – 不 不是 – 我今天炒了不少人 |
| [06:12] | I don’t need another jumper in my file. | 我可不想档案里再加个再次害人跳楼了 |
| [06:16] | Oh,uh,cigarette? | 来一根? |
| [06:19] | No,no,thank you. | 不了 谢谢 |
| [06:21] | That’s too bad. | 真可惜 |
| [06:23] | You know what I miss,Jeffrey? | 真怀念以前 知道是什么吗? Jeffrey |
| [06:25] | Getting to know somebody over a smoke. | 从吸烟打屁中了解对方 |
| [06:27] | People are so interchangeable now, | 现在的人都太善变了 |
| [06:30] | but you share a butt with somebody,you got a real bond. | 不过要是大家一起吸过烟 那就是哥们 |
| [06:37] | You know what? I will,I will take one. | 我 我还是来一根吧 |
| [06:39] | Okay. Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [06:41] | I’m Marshall,by the way,it’s Marshall,Marshall Eriksen. | 我叫Marshall 顺便 我叫Marshall Marshall Eriksen |
| [06:44] | Yeah. Tell me something,Marshall Eriksen. | 告诉我Marshall Eriksen |
| [06:47] | How would you like to see a picture of the cutest dog in the world? | 要不要看看世上最可爱的狗狗? |
| [06:52] | There he is. He’s a good boy. | 就是他 好小伙 |
| [07:00] | You smoked. | 你抽烟了 |
| [07:02] | S Yes,I smoked,and it was my third of the day. | 没错我抽烟了 而且是我今天第三根 |
| [07:05] | You know what that means? I’m a smoker now. It’s all over. | 知道那代表什么? 我现在是个烟民 全完了 |
| [07:08] | I even bought a pack on the way home | 回家时我甚至还买了一包 |
| [07:10] | and a lighter and a Vikings lamp, | 还有打火机 和Vikings的台灯 |
| [07:12] | which has nothing to do with anything, but I saw it in the window and I liked it. | 虽然没什么关系 不过我路过窗边看见 很喜欢 |
| [07:14] | Damn it,Marshall. | 可恶 Marshall |
| [07:16] | We already have four Viking lamps and smoking kills. | 家里已经有四个Viking台灯和戒烟贴了 |
| [07:20] | It was a way to bond with my boss,okay? | 我只是想藉此跟上司打好关系 |
| [07:22] | You should have seen me up there. | 你都没见我做了什么 |
| [07:24] | – That is a cute dog. – Yeah. | – 这狗真可爱 – 是啊 |
| [07:25] | – Are those your kids? – Yeah,yeah,whatever. | – 那些是你孩子? – 是吧 随便吧 |
| [07:28] | Hey,oh,look what I got at the mall. | 这是我从商场买的 |
| [07:35] | There he is. There he is. | 就是他 就是他 |
| [07:36] | – Go ahead,you can pet him now. – No. | – 来 拍拍他的头 – 不了 |
| [07:39] | Yeah,yeah,come on,he likes it. | 来嘛 他很喜欢的 |
| [07:43] | Scratch him under the chin. | 逗逗他的下巴 |
| [07:47] | I don’t care what your reasons are. | 我不管你什么理由 |
| [07:48] | You know how I feel about smoking. | 你知道我对吸烟什么看法的 |
| [07:50] | Now,give me the cigarettes. | 香烟给我 |
| [07:56] | And the lighter. | 还有打火机 |
| [08:08] | Ah,that’s the stuff. | 爽死了 |
| [08:10] | – What?! – Oh,yeah,add your Aunt Lily to the list. | – 什么?! – 没错 你们Lily阿姨也是烟鬼 |
| [08:14] | Whenever Uncle Marshall fell off the wagon, | 不管Marshall叔叔做什么 |
| [08:16] | your Aunt Lily got dragged right down with him. | 你们Lily阿姨总是嫁鸡随鸡 嫁狗随狗 |
| [08:19] | What you doing? | 你在干嘛? |
| [08:21] | If you must know,I am reaching out to City Hall | 要是你真要知道 我在跟市政厅联系 |
| [08:23] | to try to get the mayor on our show. | 看能不能请市长过来做节目 |
| [08:25] | Oh,my goodness,you are adorable, | 我的天 你真可爱 |
| [08:28] | but the mayor’s not coming on a show nobody watches. | 不过要是节目没观众 市长才不会来呢 |
| [08:30] | My colonoscopy had more viewers than this show. | 我做个结肠镜检查都比这节目观众多 |
| [08:34] | At least that had some twists and turns. | 起码那内窥镜还比较峰回路转呢 |
| [08:35] | You know,I don’t,I don’t know why you’re acting like this. | 我不知道你为什么会这样 |
| [08:38] | Maybe you’re just bitter because you ne ver had a shot at a network job, | 你这么刻薄可能是 因为你没机会爬上电视网工作 |
| [08:41] | but I think I still do,so I really need to focus. | 但我认为我还有希望 所以我要专心 |
| [08:43] | I’ve been on a network. | 我在电视网做过 |
| [08:47] | You were on a network? | 你在电视网做过? |
| [08:48] | It was the best Labor Day weekend of my life. | 那是我一生中最棒的劳动节假期 |
| [08:52] | When you do the news,you’re in these ergonomic chairs. | 你坐着完全符合人体工学的椅子做新闻 |
| [08:55] | It feels like you’re sitting on a cloud. | 就好像坐在云端一样 |
| [08:57] | Which was nice ’cause it was right after my colonoscopy. | 感觉很棒 因为我刚做完结肠镜检查 |
| [09:00] | And the dressing rooms? | 还有化妆间 |
| [09:02] | There’s dressing rooms? | 那里有化妆间? |
| [09:03] | Oh,you bet your sweet headset there’s dressing rooms,Mike. | 以你那可爱的耳机起誓 那里当然有化妆间 Mike |
| [09:06] | No changing in the KFC bathroom across the street. | 与街边KFC一模一样的洗手间 |
| [09:08] | No,sir. | 完全一模一样 |
| [09:10] | CB SIt was heaven. | 那就是天堂 |
| [09:13] | But the second you get used to it, | 一旦你已经习惯之后 |
| [09:15] | they go find someone who isn’t “going through a bitter divorce” | 他们就会找个没有”离婚烦恼” |
| [09:17] | and doesn’t “reek of gin,” | 或者不是”一身酒气”的人来代替你 |
| [09:20] | and before you know it,you’re stuck in a dead-end gig, | 最后你发现 你被困在个没出路的节目 |
| [09:22] | surrounded by people going nowhere,doing the news in your tighty whities. | 周围都是无所事事的人 穿着紧身白内裤做新闻 |
| [09:28] | Okay,the underwear thing was your choice, | 这样 穿内裤是你自己的问题 |
| [09:31] | and I don’t like that it’s catching on. | 而且我搞不明白为什么就流行起来了 |
| [09:33] | Ah,looking good,fellas. | 啊 帅啊 兄弟 |
| [09:35] | Feels good,right? | 感觉不错是吧? |
| [09:37] | God,I want to kill him. | 我真想干掉他 |
| [09:38] | Of course people watch the show. | 当然有人看我的节目 |
| [09:39] | You guys watch the show,that’s,like,two right there. | 你们会看我的节目 这样就有两个 |
| [09:44] | Oh,my God. | 不是吧 |
| [09:45] | You guys still haven’t seen my show. | 你们居然还没看过我的节目 |
| [09:48] | – What? We never miss it. – We’ve seen it! | – 什么? 我们每集必追的 – 我们看过! |
| [09:50] | Really? What color is the set? | 真的? 背景是什么颜色? |
| [09:56] | – It’s black. – Right. Yeah. | – 黑色 – 没错 |
| [09:57] | – With,like,silver Uh-huh. around the edges. – Yeah. | – 有银色的边缘 – 是啊 |
| [09:59] | Not your TV set,my show set. | 不是电视的背景 是摄影场的背景 |
| [10:03] | God,if I can’t even get my best friends to watch,who’s going to watch? | 要是我的好朋友都不看 那还有谁会看? |
| [10:07] | Lots of people. | 有好多人会看 |
| [10:08] | Uh,you got bedridden insomniacs. | 卧床不起的失眠症患者 |
| [10:11] | Bums camping outside a department store. | 在百货商店外扎营的流浪汉 |
| [10:14] | People waiting in the ER,where the TV is in a cage, | 在急症室外等候的人 那里的电视机放在架子上 |
| [10:18] | so you can’t change the channel. | 你没法换频道 |
| [10:20] | Ooh,do you have any stalkers? | 你有粉丝吗? |
| [10:22] | Yeah,but even Leonard won’t watch my show. | 嗯 但是连Leonard都不看我的节目 |
| [10:26] | I can’t believe those guys are smoking out there. | 真不敢相信他们在外面抽烟 |
| [10:28] | It’s freezing out. | 外面冷死了 |
| [10:29] | Remember when you used to be able to smoke in bars? | 还记得那时候你在酒吧里吸烟吗? |
| [10:33] | Oh,hey,dude. I think that hot girl over there’s smiling at me. | 嘿 哥们 我觉得那边的辣妹在朝我笑 |
| [10:36] | Uh,that’s a chair. But yeah,dude,hit that. | 那是个椅子 不过去上吧 |
| [10:40] | Guys? | 伙计们? |
| [10:42] | Marco! | Marco! |
| [10:44] | Polo! | Polo! (Marco Polo游泳池里的游戏) |
| [10:45] | Well,it’s dividing our group into smokers and non-smokers. | 它把我们分割成吸烟者和非吸烟者 |
| [10:49] | And that’s not healthy. | 加之吸烟有害健康 |
| [10:50] | You’re right. | 说得对 |
| [10:53] | Let’s go have a smoke. | 我们去抽烟吧 |
| [10:54] | What?! | 啥?! |
| [10:56] | Yeah,I’m not proud of it. | 我不是引以为傲 |
| [10:57] | Look at you two. Smokers. | 瞧瞧你俩 烟鬼 |
| [11:00] | Just like the rest of us. | 跟我们一样 |
| [11:06] | I am not a smoker. | 我可不是烟鬼 |
| [11:07] | I only smoke in certain situations. | 我只是在特定情况下才吸烟 |
| [11:10] | Postcoital,when I’m with Germans– | 嘿咻后 和德国佬一起时 |
| [11:13] | sometimes those two overlap– | 有时这两者交叉 |
| [11:15] | coital,birthdays,to annoy my mom, | 嘿咻时 生日时 惹我妈生气时 |
| [11:20] | precoital,on a sailboat, | 嘿咻前 在帆船上时 |
| [11:22] | the day the Mets are mathematically eliminated every year,and,of course– | 每年大都会队惨遭淘汰的那天 还有 |
| [11:26] | wait for it,’cause Lord knows I have– | 等一下 天知道我为啥有 |
| [11:28] | pregnancy scares. | 怀孕恐惧症 |
| [11:31] | Why are you smoking right now? | 那你现在为啥抽烟? |
| [11:32] | I’m always precoital,Ted. | 我一直处于嘿咻前 Ted |
| [11:35] | You know,maybe smoking’s not so bad. | 也许抽烟没那么糟 |
| [11:37] | I mean,at least it gets us out in the fresh air. | 我是说 至少能让我们 出来呼吸新鲜空气 |
| [11:40] | Yeah,and all the coughing really works my abs. | 嗯 咳嗽能锻炼腹肌 |
| [11:44] | I… am… ripped! | 我…好…健美! |
| [11:47] | But,as glamorous as it was,within a week,we all hit our breaking point. | 尽管欲罢不能 不过一周后 我们都几乎崩溃 |
| [11:53] | You okay,sweetie? | 你没事吧 宝贝? |
| [11:55] | Actually,baby,my throat’s a bit sore. | 宝贝 其实我的喉咙有点痛 |
| [12:07] | three flights later… | 三层楼梯后 |
| [12:17] | – So,I’m whapping him across the nose with the newspaper,right? – Yeah. | – 我用报纸猛��他耳光 对吧? – 嗯 |
| [12:20] | And my wife says,”Come on,you can’t treat your son like that. | 我老婆说”住手 你不能这样对待自己儿子” |
| [12:24] | ” I don’t know. | 我不清楚 |
| [12:27] | Michael,call 911. Oh… | Michael 打911 |
| [12:30] | oh,my God. Okay,yes,yeah,right away. | 我的天 好好 马上 |
| [12:33] | It’s Marshall,by the way. | 顺带一提 我是Marshall |
| [12:41] | Oh,my God. I hope Arthur’s okay. | 我的天 希望Arthur没事 |
| [12:44] | Dibs on his office if he’s not. | 要是他出事 他的办公室就归我了 |
| [12:46] | We have to quit smoking. | 我们得戒烟 |
| [12:48] | Honey,you said a mouthful. | 亲爱的 你说得对 |
| [12:50] | I wish I had never started. | 真希望我从没上手过 |
| [12:51] | I mean,I think back to myself at 13 years old. | 我想回到13岁那会儿 |
| [12:55] | If I could only go back to that moment… | 要是能回到那时候 |
| [13:04] | I hate that little bastard. | 我恨那只小赤佬 |
| [13:06] | Me,too. | 我也是 |
| [13:08] | Okay,that’s it. Let’s quit. | 好吧 就这么办 我们戒烟 |
| [13:11] | Let’s… Let’s do it. | 我们戒烟 |
| [13:12] | Well,I am proud of you guys. | 我真为你们感到自豪 |
| [13:15] | I have heard how difficult it is for smokers like yourself to quit, | 我听说过像你们这样的烟民 戒烟有多难 |
| [13:19] | so,on behalf of nonsmokers,I salute you,and I am here to help. | 我代表不吸烟的同志向你们致敬 同时我在这里提供帮助 |
| [13:23] | So,hand in your cigarettes,and I will get rid of them one at a time. | 所以上交你们的烟 我会一根一根地扔掉 |
| [13:27] | You’re quitting,dollface. | 你也戒烟 萝莉脸 |
| [13:29] | I know I don’t normally call you dollface, | 我知道我通常不叫你萝莉脸 |
| [13:31] | but it kind of works in this voice. | 但用这嗓子说真有味 |
| [13:33] | Dollface. | 萝莉脸 |
| [13:35] | – Hey,guys. – Hey. | – 嘿 各位 – 嘿 |
| [13:36] | Uh,I was just wondering,um,is anyone else | 我想知道明天还有谁会 |
| [13:39] | interviewing the mayor tomorrow on TV,or is it just me? | 在电视上采访市长? 除了我之外 |
| [13:43] | Hey,that’s great. | 嘿 真棒 |
| [13:45] | Yeah,Don can suck it while I suck this. | 我出风头的时候 Don就一边凉快去吧 |
| [13:47] | Light me,Marshall. | 帮我点上 Marshall |
| [13:49] | Actually,um,we’ve decided that we’re all quitting smoking. | 其实我们都决定戒烟了 |
| [13:52] | That’s fantastic. | 妙极 |
| [13:54] | I’m sick of you guys bumming my cigarettes. | 我很讨厌你们老揩油我的烟 |
| [13:56] | No,come on,Robin. We-we can’t do it unless we all do it together. | 拜托 Robin 要是不同心协力 我们就戒不了烟 |
| [13:59] | No. | 不行 |
| [14:00] | You can sleep with Marshall. | 你可以和Marshall上床 |
| [14:02] | Oh,God,Lily,no. | 我的妈 Lily 别啊 |
| [14:04] | Sorry,baby,you got to take one for the team. | 抱歉 宝贝 你得为团队牺牲一下 |
| [14:06] | I-I don’t want to sleep with Marshall. | 我才不想和Marshall上床 |
| [14:08] | – I’ve seen the looks. – Right. | – 我能从表情上得知 – 对的 |
| [14:10] | I can’t quit right now. | 我现在没法戒 |
| [14:12] | Not before the biggest interview of my life. | 在一生中最重要的采访之前 戒不了 |
| [14:14] | It’s-it’s too stressful. | 压力太大了 |
| [14:15] | It’s too stressful! | 压力太大了 |
| [14:16] | – Let’s just have one more. – Give me a cigarette!! | – 再抽一根 – 给我烟!! |
| [14:18] | No,wait! Robin,Robin,think about this for a second. | 不 等下! Robin Robin 仔细想想 |
| [14:20] | Bloomberg is the antismoking mayor. | Bloomberg市长提倡禁烟 |
| [14:23] | Do you really want to show up to that interview smelling like smoke? | 你想采访的时候满身烟味吗? |
| [14:25] | It’d be like interviewing a vegetarian smelling like a McRib. | 就象采访满身猪排堡味的素食主义者 |
| [14:28] | Really? Like I’m not going through enough right now? | 是吗? 那我现在不能抽到爽了? |
| [14:31] | Look,you’re quitting. We’re all quitting. | 听着 你要戒烟 我们都要戒烟 |
| [14:37] | Fine. I’ll quit. | 好吧 我戒 |
| [14:38] | Great. Great. We just have to get through the first 24 hours. | 很好 我们只要熬过24小时 |
| [14:41] | After that,it’s a cakewalk. | 之后就小菜一碟了 |
| [14:43] | 26 hours later | 26小时后 |
| [14:44] | Barney,do you have to bite your nails so loud? | Barney 你有必要把指甲啃那么响吗? |
| [14:47] | I’m not biting my nails. | 我不是在啃指甲 |
| [14:48] | I’m trying to suck the leftover nicotine out of my fingertips. | 我在用力吸指尖残留的尼古丁 |
| [14:52] | Marshall,can you pass the onion rings? | Marshall 你能递一下洋葱圈吗? |
| [14:53] | What,you got dinosaur arms? They’re right there. | 咋 你是恐龙爪子吗? 它们就在这儿 |
| [14:56] | What do you think cigarettes are doing right now? | 你们觉得香烟这会在做啥呢? |
| [14:57] | You think they’re thinking about us? | 你们觉得它们在想我们吗? |
| [15:00] | Dude,if you don’t stop tapping your foot,it’s coming off. | 老兄 你的腿再抖就散架了 |
| [15:03] | Oh,my God,Ted,I’m so sorry. | 我的天哪 Ted 真对不起 |
| [15:06] | Maybe I should move it a little bit closer to your ass! | 看来我该往你臀部踹上两脚! |
| [15:09] | All right. I am ready to do this right now! | 好吧 我现在就想动手了! |
| [15:11] | None of us knew what we were fighting about. | 鬼才知道我们在吵啥 |
| [15:13] | We just knew we wanted to smoke. | 我们只想抽一口 |
| [15:15] | More than anything in the world. | 别无他求 |
| [15:24] | It wasn’t going very well for Robin,either. | Robin也同样不好过 |
| [15:26] | Sorry I’m late. | 抱歉我迟到了 |
| [15:28] | Someone used the microwave,and the elevator stopped. | 有人用微波炉 所以电梯停了 |
| [15:32] | – What are you doing? – Okay,Don,Don,seriously,not tonight. | – 在干吗呢? – Don 说真的 今晚安分点 |
| [15:35] | Okay,I’m a little bit on edge because I quit smoking for my interview with the mayor,so just… | 我有些烦躁 为了采访市长 我把烟戒了 所以… |
| [15:40] | Oh,you precious little porcelain unicorn,you. | 你还真稀世罕见的小怪胎 |
| [15:44] | Why would you do that? | 你为啥要这么做? |
| [15:46] | Why?! Because I care,Don. | 为什么?! 因为我在乎 Don |
| [15:50] | I-I care about the show,I-I care about my career. | 我在意这个节目 我在意我的工作 |
| [15:53] | Unlike you,you unprofessional jerk! | 不象你 混日子的喽��! |
| [15:55] | You’re-You’re sloppy,you’re rude, | 你 你又邋遢又粗鲁 |
| [15:58] | and I wish you worked half as hard as | 你要是有弹力三角裤上 |
| [16:00] | the elastic on those stretched-out underpants. | 橡皮筋的一半努力就好了 |
| [16:04] | I’m starting to feel like this is getting a little personal. | 我觉得这有点人身攻击的味道 |
| [16:06] | No,Don,it would be getting personal | 不 Don 如果我说 |
| [16:07] | if I would say that the reason you bounce | 你老是从东家换到西家的原因 |
| [16:09] | from market to market is because you’re a loser– | 是因为你是个败类 |
| [16:12] | a lazy,obnoxious,loser. | 懒到生虫的可恨败类 |
| [16:19] | The mayor canceled. | 市长取消了 |
| [16:20] | In five,four,three,two… 5 4 3 2… | |
| [16:28] | Hi,I’m Robin Scherbatsky. | 嗨 我是Robin Scherbatsky |
| [16:30] | You think I’m a loser? | 你觉得我是败类? |
| [16:31] | You’re’ right. I’m a loser. | 你说得对 我是败类 |
| [16:33] | But at least I’ve accepted it. | 但至少我敢于承认 |
| [16:35] | A plucky raccoon has been cheering up patients at a local senior center. | 一只勇敢浣熊在老人中心 给病人们带来欢乐 |
| [16:39] | I used to be just like that. | 我以前也像你一样 |
| [16:40] | Always wanting more and never getting it. | 期望着有所回报 但总是事与愿违 |
| [16:43] | It’s a dead end,Robin. | 穷途末路了 Robin |
| [16:46] | You’re never going to be a network anchor. | 你永远成不了新闻联播主持人 |
| [16:48] | Just like you’re never going to quit smoking. | 正如你永远戒不了烟一样 |
| [16:51] | What are you doing? | 你在干吗? |
| [16:53] | I’m enjoying a cigarette. | 享受吞云吐雾的快感 |
| [16:55] | Oh,that’ll get you there. | 喔 快活赛神仙 |
| [16:58] | Oh,that’s good. | 感觉真妙 |
| [17:00] | You want a drag? | 来一口吗? |
| [17:01] | Can we be professionals? Please? | 能专业点吗? 拜托? |
| [17:03] | Yeah. Yeah,professionals? | 对对 专业? |
| [17:04] | You know who’s working the camera right now? | 你知道谁在摄像吗? |
| [17:06] | A chair. | 一把椅子 |
| [17:08] | We’re on a show where we can’t even get the cameraman to watch. | 我们的节目甚至没有摄像师观看 |
| [17:11] | That’s why the mayor canceled,Robin. | 所以市长取消采访 Robin |
| [17:12] | And that’s why Mike is on a fried chicken run. | 所以Mike溜出去吃炸鸡 |
| [17:15] | And that’s why you and I can enjoy a cigarette right here on the air. | 所以我和你能在直播时抽烟 |
| [17:20] | No,thank you. | 不 谢了 |
| [17:21] | Why? | 为什么? |
| [17:23] | Because of our millions and millions of impressionable viewers? | 因为我们数之不尽的敏感观众? |
| [17:25] | Okay… | 好吧 |
| [17:27] | If any impressionable viewers have a problem with this,please give us a call. | 要是任何敏感的观众对此有意见 请拨打电话 |
| [17:30] | The number’s on the screen. | 号码在屏幕上 |
| [17:35] | Chirp,chirp? Chirp,chirp? | 铃铃铃 铃铃铃? |
| [17:38] | Come on,Robin… live a little. | 拜托 Robin…活出自我本色 |
| [17:52] | Oh,that must be Mike. He always forgets– extra crispy. | 肯定是Mike 他老是忘记”劲脆鸡腿堡” |
| [17:56] | – Hello? – Robin,don’t smoke that cigarette! | – 喂? – Robin 别抽那烟! |
| [17:58] | – Marshall?! – We’re all watching and we’re all very impressionable. | – Marshall?! – 我们都在看 还有我们都很敏感 |
| [18:01] | And I swear to God,if you smoke that cigarette,we’re all going to smoke. | 我向毛主席发誓 要是你一抽 我们都会去抽 |
| [18:07] | You… You guys are watching? | 你们…你们在看? |
| [18:09] | We sure are,sweetheart,and you look fabulous. | 当然啦 宝贝 你好美 |
| [18:13] | Oh,you guys. | 伙计们 |
| [18:15] | You don’t have to do this,Robin. You don’t have to smoke. | 你没必要这么做 Robin 你没必要抽 |
| [18:17] | Resist it,honey. | 忍住 亲爱的 |
| [18:20] | Thanks for the call,guys. | 谢谢你们的电话 伙计们 |
| [18:25] | – Oh,she did it! – Good for her. | – 她忍住了! – 真好 |
| [18:27] | We’re not going to smoke. | 我们不会抽烟的 |
| [18:32] | I have a pack stashed up on the roof. | 我在屋顶上藏了盒烟 |
| [18:38] | Uh-oh. I’m awake. And I’m smoking! | 我醒了 我抽着烟 |
| [18:43] | Robin,you know how dangerous it is to wake a sleep smoker? | Robin 你知道吵醒睡着的烟民多危险吗? |
| [18:47] | – It’s fine. – I bought a pack on my way home. | 没关系啦 我在回家的路上也买了包 |
| [18:51] | – Hey,great show,Robin. – Yeah. | – 嘿 节目真不错 Robin – 嗯 |
| [18:53] | Yeah,but that Don guy,what a tool. | 嗯 那个叫Don的家伙好蠢 |
| [18:56] | Well,no,he actually apologized to me. | 没 他已经向我道歉了 |
| [18:58] | No,I mean when he stood up. | 不是 我是说他站起来时 |
| [19:00] | Those briefs were pretty revealing. | 三角裤包裹下若隐若现 |
| [19:02] | You should date that guy. | 你该和他约会 |
| [19:03] | Yeah. Not in this lifetime. | 嗯 下辈子吧 |
| [19:05] | They were dating within two months. | 2个月内他们就约会了 |
| [19:07] | But more on that later. | 那是后话 |
| [19:09] | Hey,guys,look,the sun’s coming up. | 嘿 瞧 太阳升起来了 |
| [19:15] | You know what right now is a perfect time for? | 你们知道现在做啥的最佳时机吗? |
| [19:17] | A last cigarette ever. | 最后一支烟 |
| [19:19] | No,I mean,a real last cigarette ever. | 不是 我是说真正的最后一支烟 |
| [19:26] | Damn it,let’s do it. | 我靠 大家来吧 |
| [19:29] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [19:30] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [19:32] | Last cigarette ever on,uh,on the count of three. | 最后一支烟 数到3 |
| [19:36] | – One… Two… – Three. – 1…2… – 3… | |
| [19:40] | **** | 之后我们都戒了一段时间 |
| [19:42] | **** anyone’s last cigarette | 但那都不是我们的最后一支烟 |
| [19:44] | we did eventually all quit smoking for real. | 我们最终都彻底把烟戒了 |
| [19:47] | Robin’s last cigarette was in June 2013. | Robin的最后一支烟是在2013年6月 |
| [19:51] | Barney’s last cigarette was in March 2017. | Barney的最后一支烟是在2017年3月 |
| [19:55] | Lily’s last cigarette was the day she started trying to get pregnant. | Lily的最后一支烟是 在计划要宝宝的那天 |
| [20:00] | And Marshall’s last cigarette was the day his son was born. | Marshall的最后一支烟是在他儿子出生那天 |
| [20:04] | And my last cigarette? | 我的呢? |
| [20:05] | Two weeks into dating your mother. | 是在和你们老妈约会2周后 |
| [20:08] | And I never looked back. | 我再也没有复吸 |
| [20:21] | aaa | 真抱歉揍了你一顿 |
| [20:23] | bbb | 作为弥补 |
| [20:25] | ccc | 我把这个送给你 |
| [20:28] | ddd | 哇 她好辣 |
| [20:30] | eee | 嗯 有朝一日你会娶她 |
| [20:34] | fff | 不可能 |
| [20:35] | ggg | 运气爆棚 |
| [20:37] | hhh | 就是说 |
| [20:40] | iii | 我进帐篷了 |
| [20:43] | jjj | 别 等下 别那么做 |
| [20:53] | kkk | 替我玩得愉快 |
| [20:55] | how i met your mother s05e11 |