| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | **y of my stories I’m a starry-eyed romantic on a noble search for true love. | 孩子们 在许多故事里我都是个空想浪漫主义者 不屈不挠地寻找真爱 |
| [00:06] | In this one,I’m just a jerk. | 但在这个故事中 我只是一混蛋 |
| [00:09] | Well,guys,tonight is the night. | 朋友们 就是今晚了 |
| [00:12] | to see my antique camera collection. | 我将邀请Tiffany来家里欣赏 我收藏的古董相机 |
| [00:17] | It’s Ted’s bait. | 那是Ted的诱饵 |
| [00:18] | “Bait”? | “诱饵”? |
| [00:18] | A true gentleman invents a pretense to lure an honorable lady into his apartment. | 一个真正的绅士想出来的一个幌子 用来引诱一位尊贵的女士进入他的公寓 |
| [00:23] | Some item of interest or beauty you can both pretend | 在她上了你的贼船前五分钟内 |
| [00:26] | to admire for five minutes before she hops on your disco stick. | 你可以假装喜欢的一种有趣或美丽的事物 |
| [00:29] | Like she’s coming up to “borrow a book” or “check out an album on vinyl. | 比如让她来”借本书” “听听老唱片” |
| [00:33] | ” Or to see your new rap poster. | 或者”看看你新的饶舌歌手海报” |
| [00:35] | “Rap poster”? | “饶舌歌手海报”? |
| [00:36] | Who would that work on? | 谁会上那种当? |
| [00:38] | It was the first week of college. | 那是在大学的第一周 |
| [00:39] | I was really into Wu-Tang Clan. | 我当时很爱”武当派” (史上最著名的嘻哈团体之一 90年代雄霸美国东岸饶舌乐界) |
| [00:42] | Yeah,bait is tricky. | 是啊 如何下”诱饵”是有技术含量的 |
| [00:44] | It has to be something interesting enough to get the girl upstairs, | 要足够有趣 把女生骗上楼 |
| [00:47] | but not so interesting that it overpowers the night. | 但假如它在晚上占了主导地位 那就没那么有趣了 |
| [00:49] | BARNEY: I found that a slot machine was too fun. | 例如老虎机就好玩过头了 |
| [00:55] | And a trampoline… | 而蹦床 |
| [00:58] | turned out to be too dangerous. | 又过于危险了 |
| [01:01] | But then I found the perfect bait: a teacup pig. | 但是后来我发现了最完美的诱饵: 一只迷你猪 |
| [01:07] | “A teacup pig”? | “迷你猪”? |
| [01:09] | Who’s that working on? | 谁又会上那种当? |
| [01:10] | You have a teacup pig?! | 你有迷你猪?! |
| [01:11] | – I didn’t know you had a teacup pig! – Can we see the teacup pig?! | – 我都不知道你有只迷你猪! – 我们能看看迷你猪吗?! |
| [01:14] | – Hey,can I borrow your teacup pig? – Yes,you can borrow my teacup pig. | – 能把你的迷你猪借我吗? – 行吧 朕借你了 |
| [01:17] | You have a teacup pig?!Oh,my gosh! | 你居然有只迷你猪! 苍天啊! |
| [01:19] | I can’t believe you have a teacup pig! | 我不敢相信你居然有只迷你猪! |
| [01:20] | You’re just so cute! | 你是在太可爱了! |
| [01:21] | Yes,you are the cutest piggy ever! | 是的 你是最最可爱的小猪猪了 |
| [01:24] | What? | 什么? |
| [01:26] | Were you always this pretty? | 你总是这么可爱吗? |
| [01:27] | Or are you going to give me that whole, | 你是不是要跟我说那套台词 |
| [01:28] | “Oh,in high school I was really shy and awkward” line? | “噢 高中里我可害羞可笨了” |
| [01:31] | I was shy and awkward. | 我确实害羞又笨 |
| [01:33] | I was,like,a hundred pounds heavier and I had these crazy buck teeth. | 当时比现在胖几百斤 还有大暴牙 |
| [01:36] | Seriously? | 你说真的? |
| [01:37] | No,I’ve always been hot. | 不 我一直都这么漂亮 |
| [01:39] | What are you going to do? | 能有什么法子呢 |
| [01:44] | Do you know who else would love this teacup pig? | 你知道还有谁也爱这迷你猪吗? |
| [01:48] | My boyfriend. | 我的男朋友 |
| [01:55] | how.i.met.your.mother. Season 05 Episode 16 | |
| [02:04] | You have a boyfriend? | 你有男友了? |
| [02:05] | Ugh,I know. | 呃 我知道 |
| [02:07] | So annoying,right? | 真烦人 对吧 |
| [02:08] | I mean,he’s not really my boyfriend. | 我是说 他不算是我的男友 |
| [02:11] | Oh,good. | 谢天谢地 |
| [02:12] | I mean,technically,he kind of is. | 我是说 理论上说 他又是 |
| [02:15] | Well,is he or isn’t he? | 那他到底是还不是? |
| [02:16] | Some of both,but definitely not either. | 两种都算 又都不算 |
| [02:20] | Are you getting any of this? | 你听明白了吗? |
| [02:22] | Look,I really like you. | 我真的喜欢你 |
| [02:25] | I just need you to be patient. | 我只想你能再等等 |
| [02:27] | I don’t want to lose you,Big Brown Eyes. | 我不想失去你 棕色电眼 |
| [02:33] | Yup. | 是啊 |
| [02:34] | Somebody doesn’t want to lose Big Brown Eyes. | 有人不想失去”棕色电眼” |
| [02:38] | ROBIN: Oh,Ted. | 噢 Ted |
| [02:39] | She’s got you on the hook. | 她把你钓上钩了 |
| [02:41] | What? | 什么? |
| [02:42] | What?I’m not on the hook. | 啥? 我才没有上钩呢 |
| [02:43] | Oh,you are totally on the hook. | 你完完全全上钩了 |
| [02:45] | She’s stringing you along. | 她把你晾着 |
| [02:46] | She’s not committing to you,but she’s keeping you around just in case, | 又不给你任何承诺 她只拿你当备胎而已 |
| [02:50] | like an old can of chili in the pantry. | 就像没菜下饭才会想到的陈年腐乳 |
| [02:53] | Um,who’s buying canned chili and not eating it immediately? | 买了陈年腐乳的人真会马上吃掉哦? |
| [02:56] | Amen,sister. | 阿门 主啊 |
| [02:59] | Ted,don’t feel bad. | Ted 别感到难过 |
| [03:00] | We’ve all been there. | 我们都经历过 |
| [03:00] | I’ve been on both sides of it. | 我两种经历都有 |
| [03:02] | I’ve been a hookey and a hooker. | 我引人上过钩 也上过别人的钩 |
| [03:04] | Move past it,guys. | 别八卦我了 大家 |
| [03:05] | I’ve been a little bit loose,but money never changed hands. | 我虽有掉以轻心的时候 但主导权总在我手里 |
| [03:09] | I’ve been on the hook. | 我也上过人家的钩 |
| [03:11] | Lisa Walker. | Lisa Walker |
| [03:12] | Picture it: 1994,St.Cloud,Minnesota. | 我们回到 1994年 明尼苏达州 圣克劳德镇 |
| [03:17] | So I was,like,thinking,Lisa- | 我是想 Lisa |
| [03:21] | do you maybe want to,like,go out with me? | 你想 跟我…一起约会吗? |
| [03:26] | That sounds great. | 听起来不错 |
| [03:28] | But I’m sort of seeing this guy. | 但是我现在正和一个男孩约会 |
| [03:30] | He’s got a LeBaron convertible and an “in” at the roller rink, | 他有克莱斯勒男爵敞篷车 和溜冰场的入场券 |
| [03:32] | so I’d hate to burn that bridge. | 所以我不想和他断绝关系 |
| [03:36] | I understand. | 我明白 |
| [03:39] | But how about this? | 这样吧 |
| [03:40] | You can be my secret boyfriend who does all my homework for me. | 你可以做帮我做作业的秘密男友 |
| [03:46] | A’ight. | 好啊 |
| [03:49] | You want to see my rap poster? | 想来看看我的饶舌歌手海报吗? |
| [03:51] | Poster whore. | 你这海报荡妇 |
| [03:54] | MARSHALL: Anyway… | 不管怎样 |
| [03:54] | Lisa Walker strung me along for months until one night, | Lisa Walker把我吊了几个月后 直到一天晚上 |
| [03:59] | I went to go tell her how much I loved her. | 我去告诉她我有多爱她 |
| [04:03] | In song. | 用唱歌的方式 |
| [04:06] | MARSHALL: She wasn’t home yet, so I waited. | 她还没回家 所以我一直等着 |
| [04:10] | And waited. | 等着… |
| [04:14] | I woke up four hours later,covered in snow. | 四小时后我醒了 身上都是积雪 |
| [04:18] | And that’s when I saw it. | 那时我看到了 |
| [04:21] | Lisa’s footsteps. | Lisa的脚印 |
| [04:23] | She had walked right over me and into the house. | 她就那样从我身边走进屋里 |
| [04:27] | It was the best thing that could have happened. | 那是世界上最好的事情 |
| [04:29] | It got me off her hook. | 从此我就摆脱了她的钩子 |
| [04:31] | Okay,that is definitely not what’s going on with me and Tiffany. | 好吧 这跟我和Tiffany的情况完全不一样 |
| [04:34] | Listen to this. | 听着 |
| [04:35] | I’m really into you. | 我真的很喜欢你 |
| [04:38] | I just can’t be with you right now. | 只是目前我不能和你在一起 |
| [04:44] | – Ted,”right no” is the classic on-the-hook catchphrase. – MARSHALL: Yup. | – Ted “目前” 是典型的上钩标语 – 没错 |
| [04:49] | “Right now” paints a picture of some sort of magical future time when everything will work out, | “目前”描绘了一个一切皆有可能的未来 |
| [04:52] | but the truth is,that will never happen. | 事实是 那是绝不可能实现的 |
| [04:56] | BARNEY: It’s like this. | 就像这样 |
| [04:57] | “I can’t be with you. | “我不能和你在一起” |
| [04:58] | ” Boom! | 轰! |
| [04:59] | “Right now. | “目前来说” |
| [05:04] | ” LILY: Yeah. | 是的 |
| [05:05] | I think my high school boyfriend,Scooter,is still sort of on the hook for me. | 我的高中男友 Scooter 现在好像还在我的钩上 |
| [05:08] | Sort of? | 好像? |
| [05:09] | He totally is. | 他就是的 |
| [05:10] | The poor guy showed up at our wedding hoping to win you back. | 那可怜虫还出现在我们的婚礼上 期待你回心转意 |
| [05:13] | LILY: Yeah. | 是的 |
| [05:14] | It’s still sometimes weird when I see him at work. | 有时在他工作的地方见到他 感觉还是怪怪的 |
| [05:17] | Wait.What? | 什么? |
| [05:19] | Scooter works in the school cafeteria. | Scooter在学校自助餐厅里工作 |
| [05:21] | We’ve talked about this. | 我们已经谈过了 |
| [05:22] | Hey,Lily.Nice dress. | Lily 裙子很漂亮 |
| [05:24] | Tater-tots? | 要来点小土豆儿吗? ( 我爱你 ) |
| [05:29] | We most certainly have not talked about this! | 我们绝对没有谈过这些! |
| [05:32] | Yes,we have. | 我们有啊 |
| [05:33] | I’ve mentioned it tons of times. | 我提到很多次了 |
| [05:35] | “Lunch Lady Scooter. | “厨娘Scooter” |
| [05:37] | ” I thought that you were referring to some sort of long overdue device | 我以为你是指某种早就过时的 (scooter也有摩托车的意思) |
| [05:40] | that carries around those poor,underappreciated lunch ladies! | 载着那些可怜的怀才不遇的厨娘的装置 |
| [05:44] | This explains a lot. | 这就难怪了 |
| [05:47] | Lunch Lady Scooter was there again today. | 厨娘Scooter今天又来了 |
| [05:49] | Oh,yeah? | 是吗? |
| [05:50] | Did you jump on that thing? | 你有没有跳上去 |
| [05:51] | Give it a ride? | 骑到它上面? |
| [05:53] | No! | 没有! |
| [05:54] | Really? | 真的? |
| [05:55] | If it were me,I’d be riding that scooter all day long until I broke that thang in half. | 如果是我的话 我会一天到晚骑着它 直到它断成两半(笑死) |
| [06:00] | So those poor women still have to walk everywhere? | 那些可怜的女人还是要徒步到处跑吗 |
| [06:04] | Wait.Scooter is working at your school?! | 等一下 Scooter在你们学校工作? |
| [06:07] | Are you jealous? | 你吃醋了? |
| [06:08] | No,I just feel bad for Scooter. | 不 我为Scooter叫屈 |
| [06:11] | ‘Cause the only reason he took that job is he thinks he has a shot with you. | 因为他会在那里工作 唯一的原因是他认为和你还有希望 |
| [06:13] | You have to make it clear that he doesn’t, | 你必须跟他说明白 他没有机会了 |
| [06:15] | so that he can move on and a real lunch lady can get her job back.Damn! | 这样他才能向前看 才能把工作还给一个真正的厨娘 靠 |
| [06:20] | I’ve tried. | 我试过了 |
| [06:22] | Hey,Lily. Lily | |
| [06:23] | I saw you had seventh period free. | 我知道你第七节课休息 |
| [06:25] | So do I. | 我也是 |
| [06:26] | You want to run away together? | 跟我一起私奔吧? |
| [06:29] | Let me be clear,Scooter. | 我必须跟你说清楚 Scooter |
| [06:31] | There is no way you and I can ever be together. | 我们俩是不可能在一起的 |
| [06:43] | Right now. | 目前来说 |
| [06:45] | I’ll see you tomorrow,Lily. | 明天见 Lily |
| [06:46] | It’s Tijuana Tuesday. | 明天是”提华纳的周二” |
| [06:49] | “Right now”? | “目前来说”? |
| [06:52] | You right-now’d Scooter? | 你对Scooter说”目前来说”? |
| [06:54] | You need to let Scooter off the hook once and for all. | 你必须要让Scooter永久脱离钩子 |
| [06:56] | LILY: You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [06:57] | Day after tomorrow,that’s exactly what I’m going to do. | 我打算后天就跟他摊牌 |
| [07:00] | Why not tomorrow? | 为什么明天不说? |
| [07:01] | Baby,I can’t ruin Tijuana Tuesday. | 亲爱的 我不能毁了提华纳的周二 |
| [07:06] | Really? | 真的吗? |
| [07:07] | You’re really going to sit here all night watching the door | 你打算整晚呆坐着看着门 |
| [07:10] | because Tiffany said she’ll “try to stop by”? | 就因为Tiffany说她会”尽量赶过来”? |
| [07:13] | Barney,I’m not going to just give up on her. | Barney 我不会就这么放弃她的 |
| [07:15] | NARRATOR: I should have given up on her. | 我真应该放弃她的 |
| [07:18] | This girl is special. | 这个女孩很特别 |
| [07:20] | She was the devil. | 她是恶魔 |
| [07:22] | Things are going to work out with Tiffany. | 和Tiffany会有结果的 |
| [07:24] | No,they’re not,dumbass. | 不 不会有结果的 蠢蛋 |
| [07:27] | Ted,let me be clear: this girl is a poison and you need to cut her out of your life forever. | Ted 我就说白了 这个女人是瓶毒药 你要永远的将她从生活中抹去 |
| [07:35] | Hey,there she is. | 她来了 |
| [07:39] | Oh,she brought some of her coworkers. | 还带了些同事过来 |
| [07:46] | Hang on to this girl,Ted. | 紧紧抓牢这个女孩 Ted |
| [07:48] | Hang on to her and never let go! | 紧紧抓住她 永不放手! |
| [07:56] | these are some of the hottest girls I’ve ever seen. | Ted 她们是我见过最漂亮的女人 |
| [07:58] | And they all work with Tiffany? | 她们都和Tiffany共事? |
| [08:00] | Yup. | 是的 |
| [08:01] | There could only be one explanation for this. | 只有一个原因可以解释了 |
| [08:04] | Ted… | Ted |
| [08:06] | is Tiffany a ph-ph-ph… | Tiffany是不是医 医 医… |
| [08:08] | pharmaceutical sales rep? | 医药销售代表? |
| [08:10] | Yeah,how did you know that? | 是的 你怎么知道的? |
| [08:11] | And you never thought to mention that? | 你怎么都不说下? |
| [08:15] | What?It’s just a job. | 为什么? 这只是份工作 |
| [08:17] | Just a j… | 只是份… |
| [08:19] | just a jah… | 只是份工… |
| [08:21] | Ted,throughout time there has always been one cutting-edge profession to which hot girls, | Ted 一直以来 只有一种顶级职业 聚集了所有辣妹 |
| [08:27] | like Tiffany,have flocked. | 就像Tiffany那样的 还成群结队的 |
| [08:29] | Shall I walk you through the history? | 要我给你讲一讲历史吗? |
| [08:30] | – I’m gonna explicitly say no. – It all started 2.5 million years ago. | – 我明确地表示拒绝 – 250万年前 |
| [08:35] | BARNEY: Man was a hunter. | 男人是猎人 |
| [08:37] | So,the hottest profession of the day? | 史上最辣的职业? |
| [08:40] | Gatherer. | 采摘者 |
| [08:41] | Homo erectus indeed. | 的确是猿人(直立–Barney指胸) |
| [08:46] | As man mastered technology, the hottest profession of the day evolved. | 男人进入技术时代 史上最辣的职业莫过于 |
| [08:51] | I’m pretty sure it’s a hernia. | 我很确定是疝气 |
| [08:52] | Can you check again? | 能再查一次吗? |
| [08:58] | And then,man took to the skies. | 然后 男人飞上了天空 |
| [09:00] | And so,hot women put on high heels and became stewardesses. | 所以 辣妹穿上了高跟鞋成为了空姐 |
| [09:06] | I am in the upright and locked position. | 我已经调节到”垂直锁定”的位置了 |
| [09:12] | And then man said,”Life is hard. | 然后男人说 “人生苦短 |
| [09:15] | I should start taking lotsf prescription drugs. | 我应该开始服用大量处方药” |
| [09:18] | ” And so,hot girls rolled into doctors’ offices, | 所以 辣妹们蜂拥到医生办公室 |
| [09:20] | looking sexy enough to render the very erection pills they peddled ironically redundant. | 打扮得相当性感 来兜售她们的 勃起小药丸 |
| [09:25] | So now,pharma girls are today’s hottest profession. | 所以如今 药业就是当今的最辣职业 |
| [09:30] | Hey,Big Brown Eyes. | 嗨 棕色电眼 |
| [09:31] | How you doing? | 你好吗? |
| [09:33] | I’m good. | 我很好 |
| [09:35] | Hey,by the way,you,uh,you ditch that loser boyfriend yet? | 顺便问下 你 你甩了那个废物男友了吗? |
| [09:38] | No,sir. | 没有 先生 |
| [09:43] | Touched my nose. | 碰了我的鼻子 |
| [09:45] | Dude,ditch Tiffany and join the Barnacle in a pharma girl free-for-all. | 甩了Tiffany 加入Barnacle药业 女孩全场免费 |
| [09:50] | Side effects may include loss of clothing,rug burn, | 副作用可能包括衣服丢失 地毯损伤 |
| [09:52] | shortness of breath and sore abdominals the next morning. | 呼吸急促 第二天早上腹部疼痛 |
| [09:55] | What in the world is up?! | 这世界到底怎么了?! |
| [10:01] | So… | 所以… |
| [10:02] | I know that you’ve been having trouble letting Scooter off the hook. | 我知道让Scooter下钩不容易 |
| [10:06] | Well,I decided what you need is practice. | 好 我决定你需要的就是练习 |
| [10:07] | Now,you say the problem is his cute,sad eyes? | 你说问题在于 他那可爱的 楚楚可怜的双眼 |
| [10:11] | Well… | 噢… |
| [10:19] | All right,shut it,woman. | 闭嘴 女人 |
| [10:21] | Now,I want you to look at this teacup pig | 现在 我要你看着这只迷你猪 |
| [10:24] | and tell him that there’s no way that you could ever be with him. | 告诉他你们之间绝对没有可能 |
| [10:31] | Teacup Pig,there is no way I can ever be with you. | 小猪猪 我们之间没有可能 |
| [10:46] | Right now. | 目前来说 |
| [10:47] | come on!Grow a pair! | 够了! 成熟点! |
| [10:48] | I’m sorry,but he’s just so freakin’ cute. | 对不起 但他真的太可爱了 |
| [10:53] | I just want to cuddle him all day long. | 让我抱他一整天都行 |
| [10:55] | Yes,I do. | 没错 我愿意 |
| [10:56] | You know that’s funny.I remember when you used to say things like that about me. | 有趣 让我想起你以前也这么对我说过 |
| [11:00] | Oh,I still do. | 现在我仍然愿意啊 |
| [11:01] | Yeah,not as much,Lily. | 今不如昔了 Lily |
| [11:04] | Not as much. | 今不如昔 |
| [11:08] | Ain’t no party like a pharma girl party ‘Cause a pharma girl party don’t stop! | 医药销售女代表的派对是最棒的 因为它不会停止! |
| [11:12] | Dude,I have already hooked up with three of them. | 哥们 我已经搞定三个了 |
| [11:15] | Fantasmo. | 棒极了 |
| [11:16] | Plus,my cholesterol is down. | 还有 我的胆固醇降低了 |
| [11:18] | My restless legs syndrome is cured. | 腿部不宁症治好了 |
| [11:19] | I’ve never felt more alive- oh. | 我从来没感到生命如此鲜活 |
| [11:22] | Guys,great news. | 好消息 |
| [11:24] | Tiffany broke up with her boyfriend. | Tiffany终于和她男友分手 |
| [11:26] | Proof that I am not on the hook. | 就此证明了 我没上钩 |
| [11:27] | Oh,you’re still on the hook. | 你还是上钩了 |
| [11:29] | Ah,uh-uh,listen to how we spent last night. | 先听听昨晚我们怎么过 |
| [11:32] | First,we cuddled. | 首先 我们拥抱 |
| [11:36] | Then,we shared chocolate cake. | 然后 我们一起吃巧克力蛋糕 |
| [11:40] | Then,well,I don’t usually join in on locker room talk, | 之后 虽然我不常参加更衣室谈话 (炫耀性事的场所) |
| [11:44] | but I gave her a pretty sensual foot rub. | 但我给她妙不可言的揉脚 |
| [11:49] | And let me guess: it didn’t go any further than that. | 我猜猜 事情就到此为止了 |
| [11:54] | Well,no,but… | 嗯 不尽然 不过… |
| [11:55] | And tell me,did you by any chance make that chocolate cake? | 告诉我 那巧克力蛋糕是你做的吗? |
| [12:01] | – It was a mix. – Dude. | 我有负责搅拌 |
| [12:03] | There’s no shame in admitting it,Ted. | 没有必要羞于承认 Ted |
| [12:05] | We’ve all been on people’s hooks and we’ve all kept someone on the hook. | 我们都曾上过钩 也让别人上我们的钩 |
| [12:09] | Um,I most certainly have not. | 我就没有过 |
| [12:11] | What?!Are you joking? | 什么?! 开什么玩笑? |
| [12:14] | What about that girl from the university library? | 还记得那个大学图书馆的女生吗? |
| [12:17] | Um, Henrietta? Henrietta? | |
| [12:18] | Henrietta and I are just friends. | Henrietta和我只是朋友 |
| [12:20] | Oh, she is so on your hook. | 她上你钩上大发了 |
| [12:22] | Absolutely not. | 当然不是 |
| [12:24] | NARRATOR:She totally was. | 她确实上我的钩了 |
| [12:26] | I mean… | 我是说… |
| [12:28] | we cuddled. | 我们相拥 |
| [12:31] | We shared chocolate cake. | 分享巧克力蛋糕 |
| [12:35] | She gave me foot rubs- long ones. | 给我做脚部按摩 -时间颇长 |
| [12:39] | I’m not proud,kids. | 孩子们 我很惭愧 |
| [12:41] | You like having Henrietta around for the same reason that Tiffany likes having you around: | 你和Henrietta的相处方式 正如Tiffany那样 |
| [12:45] | it’s a nice little ego boost. | 不过是些自我膨胀的产物而已 |
| [12:47] | No wonder you’re such an expert about keeping people on the hook. | 怪不得你在这方面是个专家 |
| [12:50] | What about that poor camera guy you work with? | 还记得那个被你愚弄的摄像师? |
| [12:53] | Mike and I are just friends. | Mike和我只是朋友 |
| [12:54] | Come on. | 吹吧你 |
| [12:57] | Oh,yeah,that’s the stuff. | 就是那里 |
| [13:00] | Robin,have you ever thought about taking us to the next level? | Robin 你有想过让我们之间更进一步吗? |
| [13:04] | Well,if you’re talking about doing my laundry,I’m on board. | 如果你说的是帮我洗衣服 没问题 |
| [13:07] | You got yourself a deal. | 是你说的啊 |
| [13:10] | What?! | 什么?! |
| [13:11] | I- I am not keeping Mike on the hook. | 我才没有让Mike上钩呢 |
| [13:13] | You are Captain Hook. | 你简直是铁钩船长 |
| [13:15] | Dude,I’m a girl. | 我是个女孩 |
| [13:16] | Okayour girl parts are like a spiderweb. | 女孩子就像蜘蛛网 |
| [13:19] | Sometimes you’re gonna catch stuff you don’t want. | 总会有些你不喜欢的东西撞上来 |
| [13:22] | That doesn’t make it okay. | 这不成理由 |
| [13:24] | Oh,a-and Henrietta is in,in no way wasting her time with you,right? | 那Henrietta还不是 在你身上浪费她的青春? |
| [13:27] | Henrietta knows that we’re just friends. | Henrietta清楚我们是朋友 |
| [13:29] | In fact,I’m gonna call her up and hang out with her tonight as friends. | 这样吧 我现在就打给她 像朋友一样度过今晚 |
| [13:35] | Hey,Ted. | 嘿 Ted |
| [13:36] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [13:37] | What? | 什么? |
| [13:38] | Uh,do you want a foot massage? | 要我给你揉脚吗? |
| [13:38] | ‘Cause I’ve been practicing on myself. | 我有在自己身上练习过哦 |
| [13:41] | No,I’m good. | 不了 |
| [13:43] | I didn’t know if you were hungry,so I just threw together some… | 不知道你饿不饿 所以擅自准备了些… |
| [13:46] | it’s not a big deal. | 粗茶淡饭啦 |
| [13:47] | Kids,looking back,I don’t know how I didn’t see that Henrietta was madly in love with me. | 孩子们 回想当初我不知为何 我对Henrietta爱我的事实毫无知觉 |
| [13:55] | Hello. | 喂 |
| [13:56] | Hey,Ted. | 嘿 Ted |
| [13:57] | Hey,Tiffany. | 嘿 Tiffany |
| [13:58] | I’m going out of town this weekend for my friend’s wedding. | 这周末我要参加朋友的婚礼 |
| [14:01] | Want to be my date? | 要当我的伴吗? |
| [14:03] | I would love to. | 非常愿意 |
| [14:04] | Hey,what are you doing right now? | 现在在干嘛呢? |
| [14:05] | Oh,God,no. | 不是吧 |
| [14:07] | Awesome. | 好极了 |
| [14:08] | Okay,I’ll see you in,like,ten minutes? | 十分钟后见好吗? |
| [14:10] | Great. | 好极了 |
| [14:11] | Soy,Henrietta,something came up. | 不好意思 Henrietta 有点事 |
| [14:14] | Take a rain check,pal? | 延期再续好吗? 哥们 |
| [14:15] | Yeah,it’s no problem. | 没问题 |
| [14:17] | All right,yeah,hey-ho. | 哼哼哈嘿 |
| [14:18] | Oh,you’re strong. | 你真壮~ |
| [14:19] | What a jerk. | 我是个混蛋 |
| [14:22] | Henrietta,I… | Henrietta 我… |
| [14:24] | Wait.Where did Ted go? | 等等 Ted呢? |
| [14:26] | I thought we were finally going to get to meet him. | 不是说要见家长了吗? |
| [14:27] | Yeah,something came up,okay,Mom? | 他有点事 就这样了 妈 |
| [14:30] | I told you there was no Ted. | 早告诉你没有什么Ted |
| [14:33] | I heard that. | 我能听到 |
| [14:39] | So there I was,at one of the surest signs of taking a relationship to the next level: | 就这样 带着对 关系更进一步的征兆的憧憬 |
| [14:43] | an out-of-town wedding. | 婚礼伴侣 |
| [14:45] | It was finally happening. | 终于到了那一天 |
| [14:47] | Champagne? | 香槟? |
| [14:48] | Ted,oh,my gosh,I forgot to call you. | Ted 天呐 我忘了打给你 |
| [14:51] | Well,whatever it is you wanted to talk about,we can talk about it now. | 你可以现在跟我说 |
| [14:55] | This is Jack. | 这是Jack |
| [14:56] | He’s the best man at the wedding. | 他是婚礼的伴郎 |
| [14:58] | We just got back together. | 我们刚复合 |
| [15:01] | You know,now that I think about it,a phone call would have been nice. | 现在想想 这事电话上跟我说比较好 |
| [15:04] | You’re Ted? | 你就是Ted? |
| [15:06] | Ouch. | 哎呀 |
| [15:07] | But I hear you make a mean chocolate cake. | 不过听说你做巧克力蛋糕不咋地 |
| [15:12] | Oh,isn’t he great? | 他很棒是吧? |
| [15:14] | And he’s in a band. | 而且他组了个乐队哦 |
| [15:17] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [15:19] | Come on,Lily. | 快 Lily |
| [15:20] | You have to get Scooter off the hook. | 别再愚弄Scooter了 |
| [15:21] | Now,try again. | 再试试 |
| [15:23] | Teacup Pig,oh… | 迷你猪… |
| [15:26] | I don’t want to be with you. | 我不想跟你在一起 |
| [15:36] | Right now. | 目前来说 |
| [15:37] | Man up! | 再来! |
| [15:40] | Teacup Pig… | 迷你猪… |
| [15:44] | I don’t want to be with you. | 我不想跟你在一起 |
| [15:51] | Ever. | 永远都不 |
| [15:52] | Finish him! | 说完它! |
| [15:53] | We will never be together in any sort of sexual way ever again. | 我们之间不会再有任何情爱关系 |
| [15:58] | Nice. | 好 |
| [16:00] | Sort of a weird thing to say to a pig. | 就是跟头猪这么说有点怪 |
| [16:02] | It felt really wrong. | 怪死了 |
| [16:04] | Anyway,I just don’t think you and I are going to work. | 总而言之 我不觉得我们之间有可能 |
| [16:09] | Right now. | 目前来说 |
| [16:10] | NARRATOR:And that’s when it hit me. | 就这样我清醒过来 |
| [16:12] | I was on the hook. | 我确实上了钩 |
| [16:13] | I also realized… | 同时我意识到… |
| [16:15] | I missed this so much, baby. | 亲爱的 这太让我怀念了 |
| [16:17] | …Tiffany was on this guy’s hook. | …Tiffany上了这家伙的钩 |
| [16:19] | It was a vicious cycle. | 真是个恶性循环 |
| [16:21] | Henrietta was on my hook. | Henrietta上了我钩 |
| [16:22] | And years later, I found out this poor bastard was on Henrietta’s hook. | 多年之后 我发现 这混蛋上了Henrietta的钩 |
| [16:29] | You know what? | 知道吗? |
| [16:31] | We’re not going to work ever. | 我们之间永远没可能 |
| [16:34] | I’m done. I’m done. | 我受够了 |
| [16:39] | And it’s really better for the circulation | 试试用拇指揉揉足弓 |
| [16:40] | if you knead the arches with your thumbs. | 对血液循环有好处 |
| [16:43] | Now, I’m done. | 我说完了 |
| [16:47] | Marshall, I can do this by myself. | Marshall 我自己一个可以了 |
| [16:50] | Okay, well, then prove it. | 那就证明给我看 |
| [16:52] | And, um… | 还有… |
| [16:54] | Grab me a pudding. | 帮我带个布丁 |
| [16:58] | Listen up, Scooter. | 听着 Scooter |
| [17:00] | There is no way you and I will ever be together. | 我们之间绝对没可能 |
| [17:11] | Right now!Marshall! | 目前来说! Marshall! |
| [17:13] | I’m sorry, but he’s adorable. | 对不起 可是他太可爱了 |
| [17:15] | Listen. | 听着 |
| [17:16] | I don’t want to be with you. | 我不想跟你在一起 |
| [17:18] | Right now.Hang in there, Scoots! | 目前来说 坚持住! Scoots! |
| [17:20] | I’m not going to live forever. | 我们不会永远在一起的 |
| [17:23] | Last night I was with this pharma girl who was so hot, | 昨晚那个药品代理女郎实在是太辣了 |
| [17:25] | you should call a doctor if you don’t have an erection for more than four hours. | 要是你不连续勃起四小时就该打给医院了 |
| [17:29] | Am I right, people? | 是吧 兄弟? |
| [17:31] | Yeah, there’s no people- | 没有什么兄弟- |
| [17:32] | just the girl you most recently dated. | 只有个最近跟你刚分手的女人 |
| [17:36] | Hey,Barney. | 嘿 Barney |
| [17:38] | I want you to meet the newest pharma girl. | 给你介绍我们药品代理的新人 |
| [17:41] | Gladys Reynolds. | Gladys Reynolds |
| [17:42] | Nice to make your acquaintance. | 很高兴认识你 |
| [17:43] | I represent statins and other cholesterol-lowering drugs. | 我代理的是抑制素和降胆固醇药 |
| [17:47] | Come on,girl.Let’s go get our drink on. | 来吧 咱们去喝个够 |
| [17:52] | It’s over. | 结束了 |
| [17:53] | What’s over? | 什么结束了? |
| [17:55] | Pharma girls are no longer exclusively hot chicks. | 药品代理不再是辣妹的代名词 |
| [17:59] | It’s the en. | 这是时代的终结 |
| [18:00] | You’re being a little dramatic. | 你有点小题大做了 |
| [18:02] | Am I? | 我? |
| [18:04] | It starts out with a Gladys. | 这会从那个Gladys开始 |
| [18:06] | Next thing you know,a few not-so-fabulous gay guys enter the ranks. | 然后 一些不咋地的基情男会进入这行业 |
| [18:09] | And before you know it, | 你还没意识过来 |
| [18:11] | pharma girls look like the crew on a Southwest flight from Albuquerque to Little Rock. | 药品代理女郎就会像阿尔伯克基 到小石城的西南航空机组人员一样 |
| [18:17] | It’s over! | 结束了! |
| [18:20] | So that night,I went straight to Henrietta’s- all set to let her off the hook. | 那晚 我去到Henrietta家 准备好让她清醒过来 |
| [18:33] | This is Jack. | 这是Jack |
| [18:35] | He’s the best man at the wedding. | 他是婚礼的伴郎 |
| [18:41] | I’m done. | 我受够了 |
| [18:47] | Yes! | 我愿意! |
| [18:48] | The answer is yes! | 答案是 我愿意! |
| [18:52] | No. | 不是吧 |
| [18:54] | it gets worse. | 祸不单行 |
| [18:56] | It’s perfect! | 太合适了! |
| [18:57] | Mom,Dad! | 妈妈爸爸! |
| [18:58] | Ted proposed! | Ted向我求婚了! |
| [19:00] | Oh,my God! | 我的天! |
| [19:01] | I knew this day would come! | 我就知道会有这么一天! |
| [19:03] | Son! | 儿子! |
| [19:04] | Yeah,well,there’s been a… | 这个 那个 是个误… |
| [19:06] | No. | 不是吧 |
| [19:07] | What did you do? | 你怎么办? |
| [19:10] | I seriously considered just marrying her out of sheer awkwardness. | 相对于尴尬 我有考虑过就这么婚了 |
| [19:15] | But I did what I had to do. | 不过我做了正确的事 |
| [19:16] | I did what anyone keeping someone on the hook should do. | 任何有备胎的人都会做的事 |
| [19:20] | I broke her heart. | 我伤了她的心 |
| [19:22] | Henrietta,I’m sorry if this is blunt,but I think I owe you this. | Henrietta 或许这样太直接 不过我想该跟你说 |
| [19:27] | I don’t want to be with you. | 我不想跟你在一起 |
| [19:30] | Right now? | 目前来说? |
| [19:33] | Ever. | 永远 |
| [19:36] | But we’re still getting married,right? | 不过我们还是会结婚 对吧? |
| [19:39] | It was brutal. | 真是太残忍了 |
| [19:41] | Oh,I’m sorry,buddy. | 真遗憾 伙计 |
| [19:44] | Honesty is tough,but in the end,it is the far kinder alternative. | 真话确实会伤人 不过终究是个好的选择 |
| [19:48] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [19:50] | Hey,sweetie. | 嘿 宝贝 |
| [19:54] | Hey,Mike. | 嘿 Mike |
| [19:55] | I have to tell you something. | 有些事要跟你说 |
| [19:58] | Wait.Did you finish my delicates? | 等等 我的内衣你洗了没? |
| [20:00] | Got one more load. | 等下再洗 |
| [20:01] | it can wait. | 慢慢来没问题 |
| [20:06] | I… | 我… |
| [20:13] | Hey,how’s it going? | 怎么样啦? |
| [20:15] | Still in mourning over the end of the pharma girl era? | 还在为药品代理女郎时代终结而伤心吗? |
| [20:17] | No. | 不 |
| [20:18] | I realized that their reign had to end to make room for some new hot girl profession. | 我明白 她们需要让出霸主地位 给其他火辣的职业女性 |
| [20:23] | Maybe it’ll be intergalactic communications officer on a rocket ship | 可能会是在无法想象的远方星系里的 |
| [20:28] | to some distant solar system we can’t possibly imagine. | 宇宙船星际通信员 |
| [20:32] | Maybe it’ll be… | 可能是… |
| [20:33] | meter maids.We just don’t know. | 女交警 没人知道 |
| [20:36] | But one thing is sure. | 不过有件事是肯定的 |
| [20:39] | The future glows like a giant sun shooting amber rays of light into our hearts and minds. | 未来正如太阳射出琥珀色的光线 照在我心田 |
| [20:49] | Wow,uh,what changed your mind? | 是什么改变了你的心态? |
| [20:52] | The realization that hope springs eternal,Robin. | 人类总是向往美好事物的 Robin |
| [20:56] | That and this little bottle of purple pills I found in my couch cushion. | 同时还有藏在我沙发下的一瓶紫色小药丸 |
| [21:01] | Don’t know what they are,but they are amazing! | 不知道什么成分 不过感觉好极了 |