| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Hey, what do you guys think of my new ducky tie? | 你们觉得我新买的小鸭领带如何 |
| [00:03] | Pretty cute, right? | 挺可爱的 对吧 |
| [00:05] | And not that much more expensive than a regular tie. | 而且比普通领带也贵不了多少 |
| [00:08] | A ducky tie? | 小鸭领带 |
| [00:10] | Bro, why do you do this | 兄弟 你这是何苦呢 |
| [00:11] | when you know I must slam you for it? | 非得逼着我当众羞辱你一番吗 |
| [00:15] | You guys might want to look away | 你们大伙儿最好转移视线 |
| [00:16] | ’cause this ain’t gonna be pretty. | 因为场面会变得十分难看 |
| [00:18] | You ready? | 准备好了吗 |
| [00:20] | Duck, duck… gross. | 小鸭图案恶恶恶 |
| [00:23] | Hashtag burn, | 马修品味臭臭臭 |
| [00:24] | hashtag duck tie slam, | 小鸭领带差差差 |
| [00:26] | hashtag Stinson rocks. | 活该被我巴尼耍 |
| [00:28] | What else is going on? | 还有什么新闻 |
| [00:29] | Oh, guess who I ran into. | 猜猜我遇到了谁 |
| [00:32] | A girl from my past. | 我的一个前女友 |
| [00:34] | Any guesses? | 大家快猜 |
| [00:35] | – Stella. – Zoe. | -斯黛拉 -苏伊 |
| [00:36] | – Karen? – The girl who beat you up. | -凯伦 -海扁你的女孩 |
| [00:38] | The girl who ruined a photo with Slash! | 毁掉你和斯莱施合照的女孩 |
| [00:39] | The girl who made you get the butterfly tattoo? | 害你纹了蝴蝶纹身的女孩 |
| [00:41] | You make it sound like | 被你们这么一说 |
| [00:41] | I’ve dated a series of Stieg Larrson novels. | 我觉得跟我约会的不是人 而是斯蒂格·拉森的三部曲 |
| [00:44] | Perhaps I need to be a little more specific. | 也许我该说得再具体一点 |
| [00:47] | I met this girl at a wedding. | 我们在一场婚礼上相遇 |
| [00:48] | We were together for a while, | 相知 相许 相爱 |
| [00:50] | but then she moved to Germany. | 但后来她远赴德国追求梦想 |
| [00:52] | We decided to try long distance, but it didn’t work | 我们也曾试过远距离恋爱 但以失败告终 |
| [00:55] | because I cheated on her | 因为我当时背着她 |
| [00:56] | with someone at this very table. | 与现在就坐于此的某人偷情 |
| [01:00] | Victoria. | 维多利亚 |
| [01:01] | Victoria! | 维多利亚 |
| [01:02] | She catered dessert for the Architects’ Ball. | 她为建筑师舞会供应甜点 |
| [01:04] | Wow. I mean, what’s it been, like, what, six years? | 哇 我是说 已经时隔6年了吧 |
| [01:07] | Yeah, it’s so funny how the past… | 是啊 过去真是有趣 |
| [01:10] | you know, you think you’re doing fine, but you know, | 你以为你过得还好 可是 |
| [01:13] | because true love… God, Lily! | 因为真爱… 天啊 莉莉 |
| [01:15] | What on Earth is going on with your cans? | 你这对胸器是怎么回事 |
| [01:17] | Oh, these old things? | 你说这对旧瓶子吗 |
| [01:20] | I got my pregnancy boobs! | 我现在可是老瓶装新酒[孕期涨奶] |
| [01:22] | I’m in that sweet spot | 这是一个无比美妙的阶段 |
| [01:23] | where the chestal area knows I’m pregnant, | 胸部知道我怀孕了 于是波涛汹涌 |
| [01:25] | but hasn’t told the downstairs neighbors. | 但小腹还没收到风 仍旧杨柳细腰 |
| [01:28] | Well, what are you waiting for, Lil? | 你还在等什么 莉莉 |
| [01:29] | Bust ’em out! Make ’em dance! | 请那对活宝出来蹦达蹦达吧 |
| [01:31] | No! | 不要 |
| [01:32] | * Let your boobies show! * | * 出来 活蹦乱跳的宝贝 * |
| [01:35] | Okay, I’m sorry, pal, | 抱歉 哥们 |
| [01:37] | but the party in my wife’s sweater is a private event, | 但我老婆毛衣的里可是私人派对 |
| [01:40] | and I’m the bouncer. | 而我是保镖[Bouncer亦指巨大的东西] |
| [01:41] | Dude, I think they’s the bouncers. | 伙计 我想它们才是称职的大块头 |
| [01:43] | Okay, can we stop talking about my wife’s breasts, please? | 够了 我们能别再说我老婆的胸部了吗 |
| [01:47] | Ted ran into Victoria! | 泰德偶遇维多利亚 |
| [01:49] | I know, I’m still a little shaken by it. | 我知道 我现在还有点意外 |
| [01:51] | I mean, there she was after all these years. | 这么多年后 她又出现了 |
| [01:53] | The emotions and memories and… | 那些感情和回忆… |
| [01:56] | Geez, Lily, it’s like you have a butt on your chest. | 天啊 莉莉 感觉就像你屁股长胸上了 |
| [02:17] | Why on Earth would I want to see that? | 我干嘛要看那个 |
| [02:20] | They’re round and attached to my body. | 因为它们是圆的 也是我身体的一部分 |
| [02:22] | It’s an even trade. | 以屁股换胸部 以蛋蛋换咪咪 |
| [02:23] | Okay, who wants dinner? | 行了 谁想吃晚餐 |
| [02:25] | Bless you. Let’s go to Shinjitsu. | 上帝保佑你 我们去武士餐馆吧 |
| [02:27] | Aw, again? Really? | 又去 真的吗 |
| [02:29] | You bring that up, like, once a month. | 你好像每个月都要去一次 |
| [02:30] | It’s hibachi grilling with a vaudeville twist. | 边吃日式炭火烧烤 边看杂耍表演 |
| [02:32] | I mean, come on, who’s in? | 多棒的餐厅啊 谁要去 |
| [02:34] | No! Forget it! | 不要 我不去 |
| [02:36] | Okay, how about this: | 那这样如何 |
| [02:37] | if you can go ten seconds without looking at Lily’s boobs, | 如果你能坚持10秒 不盯着莉莉的胸部看 |
| [02:41] | we’ll go wherever you want to go. | 餐厅任你选 |
| [02:44] | Deal. | 成交 |
| [02:50] | Damn it! | 该死没忍住 |
| [02:52] | Oh, well. | 能继续也不错 |
| [02:54] | So you saw Victoria. | 你见到了维多利亚 |
| [02:57] | You must have been freaked. | 你一定吓坏了 |
| [02:58] | No, it was cool. | 没有 我挺淡定的 |
| [03:03] | Hey, Ted. | 嗨 泰德 |
| [03:05] | Hey, kiddo. | 嗨 小妞 |
| [03:07] | Okay, Ted, ’cause from where I was standing… | 行了 泰德 我当时看见的可是另外一番景象 |
| [03:24] | Robin! Just… okay? | 罗宾 留点面子 行不 |
| [03:27] | I’m telling this story. | 这故事我来讲 |
| [03:30] | Instead of the obligatory awkward small talk, | 那些礼貌性的尴尬问候就免了吧 |
| [03:32] | let me just kick this off by saying | 我的开场白就一句 |
| [03:36] | I’m really, really sorry. | 我真的非常抱歉 |
| [03:39] | Thanks. It’s unnecessary, but thanks. | 多谢 其实大可不必 还是谢谢 |
| [03:44] | So, wasn’t awkward. | 瞧 气氛自然不尴尬 |
| [03:46] | – It was a little awkward. – Not really. | -明明就有点尴尬 -才没有 |
| [03:47] | It was a little awkward. | 真的有点尴尬 |
| [03:49] | Lucky for you, the cavalry rode in to smooth things over. | 不过算你走运 有骑士出场为您排忧解难 |
| [03:54] | So, uh… I stole your boyfriend! | 其实 是我抢了你男朋友 |
| [03:59] | That was, like, crazy! | 当时 真是没大脑 |
| [04:02] | Like, what?! | 一念之差干傻事 |
| [04:03] | But… bridge, water under it. | 不过 都过去了 |
| [04:07] | It was all Ted’s fault. He got me drunk. | 都是泰德的错 是他把我灌醉 |
| [04:09] | What? Yeah! Be right there. | 谁叫我呢 好 马上过去 |
| [04:13] | Oh, guess who’s here? Robin. | 猜猜那是谁 罗宾 |
| [04:16] | Oh. I’m really happy for you guys. | 我真替你俩高兴 |
| [04:19] | You look cute together. | 你们很般配 |
| [04:20] | Oh, no, no, we’re not together. | 不不 我们不是一对 |
| [04:21] | I mean, we-we dated for, like, a year. | 我们俩谈了大概一年就分手了 |
| [04:23] | But now we’re just friends. | 现在只是朋友 |
| [04:26] | It’s not weird. | 这不奇怪吧 |
| [04:27] | No, no. Why would that be weird? | 不 这有什么奇怪的 |
| [04:29] | I mean, if you hung out every day, that would… | 要是你们每天都混在一起 那才 |
| [04:31] | We do. | 我们的确如此 |
| [04:32] | …still not be weird. | 正常嘛 |
| [04:34] | I’ve never known anybody | 我还从没见过有谁 |
| [04:35] | that hangs out with their ex every day. | 每天和前女友混在一起的 |
| [04:36] | Well, Barney does. | 巴尼也是 |
| [04:38] | Really? Who’s Barney’s ex-girlfriend? | 真的吗 巴尼的前女友是谁 |
| [04:39] | Robin. | 罗宾 |
| [04:41] | Your Robin? | 你的那位罗宾 |
| [04:42] | Mine and Barney’s. | 确切地说 是我和巴尼的 |
| [04:44] | You don’t all three hang out together? | 你们不会是三个人一起玩吧 |
| [04:46] | All the time. | 向来如此 |
| [04:47] | And we have weird. | 这下就奇怪了 |
| [04:50] | It’s not weird! | 这才不奇怪 |
| [04:51] | Has anyone gotten a bite yet? | 有谁用筷子吃上饭了 |
| [04:53] | Oh, good! Here we go! | 太棒了 要开始咯 |
| [04:55] | The main event. | 重头戏登场 |
| [04:57] | Oh, we got Takumi. He is good! | 我们的厨师是拓海 他可厉害了 |
| [04:59] | I mean, who am I kidding? | 我开什么玩笑呢 |
| [04:59] | They’re all amazing! | 他们全都超牛 |
| [05:01] | Let the dinnertainment begin! | 晚餐助兴正式开始 |
| [05:05] | Oh, that reminds me, | 我突然想起来 |
| [05:06] | there’s this other restaurant we should try sometime. | 改天我们该去尝尝另一家餐馆 |
| [05:08] | What they do is, | 他们的拿手活是 |
| [05:10] | they cook your meal in a little room | 在一间名叫”厨房”的小房间里 |
| [05:12] | called a “Kitchen.” | 专心为你烹饪食物 |
| [05:14] | What’s the name of that…? | 那家餐馆名字叫什么来着 |
| [05:15] | Oh, yeah! “Every Other Restaurant In New York City.” | 哦 对了 叫”纽约市其他任何一家餐馆” |
| [05:18] | Hashtag burn, | 马修品味臭臭臭 |
| [05:19] | hashtag Your Tie Is Still Dumb, | 小鸭领带傻傻傻 |
| [05:21] | hashtag refill! | 小妞续杯快快快 |
| [05:26] | So you’re talking to Victoria. | 你刚说你跟维多利亚聊了起来 |
| [05:27] | I’m talking to Victoria. | 对 我们聊了起来 |
| [05:29] | Well, I should probably get back to the bakery. | 我该回面包店了 |
| [05:32] | I’m taking a late bus out to the Hamptons tonight, | 我要坐末班车连夜赶回汉普顿斯 |
| [05:34] | and I’ve got a sink full of dishes | 我助手给我留了 |
| [05:35] | that my assistant did not clean. | 一水池要洗的碗碟 |
| [05:38] | Because my assistant is me. | 而那个天杀的助手就是我 |
| [05:40] | But it was really good seeing you, Ted. | 但还是很高兴见到你 泰德 |
| [05:43] | Yeah, you, too. | 我也是 |
| [05:46] | Wait. | 等一下 |
| [05:49] | – Let me do the dishes. – What? | -让我帮你洗吧 -什么 |
| [05:51] | Victoria, do you believe in fate? | 维多利亚 你相信命运吗 |
| [05:54] | I believe you’re about to give a big speech on fate. | 我相信你将要发表一通关于命运演说 |
| [05:56] | Well, I do. | 没错 |
| [05:57] | And I think when two people like you and me | 我觉得一定是命运的安排 |
| [06:00] | randomly bump into each other, it means something. | 才会让我们今晚在这里意外地重逢 |
| [06:03] | I have to make amends for what I did. | 我必须为我所犯的错作出补偿 |
| [06:05] | Look, I can’t undo what I did six years ago, but… | 我虽然不能让六年前的错误消失 |
| [06:09] | I can wash dishes. | 但我能洗碗 |
| [06:11] | It’s actually something I’m good at. | 其实洗碗是我的强项 |
| [06:14] | Ted… | 泰德 |
| [06:14] | I swear to you I am not trying anything. | 我发誓我没任何企图 |
| [06:18] | * I said, bang, bang, bangity-bang * | * 我们都是神枪手 * |
| [06:20] | * I said a bang, bang, bangity-bang. * | * 每一颗子弹消灭一个敌人 * |
| [06:22] | Guys, guys! Shut up! | 同志们 闭嘴 |
| [06:25] | Give the artist a little respect! | 尊敬一下这位艺术家吧 |
| [06:27] | Sir, I apologize for that, | 先生 我深感抱歉 无论是对刚才的所作所为 |
| [06:30] | and for what I’m about to say. | 还是接来我要说的话 |
| [06:31] | Here’s my impression of this guy. | 我对这位厨师的印象是这样 |
| [06:37] | Welcome to Shinjitsu! Uh! | 欢迎来到武士餐馆 |
| [06:40] | I used to be a night manager at Dairy Queen! Brr! | 我以前是DQ冰淇淋的夜班经理 |
| [06:44] | Anyone can do that. | 这种小把戏谁不会啊 |
| [06:45] | Oh really? Then why don’t you do it, Barney? | 是吗 那你怎么不露两手 巴尼 |
| [06:47] | Show us all the tricks if they’re so easy. | 要是这么简单 你也来耍两下嘛 |
| [06:49] | Show us the onion volcano, | 给我们做一个洋葱火山 |
| [06:51] | the fried rice beating heart, | 心跳炒饭 |
| [06:53] | the shrimp in the pocket. | 口袋虾仁 |
| [06:54] | I bet Ted showed Victoria the shrimp in his pocket. | 我打赌泰德一定给维多利亚看他裤裆里的”小虾”了 |
| [06:58] | Shrimp? Really? | 小虾 不至于吧 |
| [07:00] | Okay, I’ll do all those things. | 好 我来表演 |
| [07:02] | You just name the time and the place. | 你来定时间和地点 |
| [07:03] | Okay, right here after we eat. | 好 等我们吃完 就在这儿吧 |
| [07:05] | And what do I get if I do? | 那如果我做到了 有什么好处呢 |
| [07:06] | What do you want? | 你想要什么 |
| [07:07] | I want to touch Lily’s boobs. | 我想摸莉莉的咪咪 |
| [07:08] | Deal! | 成交 |
| [07:09] | Hey, sweetie? | 那个 亲爱的 |
| [07:10] | Yeah, I heard. | 恩 我听到了 |
| [07:13] | Okay, Barney, you want to make this real? | 好吧 巴尼 你想玩真的吗 |
| [07:16] | Let’s make this real. | 那我们就来真的 |
| [07:18] | Terms: If you can do all that stuff | 条款如下 如果马修列举的每一项 |
| [07:20] | that Marshall just listed off, | 你都能顺利完成 |
| [07:22] | I will let you touch one boob. | 我就让你摸其中一个咪咪 |
| [07:24] | Both boobs. | 两个都要 |
| [07:24] | Just one. | 就一个 |
| [07:25] | Touch and squeeze. | 摸一下 捏一把 |
| [07:26] | Just touch. | 只能摸 |
| [07:26] | Touch and motorboat. | 摸一下 揉一把 |
| [07:27] | Just touch. | 只能摸 |
| [07:28] | -Honka honka? -Barney. | -那光捏不摸呢 -巴尼 |
| [07:29] | – Just touch. – Just touch. | -那只摸 -只能摸 |
| [07:30] | – For one hour. – For one second. | -一个小时 -一秒钟 |
| [07:32] | 20 minutes, both boobs. | 20分钟 两个咪咪 |
| [07:33] | Thirty seconds, one boob. | 30秒 一个咪咪 |
| [07:35] | Four minutes, both boobs, three squeezes. | 4分钟 两个咪咪 捏三把 |
| [07:37] | – One minute, both boobs, one squeeze. – Deal! | -一分钟 两个咪咪 捏一把 -成交 |
| [07:41] | But… if you can’t do everything, | 但是 如果你没有如数完成 |
| [07:43] | and I mean everything, | 我是说每一项都要做到 |
| [07:45] | then you have to wear Marshall’s ducky tie… | 那你就得戴着马修的小鸭领带 |
| [07:49] | for one year. | 一整年 |
| [07:50] | Ooh… | 真狠 |
| [07:55] | Deal. | 成交 |
| [08:01] | So you get to the bakery. | 所以你们去了面包房 |
| [08:02] | We get to the bakery. | 我们去了面包房 |
| [08:04] | Well, this is great. | 不错不错 |
| [08:06] | You know what else is getting clean | 你知道除了这么蛋糕杯盘 |
| [08:07] | along with this cupcake tray? | 还有什么也一并被洗干净了吗 |
| [08:09] | My conscience. | 我的良心 |
| [08:11] | You got anything else you need to atone for? | 你还有什么过错需要弥补的吗 |
| [08:13] | My oven needs cleaning. | 因为我的炉子也需要清理 |
| [08:14] | Un, no, nothing else. | 没 没别的了 |
| [08:18] | Not yet anyway. | 暂时没有了 |
| [08:20] | * Bang, bang, bangity-bang, said a bang-bang-bangity. * | * 我们都是飞行军 哪怕那山高水又… * |
| [08:24] | I’m getting married. | 我要结婚了 |
| [08:29] | Bang. | 深 |
| [08:34] | Baby, I think I got yours. | 宝贝 我好像喝到你那瓶了 |
| [08:36] | This one has no booze. | 这瓶没有酒味 |
| [08:37] | Oh, no, that’s mine. | 错 那是我的 |
| [08:38] | Yeah, I don’t know | 我实在不懂 |
| [08:39] | why people think that Mai Tais need booze. | 为什么人们都认为鸡尾酒里面必须得有酒 |
| [08:41] | I’ve been drinking virgins all night, | 我整晚都喝的都是不含酒精的 |
| [08:42] | and they’re delicious. | 超级好喝哦 |
| [08:44] | Yeah, well, enjoy your Mai Tai | 好好享用你的鸡尾酒吧 |
| [08:46] | because as of tomorrow night, you’ll be wearing my tie. | 因为从明晚开始 你脖子上挂的就是小鸭领带了 |
| [08:51] | Our future child is so lucky. | 我们的孩子能免遭毒手了 |
| [08:53] | Wait. You’re not drunk? | 等下 你没喝醉吗 |
| [08:56] | Huh. I guess not. | 没有哦 |
| [08:59] | It’s a hustle! | 这是个圈套 |
| [09:00] | We gettin’ hustled! | 我们中计了 |
| [09:02] | Oh, this stinks. | 这招太损了 |
| [09:04] | This stinks to holy hell! | 把他打下地狱十八层都不未过 |
| [09:06] | He’s gonna win the bet! | 这次打赌肯定是他赢 |
| [09:07] | Baby, come on. Even if he was sober as a nun, | 宝贝 拜托 即使他跟修女一样清醒 |
| [09:10] | there’s no way he could do what these guys do. | 也不可能做到厨师的一招半式 |
| [09:12] | Exactly. I mean, to learn the trademark secrets | 就是 要是真心想学 |
| [09:16] | of Shinjitsu hibachi cooking, | 武士餐馆的招牌铁板烧手艺 |
| [09:18] | one would have to go all the way… | 那得到大老远跑到 |
| [09:21] | to Hoboken, New Jersey. | 新泽西的霍博肯去学 |
| [09:23] | Yeah, they have a school there. | 没错 他们在那儿有个学校 |
| [09:26] | It’s a six-month course. They teach you everything. | 只需六个月 包你样样精通 |
| [09:29] | How do you know that? | 你怎么知道的 |
| [09:30] | Maybe I looked it up on my phone just now. | 有可能是我刚刚在手机上查到的 |
| [09:32] | Then again, maybe not. | 也有可能 不是 |
| [09:42] | So Victoria’s getting married. | 所以你刚才说维多利亚要结婚了 |
| [09:43] | She’s getting married. | 她要结婚了 |
| [09:45] | I’m sorry. I should have told you that way earlier. | 对不起 我应该早点告诉你的 |
| [09:48] | No, no, it’s fine. | 不用 没关系 |
| [09:50] | You thought something was gonna happen. | 你误以为我们俩还有转机 |
| [09:52] | Like one percent. | 是有那么一点点小幻想 |
| [09:53] | Maybe slap on a ring next time. | 下次记得戴上戒指 |
| [09:55] | Well, the problem is, he hasn’t asked me yet. | 问题是 他还没向我求婚 |
| [09:57] | I found the ring in a box in his sock drawer. | 我在他装袜子的抽屉里发现戒指 |
| [10:00] | Wow! Guy’s got a whole drawer just for socks? | 哇 他居然有一个专门装袜子的抽屉 |
| [10:03] | Must be nice. | 那他的袜子一定很多 |
| [10:06] | So when’s Money Bags popping the question? | 那你的钻石王老五会什么时候求婚 |
| [10:08] | I’m pretty sure tomorrow. | 我肯定是明天 |
| [10:10] | He’s taking me out | 他会带我去 |
| [10:11] | to a really nice restaurant out in the Hamptons. | 汉普顿斯一家高档餐厅吃饭 |
| [10:13] | It’s right on the water, | 那是一家水上餐厅 |
| [10:14] | so afterwards we’ll take a walk on the beach in the moonlight. | 饭后我们可以在月光下手牵手 漫步沙滩 |
| [10:21] | You should probably go. | 你该走了 |
| [10:22] | I don’t know. It sounds pretty intimate. | 我也不知道 刚才你的描述让我心驰向往 |
| [10:26] | I’m serious. I feel like I misled you. | 我说真的 我总觉得自己误导你了 |
| [10:29] | Madam, I came here to wash your dishes. | 女士 我是来帮你洗碗的 |
| [10:33] | Nothing more. | 别无他意 |
| [10:34] | – Whoa! What was that!? – What was what? | -那是怎么回事 -什么怎么回事 |
| [10:37] | This guy and Barney just shared a look! | 这个人刚和巴尼交换了眼色 |
| [10:39] | Do you know him? | 你认识他吗 |
| [10:45] | They did it again! | 他们又来了 |
| [10:46] | This whole thing stinks, I tells ya! | 老娘告诉你们 这招太损了 |
| [10:49] | It stinks! | 会断子绝孙的 |
| [10:50] | Lily, are you really suggesting that Barney spent six months | 莉莉 你真的以为巴尼会花六个月的时间 |
| [10:54] | commuting back and forth to Hoboken | 来回奔波于霍博肯和纽约 |
| [10:57] | to learn a signature cooking style of a restaurant he doesn’t even like | 去学他不喜欢的那家餐馆的拿手绝活 |
| [11:00] | so he could win a bet he hadn’t even made yet? | 就为了赢一个那时还没打的赌吗 |
| [11:04] | Yeah, the whole thing stinks. | 对 这件事是够损的 |
| [11:06] | No, it’s not possible, okay? | 不 这不可能 |
| [11:08] | I was the one who said let’s go to Shinjitsu… | 我才是那个经常说要去武士餐馆的人 |
| [11:10] | Bless you. | 上帝保佑你 |
| [11:11] | How could Barney have… | 巴尼怎么可能… |
| [11:18] | You brilliant bastard. | 你个足智多谋的混蛋 |
| [11:20] | It’s all so obvious now. | 现在一清二楚了 |
| [11:22] | For the past, oh, I don’t know how long, five years, | 我不知道有多久了 大概五年吧 |
| [11:24] | every time I’ve said, “Let’s go to Shinjitsu,” | 每次我说 咱们去武士餐馆吧 |
| [11:26] | Bless you. | 上帝保佑你 |
| [11:28] | You’ve sneezed. | 你就打喷嚏 |
| [11:30] | Every time. | 每次都这样 |
| [11:32] | And little by little… | 慢慢地… |
| [11:34] | Let’s go to Shinjitsu. | 咱们去武士餐馆吧 |
| [11:36] | – Bless you. – Bless you. | -上帝保佑你 -上帝保佑你 |
| [11:37] | …you forged the association in my brain. | 你让我形成了一个条件反射 |
| [11:40] | So what should we do for dinner? | 我们晚饭吃什么 |
| [11:42] | Let’s go to Shinjitsu. | 咱们去武士餐馆吧 |
| [11:43] | – Oh, bless you. – Thanks. | -上帝保佑你 -谢谢你 |
| [11:45] | Until eventually… | 最后 |
| [11:46] | Yes, I know I said that we’d be back Sunday, | 没错 我是说我们星期天才回来 |
| [11:48] | but guess what? We are back now! | 但是我们现在就回来了 |
| [11:51] | Now what on earth… | 你到底 |
| [11:51] | Stop bouncing! | 别跳了 |
| [11:52] | What on earth would make you think that we’d be okay with this? | 你到底凭什么觉得我们会不介意 |
| [11:55] | Let’s go to Shinjitsu. | 咱们去武士餐馆吧 |
| [11:58] | When you were sick for a week last year, | 去年你生病的那一周 |
| [11:59] | I had Shinjitsu like six times. | 我去了六次武士餐馆 |
| [12:02] | You had the knife skills… | 你有手段 |
| [12:04] | you had the trigger… | 你有触发器 |
| [12:07] | All you needed then was to want something from me. | 你只需等着守株待兔 |
| [12:10] | And then one day… those somethings came a-busting out. | 然后有天 那两只兔子突然蹦了出来 |
| [12:16] | I am gonna have to walk this earth, | 虽然我的胸部惨遭巴尼毒手 |
| [12:18] | knowing Barney has touched my boobs. | 但我也会好好活下去的 |
| [12:21] | Yeah. It stays with you. | 对 一生的耻辱啊 |
| [12:23] | His email reminders don’t help. | 他个贱人会发邮件提醒你的 |
| [12:26] | Okay, Lily, this is ridiculous. | 够了 莉莉 这事太荒谬了 |
| [12:27] | If you want to call the bet off… | 如果你想取消这次打赌 |
| [12:29] | Great! The bet’s off! | 太好了 那就取消 |
| [12:30] | Let me finish. | 让我说完 |
| [12:32] | Here’s the deal: If you let me just see them– | 条件如下 如果你让我只看 |
| [12:35] | no touching, just looking– for one minute… | 不摸 只是盯着看 一分钟 |
| [12:38] | – 30 seconds. – For 30 seconds, | -三十秒 -三十秒 |
| [12:39] | in a well-lit photography studio… | 在一个光线充足的摄影室 |
| [12:40] | – In the alley. – In the alley… | -在一个巷子里 -在一个巷子里 |
| [12:42] | then we’ll cancel this entire wager completely. | 然后我们就彻底取消这次赌注 |
| [12:44] | Do we have a deal? | 行不行 |
| [12:47] | I totally think you should take the deal. | 我真心觉得你应该答应 |
| [12:49] | I don’t think we have a choice. | 我们别无选择了 |
| [12:50] | Go on, take the deal. | 行了 答应他吧 |
| [12:51] | I’ll… think about it. | 我 考虑考虑吧 |
| [12:56] | So you’re doing the dishes… | 刚才你说到你在洗碗… |
| [12:57] | I’m doing the dishes. | 我在洗碗 |
| [12:59] | All done. | 完工 |
| [13:01] | Congratulations. | 恭喜 |
| [13:02] | Your karmic slate is clean and lemony fresh. | 你的良心基石已经清洗干净 而且带股柠檬清香 |
| [13:06] | – Cheers. – Cheers. | -干杯 -干杯 |
| [13:08] | See, now I can start anew, | 瞧 现在我可以重新出发 |
| [13:10] | and hopefully end up as happy as you and, uh… | 并希望能和你们一样幸福 |
| [13:13] | Sorry, what’s his name? | 抱歉 他叫什么 |
| [13:14] | – Whose name? – Your fiancé-to-be. | -谁 -你的准未婚夫 |
| [13:16] | Oh! His name is Klaus. | 他叫克劳斯 |
| [13:18] | – Klaus. – Klaus. | -克劳斯 -克劳斯 |
| [13:20] | German name. | 德国名 |
| [13:21] | Yeah, German guy. Hmm. | 对 德国男人嘛 |
| [13:25] | When you were living in Germany, | 当你住在德国时 |
| [13:26] | and we were doing the whole long-distance thing… | 就是我们异地恋时 |
| [13:28] | wasn’t there a Klaus in your class? | 你班上是不是有个人叫克劳斯 |
| [13:30] | There was a Klaus in my class. | 是有个叫克劳斯的 |
| [13:31] | – And you and Klaus were close. – Not that close. | -你和克劳斯走得很近吧 -不是很近 |
| [13:34] | Yes, yes, you and the Klaus from your class were quite close. | 就是 你和你班上的克劳斯是走得很近 |
| [13:36] | Kind of close. | 普通近 |
| [13:37] | – Was that your Klaus? – My Klaus? | -他是你的克劳斯吗 -我的克劳斯 |
| [13:39] | – In your class. – In my class? | -你班上的那位 -我班上的那位 |
| [13:41] | Is your Klaus the kind of close Klaus from your class? | 你的克劳斯是班上和你走得很近的那位克劳斯吗 |
| [13:43] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [13:46] | You didn’t cheat on me with Klaus, did you? | 你没背着我和他乱搞吧 |
| [13:49] | No. No, I did not. | 没 没 绝对没有 |
| [13:51] | Okay, new question. | 好 下一个问题 |
| [13:52] | After we broke up, how long were you single | 我们分手后 你空窗了多久 |
| [13:55] | before you and Klaus started dating? | 才和克劳斯恋爱的 |
| [13:57] | Oh, how long… um, well, we broke up in April, so… | 多久 我们是四月分手的 |
| [14:02] | a day and a half. | 一天半 |
| [14:04] | Oh, you have got to be kidding me! | 天啊 你在跟我开玩笑吧 |
| [14:07] | I’m sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [14:08] | So I’ve spent the last six years feeling like | 我在过去六年里 |
| [14:11] | I completely betrayed you, when in truth, you… | 都觉得是我背叛了你 结果你… |
| [14:14] | No, you know what? | 不 你知道吗 |
| [14:20] | Okay. Fine. | 好吧 行啦 |
| [14:21] | Just let yourself off the hook on a technicality! | 你快摆脱你的罪恶感吧 |
| [14:24] | Forget the fact that you did cheat on me! | 忘记你曾经背叛过我的事实 |
| [14:26] | Forget it? I will never forget it. Okay? | 忘记 我永远都不会忘记 |
| [14:30] | I will never stop regretting it, | 我会一直忏悔下去 |
| [14:31] | because what we had meant that much to me! | 因为我们的过往对我而言十分重要 |
| [14:33] | I just… I wish it had meant something to you, too. | 我只是 希望在你心里也同样重要 |
| [14:35] | Are you kidding? | 你开什么玩笑 |
| [14:37] | – I loved you! – Did you? | -我曾深爱你 -是吗 |
| [14:40] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [14:42] | We had such an amazing time together. | 我们曾一起度过很美好的日子 |
| [14:46] | Do you remember that night | 你还记得那晚 |
| [14:47] | we found that crazy videotape of Barney? | 我们发现了巴尼那卷疯狂的录影带 |
| [14:49] | Game night. | 游戏之夜 |
| [14:51] | We played that ridiculous game Marshall invented. | 我们玩马修发明的那个扯淡游戏 |
| [14:53] | Marshgammon. | 马修棋 |
| [14:54] | We’ve played it a few times since. I still don’t get it. | 后来我们又玩过几次 但我还是没搞懂 |
| [14:57] | Remember the night we met? | 记得我们相遇的那晚吗 |
| [14:59] | I remember you not letting me kiss you. | 我记得你不让我吻你 |
| [15:02] | Remember why? | 记得为什么吗 |
| [15:03] | You had this ridiculous idea | 因为你有个古怪的想法 |
| [15:05] | that the moment leading up to the kiss… | 认为双唇慢慢靠近的过程 |
| [15:07] | The drum roll. | 那种暧昧的气氛 |
| [15:08] | …is as good as the kiss itself. | 和接吻一样美妙 |
| [15:10] | Isn’t it? | 不是吗 |
| [15:12] | Well, it’s certainly more innocent. | 而且更加纯洁 |
| [15:14] | It’s completely harmless. | 完全无害 |
| [15:15] | Completely. | 绝对无害 |
| [15:29] | – Oh, my god! – Oh no. | -天啊 -不妙 |
| [15:30] | No, no-no-no-no-no. | 情况不妙 |
| [15:31] | – I should not have done that. – No, that was me. | -我不该这么做 -不 是我的错 |
| [15:34] | I let you come wash my dishes! | 是我让你来洗我的盘子 |
| [15:36] | I said my “Oven” needed “Cleaning”! | 我还说我的”烤箱”需要”清洁” |
| [15:38] | I invited you into a porno! | 这完全是A片的桥段 |
| [15:41] | No. | 不 |
| [15:41] | You were right. This is fate. | 你说的对 这是天意 |
| [15:43] | I needed to see you one more time | 你就是上天派来 |
| [15:45] | in order to know for sure about Klaus. | 检测我对克劳斯的心意 |
| [15:48] | And…? | 然后呢 |
| [15:49] | And… | 然后 |
| [15:54] | I have a bus to catch. | 我要去赶巴士了 |
| [16:00] | Fine, you can see my boobs! | 好吧 给你看咪咪 |
| [16:02] | To the alley! | 直奔后巷 |
| [16:04] | This seems unfair. | 这不公平 |
| [16:06] | I mean, I get that I’m the only person | 我知道自己是唯一一个 |
| [16:08] | not allowed to see this, but… | 不能大饱眼福的 可 |
| [16:09] | it just, it-it seems unfair. | 这就是 就有点儿不公平 |
| [16:12] | Come on, Lily, hurry up. | 来吧 莉莉 爽快点 |
| [16:14] | Guys… | 各位 |
| [16:15] | You know, I’m all for honoring a bet, but who invited Takumi? | 愿赌服输我赞成 可拓海是谁请来的 |
| [16:20] | Sorry, bro. I tried. | 抱歉 兄弟 我尽力了 |
| [16:26] | What’s going on? What am I missing? | 什么情况 我错过什么好戏了 |
| [16:28] | Are they out yet? What do they look like? | 咪咪蹦出来没 长什么样 |
| [16:30] | Look, I don’t want to know! | 算了 我不想知道 |
| [16:31] | Just tell me the kind of coin. | 告诉我那两点如何就行了 |
| [16:33] | Do you know how long 30 seconds is? | 你知道三十秒有多长吗 |
| [16:35] | It’s going to be five seconds of… | 先来五秒这样 |
| [16:39] | followed by 25 seconds of…. | 接着二十五秒这样 |
| [16:42] | I mean, yes, seeing Lily’s boobs | 没错 看一眼莉莉的咪咪 |
| [16:45] | is all you’ve ever wanted, but come on. | 一直是你梦寐以求的 可需要这样吗 |
| [16:48] | All he’s ever wanted… | 梦寐以求 |
| [16:51] | Lily, stop! | 莉莉 停 |
| [16:53] | Don’t you see? | 还没看出来吗 |
| [16:54] | This was his plan all along! | 从头到尾都是他的阴谋 |
| [16:57] | He let us think he knows how to do all this Shinjitsu stuff, | 他让咱们误信他会耍铁板烧的全套招式 |
| [17:01] | just so he could get you out here | 好把咱们骗来这里 |
| [17:02] | whipping out your milk-makers! | 让你秀奶瓶子 |
| [17:05] | You son of a bitch! | 你这绝世贱男 |
| [17:07] | The bet is back on! | 赌局重开 |
| [17:10] | Nice try, Barney! | 好计 巴尼 |
| [17:12] | Nice try. | 好计 |
| [17:28] | Maybe I was wrong. | 可能我错了 |
| [17:30] | Well, I guess that’s everything you asked me to do, is it not? | 我想你要求的我都做到了 不是吗 |
| [17:32] | Oh, wait! The shrimp in the pocket. | 等等 还有口袋虾仁 |
| [17:35] | A modern classic. | 时髦中的经典 |
| [17:37] | And now… | 现在 |
| [17:38] | for one minute on second base… | 等着我的是上二垒一分钟 |
| [17:40] | with a firm yet sensual squeeze… | 紧握却不失放荡的揉捏 |
| [17:43] | Nothing can stop him now. | 全宇宙都阻挡不了他了 |
| [17:45] | One thing can. | 有一样东西可以 |
| [17:46] | Make that two things. | 应该是一对 |
| [18:08] | No!! | 不要啊 |
| [18:11] | Yeah! Yeah! | 好耶 |
| [18:14] | So you take her to the bus… | 刚你说到你送她去搭巴士 |
| [18:16] | I take her to the bus. | 我送她去搭巴士 |
| [18:19] | Well, this feels familiar. | 这一幕似曾相识 |
| [18:20] | You leaving, me kind of wanting to say, “Don’t go.” | 你要走 我想说”别走”却说不出口 |
| [18:24] | Little late for that. | 现在说迟了点吧 |
| [18:25] | Little bit. | 是有点儿 |
| [18:27] | – Don’t go. – Ted… | -别走 -泰德 |
| [18:29] | I’m sorry. I just… | 对不起 我只是 |
| [18:31] | Why didn’t I say it then? | 为什么我那时候没说 |
| [18:33] | Why’d I let you get on that plane? | 为什么我让你上了飞机 |
| [18:35] | Why didn’t I get on it with you? | 为什么我没有和你一起去 |
| [18:39] | What would our lives be right now, if we had just… | 我们的生活现在会是怎样 如果当初我们 |
| [18:42] | held on? | 没有放手 |
| [18:45] | Would I have still run into you at this party tonight… | 今晚我还会在舞会上偶遇你吗 |
| [18:47] | or would we have been there together? | 又或者 是我们一起去的 |
| [18:49] | We’d go home… | 我们回家 |
| [18:52] | to our home? | 回我们的家 |
| [18:54] | You cook. I do the dishes. | 你做饭 我洗碗 |
| [18:59] | I’m happy that you’re happy. | 你开心 所以我开心 |
| [19:00] | But damn it. | 可我搞砸了 |
| [19:04] | What if? | 如果没有呢 |
| [19:05] | Do you really want to know the answer to that? | 你真的想听答案吗 |
| [19:09] | No. | 不想 |
| [19:11] | I think it would kill me. | 会让我痛不欲生的 |
| [19:13] | Good-bye, Ted. | 再见 泰德 |
| [19:26] | And that was it. | 就是这样了 |
| [19:29] | Now she’s probably engaged. | 现在她可能已经订婚了 |
| [19:34] | Maybe it’s for the best. | 可能这样最好吧 |
| [19:39] | All right. Well… | 好的 那么 |
| [19:42] | We’re gonna duck out. | 我们走了”呀” |
| [19:45] | Sorry to leave you with the bill. | 抱歉让你撅个”鸭嘴”买单了[Duckbill鸭嘴兽] |
| [19:47] | Oh, guys, it’s gonna be a good year. | 伙计们 这将是精彩的一年 |
| [19:53] | I’m glad you guys can laugh, | 我很高兴你们笑得出来 |
| [19:54] | ’cause I think I’m gonna be physically ill. | 我觉得自己真的要生病了 |
| [19:57] | Coming down with a mallardy? | 禽流感吗 |
| [19:58] | Oh, they look hungry. There you go. | 它们看起来饿了 吃吧 |
| [20:01] | Here you go. | 吃吧 |
| [20:02] | Kids, there was one part I left out. | 孩子们 有一段我没有说 |
| [20:05] | Good-bye, Ted. | 再见 泰德 |
| [20:09] | Okay, yes. What’s the answer? | 我想知道 答案是什么 |
| [20:14] | There is a reason that it didn’t work out between you and me, | 我们之所以分手的原因 |
| [20:19] | but it’s not Germany. | 不是德国 |
| [20:21] | And I’m willing to bet it’s the same reason none of your other | 而且我打赌 这个也是你过去六年来 |
| [20:23] | relationships in the last six years have lasted either. | 所有恋情都失败了的原因 |
| [20:27] | It’s Robin. | 就是罗宾 |
| [20:29] | No. | 不可能 |
| [20:30] | Yes. | 事实如此 |
| [20:32] | She is so much bigger in your world than you realize. | 她在你心中的地位 比你想象的还要重要 |
| [20:34] | And this thing that you’re all doing, you and Barney and Robin, | 还有你们三个 你 巴尼 罗宾 |
| [20:38] | where the three of you hang out at the bar night in, night out, | 整天整夜在酒吧里一起厮混 |
| [20:41] | like you’re all just buddies? | 却自以为你们只是朋友 |
| [20:44] | That doesn’t work. Trust me. | 这种好日子是不会长久的 相信我 |
| [20:46] | You-You’ve got it all wrong. | 你误会了 |
| [20:48] | I’m right about this. | 我是对的 |
| [20:52] | Good-bye, Ted. | 再见 泰德 |
| [20:57] | And sure enough, she was right. | 的确 她是对的 |
| [21:00] | It didn’t work, we just didn’t realize it yet. | 果然没有长久 只是当时我们还没意识到 |