| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | In the fall of 2011, Lily and Marshall received | 2011年秋天 莉莉和马修收到 |
| [00:02] | a surprising gift from Lily’s grandparents: | 一份莉莉祖父母送的惊喜大礼 |
| [00:05] | their house in Long Island. | 一座长岛的房子 |
| [00:06] | Lily and Marshall decided to sell it | 莉莉和马修因为一个简单的理由 |
| [00:08] | for one simple reason. | 决定将其出售 |
| [00:10] | It’s Long Island. | 那可是在长岛啊 |
| [00:12] | I don’t want to spend my Saturday in Long Island. | 我可不想在长岛度周六 |
| [00:14] | I know, babe, | 我知道 宝贝 |
| [00:15] | but the realtor staged the place with fake furniture | 但是中介在房子里布置了些道具家具 |
| [00:18] | and she wants us to check it out before the open house. | 她想在开售前 让我们去看看 |
| [00:20] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [00:21] | Can we at least do it on the fake bed? | 至少我们能在道具床上做爱吧 |
| [00:23] | I’m embarrassed that you have to ask. | 这种求欢的事还是我来吧 |
| [00:26] | So, they headed out to Long Island, | 于是他们出发去了长岛 |
| [00:28] | and when they walked in the door… | 当他们一推开那扇门… |
| [00:31] | We’ll take it! | 我们买了 |
| [00:33] | We-We can’t take it. | 我们不能买 |
| [00:34] | We’re the ones selling it. | 我们就是卖方 |
| [00:36] | We are selling it, right? | 我们是要卖房 对吧 |
| [00:38] | Baby, your grandparents gave you this house outright. | 宝贝 你的祖父母把这房子彻底交给你了 |
| [00:40] | So, the way I see it, we have five options. | 在我看来 我们有五个选择 |
| [00:42] | 1, sell it. | 第一 卖掉它 |
| [00:43] | 2, year-round haunted house. | 第二 空着它 变鬼屋 |
| [00:45] | 3, giant fence around the perimeter, chimp sanctuary. | 第三 在周围竖起大栅栏 建个猩猩保护区 |
| [00:50] | There’s already a tire swing in the backyard. | 反正后院已经有轮胎秋千了 |
| [00:51] | 4, we destroy it with sledgehammers. | 第四 用锤子凿了它 |
| [00:54] | I like four. | 我喜欢第四个 |
| [00:55] | 5, we move in, raise our children | 第五 我们搬进来 抚养孩子长大 |
| [00:58] | and make this our family home. | 把这里变成我们的家 |
| [01:01] | Till they graduate. | 直到他们毕业 |
| [01:03] | Then we destroy it with sledgehammers. | 然后我们再用锤子凿了它 |
| [01:06] | As a family. | 全家齐上阵 |
| [01:09] | No, this is crazy! | 不 不能这么想 |
| [01:10] | We are New York people. | 我们可是纽约人 |
| [01:12] | We have a big, beautiful apartment that we love. | 我们有心爱的公寓 它又大又漂亮 |
| [01:15] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [01:15] | But something happened to Lily and Marshall that day. | 但那天 马修和莉莉发生了点状况 |
| [01:18] | Something that happens to all New Yorkers | 所有从外地返回纽约家中的 |
| [01:20] | who return home from anywhere other than New York. | 纽约人都会遇到这种状况 |
| [01:24] | Their big, lovely apartment… | 他们又大又温馨的公寓 |
| [01:26] | Huh. That’s weird. | 哟 真是奇了怪了 |
| [01:29] | …shrank. | 瞬间缩水 |
| [01:41] | Okay, after Thanksgiving, I’m cutting out carbs. | 好吧 感恩节一过 我就节食 |
| [01:54] | 老爸老妈浪漫史 | |
| [02:01] | Now, kids, it had been a rough couple weeks for Barney. | 孩子们 在过去的几周 巴尼过得很不易 |
| [02:04] | First, he cheated on his girlfriend with Robin, | 他先是背着女友 跟罗宾偷情 |
| [02:07] | then he broke up with his girlfriend for Robin, | 接着为了罗宾 跟女友分手 |
| [02:09] | then Robin chose Kevin over him. | 最后罗宾选择了凯文 放弃了他 |
| [02:11] | So he was kind of in a bad place. | 所以他有点萎靡不振 |
| [02:14] | You all right? | 你还好吧 |
| [02:16] | Why wouldn’t I be all right? | 为什么会不好 |
| [02:17] | Barney’s single again! | 巴尼恢复单身啦 |
| [02:18] | It’s what America’s been clamoring for. | 美国总算盼到这一天了 |
| [02:20] | You just went through a break-up. | 你刚刚结束一段恋情 |
| [02:22] | That’s usually when people do something crazy. | 人们通常会在这时候做傻事 |
| [02:24] | If you were a girl, you’d have cut bangs | 如果是个女孩 她就会减掉刘海 |
| [02:25] | and be dating you by now. | 然后跟你这样的人约会 |
| [02:27] | Just promise me you won’t do something crazy. | 向我保证 你不会去做傻事 |
| [02:29] | I promise I won’t do something crazy. | 我保证不会做傻事 |
| [02:31] | Don’t worry, he’s gonna do something crazy. | 别担心 他很快就会做傻事 |
| [02:34] | In fact, I think I’m done with girls. | 其实 我觉得我受够女人了 |
| [02:37] | I’m not sure I even like them anymore. | 我甚至不确定是否还喜欢她们 |
| [02:38] | Based on all the stuff you’ve done to them over the years, | 鉴于你多年来对她们的所作所为 |
| [02:40] | I’m not sure you ever liked them. | 我不确定你是否喜欢过她们 |
| [02:42] | I’m serious. | 我是说真的 |
| [02:43] | Come on, you love girls. | 拜托 你爱死女人了 |
| [02:45] | If anyone should be done with girls, it’s me. | 如果真要说谁受够女人了 那也应该是我 |
| [02:46] | Look at the year I’ve had. | 瞧瞧我这一年过得 |
| [02:48] | Zoey, Victoria, the Slutty Pumpkin. | 苏伊 维多利亚 淫荡南瓜妹 |
| [02:50] | Now I’m worried you’re gonna do something crazy. | 现在换我担心你会做傻事了 |
| [02:52] | I’m not gonna do something crazy. | 我可不会做傻事 |
| [02:54] | And yes, I’m gonna do someththg crazy, too. | 没错 我也离做傻事不远了 |
| [02:58] | But girls, man. | 但是女人啊 |
| [03:00] | Girls. | 女人啊 |
| [03:01] | – You know what would kick ass? – Being gay? | -你知道最绝的一招是什么吗 -变成同志 |
| [03:04] | Being gay would kick ass! | 变成同志最牛逼了 |
| [03:06] | Word. Guys understand each other. | 同意 男人之间互相理解 |
| [03:08] | Imagine a relationship where, | 想象有这么一段关系 |
| [03:10] | instead of talking about feelings all the time, | 不必每时每刻表达爱意 |
| [03:12] | you just play some Madden, eat a pizza, | 俩人一起只是打电动吃披萨 |
| [03:14] | give each other a happy, roll over | 一起嗑药 一起嗨 |
| [03:16] | and have some cuddle-free shut-eye. | 更不用抱着一起睡 |
| [03:18] | Bro, for what it’s worth, | 哥们儿 不管怎样我要说 |
| [03:19] | if we were both gay, you’d be my first call. | 如果我们都是同志 你会是我的首选伴侣 |
| [03:22] | Would you mind calling Marshall and telling him that? | 那你介意打给马修 告诉他这话吗 |
| [03:25] | ‘Cause he thinks… | 因为他一直以为… |
| [03:26] | No, this is only in a scenario | 不行 我只是说假如 |
| [03:27] | where just you and I are gay, not Marshall. | 你和我是同志 与马修无关 |
| [03:29] | But if all three of us were gay, | 但如果我们三个都是同志 |
| [03:31] | you’d pick me over Marshall, right? | 你还是会选我 而不是马修 对吧 |
| [03:33] | If all three of us were gay? | 如果我们三个都是同志 |
| [03:34] | Girlfriend, we would all three of us have some fun. | 姐妹 我们仨一定会爽翻天的 |
| [03:38] | Damn right we would. | 我们绝对会的 |
| [03:43] | We’re not gay. | 我们不是同志 |
| [03:44] | Nope. Stuck with girls. | 没错 女人才是我的菜 |
| [03:47] | I wish men could have children | 我真希望男人可以 |
| [03:49] | on their own, like sea horses. | 自己生孩子 就像海马一样 |
| [03:51] | Are you saying what I think you’re saying? | 你这话不会是我以为的那种意思吧 |
| [03:52] | They have a little pouch. | 他们育儿袋太小了 |
| [03:53] | They should be called sea kangaroos. | 它们该叫海袋鼠 |
| [03:55] | No, y-you want kids? | 不对 你想要孩子吗 |
| [03:58] | Maybe I’ve kind of lately been thinking | 或许我最近是开始有点考虑 |
| [04:01] | about the whole wife and kids thing. | 娶妻生子之类的事 |
| [04:04] | Just minus the wife. | 只是娶妻这一环省了 |
| [04:06] | You could always go it alone. | 男人也可以把孩子拉扯大 |
| [04:08] | Like Mr. Drummond on Diff’rent Strokes. | 就像《细路仔》里的杜蒙德先生 |
| [04:08] | 美国80年代电视剧 杜蒙德一人抚养三个孩子 | |
| [04:10] | Yeah, but that was the ’80s, | 是啊 可那是在80年代 |
| [04:12] | when you could just swing by any inner-city playground in your limo | 那时你还能坐着豪车 随便路过城里任一球场 |
| [04:15] | and scoop up some kids. | 接俩孩子回家养呢 |
| [04:16] | Simpler times. | 更方便快捷 |
| [04:18] | I guess it’s better to have someone in it with you anyway, you know? | 我想抚养孩子这种事 还是得个帮手好 |
| [04:20] | Lifetime partnership. | 比如终身伴侣 |
| [04:21] | The only partnership in my life | 我生命中唯一 |
| [04:23] | that has stood the test of time is this one. | 经得起时间考验的伴侣关系就是 |
| [04:25] | The sacred bond of man and bro. | 神圣的兄弟情谊 |
| [04:28] | Maybe we should start a family together. | 或许我们该一起组建家庭 |
| [04:35] | Are you kidding? | 开什么玩笑 |
| [04:36] | This place is huge. | 这地方大得很 |
| [04:38] | I mean, look, I can dance all crazy in here. | 瞧 我还能大摇大摆地跳舞呢 |
| [04:41] | Oh! Sh… | 靠… |
| [04:44] | Listen, um, Robin, | 听着 罗宾 |
| [04:45] | are you okay with us all doing Thanksgiving out in East Meadow? | 你同意今年感恩节都在东梅多过吗 |
| [04:45] | 东梅多是长岛的一个村庄 | |
| [04:49] | Uh, yeah, I guess that’d be nice. | 好呀 应该会好玩吧 |
| [04:50] | Oh, great! | 太好了 |
| [04:51] | And then after Thanksgiving, Lily and I were thinking | 我和莉莉打算感恩节过后 |
| [04:54] | that we would just stay at the house | 在那房子住一段时间 |
| [04:56] | until, you know… | 住到… |
| [04:58] | we die. | 终老 |
| [05:00] | What? | 什么 |
| [05:01] | No! | 不行 |
| [05:03] | You can’t move to Long Island! | 你们不能搬去长岛 |
| [05:05] | But this house is so nice. | 可房子那么漂亮 |
| [05:07] | It’s big, and it’s clean, | 宽敞又整洁 |
| [05:09] | and if there’s cockroaches, | 如果有蟑螂 |
| [05:11] | they respect us enough to sneak around. | 看到我们也会谦虚低头绕路走 |
| [05:13] | Listen to yourself. | 瞧瞧你说那话儿 |
| [05:14] | This is Pregnancy Brain all over again. | 这全是孕期犯傻症在作祟 |
| [05:17] | No, I’m done with Pregnancy Brain. | 不 我的犯傻期已经过了 |
| [05:19] | I’ve moved on to weird pregnancy sex dreams. | 现在是奇幻春梦期 |
| [05:19] | 孕期妇女会在孕中期性欲大增 而且睡觉时容易做梦 | |
| [05:23] | Officer. | 长官好 |
| [05:25] | You know. You know. | 你懂的 你懂的 |
| [05:28] | I’m-I’m just saying, you’re not in the right mind | 我只是说 你们现在脑子不清楚 |
| [05:31] | to be making this decision right now. | 不适宜做重大决定 |
| [05:33] | You know what? Robin’s right. | 罗宾说得对 |
| [05:35] | We are in no state of mind to make this kind of decision. | 我们现在的状态的确不适宜做重大决定 |
| [05:38] | Thank you. And now you’re stepping off the crazy bus. | 谢谢 世界终于恢复正常了 |
| [05:40] | We let the universe decide. | 我们让老天爷做主吧 |
| [05:42] | And now you’re back on board. | 世界又开始疯狂了 |
| [05:44] | You hear that, Universe? | 听到了吗 老天爷 |
| [05:46] | If you send us a sign in the next… | 如果你在接下来的24小时内 |
| [05:48] | 24 hours, | 给我们指示 |
| [05:50] | then we’re moving to Long Island! Okay? | 我们就搬去长岛 说好咯 |
| [05:54] | Go. | 计时开始 |
| [05:54] | Hey, guys, | 伙计们 |
| [05:55] | for the last time, this place is enormous– | 我再说最后一次 这地方大得很 |
| [05:58] | Geez, how many lamps do you have? | 烦死了 你们家到底有多少盏灯啊 |
| [06:01] | It’s genius! | 这想法太妙了 |
| [06:03] | Instead of throwing away your life marrying some girl, | 与其将人生浪费在某个女人身上 |
| [06:05] | you just go splitsies on a kid with your best bro! | 还不如和你的铁哥们儿一起养个孩子呢 |
| [06:08] | I wouldn’t have to choose | 我不必纠结于选择 |
| [06:10] | between dating and having a family. | 约会还是成家 |
| [06:11] | Hell, I could bring the kids on dates! | 因为我可以带孩子去约会 |
| [06:14] | And a broken home? | 家庭破碎 |
| [06:15] | Um, what’s that? | 那是什么 |
| [06:16] | Our kids will never know, | 我们的孩子绝不会知道 |
| [06:18] | ’cause we’re never gonna split up! | 因为我们永远不会分开 |
| [06:19] | Why would we? | 为什么要分开 |
| [06:20] | I mean, sure, when your wife walks in | 当然 如果被孩子她妈撞见 |
| [06:22] | on you banging a hot flight attendant, you get a divorce. | 你和火辣空姐的好事 她铁定跟你离婚 |
| [06:24] | But when your bro-parent walks in on you | 但如果是被孩子他爹撞见了 |
| [06:26] | banging a hot flight attendant… | 结果就太不同啦 |
| [06:27] | You get five of these bad boys, right up high! | 应该为这种家庭击掌欢呼 |
| [06:30] | And you totally join in, right?! | 毫不犹豫加入同欢 对吧 |
| [06:33] | – Oh, no, there’s the line. – That’s the line. | -不行 这是底线 -这是底线 |
| [06:34] | We found the line. It’s good we know where it is. | 我们要有分寸 还好我们知道底线在哪儿 |
| [06:36] | Hey, guys. | 伙计们 |
| [06:39] | We have an announcement. | 我们有事宣布 |
| [06:41] | So what you’re saying is, | 所以你们的意思是 |
| [06:42] | if you’re meant to move to Long Island, | 如果你们注定要搬去长岛 |
| [06:44] | some sign from the universe | 那么上天的指示 |
| [06:46] | will magically appear at your doorstep? | 就会奇迹般地出现在你家门前吗 |
| [06:47] | Now, kids, | 孩子们 |
| [06:48] | I don’t think there was a knock on the door at that exact moment, | 罗宾话音刚落那一刻 其实没人敲门 |
| [06:51] | but for the purposes of this story… | 但为了凸显故事效果… |
| [06:56] | Hi, I’m Clive. | 你好 我是克莱夫 |
| [06:57] | I live upstairs from you. | 我就住在你们楼上 |
| [06:58] | Is this your sign? | 这是你们的牌子吗[“牌子”与”指示”同音] |
| [06:58] | 房屋待售 | |
| [07:01] | I don’t know, Clive. | 我不清楚 克莱夫 |
| [07:04] | Is it? | 是吗 |
| [07:05] | Oh, did we leave that outside? | 我们把这牌子忘外面了吗 |
| [07:07] | Yeah, we’re selling our house in Long Island. | 对 我们准备卖掉我们在长岛的房子 |
| [07:09] | Oh. Too bad you’re not selling this place. | 可惜你们卖的不是这里 |
| [07:12] | I’d love to turn mine into a duplex. | 我想把我家改造成复式公寓呢 |
| [07:13] | And I’d give you a really good price for it, | 而且我愿意出高价 |
| [07:15] | because I am so rich. | 因为我富得流油 |
| [07:19] | He did not say that. | 这句他可没说 |
| [07:20] | His shoes did. | 看鞋子就知道了 |
| [07:22] | Okay, the point is, we got the sign. | 好吧 重点是我们收到上天的指示了 |
| [07:25] | We’re moving to East Meadow. | 我们要搬去东梅多咯 |
| [07:27] | Let’s get some champagne. | 咱们去拿点香槟吧 |
| [07:28] | And just like that, Lily and Marshall | 就这样 莉莉和马修 |
| [07:30] | were beginning a new chapter in their lives. | 即将开启他们人生的新篇章 |
| [07:32] | Which meant only one thing for us… | 这让我们别无选择 唯有… |
| [07:34] | We’re having a baby! | 抱个孩子回家养吧 |
| [07:36] | Bro-parents activate! | “一个孩子两个爹”计划启动 |
| [07:43] | – Hey, let’s talk baby names! – Barney… | -我们讨论一下孩子的名字吧 -巴尼 |
| [07:44] | Oh, my God! That was my first choice, too. | 天啊 这名字也是我的首选 |
| [07:46] | No, listen. You and I are drunk. | 不 听着 咱俩都喝醉了 |
| [07:50] | Which means there’s a chance that adopting a baby– | 所以说 就算真有机会收养孩子 |
| [07:54] | no matter how cute he is in my head | 不管我现在把他想得多可爱 |
| [07:56] | with his little cowboy outfit on and he’s riding our dog | 穿着小牛仔装 像骑马一样 |
| [07:59] | like a horse and we also have a dog, | 骑着我们的狗 对 还要养条狗 |
| [08:01] | purebred Golden, but it’s okay, she’s a rescue– | 纯种金毛 孩子骑着安全 因为这狗会救人 |
| [08:01] | 金毛常被训练为救援犬 | |
| [08:04] | might not be a good idea. | 这可能不是个好主意 |
| [08:06] | You’re right. | 没错 |
| [08:08] | So let’s go home, take some aspirin, | 那我们就各自回家 吃片阿司匹林 |
| [08:11] | drink lots of water, | 多喝点水[醒酒] |
| [08:13] | and then see if it’s still a good idea tomorrow. | 看看明天 是否还觉得这是个好主意 |
| [08:17] | It’s still a good idea! | 仍然是一个好主意 |
| [08:18] | It’s totally still a good idea! | 绝对是个好主意 |
| [08:20] | We’re having a baby! | 抱个孩子回家养吧 |
| [08:23] | Kids, I cannot stress this enough: | 孩子们 不得不强调一下 |
| [08:25] | Barney and I were going through a tough time. | 当时我们处于”王老五变二百五”的艰难时期 |
| [08:29] | You’re not leaving, and that’s final. | 你们不准搬 就这么说定了 |
| [08:31] | Look what I bought at 4:00 a.M. In New York City. | 瞧瞧我凌晨四点在纽约买到了什么 |
| [08:34] | A bootleg VHS of a very, very popular Korean movie, | 一盒超级流行的韩国电影走私录影带 |
| [08:39] | this genuine Lenny Vintone purse | 一个路一·威等的正品提包 |
| [08:39] | Lenny Vintone名称缩写也为LV | |
| [08:42] | and the number of a man who can get me a kidney. | 一个能贩卖肾脏的男人的电话号码 |
| [08:45] | Do that on Long Island. | 在长岛能搞到这些吗 |
| [08:47] | Look, Robin, we appreciate that you want us to stay in the city, | 罗宾 我们很感激你的大力挽留 |
| [08:50] | but this is what we want. | 但是我们已经决定了 |
| [08:52] | I mean, you understand, right? | 你懂我们的 对不 |
| [08:55] | No. | 不懂 |
| [08:56] | Here are a few fun facts about Long Island. | 长岛有几怪 |
| [09:00] | Number one: it’s Brooklyn’s fart trail.. | 第一怪 布鲁克林的屁通通吹到长岛 |
| [09:04] | So Barney and I– and again, going through a tough time, | 不得不再次强调 巴尼和我 |
| [09:06] | can’t stress that enough– | 当时正处于艰难时期 |
| [09:08] | found an adoption agency Web site | 我们找到一个领养机构的网站 |
| [09:09] | and filled out their online application. | 并填写在线申请书 |
| [09:11] | Name Barney Stinson. | 名字 巴尼·斯丁森 |
| [09:14] | Ted Mosby. | 泰德·莫斯比 |
| [09:16] | Address… | 地址 |
| [09:17] | Oh, put my address in Westchester. | 写我的地址 韦斯切斯特 |
| [09:19] | They’ll want to see we’ll be | 他们更愿意看到 |
| [09:20] | raising this child in a good environment. | 孩子在一个良好的环境中长大 |
| [09:21] | You know, the suburbs. | 就是 乡下 |
| [09:23] | What? No. | 什么 不要 |
| [09:24] | – All my guys are here. – Your guys? | -我的人都在这里 -你的人 |
| [09:27] | Yeah. You know how I got a guy for everything? | 对啊 我所有事情都交给他们代办 |
| [09:29] | Well, they’re all in New York. | 他们全在纽约 |
| [09:30] | My suit guy, my shoe guy, my ticket guy, my club guy. | 做西服的 做皮鞋的 买票的 泡吧的 |
| [09:32] | And if I don’t have a guy for something, | 如果我没人可用了 |
| [09:33] | then I have a guy guy to get me a guy. | 我还有专员帮我找人来用 |
| [09:35] | And oddly enough, his name is Guy. | 说来稀奇 那个人就叫”专员” |
| [09:37] | Okay, fine. How about this? | 好吧 这样如何 |
| [09:39] | We stay in the city during the week, | 周一至周五我们待在城里 |
| [09:41] | then on the weekend, country house in the burbs! | 一到周末 我们就去郊外骑马 |
| [09:43] | – This is why bro-parenting works! – Totally! | -这就是一个孩子两个爹的好处 -正是 |
| [09:46] | And with your salary plus my salary, | 你的工资再加上我的工资 |
| [09:49] | we can totally afford two places. | 我们完全可以供两套房子 |
| [09:54] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [09:54] | So… uh, you’re gonna keep your job? | 难道你…还打算继续上班 |
| [10:00] | Robin, this discussion is closed. | 罗宾 讨论到此为止吧 |
| [10:02] | The universe told us to do it, so we’re doing it. | 这是上天的指示 所以我们听命接旨 |
| [10:04] | Well, the universe gets it wrong sometimes. | 老天爷也会有失算的时候 |
| [10:08] | Remember when Marshall was trying to decide between | 还记得马修在环境律师 |
| [10:10] | becoming an environmental lawyer and working at a bank? | 和银行职员之间犹豫不决的那事吗 |
| [10:13] | That’s a funny story. | 这是个有趣的故事 |
| [10:14] | Marshall was fed up with his job at GNB and was | 马修厌倦了在巨人国家银行上班 |
| [10:17] | thinking about leaving it all behind, | 考虑着要不要狠下心来辞职 |
| [10:18] | so he and Lily agreed he should wait for a sign | 所以他和莉莉一致同意 |
| [10:21] | from the universe to tell him what to do. | 等待上天的指示 |
| [10:22] | Then one day… | 于是某天 |
| [10:24] | 以下场景皆出自《捉鬼敢死队》 | |
| [10:25] | 救护车 | |
| [10:31] | 待售 | |
| [10:33] | Of course. | 果然 |
| [10:34] | It’s so clear. | 天意啊 |
| [10:35] | It’s been right there all along. | 原来答案就在眼前 |
| [10:37] | I have to call Lily. | 我要打给莉莉 |
| [10:40] | Excuse me. Excuse me, sir. | 抱歉 打扰了先生 |
| [10:41] | I’m sorry, but, um, can I please borrow your… | 抱歉 我能借你的… |
| [10:45] | – Ernie Hudson? – Yes. | -欧尼·哈德逊 -正是在下 |
| [10:45] | 欧尼·哈德逊曾主演电影《追鬼敢死队》 | |
| [10:47] | Can I borrow your phone? | 能借你的电话一用吗 |
| [10:50] | Who you gonna call? | 你要打给谁 |
| [10:53] | And did Marshall become a Ghostbuster? | 那马修有变成捉鬼敢死队的队员吗 |
| [10:55] | That firehouse is still for sale. | 消防站那房子至今没卖出去 |
| [10:57] | Even Ernie Hudson begged you not to go through with that. | 连欧尼·哈德逊都求你不要加入 |
| [11:00] | Ernie Hudson is a coward! | 欧尼·哈德逊是个懦夫 |
| [11:03] | Of course I’m gonna keep my job. | 我当然要继续工作啦 |
| [11:04] | Why wouldn’t I keep my job? | 我为什么要辞职 |
| [11:06] | Well, I mean, this whole architecture thing… | 我的意思是 建筑对你来说… |
| [11:09] | isn’t it more of a hobby? | 爱好多过工作吧 |
| [11:11] | Excuse me? | 什么 |
| [11:12] | And now we’re fighting. You know what? | 好 开始吵架了 算了 |
| [11:14] | Forget I said anything. | 忘记我刚说的话 |
| [11:15] | No! No, no, no. We’re having this discussion. | 不不不 我们还没讨论完呢 |
| [11:18] | Architecture is my life’s work. | 建筑是我终生的事业 |
| [11:20] | Why don’t you quit your job? | 你为什么不辞职呢 |
| [11:21] | I don’t even know what it is you do for a living. | 我都不知道你靠什么谋生 |
| [11:24] | “What it is I do for a living?” | “我靠什么谋生” |
| [11:26] | I work, Ted, 14 hours a day | 当然是工作了 泰德 |
| [11:29] | so that our baby can have food | 当你坐在那儿信手涂鸦时 |
| [11:31] | and clothes and a nice house, | 老子一天上十四个小时班 |
| [11:33] | while you sit around doodling pictures of buildings. | 我们的孩子才有得吃 有得穿 有得住 |
| [11:36] | That’s “What it is I do.” | 这就是我谋生的方法 |
| [11:38] | You know what? Screw this. I’m gonna go to the bar. | 我现在不想讨论了 老子要去酒吧 |
| [11:40] | Yeah, right, right, ’cause the answer’s always | 去吧 去吧 你以为灌醉自己 |
| [11:41] | at the bottom of a bottle! | 就能解决问题吗 |
| [11:43] | Wait, wait, wait! Hold it! | 等等 站住 |
| [11:45] | Brainstorm. Brainstorm. | 多动脑子勿动气 快动脑 |
| [11:48] | Nobody quits their job. | 谁都不用辞职 |
| [11:51] | We get a nanny. | 我们找一个保姆 |
| [11:52] | Dibs on the nanny. | 保姆归我 |
| [11:53] | No. No banging the nanny. | 不 不准勾搭保姆 |
| [11:55] | Ted, please don not dig in on this whole | 泰德 请不要现在就开始制定 |
| [11:56] | no-banging-the-nanny policy. | “不准上保姆”这种硬性规定 |
| [11:58] | Okay, fine. We’ll get two nannies. | 好吧 那我们找两个保姆 |
| [11:59] | One for banging, one for childcare. | 一个用来滚床单 一个用来看孩子 |
| [12:02] | Slash banging. Dibs on both nannies! | 兼滚床单 俩保姆都归我 |
| [12:04] | Just think of it, Ted, you and me, | 想象一下 泰德 你和我 |
| [12:06] | living together, with our kid, | 一起生活 有个孩子 |
| [12:08] | – my two hot nannies, our pet cobra… – What? | -两个热辣的保姆 一条宠物眼镜蛇 -什么 |
| [12:11] | A kid needs a pet cobra, Ted. | 孩子需要一只宠物眼镜蛇 泰德 |
| [12:13] | Don’t be a pill about this. | 少啰嗦 |
| [12:14] | And we’ll have amazing weeklong parties, | 欢乐派对连连开 个个开足一整周 |
| [12:16] | and there’ll be swords and ninja stars lying around. | 满屋子都是刀剑和忍者飞镖 |
| [12:19] | That’s when I realized: | 那一刻我终于明白 |
| [12:20] | adopting a baby with a friend? Crazy. | 和朋友一起领养个孩子 是疯狂 |
| [12:24] | Adopting a baby with Barney? Freaking nuts. | 和巴尼一起领养个孩子 是真他妈疯狂 |
| [12:28] | I can’t adopt a baby with you, Barney. | 我不能和你一起领养孩子 巴尼 |
| [12:30] | Why not? | 为什么不能 |
| [12:30] | Because we don’t even have one yet | 因为孩子还没领进家 |
| [12:32] | and you’re already a terrible father. | 你就表现得像个差劲的父亲 |
| [12:34] | Oh, I get it. | 我懂了 |
| [12:36] | You want one of the nannies. | 你肯定是想上保姆 |
| [12:38] | Well, you can’t have ’em! They’re mine! | 门儿都没有 两个都是我的 |
| [12:40] | So you’re just gonna have to get yourself a third nanny. | 所以麻烦你另请一个保姆吧 |
| [12:43] | Except dibs on the third nanny! Good day! | 对了 第三个也归我 祝您愉快 |
| [12:47] | Which brings us to Thanksgiving. | 话说感恩节将近 |
| [12:49] | Marshall, Lily and Robin were heading out | 马修 莉莉和罗宾出发 |
| [12:50] | to Long Island early to get ready. | 去长岛做准备 |
| [13:00] | Okay, how is this even possible?! | 好吧 这怎么可能出得去 |
| [13:03] | ‘Cause how did we even get it in here?! | 这就跟生孩子一样 费死劲儿了 |
| [13:07] | Okay, I change my mind. I want an epidural. | 看到你这个大孩子 我坚决要换成无痛分娩 |
| [13:10] | You guys are crazy. | 你们都疯了吧 |
| [13:12] | This place is enormous. | 这个地方大得很 |
| [13:14] | I mean, look arou… | 环顾四周 |
| [13:16] | Have you never heard of overhead lighting?! | 你他妈的没听过有个东西叫吊灯啊 |
| [13:23] | You’re right. | 你说的没错 |
| [13:24] | I get it. | 我懂了 |
| [13:26] | This place is great. | 这个地方太棒了 |
| [13:29] | Um, excuse me. Where is the restroom? | 问一下 洗手间在哪里 |
| [13:31] | – Oh. Right there. – Oh, good, great. | -就在那 -太好了 |
| [13:34] | I’m just gonna go in there and… | 我要进去 |
| [13:36] | not come out until you promise never to move away! | 除非你俩答应我不搬家 否则我就他妈的不出来 |
| [13:41] | It’s a good thing we have three bathrooms. | 还好我们有三个洗手间 |
| [13:45] | Hey, Barney. | 巴尼 |
| [13:46] | Uh, listen, sorry about the other day | 那天我说你是个糟糕的父亲 |
| [13:48] | when I said you’d be a terrible father. | 我对此深感抱歉 |
| [13:50] | You had no reason to think otherwise. | 你这么想很正常 |
| [13:51] | Totally understandable. I’m not mad. | 完全可以理解 我没生气 |
| [13:54] | Thanks. And, uh, let’s be honest, | 谢谢 说实话 |
| [13:56] | we were both acting a little crazy. | 那天我们都有点疯狂 |
| [13:57] | I don’t think either of us is truly ready for the responsibility of… | 我觉得我们俩都没准备好承担责任… |
| [14:01] | Daddy’s home. | 爸爸回来咯 |
| [14:09] | Uh, Barney, uh, where did you get this baby? | 巴尼 这宝宝从哪儿弄来的 |
| [14:13] | Please. | 拜托 |
| [14:14] | Did you adopt it? | 是你领养的吗 |
| [14:15] | Please. | 拜托 |
| [14:17] | Do you have a baby guy? | 你有个能帮你弄到小孩的人吗 |
| [14:19] | Did Guy the guy guy get you a baby guy? | 是不是找”专员”这个专员 帮你找了个能弄到小孩的人 |
| [14:22] | Ted, we should get going. | 泰德 我们得走了 |
| [14:23] | No, no, no. I’m not going anywhere with you. | 不不不 我哪都不跟你去 |
| [14:26] | For all I know, | 从目前情况看 |
| [14:26] | I could be aiding and abetting a kidnapping. | 我很有可能在协助及唆使绑架 |
| [14:29] | Sh…bro-ddy’s not mad. | 爸比没有在生气 |
| [14:30] | He’s just being a wittle loud. | 他只是讲话有点点大声 |
| [14:32] | He wuvs you! Yes, he does! | 他可耐你了 真的哦 |
| [14:35] | – This is insane! – We’ll be waiting outside. | -疯了疯了 -我们在外面等你 |
| [14:37] | – Come on. – No, I can’t. | -快点 -不行 我做不到 |
| [14:39] | Yeah. Na-na-na. | 听不到听不到 |
| [14:41] | But then we went outside. | 但我们还是出门了 |
| [14:44] | Oh, my goodness. | 我的天 |
| [14:45] | – What a beautiful baby. – Thank you. | -好漂亮的宝宝哦 -谢谢 |
| [14:48] | By the way, my friend and I, we’re not a couple. | 顺便说一下 我和我朋友不是一对 |
| [14:50] | We are two straight guys who are single | 我们只是共同抚养孩子的 |
| [14:52] | and we have a baby. Just so you know. | 两个单身直男 别误会哦 |
| [14:54] | Look at this sweet girl. | 好可爱的小姑娘哦 |
| [14:56] | Hi. I was just telling this first girl, | 我刚刚跟这个女生说过 |
| [14:57] | my friend and I, both straight, | 我和我朋友 都是直男 |
| [14:59] | both available, and we have a baby. | 都是单身 小孩也有了 |
| [15:01] | Oh, who is this little angel? | 这个小天使是谁呀 |
| [15:03] | Okay, real quick: me and him, | 好吧 再简单说遍 我和他 |
| [15:05] | not gay, single, have a baby. | 直男 单身 有小孩 |
| [15:06] | We should look into having a sign made. | 我们应该做个告示牌 |
| [15:08] | Kids, again, we were going through a difficult time. | 孩子们 再次强调 当时日子真心艰难呀 |
| [15:10] | But this part was kind of fun. | 不过这部分还是挺开心的 |
| [15:12] | Aw…! So cute! | 好可爱哦 |
| [15:16] | This is awesome. | 妙 太妙了 |
| [15:18] | Right? | 对不对 |
| [15:20] | Robin, come out and talk to us. | 罗宾 出来咱们谈谈吧 |
| [15:22] | I’m not coming out of this bathroom | 除非这世界停止疯狂 |
| [15:24] | until everyone stops acting crazy! | 否则我就他妈的不出来 |
| [15:26] | No one is being crazy. | 这世界很正常 |
| [15:28] | Again, for the purposes of this story… | 再次强调 我是为了凸显故事效果… |
| [15:31] | Ted and I have a baby. Crazy! | 泰德和我有小孩了 很疯狂吧 |
| [15:35] | What the hell is that? | 到底怎么回事 |
| [15:37] | Guys, this is Hurricane Stinson-Mosby. | 各位 她叫小旋风·史丁森·莫斯比 |
| [15:40] | Mosby-Stinson. | 是莫斯比·史丁森 |
| [15:41] | You named your baby Hurricane? | 你为孩子取名叫”小旋风” |
| [15:44] | That is… | 真是 |
| [15:45] | ultimately inconsiderate to the child | 太不为宝宝的未来考虑了 |
| [15:48] | who has to live with that name. | 这名字可要跟着她一辈子呀 |
| [15:50] | Okay, how the hell does Barney have a baby? | 巴尼怎么把小孩弄到手的 |
| [15:53] | No idea. Super confused. | 不知道 完全没头绪 |
| [15:54] | I’m finding it best to just sort of go with it. | 我觉得最好别深究 |
| [15:56] | She’s super cute, though, right? | 她超级可爱的 对吧 |
| [16:00] | Wait a minute. | 等下 |
| [16:00] | Oh, guh! Hurricane dookied in her drawers. | 哎呀呀 小旋风把粑粑拉里面了 |
| [16:05] | Ha-ha! Poopy pants! | 哈哈 拉裤裤了 |
| [16:08] | She needs a new diaper. | 她要换个新尿布 |
| [16:10] | Right. Where do you keep your diapers? | 对 你的尿布放哪了 |
| [16:12] | We don’t have any. | 我们没有 |
| [16:13] | You don’t… Wow. | 你们居然没有 |
| [16:15] | Okay. I guess I’ll go buy some. | 好吧 看来我要去买点了 |
| [16:19] | You’re gonna be a mom and you don’t have any diapers? | 你已经是准妈妈了 怎么还没准备尿布呢 |
| [16:21] | Lord, watch over that child. | 天啊 看好那臭孩子啊 |
| [16:24] | Uh, okay. | 好吧 |
| [16:26] | Come here, you. | 宝贝儿 阿姨抱抱 |
| [16:27] | So, there’s a talk of a cheese plate? | 刚是有人说有干酪盘吃吗 |
| [16:43] | Cheese? | 来点奶酪[笑一个] |
| [16:43] | 国外在拍照时喜欢喊”Cheese” 相当与中国的”茄子” | |
| [16:44] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [16:49] | If you don’t mind me asking… | 如果不介意的话 我想问 |
| [16:51] | What-what is this all about? | 到底出什么事吗 |
| [16:53] | I mean, you are one of the most strong, independent, | 你是我认识的人中最坚强 最独立 |
| [16:57] | non-locking-themselves-in- | 最不可能在感恩节 |
| [16:59] | a-bathroom-on-Thanksgiving people I know. | 把自己锁在厕所里的人 |
| [17:02] | Why-why are you so upset about us moving? | 为什么我们搬家能让你如此失控 |
| [17:06] | Maybe I just need you guys more than you think. | 或许我比你们想象中需要你们 |
| [17:09] | Is this about more than us moving? | 所以与搬家无关 你在借题发挥吗 |
| [17:14] | This is good cheese. | 这奶酪味道不错 |
| [17:17] | Robin? | 罗宾 |
| [17:19] | Yeah? | 干嘛 |
| [17:20] | Do you think I should’ve become a Ghostbuster? | 你觉得我该去当捉鬼特工队员吗 |
| [17:23] | I think you made the right call, buddy. | 我相信你当初的决定是对的 老兄 |
| [17:26] | Okay, Ted, I’m not gonna ask you where Barney got this baby. | 泰德 我就不问巴尼从哪弄来这孩子了 |
| [17:29] | But do you have any idea why? | 可你知道他为什么这样做吗 |
| [17:32] | Well, a few nights ago, we were talking… | 前几天 我们聊到了 |
| [17:34] | you know, “We hate girls, we wish we were gay,” | “女生真讨厌 咱俩要是搞基就好了” |
| [17:37] | just guy stuff. | 像这样的大男人话题 |
| [17:39] | And we kind of sort of decided to… | 然后我们当时似乎决定 |
| [17:43] | adopt a baby. | 领养一个孩子 |
| [17:44] | Yeah, that’s crazy. | 这可真疯狂 |
| [17:45] | I know. | 我就说嘛 |
| [17:47] | – Is it, though? – Yes. | -真的很疯狂吗 -确定一定以及肯定 |
| [17:48] | I know. | 我就说嘛 |
| [17:50] | – But is it, though? – Yes. | -没有那么疯狂吧 -否认否决以及否定 |
| [17:52] | Well, so what if it’s crazy? | 就算是疯狂又如何 |
| [17:54] | I’ve been ready to meet someone to start a family with | 我一直在等待一个能跟我组建家庭的人 |
| [17:55] | for a long time now, and I keep not meeting her. | 可我至今还没遇上 |
| [17:57] | Barney is one of my best friends in the world, | 巴尼是我世上最好的朋友 |
| [17:59] | we rarely fight, | 我们很少吵架 |
| [18:01] | and once we iron out the whole pet cobra thing, | 一旦我们谈妥宠物眼镜蛇这个问题 |
| [18:02] | we will be amazing dads. | 我们会是绝佳老爸 |
| [18:04] | Why shouldn’t we try this? | 我们为什么不能尝试一下呢 |
| [18:06] | When’s the last time you fed her? | 你上一次喂她是什么时候 |
| [18:08] | She had some root beer on the train. | 在火车上给她喝了点根汁汽水 |
| [18:10] | Oh, Ted. And I’m sorry, | 天啊 泰德 我很抱歉 |
| [18:12] | but you cannot call a baby Hurricane. | 你可不能给孩子取名小旋风 |
| [18:14] | Actually, her name is Sadie. | 其实 她的名字叫赛迪 |
| [18:16] | James, what are you doing here? | 詹姆斯 你到这儿来干嘛 |
| [18:18] | Did Barney not tell you | 巴尼没告诉你们 |
| [18:19] | that we were coming for Thanksgiving? | 我们要来过感恩节吗 |
| [18:21] | Uh, no. | 没有 |
| [18:22] | Then he probably also did not tell you | 那他可能也没告诉你们 |
| [18:24] | that he was babysitting our new daughter. | 他在照看我们新领养的女儿 |
| [18:27] | This is your daughter? | 这是你的女儿吗 |
| [18:29] | Oh, thank God. | 谢天谢地 |
| [18:30] | And congratulations. | 恭喜你们 |
| [18:32] | Thanks. Come here. | 谢了 过来吧 |
| [18:36] | I guess this is good-bye, Hurri… Sadie. | 看来得说再见了 小旋 赛迪 |
| [18:40] | Your name is Hurricane. Don’t ever forget it. | 你名叫小旋风 要永记心中哦 |
| [18:44] | Go with him. | 让爸爸抱 |
| [18:45] | Come here. That a girl. | 来吧 乖女儿 |
| [18:47] | Hey, Ted, | 泰德 |
| [18:48] | I overheard your little speech. | 我不小心听到了你那番话 |
| [18:51] | It’s not crazy. | 你们没有发疯 |
| [18:53] | About ten years ago, | 十年之前 |
| [18:54] | my best friend and I nearly did the same thing. | 我和我的好友差点做了同样的事 |
| [18:57] | She was single, I was single, we both wanted a family. | 我俩都单身 我们都想有个家 |
| [19:01] | It made sense. | 这么做不足为奇 |
| [19:02] | But now? | 可现在呢 |
| [19:04] | Every day, we thank our lucky stars that we didn’t do it. | 每天我们都感谢上天 没让我们做傻事 |
| [19:08] | ‘Cause what she found with her husband | 因为她和她丈夫所拥有的 |
| [19:10] | and what I found with mine– | 我和我爱人所拥有的 |
| [19:13] | it was worth the wait. | 值得为之等待 |
| [19:16] | Hurricane’s a cool name. | 小旋风这名挺酷的 |
| [19:17] | Isn’t it, Tom? | 我就说嘛 汤姆 |
| [19:21] | The pet store was closer, | 宠物店离这里比较近 |
| [19:22] | so I just got her some wee-wee pads. | 我就给她买了点狗用尿不湿 |
| [19:23] | Oh, I also got this. | 我还买了这个 |
| [19:24] | It’s beef-flavored and it’s good for her teeth. | 这是牛肉味的 对她长牙有帮助哦[狗咬胶] |
| [19:28] | James! Tom! Hey! | 詹姆斯 汤姆 你们来了 |
| [19:31] | Lily… | 莉莉 |
| [19:32] | did you get the e-mail that I sent you about inviting | 你收到我那封关于邀请了詹姆斯和汤姆 |
| [19:36] | James and Tom to Thanksgiving? | 来过感恩节的邮件了吗 |
| [19:38] | I sent it to your CompuServe. That’s your main one, right? | 我发到你美邮网邮箱里了 你常用那个对吧 |
| [19:38] | CompuServe已于2009年关闭邮箱服务 | |
| [19:42] | Happy Thanksgiving, bro. | 感恩节快乐 老弟 |
| [19:43] | Thanks. Hi. Hey! | 谢了 |
| [19:51] | All right, you got me. | 好吧 让你发现了 |
| [19:52] | James is my baby guy. | 詹姆斯就是我的人贩子 |
| [19:54] | But these past three hours– magical, right? | 可刚才这三小时真是不可思议 对吧 |
| [19:57] | We can do this! Say we can do this. | 我们能搞定的 快说我们能搞定 |
| [20:00] | We can’t do this. | 我们搞不定的 |
| [20:02] | Sorry, dude. | 抱歉了 老兄 |
| [20:03] | We got to wait for the real thing… | 真爱需要耐心等待 |
| [20:05] | no matter how tough it gets. | 衣带渐宽终不悔 |
| [20:11] | It gets pretty tough. | 为伊消得人憔悴 |
| [20:12] | I know it does, buddy. | 那也没办法 兄弟 |
| [20:17] | I have some time before dinner, right? | 离晚饭开始还有点时间吧 |
| [20:18] | I’m going to go… I’m gonna take a little walk. | 我要出去散散步 |
| [20:20] | All right. | 行 |
| [20:25] | God. | 苍天啊 |
| [20:43] | Are we still friends? | 我们还是朋友吧 |
| [20:44] | Hope so. | 我希望如此 |
| [20:48] | Good. | 那就好 |
| [20:48] | ‘Cause get this. | 听好了 |
| [20:50] | Ted almost adopted a baby. | 泰德差点领养了一个孩子 |
| [20:53] | Crazy, right? | 疯狂吧 |
| [20:55] | Poor guy’s going through some stuff. | 可怜的家伙 日子不好过啊 |
| [20:57] | He actually tried to rope me into it. | 他还想把我也拖下水 |
| [20:59] | Can you imagine me being someone’s dad? | 你能想象我当爹的样子吗 |
| [21:03] | I’m pregnant. | 我怀孕了 |