| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Kids, have I ever told you | 孩子们 我跟你们说过 |
| [00:03] | the story of how I met your father? | 我是如何遇见你们老爸的吗 |
| [00:05] | Well, I’ll just skip ahead | 我就快进一下 |
| [00:06] | to the moment I told him I was pregnant. | 快进到我告诉他我怀孕的时候 |
| [00:10] | W… What happened? | 怎…怎么啦 |
| [00:13] | Did I pass out? | 我晕过去了吗 |
| [00:14] | Not exactly. | 不全是 |
| [00:16] | I’m pregnant. | 我怀孕了 |
| [00:21] | Are you sure you’re not just getting fat? | 你确定你不是长胖了 |
| [00:26] | Oh, yeah. | 哦 对 |
| [00:28] | So, um, you’re pregnant. | 这么说 你怀孕了 |
| [00:31] | Yeah. | 是的 |
| [00:32] | Huh. | 哈 |
| [00:34] | Looks like nobody told your boobs. | 看来你的咪咪还不知道啊（怀孕后乳房会变大） |
| [00:38] | What happened? | 怎么了 |
| [00:41] | Did I pass out? | 我昏过去了吗 |
| [00:42] | Oh, my… | 噢 我的 |
| [00:43] | Please stop hitting me! | 求求你别打我 |
| [00:44] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [00:46] | Are… Are you sure you’re… | 你… 你确定你… |
| [00:51] | Well, no, not positive. | 没有 不确定 |
| [00:52] | I’m a week late. | 大姨妈晚了一周了 |
| [00:54] | But I’m never late; it’s a point of pride with me. | 可我从来都不晚 这可是我引以为傲的事 |
| [00:56] | I’m going to go | 我准备下周一 |
| [00:57] | see the doctor on Monday to find out for sure. | 去看医生来确认下 |
| [00:59] | Until then, not a word of this to anyone. | 在那之前 你不许跟任何人讲 |
| [01:03] | Not even Kevin? | 连凯文也不说吗 |
| [01:05] | I mean, it’s probably his. | 我觉得 孩子可能是他的 |
| [01:07] | I’ve spent years training my boys | 我花费了数年的时间 |
| [01:09] | to swim the other way. | 来训练我的小蝌蚪朝相反的方向游 |
| [01:11] | Kevin and I haven’t had sex yet. | 凯文和我还没做过 |
| [01:14] | If I’m pregnant, you’re the dad. | 如果我怀孕了 你是孩子的父亲 |
| [01:18] | That’s wonderful! | 那太棒了 |
| [01:20] | Huh? | 啥 |
| [01:21] | I’m gonna be a daddy! | 我要当爸爸了 |
| [01:29] | 本集之后进入冬歇 下一集2012年1月10日播映 | |
| [01:41] | Okay, one scotch for me, | 好了 一杯威士忌是给我的 |
| [01:43] | one iced tea on the rocks glass for Mommy. | 一杯加冰的冰茶给孩儿他妈 |
| [01:45] | Stop it. | 闭嘴 |
| [01:46] | Sorry, sorry. | 抱歉 抱歉 |
| [01:47] | Keeping it secret. | 我保密 |
| [01:49] | Oop, I think I gave you the wrong one. | 不好 我好像把我的给你了 |
| [01:52] | Here, let me just… | 来 给我 |
| [01:53] | Give it to me. Drop… let go. | 赶紧把它交给我 放手 |
| [01:55] | Take it away from you. | 给哥放手 |
| [01:59] | Barney, why are you so happy about this? | 巴尼 为什么怀孕这事让你那么高兴 |
| [02:01] | Because this is perfect. | 因为这好极了 |
| [02:02] | I want to be a dad. | 我想当爸爸 |
| [02:04] | This is not good news. | 这可不是好消息 |
| [02:05] | I have a boyfriend. | 我有男朋友了 |
| [02:07] | Yeah, but if Kevin weren’t around… | 是啊 如果凯文不在的话 |
| [02:09] | It doesn’t matter! | 不是这个问题 |
| [02:10] | I don’t want kids. | 我不想要孩子 |
| [02:12] | I’ve never wanted kids, | 我从来都不想要孩子 |
| [02:13] | and never, in a million years, will I ever want kids. | 以后也不会 在未来的一百万年里 我也想不要孩子 |
| [02:17] | Sorry, kids. | 孩子们 对不住哈 |
| [02:20] | I can’t have a baby. | 我不想要孩子 |
| [02:22] | Hey, guys! | 嗨 朋友们 |
| [02:23] | Guess what this is! | 猜猜这是什么 |
| [02:27] | One of your socks? Boom! You’re huge. | 你的袜子 靠 你真是个巨人 |
| [02:29] | No, it’s our unborn son’s Christmas stocking. | 不 是我还未出生儿子的圣诞袜 |
| [02:32] | Grandma Gunderson started knitting it | 冈德森祖母在我和莉莉结婚的那天 |
| [02:34] | the day Lily and I got married. | 就开始织这只袜子了 |
| [02:36] | She died before she could finish. | 可是在她织完之前 她就去世了 |
| [02:40] | I miss stockings. | 我真怀念圣诞袜 |
| [02:41] | My stepdad Clint made us get rid of anything | 我继父克林特让我们扔掉所有的 |
| [02:43] | that reminds him of the commercialization of Christmas. | 能让他觉得圣诞节商业化的东西 |
| [02:46] | I thought you said he dresses up as Santa. | 我记得你说过他扮成圣诞老人的事儿 |
| [02:48] | Yeah, but, uh, to protest gender stereotypes, | 是啊 呃 那是为了抗议性别定势 |
| [02:51] | he plays Santa as a woman. | 他扮成了圣诞老娘 |
| [02:52] | Though, he keeps the beard. | 尽管如此 圣诞老娘还留着大胡子 |
| [02:54] | The result is disturbing. | 结果非常令人纠结 |
| [02:57] | Well, we should go. | 我们要走了 |
| [02:58] | We have to get to We B Babies | 我们得去爱婴园 |
| [03:00] | so that we can register for our shower. | 为我们的送礼会登记下(为新娘或即将分娩的妇女等举行的送礼会） |
| [03:03] | No can do. | 我去不了 |
| [03:04] | Um, I have a big project that I’m working on. | 我还得做个大项目 |
| [03:08] | This is Richard Holdman’s house in East Meadow. | 这是东梅多地区理查德・霍德曼的房子 |
| [03:12] | Last year, he had the most visited Christmas display | 去年 他的圣诞装饰 |
| [03:15] | in the tri-state area. | 是三州地区最受欢迎的 |
| [03:16] | But not this year. You know why? | 但是 不是今年哟 知道为啥吗 |
| [03:18] | Because Big Fudge has come to town, | 因为大软糖来了 |
| [03:21] | and he brought his two friends: | 而且带来了他的两个朋友 |
| [03:23] | Mannim… Steamroller. | 曼宁…斯迪姆柔勒 |
| [03:26] | Game on. | 比赛开始 |
| [03:28] | Are you okay? | 你没事儿吧 |
| [03:29] | Yeah. | 没事儿 |
| [03:30] | Uh, it’s just, um… | 只是 |
| [03:32] | I hate Mannheim Steamroller. | 我讨厌曼宁・斯迪姆柔勒（美国非常受欢迎的圣诞歌曲组合） |
| [03:34] | Isn’t there anyone else you can use? | 就没有别人可以帮你了吗 |
| [03:36] | Come on! Who am I gonna use if not the Steamroller?! | 拜托 除了他们 我还能找谁啊 |
| [03:39] | I don’t know. AC/DC? | 我不知道 AC/DC不行么（AC/DC是70年代的摇滚乐队） |
| [03:41] | AC/DC | Ac/dc? |
| [03:43] | Robin, do you have any idea | 罗宾 你有没有想过 |
| [03:45] | why they call them Mannheim Steamroller? | 他们为什么叫曼宁 斯迪姆柔勒 |
| [03:48] | Because they rock… so hard, so festively, | 因为他们牛逼 哄哄 而且那么喜庆 |
| [03:52] | that steam comes out of your brain. | 以至于你脑子都热得 |
| [03:56] | As it melts. | 一边冒烟一边熔化了 |
| [03:58] | So I have to go to We B Babies by myself? | 这么说 我得一个人去爱婴园了 |
| [04:01] | Robin and I will go with you. | 我和罗宾陪你去 |
| [04:05] | Barney, what are we doing here? | 巴尼 我们来这儿干嘛 |
| [04:07] | I want to show you that having a kid | 我想让你明白养小孩这事儿 |
| [04:09] | is nothing to be afraid of. | 没什么好怕的 |
| [04:12] | Kids. Stop. | 孩子们 别闹了 |
| [04:18] | Okay, first on the registry: | 好了 第一项 |
| [04:19] | nipple butter. | 咪咪霜 |
| [04:20] | Uh-oh. | 额哦 |
| [04:21] | As you breast-feed, | 当你给小孩喂奶的时候 |
| [04:22] | your nipples stretch out, like, four inches | 你的乳头会长长些 大概有10厘米哟 |
| [04:24] | and get all dry and cracked. | 然后变的很干还会开裂 |
| [04:26] | The nipple butter stops the bleeding. | 乳头霜能遏制出血 |
| [04:29] | My four-inch nipples are going to crack and bleed?! | 我十厘米长乳头会开裂而且会流血啊 |
| [04:33] | Yes, but while the baby is gnawing on your bleeding nips, | 对 但是当宝宝在吸你流血的乳头时 |
| [04:36] | look what she’ll be wearing. | 看看他会穿着什么小衣服哟 |
| [04:44] | Insane Duane? | 疯狂的杜安 |
| [04:48] | Barney? | 巴尼 |
| [04:50] | Insane Duane was your father’s best friend, | 疯狂的杜安曾经是你们爸爸最好的朋友 |
| [04:53] | back in the days before he met me or your Uncle Ted. | 回到他认识我和你泰德叔叔之前 |
| [04:58] | We’re going back to her place. | 我们准备去她住的地方了 |
| [04:59] | Boom! | 嘣 |
| [05:00] | All right, you win! | 好吧 你赢了 |
| [05:02] | Here’s 20 for picking up a girl with only one word. | 这是二十块钱 是你只用一个字就勾到MM的 |
| [05:04] | And here’s another 20 for that word being “Boner.” | 这是另外的二十块钱 因为那个词是“错误” |
| [05:06] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [05:08] | I’ll meet you back here in an hour when I’m done with, uh… | 一个小时以后 我和那个那个谁办完事后就来找你 |
| [05:14] | Ah, who cares what her name is; | 额 谁会在乎她的名字是什么 |
| [05:15] | she won’t be around long enough for it to matter. | 她不会待太久 所以名字什么的无所谓啦 |
| [05:17] | Nice! | 好样的 |
| [05:21] | Shh… | 嘘 |
| [05:24] | I can’t believe I haven’t seen you around. | 我好久都没见到你了 |
| [05:26] | Well, after Sheila and I had that quickie, | 额 我和谢拉很快办完事之后 |
| [05:29] | my life’s been playdates, preschools and poops. | 我就忙着等孩子们出生 上幼儿园还有拉大便之类的事情了 |
| [05:34] | I haven’t set foot in a bar in years. | 我已经有几年都没踏进过酒吧的大门了 |
| [05:36] | You stopped drinking? | 你不喝酒了吗 |
| [05:37] | Oh, I still drink. | 哦 我还在喝 |
| [05:42] | Vaginal numbing spray. | 阴道麻木喷雾 |
| [05:44] | Apparently, after child birth, | 显然 生完孩子后 |
| [05:45] | your hoo-ha looks like Rocky Balboa’s face. | 你的“妹妹”就会变得像拳王洛奇的脸 |
| [05:48] | – You can’t have a baby! – I can’t have a baby! | -你不能生孩子 -我不能生孩子 |
| [05:52] | The next day, we went to the doctor. | 第二天 我们去看医生了 |
| [05:54] | Well, Mrs. Scherbatsky, | 好了 舍巴斯基女士 |
| [05:56] | I’m sure that you and your husband… | 我确定你和你的丈夫 |
| [05:58] | Uh, he’s not my husband. | 额 他不是我丈夫 |
| [05:59] | Oh, I’m so sorry. | 噢 对不起 |
| [06:00] | Your boyfriend then. | 你的男朋友 |
| [06:01] | He’s not my boyfriend. | 他不是我男朋友 |
| [06:02] | Oh, bozhe. | 哦 额滴神 |
| [06:03] | All right, well, I will just cut to the chase. | 好吧 我就直奔主题了 |
| [06:05] | Wait! Wait. | 等一下 |
| [06:07] | All right. | 好了 |
| [06:09] | Okay. | 好 |
| [06:11] | All right, we’re ready. Good. | 好了 我们准备好了 很好 |
| [06:12] | You are not pregnant. | 你没有怀孕 |
| [06:14] | Yeah! | 耶 |
| [06:16] | – Oh, yeah! – Yeah! | -噢 耶 -耶 |
| [06:17] | That’s what I’m talking about! | 这就是我想说的 |
| [06:22] | Yeah, you know, you know! | 耶 你懂的 你懂的 |
| [06:24] | Again,sorry kids. | 再次对不起 孩子们 |
| [06:28] | Hey, mister. | 你好 先生 |
| [06:30] | Are you putting up all these Christmas lights? | 你要把这些圣诞灯挂起来么 |
| [06:32] | Oh, kid, by the time I’m done, | 哦 孩子 在我完工后 |
| [06:34] | you’re gonna be able to see this son of a bitch from outer space. | 你可以从外太空看到这堆东西哟 |
| [06:37] | Ah, cool. | 哇 不错 |
| [06:39] | I wanted to put lights on our house, | 我想把这些灯都挂在房子上 |
| [06:41] | but my dad says he’s too busy with work and stuff. | 可我爸爸说他太忙了 |
| [06:46] | Hey, what do you say, uh, you come back here next weekend | 嘿 你看这样吧 你下个周末 |
| [06:50] | and help me out? | 愿意来给我帮忙吗 |
| [06:52] | Yeah! | 耶 |
| [06:53] | You’ve got yourself a deal. | 就这么说定啦 |
| [06:55] | I’m Scott. | 我是史考特 |
| [06:56] | I’m… Mr. Eriksen. | 我是 艾瑞克森先生 |
| [06:59] | Thanks, Mr. E. | 谢谢 埃先生 |
| [07:04] | Mr. E. | 埃先生 |
| [07:05] | Looks like some little scamp just earned the right | 就像一些小流氓刚刚拥有 |
| [07:08] | to put the Vikings helmet on baby Jesus. | 把维京人队的头盔戴到耶稣婴儿头上的权利一样 |
| [07:12] | Later that week, as I was enjoying every second | 那周以后 当我在享受 |
| [07:15] | of not being pregnant… | 没有怀孕的每一秒的时候 |
| [07:16] | Next on Teenage Mommies… | 接下来的青少年母亲 |
| [07:18] | But you said you would watch Bella. | 你不是说过你会照顾贝拉吗 |
| [07:20] | I have cheerleading practice. | 我得带啦啦队训练啊 |
| [07:23] | Sucks to be you, Braces. | 你真惨 布雷斯 |
| [07:26] | Oh. Um… | 哦 额 |
| [07:28] | Yello! | 哟呼 |
| [07:32] | Uh, yeah, I can come back in. | 额 好 我可以回来 |
| [07:35] | Robin, we ran some tests last week. | 罗宾 我们上周做了一些检查 |
| [07:38] | This is going to be difficult to hear. | 这事有些不太容易接受 |
| [07:42] | And then the doctor said a bunch of medical stuff that… | 然后这医生说了一大堆医学上的东西 |
| [07:46] | well, the gist of it was this. | 好了 重点是 |
| [07:49] | I can’t have a baby. | 我不能生孩子 |
| [07:56] | No. You can’t have a baby. | 是的 你不能生孩子了 |
| [08:01] | Uh, great. | 呃 太好了 |
| [08:02] | Uh, well, I mean, um, not-not great. | 呃 我的意思是 也没那么好 |
| [08:07] | I mean, I’ve never wanted kids, | 我的意思是 我从来不想要孩子 |
| [08:08] | so if it has to happen to someone… | 所以要是发生在别人身上的 也没那么好 |
| [08:10] | Robin, is there anyone you can talk to about this? | 罗宾 你有可以倾诉这件事的对象吗 |
| [08:14] | Perhaps a close friend? | 也许一个好朋友 |
| [08:15] | I knew I could have talked to my friends. | 我知道我可以告诉我的朋友们 |
| [08:18] | But, it’s just, I already knew | 但是 只是我已经知道 |
| [08:20] | exactly how they would all react. | 他们每个人会有什么样的反应了 |
| [08:22] | Ted would go into overdrive trying to make me feel better. | 泰德会努力让我感觉好点 却会做有点过头 |
| [08:25] | You need comfort food. | 你得吃点好吃的 |
| [08:26] | Fried chicken, mac and cheese, mashed potatoes. | 炸鸡 芝士通心粉 土豆泥 |
| [08:28] | Open your present, I’ll work on these shoulders. | 开礼物吧 我来帮你揉揉肩 |
| [08:30] | Okay, just breathe, relax, eat your chicken. | 行了 深呼吸 放轻松 吃炸鸡 |
| [08:33] | Come on, eat, breathe, | 快点 吃啊 深呼吸 |
| [08:34] | open it, breathe, open it, eat. | 快打开 深呼吸 快打开 快点吃 |
| [08:37] | Robin, why are you so tense?! | 罗宾 你为神马会绷得那么紧 |
| [08:39] | Lily would just implode. | 莉莉则会彻底崩溃 |
| [08:41] | And here I’ve been going on and on about babies. | 我居然还一直在谈宝宝的事 |
| [08:45] | Oh, I am such a bad friend! | 喔 我真是一个不称职的朋友 |
| [08:51] | And I’d wind up comforting her. | 到头来 还得我去安抚她 |
| [08:53] | It’s okay. | 安啦安啦 |
| [08:54] | You have to punch me in the face! | 你应该朝着我的脸上来一拳 |
| [08:57] | Marshall would ask me a ton of questions | 马修则会问我一堆一堆的 |
| [08:59] | I don’t know the answers to. | 连我都不知该怎么回答的问题 |
| [09:01] | – Have you thought about adoption? – Um, well… | -你又没有想过领养 -唔 我还 |
| [09:03] | Does this kind of thing run in your family? | 你家能接受这事吗 |
| [09:05] | Uh… | 这个… |
| [09:06] | What was the date, duration | 你上次来大姨妈的时间 长度 |
| [09:07] | and consistency of your last period? | 还有稳定性如何 |
| [09:10] | And your father would bend over backwards | 然后你的老爹将会鞠躬尽瘁地 |
| [09:12] | trying to make me laugh. | 试着让我笑出来 |
| [09:14] | A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar– | 一个基督教牧师和一个犹太教祭司一起走进了一家酒吧 |
| [09:16] | no, a barbershop– no, a post office– | 啊不 是理发店 啊不 是家邮局 |
| [09:18] | no, it’s two priests– no, it’s two ducks– | 啊不对不对 是两个牧师 啊还是不对 是两只鸭子 |
| [09:21] | no, a priest holding a duck– and he’s Polish. | 记错了 是一个牧师手里拿着只鸭子 他是波兰人 |
| [09:23] | The priest, not the duck. | 是那个牧师 鸭子不是 |
| [09:24] | Actually, the duck could be Polish, too. | 实际上 那只鸭子也可以是波兰的哟 |
| [09:26] | Doesn’t matter. | 这点细节不要紧 |
| [09:27] | Yes it does. The duck’s not Polish. | 其实是还有问题的 那个鸭子不是波兰的 |
| [09:29] | And when that didn’t work, | 要是那样都没有用的话 |
| [09:30] | he would actually bend over backwards. | 他也就真的 死而后已 了 |
| [09:32] | Pratfall! | 平沙落雁 |
| [09:34] | Ow! | 嗷 |
| [09:36] | The bottom line is, I didn’t feel like talking about it. | 总之 我不想和他们说这事 |
| [09:39] | So when Ted asked… | 所以当泰德问起来的时候 |
| [09:41] | Hey, Robin, you okay? You look upset. | 嘿 罗宾 你没事吧 你好像不大开心啊 |
| [09:43] | I just came up with the first lie that popped into my head. | 我就说了一个在第一时间跳到我脑子里的谎 |
| [09:46] | Yeah. Uh… | 呃 没错 |
| [09:48] | I just found out I can never… | 我刚刚得知我以后再也不能 |
| [09:51] | be a pole-vaulter for the Canadian Olympic team. | 成为加拿大奥运队的撑杆跳选手了 |
| [09:55] | I’m too tall or something. | 或许是我太高了 或别的原因 |
| [09:57] | Robin, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Robin. | 罗宾 真抱歉 真的好可惜 罗宾 |
| [09:58] | I had no idea. That’s terrible. | 我无语了 这真是太糟了 |
| [09:59] | Can we get some fried chicken over here, stat! | 能不能给我们这里来份炸鸡啊 伙计 |
| [10:01] | I am such a bad friend! | 我这个朋友实在是太不称职了 |
| [10:04] | Three slutty nuns show up at St. Peter’s– | 三个淫荡的修女出现在了圣彼得 |
| [10:06] | Wait, wait, they’re not slutty. | 等等 她们不淫荡的 |
| [10:07] | Well, they are, but you’re not supposed to know that yet. | 唔 她们确实很淫荡 我提前剧透了 |
| [10:09] | Um… | 呃… |
| [10:10] | Hey, baby, what’s up? | 嘿 宝贝 怎么了 |
| [10:12] | Hey, uh, listen, the construction of | 嘿 呃 听着 |
| [10:14] | the Symphony of Illumination is taking | 建造霓虹交响曲的工时 |
| [10:16] | a little longer than I thought. | 要比预想的要长那么一点 |
| [10:17] | Good thing I have Scott here to help me. | 好在我叫了史考特来帮我 |
| [10:19] | Right, Scott? | 对不，史考特 |
| [10:20] | You betcha, Mr. E! | 当然啦 埃先生 |
| [10:22] | Bad news. | 坏消息 |
| [10:22] | Robin’s too tall | 罗宾因为太高 |
| [10:23] | to be an Olympic pole-vaulter. | 而不能成为奥运会撑杆跳运动员了 |
| [10:25] | Has she filed an appeal with the IOC? | 问问她有没有填国际奥委会的上诉表格 |
| [10:27] | Have you filed an appeal with the IOC? | 你有没有填国际奥委会的上诉表格 |
| [10:28] | Can she make herself shorter by slouching? | 问她能不能驼背让自个变矮点 |
| [10:30] | Can you make yourself shorter by slouching? | 你能不能驼背让自个变矮点 |
| [10:32] | Has she considered going back to school | 问她有没有考虑过重新回学校 |
| [10:33] | and competing at the collegiate level? | 然后参加大学组的比赛 |
| [10:34] | Have you considered going back to school and… | 你有没有考虑过重新回学校然后 |
| [10:36] | I don’t want to talk about it. | 我不想讨论这件事 |
| [10:38] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [10:39] | I love you, baby. See you tomorrow. | 爱你呦 亲爱的 明天见了 |
| [10:41] | Okay, I love you, too. | 好的 我也爱你 |
| [10:46] | Scott? | 史考特 |
| [10:47] | Scott, I dropped my phone. | 史考特 我的手机刚刚掉下去了 |
| [10:48] | Yep, found it. | 对 我找着了 |
| [10:50] | Could you bring it up here? | 你能拿上来啊 |
| [10:51] | You got it. | 好嘞 |
| [10:52] | Hey, while I’m at it, can I get you a beer? | 嘿 我上来的时候 我能给你带瓶啤酒不 |
| [10:55] | He wants to bring the old man a beer. | 他想帮老头子带瓶啤酒 |
| [10:58] | Yeah, sure. | 好啊 当然啦 |
| [10:59] | Uh, there’s a whole case in the fridge. | 唔 冰箱里有一整箱呢 |
| [11:01] | Thanks, son. | 谢了 儿子 |
| [11:02] | Do you, do you mind if I call you “Son”? | 你 你不介意我叫你儿子吧 |
| [11:05] | You can call me whatever you want… | 随便你怎么叫我 |
| [11:07] | jackass. | 二货 |
| [11:13] | Scott? | 史考特 |
| [11:14] | The ladder fell. | 梯子掉下去了 |
| [11:16] | Scott? | 史考特 |
| [11:32] | Scott! | 史考特 |
| [11:35] | What are we doing? | 你在干嘛 |
| [11:40] | Listen, um, | 听着 唔 |
| [11:42] | I know things have been kind of weird | 我知道这几个星期以来 |
| [11:44] | between you and me these past couple weeks, | 我们之间有点怪异 |
| [11:45] | so I just want to say I’m… | 所以我只想说 |
| [11:47] | I’m glad we’re back to where we started. | 很高兴我们又回到了我们开始的地方 |
| [11:48] | – Yeah. – Friends with benefits. | -嗯 -既是朋友又是炮友 |
| [11:50] | – No. – Just like always. | -不 -一直不都是这样的吗 |
| [11:51] | Never been that. Just friends. | 从来没有过 我们只是朋友 |
| [11:53] | With benefits. We’ll talk about it later. | 加炮友 我们可以晚点再说 |
| [11:55] | Look at all these babies. | 看看这些小宝宝们啊 |
| [11:58] | Isn’t it crazy how, now that we’re not having one, | 你说这事疯不疯狂 因为我们没宝宝了 |
| [12:00] | babies are cute again? | 他们又变得可爱了 |
| [12:02] | Look at that one. | 看那个 |
| [12:04] | I’m good. | 不用了 |
| [12:05] | No, I’m serious. Look, look. | 不 我说真的 看 看 |
| [12:06] | Damn it. | 该死 |
| [12:08] | That thing’s cute as crap. | 他像垃圾一样可爱 |
| [12:12] | Screw you, baby. | 去屎吧 小宝贝 |
| [12:15] | Scott? | 斯科特 |
| [12:17] | Scott! | 斯科特 |
| [12:18] | What is going on? | 怎么回事 |
| [12:20] | -Hey, Mr. E. -Scott… | -嘿 埃先生 -斯科特 |
| [12:22] | if you do not let me down, I am going to scream | 如果你不让我下去 我就要拼命乱叫 |
| [12:24] | my head off until someone comes to help me, | 直到有人来救我 |
| [12:26] | and then you’re going to have to explain all of this to the cops. | 到时你就要和警察解释这些事了 |
| [12:30] | And then you’ll have to explain why there’s | 到时候你就要解释为什么 |
| [12:31] | a picture of my ding-dong on your phone. | 你手机上会有我的小香肠的照片 |
| [12:34] | There is no picture of your… | 我手机上没有 |
| [12:35] | There is now. | 现在有了哟 |
| [12:38] | Oh, yeah, that’s a beauty. | 哦 真是漂亮极了 |
| [12:40] | Scott? | 斯科特 |
| [12:41] | Scott! | 斯科特 |
| [12:44] | Scott! | 斯科特 |
| [12:46] | Marshall keeps | 马修一直要我 |
| [12:47] | asking me to text him pictures of my boobies. | 发些我咪咪的照片过去 |
| [12:50] | After all these years, | 过了这么多年 |
| [12:52] | he sometimes still acts like a teenager. | 有时候他还是像个小青年 |
| [12:55] | I’ll be right back. | 一会回来 |
| [13:01] | Insane Duane. | 疯狂的杜安 |
| [13:04] | It’s Sane Duane now. | 现在是正常的杜安了 |
| [13:07] | You used to be magnificent. | 你曾经那么赞啊 |
| [13:18] | Are you okay? | 你还好吗 |
| [13:20] | Yeah, yeah, um, I guess this, um, | 还好 还好 我觉得 |
| [13:24] | this pole-vaulting thing is finally hitting me. | 撑杆跳这事 最终还是打击到我了 |
| [13:28] | I don’t get it, Robin. | 我不明白 罗宾 |
| [13:29] | Did you really want to be a pole-vaulter? | 你真的想做撑杆跳选手吗 |
| [13:31] | No, no, I was, uh, I was always | 不想 我 呃 我以前 |
| [13:35] | adamantly against having a… | 非常不想拥有 |
| [13:38] | uh, a pole-vaulting career, | 呃 撑杆跳生涯 |
| [13:40] | even though it’s what most women want. | 虽然这是大部分女人都想要的 |
| [13:42] | Most women want to be a pole-vaulter? | 大部分女人想要当撑杆跳选手 |
| [13:44] | In Canada– it’s very big up there. | 在加拿大 在那边很火的 |
| [13:46] | You know, it’s, it’s meet a nice guy, | 你懂的 认识一个不错的男人 |
| [13:48] | get married, vault some poles, | 结婚 把杆撑起来 |
| [13:51] | but I… | 但我 |
| [13:52] | never wanted that. | 一直不想那样 |
| [13:55] | Of course, it’s one thing not to want something. | 当然 不想要是一回事 |
| [13:57] | It’s another to be told you can’t have it. | 不能要又是另一回事 |
| [14:01] | I guess it’s, it’s just nice knowing | 要是有一天你想法变了 |
| [14:03] | that you could someday do it if you changed your mind. | 想要就能要该多好啊 |
| [14:09] | But now, all of a sudden, that door is closed. | 但是现在 突然间 那个想法就破灭了 |
| [14:15] | What about the one where you ski and shoot at the same time? | 试试一边滑雪一边射击怎么样? |
| [14:19] | That seems like something you’d be good at. | 你似乎很擅长那个哦 |
| [14:23] | Oh, my God, Robin, look at this. | 噢天哪 罗宾 看这个 |
| [14:25] | O Cana-dorable! | 多么可爱的加拿大宝宝衣！ |
| [14:27] | Am I right? | 对吧 |
| [14:28] | Excuse me. | 对不起 |
| [14:30] | Yep, this works. | 哇哦 这个真好用 |
| [14:37] | 史考特 | |
| [14:39] | when I get down from here, you are going | 等我下来之后 |
| [14:40] | to be in big, big trouble, mister. | 你就有大麻烦了 小子 |
| [14:43] | Come on, Mr. E. | 拜托 埃先生 |
| [14:44] | Didn’t you ever cut loose when you were a kid? | 你年轻的时候难道没放纵过么 |
| [14:47] | That’s irrelevant. | 那是两码事 |
| [14:49] | I mean, of course I did. | 我是说 我当然放纵过 |
| [14:51] | One time, when my parents were out of town, | 有一回 我爸妈出城了 |
| [14:54] | my brothers and I set the basement on fire | 我和我兄弟把地窖烧了 |
| [14:58] | hosting an amateur wrestling exhibition. | 办了个业余摔跤表演赛 |
| [15:02] | There were some theatrics. | 还有些戏剧效果在里面 |
| [15:04] | See, you get me. | 看 你懂我的意思 |
| [15:07] | I don’t think of you as some dummy I trapped on the roof. | 我不觉得你像某些被我困在屋顶的呆瓜 |
| [15:10] | I think of you more like, like my dad. | 我觉得你更像 我的父亲 |
| [15:16] | Can we keep the party going for 30 more minutes, please? | 我们的派对能再开半小时么 |
| [15:22] | Okay, Scott. | 好吧 斯科特 |
| [15:24] | Thanks, Pop. | 多谢 哥们 |
| [15:29] | It’s fine, kid just needed to blow off some steam. | 没关系 孩子们只是需要发泄一下 |
| [15:40] | No! | 不 |
| [15:41] | Grandma Gunderson knitted that! | 那可是冈德森奶奶织的 |
| [15:44] | Scott…! | 史考特 |
| [15:48] | That was crazy. | 这太疯狂了 |
| [15:49] | She just ran out of there crying. | 她哭着跑出去了 |
| [15:51] | Now she’s not answering her phone. | 现在连电话也不接 |
| [15:53] | She’s been acting really weird for a few weeks now, | 这几周她真的很奇怪 |
| [15:56] | really since the night we discussed the hurricane. | 从我们讨论飓风那天晚上开始 |
| [16:00] | Barney, you split a cab home. | 巴尼 你们一起搭车回家的 |
| [16:01] | Did she say anything? | 她说了些什么吗 |
| [16:06] | We didn’t really talk much. | 我们没怎么聊 |
| [16:08] | Well, lucky for us, | 好吧 幸运的是 |
| [16:09] | someone at this table is skilled | 这里有人非常擅长 |
| [16:12] | in the art of detection. | 侦查的艺术哟 |
| [16:15] | Robin’s upset. | 罗宾不开心 |
| [16:17] | She and Kevin are having trouble. | 她和凯文有问题了 |
| [16:20] | – He cheated on her. -No way. | -他背叛了她 -不可能 |
| [16:22] | Kevin’s an honest, decent guy who never on his best day | 凯文是个诚实正派的人 他没那么幸运 |
| [16:25] | could pull a hotter chick than Robin. | 可以勾搭上一个比罗宾更辣的美女 |
| [16:27] | Maybe Robin cheated on him. | 那也许是罗宾背叛了他 |
| [16:29] | Maybe Robin is the dirty bird who slept with someone else. | 也许罗宾才是跟别人上床的贱人 |
| [16:33] | I don’t know, this pole-vaulting thing seems | 我不知道 撑杆跳这事 |
| [16:35] | like a slam dunk to me. | 感觉有点像灌篮啊 |
| [16:37] | Oh, it is so obvious. | 噢 这太明显了 |
| [16:39] | Barney. | 巴尼 |
| [16:41] | What is the name of that guy | 那个跟你一起工作的人 |
| [16:43] | you worked with– uh, Randy? | 叫什么名字 呃 兰迪 |
| [16:44] | It was Randy. | 原来是跟兰迪 |
| [16:45] | Wait a second. | 等一下 |
| [16:46] | I just cracked this case. | 我已经破了这个案子了 |
| [16:50] | The little maple leaf onesie. | 就是那个枫叶婴儿服 |
| [16:51] | It made her homesick. | 让她想家了 |
| [16:53] | That’s why she’s so upset. | 那到底是什么让她不开心呢 |
| [16:54] | She’s not going home for Christmas. | 她不准备回家过圣诞 |
| [16:55] | She wants me to invite her to Ohio. | 难道她想让我邀请她去我老家吗 |
| [16:58] | That’s got to be it! | 肯定是因为这个 |
| [17:00] | Either that or she slept with Barney. | 或者是她又跟巴尼一起滚床单了 |
| [17:15] | Oh, you must be Scott. | 噢 你肯定是史考特 |
| [17:17] | Oh, hello, ma’am. | 喔 你好 太太 |
| [17:20] | It’s nice to finally see your face. | 见到您真荣幸 |
| [17:22] | Well, I’d better go hit those books. | 那么 我最好去啃书本了 |
| [17:25] | Hold it right there, young man. | 年轻人 等一下 |
| [17:29] | This is for helping out my husband. | 这是一点心意 谢谢你帮了我老公 |
| [17:32] | Wow, 50 bucks. | 哇噢 五十刀 |
| [17:35] | Merry Christmas. | 圣诞快乐 |
| [17:45] | Lily! | 莉莉 |
| [17:48] | An airplane ticket to Cleveland? | 一张去克利夫兰的机票吗 |
| [17:50] | I know it’s not Canada, but it starts with a “C” | 我知道这不是加拿大 但也相差不了多少(注:克利夫兰和加拿大首字母均为C) |
| [17:52] | and it’s cold as balls, so get packed. | 而且冷得都能缩成球了 赶紧打包吧 |
| [17:55] | You’re coming home with me for Christmas. | 你跟我一起回家过圣诞吧 |
| [17:56] | Yeah, nice try, dude. | 老兄 想得美 |
| [17:58] | I wouldn’t go to Cleveland | 我可不会去六年来付了一亿二千五百万工资 |
| [17:59] | for $125 million paid over six years. | 给某人的克利夫兰 |
| [18:03] | Still? | 还继续啊 |
| [18:04] | Still with the LeBron jokes? | 还要笑勒布朗吗（NBA球星 为拿总冠军离开克利夫兰队结果未能如愿 ) |
| [18:05] | Where’s that ring, huh? | 那总冠军戒指到底在哪 啊 |
| [18:07] | Where’s that ring he’s supposed to have by now? | 那个本该拥有的戒指现在在哪 |
| [18:09] | Look, I just– I thought you were bummed | 听着 我只是 我觉得你不开心 |
| [18:11] | about not going home for Christmas. | 因为你不能回家过圣诞 |
| [18:13] | Are you kidding? | 你在开玩笑么 |
| [18:14] | I love New York at Christmas. | 我喜欢在纽约过圣诞 |
| [18:16] | It’s so quiet and peaceful. | 这里安静又祥和 |
| [18:20] | Got my eggnog to keep me company, so… | 还有鸡蛋酒陪着我 所以 |
| [18:22] | Robin, what’s wrong? | 罗宾 怎么了 |
| [18:24] | – Nothing. – Just tell me. | 没事 跟我说说吧 |
| [18:26] | Why do you need to know so bad? | 你怎么非想要知道啊 |
| [18:28] | So I can cheer you up. | 这样我好让你开心起来 |
| [18:29] | It’s not your job to cheer me up. | 让我开心这并不是你的工作 |
| [18:31] | Yes, it is. | 是的 一直都是 |
| [18:32] | Cheering you up is my job. | 让你开心是我的职责所在 |
| [18:34] | Well, then, you’re fired. | 好吧 那你被炒了 |
| [18:36] | You can’t fire me. | 你不能开除我 |
| [18:37] | I’m union, bitch. | 我是工会的 贱人 |
| [18:38] | It’s not your job to cheer me up. | 这不是你该做的事 |
| [18:39] | – Yes, it is. – No, it’s not. | -是的 本来就是 -这不是 |
| [18:40] | Yes, it is. | 一直都是 |
| [18:41] | No, it’s not. | 一直都不是 |
| [18:45] | Merry Christmas, Ted. | 圣诞快乐 泰德 |
| [18:48] | Merry Christmas. | 圣诞快乐 |
| [18:53] | So, kids, I settled in for a Christmas alone. | 就这样 孩子们 最后我独自一人过了圣诞节 |
| [18:57] | I appreciated that Ted wanted to cheer me up, | 我十分感激 泰德想要让我开心起来 |
| [19:00] | but honestly, it wasn’t necessary. | 不过说实话 其实没有必要 |
| [19:03] | So I can’t have kids. | 所以我不能有自己的孩子 |
| [19:05] | Big deal. | 非常大的代价 |
| [19:07] | This way there’s no one to hold me back in life, | 在这一刻 没有人能把我拉回生活的原路上去 |
| [19:09] | no one to keep me from traveling | 没有一个人能把我从游荡的途中拉回来 |
| [19:11] | where I want to travel, | 当那时的我只想在街头游荡 |
| [19:12] | no one getting in the way of my career. | 没人能在我的职业生涯上碍事 |
| [19:14] | If you want to know the truth of it, | 如果你们想要知道真相的话 |
| [19:17] | I’m glad you guys aren’t real. | 我很感激的是 你们并不是真实的 |
| [19:33] | Really glad. | 非常感激 |
| [19:53] | Damn it. | 靠 |
| [20:08] | Yes, it is. | 是的 这是我的工作 |
| [20:12] | Look, you don’t want to tell me what’s wrong, fine. | 听着 如果你不想告诉我哪里出了岔子 也行 |
| [20:15] | I don’t need to know. | 我也没必要知道 |
| [20:18] | But you can never stop me from trying to cheer you up. | 但你不能阻止我逗你开心 |
| [20:22] | It’s a fact of life. | 这就是生活 |
| [20:23] | You’re just gonna have to deal with it. | 你只能学着去接受它 |
| [20:25] | Ted… | 泰德 |
| [20:26] | Hold on, hold on, this is the best part. | 等等 这可是最精彩的地方 |
| [20:27] | I’m on the highway to hell | 我在通往地狱的高速公路上 |
| [20:43] | Kids, your Aunt Robin never became a pole-vaulter, | 孩子们 罗宾阿姨没能成为一个撑竿跳选手 |
| [20:46] | but she did become a famous journalist, | 但是她却成为了一个有名的记者 |
| [20:48] | a successful businesswoman, a world traveler. | 一个成功的生意人 以及一个周游世界的旅行者 |
| [20:51] | She was even briefly a bullfighter– | 她还当过一阵子的斗牛士 |
| [20:53] | that’s a funny story, I’ll get to that one later. | 这是个有趣的故事 以后我会慢慢讲给你们听 |
| [20:55] | But there’s one thing your Aunt Robin never was. | 但是有一样东西 你们的罗宾阿姨从来没有缺少过 |
| [20:59] | She was never alone. | 她从来就不是一个人 |