| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Kids,on New Year’s Day 2012, | 孩子们 在2012年的第一天 |
| [00:02] | Uncle Marshall took a trip to Minnesota | 马修叔叔去了一趟明尼苏达 |
| [00:04] | to see someone he truly missed. | 去看望一个他真心想念的人 |
| [00:11] | Hey, Pop. | 嘿 老爸 |
| [00:14] | I can’t believe it’s been a year. | 不敢相信一年就这么过去了 |
| [00:16] | I think the most appropriate way | 我认为追忆关于你那美好的回忆 |
| [00:19] | to honor your memory today… | 最合适的方式 |
| [00:22] | is to get blasted | 就是颓废下来 |
| [00:23] | and watch the Vikings make the Bears | 看着维京队把熊队 |
| [00:25] | their furry little bitches. | 虐的不成样 |
| [00:26] | Go, Vikes! MOURNER: Shh. | 走着 维京人 嘘 |
| [00:28] | Sorry for your loss. | 不好意思了 |
| [00:30] | Which is what we’ll be saying to the Bears | 老爸 我们在大概三个小时的时间里 |
| [00:33] | in about three hours, right, Pop? | 该对熊队说些什么呢 |
| [00:34] | Kids, tailgating at the Vikings-Bears game | 孩子们 狂热地观看维京对阵熊队的比赛 |
| [00:37] | was a tradition for Uncle Marshall and his dad. | 是马修叔叔和他爸爸的传统 |
| [00:40] | That’s how the government | 这就是政府如何 |
| [00:41] | covered up the UFO crash in Roswell: | 掩盖罗斯威尔UFO坠毁事件的 |
| [00:44] | by canning the sliced up alien carcasses | 把切成片的外星人尸体装成罐 |
| [00:47] | and calling it Spam. | 称之为猪肉罐头 |
| [00:50] | A.K.A, Sliced Processed Alien Meat | 也就是”外星肉类切片加工” |
| [00:54] | Wow. | 哇 |
| [00:56] | Is there anything you don’t know, Dad? | 世界上还有你不知道的事儿吗 爸 |
| [00:58] | No. | 没有 |
| [00:59] | I know most stuff. | 我知道绝大多数的事情 |
| [01:01] | And in your honor… | 对您来说 |
| [01:03] | three decades of pork fat, lighter fluid and Bengay. | 三十年的猪肉脂肪 打火机油和奔肌 |
| [01:09] | Dear God, that’s the stuff. | 额滴神呀 就是这个味儿 |
| [01:11] | So much to catch you up on. | 这么多可以让我追寻你的 |
| [01:14] | So, last night was New Year’s Eve. | 昨晚是新年夜 |
| [01:17] | That’s a crazy story. | 这是一个疯狂的故事 |
| [01:19] | So you haven’t told your dad that you’re pregnant yet? | 你还没告诉你爸爸你已经怀孕了么 |
| [01:21] | No. But why should I? | 没呢 不过我为什么要说呢 |
| [01:24] | My dad has never been there for me. | 我爸爸从来都不关心我 |
| [01:26] | This is just another chance for him to let me down. | 这只会让我再一次的对他失望 |
| [01:28] | Lily, you have to tell him. | 莉莉 你得告诉他 |
| [01:31] | He’s at some board game convention in Chicago. | 他在芝加哥的一个桌游大会上 |
| [01:34] | He’s your dad. | 他是你爸爸 |
| [01:37] | I don’t see why people aren’t getting this. | 我不知道为什么人们不明白 |
| [01:39] | Shoplifter does not promote crime. | 商店扒手游戏不推崇犯罪 |
| [01:40] | It celebrates it. | 这是庆祝这个的 |
| [01:43] | Excuse me. | 不好意思 |
| [01:44] | Yeah. | 谁 |
| [01:46] | Hey, Dad. | 嘿 爸爸 |
| [01:47] | I’m, uh, calling with some pretty big news. | 我 呃 打电话是想告诉你一件大事 |
| [01:51] | I’m pregnant. | 我怀孕了 |
| [01:53] | Great. Thanks. | 很好 谢谢 |
| [01:57] | 老爸老妈浪漫史 | |
| [02:01] | 祝大家新年快乐 | |
| [02:10] | Anyway, Dad, Ted and Barney’s New Year’s Eve | 不管怎样 爸爸 泰德和巴尼的新年夜 |
| [02:12] | wasn’t off to a great start, either. | 开始并不顺利 |
| [02:14] | Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It’s 50 bucks, | 嘿 别走 别走 入场费50美元 |
| [02:16] | and the line starts out there. | 外面排队去 |
| [02:17] | Uh, we’re regulars. Oh, in that case, | 额 我们是常客 噢 这样的话 |
| [02:19] | the line starts out there, and it’s 50 bucks. | 外面排队去 入场费50美元 |
| [02:21] | You got a problem with that? | 你有什么问题么 |
| [02:23] | Kids, here’s why we didn’t have a problem with that. | 孩子们 这就是我们为什么没有继续纠缠下去 |
| [02:27] | And he was even scarier without the toupee. | 他没戴假发看起来更可怕了 |
| [02:30] | No problem. It’s a little drafty. | 没问题 外面小风吹着挺好的 |
| [02:31] | We’ll get you a nice hot cocoa. | 我们给您带一杯可可热饮 |
| [02:36] | Check it out. | 你看看这个 |
| [02:38] | Sandy Rivers’ New Year’s Eve show. | 桑迪里弗斯的新年夜节目 |
| [02:40] | Thank God I don’t have to produce | 谢天谢地我不用做 |
| [02:43] | this frozen pile of poo. | 这个屎成冰坨子一般的破节目 |
| [02:44] | How’d you dodge that bullet? | 你怎么没做这个节目 |
| [02:45] | Well, maybe Tina, the producer, she, uh, picked, | 呃 也许蒂娜 制片人 她就 |
| [02:48] | is more talented than I am… | 四脚朝天躺着等着桑迪在她身上乱搞的时候 |
| [02:50] | at lying down while Sandy does his business on her. | 决定选一个更有天赋的人吧 |
| [02:53] | Does it bother you that this pervert’s | 让这个变态做直播 |
| [02:55] | on the air, and you’re not anymore? | 不会烦你么 好像你也不在意这个了 |
| [02:56] | Do you miss it? | 你怀念吗 |
| [02:59] | What? Why would… why would I miss it? | 什么 为啥 为啥我要怀念呢 |
| [03:02] | No. I would rather | 不 我宁愿 |
| [03:04] | be warm and cozy here in denial– my apartment. | 在我的公寓里暖和又舒服的待着 |
| [03:07] | Robin, I’m no therapist– | 罗宾 我不是心理医生 |
| [03:09] | wait, yes, I am– | 等等 是 我是 |
| [03:11] | but I’ve got a New Year’s resolution for you. | 但是我对你有个新年祝愿 |
| [03:14] | Get back on camera. | 回到荧幕上去 |
| [03:15] | Mine was going to be “Make a sex tape,” So… two birds. | 我的愿望是拍一部”小制作A片” 这样就正好一举两得喽 |
| [03:20] | Hold that thought. | 你继续想 |
| [03:22] | Hello? | 你好 |
| [03:23] | Sandy? | 桑迪 |
| [03:25] | Tina quit. | 蒂娜跟我分了 |
| [03:26] | The woman I love just quit. | 我爱的那个女人跟我分了 |
| [03:29] | Love? She’s my everything, Robin. | 爱 她是我的全部 罗宾 |
| [03:31] | My sun, my stars, my oxygen. | 我的太阳 我的星星 我的氧气 |
| [03:34] | Plus, she likes it fast and dirty, | 补充一下 她喜欢更快更淫乱 |
| [03:37] | and that’s how Sandy rides. | 这就是我桑迪的作风 |
| [03:39] | I need you here ASAP. | 我需要你尽快过来 |
| [03:41] | Are you kidding me? | 你开玩笑么 |
| [03:42] | Marcus? | 马库斯 |
| [03:44] | What the heck are you doing here? | 你丫在这干嘛呢 |
| [03:45] | What the heck are you doing here? | 你丫又在这干嘛呢 |
| [03:47] | I wanted to see Dad today– in private. | 我今天想来看看爸爸 私下的 |
| [03:51] | Well, I had the same idea, | 好吧 我有同样的想法 |
| [03:52] | and I drove all the way from Mom’s, so get lost. | 我一路从妈妈那开车过来 所以你滚蛋吧 |
| [03:55] | I flew here, so you get lost. | 我是飞过来的 所以你滚蛋吧 |
| [03:58] | Um, I’m trying to have a poignant moment | 呃 我试着跟我们已经逝去的爸爸 |
| [04:00] | with our departed father, turd face. | 度过一段感人至深的时光 便便脸 |
| [04:03] | Well, I’m trying to feel Dad’s spirit | 好吧 我试着感受爸爸的意志 |
| [04:05] | flow through my soul,butt breath. | 轻拂我的灵魂 屁股头 |
| [04:07] | I’m reaching out to the beyond | 我伸出双手 到达远方 |
| [04:09] | to touch Dad’s inner light, ass clown. | 触碰爸爸的内心之光 你个丑屁股 |
| [04:12] | I hear Dad’s voice like an ethereal song | 我听见爸爸的声音 犹如圣歌 |
| [04:15] | guiding me toward salvation, douche nozzle. | 指引我得到救赎 你个喷粪的傻逼 |
| [04:19] | – Dibs on Dad. – Dibs on Dad times infinity. | -爸爸归我 -爸爸归我 正无穷 |
| [04:21] | Oh! Ooh. | 嗷 唔 |
| [04:23] | I’ll just pretend like you’re not here. | 我就当你根本不存在 |
| [04:26] | What? | 什么 |
| [04:27] | Dad, do you hear something? | 爸爸 你听见没 |
| [04:29] | Perhaps the high-pitched whine of someone who wet their bed | 貌似是某个11岁还在尿床的家伙 |
| [04:33] | until they were 11! | 那娘娘腔的哭嚎声 |
| [04:35] | Ten. | 是10岁了啦 |
| [04:37] | Anyway, Dad, since it’s just the two of us… | 无论如何 爸爸 既然这就只有咱俩 |
| [04:43] | Lily and I were going to spend New Year’s | 我告诉你 莉莉和我在新年这天 |
| [04:45] | unpacking the baby room. | 布置育婴房 |
| [04:46] | Um, sweetie, why is this book in here? | 额 亲爱的 这书是怎么回事 |
| [04:49] | That’s Enigmas of The Mystical. | 那是谜团团 |
| [04:51] | It’s all about mysterious | 是讲神奇的 |
| [04:52] | and unexplained phenomena. | 无法解释的各种现象 |
| [04:54] | Don’t you remember the TV commercials from the ’80s? | 你不记得八十年代那个电视广告了么 |
| [04:56] | June 17th, 1983. | 1983年6月17日 |
| [04:59] | Tempe, Arizona. | 亚利桑那州 坦佩 |
| [05:00] | A woman makes a chicken salad sandwich. | 一个妇女做了一个鸡肉三明治 |
| [05:03] | EERIE WHISPERING: Chicken salad sandwich. | 鸡肉三明治 |
| [05:05] | Halfway across the country in Michigan, | 而在横跨了半个国家的密歇根 |
| [05:06] | her daughter is compelled to make | 她的女儿心念所使般做了 |
| [05:08] | almost exactly the same sandwich. | 一个几乎一模一样的三明治 |
| [05:11] | EERIE WHISPERING: Tuna salad. | 诡异的低语声:金枪鱼沙拉 |
| [05:12] | Coincidence? | 这是巧合么 |
| [05:14] | Or an enigma of the mystical! | 还是一个神秘的谜团团！ |
| [05:18] | Yeah, those enigmas always seemed a bit thin to me. | 啊 那些谜什么的对我来说总是有点薄 |
| [05:22] | Thin? Lily, this is 200 pages | 薄? 莉莉 这可是200页 |
| [05:25] | of detailed accounts about Bigfoot, ghosts, | 详细讲述了大脚怪啊 幽灵啊 |
| [05:29] | aliens abducting people from their beds and probing them. | 还有外星人把人类从被窝里绑架走 来探测他们 |
| [05:31] | I’m going to read it to Baby Eriksen | 我决定了 我给咱宝宝读这个吧 |
| [05:33] | at night-night. | 就当睡前小故事 |
| [05:34] | You really want to read our kid | 你真打算在睡前 |
| [05:36] | bedtime stories about monsters? | 给咱宝宝读怪物的故事么 |
| [05:37] | First of all, I wouldn’t use the “M” Word. | 第一 我不会用’怪物’这个术语 |
| [05:39] | Only they can call themselves that. | 除非怪物们自我介绍来着 |
| [05:40] | And secondly, are you really saying | 第二 你真决定 |
| [05:42] | you don’t want to raise our child as a believer? | 把我们的宝宝教成个无神论者么 |
| [05:44] | I don’t want to brainwash our child | 我可不想给宝宝洗脑 |
| [05:46] | to believe in something with no proof. | 让它相信些没证据的东西 |
| [05:48] | It’s not about proof; it’s about faith. | 这跟证据神马的没关系 这是关乎信仰的 |
| [05:50] | Faith is what gives life shape and meaning. | 信仰 赋予生活形态与意义 |
| [05:52] | I mean, if there aren’t yetis or leprechauns, | 我是说 如果没有雪人和矮妖 |
| [05:54] | what’s the point of even getting up in the morning? | 早上起床还有什么意义呢 |
| [05:56] | I don’t know. | 我不晓得 |
| [05:57] | Wife, unborn child, drop a deuce? | 可能是老婆 未出世的孩儿 还有拉场痛快的粑粑 |
| [06:00] | Lily, don’t you think it’s a bit narcissistic | 莉莉 你不相信世上有比我们更强大的东西 |
| [06:03] | not to allow for something bigger than us out there? | 这不是有点自恋么 |
| [06:07] | Something whose beauty and power | 你不觉得 有些东西 他们的美丽 力量和威严 |
| [06:09] | and majesty humbles us? | 会让我们森森的颤抖么 |
| [06:11] | -God? -Werewolves. | -比如上帝 -比如狼人 |
| [06:16] | So, as the countdown to 212 continues, | 在我们倒数2012的时候 |
| [06:19] | a quick warning, America: | 我要给美利坚一个紧急警告 |
| [06:20] | Tina Henderson is a soulless bitch | 蒂娜-亨德森是个没有灵魂的婊子 |
| [06:23] | who will stomp on your heart. | 她会无情的践踏你的心 |
| [06:26] | I need you back, Tina. | 蒂娜 你快回来 |
| [06:29] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [06:31] | Well, if that’s as bad as it gets, we might be okay. | 好吧 要是这样就叫坏的不能再坏了 我看我们还不错呢 |
| [06:33] | Bathroom break. | 厕厕时间 |
| [06:38] | Oh, good. | 哦 绝了 |
| [06:39] | It’s on the Jumbotron. | 现场直播了 |
| [06:41] | Oh, finally. | 好了 |
| [06:43] | Yeah, that’ll be 100 bucks each. | 每人一百块 |
| [06:44] | What? You said 50. | 啥? 你说五十来着 |
| [06:46] | That was before the place got crowded. | 那是淡季价格 |
| [06:48] | Okay? It’s New Year’s Eve. | 知道不 现在是新年啦 |
| [06:49] | People get rowdy and break stuff. | 人山人海 东西乱碎 |
| [06:51] | The cover protects us. | 这样的掩护会保护咱们 |
| [06:52] | Plus, you get these festive hats. | 另外 给你们些节日帽 |
| [06:54] | For an additional 15 bucks. | 额外加15块钱 |
| [06:56] | They’re wet. | 这是湿的 |
| [06:58] | Dry ones are 20. | 干爽的要20块哦亲 |
| [07:00] | That’s it. | 够了 |
| [07:01] | Don’t bother, everybody. | 别费心了 各位 |
| [07:03] | MacLaren’s is a rip-off! | 麦克莱伦简直是明抢 |
| [07:04] | You’d all be better off | 大家最好 |
| [07:06] | coming upstairs to my place for a beer. | 上楼去我那喝酒去 |
| [07:08] | Hey, dude. You serious? | 嘿伙计 说真的么 |
| [07:11] | Ted, do you remember a couple yea ago, | 泰德 你还记得几年前不 |
| [07:15] | we had the best idea of a time? | 那时我们有个宏伟的志向 |
| [07:18] | We should buy a bar. | 我们应该买个酒吧 |
| [07:20] | Of course! We could buy a bar! | 必须的 我们应该买个酒吧 |
| [07:22] | The name of our bar? | 啥名字呢 |
| [07:24] | Puzzles. | 你猜 |
| [07:26] | People will be like, “Why is it called Puzzles?” | 别人就会问了”为啥叫你猜?” |
| [07:29] | That’s the puzzle. | 我们就说”你猜” |
| [07:31] | A bar where no one’s overcharged, | 我们的酒吧 价格低廉 |
| [07:34] | where everyone feels valued and respected. | 互相尊重 充满和谐 |
| [07:37] | A bar… | 我们的酒吧… |
| [07:39] | where we get chicks drunk and bang them. | 美女遍地 任人宰割 |
| [07:42] | We’re opening Puzzles tonight. | 今晚你猜就开张啦！ |
| [07:44] | Of course we’re opening Puzzles tonight! | 今晚我们绝对要开张！ |
| [07:47] | Aren’t you going to ask us why it’s called Puzzles? | 你不问问它为啥叫你猜么 |
| [07:50] | Nope. | 不鸟 |
| [07:52] | Okay. | 成 |
| [07:54] | Okay, we’re back live in 30 seconds. | 好 直播倒计时30秒 |
| [07:57] | – Where’s Sandy? – I don’t know. | 桑迪死哪儿去了 不知道啊 |
| [07:59] | Uht’s see if he’s still wearing his mic. | 那么咱们看看他是否还戴着麦 |
| [08:02] | Taxi, take me to Tina’s house. | 的哥 带我去蒂娜家 |
| [08:04] | 50 West 67th. | 67西街50号 |
| [08:06] | Sir, this is a falafel stand, | 先森 这里是一家沙拉三明治小店 |
| [08:07] | and you’re sitting in the hummu | 而且你坐在了一堆豆沙上 |
| [08:10] | Okay. | 这样吧 |
| [08:11] | Run the montage of people who died this year until I get back. | 在姐回来前放一下今年逝世人物大盘点的剪辑 |
| [08:14] | And add Sandy, | 叫一下桑迪 |
| [08:15] | because when I find him, I’m going to kill him. | 等我找着他 看我不宰了他 |
| [08:26] | – Anyway, Dad… – Stop hogging Dad already. | -不管怎么说 老爸 -别再独占老爸一人了 |
| [08:29] | – I’ve got stuff to tell him, too. – Like what? | -我也有东西要告诉他 -你要说啥呢 |
| [08:31] | You’re still living with Mom, and you have no job. | 说你现在还啃着老 当无业游民 |
| [08:34] | Go ahead. | 败给你了 |
| [08:35] | So, anyway… | 好 不管怎样 |
| [08:38] | July 8, 1972 . | 1972年 7月8号 |
| [08:41] | Cheyenne, Wyoming. | 怀俄明州 夏延河 |
| [08:42] | A hunter spots a hairy form in the fore. | 一个猎人发现他面前有一个毛茸茸的东西 |
| [08:45] | Bigfoot. | 大脚怪 |
| [08:46] | His story is dismissed | 他的故事被驳回 |
| [08:47] | because, to be honest, he’d been drinking | 因为 说实话他喝多了 |
| [08:50] | and had a history of mental problems. | 而且有精神病史 |
| [08:52] | But was it a hoax? | 但这真是一个骗局吗 |
| [08:54] | Or was it an enigma of the… | 或者这是一个谜… |
| [08:56] | It was an idiot in a gorilla suit. | 这是个穿着猩猩cosplay的二逼青年 |
| [08:59] | Enigma. Gorilla suit. | 奇迹 猩猩装 |
| [09:00] | Enigma! Gorilla suit! | 谜题啊 猩猩装而已 |
| [09:04] | Marshall? Marcus? | 马修 马可斯 |
| [09:05] | What are you guys doing here? | 你们在这里干神马 |
| [09:07] | Having a private moment with Dad. | 跟老爸单独相处一会儿 |
| [09:09] | No, I’m having a private moment with Dad. | 才不是 是我要和老爸单独呆一会儿 |
| [09:13] | No, I’m having a private moment with Dad. | 都散了 我才可以和老爸有一点时间独处 |
| [09:16] | Touchdown, Vikings! | 维京队 达阵了 |
| [09:17] | Boom! Yeah! | 洒家这辈子值了 |
| [09:25] | Anyway, Dad, | 算了 老爸 |
| [09:27] | since it’s still just the two of us, | 既然现在还是我们的二人世界 |
| [09:30] | I’ll go on. | 我接着说 |
| [09:35] | I’ve always envisioned Puzzles as a literary salon, | 我一直想象你猜酒吧应该是个无数来自扭腰客的 |
| [09:39] | where Gotham’s intelligentsia hold court | 文艺青年们慕名而来的文化沙龙 |
| [09:41] | on art, philosophy and literature. | 谈论艺术 哲学 还有文学 |
| [09:43] | Great. | 可以的 |
| [09:45] | And while you’re distracting the nerds and fatties, | 而且当你支开那些宅腐肥妞时 |
| [09:48] | I’ll be in the VIP room getting it in. | 我将在这个贵宾房一本满足了 |
| [09:50] | Uh, yeah, dude, I don’t know | 唔 那个 哥们 我不知道 |
| [09:52] | where you got a velvet rope, but you can’t | 你从哪里搞来了绒索栏 可你总不能 |
| [09:55] | use my room for anonymous sex. | 在我的房间里和陌生人翻云覆雨吧 |
| [09:57] | I’m kind of a neat freak that way. | 我有点洁癖的啦 |
| [09:59] | Hey, guys, I have an idea for Puzzles. | 嘿 筒子们 我有个好主意 |
| [10:01] | What if… What? | 如果…..这样呢 |
| [10:04] | Puzzle is kind of a shared envision | 你猜是只有我们两人才… |
| [10:07] | Oh. Okay. I understand. | 哦 好吧 我懂得 |
| [10:09] | But he we like your energy. | 不过我们看好你的干劲啊 |
| [10:10] | How would you like to be our star bartender. | 要不你就做我们的首席酒保吧 |
| [10:13] | I’ve always wanted to be a bartender. | 我一直就想要当个酒保了 |
| [10:14] | It’s just like being a therapist. | 这就像心理咨询师一样 |
| [10:16] | You listen to people’s problems, pretend to care, | 你聆听别人的问题 假装很关心 |
| [10:17] | but you can drink openly, | 但你就可以敞开喝了 |
| [10:19] | instead of having to hide your booze in a coffee mug. | 不用掖掖藏藏的把酒放在咖啡杯里喝 |
| [10:21] | Great. Oh, check it out. | 不错 对了 听听看 |
| [10:22] | We worked out a theme song for Puzzles. | 我们为你猜吧搞了首主题曲 |
| [10:25] | While I was carrying 100-pound kegs | 而我扛着100磅的小酒桶 |
| [10:26] | up four flights of stairs? Awesome. | 走4段楼梯 爽 |
| [10:33] | Puzzles is a place where people go | 如果你来你猜酒吧 |
| [10:37] | To feel like they belong | 这里就是你的家 |
| [10:40] | Gonna take advantage of dumb drunk girls No, we’re not. – Bro | 妹纸只要一醉我就啪啪啪 我们不会这样的 哥们儿 |
| [10:44] | That would be a place | 这是不对的啊 |
| [10:47] | where wit and wisdom bloom | 风趣智慧在这里开花 |
| [10:53] | place to bang chicks in Ted’s room | 泰德房间摘掉你的花 |
| [10:56] | Not gonna happen. We’ll talk about it. | 不可能发生 我们得谈谈 |
| [10:59] | At Puzzles, we all fit together | 你猜吧 大家是一家 |
| [11:03] | And I’m the bartender! | 酒保仅此一位 |
| [11:08] | I’ll go get the other kegs. | 我去多搬点酒桶 |
| [11:09] | Probably a good idea. | 这才是好主意 |
| [11:10] | We got to work out some harmonies. | 我们得和声一下 |
| [11:11] | And I’m right here No, you actually down here | 我在这里啦 不 你其实在下面啊 |
| [11:14] | Excuse me, sir? About the TVs, | 不好意思啊 这个电视机 |
| [11:18] | we in the middle burying my aunt, so… | 我们现在在下葬我的姨妈 |
| [11:21] | No, I just want to check out the score. | 不用 我只是想来看一下比分如何 |
| [11:23] | Actually, I’m trying to have | 事实上 我尽量想和 |
| [11:26] | a private moment with my dad, so… | 我的老爸单独呆一会儿 |
| [11:28] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [11:29] | It’s just that I used to goto Vikes’s | 只是我之前是和我的姨妈一起 |
| [11:31] | with my aunt; may she rest in peace. | 去看维京队的比赛 愿她安息 |
| [11:40] | Anyway, so back to my story. | 好了 言归正传 |
| [11:43] | She also loved burgers. | 她也喜欢汉堡 |
| [11:50] | So now, back to my story. | 现在 我接着说 |
| [11:54] | Aunt Laura sure loved a toasted bun. | 面包烤一烤的话劳拉姨妈会很欣慰的 |
| [12:02] | Tina, please tell me Sandy’s here. | 蒂娜 桑迪一定要在你那里啊 |
| [12:04] | Don’t worry, he’s here. | 别担心 他在这里呢 |
| [12:06] | And we’re back… together! | 我们又回来了 一起回来的 |
| [12:08] | He told me he loves me, he’s sorry, | 他说他爱我 而且他很抱歉 |
| [12:11] | and I’m the only girl for him. | 他说我是他的唯一 |
| [12:14] | You know, since we’re all here, | 那么 既然我们都在一起了 |
| [12:16] | and we’re all horny… | 而且我们又那么淫荡 |
| [12:20] | I don’t know what went wrong. | 我不知道哪里出错了 |
| [12:23] | Well, proposing the three-way was bad, | 唔 你提出要玩双飞是不对的 |
| [12:24] | starting without us was worse, | 而且我们都不在就开搞是更坏的 |
| [12:26] | finishing in the hallway was the nail in the coffin. | 在走廊里就完事了你就万劫不复了 |
| [12:28] | No! Stop drinking! | 停 别喝了 |
| [12:30] | I gotta get you back on air! | 我得把你揪回去直播 |
| [12:32] | But I’m single and ready to mingle! | 我是光棍待脱光 |
| [12:34] | Hello, there. | 哟 小妞 |
| [12:36] | Oh, the Twitter-verse blowing up about | 哦 那个推特把一家 |
| [12:40] | a new apartment-themed bar called Puzzles. | 叫做你猜的全新的公寓主题酒吧吹爆了 |
| [12:42] | Why is it called Puzzles? | 为什么叫你猜呢 |
| [12:43] | That’s the puzzle! | 你猜 |
| [12:45] | Anyway, this VIP room has a maximum occupancy | 总之 这间贵宾室最多能容下 |
| [12:48] | of two people including me, so eeny… | 两个人 包括我 所以一个 |
| [12:50] | and the rest of you may go. | 你们其他人可以走了 |
| [12:54] | It’s funny, but it seems each time | 说起来很有趣 但好像每次 |
| [12:57] | I read James Joyce’s Ulysses, | 我读詹姆斯 乔伊斯的《尤利西斯》 |
| [13:01] | it’s a different book, | 它都是一本不同的书 |
| [13:03] | begging the question: Has the book changed… | 要讨论的问题是 是书变了 |
| [13:06] | or have I? | 还是我变了 |
| [13:12] | Okay, people are getting rowdy and drunk and breaking things. | 够了 人们开始变得吵闹 喝醉 还打碎东西 |
| [13:14] | I know this goes against the Puzzles mission statement | 这违反了你让我背熟的 |
| [13:16] | you made me memorize, but we gotta raise our drink prices. | 你猜责任声明 但我们必须抬高酒价了 |
| [13:19] | All right, just a little bit so no one will notice. | 好吧 只抬一点 这样就没人注意到了 |
| [13:26] | Boo! | 嘭 |
| [13:29] | Poodles sucks! | 我猜太逊了 |
| [13:30] | And that’s when the night turned to absolute crap. | 这就是那晚彻底毁掉的时候 |
| [13:33] | At Puzzles, we all fit together | 在你猜 我们都很愉快 |
| [14:01] | And so Puzzles got a bouncer, | 所以你猜有了一个保镖 |
| [14:04] | All right, you know what, you guys? | 好了 知道该怎么样吗 你们 |
| [14:11] | No. No, no, no, no, no, you said double | 不不不不不不 你说的是按 |
| [14:12] | what MacLaren’s was paying me. | 麦克莱伦的两倍给我钱 |
| [14:14] | And why isn’t anyone wearing the hats I brought up?! | 为什么没人戴我拿来的帽子 |
| [14:20] | “November 14th… | 1982年 |
| [14:22] | “1982. | 11月14日 |
| [14:23] | “Everglades National Park, Florida. | 佛罗里达的大沼泽地国家公园 |
| [14:26] | “Five mysterious lights dance in the night sky. | 5个谜一样的的亮光在空中飞舞 |
| [14:29] | “A ray shoots down, lifting the park ranger, | 一道光线射下 升起了一个公园护林员 |
| [14:32] | “Who, to be fair, was going through a bad divorce | 公平的说 他正经历一场很糟糕的离婚 |
| [14:35] | and had a habit of lying to get attention.” | 他还喜欢通过撒谎来吸引人们的注意 |
| [14:40] | I hate this job, Sandy! | 我恨这份工作 桑迪 |
| [14:42] | I went into journalism to make a difference, | 我投身新闻事业是为了有所改变 |
| [14:44] | but you have made that impossible. | 但你让这变得不可能 |
| [14:46] | You know, to be honest, it hasn’t been | 你知道吗 老实说 我这几个月过的 |
| [14:48] | an easy couple months for me. I’ve made mistakes. | 一直不顺 我犯了不少错误 |
| [14:50] | I’ve felt alone. I had to let go of dreams | 我感到孤独 我要让那些我甚至都不知道我有的 |
| [14:53] | I didn’t even know I had. | 梦想离我而去 |
| [14:54] | So here’s the deal: | 所以你给我听好 |
| [14:56] | You’re gonna get back on air | 你要继续直播 |
| [14:58] | and count us into a better year, | 把我们倒数到更好的一年 |
| [14:59] | because I just can’t do 2011 anymore. You with me? | 因为我不能再呆在2011了 你听到了吗 |
| [15:04] | He’s not with me, is he? | 他根本没听 是不是 |
| [15:13] | Anyway, Dad, where was I? | 总之 爸爸 我当时在哪 |
| [15:16] | You know what? Fine, get out of here! | 知道吗 好 滚出去 |
| [15:17] | We don’t need ya! | 我们不需要你们 |
| [15:21] | And why doesn’t anybody like these hats? | 为什么没人喜欢这些帽子 |
| [15:24] | I made these hats. | 我做的这些帽子 |
| [15:28] | It’s because they’ wet, Doug. | 因为它们是湿的 道格 |
| [15:30] | Why are they all wet?! | 他们为什么都湿了 |
| [15:32] | Were those our last customers? | 那些是我们最后的客人吗 |
| [15:34] | Let me go check the bathroom. | 我去看看卫生间 |
| [15:41] | You must be from the escort service. | 你一定是护送服务的 |
| [15:45] | The scenario is high school wrestling match. | 本来设想的是高中摔跤比赛 |
| [15:54] | Hello? | 你好 |
| [15:55] | So get this: I lost Sandy Rivers. | 听听这个 我把桑迪 里弗斯弄丢了 |
| [15:57] | Funny you should mention that. | 有趣的是你应该早说 |
| [15:59] | It’s almost midnight! | 马上就要午夜了 |
| [16:00] | What am I gonna do, go on the air myself? | 我该怎么做 自己上直播 |
| [16:02] | Listen… Wait. Yeah, do that! | 听着 等一下 好极了 就这么干 |
| [16:06] | No, I-I can’t actually. | 不 实际上我不能 |
| [16:07] | Yes, you can. It’s what you really want and you deserve it. | 不 你能 这就是你真正想要的也是你应得的 |
| [16:10] | Kevin, that’s not how it works. | 凯文 事情不是那么运作的 |
| [16:12] | Sounds like that’s your only choice. | 听上去那是你唯一的选择 |
| [16:13] | New York’s a big city. | 纽约是个大城市 |
| [16:16] | Sandy Rivers could be anywhere. | 桑迪 里弗斯可能在任何地方 |
| [16:19] | And… wrestle! | 预备 开摔 |
| [16:23] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [16:25] | I’m sorry, baby. | 对不起 宝贝 |
| [16:28] | I just… I want our kid | 我只是 我希望我们的孩子 |
| [16:30] | to believe that the universe is magical. | 相信宇宙是魔幻的 |
| [16:32] | You know, like my dad taught me. | 你知道 就像我爸爸教我的那样 |
| [16:34] | You know what my dad taught me? | 你知道我爸爸教我什么了吗 |
| [16:36] | Nothing… ’cause he was never there. | 什么也没教 因为他从来不在我身边 |
| [16:40] | “June 22nd, 1996, Brooklyn, New York. | 1996年6月22日 纽约 布鲁克林 |
| [16:44] | “A man misses his daughter’s high school graduation. | 一个男人错过了他女儿的高中毕业典礼 |
| [16:48] | “Later, she discovers her babysitting money | 后来 她发现她照顾孩子的钱 |
| [16:50] | “Has been spent on a board game called | 被花在了一个叫做 |
| [16:52] | Who Stole The Babysitting Money?” | 谁偷了看孩子的钱的桌游 |
| [16:55] | He never saw the irony in that. | 他始终看不出来这里面的讽刺 |
| [16:58] | “December 31st, 2011. | 2011年12月31日 |
| [17:01] | “A woman calls her father to tell him she’s pregnant. | 一个女人给他的爸爸打电话告诉他她怀孕了 |
| [17:05] | says, ‘Great. Thanks,’ and hangs up on her.” | 说 好极了 谢谢 然后挂掉了他的电话 |
| [17:08] | And after pushing her to call him, | 在促使她给他打电话后 |
| [17:12] | a Big Foot is discovered in her husband’s mouth. | 在他丈夫的嘴里发现了一只大脚怪 |
| [17:17] | I’m glad you’re a believer, baby, | 我很高兴你相信这些 宝贝 |
| [17:19] | but I’m never gonna believe in an “Enigma of the mystical” | 但我永远不会相信谜团团 |
| [17:24] | unless I see it with my own eyes. | 除非我亲眼看到 |
| [17:27] | Because the truth is, | 因为实际上 |
| [17:29] | my father never taught me believe in anything but myself. | 我爸爸从不教我相信任何事 除了我自己 |
| [17:34] | Well, if it helps at all, I believe in you, too. | 那么 如果有用的话 我也相信你 |
| [17:39] | Then there’s a pretty good chance I don’t exist. | 那么很有可能我是不存在的 |
| [17:43] | How dare you?! | 你胆子不小 |
| [17:48] | Oh, my God! | 哦 天啊 |
| [17:50] | This is Robin Scherbatsky filling in for Sandy Rivers. | 这里是罗宾 舍巴斯基 代替桑迪 里弗斯 |
| [17:53] | You know, America, | 你知道吗 美国 |
| [17:55] | tonight I’ve been groped, stepped in puke | 今晚我被人吃了豆腐 踩到了呕吐物 |
| [17:58] | and until 10 minutes ago I had no idea I would be on national television | 10分钟以前我都没想到能在全国电视台上出镜 |
| [18:03] | That’s my girl. | 果然是我认识的罗宾 |
| [18:04] | But that’s the magic of New Year’s. | 不过这就是新年到来的神奇之处 |
| [18:07] | When that clock strikes midnight, | 当时针指向零点午夜的时候 |
| [18:08] | we all get a fresh start. | 我们就会迎来一个全新的开始 |
| [18:10] | And I don’t know about you, but I could really use one. | 我虽然不知道大家会如何 但我肯定会有一个好的开始 |
| [18:14] | And that magic moment starts in ten… | 这个神奇的时刻就会发生在十 |
| [18:18] | nine… | 九 |
| [18:20] | That night became a turning point in Robin’s career. | 那夜也变成了罗宾职业路上得一个转折点 |
| [18:26] | But we’ll get to that. | 不过这个我们以后再说 |
| [18:29] | They’re nice hats, Doug. | 这些帽子很可爱啊 道格 |
| [18:31] | They’re wet but they’re nice. | 他们虽然是湿的不过好看啊 |
| [18:34] | …three, two, one. | 三 二 一 |
| [18:41] | And that’s the story of New Year’s Eve. | 这就是新年前夜的一段故事 |
| [18:43] | You know, I’ve been thinking | 我最近一直在思考 你知道么 |
| [18:44] | that the reason I got so intense with Lily | 我跟莉莉的关系非常紧张的原因是 |
| [18:47] | about Enigmas of the Mystical is that, well… | 有关于谜团团这本书 那个 |
| [18:51] | Could you pass the pickles? | 你能递给我那罐酸菜么 |
| [18:54] | …with you gone, I feel the mystical a little less. | 随着你的离开 我感觉谜团团并没有那么的神秘了 |
| [18:57] | Can you hand me the chips? | 你能递给我那包薯片么 |
| [19:00] | Sometimes I feel you a little less. | 而且有时候我我觉得我想起您的时候更少了 |
| [19:02] | That’s why today was so important because I just… | 这就是为什么今天那么的重要 |
| [19:06] | I needed to… | 我需要跟 |
| [19:10] | Did you just open a beer on my father’s headstone? | 你是刚刚用我爸的墓碑开了你的瓶酒么 |
| [19:14] | Actually, it’s a hard cider. | 其实 这支是苹果酒(酒精低于10%) |
| [19:16] | And just as he was about to lose it… | 正当他感觉到要失控的时候 |
| [19:19] | Hey, Marvin, can you pass me a burger? | 嘿 马文 你能递给我个汉堡么 |
| [19:21] | Hey, not Marvin. Marshall. | 噢 不是马文 是马修 |
| [19:22] | Sorry, it’s just, you’re so much like your pop. | 不好意思 只是 只是你跟你老爸非常的像 |
| [19:25] | Your Uncle Marshall thought back | 你们的马修叔叔又想到 |
| [19:27] | to all those tailgates with his father. | 那些在车后挡板与父亲一起的故事 |
| [19:31] | Hey, mind if I grab one? | 嘿 你介意我拿一个走么 |
| [19:33] | -The more the merrier! -All right. | -拿的越多我越高兴 -那敢情好 |
| [19:35] | The time has come to heal our wounds | 时间会慢慢愈合我们的伤口 |
| [19:40] | The time has come, it’s coming soon… | 这个时刻就要来临 即将来临 |
| [19:50] | And he realized that maybe private moments are overrated. | 他意识到他对于自己所认为的私人空间看得太重了 |
| [19:54] | You know what? | 我告诉你 |
| [19:56] | The more the merrier. | 你拿得越多越好 |
| [19:59] | Hey, guys. | 嘿 大伙 |
| [20:01] | The time has come to heal the wounds. | 时间会抚平这个伤口 |
| [20:02] | Happy New Year. | 新年快乐 |
| [20:08] | Happy New Year. | 新年快乐 |
| [20:13] | January 1st, 2012, East Meadow, New York. | 二零一二年元月一号 东梅多 纽约 |
| [20:16] | A woman answers her door to find something more enigmatic | 一个女人发现了更神秘的事情在她的自家门口 |
| [20:20] | and mysterious than Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster. | 甚至比大脚怪和尼斯湖水怪更加神秘的事情 |
| [20:22] | Dad? | 爸 |
| [20:24] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [20:26] | I thought you were in Chicago. | 你不是在芝加哥么 |
| [20:27] | I was. | 我之前是在 |
| [20:29] | Great. Thanks. | 知道了 谢谢通知 |
| [20:32] | My daughter’s having a baby! | 我女儿怀孕啦 |
| [20:40] | Did you drive all night? | 你开了一整夜过来的么 |
| [20:42] | Yeah. | 恩 |
| [20:43] | Well, Teddy and I split the drive. | 呵呵 泰迪熊跟我轮换开车过来的 |
| [20:47] | This guy’s a maniac behind the wheel. | 这伙计就在车上就像个疯子 |
| [20:51] | Congrats, Princess. | 恭喜了 我的小公主 |
| [20:57] | Happy New Year, Dad. | 新年快乐 爸 |