| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | In May of 2012, Marshall and Lily | 2012年5月 马修和莉莉 |
| [00:02] | hosted a baby shower in the apartment. | 在家举办新生儿送礼会 |
| [00:05] | All their friends were there. | 他们所有朋友都来了 |
| [00:06] | So of course I made sure to show up exactly… | 我也确保自己准时在… |
| [00:10] | …three hours late. | 3小时之后出现 |
| [00:11] | – Oh, no! Am I late? – Little bit. | -我来晚了吗 -有点 |
| [00:14] | Ah, I’m sorry, I would’ve gotten here earlier; | 对不起 我是想早点到的 |
| [00:17] | – it’s just, um… – You didn’t want to see Robin. | -只是… -你不想碰见罗宾 |
| [00:19] | I didn’t want to see Robin. | 我不想碰见罗宾 |
| [00:20] | I know, it’s childish. | 我知道这样很幼稚 |
| [00:22] | She’s not here, is she? | 她现在不在吧 |
| [00:24] | Actually… | 其实… |
| [00:27] | Oh, no! Am I early? | 我来早了吗 |
| [00:30] | Little bit. | 有点 |
| [00:34] | Whoa, she got you the red stroller? | 她送的是红色婴儿车 |
| [00:36] | Looks like I just blew her out of the water. | 看来我的车青出于”蓝”胜于”蓝”啊 |
| [00:41] | Anyway, she left before the party started. | 反正她在派对开始前就走了 |
| [00:43] | Ah, I’m really sorry, I… | 真是不好意思 |
| [00:46] | I just think it’s best if Robin and I | 我只是觉得我和罗宾 |
| [00:47] | don’t see each other for a while. | 这阵子最好先不要见面 |
| [00:48] | Ted, it’s fine; | 泰德 我无所谓 |
| [00:49] | I’m a child of divorce. | 我在离异家庭中长大 |
| [00:51] | You guys keep fighting all you want, | 你们爱怎么吵就怎么吵 |
| [00:53] | as long as the expensive gifts keep coming. | 只要贵重礼物不间断就好 |
| [00:56] | Uh, so how was the shower? | 送礼会怎么样 |
| [00:57] | It was good, | 挺好的 |
| [00:58] | although there was one weird moment | 虽然巴尼的脱衣舞娘女友 |
| [01:00] | with Barney’s new stripper girlfriend. | 有一度害气氛变得很尴尬 |
| [01:03] | 50 laps a day? | 一天50个 |
| [01:05] | Oh, my goodness, young lady. That is a lot. | 天啊 小姑娘 那可真是太多了 |
| [01:07] | Oh, is it? | 是吗 |
| [01:09] | Is it a lot, Grandma Lois? | 有很多吗 路易丝奶奶 |
| [01:12] | Yes, my girlfriend gets naked | 没错 我女朋友靠脱衣服 |
| [01:15] | and sits on guys’ laps for money. | 坐在男人腿上跳舞挣钱 |
| [01:17] | And, yes, sometimes it’s as many as 50 laps in one day. | 没错 有时候一天她能坐50个大腿 |
| [01:20] | And maybe society considers what she does | 也许社会会觉得她的工作 |
| [01:24] | to be “disgusting,” | 很”恶心” |
| [01:25] | or “sutty,” | 很”淫荡” |
| [01:27] | or verging on “prostitution,” | 跟”做鸡”没区别 |
| [01:30] | or actual “prostitution.” | 或就是”做鸡” |
| [01:33] | But you know what, I accept her. | 但我接受她 |
| [01:35] | And if you can’t do the same, | 如果你不能接受她 |
| [01:38] | well, then shame on you. | 那我真为你感到羞耻 |
| [01:42] | Shame… | 为你 |
| [01:44] | on… | 感到 |
| [01:45] | you. | 羞耻 |
| [01:49] | We were, um, talking about swimming. | 我们其实在说游泳 |
| [01:52] | How I sometimes swim 50 laps a day. | 说我一天能游50个来回 |
| [01:58] | Well, it’s great cardio. | 挺好的有氧运动啊 |
| [01:59] | Lois, can I top off your champagne? | 奶奶 我帮您加点香槟吧 |
| [02:11] | 老爸老妈浪漫史 | |
| [02:15] | You know, it’s funny, | 说来也好笑 |
| [02:17] | you tell the average guy you’re dating a stripper, | 你告诉普通男人 你和脱衣舞女约会 |
| [02:19] | he thinks it’s awesome. | 他会觉得超级棒 |
| [02:20] | Heck, you tell your mom, she high-fives you so fast, | 你告诉妈妈 她会兴奋地跟你击掌 |
| [02:23] | she doesn’t even take off her oven mitts. | 甚至连烤箱手套都来不及摘 |
| [02:25] | But if they had any idea how difficult it is: | 个中滋味若有人懂 |
| [02:28] | the jealousy, the insecurity, | 醋海里翻波 不安里浮沉 |
| [02:32] | those high-fives would be high-fives of condolence. | 连击掌都变成慰问击掌 |
| [02:36] | Barney, condolence high-fives are not a thing. | 巴尼 根本没有所谓的慰问击掌 |
| [02:40] | They’re a thing. | 当然有 |
| [02:41] | 当天早些时候… | |
| [02:42] | I’m afraid we’re gonna have to let you go. | 不好意思 我们不得不辞退你 |
| [02:45] | Up top. | 来 击掌 |
| [02:48] | Ah, listen to me and my boring couples’ problems. | 别光听我说我这些无聊的情侣问题了 |
| [02:52] | How are you? | 你怎么样 |
| [02:53] | How’s the single life? | 单身生活过得好吗 |
| [02:54] | I wouldn’t know. After this whole Robin thing, | 没什么感觉 自从罗宾这事后 |
| [02:56] | for the time being, I’m laying low. | 目前的我 比较低调 |
| [02:58] | Laying low as in | 你是说… |
| [03:00] | sleeping with a really short chick? | 标准低到跟很矮的妞上床吗 |
| [03:02] | You guys doing 39? | 你们有玩39式吗 |
| [03:04] | I mean, I’m not seeing anyone. | 我是说我没出去约会 |
| [03:06] | I’m just, you know, trying to get Robin out of my head. | 我要努力忘记罗宾 |
| [03:08] | You need a palate cleanser. | 你该”换换口味” |
| [03:10] | Barney, please, don’t try to set me up | 巴尼 求你了 千万别撮合 |
| [03:13] | with Quinn’s stripper friends. | 我和昆茵的脱衣舞女同事 |
| [03:14] | Oh, I wouldn’t dream of it. | 我才不会呢 |
| [03:15] | Why not, how many hints do I have to drop?! | 为什么不 我暗示得还不够多吗 |
| [03:17] | No, I’m thinking of something much more traditional. | 不是 我想的是比较传统的方式 |
| [03:20] | – Online dating. – Yeah, no thanks. | -如网络交友 -不用了 谢谢 |
| [03:23] | Come on, Ted! It’s 2012. | 拜托 泰德 都2012了 |
| [03:25] | What do you expect, to meet some cute travel agent | 你还指望在书店看报纸的时候 |
| [03:28] | when you’re reading a newspaper at a bookstore? | 邂逅漂亮的旅游中介吗 |
| [03:30] | None of those things exist anymore. | 现在没这种事了 |
| [03:32] | Barney, I will never, ever, ever, | 巴尼 我是绝对不可能 |
| [03:37] | try online dating. | 去尝试网络交友的 |
| [03:38] | That night I tried online dating. | 那天晚上我试了网络交友 |
| [03:40] | And kids, the first girl I found was amazing: | 孩子们 我遇到的第一个女孩就很棒 |
| [03:43] | beautiful, smart, funny, | 她漂亮聪明 风趣幽默 |
| [03:46] | huge fan of prewar architecture, | 热爱战前建筑 |
| [03:47] | favorite poet Neruda, | 最喜欢的诗人是聂鲁达 |
| [03:47] | 聂鲁达 智利当代著名诗人 | |
| [03:49] | favorite movie Ghostbusters, | 最喜欢的电影是《捉鬼敢死队》 |
| [03:50] | and she didn’t hate Cleveland. | 而且不讨厌克利夫兰 |
| [03:52] | She’s perfect. | 她简直太完美了 |
| [03:55] | So I sent her an email, | 于是我给她发了封邮件 |
| [03:56] | inviting her to mini golf. | 邀请她去打迷你高尔夫 |
| [04:05] | – Hello. – Mini golf? | -喂 -迷你高尔夫 |
| [04:06] | Who takes a first date to mini golf? | 谁第一次约会去打迷你高尔夫啊 |
| [04:08] | I’m coming over! | 我现在过去 |
| [04:10] | Oh, Ted-Ted-Ted- Teddy-Ted-Ted. | 泰德 泰德 泰迪小德德 |
| [04:13] | Who buzzed you in? | 谁让你进来的 |
| [04:14] | Did you really think you could start dating online, | 你真以为你玩网络交友时 |
| [04:16] | and I wouldn’t find out? | 我会不知道吗 |
| [04:17] | But with thi-this girl, sh-she was… | 可这个女孩 她是… |
| [04:20] | Me. She was me, Ted. | 我 她就是我 泰德 |
| [04:22] | The photo was just of some girl I knew you’d never seen before, | 照片就是随便找了个你没见过的 |
| [04:25] | a very famous sports anchor on ESPN. | 娱乐体育电视网的知名体育主播 |
| [04:29] | Barney, I don’t need you to help me find a girl online. | 巴尼 我不用你在网上帮我找女人 |
| [04:31] | Exactly because I’ve already done it! | 当然 因为我已经找完了 |
| [04:34] | Three girls in fact. | 而且是3个 |
| [04:35] | I scoured the dating sites | 我地毯式搜索了所有交友网站 |
| [04:37] | using my own personal logarithms, | 用了自己写的对数函数 |
| [04:40] | factoring in a broad spectrum of variables, | 考虑了各种变量因素 |
| [04:42] | filtering out undesirable high-risk negatives, | 过滤掉不合标准的高风险对象 |
| [04:45] | guaranteeing a success rate of 83… | 同时保证83%的成功率… |
| [04:47] | You picked the girls that showed the most boob. | 谁的胸部露得最多 你就选谁 |
| [04:50] | My methods get results. | 我的方法可是百试百灵 |
| [04:52] | Go out with these three girls, | 你跟这3个妞出去约会 |
| [04:54] | and your palate is going to be so cleansed, | 我保证你的口味焕然一新 |
| [04:56] | you will see your reflection in it. | 崭新锃亮到能看见自己的倒影 |
| [04:58] | And when you do, | 到时候 |
| [04:59] | you can fix the hair, | 好好打理下你的头发 |
| [05:00] | because… Have you seen yourself? | 因为…你最近有照过镜子吗 |
| [05:03] | No, but you know what I have seen, | 没有 不过我最近倒是见过 |
| [05:04] | your stripper girlfriend’s cans. | 你脱衣舞女女友的咪咪哟 |
| [05:08] | That was going way too far, wasn’t it? | 这玩笑开得有点过了 对吧 |
| [05:11] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [05:12] | My condolences. | 来个慰问击掌吧 |
| [05:18] | Man, Marshall’s really stressing out about this baby. | 靠 马修因为宝宝的到来神经紧张 |
| [05:22] | He’s reading every book, | 他读各种孕妇书 |
| [05:23] | watching breast-feeding documentaries. | 看哺乳记录片 |
| [05:26] | I woke up the other day, he had swaddled me. | 某天早上我醒来 他把我裹的像个婴儿 |
| [05:29] | Sure, it was the best night’s sleep I had had in months, | 虽然那确实是几个月来 我睡的最香的一觉 |
| [05:32] | but still… | 但还是… |
| [05:33] | You know what his latest thing is? | 你知道他现在又搞什么吗 |
| [05:38] | What the hell is that? | 什么鬼东西在响 |
| [05:46] | Marshall, what is that? | 马修 你搞什么啊 |
| [05:48] | I rigged this alarm to go off every three hours. | 我定了闹铃 每3小时响一次 |
| [05:51] | I’m training myself for the | 我要把生物钟调整到 |
| [05:53] | sporadic sleep patterns of early parenthood. | 新生儿父母的不规则睡觉模式 |
| [05:55] | Now, if you’ll excuse me, | 你不介意的话 |
| [05:57] | I have a practice-baby to soothe. | 我要哄我的演练宝宝睡觉了 |
| [06:03] | You got to talk to him. | 你得跟他谈谈 |
| [06:04] | Yeah, I’ll talk to him tonight. | 好吧 我晚上跟他说 |
| [06:07] | Maybe tomorrow morning. | 还是明早再说吧 |
| [06:08] | – One last swaddle? – It’s just so cozy. | -还想再被裹一晚吗 -真的睡得好香 |
| [06:10] | It’s like sleeping in a warm burrito. | 感觉像睡在热乎乎的墨西哥卷饼里 |
| [06:13] | Meanwhile, Barney was about to have | 与此同时 巴尼准备面对 |
| [06:15] | a stripper’s boyfriend’s worst nightmare. | 脱衣舞女男友的最糟的噩梦 |
| [06:17] | Karma? | 卡玛 |
| [06:18] | Oh, my gosh, I didn’t recognize you | 天啊 你的腿没绕到脖子后面 |
| [06:19] | without your legs behind your head. | 我都没认出来是你 |
| [06:21] | Darryl, I didn’t recognize you | 达瑞尔 你没穿那件难看的风衣 |
| [06:23] | without your creepy trench coat. | 我也没认出来是你 |
| [06:25] | How are you? | 你怎么样 |
| [06:25] | – Great, you working tomorrow? – You know it. | -挺好的 你明天上班吗 -你知道的 |
| [06:28] | Great. I’ll be there with bells on. | 那就好 明天我一定穿戴好装备去 |
| [06:29] | And by bells, I mean super thin sweatpants. | 装备就是超薄运动裤 |
| [06:33] | Gross. | 真恶心 |
| [06:35] | He’s actually a nice guy. | 他这个人其实挺好的 |
| [06:37] | he’s so busy as deputy mayor, | 虽然当副市长很忙 |
| [06:38] | but I always get a card on my birthday. | 但总记得在我生日送卡片 |
| [06:41] | Quinn, I love the fact that you’re a stripper, | 昆茵 我爱你是个脱衣舞女 |
| [06:44] | but I hate the fact that you’re a stripper. | 但同时 我又很你是个脱衣舞女 |
| [06:46] | Barney, I like my job. | 巴尼 我喜欢我的工作 |
| [06:49] | And I do not need to be rescued. | 我不需要被谁拯救 |
| [06:51] | So, don’t be that guy. | 所以 别当我的英雄 |
| [06:54] | You’re right, you’re right. | 你说得对 你说得对 |
| [06:55] | I got it. Forget I said anything. | 我明白 当我没说过 |
| [06:59] | I’ll see you tonight, Karma. | 晚上去捧你的场 卡玛 |
| [07:00] | You got it, Dirty Larry. | 没问题 淫贱拉里 |
| [07:01] | You have to quit your job! | 你必须辞了这个工作 |
| [07:04] | That night, I went out with the first girl Barnrn picked for me. | 那晚 我和巴尼挑的第一个女孩约会 |
| [07:08] | There was just one problem. | 只是有个问题 |
| [07:09] | Your name is Robin? | 你叫罗宾 |
| [07:11] | Yeah, with a Y. | 对 后鼻音 |
| [07:14] | Oh, Yobin. | 是朗宾啊 |
| [07:16] | No, Robyn. | 不 是罗冰 |
| [07:18] | I go by scotch and gun lover in my online profile, | 我的网上资料写着”威士忌与枪支” |
| [07:20] | ’cause those are my two favorite things. | 那是因为我最喜欢这两样东西 |
| [07:22] | Well, next to Canada, my home and native land. | 还有就是加拿大 我的家乡和祖国 |
| [07:26] | Oh. Canada. | 加拿大 |
| [07:29] | And just like that, | 就这样 |
| [07:30] | Robyn became Robin. | 罗冰成了罗宾 |
| [07:33] | How’s it going, Ted? | 近来好吗 泰德 |
| [07:39] | Oh, good. | 太好了 |
| [07:40] | Hey, look, mommy’s back from the bar! | 瞧 你老妈舍得从酒吧回来了 |
| [07:43] | Now I can finally take a shower. | 老爸终于可以去洗澡了 |
| [07:48] | This diaper smells. | 这尿布真臭 |
| [07:49] | I don’t want to know. | 别告诉我怎么弄的 |
| [07:51] | Okay, Marshall, | 好了 马修 |
| [07:52] | sit down; we need to talk. | 快坐下 我们得谈谈 |
| [07:57] | Look, I know you mean well, | 听着 我知道你也是一片好心 |
| [07:59] | but we have five weeks till the due date. | 可我们离预产期还有五周 |
| [08:01] | Can’t we use this time to just relax? | 我们不能利用这段时间放松下吗 |
| [08:04] | We’ll figure out how all this stuff | 等宝宝出生后 |
| [08:06] | works after the baby comes. | 这些事情自然就懂了嘛 |
| [08:08] | After the baby comes? | 等宝宝出生后 |
| [08:10] | Yeah, we’ll learn on the job. | 对 我们可以边做边学 |
| [08:12] | Learn on the j… Huh. | 边做边…真逗 |
| [08:14] | Wow, you know, Lily, | 莉莉 |
| [08:16] | maybe the crisis here | 或许现在的燃眉之急 |
| [08:17] | isn’t that I’m not ready to be a dad; | 不是我没准备好当爹 |
| [08:19] | maybe it’s that you’re not ready to be a mom! | 而是你没准备好当妈 |
| [08:21] | – Excuse me?! – Yeah. | -你说什么 -对 |
| [08:22] | With that, an argument began, | 就这样 他俩吵了起来 |
| [08:24] | the details of which are still hotly debated to this day. | 个中细节至今仍存在很大的争议 |
| [08:27] | For instance, Uncle Marshall swears he never said: | 比如说 马修叔叔发誓说绝没说过这句 |
| [08:29] | – I’m the only one making sacrifices for this baby! – What?! | -我是唯一为这孩子做出牺牲的人 -什么 |
| [08:32] | And he claims he never actually altered the words: | 同时他也声称自己所说 句句属实 |
| [08:34] | It’s like you don’t even know that you’re pregnant! | 你就像连自己怀孕了都不知道一样 |
| [08:36] | While Lily insists this part was exaggerated: | 同时 莉莉坚称这一段被夸大其词 |
| [08:39] | Baby’s are easy; | 宝宝很好弄 |
| [08:40] | you just watch them be cute and feed them spaghetti! | 只要看着他们卖萌 然后喂意大利面就好了 |
| [08:43] | But everyone agrees this is how the argument ended: | 不过大家都对收场意见一致 |
| [08:46] | Marshall, what I need now is some peace, some quiet, | 马修 我要的不过是一点点清静 |
| [08:48] | and now that it’s out there, some spaghetti. | 不过现在我要的是 吃点意大利面 |
| [08:50] | Now, please help me off the couch so I can storm out. | 帮忙拉我起来 好让我夺门而出 |
| [09:00] | The next day, I filled Barney in on my date. | 第二天 我告诉巴尼我的约会经过 |
| [09:03] | Oh, Yobin. | 朗宾 |
| [09:05] | No, Robyn. | 不 是罗冰 |
| [09:07] | And for the rest of the night, | 而之后的整晚 |
| [09:09] | every time I looked at her, I just saw Robin’s face. | 只要我一看她 就会想到罗宾 |
| [09:12] | – Well, I should hope so. – No, our Robin. | -那是应该的啊 -不 是我们的罗宾 |
| [09:14] | Robin with an I. | 有个I[眼睛] |
| [09:14] | I和eye[眼睛]同音 | |
| [09:16] | Uh, our Robin has two eyes, my friend. | 我们的罗宾有两只眼睛 朋友 |
| [09:18] | But that’s good. You’re forgetting what she looks like. | 不过也不错 你已经开始忘记她的长相了 |
| [09:21] | I’m sorry, that must have been tough. | 我理解 这过程一定很艰难 |
| [09:23] | If anyone knows what that feels like, it’s me. | 如果有人能感同身受 那一定是我 |
| [09:26] | My condolence. | 请接受我的慰问 |
| [09:31] | Okay. Moving on. | 好了 向前看吧 |
| [09:33] | The next girl: perfect palate cleanser. | 下一个女孩 味道大不同 |
| [09:36] | Nothing like Robin. | 和罗宾完全不同 |
| [09:38] | How nothing? | 怎么个不同 |
| [09:39] | I gaze out into the world and all I see | 我放眼望向世界 |
| [09:41] | is an icy place where dreams die. | 只看到葬送梦想的冰冷之地 |
| [09:47] | Ooh, lasagna. | 哇 千层面 |
| [09:49] | How’s it going, Ted? | 近来好吗 泰德 |
| [09:51] | What? No. What? Wh-Why? | 什么 不 怎么会这样 |
| [09:53] | Remember, I made lasagna that one time. | 记得吗 我有次做了千层面 |
| [09:55] | That’s all it takes? | 这样你就来啦 |
| [09:57] | It wasn’t even lasagna; you took your botched kugle | 那都算不上千层面 你是往做坏的犹太面上 |
| [09:59] | and poured tomato sauce on it. | 倒了番茄酱 |
| [10:01] | I didn’t say it was good lasagna. | 我可没说那千层面做得好 |
| [10:03] | By the way, what are you doing with this girl? | 对了 你没事干嘛勾搭这种女的呢 |
| [10:06] | With tattoos all up and down her arms and… | 手臂上满是纹身 而且… |
| [10:09] | everywhere else. | 其他地方也不放过 |
| [10:10] | Hello… good gravy. | 瞧啊 我的妈呀 |
| [10:13] | Does that dragons tail go all the way down to her… | 那条龙尾巴是不是一直延伸到她的… |
| [10:15] | Ohh, yes, it does. | 没错 我猜对了 |
| [10:18] | Well, what do you want me to do, Robin? | 你还想我怎么样 罗宾 |
| [10:20] | I have to get over you somehow, | 我总得设法忘掉你 |
| [10:21] | and if this is what it takes… | 而且如果非得这样… |
| [10:23] | Are you okay? | 你没事吧 |
| [10:26] | Yeah. Why? | 没事 怎么了 |
| [10:28] | You kind of spaced out there. | 你有点魂不守舍 |
| [10:31] | Weirdo. | 怪胎 |
| [10:34] | “So, in summation, | “所以 总的来说 |
| [10:35] | I’m very, very sorry.” | 我非常非常抱歉” |
| [10:37] | “I guess I just wanted you all to myself, | “我猜我只是太想独占你 |
| [10:39] | and then I thought of all the creepy guys groping at your…” | 而我想到这些怪人打量你的…” |
| [10:41] | “Okay, I’m getting mad again, | “好吧 我又要生气了 |
| [10:43] | so I’m going to stop writing now.” | 所以我在此搁笔了” |
| [10:44] | “Please enjoy these chocolates, may contain peanuts.” | “请享用这些巧克力 可能含花生[鸡鸡]哟” |
| [10:44] | peanuts与penis谐音 | |
| [10:48] | Kiss and make up? | 亲一个就和好吧 |
| [10:52] | Have sex up against the window and make up? | 在窗前打一炮就和好吧 |
| [10:55] | You do have a great view. | 你这里风景还真不错 |
| [10:57] | Well, funny you should mention that. | 你这么说还真有意思 |
| [10:59] | It’s your view. | 因为这是你的风景 |
| [11:01] | Come again for Big Fudge? | 兄台 再说一次 |
| [11:02] | Congratulations. You’re hired. | 恭喜你 你被录用了 |
| [11:05] | You are Goliath National Bank’s | 你是巨人国家银行 |
| [11:06] | newest executive strategy coordinator. | 新任执行战略协调员 |
| [11:10] | What is an executive strategy coordinator? | 执行战略协调员是什么啊 |
| [11:12] | It’s three corporate-sounding words | 是几个感觉跟企业有关的词 |
| [11:14] | which, when added together, equal a fake job | 合起来造就的一个假职位 |
| [11:17] | for which you get a real paycheck | 但你可以得到一份实打实的薪水 |
| [11:19] | in the amount of exactly what you’d make stripping. | 和你做脱衣舞娘赚的钱一样多呢 |
| [11:21] | Plus dental. You’re welcs. | 还有牙科保险 不客气 |
| [11:24] | Now, about that up-against-the-window sex… | 现在该靠窗打炮了… |
| [11:26] | Dude, I don’t want to work for a bank. | 兄台 我不想在银行工作 |
| [11:28] | Why not? | 为什么 |
| [11:28] | Because I have standards. | 因为我不是无下限的 |
| [11:30] | You people are whores. | 你们这些人就是妓女 |
| [11:32] | The things you’re willing to do just for some money, | 为了钱 任人摆布 |
| [11:34] | it’s shameful. | 不知廉耻 |
| [11:35] | You work in a strip club. | 你可是在脱衣舞厅工作呢 |
| [11:38] | Yeah, and I like it. | 对 我喜欢我的工作 |
| [11:40] | And I’m good at it. | 而且我是行内高手 |
| [11:41] | Barney, | 巴尼 |
| [11:42] | if I took this job, you would own me. | 如果我接受这份工作 那我就成了你的人 |
| [11:45] | I would be willingly stepping into a cage, | 我将得乖乖步入牢笼 |
| [11:47] | which is something I don’t do. | 这不是我想要的生活 |
| [11:49] | Except on Thursdays, | 除了周四 |
| [11:50] | when it’s cage night at the Lusty Leopard, | “情欲小野猫”的牢笼夜 |
| [11:51] | but that’s a cardboard cage, | 可那是个纸板箱牢笼 |
| [11:53] | and I can get out of it any time I want. | 我随时都可以出笼 |
| [11:55] | You can? | 是吗 |
| [11:56] | Wow, thanks for ruining cage night. | 牢笼夜的惊险都被你拆穿了 |
| [11:59] | – Come on, Quinn. – No. | -别这样 昆茵 -不 |
| [12:00] | – I wouldn’t… – Nope. | -我不会… -不 |
| [12:01] | Don’t. | 别说了 |
| [12:03] | I think I have some thinking to do. | 我想要回去好好想想 |
| [12:07] | I… | 我… |
| [12:08] | Mr. Stinson? | 斯丁森先生 |
| [12:09] | Does this mean I get to keep my job? | 现在我是不是不用离职了 |
| [12:12] | Yeah, Herm, you can stay. | 对 赫姆 你可以留下 |
| [12:15] | Hey, baby, listen. | 宝贝 听着 |
| [12:16] | I’m-I’m sorry I flipped out. | 我很抱歉 我刚才太激动了 |
| [12:18] | Oh, that’s okay. | 没关系 |
| [12:19] | To be fair, maybe I’m at fault | 说实在的 或许错在我 |
| [12:22] | for loving our child too much, | 太爱我们的孩子了 |
| [12:23] | although that is the definition of parenting, so… | 尽管这就是为人父母的定义 所以… |
| [12:25] | All right, good make up. | 好吧 算和好了吧 |
| [12:27] | Hey, listen, I went online, | 听着 我刚才上网 |
| [12:28] | and I found this Baby Boot Camp thing | 发现了一个”宝宝训练营” |
| [12:31] | that they’re doing at a hotel in Paramus this weekend. | 这周末会在帕拉默斯的一家酒店举办培训 |
| [12:33] | Baby Boot Camp? | “宝宝训练营” |
| [12:35] | That sounds great. | 听起来不错 |
| [12:36] | Yeah, it’s a two-day event… | 是啊 这是个两天的项目 |
| [12:37] | We’re going. | 我们要去 |
| [12:37] | …and there’s lots of seminars and classes. | …还有很多研讨会和课程 |
| [12:40] | You’ve already made the sale. | 咱们一定要参加 |
| [12:41] | Anyway, I signed us up. | 我已经给我们俩报了名 |
| [12:42] | Not even listening anymore; mentally packing. | 完全听不进去 我的心已经开始打包行李了 |
| [12:45] | I’m trying to figure out the best way to get to Paramus | 我在想绕过收费口去帕拉默斯的 |
| [12:46] | without hitting any tolls. | 最佳路线 |
| [12:47] | This is gonna be great. | 这训练营一定很棒 |
| [12:50] | And that was the last time | 那就是我最后一次 |
| [12:52] | I’ll ever go out with a guy with a mustache. | 和留胡子的人约会 |
| [12:56] | This is good. | 这次不错 |
| [12:57] | This is nice, not thinking about you-know-who. | 不错 我没在想那个谁 |
| [13:00] | Just having a good time | 只陶醉其中 |
| [13:02] | and thanking God I didn’t grow that mustache. | 感谢上帝 我没留胡子 |
| [13:04] | And you, | 而你 |
| [13:05] | you’re so polite. | 你真有礼貌 |
| [13:07] | My ex-fiancé, Wayne, he had no manners. | 我的前未婚夫 韦恩 他一点礼貌都没 |
| [13:11] | Wayne had no manners. | 韦恩没礼貌 |
| [13:13] | Wayne… manners… | 韦恩…礼貌… |
| [13:15] | Wayne Manor, home of Bruce Wayne, | 韦恩庄园 布鲁斯·韦恩的家 |
| [13:18] | better known as Batman, | 他以饰演蜘蛛侠而闻名 |
| [13:20] | mentor to Dick Grayson, his orphan ward | 迪克·格雷森的导师 韦恩的养子迪克 |
| [13:22] | who at night would don the colorful vestments | 在夜晚会在穿上”神奇小子”彩色制服 |
| [13:24] | of the Boy Wonder, aka… | 人们又叫他为 |
| [13:27] | Robin. | “罗宾” |
| [13:28] | Holy long walk for a short drink of water, Ted. | 你喝一口饮料能编这么多啊 泰德 |
| [13:31] | Stop this. | 闭嘴 |
| [13:32] | I need you out of my life for real. | 我要你离开我的世界 |
| [13:34] | – You don’t mean that. – Yes, I do. | -你才不要呢 -我就要 |
| [13:36] | No, you don’t. | 不 你不要 |
| [13:37] | Look how much is changing right now. | 泰德 今非昔比啊 |
| [13:39] | Marshall and Lily are having a baby. | 马修和莉莉快生孩子了 |
| [13:41] | Barney’s shacking up with a girl. | 巴尼和一个女人同居了 |
| [13:43] | With your whole world turning upside down, | 你的整个世界 发生了翻天覆地的变化 |
| [13:45] | isn’t a friendship like this one | 你难道不想死死守住 |
| [13:47] | something you want to hold on to as tightly as possible? | 我们这样的一段友谊吗 |
| [13:52] | And every time I look at you, it hurts. | 每看你一眼 我的心就多痛一分 |
| [13:55] | …and that’s the story of my only lesbian experience. | 这就是我唯一一次的当拉拉的经历 |
| [13:59] | I’m sorry for going into so much detail. | 抱歉 细节部分说太多了 |
| [14:02] | I’ll never tell that story again. | 我以后再也不讲这事了 |
| [14:04] | Anyway, how’s your meal? | 对了 饭菜还合胃口吗 |
| [14:06] | Holly, listen, I should probably tell you, | 霍莉 听我说 或许我该坦白 |
| [14:08] | um, I’m kind of getting over someone right now. | 其实 我对某人仍余情未了 |
| [14:13] | I am so glad you said that. | 很高兴听到你这么说 |
| [14:15] | I guess I’m still getting over Wayne. | 我对韦恩也还念念不忘 |
| [14:17] | It’s been really hard. | 要走出一段感情实在太难 |
| [14:20] | Can I interest you in some sorbet? | 两位要来份果汁冰糕吗 |
| [14:22] | You two look like you could both use a palate cleanser. | 你俩看起来都该”换换口味”了 |
| [14:30] | How’s your palate, Ted? | 我这顿饭菜合你胃口吗 泰德 |
| [14:32] | Pretty cleansed. | 焕然一新 |
| [14:38] | You know, at this seminar, | 在研讨会上 |
| [14:39] | there’s gonna be the one guy who’s, like, Mr. Parenting Expert, | 将会有某位自许”育儿专家”的人 |
| [14:42] | keeps interrupting the speakers with his own “important facts.” | 时不时用自己的”重要观点” 打断讲师的话 |
| [14:46] | And you’re gonna be sitting right next to him, | 而那个人 就坐在你旁边 |
| [14:48] | so get ready for that. | 准备大开眼界吧 |
| [14:50] | Baby, you’ve been a little sleep deprived lately. | 亲爱的 你最近有点睡眠不足 |
| [14:53] | Why don’t you let me drive? | 不如让我开车吧 |
| [14:54] | You know what, that’s not such a bad idea. | 这个主意倒是不坏 |
| [14:58] | I mean, the last thing we want is | 可我们都不希望看到 |
| [15:00] | for me to get behind the wheel and just… | 我一坐上驾驶座就… |
| [15:13] | Oh, baby, you smell good. | 亲爱的 你可真香 |
| [15:16] | When we get to that hotel, | 等我们到了酒店 |
| [15:18] | I’m gonna wear your pregnant belly like a hat. | 我要与你颠鸾倒凤 缠绵不休 |
| [15:21] | You’ll have to buy me a couple of cocktails first. | 那你可得先把我灌醉哟 |
| [15:24] | Bar-Barney! | 巴 巴尼 |
| [15:25] | Where are we? | 我们这是在哪儿 |
| [15:26] | Atlantic City, baby! | 大西洋城啊 宝贝 |
| [15:30] | Well, in 14 miles. | 其实还有14英里才到 |
| [15:36] | What the hell is going on? | 这到底是怎么回事 |
| [15:38] | And where is Lily? | 莉莉人呢 |
| [15:39] | And what did you do to the practice baby? | 你对我的”演练宝宝”做了什么 |
| [15:43] | And is there any left? | 宝宝还有剩吗 |
| [15:46] | Lily was worried about you. | 莉莉很担心你 |
| [15:47] | She thought you needed to unwind, so… | 她认为你该放松一下 所以… |
| [15:50] | I mean, the last thing we want is for me to | 我们都不希望看到 |
| [15:52] | get behind the wheel and just… | 我一坐上驾驶座就… |
| [16:00] | She made reservations for two deluxe rooms, | 她在棕榈泉订了两间豪华套房 |
| [16:01] | massages, and dinner at the Palm, | 按摩 还有晚餐 |
| [16:03] | and in return, I made her cookies. | 作为交换 我烤了饼干给她 |
| [16:09] | So, there’s no Baby Boot Camp at the Paramus Waldorf? | 所以华尔道夫酒店的宝宝预热营是假的咯 |
| [16:13] | Is there even a Paramus Waldorf? | 话说帕拉默斯有华尔道夫酒店吗 |
| [16:16] | Bro… | 老弟 |
| [16:17] | I am so mad at Lily right now. | 莉莉这是要气死我呀 |
| [16:19] | She knew you would be; | 她早料到你会这样 |
| [16:20] | that’s why she packed this. | 所以她准备了这个 |
| [16:26] | My Mad-at-Lily shirt. | 我的”气死莉莉”T恤 |
| [16:28] | I had this made for me | 这是我为我的 |
| [16:30] | and my high school girlfriend, Steph. | 高中女友史戴芙专门订做的衣服 |
| [16:32] | In reality, “Marshall and Steph 4-eva” | 实际上 “马修和史戴芙 天长地久” |
| [16:34] | turned out to be | 结果却成了 |
| [16:35] | “Marshall and Steph for two days | “马修和史戴芙 两天分手 |
| [16:37] | until Steph’s boyfriend got out of juvie a week early.” | 因为史戴芙的男友提前一周出了少管所” |
| [16:41] | Drives Lily crazy when I wear it. | 每次穿这个 莉莉都气得要死 |
| [16:44] | I hope she’s miserable without me. | 希望没了我 她孤苦凄惨 |
| [16:51] | Hey, Ted, how’s tricks? | 泰德 最近如何啊 |
| [16:53] | Tricks are pretty good, Lou. | 相当不错 卢 |
| [16:55] | Had some girl trouble earlier in the week, but, uh, | 前几天遇到了点感情上的麻烦 不过 |
| [16:57] | I got a feeling from here on out, things are gonna be A… | 我感觉从今往后 事情会越来越… |
| [17:00] | O-Oh, you son of a bitch. | 靠 你有完没完啊 |
| [17:02] | Hello. | 你好呀 |
| [17:07] | Lily’s right. | 莉莉说得对 |
| [17:08] | I’ve been acting crazy. | 我最近太不正常了 |
| [17:09] | No, it’s okay, bro. | 没关系 老弟 |
| [17:10] | I mean, yeah, you’ve been a little crazy, | 我是说 你最近是有点不正常 |
| [17:13] | but it comes from love. | 可那都是因为爱 |
| [17:14] | It’s the same kind of crazy that makes a man | 这种不正常 就和某男愿意 |
| [17:17] | offer his stripper girlfriend over half a million dollars | 从政府援助金里拿出50万大洋 |
| [17:20] | of government bailout money, | 付给他的脱衣舞娘女友 |
| [17:21] | not to rub up on other guys’ junk. | 只要她别在男人的老二上蹭来蹭去一样 |
| [17:23] | It’s good crazy. | 我们都是出于善意 |
| [17:30] | I hope Lily’s okay. | 希望莉莉没事 |
| [17:31] | Okay, you know, that’s it, bro. | 够了 老弟 |
| [17:32] | We’re both turning off our phones for one hour. | 我们俩都关掉手机一小时 |
| [17:34] | Motion denied. | 动议被否决 |
| [17:36] | Okay, you leave me no choice. | 好吧 你让我别无选择 |
| [17:39] | Proposal: you give me one hour of phone-free bro time, | 我提议 我们关机1小时享受兄弟时间 |
| [17:42] | during which we, and by we I mean you, | 在此期间我们 也就是你自己 |
| [17:45] | get magnificently, mythologically drunk. | 来个前无古人 后无来者的酩酊大醉 |
| [17:48] | I’m talking needing-subtitles- when-you-speak drunk. | 我是指”醉得说话都得带字幕”的那种 |
| [17:52] | If you can give me that, | 如果你能做到 |
| [17:54] | I will wear this. | 我就系上这个 |
| [17:57] | The ducky tie? | 小鸭领带 |
| [17:58] | I thought you threw that thing away. | 我以为你早把它扔了呢 |
| [18:00] | I did. | 我是扔了 |
| [18:02] | It came back. | 它自己回来了 |
| [18:04] | All right, Barney, | 好吧 巴尼 |
| [18:05] | you got yourself a deal. | 你成功打动我了 |
| [18:10] | Um, excuse me, miss. | 不好意思 小姐 |
| [18:13] | Um, when you get a chance, | 你有空的话 |
| [18:14] | could you bring over a hundred shots of tequila, please? | 能请你端来100杯龙舌兰酒吗 |
| [18:18] | I’ll have the same. | 也给我来一份 |
| [18:24] | Why are you still here? | 你为什么就不能放过我呢 |
| [18:25] | Why do you think I’m still here? | 你觉得呢 |
| [18:27] | I guess because I’m in love with you. | 我猜是因为我还爱着你吧 |
| [18:31] | Why else would I be seeing your face everywhere I look? | 不然怎么会走到哪里 都能看到你的脸 |
| [18:33] | Because you feel bad. | 那是因为你心里难过 |
| [18:35] | Of course I feel bad. | 我当然难过 |
| [18:37] | I told you I love you, | 我告诉你 我爱你 |
| [18:39] | which is apparently | 而显然 |
| [18:40] | the worst thing you can say to someone. | 这是最不应该说出口的一句话 |
| [18:42] | That’s not why you feel bad. | 这不是你难过的原因 |
| [18:44] | You feel bad because after you said it, | 你难过是因为 你说了这句话 |
| [18:46] | you let me go away. | 却还是放手让我走掉 |
| [18:49] | I know our relationship | 我明白我们的关系 |
| [18:50] | isn’t exactly what you want it to be, | 和你期望的不太一样 |
| [18:53] | and I know I may not love you the way you love me, | 我也知道 或许我不如你爱我那般深 |
| [18:56] | but I do love you. | 但 我是爱你的 |
| [19:00] | Isn’t that worth hanging on to? | 这难道不值得死死守住吗 |
| [19:09] | I miss you. | 我好想你 |
| [19:10] | 金温尿牌啤酒[马修前下属生产的啤酒 参见S6E07] | |
| [19:10] | So go get me back. | 还不快去把我找回来 |
| [19:20] | Robin? | 罗宾 |
| [19:21] | Ted. | 泰德 |
| [19:22] | It’s good to really see you. | 能见到你真人太好了 |
| [19:23] | I mean, it’s really good to see you. | 我是说 能见到你真太好了 |
| [19:25] | Look, I think we need to talk. | 我们应该好好谈谈 |
| [19:26] | Uh, me, too, but now’s not a good time. | 我也这么想 可现在不是时候 |
| [19:28] | Why not? | 为什么 |
| [19:30] | I am proud of you, bro. | 为你骄傲 老弟 |
| [19:32] | You turned off your phone for one hour, | 你不但关机1小时 |
| [19:34] | and you got so drunk… | 还喝得酩酊大醉 |
| [19:35] | 现在我说话都得挂上字幕 | |
| [19:40] | Exactly. | 要的就是这效果 |
| [19:42] | 我说 巴尼 | |
| [19:44] | Yes, Marshall? | 干嘛 马修 |
| [19:46] | 咱现在能把手机打开了不 | |
| [19:48] | Well, I don’t see why not. | 当然可以 |
| [19:52] | Whoa! I’ve got 17 new voicemails. | 哎哟 我有17条语音留言呢 |
| [19:55] | Barney, it’s Lily. | 巴尼 我是莉莉 |
| [19:57] | You guys need to get back to New York right away. | 你俩最好赶紧滚回纽约 |
| [19:59] | I’m in labor. | 我快生了 |
| [20:02] | All hail Beercules! | 向啤酒猛男里斯致敬 |
| [20:02] | 马修喝醉后给自己取的外号 参见S7E2 | |
| [20:05] | Yeah! | 万岁 |
| [20:16] | All right, Barney, you got yourself a deal. | 好吧 巴尼 你成功打动我了 |
| [20:24] | Hey, you’ve reached Marshall. | 这是马修的语音信箱 |
| [20:25] | Please leave a message. | 请留言 |
| [20:27] | Hey, baby, it’s me. | 亲爱的 是我 |
| [20:29] | I think I’m labor. | 我可能快生了 |
| [20:32] | We should do this every weekend. | 我们应该每周来一次 |
| [20:35] | Okay, this is real. | 这次是真的 |
| [20:36] | It’s not a false alarm. | 不是在玩狼来了 |
| [20:38] | This is real; I’m in labor. | 我真的要生了 |
| [20:39] | I kind of need you to call me back now. | 我要你赶快回我电话 |
| [20:41] | How does somebody so little | 你说你如此娇小 |
| [20:43] | have such strong fingers? | 手指怎么会如此有力呢 |
| [20:46] | Where are you? | 你在哪里 |
| [20:47] | Call me! | 回我电话 |
| [20:48] | He is the manager of the Paramus Waldorf. | 这位兄弟是帕拉默斯的华尔道夫酒店经理 |
| [20:51] | You come to Paramus, we will hook you up. | 你要是来帕拉默斯玩 我们罩着你 |
| [20:55] | If you’re trying to get back at me, | 如果你是想要借机报复我 |
| [20:57] | you have chosen a wildly inappropriate way of doing so! | 那你这招可真是他妈的大错特错了 |
| [21:02] | Oh, yeah… Oh, yeah. | 爽哉 美哉 |