| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | In the spring of 2013, | 2013年春天 |
| [00:04] | Barney and Robin were just weeks away from tying the knot. | 巴尼和罗宾距喜结连理只有几周之遥了 |
| [00:06] | But there were still some pretty big issues they hadn’t agreed on. | 可在某些大事上 他们还未做决定 |
| [00:09] | Adoption. | 领养 |
| [00:11] | I don’t know. | 我不知道啊 |
| [00:12] | It’s the only thing that makes sense. | 只有领养才说得通 |
| [00:14] | I can’t… I can’t believe you’re not open to it. | 我真的不敢相信你会不接受 |
| [00:17] | Okay. Let’s try it. | 好吧 那就试试吧 |
| [00:20] | Nope, it doesn’t work with 27 down. | 不行 竖着的第27个词就不合适了 |
| [00:24] | Hey, with the wedding so close, | 嘿 考虑到咱婚礼快到了 |
| [00:26] | maybe we should talk about | 也许我们该讨论下 |
| [00:28] | where we’re going to live. | 结婚后住在哪儿吧 |
| [00:29] | Fine, enough. | 好吧 够了 |
| [00:31] | Stop begging. | 不用求我了 |
| [00:32] | We’ll live here. | 我们就住这儿 |
| [00:33] | But you owe me. | 但这算你欠我的 |
| [00:34] | Yeah, I don’t know… | 是啊 我说不清 |
| [00:35] | there’s just a lot of things | 就是我不是完全喜欢 |
| [00:36] | I don’t totally love about your apartment. | 你公寓里的一些东西 |
| [00:39] | Like what? | 比如什么 |
| [00:40] | Well, for example, why is | 好吧 举个例子 |
| [00:42] | your bed on what look like train tracks? | 为什么你的床好像放在类似铁轨的东西上 |
| [00:46] | You were wonderful. | 你太厉害了 |
| [00:49] | Well, you don’t get to be a state-certified orgasmologist | 要是连如何取悦女人都不知道 |
| [00:53] | without learning how to please a woman. | 怎么能成为获得国家认可的高潮大师呢 |
| [00:54] | You don’t mind if I spend the night, do you? | 你不介意我留下来过夜吧 |
| [00:56] | Um, how else are we gonna | 呃 不这样的话 |
| [00:58] | get to know each other on a deeper level? | 我们怎么能更深一步地了解对方呢 |
| [01:01] | Excuse me, | 不好意思 |
| [01:02] | I just have to log tonight’s orgasms with the licensing board. | 我得把今晚的高潮报告上交给董事会 |
| [01:20] | The Ho-be-gone Sleep System | 妞-走-人 睡眠系统 |
| [01:22] | by Stinson, patent pending. | 斯丁森出品 专利申请中 |
| [01:24] | What-what is on the other side of the wall? | 墙的另外一面究竟是什么 |
| [01:27] | Where do the hos go? | 那些小妞们都去哪了 |
| [01:28] | What am I, a contractor? | 我哪知道 你以为我是装修公司啊 |
| [01:30] | We-we need to go into this marriage with a fresh start. | 我们的婚姻要有个崭新的开端 |
| [01:35] | What do you say we find a new place together? | 你说咱俩一起找个新房子住如何 |
| [01:39] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [01:40] | And if that will make you happy, | 如果那能让你高兴的话 |
| [01:42] | then let’s do it. | 咱就找吧 |
| [01:47] | Wow, so we need to find an apartment where I haven’t banged someone? | 喔 那我得在一个我没睡过妞的地方找个公寓 |
| [01:51] | How do you feel about Cleveland? | 你觉得克利夫兰怎么样 |
| [01:53] | Ha, ha. | 哈 哈 |
| [01:54] | Nope. Ted’s mom. | 不行 那有泰德妈妈 |
| [02:08] | Shh… | 嘘 |
| [02:14] | Nice job filling in for Lily on Marvin’s lullaby. | 你替莉莉给马文唱催眠曲 唱得不错啊 |
| [02:16] | Thanks, but I came in early on the horsie. | 谢谢 就是唱小马那段时我好像快了点 |
| [02:19] | Stupid! | 笨死了 |
| [02:20] | No, you really nailed all of Lily’s parts. | 不 你真的把莉莉的部分唱的很好了 |
| [02:24] | It’s been three weeks since I have. | 我三个星期前才练好 |
| [02:27] | I barely see her anymore ’cause of this new job. | 因为莉莉工作的事 我都没怎么见她 |
| [02:31] | Well, you know what might cheer you up? | 知道什么能让你开心起来吗 |
| [02:33] | There’s a new Woodworthy Manor on tonight. | 今晚有伍德沃斯庄园的新剧集哦 |
| [02:36] | Woodworthy Manor | 伍德沃斯庄园是一部 |
| [02:38] | was a show about an upper class English estate at the beginning of the 20th century. | 讲述20世纪初英国上层阶级故事的电视剧 |
| [02:42] | My word! You can’t possibly mean… | 我的天 你不可能说的是… |
| [02:44] | But I do! | 可我是这样想的 |
| [02:45] | With the succession of Lady Eastbrooke to Viscountess of Marlyemead, | 自从伊斯特布鲁克太太继承给了玛丽米德子爵夫人 |
| [02:48] | our cousin Baldrick becomes the Earl of Witherstead. | 我们的侄子博德里克就成了维泽施德伯爵 |
| [02:51] | The Earl of Witherstead! | 维泽施德伯爵啊 |
| [02:52] | I only posted that prediction 15 times on the forums! | 我都在论坛上预测过15遍了 |
| [02:56] | No, I can’t. | 不行 我不能 |
| [02:57] | I promised Lily that I would wait and watch it with her. | 我答应莉莉了 要等她一起看 |
| [02:59] | Problem is, the Captain. | 问题在于 船长大人 |
| [03:01] | Lily had just started a job | 莉莉刚开始为一位有怪癖的 |
| [03:03] | as the art consultant for an eccentric billionaire, the Captain. | 亿万富翁 船长大人 做艺术顾问 |
| [03:10] | Ahoy. | 啊嗬 |
| [03:11] | There’s a hot new artist in Red Hook. | 瑞德虎克有个炙手可热的新艺术家 |
| [03:11] | 瑞德虎克位于布鲁克林 | |
| [03:12] | He’s molded world currency into a sculpture | 他熔了世界各国的货币铸成一座雕像 |
| [03:15] | of a soulless plutocrat defecating on the poor. | 雕像是一位无情的大富豪在穷人身上拉翔 |
| [03:18] | A scathing indictment of capitalism. | 这是对资本主义的无情控诉 |
| [03:20] | I’ll go as high as $200K | 我最高愿意出20万美元 |
| [03:22] | as long as you think I can flip it for double in six months. | 如果六个月后我转手 价钱能翻倍的话 |
| [03:24] | Aye, aye, Cap’n. | 遵命 船长大人 |
| [03:25] | Sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [03:33] | Ahoy. | 啊嗬 |
| [03:34] | here’s this gorgeously delicate impressionist still life, | 这儿有一幅画工超赞的印象主义静物画 |
| [03:38] | reminiscent of Monet’s water lilies. | 让我想起莫奈画的池中睡莲 |
| [03:39] | Where is it? | 在哪儿呢 |
| [03:40] | Rikers Island. | 里克斯岛上 |
| [03:40] | 纽约著名监狱 | |
| [03:42] | The artist is serving two consecutive life sentences | 这位艺术家正因为恶性谋杀 |
| [03:44] | for aggravated homicide. | 被判处两项终身监禁 |
| [03:45] | I’m willing to go as high as | 我最高愿意为这幅画 |
| [03:47] | six cartons of cigarettes and a jug of toilet wine. | 出六条烟和一坛子茅房酒 |
| [03:47] | 茅房酒指监狱犯人自酿的酒 通常藏在马桶的水箱里 | |
| [03:50] | Is it a strain, | 我负担太大了 |
| [03:52] | feeling like a single dad at times? | 时不时感觉自己就像一个单亲爸爸 |
| [03:53] | Sure, but Lily’s been busting her butt at this new job. | 的确 但是莉莉正努力在新工作领域站稳脚跟 |
| [03:56] | It’s not like she’s been out there partying. | 她又不是在外面吃喝玩乐 |
| [03:58] | Man, I’m ‘faced. | 天 我有点醉了 |
| [03:59] | I ate a ton of caviar, | 我吃了一大堆鱼子酱 |
| [03:59] | 鱼子酱配香槟会有口中噼噼啪啪的响个不停的美妙感 | |
| [04:02] | but it soaked up none of the champagne. | 还是没能把我的香槟都炸出来 |
| [04:03] | -Mondays, right? -Yeah. | -这就是周一啊 -是啊 |
| [04:06] | When did you get glasses? | 你什么时候开始戴眼镜了 |
| [04:08] | Oh… | 噢 |
| [04:09] | you mean my glare reduction lunettes. | 你是说我的无敌防眩光眼镜 |
| [04:11] | Yeah. They help me discern genius from pretentious crap. | 它能帮我从自命不凡的烂货中挑出真正的天才 |
| [04:15] | Too bad you weren’t wearing those glasses | 你在买这副眼镜的时候 |
| [04:16] | when you bought those glasses. | 没有戴上这副识别眼镜 真是太可惜了 |
| [04:19] | Well, listen, baby, I-I’m just | 好了 听着 宝贝 |
| [04:20] | happy to see you. | 我很高兴见到你 |
| [04:21] | And if you’re not too tired, | 如果你不是太累的话 |
| [04:23] | maybe we could watch Woodworthy Manor tonight. | 我们今晚可以一起看伍德沃斯庄园 |
| [04:25] | I’d love to. | 可以呀 |
| [04:26] | Great! Because I’ve come up | 太好了 因为我想到了一个 |
| [04:28] | with a fun little game. | 特别好玩的小游戏 |
| [04:29] | I made figgy pudding | 我做了一些无花果布丁 |
| [04:30] | and I put it in shot glasses. | 放在小酒杯里 |
| [04:32] | And every time they say, | 每次剧中说到 |
| [04:33] | “The dowager will be less than pleased,” | “夫人会不高兴的” |
| [04:36] | you have to… | 你就得 |
| [04:37] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [04:38] | Ugh… | 呃 |
| [04:39] | Ahoy. | 啊嗬 |
| [04:41] | A seven-foot-tall cross-dressing Cambodian | 一个两米多高穿异性服装的柬埔寨人 |
| [04:43] | is throwing glitter and fish guts | 在往BQE的一个公告牌上 |
| [04:43] | B.Q.E. 连接纽约布鲁克林区和皇后区的高速公路 | |
| [04:44] | at a billboard on the B.Q.E. | 扔亮粉和鱼内脏 |
| [04:46] | So he’s some sort of conceptual painter? | 那他是某个概念艺术画家吗 |
| [04:48] | No, no, just a crazy person on the local news. | 不是 只是一个上了地方新闻的疯子 |
| [04:50] | I thought you might have a laugh. | 我以为你听了会笑呢 |
| [04:51] | You’re off the clock, relax. | 你已经下班了 别紧张 |
| [04:55] | I must own it. | 我要把这个买下来 |
| [04:56] | Aye, aye, Cap’n. | 遵命 船长大人 |
| [05:00] | Hey, did you find a Realtor to sell this place yet? | 嘿 你找到卖房子的经纪人了吗 |
| [05:03] | Robin, a Realtor’s just gonna | 罗宾 经纪人只会把这间公寓 |
| [05:06] | give it to the highest bidder. | 卖给出价最高的人 |
| [05:07] | I need this place to go to someone worthy. | 我想卖给值得拥有的人 |
| [05:10] | And I’ve made some inquiries. | 我已经做了一些调查 |
| [05:15] | Barney? | 巴尼 |
| [05:17] | My son. | 吾儿 |
| [05:19] | Barney, enough with the floating Jor-El head | 巴尼 别玩漂浮的乔•艾尔头了 |
| [05:22] | from the Fortress of Solitude in Superman, okay? | 这是超人的孤独堡垒里的 |
| [05:25] | It’s getting old. | 这太老套了 |
| [05:26] | I only use it to say really important stuff. | 我只用这个来说非常重要的事情 |
| [05:30] | Last time you used it to tell me | 上次你用这个是告诉我 |
| [05:31] | Wendy’s had introduced a spicy version of “The Baconator.” | 云狄斯新出了辣味版的培根汉堡 |
| [05:31] | Wendy’s 云狄斯 美国第二大汉堡包快餐连锁店 | |
| [05:34] | Exactly. | 就是这个意思 |
| [05:37] | And now, my son… | 好了 吾儿 |
| [05:40] | it is time for me to bestow on you… | 时辰已至 吾将赠与你 |
| [05:43] | Can we just talk face-to-face like normal people? | 我们就不能像正常人那样面对面交流吗 |
| [05:45] | Ted, just… | 泰德 你就 |
| [05:47] | just… | 配合一下 |
| [05:49] | okay? | 好吗 |
| [05:51] | My son, | 吾儿 |
| [05:53] | it is time for me to bestow on you… | 时辰已至 吾将赠与你 |
| [05:59] | Close the door. | 把门关上 |
| [06:00] | No. This is… | 不 这也 |
| [06:01] | Oh, my God, can you just be cool? | 我的天啊 你就不能好好的 |
| [06:03] | Once? Please? | 哪怕一次 求你了 |
| [06:04] | Just once? | 就这一次 |
| [06:06] | Can you just once be cool? | 配合一下会死吗 |
| [06:08] | Once? | 就一次 |
| [06:09] | Please? | 求你了 |
| [06:17] | My son… | 吾儿 |
| [06:18] | for many years | 许多年来 |
| [06:19] | this apartment has been my Fortress of Barnitude. | 这套公寓都是我巴尼超人的孤独堡垒 |
| [06:24] | But now the time has come | 但现在是时候让我 |
| [06:26] | for me to pass it on. | 把它传下去了 |
| [06:29] | Soon, this place will become | 不久 这个地方就会变成 |
| [06:32] | your “Fortress of Soli-Ted.” | 你的”泰德超人的孤独堡垒” |
| [06:35] | Barney, I wouldn’t | 巴尼 哪怕你用 |
| [06:36] | live here even if you scrubbed every inch of this place | 普瑞来 阿莫西林和圣水刷洗这里的每一个角落 |
| [06:39] | with Purell, amoxicillin and holy water. | 我也不会住进来 |
| [06:39] | Purell 普瑞来 美国洗手液品牌 | |
| [06:43] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [06:44] | But I think we can both agree, | 但我觉得我们都同意 |
| [06:46] | it would be totally awesome to see | 如果能用乔•艾尔摄像机能让我的 |
| [06:49] | my deal floating around all huge-like on the big Jor-El cam. | 那玩意儿漂浮在空中绝对是好棒的 |
| [06:51] | Hold on. | 等一下 |
| [06:53] | Now, it’s a little cold here in the Fortress, | 现在堡垒里有点冷 |
| [06:56] | so don’t judge… | 所以别因为这个 |
| [06:57] | Ted, wait. | 泰德 等等 |
| [06:58] | What did you… | 你做了什么 |
| [07:00] | That’s… okay, that’s not funny. | 你把… 好了 这样不好玩 |
| [07:02] | Ted, open the… | 泰德 开门 |
| [07:03] | Uh… walls closing in. | 呃 墙壁在向我逼近 |
| [07:06] | I can’t… can’t breathe. | 我没法呼吸了 |
| [07:09] | Must… | 必须 |
| [07:10] | show deal… | 展示那玩意 |
| [07:12] | on Jor-El cam… | 用乔•艾尔摄像机 |
| [07:14] | I… | 我… |
| [07:17] | Oh, well, guess I’m keeping this place forever, good night. | 这样看来我只好永远保留这套公寓了 晚安 |
| [07:18] | Wait a… wait a minute, that’s it? | 等等 给我等一下 这样就完了 |
| [07:20] | Ted wasn’t interested in buying your apartment, | 泰德没兴趣买你的公寓 |
| [07:22] | so you just gave up? | 你就放弃了吗 |
| [07:24] | Barney, I gave up my | 巴尼 我抛弃了自己 |
| [07:26] | beautiful two-bedroom apartment | 位于曼哈顿上西区的 |
| [07:27] | on the Upper West Side that was rent-free | 不用交房租的两室公寓 |
| [07:29] | and the landlord hand-washed all my delicates. | 房东还亲自手洗我的高档衣服 |
| [07:32] | Which is probably why it was rent-free. | 这可能是我不用交房租的原因 |
| [07:34] | The point is, | 重点是 |
| [07:36] | I need to buy all new underwear, | 我所有内衣都要重新买 |
| [07:37] | and you agreed that we would find a new place together. | 你也答应我们一起换个新地方住 |
| [07:40] | Oh, God, Barney, | 天啊 巴尼 |
| [07:42] | relationships are about trust and compromise. | 恋爱是需要互相信任和妥协的 |
| [07:45] | You can’t just… | 你不能只是 |
| [07:46] | Oh, you are so dead. | 啊 你死定了 |
| [07:47] | If I ever figure a way out of here, | 别让我找到方法出来 |
| [07:49] | I will make your life a living… | 我会让你生不如死的 |
| [07:52] | Lily and I really need this night out. | 我和莉莉真的很需要出去约个会 |
| [07:53] | A big fancy dinner and the ballet. | 丰盛精致的晚餐和芭蕾表演 |
| [07:55] | Thank you so much for babysitting. | 谢谢你能帮忙照顾孩子 |
| [07:57] | Hey, three bucks an hour, thank you. | 嘿 一小时三刀呢 谢谢你才对 |
| [08:03] | Oh, hey, baby. | 喂 宝贝 |
| [08:05] | Yeah, I’m just on my way out. | 我正要出门 |
| [08:06] | If you get there before… | 如果你早到了 |
| [08:08] | Come on, really? | 别这样 不是吧 |
| [08:11] | I’ll see you later. | 之后见 |
| [08:13] | Captain? | 船长吗 |
| [08:15] | I’m sorry, dude. But, hey, | 真遗憾 兄弟 不过 |
| [08:16] | look at it this way: | 你可以这样想 |
| [08:18] | now you don’t have to go to the ballet. | 至少你不用去看芭蕾表演了啊 |
| [08:19] | Get your head out of your ass, Ted. | 把你脑袋从菊花里拔出来使一下好吗 泰德 |
| [08:21] | There was no ballet. | 根本就没有什么芭蕾表演 |
| [08:22] | We were gonna sneak into your apartment and bang. | 我们就打算溜进你公寓来一炮 |
| [08:25] | Well, you know what might | 好吧 知道有什么可以 |
| [08:27] | take both our minds off that? | 让我们忘掉这些烦心事吗 |
| [08:29] | A little, uh… | 稍稍看一集 |
| [08:31] | Woodworthy Manor. | 伍德沃斯庄园 |
| [08:35] | No, I-I-I can’t. | 不 这不行 |
| [08:36] | I-I promised Lily | 我答应过莉莉 |
| [08:37] | that I would wait and watch it with her. | 要等着她一起看的 |
| [08:38] | And I feel like I’d be cheating on her. | 要是我先看了 就好像背叛了她一样 |
| [08:40] | Sure, sure, sure, sure, I get all that. | 好吧好吧 我懂的 |
| [08:42] | It’s just, um… | 只不过 |
| [08:44] | You know, tonight they’re gonna finally reveal | 你要知道 今晚他们终于要找出那个 |
| [08:47] | who framed the chimney sweep | 而陷害扫烟囱工说他偷了庄园主人 |
| [08:49] | for stealing Lord Stoutshire’s gooseberries. | 斯塔德夏尔的鹅莓的凶手了 |
| [08:54] | And reveal the winner of | 还要角逐出 |
| [08:55] | the local gardening competition. | 当地园艺大赛的冠军 |
| [08:57] | I don’t know how they’re going to pack | 我完全猜不透他们怎样才能 |
| [08:58] | all that action into one episode. | 把这么多剧情集中到一集里面 |
| [09:06] | Oops. | 啊哦 |
| [09:10] | No, Ted, you know | 不行啊 泰德 |
| [09:11] | -I promised Lily, I… -Shh, shh, shh. | -我答应了莉莉 -嘘 别说话 |
| [09:14] | Just let it happen. | 顺其自然吧 |
| [09:16] | Later that week, Barney came home to discover | 这周晚些时候 巴尼回家时发现 |
| [09:18] | that Robin had a little surprise waiting for him. | 罗宾给他准备了一个小惊喜 |
| [09:26] | -Mimosas? -Mm-hmm. | -含羞草吗 -是啊 |
| [09:26] | Mimosas 因为颜色像含羞草而命名的鸡尾酒 | |
| [09:28] | Freshly-baked cookie smell? | 刚烤的饼干的香味 |
| [09:31] | A middle-aged woman in a red blazer? | 还有穿红色运动衣的中年妇女 |
| [09:34] | I see what this is. | 我明白了 |
| [09:36] | You finally green-lit my orgy idea! | 你总算同意我纵酒狂欢啦 |
| [09:39] | Okay. | 真好 |
| [09:40] | It’s an open house, Barney. | 这是场家庭招待会 巴尼 |
| [09:42] | Say good-bye to your fortress. | 跟你的堡垒说再见吧 |
| [09:44] | If we weren’t about to have an orgy, | 要不是因为我们要狂欢 |
| [09:46] | I’d be so mad at you right now. | 我肯定会对你发火的 |
| [09:53] | If you’ll follow me into the bedroom, | 如果你们跟随我到卧室 |
| [09:54] | I’ll show you some beautiful woodwork. | 会看到很棒的实木家具哦 |
| [09:56] | I am way too upset right now to point out how many women | 我现在太生气 都懒得吐槽 曾有多少无知少女 |
| [09:59] | have seen some beautiful woodwork in there. | 在卧室里见过很棒的”实木家具” |
| [09:59] | 也指小鸡鸡 | |
| [10:00] | Angry self five! | 愤怒自我击掌 |
| [10:02] | Rah! | 啊 |
| [10:03] | Robin, | 罗宾 |
| [10:04] | I did not agree to this. | 我不允许你卖掉公寓 |
| [10:05] | Yes, you did. | 你必须允许 |
| [10:06] | That is why I gave up my apartment. | 我搬出我的公寓 |
| [10:08] | Not so I could live in a disease-riddled bang pad | 不是为了住进一个病菌滋生 |
| [10:11] | haunted by the ghosts of your ex-skanks. | 上门荡妇阴魂不散的淫窝 |
| [10:15] | The bathrooms are Italian marble. | 浴室是意大利大理石的哟 |
| [10:19] | Hello, old bean. | 你好啊 老兄 |
| [10:20] | Jolly good evening, isn’t it? | 今晚棒极了 对吧 |
| [10:22] | What are you doing here? | 你们在这儿干嘛 |
| [10:23] | And why do you sound like Madonna? | 而且你说话怎么跟麦当娜似的 |
| [10:25] | Uh, Robin asked us all to come here | 罗宾让我们都来转转 |
| [10:27] | and pretend that we are prospective buyers who love this apartment. | 假装我们是很喜欢这公寓的潜在买主 |
| [10:29] | And inspired by a character | 我受到伍德沃斯庄园中 |
| [10:31] | on Woodworthy Manor, I’ve decided to play | 一个角色的启发 决定扮演 |
| [10:33] | Emsbry Postlethwaite, | 埃姆斯布瑞•波斯尔思韦特 |
| [10:35] | a handsome cricket player who secretly hates his life. | 一位帅气迷人内心却厌恶自己生活的板球运动员 |
| [10:39] | You don’t have to be a cricket player. | 你没必要当什么板球运动员 |
| [10:40] | Tell that to Emsbry’s father. | 跟埃姆斯布瑞的爸爸说去吧 |
| [10:42] | Sorry! | 抱歉 |
| [10:43] | Oh… | 我来了 |
| [10:45] | I was checking out some mole people’s graffiti art | 我去看了些地铁流浪汉的涂鸦作品 |
| [10:48] | and my cape got caught on the F train. | 我的披肩还被地铁勾住了 |
| [10:50] | Oh. | 来 |
| [10:51] | Bisou bisou. | 亲亲 |
| [10:53] | Oh, what a cute baby. | 哇 好可爱的宝宝 |
| [10:55] | What’s his name? | 他叫什么名字啊 |
| [10:56] | Marvin. | 马尔文 |
| [10:57] | For my father. | 为了纪念我父亲 |
| [10:58] | Oh, that’s so sweet. | 噢 这好贴心啊 |
| [11:00] | Have you two been looking at a lot of places in this neighborhood? | 你们俩已经在这一带看很多公寓了吗 |
| [11:03] | Oh, actually they’re not… | 噢 事实上他们不是… |
| [11:04] | Yes, we have. | 是 我们看过了 |
| [11:06] | What? | 什么 |
| [11:08] | My husband Emsbry and I just love this area. | 我跟我丈夫埃姆斯布瑞爱死这一片地区了 |
| [11:12] | I’m a cricket player who secretly hates his life. | 我是一位帅气迷人内心却厌恶自己生活的板球运动员 |
| [11:15] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么啊 |
| [11:17] | Well, you were late yet again, | 鉴于你再一次迟到了 |
| [11:19] | and so I’m gonna do this little scene study with Ted. | 我决定和泰德做一次角色扮演 |
| [11:21] | Why? Because he’s there for me. | 你问为什么 因为他随时在我身边 |
| [11:25] | Pretending you’re married? | 假装你结婚了 |
| [11:27] | That’s going a little far to prove your point, isn’t it? | 这离你要证明的观点也太远了吧 |
| [11:30] | Excuse me, but I think it’s offensive to suggest | 打扰一下 但是你说同性恋情侣们结婚 |
| [11:32] | the only reason gay people get married is to prove a point. | 只是为了证明某种观点也太无礼了吧 |
| [11:35] | No, no, no, no, no. | 不×5 |
| [11:38] | I didn’t… that’s not what I… | 我不是那个意思 |
| [11:39] | Thank you, sister– somebody needs | 谢谢你 姐们 看来需要找人来给 |
| [11:41] | to get this lady’s mind a rearview mirror | 这位女士的思想安一块倒车镜 |
| [11:44] | because she is thinking in reverse. Mm-hmm. | 因为她的思维在倒退 |
| [11:49] | Hate is a four-letter word. | 恨就一个字 我只说一次 |
| [11:51] | I didn’t… I voted for… | 我没有 我投票给了… |
| [11:57] | Oh, is this part of a security system? | 噢 这是安全系统的一部分吗 |
| [11:58] | Sort of. | 算是吧 |
| [11:59] | It’s connected to the welcome mat. You see… | 它和门口的擦鞋垫是连起来的 你看 |
| [12:02] | Let’s say the young lady you’re bringing home | 假设你带回家的小妞 |
| [12:04] | is dressed for winter. | 穿的冬装 |
| [12:05] | Under those layers, | 在这个面板里面 |
| [12:06] | an unwelcome surprise could await you. | 可能有个不幸的消息等着你 |
| [12:08] | The scale with body fat calculator | 在擦鞋垫下面我藏了一个 |
| [12:10] | I’ve hidden under the welcome mat | 人体脂肪测量秤 |
| [12:12] | makes sure you never have banger’s remorse. | 可以确保我不会睡让我后悔的妞 |
| [12:15] | The Heavy Set Go | 肥妞快走 |
| [12:17] | by Stinson, patent pending. | 斯丁森出品 专利申请中 |
| [12:18] | ‘Cause there’s only one kind of chubby you want in the bedroom. | 因为卧室里只有一种丰满的东西是你想要的 |
| [12:21] | Am I right, people? | 我说的对吧 大家 |
| [12:23] | This guy knows what I’m talking about. | 这家伙知道我在说什么 |
| [12:26] | I don’t want to tell you and Emsbry how to raise your child, | 不是我想教你和埃姆斯布瑞怎么养”你们的”孩子 |
| [12:30] | but I think if you keep letting him nap, | 但如果你一直让他打盹的话 |
| [12:33] | he’s gonna be up all night. | 他会整夜睡不着的 |
| [12:34] | Funny, you sound like someone who’s been | 真是搞笑 听起来好像你最近有 |
| [12:36] | around for his bedtime lately. | 陪着他入睡一样 |
| [12:38] | Uh, can somebody get this lady a storefront | 嗯 有人能给这位女士一家店面 |
| [12:40] | ’cause she needs to mind her own business, mm-kay? | 好让她专注于自己的事情吗 |
| [12:44] | Would you stop it? | 你能歇会儿吗 |
| [12:45] | Oh, right, right, because it’s a choice. | 噢 对 对 因为这是你的抉择 |
| [12:49] | You know what’s not a choice? | 你们知道什么不用抉择吗 |
| [12:51] | Being gay for this kitchen. | 充满基情地享用这个厨房 |
| [12:54] | That came out wrong– the point is, | 打开方式有点不太对 重点是 |
| [12:56] | let’s focus on this awesome apartment. | 看看这个超赞的公寓吧 |
| [12:58] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [13:00] | Look at that fabulous plasma television. | 看看这个传说中的等离子电视吧 |
| [13:02] | My ex-husband, who never supported my career, | 我的前夫 那个从不支持我事业的家伙 |
| [13:06] | would love to watch the Vikings never win a Super Bowl | 会爱死用这个来看维京人 |
| [13:10] | in franchise history on that thing. | 在历史上从来没赢过的超级碗比赛 |
| [13:12] | -How dare you. -Don’t let her push your buttons. | -岂有此理 -别让她戳中了你的怒点 |
| [13:15] | Right. | 对 |
| [13:18] | I don’t care about football. | 我才不在意什么橄榄球赛呢 |
| [13:21] | I’m more of a… | 我更算得上是个 |
| [13:22] | Woodworthy Manor fan. | 伍德沃斯庄园剧迷 |
| [13:25] | I very much enjoyed watching it the other night. | 我非常享受那一夜看剧的美好时光 |
| [13:28] | With Emsbry. | 和埃姆斯布瑞一起 |
| [13:29] | Oh, you didn’t. | 你不会吧 |
| [13:31] | Yeah, oh, yeah. | 是 我们看了 |
| [13:32] | I know who deliberately overwatered | 我知道是谁故意水淹了 |
| [13:34] | Lady Chillsbury’s prize-winning roses. | 琪尔斯布瑞夫人那获过奖的玫瑰 |
| [13:36] | They have been building to that reveal all season, | 他们一整季都在为那个真相做铺垫 |
| [13:38] | Marshall, don’t you tell me… | 马修 你敢再往下说 |
| [13:40] | It was Parson Smallsby. | 是帕尔森•斯莫尔斯比 |
| [13:46] | Wow, great view. | 哇 风景不错 |
| [13:48] | And customizable. | 而且是可定制的哟 |
| [13:49] | Let’s say you promised a girl | 假设你承诺给一个女孩 |
| [13:50] | a surprise trip | 一场惊喜旅行 |
| [13:52] | to the most romantic place on Earth. | 到地球上最浪漫的地方 |
| [13:54] | No peeking. | 不准偷看哦 |
| [13:56] | Wow, we must’ve gone far. | 哇 我们一定到了很远的地方 |
| [13:58] | We were on your private jet for, like, six hours. | 在你的私人飞机上待了快有六个小时了 |
| [14:02] | Well, | 是啊 |
| [14:03] | You definitely weren’t on a bus to Delaware | 你一定不是戴着耳塞乘着公交 |
| [14:05] | and back wearing earplugs, I’ll tell you that much. | 来回了一趟特拉华州 我只能告诉你这么多 |
| [14:07] | And I think you’ll agree it was worth the wait | 看到眼前的美景时你一定会觉得 |
| [14:09] | once you see the view. | 一切等待都是值得的 |
| [14:11] | Et voila ma cherie. | 亲爱的 我们到啦 |
| [14:15] | Oh, my God. | 噢 我的天哪 |
| [14:18] | You flew me to Vegas? | 你带我飞到了维加斯 |
| [14:20] | It’s, um… it’s Par… | 这是 这是巴黎 |
| [14:22] | Well, hey, whatever works, whatever… | 算了 管用就行 无所谓啦 |
| [14:24] | The Room With a Screw | 风景之屋 |
| [14:27] | by Stinson, patent pending. | 斯丁森出品 专利申请中 |
| [14:29] | I know what you’re trying to do. | 我看懂你的这些把戏了 |
| [14:30] | You’re trying to drive people away. | 你就是想把这些人都吓跑 |
| [14:31] | No, I’m not– I’m just trying | 不 我才没有呢 我只是 |
| [14:33] | to show off all of its one-of-a-kind features. | 卖弄下这套公寓独一无二的特征 |
| [14:34] | See, see, there’s also, uh, Venice. | 看 看 我这儿还有 威尼斯 |
| [14:38] | Niagara Falls, | 尼亚加拉大瀑布 |
| [14:41] | African safari. | 非洲之旅 |
| [14:43] | Oh… | 哦 |
| [14:44] | and my favorite… | 还有我的最爱 |
| [14:48] | Huh? | 怎么样 |
| [14:50] | Nothing gets a girl to go from “On the fence” | 让女孩以为自己在乎的人都已化为灰烬 |
| [14:52] | to “On all fours” Faster than thinking | 没有什么比这更快的方法 |
| [14:54] | everyone she’s ever held dear is a glowing pile of ash. | 让她从”犹豫不决”转变到”坚定不移”了 |
| [14:56] | Mushroom cloud five. | 蘑菇云击掌 |
| [15:03] | I love you accent. | 我喜欢你的口音 |
| [15:06] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [15:07] | I practiced it all morning. | 我练了整整一早上了 |
| [15:10] | You are adorable. | 你真可爱 |
| [15:12] | That Marshall’s a lucky man. | 那个马修真是个幸运的男人 |
| [15:14] | Well, aren’t you ducky? | 哦 你真是招人喜欢 |
| [15:16] | Seriously if you were straight, | 说真的 如果你是直男 |
| [15:18] | I’d be all over you. | 我一定为你倾倒 |
| [15:21] | Huh. | 哼 |
| [15:23] | What’s this? | 这是什么 |
| [15:25] | Oh, God. | 哦 天呐 |
| [15:25] | Only the best thing ever. | 史上最好的东西 |
| [15:27] | Let’s say you had a wonderful night with a girl, but now | 假设你和一个女生过了愉快的一夜 |
| [15:30] | she’s turning into a bit of a morning-after pill. | 她有点像吃完避孕药一样 磨叽着不走 |
| [15:41] | See? We need to extend the chute | 看到了吧 我们要延长坡道 |
| [15:43] | and add a landing spot. | 再加一个着陆点 |
| [15:46] | And you said testing it with a dummy was a waste of time. | 你还说用假人测试是浪费时间 |
| [15:48] | No, I said “Dressing the dummy” Was a waste of time. | 不 我说的是”打扮这假人”是浪费时间 |
| [15:52] | The Escape From Bitch Mountain | 贱人山的求生通道 |
| [15:54] | by Stinson, patent pending. | 斯丁森出品 专利申请中 |
| [15:56] | He’s kidding, it’s just, you know, | 他开玩笑呢 这只是 你知道 |
| [15:57] | in case of fire. | 以防失火 |
| [15:58] | No, but I’m glad you mentioned fire. | 不是的 但是很高兴你正好提到了火 |
| [16:00] | See those smoke detectors? | 看到那些烟雾探测器了吗 |
| [16:04] | Say these words. | 念出这些话 |
| [16:06] | “I’m looking for a deeper commitment.” | “我想要更进一步的承诺” |
| [16:10] | It’s also triggered by “I’m too tired,” “Let’s snuggle,” | “我太累了””我们来抱抱吧”也会激活它 |
| [16:14] | and “I’m a week late.” | 还有”我月经晚了一周” |
| [16:15] | Barney, I’m getting wet. | 巴尼 我身上都湿了 |
| [16:17] | And that turns it off. | 说这句就能把它关掉 |
| [16:21] | Look, just stop talking. | 好吧 别说了 |
| [16:22] | We’ve made up our minds. | 我们已经做好决定了 |
| [16:24] | Oh, well, thanks for taking a look. | 哦 好吧 谢谢你们来参观 |
| [16:25] | I’ll walk you out. | 我来送你们出去 |
| [16:26] | We’ll take it. | 我们买了 |
| [16:28] | If you never get a black light, you’ll be so happy here. | 只要你们不用紫外光灯 住在这里一定会超幸福的 |
| [16:28] | 紫外光灯会照出残留”小蝌蚪”的痕迹 | |
| [16:31] | Yes, yes! | 太好了 太好了 |
| [16:38] | Trouble in paradise? | 天堂里的烦恼吗 |
| [16:38] | 《天堂里的烦恼》婚外恋电影 | |
| [16:47] | We have a child together. | 我们有个孩子 |
| [16:56] | I can’t believe you watched Woodworthy Manor without me. | 真不敢相信你居然没等我一起看伍德沃斯庄园 |
| [16:59] | I can’t believe that you’re mad at me. | 真不敢相信你居然生我的气 |
| [17:02] | I’ve been abandoned by my wife and my gay companion. | 我老婆和基友都把我抛弃了 |
| [17:05] | If I get blinded in one eye by a badminton shuttlecock, | 如果我打羽毛球时候把一只眼睛弄瞎了 |
| [17:07] | you might as well call me Lord Esterbrooke. | 那我就也成了艾斯特布鲁克庄主了 |
| [17:10] | You watched the new one without me? | 你背着我看了最新一集吗 |
| [17:11] | Betrayal stings, doesn’t it, Emsbry? | 被人背叛很不爽吧 埃姆斯布瑞 |
| [17:15] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [17:16] | Hey. Listen. | 嘿 听着 |
| [17:17] | No, me first. | 不 我先说 |
| [17:19] | I’ve been thinking | 我考虑了一下 |
| [17:20] | and I realized something. | 想明白了一些事 |
| [17:22] | The Fortress of Solitude is where Superman went to be alone. | 孤独堡垒是超人独处的地方 |
| [17:26] | And I never want to be alone again. | 我永远都不想再一个人了 |
| [17:28] | Thank you, Barney, that really… | 谢谢 巴尼 那真是 |
| [17:31] | But then I remembered in Superman II, | 然后我想起了超人第二部 |
| [17:33] | Superman gave up all his powers to be with Lois Lane, | 超人为了露易丝•莱恩放弃了他的所有能力 |
| [17:36] | and he was honestly kind of a vag after that. | 在那之后 老实说他就是个废人 |
| [17:38] | Oh, buddy, just quit while… | 哥们 能不能停一下 |
| [17:40] | Now, Superman III was | 然后 超人第三部 |
| [17:41] | a complete train wreck totally. | 简直就是一部灾难 |
| [17:42] | What’s your point? | 你想说什么 |
| [17:44] | that I love you. | 想说 我爱你 |
| [17:46] | And… | 还有 |
| [17:48] | I’m giving up my apartment for you. | 我要为你放弃我的公寓 |
| [17:50] | And that the Superman films are uneven. | 还有超人系列电影的水平参差不齐 |
| [17:56] | I really appreciate that, Barney, but… | 我真的很感动 巴尼 但是 |
| [18:00] | Congrats. You guys are getting a fantastic apartment. | 恭喜啊 你们入手了这间超赞的公寓 |
| [18:02] | I mean, I know some of the features are a little weird. | 我知道这里的一些地方有一点点奇怪 |
| [18:06] | A little? | 一点点吗 |
| [18:08] | We’re gonna rip this thing | 我们会把这里都扒光 |
| [18:09] | down to the studs. | 拆成毛坯房 |
| [18:11] | I get it. | 我明白 |
| [18:12] | But, I mean, some things might be worth saving. | 但是 我是说 还是有些值得保留的地方 |
| [18:15] | I don’t see any. No. | 我可没看出来 没有 |
| [18:17] | You don’t see any? | 你没看出来 |
| [18:20] | Sure some of the stuff in here is creepy, | 当然这里的一些东西是有些吓人 |
| [18:22] | but it’s also brilliant. | 但也非常有才啊 |
| [18:24] | I mean, a lot of geniuses were kind of pervy. | 我是说 很多天才都有些古怪 |
| [18:27] | Look at Thomas Edison | 看看托马斯•爱迪生 |
| [18:29] | why do you think that lightbulbs are boob-shaped? | 不然你以为灯泡怎么会是胸部的形状呢 |
| [18:31] | Yeah, we’re taking a wrecking ball to this place | 好吧 我们要把这个地方彻底拆掉 |
| [18:33] | and turning it into something actually fit for humans. | 建成个真正适合人类的地方 |
| [18:39] | Excuse me. | 失陪一下 |
| [18:47] | Get out! | 出去 |
| [18:48] | The Fortress of Barnitude is no longer for sale. | 巴尼超人的孤独堡垒不卖了 |
| [18:51] | Also your husband has been staring at my ass | 还有你的老公一下午一直盯着我的屁股看 |
| [18:54] | all afternoon so don’t act all high-and-mighty. | 所以别装高风亮节了 |
| [18:58] | You turned them down? | 你拒绝了他们 |
| [18:59] | Yeah. If I ask you to change too many things about yourself, | 是啊 如果我要求你改变太多 |
| [19:03] | you’re not gonna be the man I fell in love with. | 你就不是我爱上的那个人了 |
| [19:06] | Turns out, I accept and appreciate | 所以 我接受并欣赏你 |
| [19:09] | even the grossest, creepiest, most sociopathic parts of you. | 包括你最猥琐 最可怕 最反社会的阴暗面 |
| [19:15] | Sounds like somebody just wrote her vows. | 某人刚才好像已经把结婚誓言写好了哦 |
| [19:22] | It’s the Captain. | 是船长 |
| [19:25] | Ahoy. | 啊嗬 |
| [19:26] | There’s a zebra at the Central Park Zoo | 中央公园的动物园里有一匹斑马 |
| [19:28] | who’s got quite a keen hoof at photography. | 有着对摄影非常敏锐的蹄子 |
| [19:30] | Ironically, he’s great with color. Now… | 说来好笑 他竟然对颜色很在行 现在 |
| [19:32] | Captain, I’ll check it out, just not tonight. | 船长 我会去看看的 但不是今晚 |
| [19:36] | I need to spend some time with my husband. | 我需要些时间陪陪我的丈夫 |
| [19:38] | You sure? | 你确定吗 |
| [19:41] | I know it’s been tough, me working this much, | 我知道 我这样忙于工作 你挺不容易的 |
| [19:43] | and I guess I went a little overboard with the whole artsy thing. | 我估计自己对艺术家气派的追求也有点过火了 |
| [19:47] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [19:49] | The cape. | 你那披肩 |
| [19:50] | What about my cape? | 我的披肩怎么了 |
| [19:51] | I love it. | 我很喜欢 |
| [19:52] | And I… I know that you love this job. | 而且我知道 你热爱这份工作 |
| [19:54] | I should be more supportive– I just miss you. | 我应该更支持你的 我只是想你了 |
| [19:56] | I miss you, too. | 我也想你 |
| [19:58] | Hey, guys. | 嗨 伙计们 |
| [19:59] | -Hey. -Hey. | -嗨 -嗨 |
| [20:01] | You guys are all so lucky. | 你们都好幸运 |
| [20:04] | When am I gonna find something real? | 我什么时候才能找到真爱呢 |
| [20:06] | Well, Emsbry, ready to see what it’s like to be with a woman? | 埃姆斯布瑞 想不想试试和女人在一起是什么感觉 |
| [20:10] | I suppose there’s a first time for everything. | 万事总有第一次嘛 |
| [20:15] | -Go ahead. -My son. | -去吧 -吾儿 |
| [20:26] | Are you guys sure we’re gonna like this Woodworthy Manor show? | 你们确定我俩会喜欢伍德沃斯庄园吗 |
| [20:30] | Yeah, it sounds kind of boring. | 是啊 听起来有点无聊 |
| [20:33] | Kind of boring? | 有点无聊 |
| [20:34] | Grab a seat guys, but trust me, you’re only gonna need the edge. | 快点坐下吧 但相信我吧 绝对精彩得让你坐不住 |
| [20:38] | Ah-ha, all right, now, a little backstory. | 好了 先讲一段背景故事 |
| [20:42] | Lady Stoutshire has developed a serious case of croquet ankle | 斯塔德夏尔小姐的槌球及踝靴事业已经发展壮大了 |
| [20:45] | and the cook Mrs. Bootbrush can’t find enough chestnuts | 厨子布特布拉什夫人找不到足够的栗子 |
| [20:49] | for a proper St. Crispin’s Day goose. | 来喂圣克里斯宾节的鹅 |
| [20:52] | Let’s watch. | 一起看吧 |
| [21:04] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [21:06] | My wrist is broken. | 我手腕摔坏了 |
| [21:07] | -Worth it. -Ow. | -那也值了 -嗷 |