| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Kids, this is the story of the night | 孩子们 故事发生在巴尼的生活 |
| [00:04] | Barney’s life completely fell apart. | 完完全全的分崩离析的那天晚上 |
| [00:06] | My life is finally perfect, | 我的生活终于完美了 |
| [00:06] | 六小时前 | |
| [00:08] | and that is never going to change. | 而且再也不会变了 |
| [00:10] | Fired up for dinner with my mom tonight? | 准备好今晚跟我妈妈吃饭了吗 |
| [00:12] | Yeah. To help streamline the rest of our lives, | 这样吧 为了让我们今后的生活更有效率 |
| [00:14] | you can always assume my answer to that question is no. | 你可以一直默认我对这个问题的答案是否定的 |
| [00:16] | -W… -I’m pretty nervous. | -这… -我就是挺紧张的 |
| [00:18] | Nervous? Why? It’s just gonna be two hours | 紧张 有什么好紧张的 不就是两个小时的 |
| [00:21] | of “I love Barney the most.” “No, I love Barney the most.” | “我最爱巴尼了” “不 我才最爱巴尼呢” |
| [00:24] | You’re right. I may not even get a chance to talk. | 你说的没错 那我可能连话都插不上 |
| [00:26] | But I’m still… | 但我还是… |
| [00:27] | I-I don’t know. I’m worried | 我不知道 我只是担心 |
| [00:29] | she won’t think I’m good enough to be engaged | 她会觉得我没那么好 |
| [00:30] | to her precious little Love-Love. | 配不上跟她的小可爱订婚 |
| [00:32] | Okay, first of all, it’s “Wuv-Wuv.” | 好吧 首先 应该是”小口耐” |
| [00:35] | And second, | 其次 |
| [00:36] | don’t worry. | 就放一百个心吧 |
| [00:37] | I’m just gonna drop off our catering deposit, | 我先去把婚宴承办人的定金交了 |
| [00:39] | and then I will be there for you. Mm. | 然后就来陪你 亲一下 |
| [00:40] | Okay, well, please don’t be late. | 好吧 千万别来晚了 |
| [00:42] | I am counting on you tonight. | 今晚我就指望你了 |
| [00:43] | And be careful– that’s 5,000 bucks in there. | 还有小心点 那里面可是五千块钱呢 |
| [00:45] | Uh, I think I’ll be okay walking four blocks here | 我觉得我在上东区就走上四个街区 |
| [00:49] | on the Upper East Side. | 是完全没有问题的 |
| [00:57] | Please, I swear I never talked to the North Koreans! | 求你们了 我发誓我没跟北朝鲜人说过话 |
| [01:00] | Unless you are the North Koreans, in which case | 除非你们就是北朝鲜人 这样的话 |
| [01:01] | I never talked to the South Koreans! | 我就从来没跟南朝鲜的人说过话 |
| [01:02] | Barney Stinson, | 巴尼•斯丁森 |
| [01:04] | you are being kidnapped. | 你被绑架了 |
| [01:06] | For your surprise bachelor party! | 绑你去惊喜单身派对 |
| [01:24] | A kidnapping. | 绑架是吧 |
| [01:26] | Respect. | 不错不错 |
| [01:27] | I was secretly worried | 我私下里还担心 |
| [01:28] | you might not be able to pull off my bachelor party. | 你们俩搞定不了我的单身派对呢 |
| [01:31] | Yeah, it wasn’t that secret. | 少来 哪有私底下 |
| [01:33] | You two? Planning my bachelor party? | 就你们俩 计划我的单身派对 |
| [01:33] | 三周前 | |
| [01:35] | Look, you seem like nice kids. | 听着 你们真是乖娃娃 |
| [01:38] | But this is a sacred event, | 但这是件庄严神圣的大事 |
| [01:40] | a man’s rite of passage with his bros. | 一个男人跟他的兄弟们一起度过的仪式 |
| [01:42] | His… bro mitzvah! | 他的…兄弟受诫礼 |
| [01:45] | You didn’t just think of that. | 这才不是你刚灵机一动想出来的 |
| [01:46] | You’ve been saying it for months every… | 你这几个月就一直在念叨… |
| [01:47] | But here’s my dilemma: | 但我也有我的难处 |
| [01:49] | my average night is like an average guy’s bachelor party. | 平常人的单身派对 对我来说也就是平常的夜生活 |
| [01:51] | So, no offense, but if you two plan it, | 所以 无意冒犯 但是如果你俩来计划 |
| [01:53] | it’s gonna be ordi– why wait for it?– nary. | 这也就会是 平…凭什么要等一下..了个常 |
| [01:56] | Ordinary. | 平常 |
| [01:57] | I can help. | 我可以帮忙 |
| [01:58] | You? | 就你 |
| [02:00] | Look, you seem like a nice kid, | 听好 你看起来也算蛮会倒腾的 |
| [02:01] | but bros’ fiancées | 但是兄弟的未婚妻 |
| [02:02] | cannot plan bachelor parties. | 不能参与计划单身派对 |
| [02:04] | Sorry. You two are on your own. | 不好意思 你俩自己搞定 |
| [02:05] | And you will disappoint me. | 你们一定会让我失望的 |
| [02:08] | But make it great, okay? | 但尽量弄好点 行吧 |
| [02:10] | But this is a strong start. | 这个开头很带劲啊 |
| [02:13] | The students have become… | 这些学生们 已然成为 |
| [02:15] | the intermediate students. | 中级学生了 |
| [02:17] | I just have to make one call. | 我先打个电话 |
| [02:22] | Hello. | 喂 |
| [02:23] | Robin, great news! | 罗宾 好消息 |
| [02:24] | I’ve been kidnapped for a surprise bachelor party | 我被绑去参加一个惊喜单身派对去了 |
| [02:26] | so I won’t be there at all! | 所以我来不了了 |
| [02:28] | What? Barney, I-I can’t do dinner with your mom alone. | 什么 巴尼 我做不到就我一人陪你妈妈吃饭啊 |
| [02:31] | Okay, I’ll call her, make up an excuse and cancel. | 好吧 我给她打个电话 找个借口把它取消了 |
| [02:33] | And don’t worry, I’ll take all the blame. | 别担心 有事我全扛着 |
| [02:35] | Hold on. | 等会 |
| [02:38] | Hi, Wuv-Wuv. | 嗨 小口耐 |
| [02:39] | Hi, Momsies. | 嗨 麻麻 |
| [02:40] | I forgot, I’m mentoring an underprivileged child tonight, | 我都忘了 我今晚要给一个失学儿童补课呢 |
| [02:43] | and Robin can’t stand the idea of dinner with you by herself, | 罗宾又受不了就她一个人陪你吃饭 |
| [02:47] | so we’re not gonna be able to… | 所以我们就不能… |
| [02:49] | Don’t bother. She’s already here. | 不用麻烦了 她都已经到了 |
| [02:50] | Hold on. | 等会 |
| [02:52] | Robin? Too late. She’s already there. | 罗宾 太晚了 她已经到了 |
| [02:55] | Barney, don’t… | 巴尼 别… |
| [02:56] | Robin can’t stand the idea of dinner with me? | 罗宾受不了一个人陪我吃饭吗 |
| [02:59] | Great! We’re all set then. | 太好了 那我们都说好了 |
| [03:00] | Don’t you leave me alone with her. I told you… | 别让我一个人陪她 我跟你说过… |
| [03:02] | That problem is solved. | 问题解决 |
| [03:05] | So what’s the plan? | 现在你们什么计划 |
| [03:07] | Well, you know the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City? | 好吧 你知道大西洋城的泰姬陵赌场吗 |
| [03:09] | Yeah. | 知道 |
| [03:11] | You know the secret penthouse | 你知道大西洋城的泰姬陵赌场的楼顶 |
| [03:13] | in the top of the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City? | 有一套秘密豪华套房吗 |
| [03:15] | Yeah! | 知道 |
| [03:18] | Boom! There it is. | 看呐 就在那儿 |
| [03:19] | Visible from our window. | 从我们的窗户可以看见 |
| [03:21] | In the distance. | 就是有点距离 |
| [03:24] | Behind the refinery. | 在炼油厂后面 |
| [03:25] | Okay, you can’t quite see it. | 好吧 基本上看不见 |
| [03:26] | Why are we outside Atlantic City? | 为什么我们就偏偏在大西洋城外围啊 |
| [03:29] | Well, we thought it was best, | 呃 我们觉得这样才能不负恩泽 |
| [03:31] | what with your weakness for games of chance. | 因为你玩机会博弈那类游戏真真是极弱的 |
| [03:34] | Kids, Barney was addicted | 孩子们 巴尼痴迷于 |
| [03:35] | to one Chinese gambling game | 一种中国的赌博游戏 |
| [03:35] | 这个游戏在S02E08出现过 | |
| [03:37] | that was, well, sort of complicated. | 那游戏 呃 有点复杂 |
| [03:40] | But don’t worry. | 不过别担心 |
| [03:41] | Back when you were engaged to Quinn, | 你早在和昆茵订婚那会儿 |
| [03:43] | you told us everything you wanted for tonight. | 就告诉过我们你今晚想要什么了 |
| [03:45] | A bachelor party is a man’s… | 单身派对是一个男人的 |
| [03:45] | 十个月前 | |
| [03:48] | bro mitzvah! | 兄弟受诫礼 |
| [03:51] | Did you just think of that? | 你刚瞎掰出来的吗 |
| [03:53] | Totally! We can wear… | 正是如此 我们可以戴上 |
| [03:55] | bro-mulkes… | 黑色小哥帽 |
| [03:57] | spin the bro-del… | 转个兄贵小陀螺 |
| [04:01] | and consult the wisdom of the Bro-rah. | 还要聆听伟大的兄弟卷轴中的智慧 |
| [04:06] | Written in… He-bro. | 用希哥来文写的 |
| [04:10] | Not at all bro-ffensive. | 哥们真是一点也不冒犯呢 |
| [04:12] | Ooh, ooh! Couple other ideas– and I’m just spitballing here– | 对了对了 还有些别的主意呢 我就全一股脑写上去了 |
| [04:15] | so take ’em or leave ’em. | 爱要要 不要拉倒 |
| [04:16] | Booze, duh; cigars, duh; strippers, duh… | 美酒 不用说 雪茄 少不了 脱衣舞娘 必须有 |
| [04:19] | Ooh! Things should get so crazy that at some point | 对了 既然我们迟早会玩过头 |
| [04:21] | we should fear for our lives. | 某种程度上我们还该敬畏生命 |
| [04:22] | Oh, we’ll fear for our lives, all right. | 我们一定会敬畏生命的 |
| [04:25] | When we watch Al Gore’s An Inconvenient Truth! | 那就一起来看艾尔•戈尔的《难以忽视的真相》吧 |
| [04:29] | Yeah. We’re gonna pound a beer | 好啊 我们可以玩每听到一次 |
| [04:30] | every time we hear the word “Catastrophic” | “灾难性”这个词 就吹掉一瓶啤酒的游戏呢 |
| [04:33] | Oh! | 哦 |
| [04:35] | Could that be… | 会不会是 |
| [04:37] | the next item on your list? | 你清单上的下一条项目呢 |
| [04:40] | Mind-blowing entertainment, | 爽翻天的视听盛宴 |
| [04:42] | like a naked fire show or a naked magic show. | 比如裸体火舞或者裸体魔术之类的 |
| [04:46] | There’s a good chance our engagement | 我们的婚约很有可能 |
| [04:47] | doesn’t work out, isn’t there? | 会告吹 不是吗 |
| [04:48] | 双关 “暂时不会” | |
| [04:48] | Not now, honey. | 不谈这个啊 亲爱的 |
| [04:49] | Or a naked contortionist! | 又或者是裸体柔术 |
| [04:51] | Or… A balloon contortionist! | 或者是 气球柔术 |
| [04:58] | Balloons. | 气球 |
| [05:00] | Not the inflatable, round, squishy pouches | 不是我今晚想看见的那种 |
| [05:02] | I was hoping to see tonight. | 充气的 圆圆的 黏糊糊的小气球 |
| [05:05] | Hold on. | 等一下 |
| [05:06] | I told you no clown. | 我跟你说了不要叫小丑 |
| [05:08] | Well, you didn’t like the bubble guy either. | 但你也不喜欢那个吹泡泡的啊 |
| [05:11] | Hey, Robin. | 好啊 罗宾 |
| [05:12] | Did you tell your mother | 你是不是跟你妈妈说 |
| [05:13] | I’m a virgin? | 我是处女啊 |
| [05:14] | What? Why would you think that? | 什么 你为什么会这么想 |
| [05:17] | Save yourself room for dessert. Mmm. | 留着点肚子吃甜点 |
| [05:19] | And I hear you excel at saving yourself. | 据说你在自我保留方面极其突出呢 |
| [05:24] | You are so funny. | 你太逗了 |
| [05:26] | What’s gotten into you? | 是不是什么东西上身了 |
| [05:27] | Oh, that’s right, nothing ever. | 哦 没错 从来没有过 |
| [05:32] | You may be nervous | 你可能会对 |
| [05:34] | as to what goes where on your wedding night. | 新婚夜将要发生的事情感到很紧张 |
| [05:36] | It’s really simple. | 很简单的 |
| [05:38] | Let me show you. | 我给你演示一下 |
| [05:42] | Let’s start with the fundamentals. | 我们从最基本的姿势开始学吧 |
| [05:46] | Why would you tell her I’m a virgin? | 你为什么告诉她我是处女 |
| [05:48] | I panicked. | 我慌了嘛 |
| [05:49] | Look, I really want her to like you, | 就是 我真心希望她会喜欢你 |
| [05:50] | so just go with it, okay? Okay! | 就忍受一下吧 好吗 好的 |
| [05:52] | Listen, Wuv-Wuv, you better get your ass back… | 听着 小口耐 你最好立刻马上滚回… |
| [05:56] | Another guest? | 又有人来了呀 |
| [05:58] | Who could this be? | 会是谁呢 |
| [06:01] | Why, it’s Lily! | 哇 是莉莉 |
| [06:02] | And she’s here to deliver | 她是来满足 |
| [06:03] | one of your requests! | 你的一个要求的 |
| [06:04] | Oh, thank you, Marshall. | 哦 谢谢 马修 |
| [06:06] | Oh, not that one. | 哦 不是这个要求 |
| [06:08] | An appearance by my all-time idol, | 见到我一直以来的偶像 |
| [06:10] | the Karate Kid! | 龙威小子 |
| [06:13] | The Karate Kid was an uplifting ’80s classic | 《龙威小子》是80年代一部振奋人心的经典电影 |
| [06:15] | about a teen, played by Ralph Macchio, | 讲的是拉尔夫•马奇奥扮演的一个少年的故事 |
| [06:17] | who defeats the local jerk, played by William Zabka. | 他打败了威廉•扎布卡饰演的地头蛇 |
| [06:20] | At least, that’s how most people saw it. | 至少大部分人是这么认为的 |
| [06:22] | Here he is, just as hot | 他来了 还是和以前一样帅 |
| [06:24] | as when his Tiger Beat photo spread gave a young girl | 正如同当年他的《老虎队》杂志照给了一个年轻姑娘 |
| [06:28] | the courage to explore | 十足的勇气去探索 |
| [06:29] | the suddenly unfamiliar topography of her changing body… | 自己那突然变得凹凸有致的身体 |
| [06:34] | the Karate Kid! | 龙威小子 |
| [06:37] | Hey, Barney. It’s Ralph. | 嘿 巴尼 我是拉尔夫 |
| [06:38] | Listen, it’s always flattering… | 一直以来 我十分荣幸… |
| [06:40] | No! | 不 |
| [06:42] | I hate Ralph Macchio! | 我讨厌拉尔夫•马奇奥 |
| [06:43] | I hate him, hate him, hate him! | 我讨厌他 讨厌他 讨厌他 |
| [06:46] | He is not the Karate Kid! | 他才不是什么龙威小子 |
| [06:48] | The Karate Kid was William Zabka, | 威廉•扎布卡才是龙威小子 |
| [06:50] | star pupil of the Cobra Kai Dojo, | 眼镜蛇道馆的明星学员 |
| [06:53] | who this monster | 这头禽兽 |
| [06:54] | defeated with a cheap, illegal head-kick | 用一记卑鄙的 违规的高踢腿击败了他 |
| [06:57] | in the most tragically haunting film ending of all time. | 成就了电影史上最让人怨念的悲剧结局 |
| [07:03] | Oh, see, I thought you meant fun-crazy. | 哦 懂了 我还以为你说他是有趣的那种疯子呢 |
| [07:06] | Shut it, Ralph Macchio. | 闭嘴 拉尔夫•马奇奥 |
| [07:07] | Why don’t you go have a party with Luke Skywalker | 你干嘛不去找卢克•天行者 |
| [07:07] | 巴尼对电影正反派总有自己独到的认知 | |
| [07:09] | and Harry Potter and War Horse and all the other movie bad guys | 哈利•波特还有战马之类的其他电影大反派们开派对 |
| [07:13] | and stop ruining mine! | 别来毁我的派对 |
| [07:16] | This night has been catastrophic. | 真是灾难性的一晚 |
| [07:19] | “Catastrophic”! Everybody pound. | 灾难性 大家吹瓶 |
| [07:22] | Sorry, bro. | 对不起 兄弟 |
| [07:23] | I’m staying. | 我留下了 |
| [07:24] | If this is anything | 如果这 |
| [07:26] | like my bachelor party– strippers, booze, | 像我的单身派对一样 脱衣舞娘 美酒 |
| [07:27] | definitely no hand stuff– wink-wink– | 绝对不做手活儿 你懂的 |
| [07:29] | it is gonna be in– wait for it– credible. | 这将会变得不可…等一下…思议 |
| [07:33] | Incredible! | 不可思议 |
| [07:34] | Wow. | 哇 |
| [07:34] | You guys are actually a lot alike. | 你们俩还真是挺像的 |
| [07:36] | You take that back, sir! | 你最好把话收回去 先生 |
| [07:37] | I am nothing like Ralph Macchio! | 我一点都不像拉尔夫•马奇奥 |
| [07:41] | I mean, did you guys even get a stripper? | 我说 你们到底有没有去请脱衣舞娘啊 |
| [07:44] | Bro. | 兄弟 |
| [07:45] | Bro. | 兄弟 |
| [07:46] | Of course we got a stripper. | 我们当然请脱衣舞娘了 |
| [07:48] | Do we look like the kind of dweebs | 我们难道看起来像那种傻到 |
| [07:50] | who wouldn’t get a stripper? | 连脱衣舞娘都不请的傻帽吗 |
| [07:54] | And as the saying goes, | 就像谚语里说的一样 |
| [07:55] | what happens in the sensibly-priced | 在大西洋城外面的平价商务旅馆 |
| [07:55] | 改编自 在维加斯发生的一切就留在维加斯里 | |
| [07:57] | business hotel outside Atlantic City stays | 里发生的事情就留在 |
| [07:59] | in the sensibly-priced business hotel outside Atlantic City. | 大西洋城外面的平价商务旅馆里 |
| [08:04] | Who is it? | 是谁 |
| [08:05] | Police. We got a noise complaint from… | 警察 我们接到了一个噪声扰民举报… |
| [08:07] | Oh, who am I kidding? I can tell it’s dead in there. | 噢 我在骗谁呢 这里都死气沉沉的 |
| [08:10] | I’m the stripper! | 我是脱衣舞娘 |
| [08:14] | Barney? | 巴尼 |
| [08:16] | Quinn? | 昆茵 |
| [08:24] | This is your bachelor party? You’re engaged again, | 这是你的单身派对吗 你又订婚了吗 |
| [08:27] | less than a year after we broke up? | 我们分手还不到一年啊 |
| [08:29] | Is it Robin? | 是和罗宾吗 |
| [08:31] | Now, hold on. | 等会儿 |
| [08:32] | You’re not the only one with questions here. | 你不是唯一的一个有这么多问题想问的 |
| [08:35] | You didn’t vet the stripper?! | 你们连脱衣舞娘的底细都不摸清吗 |
| [08:39] | Well, I’m glad you’re so happy. | 好吧 看到你幸福我很开心 |
| [08:40] | After we broke up, I had to move out of the city, | 我们分手以后 我不得不搬出纽约 |
| [08:42] | my car got totaled, and I had to go back | 我的车也被毁掉了 我只好重操旧业 |
| [08:44] | to stripping just to pay rent. | 继续当脱衣舞娘来付房租 |
| [08:46] | It’s like everywhere I look, my life is a dead-end. | 举目四望 我的人生都已经无路可走了 |
| [08:49] | Wow. | 哇 |
| [08:51] | I am… I’m so sorry, Quinn. | 我很…我很抱歉 昆茵 |
| [08:55] | So, how does this work? | 那 你想怎么样 |
| [08:56] | Do you give me a private show, or does everyone…? | 是给我私人演出呢 还是其他人也… |
| [08:58] | I am not stripping for you. | 我不会为你跳脱衣舞的 |
| [09:01] | I was promised boobs. | 你们保证我会有咪咪看的 |
| [09:02] | Oh, Ralph, if you want, I can… | 噢 拉尔夫 如果你想的话 我可以… |
| [09:04] | Lily. | 莉莉 |
| [09:05] | Is that the Karate Kid? | 那是龙威小子吗 |
| [09:06] | Yes! Yes! Yes! | 是 是 是 |
| [09:07] | No! | 不是 |
| [09:08] | He’s a lot like Barney, huh? | 他还真挺像巴尼的 是吧 |
| [09:09] | You take that back, madam. | 你最好把这话收回去 女士 |
| [09:10] | I am nothing like Ralph Macchio! | 我一点都不像拉尔夫•马奇奥 |
| [09:13] | Okay, okay. | 好 好 |
| [09:14] | I’ll tell you what. | 这样吧 |
| [09:15] | I am going to strip for everyone here | 我要为在场的每一个人表演脱衣舞 |
| [09:18] | except Barney. | 巴尼除外 |
| [09:20] | And I’m gonna make it dirty. | 我会跳的相当淫荡的 |
| [09:22] | Yeah, um, I’m the bachelor. | 搞清楚状况 我是单身派对的主角 |
| [09:25] | Kind of no stripping without the lap of honor. | 新郎的首席大腿怎么能不在场呢 |
| [09:28] | Back me up, bros. | 帮我说几句啊 兄弟们 |
| [09:36] | Hey, Robin. | 嘿 罗宾 |
| [09:38] | Hey, sweetie, having fun at your bachelor party? | 嘿 亲爱的 在你的单身派对上玩得开心吗 |
| [09:40] | -No. -Good, ’cause my night’s been hell! | -不开心 -太好了 我在这里简直是生不如死 |
| [09:43] | And that’s the inverted chimney sweep, | 这就是倒扫烟囱式 |
| [09:45] | the last of the 17 basic sexual positions. | 十七种基本爱爱姿势的最后一种 |
| [09:48] | Now, bondage… | 现在 捆绑… |
| [09:49] | Stop! I’m not a virgin! | 停 我根本不是处女 |
| [09:52] | My napkin ring has seen plenty of breadsticks. | 我的餐巾环已经接待过无数的面包条了 |
| [09:54] | And one baguette. | 还有一根法式长棍面包 |
| [09:56] | I dated a center for the Knicks. | 我和尼克斯队的一个中锋约会过 |
| [09:58] | Oh, thank God you’re not a prude. | 谢天谢地你不是老处女 |
| [10:00] | Now we can really talk. | 我们终于可以说人话了 |
| [10:03] | Four cosmos, pronto! | 来四杯科斯莫葡萄酒 快点 |
| [10:05] | Now she’s drunk, | 现在她喝醉了 |
| [10:06] | holding up a napkin ring and three breadsticks, | 正抓着一个餐巾环和三个面包棍 |
| [10:08] | and talking about her night with Crosby, Stills and Nash. | 大谈特谈她大战克罗斯比 斯蒂尔和纳什的那一夜 |
| [10:08] | 克罗斯比 斯蒂尔和纳什是一个乐队 | |
| [10:11] | Waiter, can I have another breadstick? | 服务员 可以给我再来一条面包吗 |
| [10:13] | And Young. | 还有杨 |
| [10:13] | 乐队全称是Crosby, Stills and Nash (and Young) | |
| [10:14] | Please come back. | 你回来好吗 |
| [10:16] | Okay. | 好 |
| [10:18] | I’ll be there soon. | 我很快就到 |
| [10:20] | Real nice. So beautiful. | 相当漂亮 非常美妙 |
| [10:22] | I think we really did it. I think we did it, you know? | 我觉得我们做到啦 我们真的做到啦 是吧 |
| [10:23] | You didn’t miss a thing. | 你啥也没错过哈 |
| [10:25] | -Oh, Quinn? -Yeah? | -噢 昆茵 -怎么啦 |
| [10:27] | You got a little… something. | 你那里沾了…一点东西 |
| [10:30] | Oh! Oh. | 噢 哦 |
| [10:36] | Let’s head back, guys. | 咱们调头回去吧 |
| [10:37] | This night has been completely half-assed. | 这一晚上从头到尾都是低能 |
| [10:40] | You obviously missed the strip show. | 你显然错过了脱衣舞表演 |
| [10:43] | Ted, this was my bachelor party. | 泰德 这可是我的单身派对 |
| [10:45] | A man only gets two or three of these in his lifetime. | 一个人一生中就那么两三次 |
| [10:49] | And this is all you do for me? | 你就是这么对我的吗 |
| [10:51] | That’s it, I’m calling it. | 够了 就此结束吧 |
| [10:53] | Who needs a ride back to the city? | 谁需要搭便车回纽约 |
| [10:57] | Oh. | 噢 |
| [10:58] | Oh, guys, wait, hold on, hold on. | 噢 大伙儿 等下 先等下 |
| [11:01] | Drinking. | 喝酒 |
| [11:03] | A shot. | 一口闷 |
| [11:06] | Shooting. | 射击 |
| [11:07] | A gun. | 枪 |
| [11:09] | Shot, gun. | 枪击 |
| [11:11] | Shotgun? | 你要副驾驶位吗 |
| [11:13] | Man, it’s crowded in here. | 天 真是挤死了 |
| [11:15] | I know, it’s like a clown car. | 没错 就跟坐在小丑车里面似的 |
| [11:15] | 小丑的车子通常很小很拥挤 | |
| [11:18] | Well, I can make some room by grinding on Ralph’s lap. | 如果我磨在拉尔夫的大腿上 倒是可以腾出些地方 |
| [11:20] | sitting! | 坐在 |
| [11:21] | I-I meant, I meant sitting. | 我 我是说 坐在 |
| [11:22] | This is the worst bachelor party ever. | 这简直是史上最烂的单身派对 |
| [11:25] | Man, my bachelor party was incr– wait for it– | 哦 我的单身派对简直是天…等一下… |
| [11:29] | and I hope you’re hungry, | 你们最好是饿了 |
| [11:31] | ’cause the second half of this word is– edible! | 因为这个词的后一半是…菜啊 |
| [11:34] | Incredible! | 天才啊 |
| [11:35] | Self-shake. | 自我握手 |
| [11:39] | You take that back, clown. | 你快把你说的咽回去 小丑 |
| [11:41] | I am nothing like Ralph Macchio! | 我跟拉尔夫•马奇奥完全是两派 |
| [11:43] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [11:44] | You’ve got more in common with the clown, | 你和小丑的共同点还多些呢 |
| [11:45] | except his suit’s more expensive. | 只不过他那套衣服比你的贵些 |
| [11:47] | Hey, yo! | 嘿呦 |
| [11:49] | I mean, what kind of loser | 我是说 哪个怂货会在 |
| [11:50] | has his bachelor party ten yards from A.C. | 离亚特拉大城不远的地方办单身派对 |
| [11:52] | and doesn’t even gamble? | 却没去赌一把 |
| [12:01] | Oh. Oh, sorry. | 哦 不好意思 |
| [12:02] | Sorry. Sorry. | 对不起啊 不是故意的啊 |
| [12:05] | Sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [12:07] | Oh… oh, wait. | 哦 等一下 |
| [12:08] | Just a little more. | 再来一小下 |
| [12:09] | Okay, sorry. | 好啦 对不起啦 |
| [12:11] | Okay. | 好啦 |
| [12:13] | 金龙翻来 哩个系 | |
| [12:15] | bro mitzvah! | 兄弟受诫礼 |
| [12:18] | Kids, I’ll skip over the gambling. | 孩子们 赌博的细节就不详细说了 |
| [12:20] | Like I said, it was a complicated game. | 跟我之前提到过的一样 这规则十分繁琐 |
| [12:22] | Although your old man did pick it up pretty quickly. | 不过你们老爹倒是很快就搞懂规则了 |
| [12:27] | Hey! | 嘿 |
| [12:28] | You just won 300 bucks! | 你一下就赢了300刀啊 |
| [12:30] | I just lost $5,000. | 我一下就输了5000刀 |
| [12:32] | Oh, right. ‘Cause the chicken. | 哦 对 因为是只鸡 |
| [12:34] | Yep, that-that’s $5,000, yeah. | 没错 这样就是5000刀 |
| [12:38] | See, I’m laughing | 你看 我笑是因为 |
| [12:39] | because you couldn’t see me take my top off, | 你没能领略我脱去上装的风采 |
| [12:41] | -but I just saw you lose your shirt. -Hey-yo! | -我却能目睹你把衬衣都输掉了的惨样 -嘿呦 |
| [12:44] | We have to go back. | 咱该回去了 |
| [12:45] | Loser! Sorry, that was a real sneeze. | 怂货 对不起 刚才真的打了个喷嚏 |
| [12:47] | Might have made you miss what I was saying. | 你们怕是没听清我刚说什么吧 |
| [12:50] | Loser! | 怂货 |
| [12:53] | We’re not going anywhere. | 我们哪都不去了 |
| [12:54] | I can still make this night legendary. | 我还有机会力挽狂澜让今晚变成传奇 |
| [12:57] | Uh, uh… | 啊 啊 |
| [13:01] | Oh, oh. | 哦哦 |
| [13:03] | Okay, I got some credit. | 好 我赊到钱了 |
| [13:06] | I just… mm… | 我只需要 呃 |
| [13:08] | Marshall, stand over there for good luck? | 马修 站那边去给我些好运 |
| [13:09] | Oh, sure. | 哦 没问题 |
| [13:15] | Okay, okay. | 好的 好的 |
| [13:17] | 一 | |
| [13:18] | 二 | |
| [13:19] | 三 | |
| [13:20] | 四 | |
| [13:24] | Oh! Oh! | 哦 哦 |
| [13:27] | You crazy son of a bitch, you did it! | 你这个狗娘养的 你成功啦 |
| [13:30] | I just lost $80,000. | 我刚输了八万刀 |
| [13:33] | Oh, right, right, yeah. ‘Cause the black jelly bean. | 哦 对对 没错 因为那个黑色软糖 |
| [13:34] | That-That’s $80,000. He’s right. | 那就是八万刀 他说的没错 |
| [13:37] | You know, Ralph, | 告诉你哦 拉尔夫 |
| [13:40] | Earlier at the salon,I waxed on,then waxed off | 之前我去了沙龙 身上涂满蜜蜡 然后统统都刮掉了 |
| [13:44] | Everywhere. | 一丝不剩 |
| [13:46] | Uh, listen, lady, your husband is, like… | 呃 听着 女士 你的老公就在… |
| [13:49] | Hey, where is your husband? | 嘿 你老公哪去了 |
| [13:51] | Marshall? | 马修 |
| [13:52] | Where’s Marshall?! | 马修哪去了 |
| [13:54] | Okay, Lily, don’t overreact, but… | 好吧 莉莉 别反应过激哦 其实呢 |
| [13:59] | 你有乜嘢俾我 | |
| [13:59] | 我可以信任你 但是你要给我个抵押品 | |
| [14:02] | Okay, I got some credit. | 好啦 他们又赊了点给我 |
| [14:04] | Marshall, stand over there for good luck? | 马修 站那边去给我些好运 |
| [14:06] | Oh, sure. | 哦 没问题 |
| [14:10] | 给金龙八万块的筹码 | |
| [14:12] | You sold my husband?! | 你把我老公卖掉了吗 |
| [14:14] | Lily, can you be more like the Chinese mobster | 莉莉 你能不能多学学中国黑帮 |
| [14:16] | and give me some credit? | 给我也放个高利贷啊 |
| [14:18] | I’m going back for Marshall; I just need to get some money. | 我会去赎马修回来的 只是需要弄些钱 |
| [14:21] | You have nothing to worry about; these are the “Good” Mobsters. | 完全用不着担心 他们是”好的”黑帮 |
| [14:24] | Wow, what kind of bozo does that to a friend? | 哇哦 什么样的跳梁小丑会这样对待朋友 |
| [14:24] | bozo也有混蛋的意思 通常用来骂白人 | |
| [14:27] | Shut it, Ralph Macchio! | 闭嘴 拉尔夫•马奇奥 |
| [14:29] | No, you shut it! | 不 你才闭嘴 |
| [14:30] | Ralph Macchio’s right, you are a bozo. | 拉尔夫•马奇奥说的没错 你就是个跳梁小丑 |
| [14:34] | Um, I think they prefer “People of bright color.” | 呃 我觉得他们的意思是”浅色人种” |
| [14:34] | 昆茵也是金发白人 | |
| [14:36] | You know what a bachelor party’s about? | 你知道单身派对的意义何在吗 |
| [14:38] | Hanging out with your friends and having a good time. | 就在于和你的朋友在一起玩的尽兴 |
| [14:40] | But you only care about the good time, not the friends. | 但是只在乎自己尽兴 把朋友放一边去了 |
| [14:43] | So you know what? | 所以说你给我听好了 |
| [14:44] | I’m-I’m done caring about you then. | 我也不再关心你了 |
| [14:47] | I’m out of here. | 我走了 |
| [14:48] | Ted… | 泰德 |
| [14:51] | Ted, Ted, I have… | 泰德 泰德 我刚… |
| [14:53] | I just tore your mom away from a living version | 我刚刚好不容易摆脱掉 你那尼克•诺尔特的正面照 |
| [14:53] | “尼克•诺尔特的正面照”美国明星烂醉被捕照片 形容烂醉如泥 | |
| [14:56] | of a Nick Nolte mug shot and put her in a cab home. | 活物版的老娘 然后叫了辆车送他回家 |
| [14:59] | Thank you for abandoning me | 我谢谢你在我 |
| [15:01] | on what has been one of the worst nights of my life. | 人生中最糟糕的夜晚 抛弃了我 |
| [15:03] | So, it’s my usual fee, plus I always charge | 好的 你知道我的价码 不过我会因为 |
| [15:06] | an extra hundred for girl-on-clown action. | 小丑蹭酥胸的环节多要一百刀 |
| [15:08] | What the hell is she doing here? | 她在这干什么呢 |
| [15:10] | Robin, I swear, nothing happened. | 罗宾 我发誓 什么都没发生 |
| [15:12] | That means just handstuff | 意思就是只有手活 |
| [15:14] | -You…! -Oh! | -你 -嗷 |
| [15:17] | No, no, stop, stop, stop! | 不 住手 别打了 |
| [15:20] | Sorry, Barney, | 对不起 巴尼 |
| [15:21] | this… this-this is unforgivable. | 这事 这件事我没法原谅你 |
| [15:25] | It’s over. | 我们结束了 |
| [15:29] | You know… | 其实 |
| [15:32] | I never got to do that. | 我一直没机会这样做 |
| [15:43] | Ted? | 泰德吗 |
| [15:45] | Robin. | 我是罗宾 |
| [15:47] | We’re right on schedule. | 一切按计划进行 |
| [15:53] | -Barney is suicidal. -I know, it’s awesome! | -巴尼都想死了算了呢 -我知道 这太棒了 |
| [15:56] | Yep, kids, we had planned out | 是的 孩子们 我们计划好了 |
| [15:58] | every step of the night. | 那天晚上的每一个步骤 |
| [15:59] | It started three weeks earlier. | 这一切都从三周前开始说起 |
| [16:01] | …and you will disappoint me. | 你们一定会让我失望的 |
| [16:04] | But make it great, okay? | 但尽量弄好点 行吧 |
| [16:06] | Oh, it’ll be great, all right! | 哦 一定会很棒的 放心吧 |
| [16:08] | Okay, after two weeks of brainstorming, | 经过整整两周的苦思冥想 |
| [16:10] | all I have on my list so far is Purell. | 目前我就想到了普瑞来 |
| [16:10] | 普瑞来 洗手液公司 | |
| [16:13] | Marshall, what do you got? | 马修 你呢 |
| [16:14] | Well, nothing now. | 多亏你 现在没了 |
| [16:17] | This is impossible! | 这根本不可能完成啊 |
| [16:18] | How do you make something memorable for a guy | 你要怎么给一个将人生每个夜晚都安排的有声有色的人 |
| [16:20] | who makes every night the best night of his life? | 设计另一个另人难忘的夜晚呢 |
| [16:22] | Give him the worst night of his life. | 给他最糟糕的夜晚就行了 |
| [16:26] | 招数之”巴尼” | |
| [16:26] | We’ll give him the worst hotel room | 我们订个最差的房间 |
| [16:30] | with the worst entertainment, | 安排最烂的节目 |
| [16:32] | the wrong Karate Kid, | 错的龙威小子 |
| [16:34] | and the absolute last stripper he would want to see. | 还有他最不想见到的脱衣舞女 |
| [16:37] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [16:38] | You want me to pretend my life’s gone to crap | 你希望我装作生活一团糟 |
| [16:40] | and I’m back to stripping just screw with my ex-fiance? | 不得不重操旧业 只是为了整蛊前未婚夫吗 |
| [16:44] | I love it! | 这我喜欢 |
| [16:46] | That party will be so terrible, he’ll have to leave it. | 派对太糟糕 差到他急着想离开 |
| [16:48] | Then I’ll instruct his arch-nemesis to say… | 然后我会让他狡猾的宿敌说… |
| [16:52] | what kind of loser has his bachelor party | 什么样的怂货才会在 |
| [16:54] | ten yards from A.C. And doesn’t even gamble? | 离亚特拉大城不远的地方办单身派对 却不去赌一把 |
| [16:57] | Barney will take the envelope of cash I gave him | 巴尼会拿着我给他的一信封现金 |
| [16:59] | and head straight into our trap. | 掉头直奔我们的陷阱 |
| [17:02] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [17:03] | You want us to rig a casino game | 你希望我们在赌局中出老千 |
| [17:05] | to trick one of our former high rollers? | 来整蛊一名以前挥土如金的高级常客吗 |
| [17:07] | Um… | 呃 |
| [17:09] | I love it. | 我爱这个计划 |
| [17:10] | Well, then you get Barney | 恩 那到时候你就让 |
| [17:11] | to use one of these guys as collateral. | 巴尼选他们中的一个作为抵押 |
| [17:14] | -He’ll probably choose me. -What? | -他应该会选我 -什么 |
| [17:15] | Well, I’d be worth more. | 是啊 我更值钱 |
| [17:17] | Yeah. Perfect teeth. | 有一口好牙 |
| [17:18] | Yeah, it’s just, uh, | 是哈 只是 |
| [17:20] | just I’m way more athletic than you. | 只是我的运动神经比你好多了 |
| [17:22] | Yeah, this coming from the guy | 是哈 这句话是从一个 |
| [17:23] | who’s never beaten me at skee-ball. | 滑雪球从没赢过我的人嘴里说出来的 |
| [17:25] | The only reason a mobster might choose you is because | 人家黑道爷会选择你的唯一理由是 |
| [17:27] | they’d be afraid I’d go all “Marshall Unchained” On them, | 他们怕遭到我”被解救的马修”的报复 |
| [17:29] | which obviously isn’t a risk with you. | 而明显你就构不成什么威胁 |
| [17:31] | Oh, you want to see some “Ted Unchained,” Huh? | 是吗 你想看看”被解救的泰德”吗 啊 |
| [17:34] | I’ll show you Ted Unchained! | 我就让你看看”被解救的泰德” |
| [17:37] | Marshall, would you mind | 马修 你能不能 |
| [17:38] | standing over there for good luck? | 站到那边去 给我点好运 |
| [17:39] | Oh, yeah, sure. | 哦 当然可以 |
| [17:45] | Meanwhile, I’ll make sure | 与此同时 我会确保 |
| [17:47] | he’s abandoned me in my nightmare scenario. | 他会在我最噩梦的场景中 放我鸽子 |
| [17:50] | Hold on. You want me to help you trick my own son? | 等等 你希望我帮你整自己的儿子吗 |
| [17:54] | I love it. | 我爱这个计划 |
| [17:56] | Barney deserves it. | 巴尼活该 |
| [17:57] | You know, he told me you were a virgin. | 你知不知道 他告诉我你是处女 |
| [17:59] | Ridiculous! | 太荒谬了 |
| [18:01] | I know. | 我也觉得 |
| [18:02] | You are a dirty ho-bag just like me. | 你是个荡妇 跟我一样的 |
| [18:06] | But he loves you so much. | 可他却这么地爱你 |
| [18:08] | And so do I. | 我也好爱你哦 |
| [18:11] | Wait, hold on. Is there any chance | 等等 这些事情对巴尼 |
| [18:13] | this is all too mean to Barney? | 会不会有点太过分了 |
| [18:19] | Just kidding. | 开个玩笑 |
| [18:21] | Okay, we just need the finale. | 好了 现在只需要完成最终乐章了 |
| [18:23] | Oh! The Chinese mobsters chop off my hand | 哦 中国黑帮把我的手咔嚓砍下来 |
| [18:25] | right in front of Barney! | 让巴尼亲眼目睹 |
| [18:27] | Yes, we’re all equally enthused! | 就是这样 我们全都一样兴奋 |
| [18:32] | Okay, here’s the plan. After I storm off… | 好了 计划是这样 在我甩手走人之后… |
| [18:34] | Barney! | 巴尼 |
| [18:35] | Barney, hurry! Give them the money! | 巴尼 快点 把钱给他们 |
| [18:37] | -Please, hurry! -Oh, no! | -求你了 快点啊 -哦 不好 |
| [18:39] | The Chinese mobster is giving Marshall back | 中国黑帮要把马修送回来 |
| [18:41] | and taking me hostage instead, | 换我去当人质 |
| [18:43] | because he says I’m obviously more valuable! | 因为他说明显是我更值钱 |
| [18:46] | Can you, can you unlock the door? | 你能 能把门打开吗 |
| [18:48] | Barney, please! | 巴尼 求你了 |
| [18:49] | They’re gonna chop off my hand! | 不然他们就要砍掉我的手 |
| [18:50] | No, they’re not! | 他们不会的 |
| [18:51] | They said you’re free, and I think | 他们说了你自由了 而且我记得 |
| [18:53] | we agreed that’s not something mobsters would do. | 我们都同意这不是黑道爷会做的事 |
| [18:55] | Ted, come on! This is my thing! | 泰德 别闹了 这是我的戏份 |
| [18:57] | Don’t hurt him. | 别伤害他 |
| [18:58] | I’ve got the money. | 我有钱 |
| [18:59] | Too late! | 太迟了 |
| [19:03] | Not my skee-ball hand! | 别砍我玩滑雪球这只手啊 |
| [19:06] | -No…! -No…! | -不 -不 |
| [19:08] | No! | 不要 |
| [19:11] | Please, just don’t shoot me in the face… or the crotch! | 求你们 别射我的脸 或者裆部 |
| [19:14] | Surprise! | 惊喜吧 |
| [19:16] | What’s going on? | 这是怎么回事 |
| [19:19] | Well, we decided to give you | 是这样 我们决定帮你 |
| [19:20] | everything you wanted for your bachelor party | 完成你在单身派对上想做的每一件事情 |
| [19:23] | without you even realizing it. | 而且让你毫不知情 |
| [19:26] | Wait, so that’s why you made me think Marshall might die? | 等等 这就是你让我以为马修可能会死的原因吗 |
| [19:31] | And I’d lost all that money and my friends hated me | 还让我以为我输光了所有钱 我的朋友们都讨厌我 |
| [19:33] | and my wedding was off? | 我的婚礼也取消了 是吗 |
| [19:35] | You just decided to-to check off | 你就决定用所能想象到的 |
| [19:38] | everything on this list in the most twisted way imaginable? | 最极端最扭曲的方式来完成单子上的每一项吗 |
| [19:42] | That is awesome! | 真真是太赞了 |
| [19:45] | And it was all planned by a girl. | 而且这全是某个女孩一手策划的哦 |
| [19:48] | Wow! | 哇哦 |
| [19:51] | So, Lily… | 那 莉莉… |
| [19:54] | later on tonight, you want to, um…? | 一会儿你想不想 呃… |
| [19:56] | Whoa, whoa, whoa. | 喔 喔 喔 |
| [19:58] | That was all just part of the act. | 刚才那只是演戏的一部分 |
| [20:00] | Y-You knew that, right? | 你是知道的 对吧 |
| [20:03] | Yeah! Totally. | 知道啊 当然知道 |
| [20:04] | We pulled it off, right? | 咱们圆满完成了 不是吗 |
| [20:06] | Platonic shake! | 柏拉图式握手 |
| [20:14] | Everyone, everyone, thank you for an incredible bro mitzvah. | 大家听我说 感谢你们为我办这么棒的兄弟受诫礼 |
| [20:19] | Mazel brov! | 恭喜兄弟 |
| [20:19] | 原为Mazel tov 希伯来语里恭喜的意思 | |
| [20:20] | Mazel brov! | 恭喜兄弟 |
| [20:24] | Mm, oh, you didn’t really get everything on the list. | 嗯 你其实没有把单子上的每一项都做完 |
| [20:26] | N-No offense to Ralph Macchio, | 无意冒犯啊 拉尔夫•马奇奥 |
| [20:28] | but he ain’t the Karate Kid. | 但他才不是龙威小子呢 |
| [20:31] | I couldn’t agree with you more. | 我完全同意你的说法 |
| [20:35] | You know, they almost didn’t get me. | 你知道 他们差点就不能请到我了 |
| [20:39] | But after 18 voice mails… | 但在18个语音留言之后 |
| [20:43] | I returned Robin’s call. | 我回了罗宾的电话 |
| [20:46] | And she told me | 她告诉我 |
| [20:47] | how you’re one of the few people in the world | 你是这世界上少数几个 |
| [20:50] | who truly gets The Karate Kid movie. | 真正理解《龙威小子》这部电影的人之一 |
| [20:54] | So when she asked if I’d help, | 所以当她问我能不能帮忙时 |
| [20:57] | well, my answer just had to be… | 我的答案只可能是… |
| [21:02] | 是 | |
| [21:04] | William Zabka! | 威廉•扎布卡 |