| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | 周五 下午3点 | |
| [00:02] | Kids, it was two days | 孩子们 当时距离 |
| [00:03] | before Barney and Robin’s wedding, | 巴尼和罗宾婚礼还有两天 |
| [00:05] | and everything was going off without a hitch. | 一切都进展地顺风顺水 |
| [00:07] | Ah. | 啊 |
| [00:08] | Been waiting for the perfect time for this, | 一直在等最完美的机会 |
| [00:10] | and, my friend, that time is… | 我的朋友 而现在… |
| [00:12] | I saw you and Robin at the carousel. | 我看到你和罗宾在旋转木马那了 |
| [00:14] | Okay, there was one slight hitch. | 好吧 有一点不顺风 |
| [00:17] | She called me to help her, | 她打电话向我求助 |
| [00:17] | 一周之前 | |
| [00:20] | and there you were | 然后在大雨中 |
| [00:21] | in the rain | 我看到了 |
| [00:22] | holding hands with my fiancee. | 你握着我的未婚妻的手 |
| [00:28] | What up? | 出什么事了 |
| [00:29] | Nothing up. | 没出事 |
| [00:31] | Everything down. | 没出任何事 |
| [00:32] | All parts of me down. | 我身上能出什么事啊 |
| [00:34] | Look, | 听着 |
| [00:35] | you were busy, so I-I… | 你当时抽不开身 所以我 |
| [00:37] | I went to the park to help her look | 我就去公园帮她 |
| [00:39] | for this locket she buried years ago. | 找她多年以前埋在那的吊坠 |
| [00:40] | She couldn’t find it, she got upset, | 她到处找 找不到 心情很不好 |
| [00:42] | I held her hand. End of story. | 我握了握她的手 然后就没啦 |
| [00:47] | Cool! I just wanted to air that out. | 好吧 我就是想把话说开 |
| [00:49] | You know, bro to bro. | 你懂得 兄弟之间说亮话 |
| [00:50] | You’re my best friend and my best man. | 你是我最好的朋友 又是我的伴郎 |
| [00:52] | Of course I trust you. | 我当然无条件相信你 |
| [00:53] | Oh, come on. | 哎呀 好啦好啦 |
| [00:55] | You don’t have to cry about it. | 你也没必要哭出来吧 |
| [00:57] | It’s not that. | 不是这个 |
| [00:59] | That was a $600 bottle of scotch. | 是这瓶600块钱的威士忌 |
| [01:03] | Oh, my God. | 噢 我的天 |
| [01:08] | I hope Marshall gets here for the rehearsal dinner. | 真希望马修能赶上预演晚宴 |
| [01:12] | Thank you, Linus. | 多谢呐 莱纳斯 |
| [01:13] | He’s somewhere in Wisconsin in a rental car. | 他还在威斯康星州的什么地方 开着租来的车 |
| [01:16] | -Hertz? -I mean, it hurts a little | -赫茨租车啊 -确实有点伤 |
| [01:18] | but I’m not gonna cry about it. Hey! | 可我才不会为此流泪呢 嘿 |
| [01:20] | We’ve been doing that all afternoon. | 我们一下午都在玩这个梗 |
| [01:22] | Oh, who’s that for? | 啊 谁坐这啊 |
| [01:23] | Marshpillow. | 马枕枕 |
| [01:25] | Kids, as you may recall, whenever Marshall left town | 孩儿们 如果你们能记起来的话 |
| [01:28] | for a few days, | 当马修有一阵子不在时 |
| [01:29] | Lily would compensate with a body pillow | 莉莉就会给一个枕头穿衣打扮 |
| [01:31] | she dressed up and named Marshpillow. | 作为马修的替代品 起名叫马枕枕 |
| [01:33] | Pretty normal stuff. | 非常科学 |
| [01:35] | But with Marshall stuck driving across the country, | 但是这次马修穿越全国路途遥远 |
| [01:37] | Lily decided to upgrade. | 莉莉决定升级一下 |
| [01:39] | Meet Marshpillow 2.0! | 马枕枕2.0版 |
| [01:43] | Hey! | 嘿 |
| [01:44] | Am I on? | 能看到我吗 |
| [01:46] | Hey, guys! | 大伙好啊 |
| [01:48] | -Hey, Marsh. -Hey, Marshall. Hey. | -嗨 马修 -马修好啊 |
| [01:50] | It’s like you’re really here. | 感觉跟你真人到了一样 |
| [01:50] | Hey, Ted. | 嘿 泰德 |
| [01:52] | Can you give me a gander of the environs? | 能不能让我环顾一下四周啊 |
| [01:56] | Wow! | 哇哦 |
| [01:58] | This place looks beautif… | 这里看起来好漂… |
| [02:03] | Wait for it. | 等一下 |
| [02:05] | He’s frozen. | 他卡住了 |
| [02:07] | Same thing happened last night at the worst possible time. | 昨晚 同样的事情在最不该发生的情况下发生了 |
| [02:10] | I had just gotten on all fours and taken off my panti… | 我刚跪地提臀 脱掉内… |
| [02:19] | Now Lily’s frozen. | 这下莉莉卡住了 |
| [02:36] | …ful. | …亮呀 |
| [02:38] | This place is beautiful! | 这里好漂亮呀 |
| [02:40] | Wow. Lily, it looks like you really put | 哇 莉莉 看起来你还真是 |
| [02:43] | some time into this, huh? | 在这上面花了不少心思啊 |
| [02:45] | Though I wonder if | 不过我很好奇哈 |
| [02:47] | instead of dressing up | 相比于精心制作一个 |
| [02:48] | your giant husband doll like Malibu Ken, | 马里布•肯式的马修娃娃 |
| [02:52] | you could’ve spent a minute or two– | 你是否应该花个一两分钟 |
| [02:53] | I don’t know– | 怎么说呢 |
| [02:55] | planning the weak ass bachelorette party you threw me? | 给我筹备个稍微像样点的单身女派对呢 |
| [03:02] | I-It’s possible I forgot to send out the Evite. | 可能 我可能是忘发电子邀请函了 |
| [03:08] | Robin! | 罗宾 |
| [03:09] | Happy bachelorette party! | 单身夜快乐 |
| [03:11] | You invited Patrice to my bachelorette party?! | 你竟然邀请了帕特里斯来我的单身派对 |
| [03:15] | No. | 没有啊 |
| [03:17] | You know, it’s funny. | 说起来好笑 |
| [03:18] | When I was planning Barney’s bachelor party, | 我筹备巴尼的单身汉派对的时候 |
| [03:21] | I managed to wrangle his boyhood hero, Billy Zabka, | 我可是把他儿时的英雄”功夫小子”里面的 |
| [03:25] | from The Karate Kid. | 比利•扎布卡都请来了 |
| [03:26] | But you scored Patrice. | 但你就给我弄来个帕特里斯 |
| [03:28] | I’m sorry, Robin. | 对不起 罗宾 |
| [03:30] | I-I’ve just been so consumed with our move to Rome. | 只是 我满脑子都是要去罗马的事儿 |
| [03:34] | I guess I forgot to invite the girls. | 我大概是忘了邀请姑娘们了 |
| [03:37] | Yeah, Lily, I’d like to show you how it’s done. | 是啊 莉莉 我来跟你说说这事儿应该怎么办 |
| [03:39] | Billy Zabka, what a great guy. | 比利•扎布卡 多棒一人呐 |
| [03:42] | Look at how thorough Ted was planning the best man poker game | 你看看 泰德为了给巴尼开一局伴郎扑克 |
| [03:45] | he’s throwing for Barney. | 花了多少心血 |
| [03:46] | Wait, I think I’m on some sort of delay here. | 等会儿 我这儿好像有点延迟 |
| [03:49] | Best man visor for the dealer. | 发牌员的伴郎遮阳板 |
| [03:53] | Customized playing cards. | 定制的扑克牌 |
| [03:55] | Barney’s the king. | 巴尼是国王 |
| [03:57] | And… | 然后… |
| [03:58] | the queens | 王后们嘛 |
| [03:59] | are naked. | 都是裸体的 |
| [04:01] | It was my first decree. | 此乃朕之第一条诏令 |
| [04:03] | Hmm. Plus, Ted handwrote all of the table cards | 不仅如此 婚礼接待处的所有的桌牌 |
| [04:06] | for the reception in calligraphy. | 都是泰德用书法手写的 |
| [04:08] | The man’s a wizard with a pen. | 他一拿起笔就是天才 |
| [04:10] | Oh. I don’t know about all that. | 哎哟 这我就不确定了呢 |
| [04:12] | Though I was approached | 不过 高中毕业舞会 |
| [04:13] | by the decorating committee to make the signs for our senior prom. | 装饰委员会还真来找过我 让我给舞会写点字 |
| [04:18] | I’m told they were quite the hit. | 他们跟我说反响很火爆呢 |
| [04:21] | Hey, buddy, listen, | 嘿 伙计 是这样 |
| [04:25] | you’re gonna kill me, but I forgot to bring the table cards. | 我估计你弄死我的心都有了 但我真的忘带你写的那些桌牌了 |
| [04:29] | Uh, I’d hate to ask you to redo them… | 那 我也不想让你重新写一遍… |
| [04:31] | Say no more. The best man is on it. | 不用说了 伴郎我这就去办 |
| [04:33] | Thanks, Ted. | 谢了 泰德 |
| [04:36] | S-So now the best man | 这…就是说伴郎 |
| [04:38] | is painstakingly handwriting 200 table cards, | 现在要再煞费苦心地手写200张桌牌 |
| [04:42] | but my maid of honor forgot | 但是我亲爱的伴娘啊 |
| [04:44] | to click “Send” On an Evite. | 竟然连电子邀请函都忘了点”发送”啊 |
| [04:47] | I didn’t forget to invite the girls | 不是我忘了邀请你的女性朋友 |
| [04:49] | to your bachelorette party. | 来参加你的单身派对 |
| [04:50] | You have no girls! | 是你压根儿就没有女性朋友 |
| [04:52] | What? | 什么啊 |
| [04:54] | What? | 瞎说呢 |
| [04:56] | What? | 逗谁呢 |
| [04:58] | What? I… All my girls. | 哪儿跟哪儿啊 我…所有女性朋友 |
| [05:01] | I gave you a list. | 我给了你一个清单呢 |
| [05:03] | This list? | 这也能叫清单 |
| [05:04] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [05:05] | Tall girl from work, | 工作上的高个女 |
| [05:07] | Mouth-breather from coffee shop, | 咖啡馆里的口臭女 |
| [05:10] | Average-sized | 不知道哪儿来的 |
| [05:11] | girl from that place? | 身材中等的女生 |
| [05:13] | Ooh. Sorry I didn’t track her down. | 哎哟 没找到她真是抱歉呢 |
| [05:15] | She sounds great! | 她听起来感觉很棒呐 |
| [05:17] | She’s actually kind of a bitch. | 她其实是个贱货 |
| [05:19] | Face it, Robin. | 面对现实吧 罗宾 |
| [05:20] | You hate women, and… | 你讨厌女人 而且 |
| [05:22] | women hate you. | 女人也讨厌你 |
| [05:25] | Ted didn’t go to his prom? | 泰德没去参加他的毕业舞会吗 |
| [05:27] | Classic. | 太经典了 |
| [05:30] | While Lily was dropping the ball as Robin’s maid of honor, | 在莉莉作为伴娘 让新娘罗宾大失所望的时候 |
| [05:32] | the best man was busy knocking it out of the park. | 伴郎泰德正拼了老命地奋笔疾书 |
| [05:36] | Hey, buddy, listen, | 呃 兄弟 是这样的 |
| [05:39] | my great-aunt Ida has corns on her feet | 我姑姥姥艾达脚上长了个鸡眼 |
| [05:41] | and needs a first-floor room. | 她得住一楼 |
| [05:43] | Uh, would you mind switching rooms? | 那个 你介意跟她换下房间吗 |
| [05:45] | Say no more. The best man is on it. | 不用说了 伴郎我这就去办 |
| [05:47] | Thanks, Ted. | 谢了 泰德 |
| [06:01] | Hey, buddy, listen, | 呃 兄弟 是这样的 |
| [06:04] | the wedding doves got here early, | 婚礼上要用的鸽子提前送到了 |
| [06:06] | and I don’t know where to put ’em… | 我不知道把它们放哪儿… |
| [06:08] | Say no more. The best man is on it! | 不用说了 伴郎我这就去办 |
| [06:10] | Thanks, Ted. | 谢了 泰德 |
| [06:12] | Poor guys. | 小口年们 |
| [06:14] | All cooped up. | 都被关起来了哈 |
| [06:17] | I guess there’s no harm in letting you out for a bit, huh? | 给你们放出来自由一会儿也不会有多大的事儿的 是吧 |
| [06:22] | They carpet-bombed my entire room. | 那群坏鸟对我整间屋子进行了地毯式轰炸 |
| [06:24] | Wish I’d closed my suitcase. | 真希望当时我关上了手提箱 |
| [06:28] | And my mouth. | 也闭上了我的嘴 |
| [06:31] | Hey, buddy, listen, | 呃 兄弟 是这样的 |
| [06:33] | I see you wrote “N-O-period” Instead of the number sign. | 我看你写的是”No。” 不是”№” |
| [06:37] | I’m worried that might confuse the guests… | 我怕这会误导宾客啊 |
| [06:38] | Say no more. | 不用说了 |
| [06:39] | The best man is on it. | 伴郎我这就去办 |
| [06:41] | Thanks, Ted. | 谢谢 泰德 |
| [06:42] | Here they are. | 都做好了 |
| [06:44] | Freshly penned table cards in a pretty decent chancery | 新鲜出炉的座位卡 正体字写的哦 |
| [06:47] | considering I only had my travel quills. | 因为我只带了我的旅行鹅毛笔 |
| [06:50] | Wait. Why’s the poker game started? | 等等 怎么现在就开始玩起来了呢 |
| [06:53] | Oh, um, the best man moved the time. | 哦 嗯 伴郎把时间改了 |
| [06:56] | Mm, no, he didn’t. | 嗯 不 他没改啊 |
| [06:57] | Yes, he did. | 嗯 他改了 |
| [06:58] | Heya, Ted. | 嗨 泰德 |
| [07:00] | Thanks for the sweet lid, bro. | 谢谢你的帽子啦 |
| [07:05] | Billy Zabka’s your new best man? | 比利•扎布卡是你的新伴郎吗 |
| [07:07] | He’s the best… around. | 他是身边…最好的了 |
| [07:11] | Sorry, Ted. Maybe next wedding. | 对不起啦 泰德 下次婚礼再说吧 |
| [07:13] | What… | 什么 |
| [07:13] | So you’re playing the best man poker game without me? | 所以你玩伴郎扑克却没叫我 |
| [07:15] | Tim Gunn’s here and I’m not? | 蒂姆•冈恩都在这 你都没请我 |
| [07:17] | I’m Barney’s personal tailor, of course I’m here. | 我是巴尼的私人裁缝 我当然要出席 |
| [07:20] | Plus, I’ve never played poker before. | 另外 我还从来没玩过扑克 |
| [07:22] | It looks like a hoot. | 不过看起来蛮好玩的 |
| [07:24] | I moved into a dungeon. | 我搬到了地下室睡 |
| [07:26] | I wrote hundreds of cards. | 写了几百张座位卡 |
| [07:27] | I even gave your batty great-aunt Ida a foot massage | 我甚至还给你那奇怪的姑姥姥艾达做了足底按摩 |
| [07:30] | so vigorous it put her to sleep right there in the lobby. | 舒服的都让她在大厅睡着了 |
| [07:33] | Yeah, I don’t really have a great-aunt Ida. | 呃 这个叫艾达的姑姥姥是我瞎编的 |
| [07:41] | So you are mad about me and Robin holding hands. | 所以你还是在因为我牵罗宾手而生我的气 |
| [07:43] | Of course I’m mad, Ted. | 我当然很生气 泰德 |
| [07:45] | Holding hands is, like, the fourth-grade equivalent of banging. | 牵手 相当于四年级水平的上床了 |
| [07:47] | Well, in your case, 12th grade. | 当然 对你来说 相当于十二年级 |
| [07:49] | Self-five. | 自我击掌 |
| [07:50] | You broke the Bro Code. | 你违反了兄弟法则 |
| [07:53] | No, I did not. I only went to help Robin as a friend | 不 我没有 我只是作为朋友去帮助罗宾 |
| [07:55] | because you didn’t show up. | 还不是因为你没出现 |
| [07:57] | I did not break the Bro Code. | 我没有违反兄弟法则 |
| [07:58] | It’s in the text. | 兄弟法则都说了 |
| [07:59] | A bro shall not have a weird moment | 一个兄弟不能和另一个兄弟的 |
| [08:02] | -with another bro’s fiancee. -Well, | -未婚妻有暧昧的动作 -哦 |
| [08:04] | too bad we’re in Farhampton and can’t actually check. | 真不幸 我们在远汉普顿 没法去查查 |
| [08:07] | I am pleased to announce that the Bro Code has replaced | 我很高兴的宣布兄弟法则在 |
| [08:09] | the Gideons Bible at select hotels throughout the country. | 全国特定宾馆取代了基甸圣经 |
| [08:12] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [08:15] | I’m sorry I said you hate women. | 对不起 我说你讨厌女人 |
| [08:17] | Yeah, don’t be. | 唉 不用道歉 |
| [08:18] | For whatever reason, I just… | 出于某种原因 我就是… |
| [08:20] | I can’t seem to connect with them. Down! | 不能和她们好好的…卧倒 |
| [08:22] | Can you help me? I’ve got | 您能帮我一下吗 我在车里 |
| [08:24] | a bunch more wedding gifts in the van. | 还有更多的婚礼礼物呢 |
| [08:26] | Yay! I love Robin so much! | 太好了 我爱死罗宾了 |
| [08:29] | Oh, God, I’m gonna strangle that bitch. | 噢 天啊 我一定要勒死那个贱人 |
| [08:32] | Robin, what is it with you and women? | 罗宾 你和女人到底有什么问题啊 |
| [08:35] | They’re so annoying. | 她们太烦人了 |
| [08:37] | I’m glad that you’re my only female friend. | 但我很高兴你是我唯一的女性朋友 |
| [08:39] | Girls are always whining and crying over every little thing. | 女孩子总是为各种小破事哭哭啼啼的 |
| [08:45] | Yes. That’s exactly… | 是的 对的 就是这样 |
| [08:47] | Thank you. “Oh, oh, boo-hoo. | 谢谢你 哦 呜呜呜 嘤嘤嘤 |
| [08:51] | Look at me. I’m a sensitive little girl… | 快看我啊 我是个感情脆弱的小娘们 |
| [08:52] | Oh. God, I’m sorry. | 噢 天 对不起 |
| [08:54] | You’re actually crying. | 你真在哭啊 |
| [08:55] | It’s just so sad. | 真的是太难过了 |
| [08:58] | I can’t be your only girlfriend. | 我不能做你唯一的女性朋友啊 |
| [09:01] | Well, I don’t need anybody else. I got… I got you. | 我不需要别人啊 我已经有…我已经有你啦 |
| [09:04] | For another six days and then I’m off to Rome for a year. | 六天之后我就要飞去罗马了住上一年了 |
| [09:08] | What are you gonna do without our Saturday morning brunch | 没了我们每周六的早午餐配小八卦 |
| [09:11] | with a side of sassy gossip? | 你该怎么过啊 |
| [09:15] | A one-shot power play?! | 一杆命中 |
| [09:16] | Hey! Hey, Boston! | 嘿 听着 波士顿 |
| [09:19] | Why not drop your hockey pants | 下回你干脆脱了冰球裤 |
| [09:20] | and actually take a dump on the ice next time?! | 直接在冰上拉个坨坨算了 |
| [09:23] | I love it! | 真好玩 |
| [09:28] | See? It is just too horrible to even think about. | 发现没 光是想想都觉得恐怖 |
| [09:31] | Yeah. You… | 嗯 你… |
| [09:32] | need another female friend. | 需要另外找一个女性朋友 |
| [09:35] | Whenever I try to talk to women, | 每次我试图和女人交谈的时候 |
| [09:36] | they look like they want to punch me. | 她们都看起来想要揍我似的 |
| [09:38] | Well, | 好吧 |
| [09:39] | maybe you’re accidentally giving off the wrong vibe. | 或许是因为你不小心说错话了 |
| [09:42] | Like, what do you say to other women at the gym? | 比如说 你一般会对健身房里的女人说什么呢 |
| [09:46] | Oh, well, I haven’t been to the gym in forever. | 哦 我有一千年没去过健身房了 |
| [09:47] | My metabolism is all messed up. | 我的代谢系统已经坏掉了 |
| [09:49] | See, I can moose down a pint of fudge ripple | 你知道吗 我可以前天晚上干掉一大杯软糖酱 |
| [09:52] | for a midnight snack and wake up having lost weight. | 然后第二天早上起来居然会变瘦 |
| [09:55] | Well, everywhere except for my boobs. | 好吧 瘦的只剩胸了 |
| [09:59] | So annoying. | 太讨厌了 |
| [10:02] | You’re gonna need a lot of work. | 看来你真是欠调教 |
| [10:05] | It’s in here. Somewhere. | 肯定在里面 某个地方 |
| [10:07] | I… It has to be. | 它应该有写到的 |
| [10:09] | Damn it, I know I should’ve done these in alphabrotical order. | 该死的 早知道我就用字兄表排序了 |
| [10:12] | Who cares about the Bro Code? | 谁在乎兄弟法则啊 |
| [10:14] | It’s just some stupid book you made up. | 这只是一本你自己瞎掰的烂书而已 |
| [10:16] | How dare you? | 岂有此理 |
| [10:19] | The Bro Code has been around for centuries. | 兄弟法则已经流传了好几个世纪了 |
| [10:22] | Nay… | 不对 |
| [10:24] | whatever’s more than centuries. | 比世纪还长的单位是什么来着 |
| [10:26] | Please don’t launch into a fake history lesson. | 请不要空降到哪朝野史上 |
| [10:28] | The Bro Code can trace its lineage all the way back | 兄弟法则可以追溯到 |
| [10:31] | to Broses himself. | 摩兄西时代 |
| [10:33] | Article one: | 第一章 |
| [10:37] | bros before ho’s. | 兄弟如手足 女人如衣服 |
| [10:39] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [10:40] | I see what you’re doing. You can’t prove that | 我知道你想干嘛了 你不能证明 |
| [10:42] | I broke the Bro Code, | 我违反了兄弟法则 |
| [10:43] | so you’re just making up stories about… | 所以你就开始编故事 |
| [10:45] | This sacred text was eventually brought | 这个神圣的文件最终在1776年 |
| [10:47] | to the New World in 1776 by none other | 被带到了新大陆 不是别人 |
| [10:51] | than Christopher Brolumbus. | 就是他 克里斯多夫•”哥”伦布 |
| [10:53] | Article 62: | 第六十二章 |
| [10:55] | a bro who calls dibs first has dibs. | 兄弟抢妹子 先到先得 |
| [10:59] | Oh? Dibs! | 哦 哥要了 |
| [11:02] | And that’s why he got to bang Pocahontas. | 所以他泡到了宝嘉康蒂 |
| [11:05] | Pocahontas was with John Smith. | 宝嘉康蒂最后跟了约翰•史密斯 |
| [11:07] | Maybe according to the hotel register. | 也许宾馆是这样登记的 |
| [11:09] | Whatever Mrs. Brolumbus didn’t know | 但是”哥”伦布太太不知道这一点 |
| [11:10] | couldn’t hurt her, am I right? | 这也伤不了她 对吧 |
| [11:12] | Well, except maybe that New World syphilis. | 好吧 除非有新大陆牌梅毒 |
| [11:14] | But I digress. | 我跑题了 |
| [11:15] | Barney, if you believe in the Bro Code, | 巴尼 如果你这么信奉兄弟法则 |
| [11:18] | how come you’ve broken it so many times? | 为什么你违反了这么多次呢 |
| [11:21] | How dare you! | 岂有此理 |
| [11:22] | I have never broken the Bro Code! | 我从来都没有违反过兄弟法则 |
| [11:24] | Hmm? Hmm? Ah. | 真的吗 啊 |
| [11:26] | Article 104: | 第一百零四章 |
| [11:28] | the mom of a bro is always off limits. | 兄弟妈 不可压 |
| [11:32] | Okay, look, we’ve all had a lot of fun | 好吧 听着 调侃我泡你妈这个梗 |
| [11:35] | joking about me banging your mom. | 一直以来给我们带来了很多欢乐 |
| [11:37] | Not all of us. Continue. | 我可没觉得欢乐 继续说 |
| [11:39] | But I swear nothing ever happened between the two of us. | 但我发誓 我和你妈之间绝对什么都没发生过 |
| [11:42] | Trust me. | 相信我 |
| [11:44] | And what’s going on with your fingers? | 你的手指怎么了 |
| [11:48] | That’s how our bodies were intertwined. | 我们就这样在榻上缠绵的 |
| [11:51] | All right, this is ridiculous! | 够了 这太荒谬了 |
| [11:53] | It’s ridiculous that you won’t admit holding Robin’s hand was weird. | 你不承认握着罗宾的手很暧昧才是荒谬 |
| [11:56] | It wasn’t weird! | 一点都不暧昧 |
| [11:57] | Yes, it was. | 不 很暧昧 |
| [12:00] | You know what? | 这样吧 |
| [12:01] | We need a third impartial bro to settle this. | 我们找一个中立的第三方来解决问题 |
| [12:06] | To resolve this, | 为解决这个问题 |
| [12:07] | I really need to parse the text of the Bro Code. | 我需要逐字解读兄弟法则的条款 |
| [12:10] | It’s too bad Marshall doesn’t have a copy. | 真可惜 马修手上没有一本 |
| [12:13] | Actually, I do. | 其实我有 |
| [12:15] | They were in the, uh, seat back pockets on my flight | 飞机座椅背面的袋子里就有 |
| [12:17] | in place of the safety cards. | 代替了安全说明 |
| [12:19] | I’m also pleased to announce The Bro Code is now available | 我愉快地宣布兄弟法则已经 |
| [12:21] | in select airlines across the country. | 进驻某些特定的国内航班 |
| [12:23] | And Lufthansa. | 还有德国汉莎航空 |
| [12:25] | Der Bro Code is, like, huge in Germany. | 兄弟法则在德国火了 |
| [12:28] | Okay, so prove to me | 好吧 证明给我看 |
| [12:30] | you can make a female friend. | 你可以交到女性朋友 |
| [12:32] | What about her? | 她怎么样 |
| [12:34] | Ugh! The girl with the bangs? | 呃 留刘海的女生 |
| [12:37] | Any chick who does that to her hair | 女生留这种发型 |
| [12:39] | is going through a big life transition | 是因为正在经历生活的巨变 |
| [12:41] | I don’t want to hear about. | 我可不想听那些 |
| [12:43] | Next time, grow your bangs long enough to cover your mouth. | 待你刘海齐腰 一拳闷死你可好 |
| [12:45] | Ha-pass. | 算啦 |
| [12:47] | Okay, well… | 好吧 那么 |
| [12:48] | what about her? | 她怎么样 |
| [12:50] | Ugh! Comfortable shoes? | 呃 运动鞋啊 |
| [12:53] | What, are you filibustering later? | 你是准备抢银行吗 |
| [12:55] | It’s after 5:00. Put on some heels. | 这是大白天 拜托穿高跟鞋 |
| [12:57] | Ha-pass. | 得了吧 |
| [12:58] | -Okay, well, what about…? -Ugh! | -好吧 那么 那个 -呃 |
| [13:01] | I haven’t even pointed to anyone yet! | 我还没开始指呢 |
| [13:03] | Now, | 现在 |
| [13:05] | although not expressly stated in the Bro Code, | 尽管兄弟法则里没有明确指出 |
| [13:09] | a weird moment between a bro and his bro’s fiancee is, | 但兄弟和兄弟未婚妻之间的暧昧举动 |
| [13:13] | in my bropinion… A violation. | 在我的兄弟观里 是违规的 |
| [13:17] | -No! -Yes! -However, | -不是吧 -就是 -但是 |
| [13:18] | Ted was helping Robin as a friend. | 泰德是以朋友的身份在帮助罗宾 |
| [13:21] | Therefore, | 因此 |
| [13:22] | holding her hand | 牵她的手 |
| [13:23] | isn’t necessarily a weird moment. | 不完全算暧昧举动 |
| [13:25] | -No! -Yes! | -不是吧 -就是 |
| [13:27] | That being said… | 综上所述 |
| [13:28] | What? | 什么说 |
| [13:29] | …if we decide that holding any friend’s hand is weird, | 如果我们认为牵起朋友的手就算暧昧的话 |
| [13:33] | then, yes, Ted did break the Bro Code. | 那么泰德确实违反了兄弟法则 |
| [13:36] | So, the question is this. | 所以问题就变成 |
| [13:37] | If Ted had gone to the park | 如果泰德在公园 |
| [13:39] | and held Barney’s hand, | 握的是巴尼的手 |
| [13:41] | would it have been weird? | 算是暧昧吗 |
| [13:44] | -No? -Yes? | -不是吧 -就是吧 |
| [13:51] | See? | 看到没 |
| [13:55] | It’s not weird at all. | 一点都不暧昧 |
| [13:59] | I don’t know what to say. | 我不知道该说什么 |
| [14:00] | Just be yourself. | 做你自己就好 |
| [14:01] | Say something nice. | 说点好听的 |
| [14:02] | Which one? I can’t do both. | 按哪条执行 两条一起我做不来 |
| [14:09] | Slut alert. | 有浪女出没 |
| [14:11] | That’s my 14-year-old daughter. | 那是我14岁的女儿 |
| [14:14] | Crappy mom alert. | 不靠谱老妈出没 |
| [14:17] | Ugh! | 呃 |
| [14:18] | It’s you. Nice bangs. | 是你啊 刘海不错 |
| [14:21] | What is wrong with you?! | 你什么毛病啊 |
| [14:23] | I can’t do this, okay? | 我做不了这个 好吗 |
| [14:25] | I was raised as a boy. | 我是被当成男孩养大的 |
| [14:27] | I don’t get along with women. | 和女人合不来 |
| [14:28] | Can we just drop it? | 放弃吧 行吗 |
| [14:30] | Okay, I never thought I’d take a page | 好吧 我从来没想过有一天 |
| [14:33] | out of your fiance’s playbook, but… | 我竟然会用到你未婚夫的泡妞宝典 |
| [14:35] | it’s time to target the crying chick. | 是时候搞定哭泣的小妞了 |
| [14:41] | Not weird at all. | 一点都不暧昧啊 |
| [14:44] | Marshall, | 马修 |
| [14:46] | why are we doing this?! | 我们这样做的意义何在啊 |
| [14:47] | Two dudes on a beach with a lifeless blob | 两个大男人傻坐在沙滩上 |
| [14:50] | they’re pretending is alive? | 还把死气沉沉的电脑当成大活人 |
| [14:51] | It’s stupid. | 太煞笔了 |
| [14:53] | So, I guess that means Weekend at Bernie’s is stupid, too. | 这么说 《老板去度假》也很煞笔咯 |
| [14:56] | E-Lawyered. | 艾大律师 一语中的 |
| [14:58] | Now, before I can render a decision, | 好 在我做出判决之前 |
| [15:01] | we need to recreate the variables | 我们需要尽可能的重现当时 |
| [15:03] | at the carousel as closely as possible. | 在旋转木马那儿的场景 |
| [15:05] | Since Ted says that he was comforting Robin, | 既然泰德说他当时是在安慰罗宾 |
| [15:08] | he needs to do | 那他也得 |
| [15:09] | the same for Barney, so, Ted, comfort Barney. | 同等对待巴尼 所以说 泰德 安慰巴尼 |
| [15:13] | I don’t see how that… | 我不明白这… |
| [15:15] | Comfort… Barney. | 安慰巴尼 |
| [15:19] | Barney, what is going on with you? | 巴尼 你到底是怎么了啊 |
| [15:23] | Why are you so upset with me? | 你干嘛对我如此不依不饶呢 |
| [15:25] | Marshall, this is stupid! I don’t… | 马修 这太弱智了 我不… |
| [15:28] | Accept the comfort. | 接受他的安慰 |
| [15:29] | Fine! | 好吧 |
| [15:33] | I guess… I’m not really mad at you. | 我想… 也许我不是真的生你的气吧 |
| [15:36] | I’m mad at myself. I should have met Robin | 我是在生自己的气 我应该在罗宾打电话的时候 |
| [15:38] | at the carousel when she called, | 就第一时间赶到旋转木马那儿的 |
| [15:40] | but I was having such a good time greasing 12-year-olds. | 但我正愉快的打赏我那群12岁的小伙伴呢 |
| [15:44] | Laser tag. | 真人激光枪 |
| [15:45] | Helpful. Continue. | 起作用了 继续 |
| [15:48] | Look, Ted, I’m sorry that I’ve been taking it out on you. | 听着 泰德 很抱歉我一直都把这种情绪发泄在你身上 |
| [15:51] | You were just being a good friend to Robin. | 你只是做了一个好朋友该做的 |
| [15:54] | It’s okay. | 没关系的 |
| [15:56] | It would be different if you still had feelings for her, | 当然如果你还对她余情未了的话就是另一回事了 |
| [15:58] | but you don’t, right? | 但你没有 对吧 |
| [16:02] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [16:11] | Okay, now it’s weird. | 现在变得有点奇怪了 |
| [16:16] | You still have feelings for Robin?! | 你还对罗宾有感觉啊 |
| [16:19] | What?! What?! What?! What?! | 什么啊 没有啊 哪儿啊 瞎说啊 |
| [16:22] | Okay, yes, sometimes I do. | 好吧 我承认有时候会 |
| [16:24] | Well, then, turn ’em off! | 那就关掉啊 |
| [16:25] | I would love to, but it doesn’t work that way! | 我也想啊 但这不是想关就关的 |
| [16:27] | I’m a… I’m a human being. I-I-I don’t have an off switch. | 我是…我是肉体凡身 我没有那种开关啊 |
| [16:30] | I’m shutting off. | 我要关了 |
| [16:34] | There, there. | 好啦 好啦 |
| [16:36] | Sister? | 姐们 |
| [16:38] | Who needs a lady hug? | 谁想要一个闺蜜式的抱抱 |
| [16:41] | What the hell are you doing?! | 你她娘的在搞什么啊 |
| [16:43] | Wait. Did you just “Ugh” My hug? | 等会儿 你刚刚是嫌弃了我爱的抱抱吗 |
| [16:46] | I don’t need a hug. | 我才不要什么抱抱呢 |
| [16:47] | I’m pissed off because | 我郁闷是因为 |
| [16:48] | the Rangers just lost to the Boston Bruins. | 刚刚纽约流浪者队败给了波士顿棕熊队 |
| [16:50] | I hate the Boston Bruins! | 我恨死波士顿棕熊队了×2 |
| [16:57] | Look, Barney, I hate these feelings. | 听着 巴尼 我烦死这种感觉了 |
| [16:58] | I hate myself for having these feelings. | 我恨我自己无法摆脱这种感觉 |
| [17:00] | No one wishes they would go away more than I do, | 没有人比我更想要它们滚的远远的 |
| [17:03] | but I just… I… I can’t seem to make that happen. I’ve tried. | 但我只是 臣妾做不到啊 我试过无数遍了 |
| [17:06] | Well, then, try harder! | 那你就再试一次 |
| [17:08] | I’m marrying her in less than two days! | 我两天后就要娶她了 |
| [17:10] | What the hell are we gonna do about this?! | 你说我们该怎么解决这事儿 |
| [17:14] | As she watched Robin make a new friend, Lily was happy… | 看着罗宾交到了一个新朋友 莉莉很开心… |
| [17:18] | for two seconds. | 只是两秒 |
| [17:21] | Oh, no! Oh, come on, ref! | 噢 不是吧 裁判 |
| [17:23] | I haven’t seen that much hooking go unpunished | 自打我上次去维加斯之后还没看到过 |
| [17:25] | since my last trip to Vegas. | 这么钩人还不被罚的 |
| [17:26] | And I was on that trip, because we are best friends now. | 我也去了的哦 因为我俩现在是最好的朋友啦 |
| [17:30] | Hey, | 嘿 |
| [17:32] | this might sound a little nutty, but | 这听起来可能有点疯狂 但 |
| [17:34] | how about we inject a sexual edge | 不如我们加点蕾丝边情节 |
| [17:37] | into our abiding friendship that… | 到我们牢不可破的友谊里吧 |
| [17:38] | …in no way jeopardizes our emotional connection, | 这怎么都不会危害到我们的感情 |
| [17:42] | or respective marriages?! | 和我们各自的婚姻的 |
| [17:45] | Aw! | 噢 |
| [17:46] | Hell, no! | 妈蛋 我不干 |
| [17:47] | Excuse me. | 失陪一下 |
| [17:49] | I’ve got a Boston Brewin’, if you know what I mean. | 我得去酝酿一泡波屎顿 如果你知我心 |
| [17:54] | You listen, and you listen good. | 你给我听着 给我好好听着 |
| [17:56] | If I see your face around Robin again, | 如果我再在罗宾身边看到你这张臭脸 |
| [17:58] | you will be crying about a lot more | 我会让你哭得比为纽约游奇兵队 |
| [18:00] | than your precious New York Rogers. | 哭得都要加倍难过 |
| [18:02] | -Rangers? -I will cut you! | -游骑兵队吗 -我要砍了你 |
| [18:09] | Forgot my purse. | 忘记拿我钱包了 |
| [18:13] | You know what? | 你知道吗 |
| [18:14] | That’s why I only need you. | 这就是为什么我只需要你 |
| [18:16] | ‘Cause you’re a psycho. | 因为你是个疯子 |
| [18:18] | My psycho. | 我的小疯子 |
| [18:20] | -I am, aren’t I? -Mm-hmm. | -我就是 对吧 -嗯哪 |
| [18:26] | There’s the blushing bride! | 我们羞涩的新娘在这啊 |
| [18:28] | Back off, Patrice! | 滚远点 帕特里斯 |
| [18:31] | Look, Barney, the truth is, it was weird at the carousel. | 听着 巴尼 事实就是 在旋转木马确实很暧昧 |
| [18:35] | On some level, it’s probably been weird | 在某种程度上 自从我和罗宾分手以来 |
| [18:37] | between me and Robin ever since we broke up. | 可能每时每刻都很暧昧很奇怪 |
| [18:39] | But you’re my brother. | 可你是我兄弟啊 |
| [18:40] | I would never do anything | 我不会做任何伤害 |
| [18:41] | to hurt you, ever. | 你的事 绝不会 |
| [18:42] | I mean it, I swear! | 我很认真的 我发誓 |
| [18:44] | I’ll-I’ll even swear it on the Bro Code. | 我 我甚至可以对着兄弟法则发誓 |
| [18:46] | The Bro Code’s stupid. | 兄弟法则很傻逼的 |
| [18:48] | How dare you! | 谁给你的胆子 |
| [18:51] | I’d be honored. | 我会很荣幸的 |
| [18:57] | I can’t promise that I’ll ever get to a place where it won’t be | 我不能保证 我可以做到让我和罗宾之间 |
| [19:01] | at least a little weird between me and Robin. | 一丁点暧昧的奇怪感觉都没有 |
| [19:03] | But I don’t want to lose you as a friend, either of you. | 但是我也不想失去你们这对朋友 谁也不想 |
| [19:08] | So I will do everything I can | 所以我会尽我所能 |
| [19:10] | to move on and live with it. | 尽快走出来 不再有一丝牵挂 |
| [19:12] | The question is… can you? | 现在的问题是 你能做到吗 |
| [19:21] | I’m sorry, Ted. I just… can’t do this. | 我很抱歉 泰德 我只是…我做不到啊 |
| [19:25] | I fold. | 哥不要了 |
| [19:27] | What about the best man? | 伴郎如何呢 |
| [19:35] | I fold, too. | 哥也不要了 |
| [19:36] | I fold. | 不要了 |
| [19:38] | There goes my belly buster. | 这真是哥大大的失策啊 |
| [19:39] | You sandbag all night, | 你堆了一晚上的沙堆 |
| [19:40] | only to bluff a couple of rags, pre-flop, | 只是想要在翻牌前吓吓你们 |
| [19:43] | and wind up with a dry board. | 结果却以白板结束 |
| [19:45] | That’s what you get | 这就好像你 |
| [19:46] | for limping in shorts-tacked with a pack of donkeys. | 在一群蠢驴中间穿着短裤却站也站不稳 |
| [19:49] | Muck city. | 肮脏的城市啊 |
| [19:54] | I fold! | 我不要了好吧 |
| [19:55] | Yeah… Oh, right. I knew that. | 好吧 就是啊 我就知道 |
| [19:56] | I knew that. | 我就知道 |
| [19:58] | Okay, two players left. | 好的 还剩最后两位 |
| [20:06] | You are bluffing, robot man. | 你不过在装腔作势罢了 机器人 |
| [20:07] | I raise. | 我加码 |
| [20:09] | Oh. | 噢 |
| [20:10] | Hey, Billy, do you mind | 嘿 比利 你介不介意 |
| [20:12] | pushing my chips into the center of the pot? | 帮我把筹码推到桌中心去 |
| [20:16] | Preferably with gusto, because… | 最好享受这个过程 因为… |
| [20:19] | I’m all in! | 我加上全部 |
| [20:21] | Oh! Oh, boy! | 噢 哦 天哪 |
| [20:23] | -All right, all right. -Oh! | -好的 好的 -我去 |
| [20:29] | And that’s how I became Barney’s best man again. | 这就是我怎么又变回了巴尼的伴郎 |
| [20:32] | Everything was back to going off without a hitch. | 所有事都顺风顺水地回归了正轨 |
| [20:35] | I’m coming for you, Mosby. | 你给我等着 莫斯比 |
| [20:38] | Okay, there was one slight hitch. | 好吧 还有那么一点不顺风 |