| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | 周五 晚上9点 | |
| [00:01] | Look at this, | 看看吧 |
| [00:02] | -your wedding weekend. -I know. | -你的婚礼周末 -我知道 |
| [00:04] | This close to finally having sex again. | 差这么一点就可以再滚次床单了 |
| [00:06] | It’s been forever. | 已经太久没滚过了 |
| [00:07] | Oh, you and Robin been abstaining? | 噢 你和罗宾在禁欲吗 |
| [00:09] | Talking about you, Ted. | 说你呢 泰德 |
| [00:10] | Now here’s the deal: every hookup | 是这样的 婚礼周末里 |
| [00:12] | at a weekend wedding is decided at Friday night drinks. | 你要上的妞 在周五晚上喝两杯时 就已经定论了 |
| [00:15] | Get stuck with the wrong girl tonight, | 今晚选一个错误的女孩 |
| [00:17] | the only action you’ll be getting all weekend | 你整个周末能做的就只有 |
| [00:19] | is a self-five, and I don’t mean the cool kind. | 自我击掌了 还不是酷翻天的那种 |
| [00:22] | Self-five! That’s the cool kind. | 自我击掌 这才是酷翻天的 |
| [00:25] | Well, that’s a big decision. | 那太难决定了 |
| [00:27] | The biggest. | 史上最难 |
| [00:28] | It brings to mind that religious text | 这让我想起来宗教经典里那个 |
| [00:31] | which we hold most sacred: | 最神圣的一篇 |
| [00:33] | Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. | 印第安纳•琼斯和最后的十字军 |
| [00:36] | Remember? They entered a chamber. | 记得不 他们走进一间石室 |
| [00:39] | Really? I’m the one working with the Nazis? | 真的吗 我演跟纳粹一起工作的家伙 |
| [00:42] | Ted, just… just… okay? | 泰德 你就… 配合下 会死吗 |
| [00:45] | Yeah. They had to choose | 没错 他们必须选择 |
| [00:48] | which cup was this special cup. | 哪一杯是最特别的一杯 |
| [00:50] | I forget what it was called, | 我忘了那叫什么 |
| [00:51] | but it’s like the Holy Grail of cups. | 但是它就像圣杯杯一样 |
| [00:53] | -It was the Holy Grail. -Of cups, exactly. | -是叫圣杯 -杯 没错 |
| [00:56] | So the Nazi confederate chose, and… | 于是纳粹同盟选过了 然后… |
| [00:59] | Please don’t make me do that… | 请别让我做这个… |
| [01:01] | -Ted, Ted, the confederate Nazi chose, and…? -I… | -泰德 泰德 纳粹同盟选了然后… -我… |
| [01:04] | Okay, okay. | 好吧好吧 |
| [01:06] | Oh. | 噢 |
| [01:12] | And so now I’m gonna explode. | 然后我就要爆炸了 |
| [01:15] | He chose… | 他的选择… |
| [01:17] | poorly. | 弱爆了 |
| [01:19] | Then Indy picked a cup, and… | 接着印第拿起一个杯子 然后… |
| [01:26] | You chose… | 你的选择… |
| [01:28] | wisely. | 碉堡了 |
| [01:36] | So choose wisely, Ted. | 好好选啊 泰德 |
| [01:38] | To help you decide, I spent all day yesterday | 为了助你一臂之力 我昨天花了一整天 |
| [01:41] | picking your top three prospects. | 给你挑了三个绝佳人选 |
| [01:42] | And I helped. | 我也有帮忙哦 |
| [01:43] | It was either that or writing our vows. | 不做这个就得写婚礼誓词了 |
| [01:45] | Uch! Gag. | 呃 (＞﹏＜) |
| [01:46] | Sophia was Robin’s college roommate, | 索菲亚是罗宾的大学室友 |
| [01:50] | and she’s apparently “A bit of a screamer” in the sack. | 她很明显”有点尖叫情结” |
| [01:53] | Yeah, during sex, | 没错 滚床单时 |
| [01:54] | she sounds exactly like a car alarm from the ’90s. | 她听起来就像90年代的汽车警报 |
| [01:56] | You know, whoo-whoo-whoo-whoo, ooh-uh, ooh, ah-ah-ah-ah. | 你懂的 呜呜呜呜 唔 啊啊啊啊 |
| [02:01] | Dudes love it. | 男人们都好这口 |
| [02:03] | Cassie is the daughter of my mom’s best friend. | 卡茜是我妈的小亲亲的女儿 |
| [02:06] | sad story, 12 years ago, her gymnast career | 悲剧的是 12年前 她的体操运动员生涯 |
| [02:09] | was tragically cut short when her boobs got too big. | 被无情的结束了 因为胸部发育太快了 |
| [02:14] | Grace is a new coworker. | 格蕾丝是新来的同事 |
| [02:16] | She’s had six different positions at the firm, | 她在公司里有6个不同的职位 |
| [02:19] | and that was just at the Christmas party. | 那还只是在圣诞聚会上的 |
| [02:21] | Ooh. | 喔 |
| [02:22] | So, Grace doesn’t arrive till later. | 格蕾丝晚点才能来 |
| [02:24] | I recommend Sophia. | 我推荐索菲亚 |
| [02:27] | I strongly feel that you should strongly feel her. | 我强烈预感你应该深入感受她 |
| [02:31] | I guess it’s decided, then. | 我猜就选她了吧 |
| [02:33] | -Ted, right? -Yeah. | -泰德 对吗 -是我 |
| [02:35] | I’m Cassie. | 我是卡茜 |
| [02:37] | Oh… something tells me | 哦…有什么在告诉我 |
| [02:39] | that we are gonna have a lot of fun this weekend. | 我们这个周末一定会乐趣多多 |
| [02:45] | Cassie. I pick Cassie. | 卡茜 我选卡茜 |
| [02:49] | You chose… | 你的选择… |
| [02:52] | poorly. | 弱爆了 |
| [03:08] | Hey, there’s our minister. | 看 那是我们的牧师 |
| [03:10] | Oh, what a sweet-looking old… | 噢 真是个爱意浓浓的老… |
| [03:13] | Ah! He looks scary. | 呀 他太凶残了 |
| [03:15] | Looks can be deceiving, Lily. | 不要以貌取人 莉莉 |
| [03:16] | But not in this case. | 不过这次例外 |
| [03:18] | He’s a mean old tool. | 他是个刻薄的老块头 |
| [03:21] | Oh, he can’t be that bad. | 哦 他应该没那么坏吧 |
| [03:24] | I’ll get him to come around. | 让我来会会他 |
| [03:28] | Hi, Reverend, | 你好 牧师 |
| [03:29] | I’m Lily Aldrin, the maid of honor. | 我是莉莉•艾尔德林 首席伴娘 |
| [03:32] | Not too much honor. | 没看出来什么敬意 |
| [03:33] | You’re dressed like a whore. | 你穿的跟个荡妇似的 |
| [03:37] | He love me. | 他喜欢我 |
| [03:41] | So what’s going on? Why aren’t you telling your wife | 什么情况啊 为什么不告诉你妻子 |
| [03:43] | you got an offer to be a judge? | 你得到了法官的录取通知 |
| [03:45] | Lily had her heart set on us moving to Rome, | 莉莉一心都想着搬去罗马 |
| [03:47] | so I have to tell her in person. | 所以我得当面跟她说 |
| [03:49] | That way, I know that I can convince her | 这样我肯定能说服她 |
| [03:51] | that we need to stay. | 我们必须留下来 |
| [03:53] | In the courtroom, they call me Th e Convincer. | 在法庭上 他们都叫我”说服者” |
| [03:56] | They really call you that? | 他们真这么叫你吗 |
| [03:58] | I convinced them to call me that. | 是我说服他们这么叫的 |
| [04:01] | But you have to prepare for your court cases. | 但在法庭上你会为案件做准备 |
| [04:03] | Did you prepare for talking to Lily? | 你为跟莉莉谈话做准备了吗 |
| [04:05] | I don’t need to prepare, okay? | 哥不需要什么准备 好吗 |
| [04:06] | I can craft a nice… | 哥可以信手拈来… |
| [04:09] | thingy. | 这玩意 |
| [04:12] | Oh, wow I’m totally… | 噢 我完全是… |
| [04:14] | the twisty metal thingy? | 扭一起的金属玩意 |
| [04:15] | You’re screwed. | 你死定了 |
| [04:16] | I’m screwed! | 我死定了 |
| [04:19] | I’m sorry, Ted, I don’t know. | 对不起 泰德 我不知道 |
| [04:21] | I’m just so tired of this routine: | 我就是厌倦了这个程序 |
| [04:23] | we flirt, we have a few drinks, | 我们调情 喝点小酒 |
| [04:25] | and then we end the night with meaningless sex. | 然后用毫无意义的一炮结束这个夜晚 |
| [04:28] | Oh… | 哦… |
| [04:30] | yeah. | 没错 |
| [04:32] | Me, too. | 我也是 |
| [04:33] | Do you want to start the night with meaningless sex | 你想用毫无意义的一炮来开始夜晚吗 |
| [04:36] | and then flirt later? | 然后晚点调情 |
| [04:37] | You are a visionary. | 你太有远见了 |
| [04:40] | Come on. | 来吧 |
| [04:42] | Oh! Oh! It’s work. | 噢噢 工作电话 |
| [04:44] | Should I get it or ignore it? | 我是接还是不接 |
| [04:46] | Or get it? Oh, or ignore it? | 还是接呢 还是无视它呢 |
| [04:48] | -Um… -Forget it? | -唔… -忘了它 |
| [04:49] | You know. Go ahead, get it. | 还是接吧 接吧 |
| [04:51] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [04:52] | Hello? | 喂 |
| [04:55] | You chose… | 你的选择… |
| [04:57] | poorly. | 弱爆了 |
| [04:58] | I’m fired? | 我被解雇了吗 |
| [05:00] | But teaching there was my dream job! | 可是教书是我理想工作啊 |
| [05:02] | And you guys are my only friends. | 你们是我唯一的一帮朋友呀 |
| [05:04] | You all hate me? | 你们都讨厌我吗 |
| [05:07] | Can I at least say good-bye to all my kids? | 至少让我跟我的学生们告别一下吧 |
| [05:09] | My kids all hate me?! | 我的学生也都讨厌我吗 |
| [05:14] | Oh! | 哦 |
| [05:16] | Oh. It’s okay. | 哦 没事的 |
| [05:19] | So, what were we about to do? | 对了 我们一会儿要做什么来着 |
| [05:23] | I think it was “Meaningless” Something? | 我记得好像是”毫无意义的”什么来着 |
| [05:26] | Meaningless socks? No. | 毫无意义的袜子吗 不对 |
| [05:28] | No, it wasn’t meaningless socks. | 不是毫无意义的袜子 |
| [05:30] | Hey, hi, hi, hi. | 嘿 嗨 嗨 嗨 |
| [05:32] | Um, so, a little problem. | 有个小问题 |
| [05:34] | I was trying really hard not to offend your minister… | 我刚才正努力不冒犯你们的牧师 |
| [05:38] | So how did you and your husband meet? | 那你和你丈夫是怎么认识的 |
| [05:42] | Oh, it was our first week of college. | 哦 是在大学的第一周 |
| [05:45] | I needed help hooking up my stereo, | 我需要找人帮我修音响 |
| [05:47] | so I walked down the hall, and I just knew | 我走过走廊 仿佛早已知道 |
| [05:51] | I should knock on this one door. | 自己应该去敲那一扇门 |
| [05:52] | Marshall opened it. | 开门的正是马修 |
| [05:54] | It was destiny. | 这就是命中注定 |
| [05:55] | -Hi. -Hi. | -嗨 -嗨 |
| [05:57] | We’ve been together ever since. | 从那时起我们一直在一起 |
| [06:01] | Excuse me! | 不好意思 |
| [06:04] | What did I do wrong? | 我做错了什么 |
| [06:06] | What did you do wrong? | 你们做错了什么 |
| [06:09] | We really wanted him to marry us. | 我们真的很想让他来为我们证婚 |
| [06:12] | His church has cute coming out the wazoo, | 他的教堂有一个漂亮的后庭 |
| [06:14] | but when we met with him… | 但我们找到他的时候 |
| [06:16] | No pets in my church. | 我的教堂里禁止宠物 |
| [06:18] | No casual attire in my church. | 我的教堂里禁止休闲装 |
| [06:20] | No gum. No sports logos… | 禁止口香糖 禁止运动标志 |
| [06:24] | Reverend? More like Never-end. | 牧师 不如改叫没事找事 |
| [06:25] | -Prayer-five. -No shouting. No cell phones. | -祈祷击掌 -禁止大喊大叫 禁止使用手机 |
| [06:28] | I’ll warn you | 我先警告你们 |
| [06:29] | that I turn down most wedding requests. | 我拒绝掉了大多数结婚请求 |
| [06:32] | Particularly from boozy, promiscuous Manhattanites | 特别是那些混乱的曼哈顿醉鬼 |
| [06:36] | who only want me to marry them because | 那群人想让我来证婚只是因为 |
| [06:38] | my church has “Cute coming out the wazoo.” | 我的教堂有个”漂亮的后庭” |
| [06:43] | That is the total opposite of us. | 这跟我们完全相反 |
| [06:46] | People are like that? | 居然有人会那样 |
| [06:49] | Well, then, how did you two meet? | 好了 那 你们是怎么认识的 |
| [06:50] | Oh, um, um… | 哦 呃… |
| [06:53] | Um… | 呃… |
| [06:54] | Uh, we’ve been… dating since college. | 我们从…大学就开始交往了 |
| [06:57] | We met the very first week. | 从第一周就认识了 |
| [06:59] | I needed help hooking up my stereo, | 我需要找人帮我修音响 |
| [07:02] | so I walked down the hall, and I just knew | 我走过走廊 仿佛早已知道 |
| [07:05] | that I should knock on this one door. | 自己应该去敲那一扇门 |
| [07:07] | I opened the door. | 开门的就是我 |
| [07:09] | And it was destiny. | 这就是命中注定 |
| [07:13] | Hi. | 嗨 |
| [07:14] | Hi. | 嗨 |
| [07:16] | We’ve been together ever since! | 从那时起我们一直在一起×2 |
| [07:18] | You stole our story of how we met?! | 你们居然剽窃了我们相遇的故事 |
| [07:21] | We had to! Your story is so sweet! | 我们没办法 你们的故事太甜蜜了 |
| [07:23] | You didn’t even kiss till the third date. | 你们甚至直到第三次约会才接吻 |
| [07:25] | By our third date, I’d hit more bases | 我们的第三次约会 我的上垒次数已经比 |
| [07:27] | -than Bob Hope on a USO tour. -Topical. | -二战劳军巡演中的鲍勃•霍普还多了 -某些地区而已 |
| [07:27] | 鲍勃•霍普 上世纪40年代美国著名喜剧电影演员 USO 美国劳军联合组织 | |
| [07:29] | Now Reverend Lowell knows that we lied to him. | 现在洛厄尔牧师知道我们在撒谎了 |
| [07:32] | What if he cancels our wedding? | 万一他取消我们的婚礼怎么办 |
| [07:34] | What? That’s ridiculous. | 什么 那也太可笑了 |
| [07:36] | Barney, Robin, I need to speak | 巴尼 罗宾 我需要马上 |
| [07:37] | with you in private immediately. | 跟你们单独谈谈 |
| [07:40] | And it’s not just losing my job, | 我不止丢了工作 |
| [07:42] | my car just got stolen with all my stuff in it. | 我的车还被偷了 里面有我所有的东西 |
| [07:45] | And now I think I’m getting the flu! | 而且我觉得我好像感冒了 |
| [07:47] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [07:49] | I’ve been talking for, like, a half an hour. | 我好像已经自言自语半小时了 |
| [07:51] | It’s fine. 40 minutes. It’s fine. | 没关系 40分钟呢 不过没关系 |
| [07:53] | Still, I think I would be able to handle all of this | 不过 我觉得我还是能撑住的 |
| [07:56] | if my boyfriend Wesley hadn’t just broken up with me! | 要不是我男朋友韦斯利刚刚跟我分手了 |
| [08:10] | Why don’t you tell me about it? | 要不你给我讲讲他吧 |
| [08:12] | Okay! I should go back to the beginning. | 好 我从头开始讲吧 |
| [08:15] | Oh, no, before the beginning. | 不不 从最初的最初开始讲 |
| [08:17] | Winter, 1998… | 1998年的冬天… |
| [08:18] | Man, this girl is a drag! | 天啊 这妹子就是个累赘 |
| [08:20] | If I hurry, I bet I still have a shot with Sophia. | 我如果速战速决 说不定还有机会去找索菲亚 |
| [08:24] | Okay, I’ll get one more drink with Cassie, then bail. | 好 我再跟卡茜喝一杯 就溜 |
| [08:26] | But where, bar or dining room? | 去哪儿喝呢 吧台还是餐厅呢 |
| [08:28] | Bar or dining room? | 吧台还是餐厅 |
| [08:30] | For my fourth date with Wesley, we went… | 在我和韦斯利的第四次约会上 我们… |
| [08:32] | Cassie, let’s get one more drink in the dining room. | 卡茜 我们再去餐厅喝一杯吧 |
| [08:36] | You chose… | 你的选择… |
| [08:39] | Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad! | 嗨 妈妈 嗨 爸爸 |
| [08:41] | Hey! We just ordered appetizers. | 嘿 我们刚点完前餐 |
| [08:43] | Sit down, you two! | 坐下吧你俩 |
| [08:45] | …Ha-poorly! | 哈 弱爆了 |
| [08:50] | Marshall, you’re walking into the biggest fight of your life. | 马修 你正走向你人生中最大的争执 |
| [08:53] | You have to be prepared. You have to be tough. | 你得有所准备 你得变得强势 |
| [08:55] | -I am tough! -No, you’re not. | -我很强势 -不 你没有 |
| [08:57] | You make some good points. | 你说的很有道理 |
| [08:58] | Now, what exactly are you gonna say to Lily | 现在说说 你具体会跟莉莉说些什么 |
| [09:00] | when you walk through that door? | 从走进那扇门开始 |
| [09:01] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [09:03] | Hey, baby. | 嘿 亲爱的 |
| [09:04] | So, listen, I got this phone call… | 听着 我接到一个电话 |
| [09:05] | Whoa, whoa, whoa! | 喔 喔 喔 |
| [09:07] | You haven’t seen her in a week. | 你已经整整一周没见到她了 |
| [09:08] | Where’s the “I missed you”? How about a kiss? | “我好想你”哪儿去了 接吻哪儿去了 |
| [09:10] | Nothing about her new hairstyle? | 对她的新发型只字不提吗 |
| [09:12] | Hairstyle? I can’t actually see… | 发型 我又没法看到… |
| [09:14] | Start over! | 重来 |
| [09:15] | Lily! Hi. | 莉莉 嗨 |
| [09:17] | Mmm. | 嗯 |
| [09:19] | I missed you. | 我好想你 |
| [09:20] | And your hairstyle so much. | 还有你的新发型 |
| [09:22] | I missed you, too. | 我也好想你 |
| [09:23] | I can’t wait to show you how much in bed tonight. | 我真是等不及今晚的床上运动了 |
| [09:27] | Okay, that’s creepy. | 好吧 这有点吓人了 |
| [09:28] | Don’t break character. | 别切断代入 |
| [09:29] | Okay, um… | 好吧 呃 |
| [09:31] | So, listen, I got this phone call last week, and I… | 听着 我上周接到一个电话 我… |
| [09:33] | Whoa, whoa, whoa! | 喔 喔 喔 |
| [09:35] | Acknowledge her own views on the matter first. | 先从她的角度说说这件事 |
| [09:37] | Start over. | 重来 |
| [09:39] | Lily, hi, mwah. | 莉莉嗨么么哒 |
| [09:40] | I missed you and your hairstyle so much. | 我好想你和你的新发型 |
| [09:42] | I missed you, too. | 我也好想你 |
| [09:43] | Okay, so, I know that you’re excited for Rome. | 好吧 我知道你对罗马特别期待 |
| [09:46] | I’m more excited for bed tonight. | 我对今晚的床上运动更期待 |
| [09:49] | While I was away, uh, I got a phone call. | 我在明尼苏达的时候 接到了一个电话 |
| [09:53] | To be a judge. | 要我做一名法官 |
| [09:54] | What the damn hell?! | 你他妈在搞毛 |
| [09:56] | Whoa, whoa, whoa! | 打住 打住 打住 |
| [09:57] | Lily does not say “What the damn hell.” | 莉莉才不会说”你他妈在搞毛” |
| [09:59] | Well, I’ve never met her but, yes, she does. | 虽然我没见过她 但放心 她肯定会说 |
| [10:00] | Well, you make some good points. | 好吧 你说的很有道理 |
| [10:02] | Wow. You are terrible at this. | 哇 你对这种事还真是不在行啊 |
| [10:05] | Why did we lie? | 我们干嘛要撒谎啊 |
| [10:06] | We have to come clean. | 咱俩得把这件事跟他澄清了 |
| [10:08] | Frankly, I am appalled. | 坦白地说 我很震惊 |
| [10:10] | -I know. I… -Your friend | -我知道 我… -你们的朋友 |
| [10:12] | Lily just tried to pass off your sweet story | 莉莉竟然面不改色心不跳地把你们相遇的甜蜜故事 |
| [10:15] | of how you met as her own. | 硬是说成她自己的 |
| [10:19] | -That lying little tart! -I am horrified and relieved! | -这个信口雌黄的贱人 -我真是又震惊又松了口气 |
| [10:22] | Does Lily have any… problems that you’re aware of? | 你们知不知道莉莉是否有什么问题 |
| [10:26] | -Drinking. -Drugs. | -酗酒 -吸毒 |
| [10:27] | She’s been drinking drugs. | 她一直酗毒来着 |
| [10:31] | Well, I talked to Barney and Robin, | 我跟巴尼和罗宾谈过了 |
| [10:34] | and, let me say, I’m shocked. | 我想说 我很震惊 |
| [10:36] | You should be. | 不震惊就怪了 |
| [10:37] | Flat-out lying to me like that? | 就那样当着我的面睁眼说瞎话 |
| [10:39] | We are not misunderstanding each other. | 英雄所见略同啊 |
| [10:41] | How dare you pretend their beautiful story is actually your own. | 你怎么就敢把人家两个人相遇的美丽故事说成是你的呢 |
| [10:45] | Come again for Lil’ Fudge? | 再给小莉糖说一遍 |
| [10:47] | I understand the temptation. | 我明白那个故事有多么诱惑动人 |
| [10:48] | They’re such a sweet couple. | 人家两个是多么幸福的一对璧人 |
| [10:50] | I mean, the way they call each other | 你看他们给彼此起的昵称 |
| [10:51] | Barnmallow and Robinpad. | 巴甜甜 罗宾派 |
| [10:57] | Yes. | 可不是吗 |
| [10:58] | I do steal their stories. | 我的确是盗用了他俩的故事 |
| [11:00] | -Mm-hmm. -But only because | -承认了就好 -但这都是因为 |
| [11:02] | my husband and I | 我跟我老公 |
| [11:03] | are so ashamed of how we met. | 对我俩相遇的故事实在感到羞耻 |
| [11:06] | See, we only met because his friend Ted | 是这样 我俩能相遇都是因为我老公的朋友 |
| [11:09] | fell in love with me. | 泰德爱上了我 |
| [11:11] | And who could blame him? | 但谁能怪他呢 |
| [11:12] | Hey, Marshall. | 嘿 马修 |
| [11:14] | See that girl? | 看到那姑娘没 |
| [11:15] | Oh, yeah. You just know she likes it dirty. | 嗯 好一个风流的女人 |
| [11:18] | Go say hi. | 去打个招呼 |
| [11:19] | What? I can’t just go say hi. I-I need a plan. | 什么 不能只是去打个招呼 我需要一个计划 |
| [11:21] | Hmm. | 可不是 |
| [11:22] | I’m gonna wait until she goes to the bathroom… | 我应该等到她去厕所的时候… |
| [11:23] | Hi. | 嗨 |
| [11:24] | Have you met Ted? | 你见过泰德吗 |
| [11:26] | I’m sorry, | 对不起 |
| [11:28] | I can’t… | 我把持不住 |
| [11:30] | And now, after years of lying, | 现在呢 年年复年年的谎言 |
| [11:31] | cheating and backsliding, | 背叛和旧情复燃之后 |
| [11:32] | here we are, married! | 我们俩 结婚了 |
| [11:34] | But what can I say? | 但是我能说什么呢 |
| [11:35] | My husband’s a sociopath | 说我老公是个上过一百多 |
| [11:37] | who’s slept with over a hundred women, | 浪女的的神经病 |
| [11:39] | and I’m a slut who once let my boss feel me up. | 还有我是个曾经被自己老板上过的荡妇 |
| [11:42] | Oh, come on! | 快打住吧 |
| [11:43] | -I felt him up! -It is over 250 women! | -是老娘上的他好嘛 -明明是250多个好嘛 |
| [11:45] | If you two want to get married in my church, | 你们俩要是想在我的教堂举行婚礼 |
| [11:47] | you’ll stop breaking the ninth commandment. | 你们就必须停止违反第九诫 |
| [11:49] | Uh… no fat chicks? | 那是…胖妞不可上 |
| [11:51] | Thou shalt not lie! | 不可说谎 |
| [11:53] | With fat chicks? | 骗胖妞吗 |
| [11:55] | You’re killing me. You’re killing me. | 你们真是要命 要我的命 |
| [11:57] | Now that… | 这个 |
| [11:58] | was a good dessert. | 是个超好吃的甜点 |
| [12:00] | “Dessert” Sounds like “Desert.” | “甜点”听起来好像”沙漠” |
| [12:03] | The desert has sand… | 沙漠里有沙子 |
| [12:06] | there’s sand at the beach… | 沙滩上也有沙子 |
| [12:08] | and Wesley and I | 而我和韦斯利 |
| [12:10] | once drove by a beach. | 有一次开车经过一片沙滩 |
| [12:14] | Excuse me. | 失陪一下 |
| [12:18] | Now’s my chance to leave. | 此刻是我闪人的大好时机 |
| [12:19] | No, I’ll wait five more seconds | 不行 再多等五秒 |
| [12:21] | so I don’t seem too eager. | 这样可以显得我没那么猴急 |
| [12:22] | Four… | |
| [12:23] | three… | |
| [12:24] | two… | |
| [12:25] | Well, thanks for keeping our daughter company. | 啊 多谢你陪着我们家闺女 |
| [12:27] | Man, she can be a real drag, huh? | 老天 她可真是累赘 是吧 |
| [12:29] | We’re gonna go have a little fun. See ya! | 我俩现在要去开心一下 回见了您呐 |
| [12:34] | You’re on fire tonight, bro. | 哥们 你今晚真是连中啊 |
| [12:38] | But, Lily, being a judge is my dream job. | 但是莉莉 我做梦都想做个法官啊 |
| [12:41] | So your dream job | 所以你的理想工作 |
| [12:42] | is more important than my dream job? | 比我的理想工作要重要咯 |
| [12:44] | Exactly. Now you’re getting it. | 没有错 现在你明白了吧 |
| [12:46] | Nope. | 明白个屁 |
| [12:47] | Start over. | 重来 |
| [12:48] | So your dream job’s | 所以你的理想工作 |
| [12:50] | more important than my dream job? | 比我的理想工作要重要咯 |
| [12:51] | But, baby, you already have the best job in the world: | 但是宝贝 你已经拥有了世界上最好的工作了啊 |
| [12:54] | -Mom. -Nope. | -母亲 -母亲个屁 |
| [12:56] | Start over. | 重来 |
| [12:57] | So your dream job’s more important | 所以你的理想工作比我的理想工作 |
| [12:58] | than my dream job? | 更重要咯 |
| [13:00] | Hey, I gave up peeing in the shower for you. | 别不知足啊你 为了你我洗澡的时候都不嘘嘘了 |
| [13:03] | Nope. | 嘘嘘个屁 |
| [13:04] | Start over. | 重来 |
| [13:05] | So your dream job’s | 也就是说你的梦想工作 |
| [13:06] | more important than my dream job? | 比我的梦想工作要重要咯 |
| [13:08] | Of course not. | 当然不是 |
| [13:09] | But this isn’t | 但这不仅仅 |
| [13:10] | just about our future. | 关乎我们的未来 |
| [13:12] | It’s about everyone’s. | 这关乎所有人 |
| [13:14] | As a lawyer, | 作为律师 |
| [13:15] | I couldn’t stop big oil from polluting, | 我没法让大油霸们不再污染环境 |
| [13:16] | but as a judge… | 但作为法官 |
| [13:18] | well, maybe I can. | 我或许可以 |
| [13:19] | And that’s why I took the job. | 所以我才接下了这份工作 |
| [13:22] | You’ve just been “Convincered.” | 你已经被我”说服”了哟 |
| [13:23] | Wait. | 等下 |
| [13:24] | You already took the job? | 你已经接受这份工作了 |
| [13:26] | Without even talking to your wife? | 连跟你老婆说一声都没有吗 |
| [13:28] | Start over. | 重来 |
| [13:29] | Start over… start over. | 重来 快重来 |
| [13:31] | What the damn hell?! | 你他妈在搞毛 |
| [13:34] | Hi, Reverend Lowell? | 你好 洛厄尔牧师吗 |
| [13:36] | Whew. Made it through my half. | 呼 我的部分搞定了 |
| [13:38] | You’re up. | 该你了 |
| [13:39] | Oh. Uh… | 是这样的 |
| [13:41] | The-the truth is, we-we have | 事实是 我们有着 |
| [13:43] | a complicated, messy history | 复杂而又凌乱的过去 |
| [13:45] | that-that we’re not too proud of. | 我们并不为之骄傲 |
| [13:46] | But… | 只是 |
| [13:48] | we’re sorry that we lied, | 我们很抱歉我们说了谎 |
| [13:49] | and hope that you can forgive us. | 希望你能原谅我们 |
| [13:55] | Nope, I can’t do it. | 不 我做不到 |
| [13:57] | You’re going to have to find a new officiant. | 你们得另外找个司仪了 |
| [13:59] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [14:01] | Well, these things happen. | 唉 该来的还是会来的 |
| [14:02] | And a new church. | 再另找一个教堂 |
| [14:03] | What the damn hell?! | 你他妈在搞毛 |
| [14:06] | This evening could not get any worse. | 今晚已经烂到不能再烂了 |
| [14:09] | -Whenever you’re ready. -Crap! | -客人请自便 -大爷的 |
| [14:13] | Hey, Ted. | 嘿 泰德 |
| [14:14] | Thanks for being so great. | 谢谢你对我这么好 |
| [14:16] | I’m lucky to have you around this weekend. | 这周末能有你在身边 实在是太幸运了 |
| [14:18] | Ooh, yeah… | 呃 怎么说呢 |
| [14:20] | About that… | 是这样的 |
| [14:22] | I should really go see about the, uh… | 我现在得去看下… 那个… |
| [14:25] | -So, sex? -My room is very close. | -滚床单去吗 -我房间很近的 |
| [14:28] | Sophia. Hi. | 索菲亚 好啊 |
| [14:29] | Oh, God. Wesley. | 天啊 韦斯利 |
| [14:31] | Wait. Wait, you’re Wesley? | 等下 等下 你就是韦斯利 |
| [14:33] | Hey, Cassie. | 你好 卡茜 |
| [14:35] | Your parents were just saying you have a new boyfriend. | 你爸妈说你刚刚交了个新男朋友 |
| [14:37] | “Boyfriend” is a little premature. | “男朋友”这称呼 早了点的说 |
| [14:39] | Though I did pay for dinner. | 虽说我刚付了晚饭钱 |
| [14:40] | Ted and I are very happy. | 泰德和我都非常开心 |
| [14:43] | Are we? | 有吗 |
| [14:44] | Even if… he’ll never replace you. | 尽管 他永远都取代不了你 |
| [14:52] | So, Sophia. Hi. | 索菲亚 你好呀 |
| [14:53] | I’m Ted. | 我是泰德 |
| [14:54] | Robin’s friend. | 罗宾的朋友 |
| [14:56] | What do you say we give these two old flames | 你说 我们让这两位旧爱 |
| [14:58] | a chance to… catch up alone, | 先叙叙旧 你看如何 |
| [15:00] | and maybe you and I could go get a drink. | 然后你和我 去喝一杯 |
| [15:01] | -Are you hitting on me? -Dude! | -你在跟我调情吗 -喂喂 |
| [15:03] | Ted, let’s go! | 泰德 我们走 |
| [15:08] | You tip… | 你的小费… |
| [15:12] | …poorly. | 抠爆了 |
| [15:17] | Look, I know. I shouldn’t have taken the job | 好啦 我知道 我应该先跟莉莉谈谈 |
| [15:20] | without telling Lily. | 再接下那份工作 |
| [15:21] | Why are you so ticked off about it? | 但你这么忿忿不平的又是为何 |
| [15:22] | Because I know what she’s going through. | 因为我知道这对她来说意味着什么 |
| [15:25] | I always dreamed | 我曾一直梦想着 |
| [15:26] | of having a career I could be proud of, | 我能有一份值得骄傲的事业 |
| [15:28] | but my husband never supported me. | 但我老公从来就不支持我 |
| [15:30] | Eventually, | 到最后 |
| [15:31] | I had to… make a choice. | 我必须要做出取舍 |
| [15:34] | Now, every day, I’m out there, | 现在 我每一天 |
| [15:36] | I’m fighting for the good guys, and I love it. | 都在为正义不断战斗着 并且乐在其中 |
| [15:40] | Doesn’t your wife deserve that, too? | 这不也是你妻子应该得到的吗 |
| [15:41] | Wow. Um, maybe you’re right. | 唔 你也许是对的 |
| [15:46] | I didn’t realize how many sacrifices you’d made. | 我不知道你竟然牺牲了这么多 |
| [15:50] | What is it you do, anyway? | 总之 你是做什么的 |
| [15:51] | I’m a lobbyist for a big oil company. | 我在给某个大油霸当说客 |
| [15:53] | What the damn hell?! | 你他妈在搞毛 |
| [15:57] | You know that I’m an environmentalist! | 你明明知道我是环保主义者 |
| [15:58] | That’s why you don’t want me to become a judge. | 怪不得你不想要我当法官 |
| [16:00] | But you’re the reason I have to become a judge! | 但因为你 我这法官还就非当不可了 |
| [16:02] | You’re the devil incarnate! And outcarnate! | 你就是恶魔的化身 再加真身 |
| [16:04] | Every kind of carnate! | 外加不管什么身 |
| [16:08] | Please, is-is there | 求你了 就没有 |
| [16:09] | any way you’d reconsider? | 什么办法通融一下吗 |
| [16:10] | No! No, no! | 不 不可能 |
| [16:12] | You two are both terrible people. | 你们俩都是大烂人 |
| [16:14] | Who found each other in this crazy world! | 在这疯狂世界中找到彼此的大烂人啊 |
| [16:17] | Aw! | 嗷呜 |
| [16:19] | And who lie about how they found each other. | 连怎么找到彼此都要说谎吗 |
| [16:21] | So, please leave now. Just… | 走吧 滚吧 就… |
| [16:23] | Ugh! Ugh! | 真晦气 |
| [16:26] | You know what? You’re right. | 我告诉你 你还真说对了 |
| [16:28] | We shouldn’t have lied about our story. | 我们是不该编造我们的故事 |
| [16:31] | I love our story. | 我深深爱着我们的故事 |
| [16:32] | Sure, it’s messy, but it’s the story | 虽然它真的很混乱 但就是这个故事 |
| [16:34] | that got us here, about to get married. | 一步步把我们带到今天 即将步入婚姻 |
| [16:37] | I love it, too. | 我也爱这个故事 |
| [16:39] | Every messy chapter. | 每个混乱的章节 |
| [16:41] | I love that you slept with over 250 women | 我爱你睡了超过250个女人之后 |
| [16:43] | before deciding that I was your favorite. | 确定我是你的最爱 |
| [16:46] | This is killing me. | 杀了我得了 |
| [16:47] | And I love that we just had to keep having sex with each other, | 我爱我们一直都要跟对方爱爱 |
| [16:50] | even when we were dating other people. | 即使我们在跟别人约会也不停歇 |
| [16:51] | This is really killing me. | 真的杀了我得了 |
| [16:53] | And I love that your marriage proposal involved a strip club, lying to me, | 我爱你的求婚中包括脱衣舞俱乐部 欺骗我 |
| [16:57] | and pretending to bang the woman I hate for two months. | 假装和我超恨的女人搞了两个月 |
| [17:01] | I love that we keep a running tally | 我爱我们有个清单用来记录 |
| [17:02] | of all the different rooms we’ve had sex in. | 我们做过的不同房间 |
| [17:04] | I love that two weeks ago, we put this room on that list. | 我爱两周以前 我们把这个房间加进了清单里 |
| [17:07] | Huh? Come on, Rev. | 怎么样啊 牧师大人 |
| [17:09] | That’s got to be worth some kind of reaction, right? | 此处应该有掌声 对吧 |
| [17:11] | I mean, right where your hymnal is, is where we… | 就在你放赞美诗的那里 我们… |
| [17:13] | we… | 我们… |
| [17:30] | Well, that’s not what you want. | 这可不是咱想要的结果 |
| [17:38] | Um, are… are you okay? | 呃 你还好吗 |
| [17:40] | I think… think maybe seeing your ex was a bit much for you. | 遇到前任 对你来说可能太沉重了吧 |
| [17:43] | No. Not at all. | 不 一点都不 |
| [17:46] | I want… only you. | 我只想要你 |
| [17:48] | Oh, yeah. | 来吧 |
| [17:49] | I want to… I want to rock your world. | 我要 我要爽飞你的世界 |
| [17:53] | And you’re so hot. | 你好性感你好棒 |
| [17:55] | I want to ride you like a bronco. | 我要把你当野马一样骑 |
| [17:59] | Okay, Cassie. Cassie. | 好了 卡茜 卡茜啊喂 |
| [18:01] | Yeah, we… we can’t do this. | 我们不能这么来 |
| [18:03] | I mean, you’re crying. | 你可是在哭啊 |
| [18:06] | And contagious. | 而且还可能传染我 |
| [18:07] | You’re-you’re having a really, really bad week. | 你正在经历凄惨至极的一周啊 |
| [18:10] | I think… I think you should just take it easy. | 我觉得 你还是放轻松点吧 |
| [18:14] | You’re right. | 你说的对 |
| [18:15] | -I’m not in a good place. -No. | -我现在状态确实不好 -是啊 |
| [18:18] | Oh, wow. | 喔哦 |
| [18:19] | I probably would have let you do all sorts of crazy things to me. | 我差点就可能任你摆布 任你蹂躏了 |
| [18:27] | Exactly. | 太对了 |
| [18:29] | I release you. | 我放过你了 |
| [18:31] | Go have fun this weekend. | 去享受这个周末吧 |
| [18:33] | Meet someone else. | 祝你遇见别人 |
| [18:35] | Yes! Yes! Be cool. | 好耶好耶 镇定一点 |
| [18:37] | Okay. But I couldn’t meet someone else. | 好吧 我没能遇见别人 |
| [18:39] | Hey, Ted? | 嘿 泰德 |
| [18:41] | Everyone here is saying | 大家都在说 |
| [18:42] | you and Cassie are the couple of the weekend. | 你和卡茜是这周末的模范情侣哦 |
| [18:44] | How great is that? | 超棒的是不是 |
| [18:45] | Barney was right. | 巴尼说的对 |
| [18:47] | I’d chosen poorly, everyone had seen us together, | 我的选择弱爆了 所有人都看见我和卡茜在一起了 |
| [18:50] | and now the whole weekend seemed lost. | 整个周末似乎都看起来无望了 |
| [18:52] | Until… | 直到 |
| [18:55] | Hi. I just got here. | 嗨 我刚到这里 |
| [18:57] | Did I miss anything? | 我错过什么了吗 |
| [18:59] | Not at all. Grace, right? | 什么都没错过 格蕾丝 对吧 |
| [19:02] | I’m Ted. Let’s get you a drink before you talk to anyone else | 我是泰德 在你见到任何人听到任何话之前 |
| [19:05] | or hear anything. | 我先带你去喝一杯吧 |
| [19:09] | Hey, guys. How’s your night going? | 嘿 伙计们 今晚怎么样 |
| [19:10] | Ugh! | 唉 |
| [19:12] | Our minister just died. | 我们的牧师刚才去世了 |
| [19:13] | We can still use the church, | 我们仍然可以用教堂 |
| [19:15] | but we only have two days to find a new officiant. | 只是我们只有两天的时间来找一个新的司仪了 |
| [19:17] | Unless… | 除非… |
| [19:19] | Wedding at Bernie’s! | «老板去结婚» |
| [19:20] | We’re not doing Wedding at Bernie’s! | 我们不会用«老板去结婚»的 |
| [19:21] | Wow. Oh, that’s terrible. | 哇 这太严重了吧 |
| [19:24] | Should I make a toast in his honor? | 我要为他致辞祭奠一下吗 |
| [19:26] | No. | 不要 |
| [19:28] | Of course I should. | 我当然要啦 |
| [19:30] | Everyone? | 在场各位 |
| [19:32] | To Reverend Lowell. | 致 牧师洛厄尔 |
| [19:33] | He may have passed away tonight, but he will always… | 今夜 他虽离我们而去 但他的音容笑貌… |
| [19:37] | Uncle Robert died?! | 罗伯特叔叔去世了吗 |
| [19:39] | Oh, no. | 哦 不 |
| [19:50] | Have a nice weekend. | 周末愉快 |
| [19:51] | All that night, I did nothing but choose poorly. | 整个晚上 我除了做弱爆的选择 一无所获 |
| [19:54] | But thanks to Cassie, | 但是多亏了卡茜 |
| [19:56] | I didn’t get together with anyone at that wedding. | 我才没有在婚礼上钓到任何妹子 |
| [19:58] | And if I had, | 如果我钓到了 |
| [20:00] | well, then, your mother and I might never have met. | 我和你们的妈妈就永远不会相遇了 |
| [20:04] | So, maybe, in a way, I chose wisely. | 所以也许从另一种角度看 我的选择碉堡了 |
| [20:11] | Although, it sure as heck didn’t feel like it at the time. | 当然那时候的我可真特么不是那感觉 |
| [20:17] | She chose… | 她的选择… |
| [20:19] | Wesley. | 是韦斯利 |
| [20:22] | I’ve been dying to say that one all night. | 我终于能玩一次这个梗了 |
| [20:26] | Look, I’m sorry I yelled at you. | 听着 很抱歉我吼了你 |
| [20:28] | The truth is, you’re right. | 其实 你是对的 |
| [20:29] | It was wrong of me to take that job without telling Lily. | 不告诉莉莉就接受那份工作 是我错了 |
| [20:32] | I don’t need to be tough with her. I need to be fair. | 我不要对她义正言辞 我想要公平协商 |
| [20:35] | Thanks, Marshall. | 谢谢你 马修 |
| [20:37] | I should also apologize. | 我也需要向你道歉 |
| [20:39] | While you were filling the tank, | 在你给车加油的时候 |
| [20:41] | I may have been so angry, | 我有点怒火中烧 |
| [20:44] | I texted your wife with the news that you took that judge offer. | 就发短信告诉了你老婆 你已经接受了法官工作的事 |
| [20:52] | Don’t forget to compliment her hair. | 别忘了夸她发型好看 |
| [21:01] | On the next episode of How I Met Your Mother. | «老爸老妈浪漫史»下集预告 |
| [21:03] | Next Monday, at this country inn, | 北京时间下周二 就在这家乡村旅店 |
| [21:09] | strange doings are at once. | 诡异事件即将上演 |
| [21:11] | We’re stucked in the room with a ghost in it. | 我们住的房间在闹鬼 |
| [21:13] | And strange people are doing strange things. | 怪人也开始做怪事 |
| [21:16] | Barney, did you swallow real versions of all the light charm items? | 巴尼 你把真的灯光道具全给吞了吗 |
| [21:19] | I used to win fifty bucks from an Irish guy name Dare. | 我以前从一个叫戴尔的爱尔兰人手里赢过50块钱 |
| [21:21] | On new How I Met Your Mother next Monday. | 更多精彩 敬请期待北京时间下周二«老爸老妈浪漫史» |