| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | Neither of you were here | 你们都没有经历过 |
| [00:06] | for the Pickle Wiggle fiasco of 1993. | 1993年”摇摆酸果玩具”的惨败 |
| [00:09] | Picture that thing, but vibrating | 想象一下 那个东西 |
| [00:11] | at the bottom of a cereal box. | 在麦片盒子底部震动的画面 |
| [00:13] | I wanna see a place that makes Mom so happy, | 我想看看那个能让妈妈开心到 |
| [00:14] | she’d choose that over us. | 放弃我们的地方 |
| [00:15] | The show is a trap. | 这个节目就是个圈套 |
| [00:17] | You are a terrible father! | 你这个父亲真是糟透了 |
| [00:18] | Would you please say something, | 你能不能说句话 |
| [00:20] | anything, please? | 什么都行 好不好 |
| [00:21] | Murderer! | 凶手 |
| [00:22] | You killed the magic! | 你扼杀了魔法 |
| [00:24] | Murderer! Murderer! | 凶手 凶手 |
| [00:30] | Breakfast is so boring! | 早餐太无聊了 |
| [00:32] | – Think again, kids. – Fortissimo! | – 那你们可错了 孩子们 – 嘹亮奏响吧 |
| [00:35] | Maestro Pimento Fermata! | 皮门托·费尔马塔音乐大师 |
| [00:37] | What are you doing here? | 你在这儿做什么 |
| [00:39] | Who is ready for some breakfast-a música? | 准备好参加早餐音乐会了吗 |
| [00:44] | Wow! Awesome! | 哇 太酷了 |
| [00:46] | Allora… now you can be like the maestro | 阿洛拉 现在你可以像音乐大师一样 |
| [00:48] | and start your own choir | 成立自己的合唱团啦 |
| [00:50] | by collecting all four Pickle Wigglers. | 只需要集齐四个摇摆酸果 |
| [00:57] | And even more good news! | 还有更好的消息呢 |
| [00:59] | Best-O’s is molto healthy for your body. | 超棒谷物麦片非常有益身体健康 |
| [01:02] | Mom, there’s no added sugar! | 妈妈 这里不添加糖分 |
| [01:04] | – Oh? – Mom, there’s no artificial colors! | – 是吗 – 妈妈 这里未添加人工色素 |
| [01:07] | – Oh? – Mom, there’s no artificial flavors! | – 真的吗 – 妈妈 这里未添加人工香料 |
| [01:10] | Oh? Best-O’s Cereal. | 这么棒吗 超棒谷物麦片 |
| [01:13] | The cereal that makes you go… | 让你惊喜不断 情不自禁地… |
| [01:14] | oh! | 叫出来 |
| [01:26] | Clean up, aisle seven. | 七号货架通道需要清理 |
| [01:32] | What the fuck do they put in this shit? | 这破麦片有什么魔力吗 |
| [01:37] | Mom, there’s no toy in the box! | 妈妈 盒子里的玩具没了 |
| [01:40] | Ohh… oh! | 噢…噢 |
| [01:42] | Ohh… | 噢… |
| [02:01] | Dad, don’t hang up. | 爸 别挂电话 |
| [02:02] | I’m eating oatmeal. Stop calling. | 我吃麦片呢 别打电话了 |
| [02:04] | I haven’t seen him since the Philippines. | 从菲律宾回来后 我就没再见过他 |
| [02:06] | I don’t care. He’s an adult. He’ll come home. | 我不在乎 他是成年人了 会回家的 |
| [02:29] | Mom? | 妈妈 |
| [02:31] | Mom, I’m hungry. | 妈妈我饿了 |
| [02:34] | Oh, Jesus… | 噢 天哪 |
| [02:35] | Where’d it go? | 去哪了 |
| [02:37] | Where did it go? Where did it go? | 这玩意儿去哪了 |
| [02:43] | Why are you walking like that? | 你干嘛那样奇怪地走来走去 |
| [02:45] | Because this is how stressed-out people walk | 因为我压力奇大无比 |
| [02:48] | when their brothers go AWOL! | 尤其是我弟还在玩失踪 |
| [02:51] | What do I tell the Smithsonian | 如果他不出现的话 我要如何 |
| [02:53] | if he doesn’t show up? | 向史密森学会交代 |
| [02:54] | He’ll be there. | 他会去的 |
| [02:55] | He’s not going to miss | 他不会错过 |
| [02:56] | his own lifetime achievement award. | 他的终身成就奖的 |
| [02:58] | This is stale. | 麦片都有味了 |
| [03:00] | I’ve already lost twenty-four Mr. Pickleses. | 我已经失去二十四个酸果先生了 |
| [03:04] | I can’t lose 25. | 不能再失去一个 |
| [03:05] | Jeff lost his entire pickle family. | 杰夫失去了他的整个酸果家族 |
| [03:07] | He’s due some time on his own. | 理应有点自我调整的时间 |
| [03:09] | Maybe he finally… | 可能他终于决定… |
| [03:10] | Maddy. | 玛蒂 |
| [03:11] | That is insanely inappropriate. | 这样说太过分了 |
| [03:14] | – Go play with your axe. – It’s sleeping. | – 玩你的斧子去 – 它还在睡觉 |
| [03:16] | You don’t think this is my fault, do you? | 你是不是觉得这也是我的错 |
| [03:21] | Right, because everything’s my fault, | 一切都是我的错 |
| [03:23] | always my fault… just say it. | 永远都是我的错 你就直接说吧 |
| [03:25] | You regret putting me in charge, don’t you? | 你后悔让我接手公司了 对吧 |
| [03:28] | Just say it! | 直接说啊 |
| [03:31] | Say it! | 说啊 |
| [03:33] | Do you wish you only had one child? | 你是不是希望你只有一个孩子 |
| [03:35] | Tell me, honestly, right now. | 说真的 告诉我 马上 |
| [03:38] | I wanna hear it. It’s open season. | 我想听你说 今天就把话说清楚 |
| [03:44] | You are… unbelievable. | 你真是让人难以置信 |
| [03:48] | Maddy, get in the car. | 玛蒂 上车 |
| [03:50] | I wanna stay with Grandpa. | 可我想和外公待在一起 |
| [03:52] | Fine! | 好吧 |
| [03:55] | Forget it. | 不走拉倒 |
| [03:59] | Were you trying to talk just now, | 你刚刚是不是想说话 |
| [04:02] | but your brain wouldn’t let you? | 但脑子却不听使唤 |
| [04:04] | We need to go see a doctor right now. | 我们需要马上去看医生 |
| [04:17] | Hey! Where’s Jeff? | 杰夫去哪了 |
| [04:22] | What happens if he doesn’t show up? | 如果他不出席会发生什么 |
| [04:24] | Have you thought about that? | 你想过这个吗 |
| [04:40] | Are you kidding? You know what Kennedy’ll do? | 你在开玩笑吗 你知道肯尼迪会怎么做吗 |
| [04:44] | He’ll take this glad-ass economy we’re swimming in | 他会把我们所倚靠的大好经济 |
| [04:47] | and burn it to shit | 烧成灰烬 |
| [04:49] | with all those damn freebie programs he’s yawing about. | 用他一直胡扯的那些该死的免费项目毁掉一切 |
| [04:52] | At least he’s got what it takes | 至少他有能力 |
| [04:54] | to stand up to Khrushchev and the Reds. | 对抗赫鲁晓夫和苏联红军 |
| [04:57] | Are you telling jokes? | 你逗我呢 |
| [04:58] | Nixon’ll take a bite into Khrushchev’s thigh | 尼克松只会像只杜比犬一样 |
| [05:01] | and hold onto it forever like a Doberman Pincher! | 咬住赫鲁晓夫的大腿 吊着不松口 |
| [05:04] | It’s a Pinscher, not a Pincher. | 是杜宾犬 不是杜比犬 |
| [05:06] | – It’s Pincher. – Pinscher. | – 就是杜比 – 杜宾 |
| [05:08] | Larry, settle an argument. | 拉里 评个理 |
| [05:10] | Gladys. | 格拉迪斯 |
| [05:13] | What’d I tell you about opening the fridge? | 我和你说过不能开冷藏室吧 |
| [05:15] | Stay in front of the bar. | 请到吧台前面等着 |
| [05:19] | Kennedy’s a bootlegger… but I like a bootlegger. | 肯尼迪是个走私犯 但我喜欢走私犯 |
| [05:23] | Better than that war hawk Dick Nixon. | 总比好战分子迪克·尼克松强 |
| [05:25] | Larry served. | 拉里肯定服过役 |
| [05:26] | I was a sniper in Korea. | 我在朝鲜当过狙击手 |
| [05:28] | Took out a lotta bad guys. No big deal. | 干掉了一堆坏人 没什么大不了的 |
| [05:30] | Sure, Nixon’s a bullet pusher, | 当然 尼克松是个战争狂人 |
| [05:33] | but he’s a family man too. | 但他也是有家庭的男人 |
| [05:36] | You got kids, Larry? | 你有孩子吗 Larry |
| [05:38] | Phil, Will, Bill, Gil, Til, and Dill… | 菲尔 威尔 比尔 吉尔 提尔和迪尔 |
| [05:40] | all boys. | 全是男孩 |
| [05:41] | Larry with the strong semen! | 拉里的精子很强啊 |
| [05:44] | and they’re all gonna vote Nixon, Larry! | 他们都会给尼克松投票的 拉里 |
| [05:46] | Aw, come on! | 得了吧 |
| [05:47] | Larry, I’m still waitin’ on that Sidecar. | 拉里 我还等着上酒呢 |
| [05:49] | Sorry, Babs. | 抱歉 芭布斯 |
| [05:51] | Next one’s on the house. | 下一杯我请客 |
| [05:53] | You’re a prince, Larry. | 你简直是个王子 拉里 |
| [05:54] | Ha. Tell ya what. | 不如这样吧 |
| [05:56] | Next one’s on the house for everybody. | 所有人的下一杯 我都请了 |
| [05:59] | – Hey, Larry! – Larry! Larry! | – 拉里 – 拉里 拉里 |
| [06:02] | Larry, Larry! | 拉里 拉里 |
| [06:05] | – Larry, Larry! – I need a quick refill. | – 拉里 拉里 – 我再去续个酒 马上就回来 |
| [06:07] | Larry, Larry… | 拉里 拉里 |
| [06:11] | They’re dry as a bone out there. | 他们喝得贼快 一滴不剩 |
| [06:13] | Good. Ha. | 不错啊 |
| [06:15] | Let’s keep it that way. | 让他们接着喝吧 |
| [06:33] | You good, man? | 你还好吗 兄弟 |
| [06:37] | I should get going. | 我该回去了 |
| [06:41] | Do you wanna be buried, cremated, | 你想要土葬还是火葬 |
| [06:43] | – or drowned? – What? | – 还是水葬 – 什么 |
| [06:48] | Did you see that woman? | 你看见那个女人了吗 |
| [06:50] | – What woman? – It’s the strangest thing. | – 什么女人 – 真奇怪 |
| [06:54] | She looked exactly like my ex-wife… exactly. | 她长得简直和我前妻一模一样 |
| [06:57] | I thought you hated her. | 你不是很讨厌她吗 |
| [06:59] | I do. | 是啊 |
| [07:00] | I also love her. | 但是我也爱着她 |
| [07:02] | I get it. I really get it. | 我懂 我明白这种感觉 |
| [07:04] | Wait here. | 你在这呆一会 |
| [07:05] | Sebastian. | 塞巴斯蒂安 |
| [07:07] | Sorry to keep you waiting. | 不好意思 让您久等了 |
| [07:09] | I had a momentary inability to speak. | 我会间歇性地说不出话 |
| [07:13] | But everything feels tip-top now. | 但是现在又可以说得很流畅 |
| [07:15] | I’m afraid your blood work | 恐怕你的血检结果 |
| [07:16] | tells a complicated story of love and loss. | 诉说了一场痛失挚爱的故事 |
| [07:19] | – It does? – It does what? | – 你说得没错 – 什么没错 |
| [07:20] | I’m sorry. What did you say? | 抱歉 你刚刚说什么 |
| [07:23] | I said you’ve had a minor stroke. | 我说你之前经历了一次轻度中风 |
| [07:24] | Oh, well, well, that’s what I thought. | 我也是这么觉得的 |
| [07:27] | And you’re at risk for a major one. | 而且还有遭受更严重中风的风险 |
| [07:30] | – Should she be here? – She’s my nurse. | – 不该让孩子听这些吧 – 她是我的护士 |
| [07:33] | Maddy, do you wanna leave? | 玛蒂 你想先出去一下吗 |
| [07:35] | – No. – All right. | – 不想 – 好吧 |
| [07:37] | Your red blood cell count… it’s high. | 你的红细胞数量过高 |
| [07:40] | It’s like California and earthquakes. | 这就好像处于地震带上的加州 |
| [07:42] | The Big One could come tomorrow. | 谁也不知道明天会不会发生大地震 |
| [07:45] | Could be a week, a month. | 可能是一个星期 也可能是一个月 |
| [07:47] | – A year? – I didn’t say a year. | – 有可能是一年吗 – 没那么久 |
| [07:53] | Your heart sounds scared. | 你的心说它害怕了 |
| [07:57] | Hey, let’s just keep this our little secret, okay? | 把这当成我们之间的小秘密 好吗 |
| [08:01] | Pinky promise. | 拉钩 |
| [08:03] | Pinky promise. | 拉钩 |
| [08:05] | Is there a cure for dementia, | 有能治愈老年痴呆 |
| [08:07] | Alzheimer’s? No. | 或阿茨海默的药物吗 没有 |
| [08:10] | But can we treat it? Yes. | 但是能够缓解病情吗 这是可以的 |
| [08:13] | With quality memory care. | 我们有精心打造的记忆疗法 |
| [08:15] | Inside of these walls, it is 1960 all day, | 在这些房间里 时间永远定格在上世纪六十年代 |
| [08:19] | every day. | 每天如此 |
| [08:21] | Mickey Mantle bats for the Yankees | 米奇·曼托为洋基队奋力击球 |
| [08:23] | and Eisenhower sits in the Oval. | 艾森豪威尔还在担任美国总统 |
| [08:28] | Nostalgia therapy comforts the fragile mind | 这种怀旧疗法可以安抚老人敏感的内心 |
| [08:31] | from… from outbursts… | 避免情绪失控 |
| [08:34] | Could you excuse me for one second? | 不好意思 我失陪一下 |
| [08:36] | – Sure. – Thank you. | – 没事 – 谢谢 |
| [08:55] | What’s up, man? | 怎么了 兄弟 |
| [09:03] | – Can I stay a little longer? – You’re Jeff Pickles. | – 我能在这多待一会儿吗 – 你可是杰夫·皮克斯 |
| [09:05] | You can stay as long as you want. | 你想待多久都可以 |
| [09:07] | That’s not true, Cornell. | 不是这样的 康奈尔 |
| [09:09] | No, no, I really don’t mind. | 不 我真的不介意 |
| [09:11] | You should know by now | 你应该知道吧 |
| [09:12] | that visiting hours don’t apply to you. | 你没有探望时间的限制 |
| [09:14] | No, I mean you said I’m Jeff Pickles, but… | 不是 我说的是杰夫·皮克斯这件事 |
| [09:17] | he isn’t born for another eight years. | 按照那里的时间来算 我还要八年才能出生 |
| [09:21] | Have I shown you the bus stop? | 我带你看过公交站了吗 |
| [09:32] | It’s new since your last visit. | 这是在你上次到访之后才新建的 |
| [09:34] | Solved a big problem for us… | 帮我们解决了一个大问题 |
| [09:37] | what to do when a patient wants to leave. | 如果病人想要离开 该怎么办 |
| [09:40] | So now when they get that itch to go, | 现在 当他们想走的时候 |
| [09:43] | an aide comes and brings them to the bus stop, | 看护就把他们带到这个公交车站 |
| [09:46] | and they wait until they forget | 他们等着等着 就会忘掉 |
| [09:49] | why they wanted to leave in the first place. | 当初为什么想要离开 |
| [09:53] | And they just go right back inside. | 然后 他们就会自己回到屋里 |
| [09:59] | But don’t you feel like you’re lying | 但是 你不觉得你是在 |
| [10:01] | to the elderly and demented? | 欺骗这些老年痴呆症患者吗 |
| [10:03] | A lie is for you. | 对你来说 这是个谎言 |
| [10:06] | This is for them. | 对他们来说这就是现实 |
| [10:09] | We call it compassionate deception. | 我们把这个叫做善意的蒙骗 |
| [10:12] | But the bus will never come | 但是 公交车永远都不会来 |
| [10:14] | and she’ll never get to leave. | 她也永远都走不了 |
| [10:15] | And Larry’ll never get to vote for Nixon. | 虽然拉里不能把选票投给尼克松 |
| [10:18] | But he can make a mean mocktail. | 但在这里他可以做简陋版的无酒精鸡尾酒 |
| [10:20] | Most of the people who want to leave | 大多数想离开这里的人 |
| [10:22] | are trying to go somewhere that doesn’t exist anymore. | 脑海中的去处根本就不存在了 |
| [10:25] | Do we tell them the spouse they wanna get to | 我们难道要告诉他们 他们想去找的伴侣 |
| [10:29] | died 30 years ago | 三十年前就过世了吗 |
| [10:30] | or that their childhood home is now a Walmart? | 还是告诉他们 他们童年的故乡已经变成沃尔玛超市了 |
| [10:33] | Reality is the disease. | 对于他们 现实世界才是病源 |
| [10:35] | The fantasy is the pill. | 这里的虚拟生活才能帮助治疗 |
| [10:40] | So… | 所以说 |
| [10:41] | it’s not a lie if it heals. | 如果是为了治疗 就不算撒谎 |
| [10:43] | Exactly. | 没错 |
| [10:46] | Dad? | 爸爸 |
| [10:49] | Could you help me get ready? | 你能帮我系领带吗 |
| [10:51] | Sure, son. | 当然可以 儿子 |
| [11:09] | Since first meeting him | 我第一次见到他的时候 |
| [11:12] | as an OSU sophomore, | 他还是一名俄亥俄州立大学的大二学生 |
| [11:14] | I knew Jeff Pickles would go on | 但那时我就知道 杰夫·皮克斯 |
| [11:18] | to touch countless lives | 日后一定能影响这个世界上 |
| [11:21] | around the world. | 无数人的生活 |
| [11:23] | In that spirit, let us take a moment of silence | 秉持着这种精神 让我们为 |
| [11:27] | to honor Filipino Mr. Pickles | 被其自己的政府残忍谋害的 |
| [11:30] | who was brutally murdered by his own government. | 菲律宾酸果先生默哀并致敬 |
| [11:47] | We’ve been having some trouble | 如何卖掉隔壁那栋 |
| [11:49] | selling that sad, empty house next door, | 令人伤感又空荡荡的房子 一直困扰着我们 |
| [11:51] | but I think if we combine the two lots, | 但是我觉得如果我们把你家这块地 |
| [11:56] | yours and his, some happy person | 和隔壁的一起买下 也许就会有人愿意 |
| [11:59] | could build a spectacular Monterey Colonial. | 在这盖一座豪华的蒙特利殖民地风格的豪宅 |
| [12:02] | Wait, what… I would sell too? | 你说什么 你想把我家也卖了吗 |
| [12:05] | It’s time. Don’t you agree? | 也是时候了 不是吗 |
| [12:08] | Change! | 是时候改变了 |
| [12:09] | What’s a Monterey Colonial? | 什么是蒙特利殖民地风格 |
| [12:14] | Hold on. | 请等一下 |
| [12:17] | Hello? | 干嘛 |
| [12:18] | Can you come to where I am right now? | 你现在能过来吗 |
| [12:20] | I’m not going to that awards thing. | 我不会去那个颁奖典礼的 |
| [12:21] | Neither is Will. Stop asking. | 威尔也不会去 别再问了 |
| [12:24] | Deirdre? | 迪尔德丽 |
| [12:26] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [12:27] | – You called me. – Yes. | – 是你打的电话 有事快说 – 是的 |
| [12:29] | Did you hear what I said? | 你听到我说的话了吗 |
| [12:30] | I need immediate medical attention. | 我现在急需医疗救治 |
| [12:32] | Go to a hospital. | 去医院啊 |
| [12:34] | It’s a personal situation. Can you come here? | 这事很私密 你能不能过来一趟 |
| [12:36] | Your family’s not, you know, I’m not… | 我和你们家… |
| [12:39] | We’re not related anymore. | 我们已经没有任何关系了 |
| [12:40] | I’m your son’s aunt! | 我是你儿子的婶婶啊 |
| [12:42] | – Which makes us… – Sisters! | – 你又不是我什么人 – 我是你的大姐啊 |
| [12:44] | What is wrong with you? Currently, I mean, medically. | 你到底出什么问题了 医疗上的 |
| [12:47] | I really don’t want the federal government | 我不想让联邦政府听到 |
| [12:49] | listening in on this one. | 这种私密的事情 |
| [12:50] | Well, I’m just in the middle… | 我现在正忙着… |
| [12:51] | Can you please come down here? | 求求你快过来吧 |
| [12:53] | After church, can we go fishing? | 礼拜之后, 可以带我去钓鱼吗 |
| [12:56] | A day on the lake? I love lakes. | 去湖边玩吗 我喜欢 |
| [12:59] | That’s a great idea. | 好主意 |
| [13:01] | Bobby Ledbetter said he caught a 5-pounder the other day. | 鲍比·莱德贝特说他前几天逮到了一条五磅的大鱼 |
| [13:05] | But I don’t believe him. | 我才不信他的鬼话 |
| [13:07] | Well, it’s better to believe someone who’s lying | 宁可错信别人的谎言 |
| [13:09] | than to doubt someone who’s telling the truth. | 也好过质疑他人的真心 |
| [13:11] | Thanks, Dad. | 谢谢你 爸 |
| [13:13] | You know, you’re a good dad. | 你真是个好爸爸 |
| [13:18] | So then you take that big long one, | 再把长的一边塞进去 |
| [13:21] | and then you’re done. | 就系好了 |
| [13:24] | You think you can do that next time? | 你觉得下次能自己系好了吗 |
| [13:25] | I might have to ask you to show me again. | 可能还得叫你来教我 |
| [13:28] | Well, I’ll be here. | 那就再来找我吧 |
| [13:33] | Who the fuck are you? | 你他妈谁啊 |
| [13:38] | And two, and three… | 二 三 |
| [13:40] | It was the wedding of our dreams, wasn’t it, Leonard? | 我们的婚礼就像美梦成真一样 对不对 莱纳德 |
| [13:44] | Your vows brought me to my knees. | 我在你的宣誓中屈膝 |
| [13:46] | The scent of fresh lilies. | 百合花散发着清香 |
| [13:48] | The sunlight splashed across your face. | 阳光洒在你的脸上 |
| [13:51] | It was perfect, wasn’t it? | 简直完美 对吗 |
| [13:53] | I was so worried about the salmon, | 我当时一直在担心鲑鱼 |
| [13:55] | but it was everybody’s favorite. | 但它却成了大家的最爱 |
| [13:57] | Even Aunt Beth went back for seconds. | 甚至贝丝婶婶都喜欢 |
| [13:59] | And you know how she can be. | 毕竟她那么挑剔 |
| [14:01] | Who’s Beth? | 贝丝是谁 |
| [14:04] | Do you love me? | 你爱我吗 |
| [14:07] | I love you to the moon, Leonard. | 我爱你直到永远 莱纳德 |
| [14:10] | I love you to the moon… | 我爱你到永远 |
| [14:12] | wife. | 老婆 |
| [14:13] | Spin! | 转 |
| [14:17] | You’re so lucky to do this every day. | 你能每天做这些真是太幸运了 |
| [14:23] | now dip me like one of your French women. | 现在托住我的腰深深地把我放下 |
| [14:39] | Hi, Mom. | 嗨 妈 |
| [14:41] | You’re confused. I’m Louise. | 你认错人了 我是路易丝 |
| [14:46] | Hi, Louise. | 嗨 路易丝 |
| [14:48] | I’m your son. | 我是你的儿子 |
| [14:51] | No. | 不 |
| [14:53] | No. | 不是 |
| [14:55] | I don’t think so. | 你才不是 |
| [14:58] | So where ya headed, Louise? | 你要去哪儿 路易丝 |
| [15:01] | A place that makes me happy. | 去一个让我快乐的地方 |
| [15:04] | Niagara Falls? | 尼加拉大瀑布吗 |
| [15:08] | How did you know? | 你怎么知道的 |
| [15:09] | Just a guess. | 猜的 |
| [15:10] | My sister lives there. | 我妹妹住在那儿 |
| [15:19] | I wish I could go with you. | 我真想和你一起去 |
| [15:21] | No, I’m going alone. | 不行 我要自己去 |
| [15:25] | Cock fucker! | 妈个蛋的 |
| [15:26] | Son of a fuck! | 奶奶个腿的 |
| [15:28] | I can’t wait to get out | 我已经等不及 |
| [15:31] | – of this fucking family! – Please hurry. | – 远离你们家的这些破事了 – 麻烦快点 |
| [15:33] | Every time it sings, it goes up further. | 每次它一响 就钻的更深了 |
| [15:36] | You wouldn’t have had this problem with the alto. | 你要塞的是小一点的中音酸果 就不会这么麻烦了 |
| [15:38] | How was Hershey Park? | 你在好时公园玩的怎么样 |
| [15:40] | Scott and I went there once, but… | 我和斯科特去过一次 但是 |
| [15:43] | he thought the room was haunted. | 他觉得那里闹鬼 |
| [15:44] | Hershey Park is an adolescent nightmare. | 好时公园简直就是一个孩子气的噩梦 |
| [15:47] | It’s not even ironically enjoyable. | 没法让人感受到一丁点的欢乐 |
| [15:49] | Just because you appreciate chocolate | 虽然人们喜欢巧克力 |
| [15:50] | doesn’t mean you appreciate a chocolate roller coaster. | 但也不代表一定会喜欢巧克力过山车吧 |
| [15:52] | But filter “I love chocolate” through a man’s brain, | 但要让男人意识到即便喜欢巧克力也是有程度的 |
| [15:54] | and… whatever, doesn’t matter. | 真是太难了 算了无所谓了 |
| [15:56] | I don’t matter. Nothing matters | 我不在乎 什么都无所谓 |
| [15:59] | except for the plumbing of my ex-husband’s sister’s vagina. | 但我依然还是要探索前夫姐姐的阴道 |
| [16:02] | Did something happen? | 你出什么事了吗 |
| [16:03] | Jesus, did this thing take the subway? | 这东西是坐地铁钻进去的吗 |
| [16:05] | You’re not wearing your ring. | 你怎么没带戒指 |
| [16:07] | I really need to concentrate. | 我需要专注 |
| [16:09] | Will said Peter was proposing. | 威尔说皮特向你求婚了 |
| [16:11] | Oh, really? He said this | 是吗 他什么时候说的 |
| [16:13] | on the plane ride back from being kidnapped | 是在被绑架之后 |
| [16:14] | – to the Philippines? – No. | – 坐飞机从菲律宾返程的路上吗 – 不是 |
| [16:15] | On the chopper, leaving the fishing vessel. | 是在坐直升机离开渔船的时候 |
| [16:17] | I told Peter I needed time to think. | 我跟皮特说我需要一点时间考虑 |
| [16:20] | – You told him no? – I said I need time | – 你拒绝了吗 – 我说我需要时间 |
| [16:22] | because I need time. | 是因为我确实需要 |
| [16:24] | Because you still love Jeff. | 因为你还爱着杰夫 |
| [16:25] | I definitely have zero feelings for that man… | 我对那个男人绝对一点感觉都没有了 |
| [16:28] | – zero! – Are you two okay in there? | – 完全没有 – 两位还好吗 |
| [16:29] | – Yeah, we’re good. – We’re just fine. | – 是的 我们很好 – 我们很好 |
| [16:31] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [16:32] | Here, do this for me. | 来 帮我签一下 |
| [16:38] | Hey, that’s the woman, her. | 就是那个女人 |
| [16:41] | That’s Grandma. | 那是你的外祖母 |
| [16:44] | Are you sure that’s Grandma? | 你确定那是外祖母吗 |
| [16:46] | Ah, you never forget your first wife. | 没人能忘掉第一任妻子 |
| [16:49] | That’s not really Grandma. | 那肯定不是外祖母 |
| [16:51] | No, but she’s a dead ringer. | 我知道 但她长得太像了 |
| [16:55] | Go over and say something. | 那就过去说点什么吧 |
| [16:56] | – What about you? – Don’t worry about me. | – 你呢 – 不用管我 |
| [16:58] | – I wouldn’t know what to say. – Go, or I’ll kill myself. | – 我不知道说什么 – 快去 不然我就死给你看 |
| [17:11] | Excuse me. | 打扰一下 |
| [17:15] | – Yes? – I’m sorry, but… | – 什么事 – 打扰了 但是… |
| [17:17] | you look exactly like my ex-wife. | 你和我的前妻长得太像了 |
| [17:21] | That’s a terrible line. | 你的搭讪词太差劲了 |
| [17:22] | Oh, my name is Sebastiano. | 我是塞巴斯蒂亚诺 |
| [17:25] | Most everybody calls me Seb. | 大家都叫我塞巴 |
| [17:27] | And I wonder, um… | 我想问 |
| [17:31] | would you have a meal with me? | 你是否愿意和我共进一餐 |
| [17:33] | I’m busy at the moment, but you knew that already. | 正如你所见 我现在有点忙 |
| [17:36] | You should eat after you do these things | 做完这些你应该吃点东西 |
| [17:38] | or you’ll pass out. | 要不然你会晕过去 |
| [17:39] | I have plans. | 我已经有别的计划了 |
| [17:41] | I understand. | 我明白了 |
| [17:45] | Sebastiano. | 塞巴斯蒂亚诺 |
| [17:47] | Yes. | 请讲 |
| [17:48] | Give me a reason to cancel my plans. | 给我一个取消计划的理由 |
| [17:51] | I’ll give you one tonight. | 今晚睡前我可以给你一个 |
| [17:54] | And another tomorrow morning. | 明早起来再给你一个 |
| [18:08] | Your tux reminds me of a dream I had last night. | 你这身西装让我想起了昨晚的梦 |
| [18:11] | Oh, God. Ha. | 老天 |
| [18:12] | There’s nothing more annoying | 没什么比听别人说梦 |
| [18:14] | than hearing about someone’s dreams. | 更让人心烦的了 |
| [18:15] | That’s not true. | 这么说可不对 |
| [18:17] | Nobody hated Martin Luther King. | 没人讨厌马丁·路德·金的梦 |
| [18:19] | Well, somebody did. | 谁说没有 |
| [18:22] | You can’t make that joke. | 这种玩笑开不得 |
| [18:24] | Fuck you! | 滚你妈蛋 |
| [18:28] | Are you sure we’ve never met? | 你确定我们从没见过吗 |
| [18:32] | Excuse me for a moment. | 失陪一下 |
| [18:33] | Wait a minute… there’s something I wanna tell you. | 等等… 我想跟你说点事 |
| [18:36] | You should know that I had a small stroke today, | 我今天遭受了一次轻度中风 |
| [18:41] | but I’m fine. I’m completely fine. | 但我很好 感觉完全正常 |
| [18:45] | Glad to hear it. | 那真好 |
| [19:28] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [19:29] | Have you ever felt that | 你是否曾有过一种感觉 |
| [19:32] | life is sometimes suddenly… | 突然间觉得人生 |
| [19:36] | so magical? | 如此奇妙 |
| [19:38] | Yes. | 我有过 |
| [19:40] | But when you say it, it sounds stupid. | 但从你嘴里说出来 就觉得好傻 |
| [19:59] | What’s beating you up, little boy? | 受什么打击了 小男孩 |
| [20:01] | Guess I just don’t wanna be me. | 我可能只是不想成为我 |
| [20:06] | What’s the me you wanna be? | 你想成为什么样的人 |
| [20:09] | Someone whose wife isn’t remarrying | 一个老婆再婚时 |
| [20:11] | an anesthesiologist. | 不会嫁给麻醉师的人 |
| [20:14] | Someone whose… | 一个… |
| [20:16] | son… is still talking to him. | 儿子还理他的人 |
| [20:22] | Someone who can cope… ha… with his feelings. | 一个能处理好自己感情的人 |
| [20:28] | You can feel anything at all. | 你所感受到的一切 |
| [20:33] | Anything at all, you can feel it. | 都是因为你能够感受而存在 |
| [20:38] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [20:41] | That’s good advice. | 这个建议很不错 |
| [20:42] | It’s not advice. | 这不是建议 |
| [20:44] | I read that on the back of a prophylactic. | 是我在避孕药背面看到的 |
| [20:50] | There’s a way out, if you wanna hear it. | 如果你想听 倒是有个办法 |
| [20:54] | See, I’ve got a bastard of a husband | 你看 我有一个混球老公 |
| [20:57] | and two kids I can’t stand. | 和两个让我无法忍受的孩子 |
| [20:59] | – You love your kids. – They’re paperweights. | – 你很爱你的孩子啊 – 他们是我的重担 |
| [21:03] | Adorable, funny… | 可爱 有趣的… |
| [21:05] | paperweights. | 两个重担 |
| [21:07] | But the good news is you can always escape. | 但好消息是 你总是可以选择逃离的 |
| [21:11] | You can? | 你可以吗 |
| [21:12] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [21:14] | It’s easy. | 很容易的 |
| [21:15] | Failure doesn’t have to follow you. | 你并不是只能和注定的失败相随 |
| [21:19] | I’m escaping to Niagara Falls | 比如我 就要逃到尼加拉大瀑布去 |
| [21:21] | to where my sister lives. | 我姐姐住在那里 |
| [21:23] | You want out? | 你想逃离吗 |
| [21:26] | You just have to get on the bus. | 你只需要坐上公交车 |
| [21:30] | And the bus… always shows up. | 而带你逃离的车 总是会出现的 |
| [21:48] | I’m sorry. I have… to go home. | 不好意思 我得… 回家了 |
| [22:02] | As a monotheist, I always believed | 作为一神论者 我一直坚信 |
| [22:06] | there was one creator. | 造物主只有一位 |
| [22:08] | Until I met our next speaker. | 但下一位演讲者却改变了我的想法 |
| [22:11] | Please welcome the alchemist | 请欢迎 为《玩偶时间》节目 |
| [22:14] | who creates all those wonderful creatures | 创造出所有精美玩偶的魔法师 |
| [22:16] | on Puppet Time, Deirdre Piccirillo. | 迪尔德丽·皮奇里洛 |
| [22:23] | Deirdre? | 迪尔德丽 |
| [22:25] | Is she here? | 她在场吗 |
| [22:26] | Go to the E.R. | 赶紧去急诊室 |
| [22:27] | You know whose fault this is? | 你知道这是谁的错吗 |
| [22:29] | Duterte. | 杜特尔特 |
| [22:30] | He turned the Philippines into a police state. | 他把菲律宾搞成了警察国家 |
| [22:32] | He has oppressed his people for too long. | 他压迫这个国家太久了 |
| [22:35] | You can’t just heave a man off a building | 你不能因为一个人歌唱离婚 |
| [22:38] | for singing about divorce! | 就把他从楼上扔下去 |
| [22:40] | The problem is men. | 问题出在男人身上 |
| [22:43] | That’s the common thread here. | 他们才是所有问题的共同症结 |
| [22:45] | Scott… a man… steals my furniture, my puppets, | 斯科特 男的 偷了我的家具 抢了我的玩偶 |
| [22:49] | ends my marriage? | 毁了我的婚姻 |
| [22:51] | – Sure. – Thank you! | – 是是是 – 谢谢你的声援 |
| [22:53] | And Dad… it’s like, why are you trusting me? | 还有我爸 他干嘛要相信我 |
| [22:56] | Me? You can’t trust me! | 你不能信任我 |
| [22:58] | For the past 30 years, | 过去的三十年 |
| [23:00] | all I’m doing is making puppets. | 我唯一干的事就是做玩偶 |
| [23:02] | And now I’m in charge. That’s great planning, Dad. | 现在全都要我负责了 规划得真好 爸 |
| [23:05] | That’s on you, Pop. | 全都怪你 老爹 |
| [23:07] | Anyone else on your list? | 你还有谁要说 |
| [23:08] | Yeah! Who doesn’t show up | 有 是谁连自己的终身成就奖 |
| [23:11] | for their own lifetime achievement award? | 都不敢露面来领 |
| [23:14] | Selfish people. | 自私佬 |
| [23:15] | When I get an award | 要是给我颁一个 |
| [23:16] | for giving away all the money I embezzled, | 放弃全额盗用公款奖 |
| [23:18] | I show the fuck up. | 我他妈肯定露面 |
| [23:20] | Uh-uh, no. | 打住 |
| [23:21] | What? | 你说什么 |
| [23:22] | You’re a mess. You’ve always been a mess. | 你活得一团糟 你一直活得一团糟 |
| [23:25] | All that is happening to you is your fault | 你身上发生的破事 全都怪你自己 |
| [23:27] | and no one else’s. | 和别人没有任何关系 |
| [23:28] | In no uncertain terms, | 我明确地告诉你 |
| [23:30] | you are the architect of your own catastrophe | 你的灾难人生全是你亲手构建的 |
| [23:34] | except maybe the Duterte thing, | 也许杜特尔特那件事不怪你吧 |
| [23:36] | but he’s a dictator. | 毕竟他是个独裁者 |
| [23:37] | You chose who to marry. You chose your job. | 你选择了嫁给谁 你选择了你的工作 |
| [23:40] | You chose to put Jeff on the air with very few guardrails. | 你选择了让杰夫没遮没拦地在电视上随性说 |
| [23:42] | You chose to manufacture a doll | 你选择了制作 |
| [23:44] | that listens to children sleeping, | 能听到孩子一切的玩偶 |
| [23:46] | and you chose to stick a very expensive vibrating pickle | 你选择了把一个巨贵的酸果振动棒 |
| [23:50] | into your vagina! | 插入自己的阴道 |
| [23:53] | I’m sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
| [23:54] | You twisted its head, you made it burrow, | 但是你打开的振动棒 是你一直把它往里塞 |
| [23:56] | you made it sing… you! Your fault, you! | 是你让它唱的歌 都你的错 全都怪你 |
| [23:59] | You are Duterte! | 你就是灾难独裁者 |
| [24:02] | I’ve been fucking myself this whole time! | 原来一直都是我自作自受 |
| [24:42] | I can’t keep chasing her, can I? | 我不能一直念着她 是不是 |
| [24:45] | No, man. Can’t. | 是啊 不能 |
| [24:49] | Sooner or later, you gotta accept reality. | 既然早晚都要接受现实 |
| [24:54] | Sooner is better. | 不如趁早吧 |
| [25:14] | Good evening. | 晚上好 |
| [25:16] | I’m Jeff Pickles. | 我是杰夫·皮克斯 |
| [25:22] | You know, my whole life… | 在我整个人生中… |
| [25:26] | I felt I had to choose between my job and my family. | 我都感觉必须要在工作与家庭之间做出选择 |
| [25:31] | And it took me till today | 直到今天 我才意识到 |
| [25:34] | to realize how easy that choice is. | 这个选择有多么容易 |
| [25:40] | Because one of them is real | 因为一个是真实的 |
| [25:43] | and one is a fantasy. | 另一个只是幻想 |