| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Finally, Mama’s going to have some pictures of her | 终于 妈妈能有些她小宝贝儿美美的照片 |
| [00:05] | beautiful baby to show all her friends at work. | 给同事们看咯 |
| [00:38] | Seriously, if you want me to stay a few more hours and baby-sit | 说真的 如果你还想我在这里多呆几个小时照顾孩子 |
| [00:41] | I-I won’t mind. | 我是完全可以的 |
| [00:42] | Lois looks exhausted. | Lois看上去精疲力竭的 |
| [00:44] | No-no-no-no-no, we’re fine. We’ll see you Monday. | 真心不用了 我们可以搞的定 我们周一再见了 |
| [00:46] | Wait, isn’t today Monday? | 等等 难道今天不是礼拜一么 |
| [00:49] | It’s Friday. | 是礼拜五 |
| [00:50] | Oh my god, I’m supposed to be in court today. | 我的天呀 我今天应该要去上庭的 |
| [00:52] | I’m filing a restraining order against my sister. | 我正在申请对我姐姐的禁令 |
| [00:55] | She thinks that just because | 她以为仅仅因为 |
| [00:57] | she’s been my boyfriend’s first and third wife, | 她当过我男友的第一任和第三任妻子 |
| [01:00] | she has some kind of a claim on him. | 她就享有他的所有权了 |
| [01:03] | Isn’t that… the Cat Lady? | 她不就那个 猫女郎么 |
| [01:07] | I guess. For a while she was the Naked Jogger. | 我猜是的 有那么一阵她还是个裸奔爱好者来着 |
| [01:10] | But mostly she just four bucks an hour. | 但大部分时候她都是4块钱一小时的保姆 |
| [01:12] | Ok boys, in the kitchen. You’re making dinner tonight. | 好了 小伙子们 到厨房去 今晚你们做晚饭 |
| [01:14] | Why do we have to? | 为什么得是我们做 |
| [01:15] | Because your mother hasn’t had any sleep for the last four days. | 那是因为你们的老妈最近四天都没睡觉了 |
| [01:18] | Now get in there! | 赶紧给我进去 |
| [01:22] | And keep it down, she’s nursing the baby. | 小声一点 妈妈正在给宝宝喂奶 |
| [01:29] | I don’t want to go to sleep. | 我不想去睡觉 |
| [01:31] | Come on, come on. | 来吧 来吧 |
| [01:31] | I am telling you, I am not tired. | 我告诉你 我一点都不累 |
| [01:34] | Hal please, just stop treating me like a child. | Hal 拜托了 别把我当成孩子一样对待 |
| [01:37] | Honey, you need your rest. | 亲爱的 你需要好好休息 |
| [01:39] | The boys and I are going to take care of this baby | 今晚孩子们和我来照顾宝宝 |
| [01:40] | for the rest of the night so you can sleep. | 所以今晚你就好好睡一觉吧 |
| [01:43] | So stop arguing with me. | 别再跟我争辩了 |
| [02:00] | Try to get Jamie to eat while I make a run for more diapers. | 在我去给Jamie买尿布的时候你们负责给他喂奶 |
| [02:03] | If that nipple gets clogged, we’ve got some clean ones in the drawer. | 如果那个奶嘴头坏了的话 我们还有干净的在抽屉里 |
| [02:06] | I’ll only be gone ten minutes, | 我就去十分钟 |
| [02:07] | and I don’t want anything to go wrong during that time. | 我希望在此期间一切正常 |
| [02:10] | I am trusting you boys are mature enough to handle this. | 我希望你们足够成熟能搞定这一切 |
| [02:16] | He said nipple. | 他居然说了奶嘴头 |
| [02:22] | When will J-Lo learn? | 什么时候J-Lo才能吸取教训 |
| [02:24] | Take it from a bad boy, we’re nothing but trouble. | 找了个坏小子当男友 只能是自找麻烦 |
| [02:29] | Oh, you’re buying the Tidy Winks. | 哦 你要买完美瞬间牌的尿不湿 |
| [02:30] | Yeah, and I’m in kind of a hurry. | 没错 而且我正在赶时间 |
| [02:32] | I don’t want to criticise, | 我并不是想批评你的选择 |
| [02:33] | but I think I know why you’re buying the Tidy Winks. | 但是 我能理解你为什么想买这一款尿不湿 |
| [02:36] | It’s the absorbency, right? People always fall for that, | 是因为它超强的瞬吸作用 对吧 人们常常倾心于这一点 |
| [02:39] | but what they forget is the elasticity in the legs is suspected best. | 但是人们都忘了它影响了孩子大腿自由活动的灵活性 |
| [02:42] | Craig, I just- | Craig 我不过是 |
| [02:43] | You know, since I’m kind of | 你懂的 我某种程度上也算 |
| [02:44] | little Jamie’s unofficial, second, alternate godfather, | 小Jamie非正式的教父备胎 |
| [02:47] | I’ve been doing some research, | 我自己也做了些研究 |
| [02:48] | and I recommend you take a look at the Baby Naps. | 我推荐你使用安睡宝宝这个牌子的 |
| [02:51] | They’ve got this fabric | 它用的这种材料 |
| [02:53] | that not only has remarkable weaking capability, but actually- | 不仅非常柔软舒适 而且 |
| [02:56] | Craig! For god’s sakes, I’m in a hurry! | Craig 看在上帝的份上 我真的赶时间 |
| [02:58] | Now, I just want the Tidy Winks, okay? | 所以 我就想要完美瞬间好么 |
| [03:01] | I don’t have time for a big discussion. | 我没有时间听你在这长篇大论 |
| [03:02] | Now please, would you just ring me up? | 所以 麻烦你利索给我算下钱好么 |
| [03:04] | Certainly. | 当然 |
| [03:07] | That’ll be $7.98. | 总共7.98美元 |
| [03:19] | Craig, don’t make a thing out of this. | Craig 刚才那番话请你别放在心上 |
| [03:20] | Why, whatever do you mean, Hal? | 何出此言 Hal |
| [03:22] | I’m sorry that I snapped at you before, | 刚刚冲你发火了 我很抱歉 |
| [03:25] | but I really need these diapers. | 但是我真的很需要这些尿不湿 |
| [03:27] | Can you loan me the money? | 你能让先借我点钱么 |
| [03:32] | I could loan you the money,Hal. | 我可以借你钱 Hal |
| [03:34] | But that would be helping you. | 但那就是帮你忙 |
| [03:35] | And since you have a tendency to yell at | 但是既然你喜欢冲着 |
| [03:37] | people who try to help you, | 想要帮你忙的人发火 |
| [03:38] | I don’t think that’s the wisest course of action for me to take. | 我不认为帮你忙是个明智的选择 |
| [03:41] | Look, Lois will pay for these tomorrow when she comes in. | Lois明天上班的时候就会付钱 |
| [03:44] | You can’t take those, they’re shoplifting! | 你不能拿走那些 你这是偷窃行为 |
| [03:45] | Fine. Then I’m shoplifting. | 好吧 我就偷窃了怎么着 |
| [03:47] | What are you going to do about it? | 你能拿我怎么样 |
| [03:48] | Vernon Vernon! | |
| [04:17] | Where’s Dad with the diapers? | 老爸怎么还没把尿布买回来 |
| [04:19] | Dewey, triple-bag that diaper, | Dewey 给那个尿布套三层垃圾袋 |
| [04:20] | and make sure the garbage can lid is on tight. | 确保垃圾桶的盖子盖紧了 |
| [04:22] | And hold your breath, | 给我好好地屏住呼吸 |
| [04:23] | because if you pass out, we’re not coming out there to get you. | 因为如果你昏过去了 我们可不会出去救你 |
| [04:27] | Oven mitt. | 烤箱手套 |
| [04:30] | What a fun… Saturday night. | 这可真是美好的 周六晚啊 |
| [04:33] | Nobody’s enjoying this, Stevie. | 没有人喜欢干这个好么 Stevie |
| [04:35] | You don’t have to be sarcastic. | 你没必要冷嘲热讽的 |
| [04:37] | I wasn’t. | 我可没有 |
| [04:41] | Malcolm right? | 你是Malcom么 |
| [04:44] | Yeah. | 是的 |
| [04:45] | See, I told you I knew his name. | 看 就跟你说我知道他叫什么 |
| [04:47] | So, we have a proposal for you and your idiot brother. | 对于你跟你那愚蠢的弟弟我们有一个提议 |
| [04:51] | Oh, my god. Another one? | 天啊 这还有一个 |
| [04:53] | And he’s in a wheelchair. | 他甚至还坐在轮椅上 |
| [04:56] | Jackpot! | 太棒了 |
| [04:58] | Kathy Kathy? | |
| [04:59] | Do you guys want to go out on a date with us? | 你们几个想和我们出去约会么 |
| [05:05] | You pray… and you pray… and finally… it happens. | 祈祷 再祈祷 这一天 终于来到 |
| [05:20] | What do you mean “go out”? When? Where? | 你说的约会什么意思 什么时候 到哪去 |
| [05:23] | Right now. With us. In that. | 就现在 和我们一起 坐着那个玩意去 |
| [05:29] | Oh, my God, I’ll bet it has a toilet. Dibs! | 天哪 我敢跟你打赌这车里面肯定带有卫生间 是我的了 |
| [05:32] | No, wait, Reese. | 等等 不行 Reese |
| [05:33] | We’re supposed to be taking care of our little brother. | 我们应该要照顾我们的小弟弟 |
| [05:35] | We can’t just go ride around | 我们不能就这么出去 |
| [05:36] | in the coolest car we’ve ever seen, | 坐上我们见过的最酷的车 |
| [05:38] | with three incredibly hot girls. | 带着三个超级漂亮的美女 |
| [05:42] | Guys, guys! I put the lid on tight, | 兄弟们 兄弟们 我已经把盖子盖紧了 |
| [05:44] | but I think it’s eating through the…can. | 但我觉得这玩意已经开始腐蚀 垃圾桶了 |
| [05:51] | Ok, now look ashamed. | 好的 现在面露愧色来一张 |
| [05:56] | Ok, can I at least have a phone call | 好吧 那我至少能打个电话给我的家里人 |
| [05:58] | to let my family know where I am? | 告诉他们我在哪么 |
| [06:00] | Well, technically you’re not under arrest, | 好吧 理论上你不是被拘捕 |
| [06:02] | so no. | 所以 答案是不行 |
| [06:03] | But, since we’re friends, | 但是 既然我们是朋友 |
| [06:05] | I’m going to allow you to work off your $7.98. | 我可以让你打工偿还那7.98美元 |
| [06:10] | Two hours of minimum wage ought to do it. | 按照最低时薪你工作两个小时就行了 |
| [06:20] | Stop fussing, I know you’re not hungry. | 别再闹了 我知道你不是饿了 |
| [06:24] | Oh, I know, You want your pacifier. | 我知道了 你想要你的那个奶嘴 |
| [06:27] | Oh, where is it? What do I do? | 弄哪去了 我该怎么办 |
| [06:30] | Oh, how about a story? | 我给你讲个故事怎么样 |
| [06:32] | Stories are good. | 故事很不错啊 |
| [06:34] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [06:34] | Once upon a time, | 很久很久以前 |
| [06:35] | there was a little baby named Jamie, | 有一个小婴儿名叫Jamie |
| [06:38] | who had a big brother named Dewey. | 他有个哥哥叫Dewey |
| [06:40] | Jamie worshipped Dewey. | Jamie很崇拜Dewey |
| [06:42] | Dewey and Jamie always had a good time together, | Dewey和Jamie在一起总是那么快乐 |
| [06:45] | even though their hateful older brothers | 尽管他们有两个可恶的哥哥 |
| [06:47] | always tried to make their lives miserable. | 总是想方设法折磨他们 |
| [06:50] | Hey Reese, do you want to have some fun? | Reese 你想找点乐子么 |
| [06:52] | Yeah, fun is good. | 当然 能有乐子最好了 |
| [06:56] | Stop! Put him down! Stop it! | 快住手 把他放下来 快住手 |
| [06:59] | Shut up, Dewey. We’re better than you are. | 给我闭嘴Dewey 我们可比你强多了 |
| [07:04] | What do you two boys think you’re doing? | 你们两个小兔崽子在干什么 |
| [07:06] | We’re sorry, Mom. | 对不起 妈妈 |
| [07:07] | I’m stupid. | 我是个笨蛋 |
| [07:08] | And the two stupid older brothers paid the price for their folly. | 然后两个蠢哥哥为做出这种蠢事付出了代价 |
| [07:13] | I warned you two about messing with my favourite children. | 我早就警告过你们不准欺负我最偏爱的两个孩子 |
| [07:15] | Maybe this time you’ll learn to behave. | 也许这次你们能学乖 |
| [07:19] | Well, now you don’t have to worry about those two any more. | 好了 你们不用再担心他们两个了 |
| [07:22] | And Dewey, just remember, | 对了Dewey 给我记住 |
| [07:26] | don’t go near my closet. | 不准靠近我的衣柜 |
| [07:32] | Closet. Not bad. | 衣柜 感觉不错 |
| [07:38] | Ok, so here’s the deal, freaks. | 你们这帮屌丝们 是这么一回事 |
| [07:40] | Our boyfriends left us in the middle of the Fall Formal | 我们的男友为了去某个愚蠢的派对 |
| [07:43] | to go to some stupid party. | 在秋季正装舞会上把我们给丢下了 |
| [07:44] | Us. | 我们哎 |
| [07:45] | How can Kevin do this to me? | Kevin怎么能这么对我 |
| [07:47] | I call him twelve times a day, | 我一天给他打12个电话 |
| [07:49] | I show up at all his practices. | 他所有的训练我都到场观看 |
| [07:51] | I even changed my whole schedule | 为了能保证我们能上一样的课 |
| [07:52] | so that we could have all the same classes. | 我把我的课程表全给改了 |
| [07:55] | Well, now we are going to pay them back. Big time. | 所以 我们这次要狠狠地给他们好看 |
| [07:58] | Wait a minute. There was a Fall Formal? | 慢着 有秋季正装晚会 |
| [08:01] | Why wouldn’t we know about that? | 为什么我们居然不知道 |
| [08:04] | Oh. | 懂了 |
| [08:05] | So now, we’re going to go to this party, | 所以 我们现在要去那个派对 |
| [08:06] | and make out with you guys in front | 在那些不懂怜香惜玉的混蛋们面前 |
| [08:07] | of those inconsiderate jerks. | 跟你们好好亲热一番 |
| [08:09] | You want to make them jealous? | 你让他们嫉妒 |
| [08:10] | No, we want to make them puke. | 不是 我们想让他们恶心呕吐 |
| [08:12] | See, once they see us kissing losers like you guys, | 你看 一旦他们看到我们跟你们这帮屌丝们接吻 |
| [08:14] | they’re never going to live it down. | 他们肯定没法接受终身难忘 |
| [08:16] | You came over to our house and asked us out | 你们特地来我们家邀请我们出去约会 |
| [08:17] | because we were the most disgusting guys you could find? | 就因为我们是你们能找到的最屌丝的男生 |
| [08:20] | Actually, some kid with a hunchback and gills turned ’em down. | 事实上 一些驼背大腮的孩子拒绝了她们 |
| [08:24] | Said he had too much pride. | 说他们太有自尊 |
| [08:26] | Forget it. We’re not going to be paraded around | 别想了 我们不会像被链子拴着的猴子一样 |
| [08:28] | like monkeys on a chain. | 四处乱蹦让你们带去消遣 |
| [08:29] | You know, we’ve already been disappointed once tonight. | 你知道么 我们今晚已经失望过一次了 |
| [08:32] | Can you stop thinking about yourself for one second?! | 你们就不能别这么自私只为自己着想么 |
| [08:35] | I can’t believe this. | 难以置信 |
| [08:37] | I think… the middle one… likes you. | 我觉得 中间那个 喜欢你 |
| [08:54] | Dewey and Jamie had to know | Dewey和Jamie必须知道 |
| [08:56] | what was inside the secret closet, | 那个神秘的衣柜里到底藏了什么 |
| [08:58] | but Mom kept the key hidden under her pillow. | 但是妈妈把钥匙藏在了她的枕头底下 |
| [09:00] | So they came up with a brilliant plan. | 所以 他们想出了一个绝妙的主意 |
| [09:03] | *Tell me, when will you be mine?* | *告诉我 何时你为我所拥有* |
| [09:07] | *Tell me, Quando, Quando, Quando.* | *告诉我 到底何时 何时 何时* |
| [09:11] | *When will you say yes to me?* | *何时你才会答应我* |
| [09:16] | *Tell me,* | *告诉我* |
| [09:16] | *Quando, Quando, Quando.* | *何时 何时 何时* |
| [09:37] | Psst! What are in you in for? | 喂 你犯了啥事 |
| [09:40] | Diapers. | 尿布 |
| [09:42] | Another victim caught up in the evil net of Craig Feldspar. | 又一个Craig Feldspar魔爪下的受害者 |
| [09:46] | He’s a monster. | 他就是个恶魔 |
| [09:48] | He treats us all on the nightshift like dirt. | 他对待我们这些上夜班的态度极差 |
| [09:51] | The absolute power of Assistant Night Manager has corrupted him. | 魔鬼夜班经理的邪恶力量侵蚀了他 |
| [09:55] | We’re nothing better than slaves. | 他对我们还不如奴隶 |
| [09:58] | But you’re the employees, | 但你们是他的雇员 |
| [09:59] | you’re the people who actually run this store. | 实际上是你们保证了商店的运营 |
| [10:00] | He doesn’t care. | 他不在乎 |
| [10:02] | Do you know what he insists on using in the coffee machine? | 你知道他坚持要在咖啡机里放什么么 |
| [10:05] | Store brand. It is so bitter. It’s like drinking death. | 商店品牌的咖啡豆 尝起来极苦无比 喝起来就像到地狱走了一遭 |
| [10:10] | He won’t change the incline of the wheelchair ramp out front. | 他不原意调整前门的轮椅坡道的倾斜度 |
| [10:13] | I stall out every damn day | 我每天都特么卡在那里半天 |
| [10:15] | until someone gives me a push. | 除非有人能推我一把才行 |
| [10:16] | He has an iron grip on the store radio. | 他对商店的广播里放的歌铁拳控制 |
| [10:19] | He forces us to listen only to Show Tunes, | 尽管我们不记名投票给了成人时代 |
| [10:21] | even though we voted unanimously for Adult Contemporary. | 他还是强迫我们听百老汇金曲 |
| [10:24] | What does he have against Phil Collins?! | 他对Phil Collins有什么意见么 |
| [10:27] | That bastard! | 那个混蛋 |
| [10:28] | You can’t let him do this to you. | 你们不能让他为所欲为 |
| [10:30] | Without you, he’s nothing. | 没有了你们 他啥都不是 |
| [10:33] | He must be stopped. | 必须有人阻止他 |
| [10:35] | Vernon. | Vernon来了 |
| [10:43] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [10:44] | Maybe Craig’s not so bad. | 也许Craig 并没有这么坏 |
| [10:46] | He did give me the | 在我清理干净了他的 |
| [10:47] | Employee of the Month award after I cleaned his aquarium. | 金鱼缸之后 他确实给了我”本月最佳员工奖” |
| [10:50] | Employee of the Month awards are the opiate of the masses. | 他企图用本月最佳员工奖收买麻醉你们 |
| [10:55] | You people can’t let fear run your lives. | 你们不能活在恐惧中 |
| [10:57] | Are you going to act, | 你们是要奋起反抗 |
| [10:59] | or suffer under Craig forever? | 还是永远屈服于Craig的淫威之下 |
| [11:02] | Attention all Lucky Aide employees. | 所有幸福好帮手的员工注意了 |
| [11:04] | I need someone to microwave a three-cheese hot pocket a.s.a.p.. | 我需要有人尽快来帮我微波加热一下热封的三层起司 |
| [11:09] | The madness ends now. | 这种统治必须终结 |
| [11:13] | I told you, they wouldn’t stay at Lori’s party all night. | 我告诉过你们 他们不会在Lori的派对呆上一整晚的 |
| [11:16] | Well then, we’ll go to Charlotte’s party. | 好吧 我们现在去Charlotte的派对 |
| [11:17] | And if they’re not there, | 如果他们还不在那 |
| [11:18] | then we’ll go to Lisa’s party. | 之后我们就去Lisa家的派对 |
| [11:19] | And then we’ll try the party out on the pier. | 如果还不在我们就到码头上的派对去找 |
| [11:21] | What parties? Who are these people? | 什么派对 你们说的那些人到底是谁 |
| [11:23] | Do we even go to the same school? | 我们到底上的是不是同一所学校 |
| [11:24] | Stop rocking… my boat. | 别再搅了 我的好事了 |
| [11:27] | Let’s just walk home, | 我们现在最好赶紧回家 |
| [11:28] | take our horrible punishment from Dad, | 接受来自老爸的恐怖责罚 |
| [11:29] | and be done with it. | 然后了结这一切 |
| [11:30] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么胡话呢 |
| [11:32] | These girls want to fool around with us. | 这些妹子想和我们胡来哎 |
| [11:34] | Only because we’re losers. | 仅仅是因为我们是屌丝 |
| [11:35] | Hey, we’re riding in a limo we didn’t pay for. | 拜托 我们现在免费坐着豪车 |
| [11:38] | We’re about to make out with hot girls | 还可以和这些压根不喜欢我们的 |
| [11:40] | who don’t even like us. | 辣妹亲热一番 |
| [11:41] | I don’t know what we are, but we are not losers. | 我不知道我们到底算什么 但我们绝不是屌丝 |
| [11:43] | Have you even thought about where this is going? | 你有考虑过会有什么后果么 |
| [11:45] | Her boyfriend is Erin Stepanavich. | 她的男朋友可是Erin Stepanavich |
| [11:47] | Have you seen that guy? | 你记得那家伙是啥样的吗 |
| [11:48] | If he sees you kissing his girlfriend, | 如果他看到你在亲他的女朋友 |
| [11:50] | he’s gonna kill you. | 他绝对会杀了你的 |
| [11:51] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [11:52] | Then why are you- | 那你为什么还 |
| [11:53] | Because anything’s better than the way things are now. | 因为不管发生什么都不会比现在更苦逼了 |
| [11:55] | Look, I’ve had this cute lab partner in Science for eight weeks now. | 我和一个漂亮的妹子一起当了八周的实验伙伴 |
| [11:59] | Her name is Cheryl. | 她的名字叫Cheryl |
| [12:01] | I finally left Cheryl a note on her desk asking her out. | 我终于鼓起勇气留了张便条约Cheryl出去 |
| [12:04] | And when she read it, | 她看完便条之后 |
| [12:05] | she turned to me and said, | 转过头对我说 |
| [12:07] | “do you know who Reese is?” | 你知道Reese是谁么 |
| [12:10] | So then she goes, “Does anybody know who Reese is?” | 之后她又对着全班说 有人知道Reese是谁么 |
| [12:13] | And everybody shrugged. | 每个人都耸肩表示不知道 |
| [12:16] | So then I said, “probably some nobody.” | 之后我就说了 也许是哪个无名小卒吧 |
| [12:20] | And you know what? I was right. | 你知道么 我说对了 |
| [12:25] | Wow, that’s awful, kid. | 你这太悲剧了 孩子 |
| [12:28] | You want to wear my hat? | 你想戴我的帽子么 |
| [12:30] | So tonight, I’m going to fix that. | 所以今晚 我要改变这一切 |
| [12:32] | From now on, when I walk by, people are gonna say, | 从现在开始 当我经过人群 人们会问 |
| [12:36] | “What happened to that guy’s face?” | 他的脸怎么了 |
| [12:38] | Someone’s going to say, | 有人会说 |
| [12:40] | “That’s Reese. He made out with Erin Stepanavich’s girlfriend.” | 他是Reese 他跟Erin Stepanavich的女朋友亲热了 |
| [12:44] | And that, I can live with. | 这样 我就可以接受 |
| [12:48] | Ok, so which one do you want to kiss? | 好了 你们想亲哪一个 |
| [12:49] | Why don’t you just ask me which kind of roach I’d rather eat? | 那你为什么不干脆问我想吃哪种蟑螂好了 |
| [12:51] | You are such a wuss. You watch, I’ll do it. | 你真没用 看着 我来上 |
| [13:01] | I can’t do this without a drink. | 没喝醉我做不下去 |
| [13:03] | You guys can get liquor? | 你们可以弄到酒么 |
| [13:04] | We know a store where this idiot works. | 我们知道一家商店老板是个蠢蛋 |
| [13:06] | Welcome to our country, Mrs Nam-Hong. | 欢迎来到美国Nam-Hong小姐 |
| [13:09] | I hope you’re enjoying your stay here. | 我希望你们此行愉快 |
| [13:11] | You know, I’m thinking about retiring to Cambodia. | 你知道么 我也考虑过退休之后要住在柬埔寨 |
| [13:14] | I hear you can get a hut on the beach, | 我听说那里在沙滩上弄个木屋 娶个老婆 还有仆人 |
| [13:15] | with a wife and servants for $100 a month. | 一个月只要花100美元就可以 |
| [13:18] | The only problem is, | 但唯一的问题就是 |
| [13:18] | I need these special orthotics | 我需要用的那种特殊的矫正器 |
| [13:20] | which are very difficult to find in the tropics. | 是很难在热带地区找到的 |
| [13:23] | Like editions called Pro-Nation, | Pro-Nation上说 |
| [13:24] | which isn’t so bad by itself, | 这本身并不是很严重的病 |
| [13:25] | but combined with Hammer Toes- | 只是如果还有锤状趾 |
| [13:35] | Ok, now where was I? | 好的 我刚说到哪了 |
| [13:38] | Oh yeah. So, Dewey and Jamie waited | 对了 Dewey和Jamie等待着 |
| [13:40] | until it was late at night, | 直到半夜时分 |
| [13:47] | and then made their move. | 他们开始行动了 |
| [14:00] | Don’t worry Jamie, not all trapdoors lead to dungeons. | 别担心 Jamie 并不是所有的暗门都通往地牢 |
| [14:33] | And that’s when they realised, | 这个时候他们明白了 |
| [14:35] | Mom and Dad had created a secret good house, | 爸爸和妈妈私下里建了一个秘密的豪华房子 |
| [14:39] | which they went to every night while the kids were asleep. | 每晚在孩子们睡着之后他们都会去那里 |
| [14:41] | Which is why they were so obsessed with our bedtimes. | 这就是为什么他们那么在乎我们的睡觉时间 |
| [14:44] | When we never have anything nice, | 我们从没有过什么好东西 |
| [14:46] | and they always come out of their bedroom smiling. | 他们却总是笑着从卧室里出来 |
| [14:54] | This ninety-inch screen is much better than the seventy-five inch | 这个90英寸的电视要比浴室里的75英寸的电视 |
| [14:58] | we have in the bathroom. | 好太多了 |
| [14:58] | Oh, absolutely. | 那当然了 |
| [15:00] | By the way, Dewey asked for ice cream again today. | 对了 今天Dewey又要我给他买冰淇淋了 |
| [15:04] | I told him we couldn’t afford it. | 我告诉他我们没钱买 |
| [15:07] | Oh, I wonder what he’d do if he saw our ice cream helicopter. | 不知道他看到我们的冰淇淋直升机会怎样 |
| [15:12] | This could use some freshening up. | 给我再来一杯 |
| [15:14] | Did you charge the Brother-Bot? | 你给机器人管家充电了么 |
| [15:16] | I believe it’s good to go. | 应该已经充好了 |
| [15:19] | Drinks, Francis! | Francis 饮料 |
| [15:23] | You-are-the-worst-parents-in-the-world. | 你们是世界上最糟糕的父母 |
| [15:26] | You-undermine-my-confidence-at-every-turn. | 你们总是破坏我的自信 |
| [15:29] | You-are-the-worst-parents-in-the-world. | 你们是世界上最糟糕的父母 |
| [15:31] | And yet, as unbelievable as all of this was, | 尽管 这些事都很不可思议 |
| [15:34] | it still didn’t prepare them for the biggest surprise of all. | 但最令人震惊的事还在后面 |
| [15:38] | The most incredible thing they’d ever seen: | 他们看到了令人叹为观止的景象 |
| [15:45] | a pair of pants, his size, | 一条裤子 他的尺码 |
| [15:47] | that had never been worn or handed down from an older brother. | 没有被磨破或者是从他的大哥们那里传下来的新裤子 |
| [15:51] | With no holes, no stains, no funny smell, | 没有破洞 没有污渍 没有奇怪的气味 |
| [15:55] | no dead stuff in the pockets. | 在裤子口袋里也没有死掉的生物 |
| [15:57] | He had to wear those pants. | 他必须穿上这条裤子 |
| [16:06] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [16:10] | It’s not so much a paste, as a crust. | 它的外壳并不是那么粘稠 |
| [16:13] | I had to have it scraped off by- | 我必须把它刮下来 |
| [16:14] | Can we just get our | 你能帮我们结一下 |
| [16:24] | Vernon Vernon! | |
| [16:27] | Vernon Vernon! | |
| [16:44] | Vernon, the hamsters have left the wheel! | Vernon 仓鼠们离开滚轮了 |
| [16:47] | This is not a drill. | 这不是演习 |
| [16:48] | The hamsters have left the wheel! | 仓鼠们离开滚轮了 |
| [17:46] | Congratulations, guys. | 恭喜啊 伙计们 |
| [17:47] | Now, when he signs that confession, | 现在 等他签了那份认罪书 |
| [17:49] | give him his clothes back. | 再把衣服还给他 |
| [17:51] | What are we going to do? | 我们该怎么办 |
| [17:52] | I don’t know where else to get beer. | 我不知道还有什么其他地方可以买到啤酒 |
| [17:54] | Can we go home now? | 我们能回家了么 |
| [17:54] | Shut up. | 闭嘴 |
| [17:56] | Oh my god! Joe and Erin’s here! | 天哪 是Joe和Erin |
| [18:04] | Hey, Erin? You think you’re so special? | Erin 你以为你自己很特别么 |
| [18:06] | Well, watch this. I’ll kiss anything! | 看着 我可以和任何人接吻 |
| [18:08] | You don’t have to do this, Reese. | 你不需要做到这个份上 Reese |
| [18:10] | Hey, she’s the one who’s disgusted by this, not me. | 被恶心的是她 又不是我 |
| [18:23] | Oh my god! Jamie’s noo-noo! | 我的天哪 Jamie的奶嘴 |
| [18:25] | What? | 什么 |
| [18:25] | Jamie’s noo-noo. | Jamie的奶嘴 |
| [18:26] | He can’t sleep without his noo-noo. | 没有奶嘴他就睡不着 |
| [18:28] | We’ve got to get this home. | 我们得赶紧回家 |
| [18:30] | Hey! | 喂 |
| [18:32] | I’ll do anything you want, | 我可以给你任何想要的东西 |
| [18:33] | just take us home, now. | 只要你立刻带我们回家 |
| [18:34] | You know, kid. Just don’t ask. You’ve got heart. | 你知道么 孩子 不用多说 你是个有良心的好孩子 |
| [18:43] | Are they…meeting us…later? | 她们之后 还会和我们 汇合么 |
| [18:47] | So, the alarm’s going off, | 于是 警报被触发了 |
| [18:49] | and Dewey and Jamie are trapped. | Dewey 和Jamie被困在了那里 |
| [18:57] | Oh my god. Someone is trying to steal the Perfect Pants! | 天哪 有人想要偷走完美小裤裤 |
| [19:00] | There’ll be die-hard consequences for this! | 会有不可预计的后果的 |
| [19:02] | Francis, find whoever is stealing the Perfect Pants, | Francis 找出想偷完美小裤裤的小偷 |
| [19:05] | and stop them! | 然后阻止他们 |
| [19:06] | Do-this-do-that. | 叫我做东做西 |
| [19:07] | You-are-terrible-parents. | 你们是最糟糕的父母 |
| [19:09] | You-have-made-it-impossible-for-me- | 你让我再难以相信 |
| [19:11] | to-trust-another-human-being. | 其他人类了 |
| [19:13] | You-are-terrible-parents. | 你们是最糟糕的父母 |
| [19:21] | Jamie! I should have known it was you. | Jamie 我早该想到是你 |
| [19:24] | You are in so much trouble. | 你的麻烦大发了 |
| [19:26] | You are grounded. Do you hear me? | 你会被关禁闭 听到了么 |
| [19:28] | That means no TV, no phone privileges, | 这意味着不许看电视 不许打电话 |
| [19:31] | no going out with your friends. Nothing! | 不许跟朋友外出 什么都被禁止 |
| [19:37] | The moral of the story is that | 这个故事告诉我们的道理就是 |
| [19:39] | I’ll screw you over in a heartbeat, | 我也会像我的那些老哥一样 |
| [19:40] | the way my brothers do me. | 把你也好好的坑上一番 |
| [19:42] | That’s the way it works around here. | 这就是生活在这里的潜规则 |
| [19:45] | Oh, you’re asleep. | 哦 你睡着了 |
| [19:49] | Don’t worry, Dewey. | 别担心 Dewey |
| [19:50] | We’ve got Jamie’s noo-noo. | 我们把Jamie的奶嘴拿来了 |
| [19:52] | What are you doing? | 你们在干什么 |
| [19:56] | See? That’s all he needed. | 看到了 有了这个玩意就搞定了 |
| [19:58] | Ok, everybody relax, I got the diapers. | 好的 所有人冷静 我买了尿布回来 |
| [20:00] | Dad! | 老爸 |
| [20:00] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [20:01] | Way to go, Jamie was just asleep. | 你看你干了啥 Jamie刚刚才睡着 |
| [20:02] | Well, how am I supposed to know that?! | 我怎么能知道 |
| [20:16] | What is going on here? | 这又怎么了 |
| [20:18] | Oh my god, is that a newspaper diaper? | 我的天啊 那是个报纸糊的尿布么 |
| [20:22] | What have you been doing? | 你们干了些什么好事 |
| [20:24] | You’ve got this baby so agitated, | 你们惹恼了宝宝 |
| [20:25] | he’s going to be up all night! | 他今晚一晚肯定都睡不着了 |
| [20:28] | We could take Jamie for a drive. | 我们可以带Jamie出去兜兜风 |
| [20:30] | That always puts him to sleep. | 这会让他安然入睡 |
| [20:31] | At this hour? | 在这个点 |
| [20:34] | I can get use to this. | 我说不定会坐习惯了 |
| [20:36] | I’ve never been in a limousine this big before. | 我从没坐过这么大的加长豪车 |
| [20:39] | Yeah right. | 好吧 你确实没有 |