| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | What happened to donuts? | 甜甜圈怎么了 |
| [00:04] | This thing is mostly hole. | 这玩意几乎全是洞 |
| [00:07] | I think they’re making the middle bigger. | 我觉得他们把洞加大了 |
| [00:08] | I bought a dozen donuts and a dozen donut holes. | 我买了十二个甜甜圈 十二个洞 |
| [00:11] | They don’t match up. Somebody’s getting rich. | 结果对不上 肯定有人在中饱私囊 |
| [00:15] | Hey, there they are. | 你们回来了 |
| [00:17] | How’d the, uh, doctors appointments go? | 看医生一切顺利吧 |
| [00:19] | Turns out Teddy needs glasses, like, a lot. | 泰迪近视了 而且度数很高 |
| [00:22] | The doctor was pretty judgmental. | 医生还挺瞧不起人的 |
| [00:25] | I got, like, six lollipops. | 我拿到了六根棒棒糖 |
| [00:27] | I got nothing because I’m perfect. | 我什么都没有 因为太完美了 |
| [00:32] | Well, don’t worry about it, buddy. | 别担心 宝贝 |
| [00:33] | We’ll get it handled. Go get a snack. | 我们来处理 去吃零食吧 |
| [00:36] | He needs glasses. | 他近视了 |
| [00:38] | That explains so much. | 我忽然想通了很多事 |
| [00:41] | Also, Katie needs braces. | 还有 凯蒂要戴牙套 |
| [00:44] | Ugh, I’m gonna look so dorky. | 到时候肯定看起来蠢爆了 |
| [00:46] | Can I please get the plastic invisible ones? | 我能不能戴透明塑料的那种 |
| [00:48] | I don’t see why not. | 为什么不行 |
| [00:49] | They’re $6,000. | 要花六千块 |
| [00:50] | I see exactly why not. | 我知道为什么不行了 |
| [00:52] | Great. Well, I’ll have metal mouth. | 好吧 以后我就满嘴金属了 |
| [00:54] | Guess you can use my face to open your beers. | 以后啤酒盖都可以用我的嘴来开 |
| [00:57] | That’s the spirit. | 这主意不错 |
| [01:00] | -牙套和眼镜 -是啊 | |
| [01:02] | -你可得赶紧发一笔横财了 -是啊 | |
| [01:04] | Well, I’ve got an idea. | 我有个办法 |
| [01:06] | How would you feel about taking a tumble | 你想不想去商场扶梯上 |
| [01:08] | down the escalator at the mall? | 摔一跤滚下去 |
| [01:11] | I know a guy. He can push you. | 我认识一个人 可以推你 |
| [01:12] | You don’t even need the courage. | 你甚至都不用鼓起勇气 |
| [01:15] | We’ll be fine. | 算了 |
| [01:16] | We have insurance. | 我们有医保 |
| [01:18] | But you came up with that escalator thing pretty quick. | 但是你这个扶梯的点子来得挺快啊 |
| [01:21] | Next time we go to the mall, you’re walking in front. | 下次我们去逛商场 你要走前面 |
| [01:25] | Look at this. | 你看 |
| [01:27] | Our insurance only gives us $30 for Teddy’s glasses. | 泰迪的眼镜 医保只给三十美金 |
| [01:30] | Where are we supposed to buy them? | 我们要去哪里买 |
| [01:32] | The spinny thing at the drugstore? | 不然去药店的柜台买 |
| [01:35] | Well, the drugstore has good stuff. | 药店的东西确实不错 |
| [01:37] | That’s where I get my sexy sweatpants you like. | 我的性感运动裤都在那儿买的 你很喜欢 |
| [01:42] | And check this out. | 你看这个 |
| [01:43] | The deductible for Katie’s braces | 凯蒂的牙套免赔额 |
| [01:44] | is more than the cost of the actual braces. | 甚至比实际要花的总额还高 |
| [01:46] | Well, they do cover leg braces. | 这毕竟还包括腿部支架 |
| [01:51] | Might as well get her those if they’re giving them away. | 如果这个免费送的话 不要白不要 |
| [01:54] | Ugh, we can’t afford all this. | 这些我们肯定买不起 |
| [01:56] | 那个口腔矫正医生有理财工具 | |
| [01:58] | He gave me a brochure, | 他还给了我张传单 |
| [01:59] | but I dropped it when Teddy walked into the fish tank. | 但我没拿住 当时泰迪撞到鱼缸上去了 |
| [02:03] | He really can’t see. | 他真的看不清 |
| [02:04] | We should be ashamed of ourselves. | 我们应该以此为耻 |
| [02:06] | The Burns men don’t do financing. | 伯恩斯家的男人从不理财 |
| [02:08] | You end up paying triple. | 最后肯定要花三倍的钱 |
| [02:10] | Be cheaper to just send Katie to England | 还不如直接送凯蒂去英国 |
| [02:11] | to live with the rest of the snaggle-toothers. | 跟其他牙齿畸形的人一起生活 |
| [02:16] | Well, we have to find the money somewhere. | 我们得想其他办法赚钱 |
| [02:21] | Maybe we should go to the mall and talk about it. | 不然我们去商场里聊一聊吧 |
| [02:26] | I’m not falling down an escalator, Andi. | 我不要从扶梯上滚下去 安迪 |
| [02:29] | Why not? You fall off stuff all the time. | 为什么不行 你总是摔倒 |
| [02:31] | Let’s start making some money. | 不如借此赚点钱 |
| [02:39] | Hey, pretty lady. | 美女 |
| [02:41] | I’m wearing my drugstore sweats. | 我穿着性感药店运动裤哦 |
| [02:43] | Let’s get crazy. | 要不要玩一玩 |
| [02:46] | You know what’s crazy is how tight our budget already is. | 还玩一玩 咱们的预算都快”玩”完了 |
| [02:50] | So fooling around is out? | 所以不跟我玩了吗 |
| [02:53] | Okay, let’s talk money. | 好吧 那聊钱的事吧 |
| [02:55] | What’s in our rainy day fund? | 咱们的应急资金里有多少钱 |
| [02:57] | $175. Yeah. | 175 没错 |
| [02:59] | Which one of Kate’s teeth | 你想用这笔钱 |
| [03:00] | would you like to straighten with that? | 矫正凯蒂的哪颗牙 |
| [03:02] | I thought we agreed to keep that tone out of the bedroom. | 咱们不是说好 卧室里不这么说话吗 |
| [03:05] | Okay, well, I printed out our budget. | 好吧 我把预算打印出来了 |
| [03:07] | And, uh, this page is our necessities. | 这一页是必要支出 |
| [03:10] | You know, mortgage, groceries, stuff like that. | 房贷 日用品 等等 |
| [03:12] | And this page is our extras. | 这一页是额外支出 |
| [03:15] | And, um, your cable sports packages | 你的电视体育节目套餐 |
| [03:18] | seem to be our biggest extra. | 似乎是最大的额外支出 |
| [03:21] | Hold on. No sex, no sports? | 等等 不能滚床单 还不能看球赛 |
| [03:23] | I’m sorry I even came in here. | 我就不该走进来 |
| [03:25] | I’m not giving up my sports packages. | 我绝对不要放弃球赛套餐 |
| [03:27] | Adam, you bought, like, eight of them. | 亚当 你买了八个套餐 |
| [03:29] | I mean, you shouldn’t have more sports channels than children. | 你的体育频道不应该比孩子还多吧 |
| [03:32] | Then let’s have more children. | 那就多生几个孩子 |
| [03:34] | No. Forget I said that. | 算了 当我没说 |
| [03:36] | Look, Andi, these sports packages | 听我说 安迪 这些体育套餐 |
| [03:38] | are the only thing I have left that makes me happy. | 是唯一能够让我快乐的东西了 |
| [03:40] | Well, besides you and the kids. Blah, blah, blah. | 当然除了你还有孩子们什么的 |
| [03:44] | Look, I know you love them, | 我知道你很爱它们 |
| [03:45] | but I-I-I think they have to go. | 但它们必须离开 |
| [03:47] | The kids? Okay. | 你是说孩子们吗 好 |
| [03:50] | But wait a minute, hold on. What about your extras? | 等等 你的额外支出了 |
| [03:52] | Maybe we can get rid of one of those. | 要不也去掉一个 |
| [03:54] | No, I don’t have any extras. | 我没有额外支出 |
| [03:56] | I already gave them all up for the family. | 为了这个家 我已经全部放弃 |
| [04:00] | Then I guess there’s no coming back from that. | 这话我肯定没办法反驳了 |
| [04:04] | Fine, okay. I’ll cancel my sports packages. | 好吧 我会取消体育节目订阅 |
| [04:07] | I know it hurts, honey, but you’re doing the right thing. | 我知道你很难过 但你做的是对的 |
| [04:10] | If it helps, you’re kind of being a hero. | 如果有用的话 你这样做是个英雄 |
| [04:13] | A hero, huh? | 英雄是吗 |
| [04:15] | That does help. | 这样说挺有用的 |
| [04:17] | Hero. As in… | 英雄 你是说… |
| [04:19] | I’d like to dedicate this Nobel Prize to my father, | 我希望能将诺贝尔奖颁发给我的父亲 |
| [04:22] | Adam Burns, the real hero. | 亚当•伯恩斯 真正的英雄 |
| [04:25] | Whatever gets you there, babe. | 你想怎么想就怎么想吧 宝贝 |
| [04:28] | Ugh, the only thing is | 我比较头疼的是 |
| [04:30] | I don’t know how I’m gonna tell the guys. | 该怎么跟他们说 |
| [04:31] | They love coming over here to watch the games. | 他们可喜欢过来跟我看球赛了 |
| [04:33] | Our house is where Pittsburgh comes to play. | 我们家简直是匹兹堡的游乐圣地 |
| [04:36] | I know, honey, but I guess from now on, | 我知道 亲爱的 但是从今往后 |
| [04:39] | Pittsburgh’s just gonna have to play with itself. | 匹兹堡只能自己玩了 |
| [04:43] | I know how Pittsburgh feels. | 我知道匹兹堡的感觉 |
| [04:59] | Okay, I know this is your last sports package game, | 我知道今天是最后一次看球赛了 |
| [05:02] | but on the upside, I made mini pizzas. | 不过看好的一面 我做了迷你披萨 |
| [05:07] | I’m torn. I’m mad at you for taking away our sports, | 我好生气 我恨你抢走了我们的比赛 |
| [05:10] | but I’m impressed by these tiny pepperonis. | 但这些迷你腊肉肠好厉害 |
| [05:12] | What did you use, a hole punch? | 你是怎么做到的 用压孔机吗 |
| [05:15] | I just nibbled them down to size. | 没有 都是我啃出来的 |
| [05:21] | Man, this stinks. | 真够糟心的 |
| [05:23] | If I’m not here watching the game, I have to go home. | 要是不能来这里看球 我只能回家 |
| [05:25] | That’s where my wife lives. | 我老婆就在家里 |
| [05:29] | This is our time and Andi took it. | 我们的快乐时光被安迪抢走了 |
| [05:31] | I fought hard to get in here. | 我抗争得很辛苦才来到这里 |
| [05:33] | I’m not gonna lose it just because you took a vow | 我不能因为你跟酒吧里认识的妞发了婚誓 |
| [05:34] | with some hussy you met in a bar. | 就放弃这一切 |
| [05:37] | Look, I know it’s tough, | 我知道你心里不好受 |
| [05:38] | but some situations call for a hero, | 但有些时候需要英雄 |
| [05:40] | a man who’s willing to step up | 需要一个勇于挺身而出 |
| [05:41] | and do what’s right for his family. | 为家庭做出贡献的人 |
| [05:43] | Well, can you find that guy | 你能不能叫那个人 |
| [05:44] | and ask him to bring me a regular size pizza? | 给我带点正常尺寸的披萨 |
| [05:50] | Okay, Dad, you and Mom were always on a budget. | 话说 爸 你跟妈一直在考虑预算 |
| [05:52] | How did you pay for stuff when Don and I were growing up? | 我和老唐小时候 你们是怎么腾出钱的 |
| [05:55] | Well, we just chose the kid with the most potential | 我们只是选了最有潜力的小孩 |
| [05:57] | and spent our resources on him. | 把资源都投在了他身上 |
| [06:01] | In our case, that was Donny. | 在这种情况下 就是老唐 |
| [06:03] | Thanks, Pop. | 谢了 老爸 |
| [06:06] | You chose him? | 你选了他吗 |
| [06:07] | Well, he seemed like the better bet. | 他看起来比较有希望 |
| [06:09] | He was bigger and he talked more. | 他长得壮 而且话多 |
| [06:11] | You just sat there chewing on your fist like an apple. | 你总是坐在那里咬拳头 |
| [06:15] | I was a baby. | 我当时还是个孩子啊 |
| [06:18] | Wait a minute, wait a minute. | 等等 |
| [06:19] | Is that why I always got cheese sandwiches | 所以我总是吃芝士三明治 |
| [06:20] | and he got bologna? | 而他能吃大红肠吗 |
| [06:21] | Exactly. And it worked. | 没错 而且奏效了 |
| [06:23] | Look how tall he is, like a redwood. | 你看他多高 跟红杉树一样 |
| [06:27] | I am majestic. Thanks again, Pop. | 我确实很壮 谢了 老爸 |
| [06:31] | I could never do that with my kids. | 我肯定不能这样对我的孩子 |
| [06:34] | Andi wouldn’t let me. | 安迪不会允许的 |
| [06:36] | Listen, if you want your sports back, | 如果你想继续看体育比赛 |
| [06:38] | you better cut something else from this budget. | 只能从这个预算表里削减其他开支了 |
| [06:40] | Where did you get that? | 你这是从哪儿拿的 |
| [06:42] | I took the long way to the bathroom. | 我厕所去得久了一些 |
| [06:44] | Folder said “Private.” Got me interested. | 文件夹写着”私密” 于是我就好奇了 |
| [06:49] | Who’s Josephine? | 约瑟芬是谁 |
| [06:50] | Give me that. | 给我 |
| [06:56] | Who is Josephine? | 约瑟芬是谁 |
| [06:57] | – She costs a fortune. – No, no, no, no. | -她可真费钱 -不不不 |
| [06:59] | You don’t need to look at that. You don’t… | 不用看那个 真的不用 |
| [07:00] | Just enjoy your pizzas. | 吃披萨就好了 |
| [07:02] | I ate two pounds of pepperoni for those. | 我为了做这个 啃了两磅的腊肉肠 |
| [07:06] | Tell me who Josephine is. | 告诉我约瑟芬是谁 |
| [07:08] | She’s my hairdresser. | 她是我的发型师 |
| [07:09] | Yeah. Josephine makes my hair all, | 对 约瑟芬能让我的头发 |
| [07:11] | you know, silky and, you know, all this one color. | 特别丝滑 而且颜色均匀 |
| [07:20] | I could do that for free. | 我可以免费帮你做 |
| [07:23] | Strip it, prime it, paint it. | 磨平 抛面 刷漆 |
| [07:24] | I’ve done it a million times. | 我做过几百次了 |
| [07:27] | Wait, why did you put your hair salon under necessities? | 等等 你为什么要把发廊放在必要支出里 |
| [07:32] | So you wouldn’t see it. | 这样你就看不到了 |
| [07:33] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [07:35] | See, I showed you the extras | 我把额外支出给你看 |
| [07:36] | and then I held back the necessities. | 把必要支出留在手里 |
| [07:37] | It was all very well thought-out. | 我仔细考虑过的 |
| [07:40] | So you’re just shuffling cash around? | 你就这样把钱挪来挪去 |
| [07:42] | That’s money laundering. | 你这是在洗钱 |
| [07:44] | – You rigged this whole thing. – Rigged! | -这是暗箱操作 -暗箱操作 |
| [07:47] | You know, there’s no cheaper way to see my game. | 我要想再看比赛 没有更便宜的办法 |
| [07:49] | None! | 没有 |
| [07:50] | – But you could easily find a bargain hair place. – Do it! | -但你可以找个便宜点的发廊 -赶紧的 |
| [07:56] | All right, Lowell, I can handle this. | 行了 洛厄尔 我可以处理 |
| [07:59] | Then handle it, man. | 那就处理啊 |
| [08:06] | What’s with him? | 他这是怎么了 |
| [08:07] | I don’t know. He had a wine spritzer. | 不知道 他喝了一杯起泡酒 |
| [08:10] | Look, honey, Josephine is a necessity. | 听我说 约瑟芬是必要支出 |
| [08:13] | All right? It’s not just a haircut. | 你明白吗 她不仅是理发师 |
| [08:15] | She rubs my shoulders. She listens to me vent. | 她还会帮我揉肩 听我抱怨 |
| [08:18] | You know that-that time with her, it keeps me going. | 跟她度过的时间 能够给我动力 |
| [08:20] | It’s my last happy thing. | 这是我最后一件快乐的事了 |
| [08:22] | It… besides you and the kids and blah, blah, blah. | 当然除了你还有孩子们什么的 |
| [08:25] | Well, that’s how I feel about my sports. | 我对体育比赛就是这个感觉 |
| [08:28] | It’s a few hours a week where I don’t have to worry | 每周只有这几个小时 我可以不必担心 |
| [08:30] | about all the stuff I have to worry about. | 平时需要担心的事 |
| [08:32] | For example, you keeping two sets of books like the mob. | 比如你跟黑帮一样 做两套账本 |
| [08:36] | Well, I don’t want to give up my one last thing. | 我不想放弃最后一件开心的事 |
| [08:39] | Well, I don’t want to give up mine, either. | 我也不想放弃我的 |
| [08:41] | Well, look, one if us gonna have to bite the bullet. | 好吧 总有人得挨枪子 |
| [08:43] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [08:45] | I think I know a way we can settle this like adults. | 我知道有个很成熟的办法可以解决 |
| [08:48] | Then settle it. | 那就解决啊 |
| [08:49] | All right. Lowell. | 够了 洛厄尔 |
| [08:52] | You’re gonna have to go take a walk or something. | 请你出去散个步什么的吧 |
| [08:59] | Okay, what’s your plan? | 你打算怎么做 |
| [09:00] | How are we gonna settle this like adults? | 所谓的成熟办法是什么 |
| [09:03] | Rock, paper, scissors. | 剪刀石头布 |
| [09:04] | -准备好了吗 -好 | |
| [09:05] | – One, two… – Wait, wait, wait. | -一 二 -等等 |
| [09:07] | I want this to be fair. | 我想对你公平点 |
| [09:08] | So, I have to tell you, I know you’re gonna do rock. | 我必须告诉你 我知道你要出石头 |
| [09:11] | You always do rock. | 你总是出石头 |
| [09:13] | Well, that’s because I disagree that anything could beat rock. | 那是因为我觉得石头是无敌的 |
| [09:16] | Paper beats rock. | 布赢石头 |
| [09:17] | Okay, you throw a piece of paper at me, | 行 你朝我扔块布 |
| [09:19] | I’ll throw a rock at you, let’s see who’s happier. | 我朝你扔块石头 看谁伤得重 |
| [09:22] | Okay, forget I said anything. Ready? | 好吧 当我没说 开始吧 |
| [09:24] | – One, two… – Wait, wait, wait. | -一 二 -等等 |
| [09:26] | Okay, now that you know I’m gonna throw rock, | 你现在知道我要出石头 |
| [09:27] | I’m gonna change it. | 我要换了 |
| [09:30] | So you’re still going with rock? | 你还打算出石头吧 |
| [09:32] | Well, that was the plan, but I’m really gonna change it. | 本来是这么想的 但这回真的要改了 |
| [09:35] | Okay, here we go. | 开始吧 |
| [09:36] | Winner keeps their favorite thing. | 赢了就可以保留最爱 |
| [09:38] | Loser gives it up. | 输了就放弃 |
| [09:39] | One, two, three, shoot. | 一 二 三 出 |
| [09:42] | That’s what I’m talking about. | 这还差不多 |
| [09:44] | Paper crushes rock. | 我的布包死你 |
| [09:46] | -我猜透了你的想法 对吧 -是啊 | |
| [09:49] | I had a good 15-year winning streak there, | 我连续十五年都赢了你 |
| [09:51] | but you got me, so I will cancel my hair place. | 但这次你赢了 我会取消我的发廊 |
| [09:57] | Are you gonna be generous and classy about this? | 你居然这么大方 这么慷慨吗 |
| [10:01] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [10:03] | Well, it’s no fun to beat someone | 你这么慷慨大方 |
| [10:04] | who’s generous and classy. | 我赢你还有什么意思 |
| [10:08] | Aw, all right, all right, look. How about this? | 好的 好的 这样吧 |
| [10:09] | How about if we both give up our favorite thing? | 我们两个都放弃最爱 |
| [10:12] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [10:13] | Hey, the only way we can both be happy | 唯一让我们两个都满意的方法 |
| [10:15] | is if we’re both unhappy. | 就是我们两个都不满意 |
| [10:17] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [10:18] | That’s what marriage is. | 这就是婚姻的真谛 |
| [10:21] | Got to say, I’m impressed. | 不得不说 我很意外 |
| [10:24] | 是吗 | |
| [10:25] | Well, you should be. I mean, most people, | 这是应该的 大部分人 |
| [10:28] | they have to read about what a hero does. | 只能看到英雄事迹的文字 |
| [10:30] | But you, you’re getting to see it firsthand. | 而你有机会看现场的 |
| [10:32] | You’re… you’re a lucky lady. | 你可走运了 姑娘 |
| [10:39] | What are you watching? | 你在看什么 |
| [10:41] | Well, all the sports are gone | 所有的运动台都没了 |
| [10:42] | so I’m watching The Weather Channel. | 我只能看天气台了 |
| [10:46] | San Diego’s beating Buffalo by 60 degrees. | 圣地亚哥赢了水牛城60度 |
| [10:51] | Hey, buddy. | 小伙子 |
| [10:53] | Now that you got your new glasses, | 既然你有新眼镜了 |
| [10:54] | let me try something. | 我们试试新活动 |
| [10:55] | Catch. | 接住 |
| [10:58] | I knew you could do that! | 我就知道你可以的 |
| [11:01] | I’m good at stuff! | 我终于有擅长的东西了 |
| [11:05] | Well, hopefully he can hit the toilet now. | 希望他现在能瞄准马桶尿尿了 |
| [11:09] | Hey, honey. | 亲爱的 |
| [11:13] | What’s wrong? | 怎么了 |
| [11:15] | I went to Jiffy Cuts. | 我去了速剪发廊 |
| [11:18] | And this happened. | 就变成了这样 |
| [11:22] | Oh, boy. | 天啊 |
| [11:24] | My new hairdresser, whose name is Cricket, | 我的新发型师叫蟋蟀 |
| [11:27] | was texting her boyfriend, whose name is Sledge. | 在给名字叫雪橇的男友发信息 |
| [11:31] | This country is doomed. | 这国家完蛋了 |
| [11:34] | She was distracted, so instead of using brown dye, | 所以她一分心 把漂白剂当成了 |
| [11:36] | she used bleach. | 棕色染发剂 |
| [11:38] | Oh, but… | 不过 |
| [11:40] | the good news is that while she was shampooing my hair, | 好消息是 她给我洗头的时候 |
| [11:43] | her nose ring fell into my mouth. | 鼻环掉进我嘴里了 |
| [11:48] | Sounds like you had a jam-packed morning. | 你这一上午挺忙啊 |
| [11:52] | But didn’t it feel good to save money? | 但省钱的感觉不好吗 |
| [11:54] | Huh? Come on. | 拜托 |
| [11:55] | It’s for the kids. | 都是为了孩子 |
| [11:57] | Oh, you’re right. You’re right. | 你说得对 没错 |
| [11:59] | This is, this is all so Katie can have straight teeth. | 为了凯蒂能有排齐牙 这一切都值了 |
| [12:01] | Yeah, and Teddy, with his new glasses, | 泰迪戴上新眼镜以后 |
| [12:03] | I threw him the ball and he caught it. | 能接住我扔的球了 |
| [12:05] | And not with his face. | 不是用脸接哦 |
| [12:07] | We’re doing great things here. | 我们做的事非常值得 |
| [12:09] | Yes, we are. | 没错 |
| [12:11] | 这一切都值了 | |
| [12:12] | And we can save even more money on Halloween. | 我们过万圣节也省钱了 |
| [12:16] | Do you need to buy a costume? | 你还用买新服装吗 |
| [12:17] | No, you’re already wearing it on your head. | 不用 你头上戴着呢 |
| [12:33] | What’s going on? | 怎么了 |
| [12:35] | – We’re having an intervention. – Wha…? | -我们要开批斗大会 -什么 |
| [12:37] | You let Andi take away our sports. | 你让安迪夺走了我们的球赛 |
| [12:39] | You never handled it, man. | 你根本没处理好 兄弟 |
| [12:42] | I blame myself. | 都怪我 |
| [12:44] | Maybe if you’d had a little bologna as a kid, | 要是小时候给你吃点大红肠 |
| [12:46] | you could stand up to your wife. | 可能就会强大起来 面对老婆 |
| [12:48] | Okay, look, this is hard on me, too. | 听着 这对我来说也很困难 |
| [12:51] | That was my thing, my very last thing, | 那是我的爱 我最爱的东西 |
| [12:53] | but I told Andi I’d give it up. | 但我告诉安迪 我放弃了 |
| [12:54] | But she played dirty. | 可她玩阴的 |
| [12:56] | She didn’t even tell you about her hair lady. | 她都没把造型师的事告诉你 |
| [12:58] | That’s true. | 这倒是 |
| [12:59] | And who won rock, paper, scissors? | 石头剪子布谁赢了 |
| [13:00] | I did. | 我赢了 |
| [13:02] | I double outsmarted her. | 我比她聪明 |
| [13:04] | Did you? | 有吗 |
| [13:07] | But now I’m stuck watching cooking shows with Marcy. | 现在我只能和玛茜一起看美食节目了 |
| [13:11] | I’m real sad, brother. | 非常凄惨 兄弟 |
| [13:13] | You hear that? | 你听到了吗 |
| [13:14] | Do something, boy. | 采取点行动 儿子 |
| [13:16] | You just made a mighty redwood cry. | 你把一棵大红杉树气哭了 |
| [13:24] | Teddy, where are your glasses? | 泰迪 你的眼镜呢 |
| [13:29] | I lost them. | 我弄丢了 |
| [13:30] | Already? | 这么快 |
| [13:32] | I’m not used to having them. | 我不习惯戴眼镜 |
| [13:33] | When I go somewhere, everything else on my face | 一般不管我去哪 脸上的东西 |
| [13:34] | just comes with me. | 会自动跟我走 |
| [13:36] | Okay, well, go look for ’em. | 好了 去找找 |
| [13:37] | Your dad’s in the garage. I’ll go get him to help. | 你爸在车库呢 我去帮他忙 |
| [13:40] | Okay, Kate, your last meal before braces, | 好了 凯蒂 带牙套前的最后一餐 |
| [13:42] | just like you ordered. | 按你要求的 |
| [13:44] | Popcorn, salt water taffy and beef jerky. | 爆米花 盐水太妃糖和牛肉干 |
| [13:49] | You know, those three things are gonna meet in your stomach | 这三样东西会在你的胃里相遇 |
| [13:51] | and they are not gonna be friends. | 他们仨绝对不好相处 |
| [13:53] | I don’t even want braces. | 我根本不想带牙套 |
| [13:55] | How about this: just give me the money | 这样吧 钱给我 |
| [13:57] | and I’ll push my teeth together with my fingers. Huh? See. | 我自己用手把牙推齐 这样 |
| [14:02] | Honey, I know it stinks, all right? | 宝贝 我知道很糟心 |
| [14:04] | But if it helps, it-it stinks for all of us. | 但你想想 我们大家都很糟心 |
| [14:06] | I mean, your dad gave up his sports | 你爸放弃了球赛 |
| [14:08] | and I look like I’m trying to murder 101 Dalmatians. | 而我现在像要谋杀101忠狗的恶女人 |
| [14:16] | I hope Andi doesn’t find out you bought the sports package | 希望安迪不会发现你在网上买了 |
| [14:18] | on the Internet! | 体育台的套餐 |
| [14:20] | It would help if you didn’t scream it | 你要是不嘶声力竭喊出来 |
| [14:22] | at the top of your lungs. | 就算帮忙了 |
| [14:23] | My bad! | 我错了 |
| [14:26] | Crosby stole the puck. Come on. | 克罗斯比偷到球了 加油 |
| [14:27] | Come on. Go, go. | 加油 上 上 |
| [14:34] | Look who’s here. | 瞧谁来了 |
| [14:36] | What’s going on? | 怎么回事 |
| [14:39] | Uh, okay, it’s not what you think. | 不是你想的那样 |
| [14:40] | We were, um, watching an adult movie. | 我们在 看成人片 |
| [14:44] | 真的吗 | |
| [14:46] | ‘Cause there was a lot of high-fiving. | 你们刚刚都在击掌 |
| [14:49] | It was very inspirational. | 非常振奋人心的画面 |
| [14:53] | Okay, look, I canceled all the cable sports like I promised, | 听着 我如约取消了所有体育台 |
| [14:56] | but due to the miracle of technology, | 可多亏了科技奇迹 |
| [14:58] | I found all the games on the Internet. | 我在网上找到了所有的比赛 |
| [15:00] | For free? | 免费的 |
| [15:02] | Free of you knowing about it. | 你免费知道这个消息了 |
| [15:05] | So you were just gonna hide the expense in the Internet bill? | 所以你准备把这高昂的费用藏进网费里 |
| [15:08] | Well… | 好吧 |
| [15:09] | Whose idea was this? | 这是谁的主意 |
| [15:11] | It was mine and I’m not sorry. | 我的 且我并不愧疚 |
| [15:14] | You might be the wife, | 就算你是老婆 |
| [15:15] | but I’m the hockey buddy; I have a voice here. | 我还是他的冰球伙伴呢 我也有发言权 |
| [15:18] | Really, Lowell? | 真要这样吗 |
| [15:20] | You really want to go up against the wife? | 你真想跟老婆比吗 |
| [15:23] | To be honest, I’m losing steam. | 说实话 我泄气了 |
| [15:27] | How was this even supposed to work? | 这怎么可能瞒得过我呢 |
| [15:28] | I was ten feet away. | 我就在隔壁 |
| [15:30] | Well, we had a plan. | 我们本来有计划的 |
| [15:32] | My dad was supposed to be a lookout. | 我爸应该去放风的 |
| [15:35] | Oh, yeah. Your wife’s coming. | 对了 你老婆来了 |
| [15:43] | I can’t believe you bought the sports packages again. | 不敢相信 你又买了体育套餐 |
| [15:46] | Okay, I admit, it looks bad, but you know what? | 我知道看起来有点过分 但你知道吗 |
| [15:49] | I won rock, paper, scissors fair and square. | 我的石头剪刀布赢得光明正大 |
| [15:51] | Okay, that’s school yard rules, no backsies. | 操场的规矩 不许反悔 |
| [15:55] | That’s your argument? | 这就是你的解释 |
| [15:57] | Well, originally it was Don’s argument, | 其实是大唐的说法 |
| [15:59] | which explains why it isn’t working. | 所以根本站不住脚 |
| [16:02] | Actually, it’s true. | 其实 是真的 |
| [16:04] | It is? I mean, it is. | 是吗 对 是的 |
| [16:07] | Look, I’ll tell you what. | 我跟你说 |
| [16:08] | I already gave up Josephine, you have your sports back. | 我已经放弃了约瑟芬 你继续看你的球赛 |
| [16:11] | Everything works out. | 一切都解决了 |
| [16:13] | Plus, four more punches on my Jiffy Cuts card | 而且我的速剪发廊会员卡再集齐四个点 |
| [16:14] | and I get a free beer koozie. | 就会给我个免费啤酒保温套 |
| [16:19] | So I do something sneaky and you just give up? | 我背着你干了点事 你就放过了 |
| [16:22] | No, no, no, no, no, no, no. | 不可能的 |
| [16:25] | The hairs on the back of my neck are standing up. | 我后背的汗毛都竖起来了 |
| [16:27] | What’s the catch? | 后招在哪呢 |
| [16:28] | There’s no catch. I’m happy to do it. | 没有后招 我很乐意的 |
| [16:31] | You know, and years from now, | 多年以后 |
| [16:32] | when the kids are accepting some award, | 等孩子们得奖了 |
| [16:34] | they’ll probably thank me for being such a hero | 他们也许会感谢我这个牺牲自己的英雄 |
| [16:36] | or, I don’t know, something like that. | 或者之类的吧 |
| [16:38] | Wait, wait, wait, what’d you say? | 等等 你说什么 |
| [16:39] | I said I’m happy to do it. | 我说我很乐意 |
| [16:41] | No, after that. You said you’d be the hero? | 不 之后的话 你说你会当英雄 |
| [16:42] | -不用说的事 -那你为什么说 | |
| [16:44] | – Because I’d be the hero. – But I like being the hero. | -因为我要当英雄了 -可我喜欢当英雄 |
| [16:46] | Well, you can’t be the hero if you don’t make the sacrifice. | 不做牺牲是不能当英雄的 |
| [16:47] | Then I’m giving up my sports. | 那我就放弃我的球赛 |
| [16:48] | Too late. I already gave up my hair. | 太晚了 我已经放弃了我的头发 |
| [16:50] | Over my dead body. I’m giving up my sports and that’s final. | 别做梦了 我要放弃我的球赛 句号 |
| [16:54] | Fine. I’ll call Josephine and make an appointment. | 好吧 我给约瑟芬打电话预约 |
| [16:55] | You’re damn right you will. | 你必须赶紧去 |
| [16:58] | Okay, it’s settled. | 好的 就这么定了 |
| [17:05] | Oh, Andi! | 哦 安迪 |
| [17:08] | That was low. | 这招太损了 |
| [17:11] | At least I didn’t play mind games with you. | 至少我没跟你玩心眼 |
| [17:13] | I had the decency to straight-up lie. | 还是当面骗你的 |
| [17:15] | That’s what a real hero does! | 这才是真英雄所为 |
| [17:18] | Come on, Adam, it’s my hair. | 拜托 亚当 这是我的头发 |
| [17:20] | My hair. | 我的头发 |
| [17:21] | Yesterday, at the park, a skunk tried to hump my leg. | 昨天我去公园 有只臭鼬试图上我的腿 |
| [17:25] | Well, of course he did. You’re sexy. | 当然会了 你这么性感 |
| [17:29] | Oh, and at work, they made a new name tag for me. | 在公司 他们给我做了个新的名牌 |
| [17:32] | It says Cruella de Burns. | 伯恩斯家的恶女人 |
| [17:35] | You have to go through three departments | 想拿新名牌 要三个部门 |
| [17:36] | to get a name tag. | 给我签字 |
| [17:37] | A vice president had to sign off on it. | 还需要一位副总裁的签字 |
| [17:40] | All right, okay, you know what? | 好吧 这样吧 |
| [17:42] | I’m gonna figure out a way we can both get what we want. | 我来想办法 让我们俩都能得到自己的最爱 |
| [17:45] | – What are you gonna do? – I don’t know, but I love you. | -你准备怎么办 -不知道 但我爱你 |
| [17:47] | I’m not gonna let people make fun of you. | 我不会让别人取笑你的 |
| [17:48] | Only I get to do that. | 只有我可以 |
| [17:49] | That is my right as your husband! | 这是你的丈夫 我的权利 |
| [17:54] | That’s right. | 就是这样 |
| [17:57] | That is good stuff. | 真是极品 |
| [18:03] | I just got us enough money to pay for the braces, | 我搞到了足够的钱 足够牙套 |
| [18:06] | the glasses, your hair, everything. | 眼镜 你的头发 一切 |
| [18:08] | Oh, my God, did you do the escalator thing? | 天啊 你去滚扶梯了吗 |
| [18:12] | No, no. I sold the motorcycle. | 没有 我把摩托车卖了 |
| [18:15] | What? It’s not even finished. | 什么 它还没修好呢 |
| [18:17] | Well, Don and I stayed up all night working on it. | 我和大唐修了一夜 修好了 |
| [18:20] | Check it out. | 你来看 |
| [18:22] | Holy crap! | 我的妈呀 |
| [18:25] | You got this much for that old bike? | 那台旧摩托卖了这么多钱 |
| [18:28] | I may have told the guy it used to belong to Steve McQueen. | 因为我说这车以前是史提夫•麦昆的 |
| [18:32] | You are the sweetest hero ever. | 你真是最贴心的英雄 |
| [18:35] | Oh, I can’t wait to call Josephine and get my hair fixed. | 我等不及让约瑟芬赶紧补救我的头发 |
| [18:38] | Oh, I’m gonna call the cable company | 我要打电话给有线台 |
| [18:40] | 赶快让欢乐重新回到荧屏 | |
| [18:44] | Mom, look at my face. | 妈 看我的脸 |
| [18:47] | Oh, no, what happened? | 不 怎么搞的 |
| [18:48] | The school nurse says I’m having an allergic reaction | 学校的护士说我对牙套里的镍 |
| [18:50] | to the nickel in my braces. | 起了过敏反应 |
| [18:52] | Oh, honey, I’m so sorry. | 亲爱的 太可怜了 |
| [18:55] | At least you don’t have Mom’s hair, huh? | 至少你的头发不像你妈妈 |
| [18:57] | And that’s it for those. | 他们太过分了 |
| [19:00] | Honey, go upstairs and wash your face. | 宝贝 上楼洗洗脸 |
| [19:02] | I’ll be right up to put some medicine on it. | 我马上给你涂点药 |
| [19:04] | Okay, thanks. | 好的 谢谢 |
| [19:06] | I guess this means I’m getting the invisible ones. | 是不是意味着我可以戴隐形的了 |
| [19:12] | How much are the plastic braces again? | 塑料牙套多少钱来着 |
| [19:14] | 3,000 more. | 三千多 |
| [19:16] | Oh, you got to be kidding me. | 一定是在玩我吧 |
| [19:24] | What was that? | 什么声音 |
| [19:26] | I think you just found Teddy’s glasses. | 你刚刚找到了泰迪的眼镜 |
| [19:35] | Well, there goes your sports. | 跟你的体育台说再见 |
| [19:38] | And your hair. | 还有你的头发 |
| [19:41] | But we still got each other. | 至少我们还有彼此 |
| [19:52] | – This is nice. – Yeah, look at us, huh? | -这样很美好 -对 瞧瞧我们 |
| [19:55] | Even on a budget, we could still have fun. | 就算手头紧 还是可以有情趣 |
| [19:58] | I got my hockey on the radio. You’re getting your hair fixed. | 我听着广播台里的冰球比赛 你能补救你的头发 |
| [20:02] | I’m not sure you should be doing it by candlelight, | 也许你不应该在烛光下弄头发 |
| [20:04] | but I’m half schnockered, so whatevs. | 但我已经半醉了 随便吧 |
| [20:07] | You got nothing to worry about, babe. | 什么都不用担心 宝贝 |
| [20:09] | Just like painting a fence. | 这就像漆栅栏 |
| [20:12] | Get it cleanly… Crosby to the net! He scores! | 无人防守 克罗斯比射门 得分 |
| [20:20] | What happened? | 怎么了 |
| [20:21] | We just took the lead. | 我们领先了 |
| [20:23] | My hair, Adam. | 我说的是头发 |
| [20:25] | Nothing! | 没事 |
| [20:27] | But what didn’t happened on this side | 就是这边没发生的事 |
| [20:31] | needs to also not happened on this side. | 需要在这边也没发生一下 |