| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Good job on your chores. | 你们的杂务干得不错 |
| [00:04] | Emme, that’s for you. | 艾米 这是你的 |
| [00:06] | Teddy, that’s for you. | 泰迪 这是你的 |
| [00:08] | Two dollars? That’s less than I pay Emme to do my chores for me. | 两美元 还没我让艾米代劳的酬金多 |
| [00:14] | Not so fast. | 别着急 |
| [00:15] | You still have one more chore. | 你还差一件活儿没干 |
| [00:17] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [00:22] | Okay, paying for a hug | 虽然这个拥抱是钱买的 |
| [00:24] | doesn’t make it any less special! | 但依然非常温馨 |
| [00:28] | So, that Halloween store downtown is going out of business. | 市中心那家万圣节店要倒闭了 |
| [00:31] | And you know how I love a good deal. | 你知道我最喜欢占便宜了 |
| [00:32] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [00:34] | So I got this for Emme. | 所以我给艾米买了这个 |
| [00:37] | Princess dress | 公主裙 |
| [00:38] | for my little princess. | 送给我的小公主 |
| [00:41] | Look, it’s sweet of you to think of Emme, | 你能想着给艾米买东西挺好的 |
| [00:43] | but you can’t give that to her. | 但你不能把这个给她 |
| [00:45] | What? Why not? | 什么 为什么不行 |
| [00:47] | Because princess stories are just a bad influence on little girls, you know? | 因为公主的故事容易教坏小姑娘 你懂吗 |
| [00:51] | It teaches ’em stuff like you need a man to save you. | 会让她们觉得 女孩子需要被男人拯救 |
| [00:55] | Who told you that? | 这是谁教你的 |
| [00:57] | Was it Beyoncé? | 是碧昂丝吗 |
| [00:58] | ‘Cause I know she’s got some mysterious hold on you. | 我知道她对你有极大的影响力 |
| [01:01] | No, no, no. Think about it, okay? | 不是 你想想 |
| [01:03] | In Beauty and the Beast, that girl was just a hostage. | 《美女与野兽》里 女孩就是被绑架了 |
| [01:06] | Yeah. She had Stockholm syndrome. | 没错 她患了斯德哥尔摩综合征[爱上绑匪] |
| [01:09] | And-and in Sleeping Beauty, uh, | 还有 在《睡美人》里 |
| [01:10] | she marries the first guy that kisses her | 她嫁给了第一个吻她的男人 |
| [01:12] | because she got roofied. | 因为她被人下了药 |
| [01:16] | What kind of message | 你觉得这条裙子 |
| [01:17] | do you think that dress sends to Emme? | 会给艾米传递什么样的讯息 |
| [01:19] | “I love you and I got you a present.” | “我爱你 我给你买了个礼物” |
| [01:23] | It’s just, I’ve been working for years | 可是我这么多年来 |
| [01:24] | to keep that stuff out of the house. | 一直努力隔绝这类文化 |
| [01:27] | I mean, when Kate was little and she wanted a princess dress, | 凯特小时候想要公主裙 |
| [01:30] | I told her she was allergic to glitter. | 我跟她说 她对亮片过敏 |
| [01:33] | I didn’t know you were doing that. | 我不知道你居然会这样做 |
| [01:35] | Yeah, it’s how I keep the kids from doing things | 没错 我就是用这种办法阻止他们 |
| [01:36] | that are bad for them. | 接触不好的事物 |
| [01:37] | I call it my protective love bubble. | 我称之为”爱的保护泡泡” |
| [01:41] | Your what bubble? | 你的什么泡泡 |
| [01:44] | My love bubble. | 爱的泡泡 |
| [01:45] | You know, little white lies that are for their own good. | 就是为孩子好而撒的那些善意谎言 |
| [01:48] | Hey, I’m not opposed to lying to our children. | 我并不反对你对孩子撒谎 |
| [01:52] | Great. So we’re agreed. | 很好 那我们达成一致了 |
| [01:53] | No, no. | 不是 |
| [01:54] | I don’t think these dresses are bad. | 可我觉得这些裙子挺好的 |
| [01:57] | You kept princesses away from Katie, | 你不让凯特喜欢公主那一套 |
| [01:59] | and– let’s be honest– she’s kind of a frowner. | 结果 说句实话 她就有点扫兴 |
| [02:02] | No, she’s not. | 没有啊 |
| [02:03] | I happen to know you pay her for hugs. | 我碰巧知道你得用钱买她的拥抱 |
| [02:07] | Emme’s my last one. | 艾米是我最后的希望 |
| [02:08] | I want a smiler. | 我想要个爱笑的 |
| [02:09] | I want a huggy smiler. | 爱笑又爱拥抱的 |
| [02:12] | – I’m taking that dress back. – No, you’re not. | -我要把那条裙子退掉 -不行 |
| [02:15] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [02:16] | We’ve been in this situation before, | 我们以前也经历过这种情况 |
| [02:18] | and it usually doesn’t end well for you. | 通常你的结局都不是太理想 |
| [02:21] | You… you may recall I have a few tricks up my sleeve. | 你也许会想起 我有不少招数 |
| [02:25] | Like your lie balloon? | 比如你的谎言气球吗 |
| [02:26] | It’s a protective love bubble. | 是”爱的保护泡泡” |
| [02:30] | Well, I’m popping it. | 那我要戳破了 |
| [02:31] | Bubble time is over. | 泡泡时间结束 |
| [02:33] | Emme, put down those gender-neutral toys! | 艾米 别玩那些中性玩具了 |
| [02:36] | Daddy got you something sparkly! | 爸爸给你买了亮晶晶的东西哦 |
| [02:42] | A toast to Princess Emme. | 敬艾米公主一杯 |
| [02:45] | Who got you that pretty dress? | 谁给你买的这条漂亮裙子呀 |
| [02:46] | You did. | 你买的 |
| [02:48] | That’s right. Daddy did. | 没错 爸爸给你买的 |
| [02:50] | And who loved it so much she wore it to bed last night? | 是谁喜欢得不行 晚上还穿着睡觉了 |
| [02:53] | – I did. – That’s right. | -是我 -没错 |
| [02:55] | Mommy’s face was so funny. | 你妈当时的表情太好笑了 |
| [03:00] | Hey, guys. | 我回来了 |
| [03:00] | There she is. | 你妈回来了 |
| [03:01] | Don’t mind us. | 不要介意我们 |
| [03:03] | We’re just having another princess tea party. | 我们只是在开公主茶话会 |
| [03:06] | There’s Mommy’s funny face again. | 你妈妈又露出了那个表情 |
| [03:09] | Emme, honey, um, | 艾米 亲爱的 |
| [03:11] | I hate to pull you away from all this fun, | 我不想打断你的欢乐时光 |
| [03:12] | but, um, | 不过 |
| [03:14] | I got you a new doll. | 我给你买了新玩具 |
| [03:15] | Yeah. And I think you are gonna love her | 而且我觉得比起那条裙子 |
| [03:17] | even more than you love your dress. | 你会更加喜欢这个的 |
| [03:19] | Who is it? Cinderella? | 是谁 灰姑娘吗 |
| [03:20] | Snow White? | 白雪公主吗 |
| [03:21] | No. E-Even better. | 不 比她们都好 |
| [03:24] | Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg! | 最高法院大法官露丝·贝德·金斯伯格 |
| [03:28] | Oh, Andi. | 安迪哪 |
| [03:32] | Why does this man have a girl name? | 这个男人为什么名字像女孩 |
| [03:35] | No, it’s a girl. | 就是女孩 |
| [03:37] | She just has more important things to do than fix her hair. | 她只是忙于重要的事 没时间打理头发 |
| [03:41] | Where are her sparkles? | 那她身上的亮晶晶呢 |
| [03:42] | On her brain. | 她脑袋灵光啊 |
| [03:44] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [03:45] | Ruth here has done | 露丝为我们的国家 |
| [03:46] | a lot of important work for our country. | 做出了许多重大贡献 |
| [03:49] | Oh, yeah? Like what? | 是吗 比如说呢 |
| [03:52] | What? | 什么 |
| [03:55] | Well, you’re such an expert on her accomplishments. | 既然你对她的成就如此了解 |
| [03:58] | We’d like to hear a few. | 我们也想听听 |
| [04:00] | Let’s see what happens. | 看看她会怎么说 |
| [04:04] | One of her accomplishments is that she doesn’t have a husband | 她其中一项成就是 她没有一个 |
| [04:06] | that asks too many questions. | 总提各种问题的老公 |
| [04:11] | Thanks, Mommy. I love her. | 谢谢妈妈 我很喜欢 |
| [04:15] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [04:17] | She can be the witch who puts a curse on the princess! | 她可以当给公主施魔咒的女巫 |
| [04:20] | No, no! She’s not a witch! | 不不 她不是女巫 |
| [04:22] | She’s a judge who’s famous for… | 她是个很有名的法官 曾经… |
| [04:24] | She’s famous for… | 曾经… |
| [04:27] | I should’ve kept the box. | 我应该留着包装盒的 |
| [04:28] | It was all on the box! | 包装盒上都写了 |
| [04:33] | And Adam lived happily ever after. | 亚当从此幸福快乐地活着 |
| [04:48] | Check out what happened to Ruth Bader Ginsburg. | 看看露丝·贝德·金斯伯格发生了什么 |
| [04:50] | She went upstairs in her judge’s robe, | 她穿着法官袍上楼 |
| [04:52] | and she came back down in a coconut bra. | 结果穿着椰子文胸下来了 |
| [05:01] | Aw, man. | 天哪 |
| [05:03] | Emme glittered Ginsburg? | 艾米居然给金斯伯格加了亮片 |
| [05:06] | I don’t mind seeing Ruth cut loose a little. | 我觉得露丝偶尔放松下也挺好的 |
| [05:10] | This is what happens when you bring princesses into our house. | 你把公主带进我们家就是会这样 |
| [05:13] | They bully the smart girls. | 她们会欺负聪明的女孩 |
| [05:16] | This dinner took an odd turn. | 最怕空气突然安静 |
| [05:19] | Hit ’em with the dessert we brought, Don. | 快拿出我们买的甜点 大唐 |
| [05:22] | Bear claws. | 熊爪 |
| [05:23] | The tastiest of all claws. | 最好吃的爪子 |
| [05:25] | Ah, I haven’t had one of these | 哇 自从泽尔纳饼屋关门之后 |
| [05:28] | since Zellner’s Bakery closed down. | 我就没吃过熊爪了 |
| [05:29] | Oh, no, no, it’s not closed; that’s where we got them. | 他们家没关门 就是在那儿买的 |
| [05:32] | What? | 什么 |
| [05:33] | You told me they went out of business. | 你跟我说他们关门了 |
| [05:35] | No, I didn’t. | 我没说 |
| [05:41] | You know, that seems like something | 感觉这件事 |
| [05:42] | you might’ve dreamed. Yeah. | 很像是你梦到的 |
| [05:45] | Ah, y-you do dream about bakeries a lot. | 你经常梦到饼店 |
| [05:48] | Like you’re trapped, and have to eat your way out? | 梦到被困在里面 必须吃出一条生路吗 |
| [05:51] | I had that one. | 我梦到过 |
| [05:53] | No, no, I’m pretty sure this was real. | 不 我确定这是真事儿 |
| [05:54] | Why would you say it was closed if it wasn’t? | 明明没关 你为什么要说关门了 |
| [05:57] | Eh, I guess I can tell you now. | 好吧 我现在告诉你 |
| [05:59] | It’s just, e-every weekend, you’d make yourself sick | 以前每个周末 你都会吃坏肚子 |
| [06:01] | by eating too many bear claws. | 因为吃了太多熊爪 |
| [06:03] | You’d swear not to do it again, | 你总发誓再也不这样了 |
| [06:05] | but then, the next weekend, you’d be right back on the claw. | 但下个周末 你还是继续吃爪子 |
| [06:09] | But they made me happy when they were in my mouth. | 因为塞在嘴里的感觉很幸福 |
| [06:12] | Well… | 好吧 |
| [06:12] | it was just a little white lie, for your own good. | 只是一句善意的谎言 为了你好 |
| [06:16] | But that’s what you do to the kids. I… | 但这是你带孩子的做法 我… |
| [06:22] | You put me in your lie balloon. | 你把我放进了你的谎言气球 |
| [06:26] | It’s a love bubble. | 是爱的泡泡 |
| [06:28] | And who wouldn’t want to be surrounded by love? | 谁不想被爱包围呢 |
| [06:31] | Okay, just because you put the word “Love” | 就算你在前面加上爱这个字 |
| [06:32] | in front of something doesn’t make it good. | 并不代表这件事就成了好事 |
| [06:35] | “Love murder” is still murder. | “情爱谋杀”还是谋杀 |
| [06:39] | Well, at least “Love bubble” is a fun name. | 不过”爱的泡泡”这名字不错 |
| [06:42] | Marcy does the same thing to me, but she just calls it | 玛茜也会这样对我 但她称之为 |
| [06:44] | “Take it or leave it”” | “爱咋咋地” |
| [06:47] | I had it engraved on the inside of his wedding band. | 我把这句话刻在了他的婚戒里面 |
| [06:50] | Right. I make my own decisions | 好吧 但关于我的生活 |
| [06:52] | about what’s good for me– even if it’s bad for me. | 我要自己做决定 哪怕这决定不好 |
| [06:55] | I’m an American man, that’s what we do. | 我是美国人 我们就这样 |
| [06:59] | Adam, relax. | 亚当 别激动 |
| [07:00] | You guys are diamonds, | 你们是钻石 |
| [07:01] | and we love you. | 我们很喜欢 |
| [07:02] | But what makes a diamond? | 但钻石是怎么做出来的 |
| [07:03] | A chunk of coal under constant pressure. | 是煤炭在持续压力下做成的 |
| [07:08] | I did just fine for 30 years without your help. | 遇到你之前的三十年我也过得挺好啊 |
| [07:10] | – I did. – Oh, please. Without me, | -真的 -少来了 没有我 |
| [07:11] | you’d still be living in that sad apartment where I found you. | 你还住在我找到你的那个破公寓里 |
| [07:14] | Hey, that was my groovy bachelor pad. | 那是我快乐的单身汉公寓 |
| [07:17] | I put up some respectable numbers in there. | 有不少人都睡过我那儿 |
| [07:20] | When I first met Adam, | 我第一次见到亚当的时候 |
| [07:21] | everything he wore had the name of a sports team on it. | 他穿的所有衣服都有球队的名字 |
| [07:24] | His whole wardrobe looked like it got shot out of a T-shirt cannon. | 他整个衣橱就像从T恤大炮里射出来的 |
| [07:28] | That’s not true. | 不是这样的 |
| [07:29] | My– I had that one, it looked like a tuxedo. | 我还有那件 看起来像燕尾服的 |
| [07:32] | Remember? | 记得吗 |
| [07:33] | I wore it to your cousin’s wedding. | 我穿着去参加了你堂姐的婚礼 |
| [07:35] | – Yeah. – Remember? | -好 -记起来了吗 |
| [07:36] | It took me six Christmases | 我花了六年时间 |
| [07:38] | to gently replace every shirt in Adam’s drawer. | 才把他衣柜里的所有上衣慢慢换掉了 |
| [07:41] | Oh, I remember. Every time we’d come to dinner, | 我记得 我们每次来吃饭 |
| [07:43] | I’d smuggle out some of your old T-shirts in my coat. | 都会把你的旧T恤塞进大衣里带走 |
| [07:46] | Was that what it was? | 是这么回事儿吗 |
| [07:48] | I just thought after you ate, your stomach got real big, | 我以为是你吃完之后 胃就变得很大 |
| [07:50] | like a snake. | 跟蛇一样 |
| [07:57] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [08:00] | You told me the washing machine ripped them. | 你跟我说是洗衣机洗坏了 |
| [08:02] | Mm, washing machine, garbage truck, me and my scissors, | 洗衣机 垃圾车 还有我的剪刀 |
| [08:05] | something ripped them. | 说不好是怎么坏的 |
| [08:08] | So, first the bear claws, | 先是熊爪 |
| [08:09] | now the T-shirts; that’s two. | 再是衣服 已经两件了 |
| [08:11] | Is there anything else? | 还有吗 |
| [08:13] | No. | 没了 |
| [08:15] | That’s a yes. | 绝对有 |
| [08:16] | What is it? What are you hiding? | 是什么 你隐瞒了什么 |
| [08:20] | Who wants a bear claw? | 谁想吃熊爪呀 |
| [08:24] | Me, for the last seven years. | 我 想了七年了 |
| [08:29] | I know there’s something big Andi’s keeping from me, | 我知道安迪肯定瞒了我一件大事 |
| [08:31] | ’cause she’s clammed up, like a… a… | 因为她合紧了壳 就像… |
| [08:34] | – Clam? – Yes. | -蛤蜊吗 -对 |
| [08:36] | You’ve got to put a stop to this. | 你必须得阻止这一切 |
| [08:37] | I didn’t, and look at me. | 我没有 然后你看我 |
| [08:39] | I haven’t had a sweater with sleeves on it | 从我结婚那天起 就再没穿过 |
| [08:40] | since my wedding day. | 带袖的毛衣了 |
| [08:43] | Where did my sleeves go? | 我的袖子都去哪儿了 |
| [08:44] | I don’t know, my wife won’t tell me. | 我不知道 我老婆不告诉我 |
| [08:46] | Look, I am gonna figure out what she’s been hiding, | 我要查清楚她到底在隐瞒什么 |
| [08:48] | because there is no love bubble big enough to contain Adam Burns. | 因为没有什么爱的泡泡能装下亚当·伯恩斯 |
| [08:53] | You’re doing God’s work, brother. | 天将降大任于你也 兄弟 |
| [08:55] | Okay, so think. | 你好好想想 |
| [08:56] | What are some big things that you’ve wanted | 你有没有想要过什么大件的东西 |
| [08:58] | that Andi has said no to? | 而安迪拒绝了 |
| [08:59] | Well, uh, I’ve always wanted a grill for the patio, | 我一直想在阳台上装一个烤架 |
| [09:02] | but Andi said it wouldn’t fit. | 但安迪说放不下 |
| [09:05] | I bet that’s it. | 肯定是这个 |
| [09:05] | Women are anti-grill. | 女人们很讨厌烤架 |
| [09:07] | They don’t like anything we can do while we’re drinking beer. | 她们不喜欢任何我们喝酒时做的事 |
| [09:10] | No, no, I measured the patio; she’s right. | 不 我量过阳台尺寸 她说得对 |
| [09:13] | Oh, she’s good. She’s peppering the lies with truth | 她很聪明 她会在谎言里加点实话 |
| [09:15] | to create maximum confusion. | 从而创造最大化的困惑 |
| [09:18] | Okay, so what else? | 好的 还有什么 |
| [09:20] | Well, who knows what she’s hiding? | 谁知道她瞒了什么 |
| [09:22] | We’ve been married 17 years. | 我们结婚十七年了 |
| [09:23] | We both hide lots of stuff. | 谁都藏了不少东西 |
| [09:25] | I got a hollowed out book just for M&M’s. | 我有本中空的书 专装巧克力豆的 |
| [09:31] | Stay focused. | 专心点 |
| [09:33] | You’re doing work for all men, here. | 你现在在为所有男人谋福利呢 |
| [09:34] | You need to crawl up out of the swamp, | 你得爬出沼泽 |
| [09:35] | and tell us what fresh air smells like. | 告诉我们新鲜空气是什么味儿的 |
| [09:38] | Okay, uh, well, she knows I’ve always wanted a recliner, | 好的 她知道我一直很喜欢活动躺椅 |
| [09:41] | but obviously, I can’t have one of those, | 但显然 我不能买来放在家里 |
| [09:43] | because over half of childhood broken bones | 因为半数以上的儿童骨折 |
| [09:45] | come from recliners. Ha. | 都是活动躺椅造成的 |
| [09:51] | Maybe I should remeasure the patio. | 也许我应该重新量一下露台 |
| [09:54] | Back up. What was that thing about recliners? | 等一下 再说一遍活动躺椅怎么回事 |
| [09:57] | Yeah, that’s what Andi told me. | 好 安迪告诉我的 |
| [09:59] | She saw it on the news. | 她在新闻上看到的 |
| [10:00] | It’s true, over half of all… | 是真的 超过半数以上的 |
| [10:03] | What? No, no, really. Seriously. | 什么 不不 真的 |
| [10:05] | If you– when you pull the lever, | 当你拉控制杆的时候 |
| [10:06] | your arm could get caught… | 你的胳膊可能会被卡住 |
| [10:07] | Nope. | 不会 |
| [10:10] | But don’t those things shoot kids right across the… | 难道那些东西把孩子弹飞到街对面… |
| [10:11] | It’s not a rocket, it’s a chair. | 又不是火箭 只是张椅子 |
| [10:16] | I can’t believe this. | 我不敢相信 |
| [10:17] | Why would she lie about a chair? | 她为什么要为了椅子撒谎 |
| [10:19] | Why wouldn’t she lie about a chair? | 她为什么不为了椅子撒谎 |
| [10:21] | That’s what you need to be asking yourself. | 这才是你应该问自己的 |
| [10:26] | So it’s the recliner? | 所以活动躺椅 |
| [10:27] | She has been keeping me needlessly upright for years. | 她害我毫无缘故地挺直了好几年腰板 |
| [10:32] | Men came down from the trees. | 男人从树上爬下来 |
| [10:33] | We started walking and then we started reclining. | 开始走路 然后开始躺在活动躺椅上 |
| [10:35] | Andi’s messing with evolution. | 安迪在破坏进化进程 |
| [10:39] | What are you gonna do? | 你要怎么做 |
| [10:40] | I don’t know, but I need one of those chairs, | 我不知道 但我需要那种椅子 |
| [10:42] | because if I’m like this, I’m uncomfortable. | 因为我这样待着 我不舒服 |
| [10:45] | If I’m like this, I’m asleep. | 而我这样待着 会睡着 |
| [10:48] | This is where I need to be. | 这才是我应该待的方式 |
| [10:50] | This is the sweet spot. | 这样我才爽 |
| [11:01] | Hello, darling. | 好啊 亲爱的 |
| [11:15] | Yup. | 对 |
| [11:17] | I’m in the sweet spot. | 我正爽着呢 |
| [11:23] | I didn’t think you’d figure it out. | 没想到你会想明白 |
| [11:26] | You give me 17 years, I can figure anything out. | 你给我十七年 我什么都能想明白 |
| [11:34] | So, recliners cause over | 所以 活动躺椅是 |
| [11:37] | half of childhood broken bones, huh? | 半数以上儿童骨折的原因 |
| [11:41] | Okay, I may have rounded it up. | 好的 也许那是我估算出来的 |
| [11:43] | Or made it up. | 或者编出来的 |
| [11:47] | The point is it was up and when things are up, they’re good. | 重点是 它是直的 直立的东西 才是好的 |
| [11:50] | That’s the rule of up. | 这就是直立的规则 |
| [11:55] | Look, okay. | 听着 |
| [11:56] | Let me give you a real statistic. | 我跟你说个真实的统计数据 |
| [11:58] | This is where I’m gonna be spending over half of my time, | 这里 就是我半生会待的地方 |
| [12:03] | eating over half of my meals | 我一半的饭 都会在这吃 |
| [12:07] | and believing less than half of what you say. | 并且质疑你说的半数以下的话 |
| [12:11] | Let’s not make a big deal out of this. | 别这么小题大做 |
| [12:12] | Oh, I’m gonna. | 我就要 |
| [12:19] | I’ve never been on the not-lying side of a lie before. | 我从来不会撒谎说我不撒谎 |
| [12:21] | I am gonna enjoy this. | 我要享受享受 |
| [12:24] | I guess you deserve that. | 也许你值得享受 |
| [12:25] | Oh, I do. Yeah. | 当然了 |
| [12:27] | Because you know what I was thinking, | 你知道我在想什么吗 |
| [12:29] | sitting in the warm embrace of my Pittsburgh spirit chair? | 当我在匹兹堡精神的温暖怀抱椅子中时 |
| [12:32] | And, yes, that’s what we’re calling it. | 没错 这就是它的名字了 |
| [12:36] | Why would you lie about a recliner? | 你为什么要为一个活动躺椅撒谎 |
| [12:37] | How is that part of the protective love bubble? | 这个部分和爱的保护泡泡有什么关系 |
| [12:42] | Well, I was protecting you | 我是在保护你 |
| [12:46] | from bringing that ugly chair into my living room. | 不要让你把那张丑椅子搬进我的客厅 |
| [12:50] | So this was for you, not me. | 所以这是为了你 不是为了我 |
| [12:52] | Yes. You caught me. | 对 你抓到我了 |
| [12:54] | I caught you. | 我抓到你了 |
| [12:57] | Yeah, I just said that. | 我刚刚说过了 |
| [12:59] | I know. I had it in the chamber. | 我知道 我都准备好了 |
| [13:00] | I was gonna say it no matter what. | 无论怎样都得说出来 |
| [13:03] | Honey, the love bubble started out innocently. | 亲爱的 爱的泡泡的初衷是好的 |
| [13:07] | Right? I-I’d tell the kids not to do something | 知道吗 我让孩子们不要去做一件事时 |
| [13:09] | and then they keep asking, “Why? Why? Why?” | 他们会一直问 为什么 为什么 为什么 |
| [13:12] | It was just easier to tell a little fib. | 这时候撒个小谎更方便 |
| [13:15] | But-but then I used it on you | 但后来我用到了你身上 |
| [13:17] | and-and-and my love bubble became a… | 然后我的爱的泡泡变成了 |
| [13:20] | Lie balloon. | 谎言气球 |
| [13:23] | Just like I said. Ah-ha again. | 就像我刚刚说的 啊哈 再次嘲讽 |
| [13:27] | And you were right and I’m really sorry. | 你说得对 我很抱歉 |
| [13:30] | What? | 什么 |
| [13:33] | You were right and I’m sorry. | 你说得对 我很抱歉 |
| [13:41] | Okay, I don’t know what to say | 好吧 我不知道要说什么了 |
| [13:41] | because I never thought this would happen. | 因为我从来没想过会发生这种事情 |
| [13:46] | Well, it’s happening. | 它发生了 |
| [13:48] | I don’t buy it. You’re up to something. | 我不信 你肯定有阴谋 |
| [13:51] | What, do you think I’m lying? | 怎么 你以为我在撒谎吗 |
| [13:52] | After a multiyear recliner conspiracy, | 经历了多年的活动躺椅阴谋以后 |
| [13:54] | I tend to be a little skeptical. | 我变得有些多疑 |
| [14:00] | I got my eye on you. | 我看着你呢 |
| [14:07] | Ah, damn. I should’ve sprung for the swiveler. | 该死 我该买张带转圈的 |
| [14:12] | – Andi said she was sorry? – Yup. | -安迪说了对不起 -对 |
| [14:14] | Like she’s sorry she married you? | 她很对不起自己 因为嫁给了你 |
| [14:17] | No, no, but something’s… something’s definitely fishy. | 不是 但有一些事情 非常可疑 |
| [14:21] | She said I was right. | 她说我说得对 |
| [14:24] | That’s not the woman I married. | 我娶的媳妇儿不是这样的 |
| [14:27] | I bet she’s buying time to regroup. | 她肯定是赢取时间重新部署 |
| [14:30] | Has she done anything else suspicious? | 她还做什么可疑的事了吗 |
| [14:32] | Yeah. Yeah, she said she felt so bad that her and Marcy | 有 她说她很不安 所以要跟玛茜 |
| [14:36] | went all the way across town to Tony’s | 跑到城市另一头的托尼餐厅 |
| [14:38] | to get my favorite pizza for dinner. | 给我买我最喜欢的披萨当晚餐 |
| [14:40] | That’s a diversion. | 这是转移注意力的 |
| [14:41] | There’s definitely gonna be a counterattack. | 肯定是在准备反击了 |
| [14:45] | Although I do hope she got breadsticks. | 不过我很希望她们能买面包棒回来 |
| [14:48] | It’s gonna take more than great pizza to fool me. | 要骗我 好吃的披萨还不够 |
| [14:50] | That’s right. But all bets are off if she got the breadsticks. | 没有错 但她们要是买了面包棒回来就算了 |
| [14:52] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [14:56] | O-Okay. Uh, can you hold on just for one second? | 好的 你可以等一下吗 |
| [15:01] | The principal from Emme’s school is on the phone. | 艾米的校长打电话来了 |
| [15:03] | Emme’s been kissing boys. | 艾米一直在亲男生 |
| [15:05] | What? I don’t want my baby doing that. | 什么 我不希望我的宝贝做这种事 |
| [15:08] | Yeah, well, apparently, she’s been looking for her Prince Charming, | 显然 她一直在找她的白马王子 |
| [15:10] | thanks to your little princess kick. | 多谢你造的公主梦 |
| [15:15] | You’re good. | 你真厉害 |
| [15:18] | I see what’s happening here. | 我懂这是怎么回事了 |
| [15:20] | I thought you’d come after the recliner, | 我以为你会朝活动躺椅开火 |
| [15:23] | but you’re doing an end run all the way back to princesses. | 但你绕了个大圈 回到公主身上 |
| [15:29] | What? | 什么 |
| [15:30] | Got to admire the technique. | 不得不敬佩这技术 |
| [15:32] | Yeah. So what’s your game, huh? | 你的战术是什么 |
| [15:33] | I’m supposed to feel so bad about Emme | 让我因为艾米内疚到不行 |
| [15:36] | that I give up my recliner? | 于是放弃我的活动躺椅 |
| [15:38] | Is that it? Is that it? | 对吗 对吗 |
| [15:39] | Adam, I have a job and three children. | 亚当 我有一份工作 还有三个孩子 |
| [15:41] | I don’t have time to be a criminal mastermind. Okay? | 没时间跟你演犯罪大师 好吗 |
| [15:45] | I’m-I’m telling you that Emme’s principal is on the phone. | 我跟你说了 艾米的校长打电话来了 |
| [15:48] | Oh, sure. The old fake phone call. | 当然了 古老的假电话 |
| [15:51] | Yeah, well, the kid is one step ahead of you this time, huh? | 这次笨小子比你快一步了 |
| [15:54] | What do you think, Don? | 你说呢 大唐 |
| [15:56] | It’s the sauce. That’s the secret. | 这个酱料 才是秘诀 |
| [16:02] | It’s Marcy on the phone, isn’t it? | 电话那头是玛茜吧 对吗 |
| [16:03] | Where’s she hiding? | 她藏在哪了 |
| [16:04] | Upstairs? In the pantry? | 楼上吗 还是储物室 |
| [16:07] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [16:09] | Yeah. This is Adam Burns. | 对 我就是亚当·伯恩斯 |
| [16:10] | Let me tell you something. | 让我告诉你 |
| [16:11] | My daughter can kiss whoever she wants. | 我女儿爱亲谁就能亲谁 |
| [16:14] | In fact, maybe I’ll come down there | 事实上 也许我会过去 |
| [16:15] | and give you a big kiss, too, Principal Marcy. | 也给你一个大么么 玛茜校长 |
| [16:20] | Who’s he talking to? | 他在跟谁说话 |
| [16:26] | It’s for you. | 找你的 |
| [16:28] | Nope. | 不 |
| [16:33] | Hi. | 你好 |
| [16:38] | We’ll be there first thing in the morning. | 我们明天一早就过去 |
| [16:42] | Yes, ma’am, I do need to work on my attitude. | 好的 夫人 我一定会改正我的态度 |
| [16:49] | You want to tell me what just happened here? | 你要不要解释下 刚刚怎么回事 |
| [16:52] | It’s funny because I thought | 很有意思 我以为 |
| [16:56] | you were doing something, | 你是有安排的 |
| [16:57] | but you were actually just being honest. | 可实际你说的是实话 |
| [17:01] | I hide M&M’s in a book. | 我把巧克力豆藏在书里了 |
| [17:06] | I guess we got ourselves worked up for nothing out there, huh? | 看来我们的辛苦都白费了啊 |
| [17:11] | Ah, what are you gonna do, right? | 你还能怎么办 对吧 |
| [17:16] | Although, after your behavior on the phone, | 不过领教了你在电话里的行为以后 |
| [17:18] | I shouldn’t be too surprised about your daughter. | 你女儿会这样 我也不意外了 |
| [17:20] | And I’ll tell you something else. | 我再跟你说点别的 |
| [17:22] | Kissing boys is a perfect example | 亲男生 就是一个完美的例子 |
| [17:23] | of why we discourage these ridiculous princess obsessions. | 说明了我们为什么不鼓励这些荒谬的公主情结 |
| [17:30] | Stop looking at me. | 别再看我了 |
| [17:30] | You’re making my ear hot. | 把我耳朵都看红了 |
| [17:36] | All right, listen. | 好的 听着 |
| [17:37] | We need to go in together and talk to Emme | 我们要一起去跟艾米谈谈 |
| [17:39] | about this boy-kissing business. Okay? | 关于这件亲男生的问题 好吗 |
| [17:41] | Now, I know we both made some mistakes. | 我知道我们都犯过错 |
| [17:42] | Well, I made a mistake and then you made a much bigger mistake. | 我犯过错 你犯的是大错 |
| [17:47] | The important thing is | 重点是 |
| [17:49] | that when we talk to Emme we do it bubble-free. No lies. | 我们在跟艾米谈的时候 不许有泡泡 不许撒谎 |
| [17:52] | Agreed. But it’s a shame, you know? | 同意 但有些可惜了 你懂吗 |
| [17:54] | I mean, the bubble and I had a good run. | 我跟泡泡一路走来相当默契 |
| [17:59] | well, I should tell you that guys in tank tops | 我应该告诉你 穿工字背心 |
| [18:02] | don’t really get more speeding tickets. | 并不会让男人收到更多超速罚单 |
| [18:05] | I knew it. | 我就知道 |
| [18:07] | Summer can’t come fast enough. | 该死的夏天还不来 |
| [18:11] | Hey, sweetie. | 亲爱的 |
| [18:12] | Hey, Emme. | 艾米 |
| [18:16] | we talked to your principal today and… | 今天我们跟你的校长谈过了 |
| [18:20] | it’s not okay to kiss boys. | 亲男生是不对的 |
| [18:22] | But I was just looking for my prince. | 可我只是在找我的王子 |
| [18:24] | I know, honey. | 我知道 宝贝 |
| [18:26] | But those princess stories, | 可那些公主故事 |
| [18:27] | they’re-they’re just made-up. | 都是编造出来的 |
| [18:28] | You can’t act like that in real life. | 你不能在现实生活里做那种事 |
| [18:31] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [18:35] | Because little girls are strong, too, | 因为小姑娘也很强大 |
| [18:37] | and it’s better if they stand on their own. | 她们靠自己才更好 |
| [18:40] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [18:44] | Because it’s a big world out there, okay? | 因为这世界很大 |
| [18:47] | And the only thing that you can really depend on | 你唯一可以真正依靠的 |
| [18:50] | is your own self-respect. | 是你的自尊 |
| [18:53] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [18:57] | Because Snow White called | 因为白雪公主打电话来 |
| [18:59] | and said you were being too cute in your dress | 说你穿这条裙子太可爱了 |
| [19:01] | and made her look bad. | 显得她丑了 |
| [19:03] | That makes sense. | 有道理 |
| [19:08] | Welcome back to the bubble. | 欢迎回到泡泡世界 |
| [19:17] | How about this? | 这样如何 |
| [19:18] | You get rid of the chair | 你把椅子搬走 |
| [19:19] | and I’ll talk to Teddy about using deodorant. | 我跟泰迪谈 让他用除臭剂 |
| [19:23] | Doesn’t bother me. | 我不在乎 |
| [19:24] | His smell is just my smell on a little kid. | 他身上的味道跟我小时候一模一样 |
| [19:27] | Okay, how about this? | 好的 那这样呢 |
| [19:29] | You and I can have sex, lots of sex. | 你和我可以做爱做的事 做非常多次 |
| [19:34] | Already having it. You like it as much as me. | 已经有了 你跟我一样喜欢 |
| [19:35] | Try again. | 再试试 |
| [19:38] | I got it. | 我有了 |
| [19:39] | You get rid of the chair, I’ll move the furniture off the patio | 你把椅子搬走 我把露台的家具搬走 |
| [19:42] | and you can put in a big built-in grill. | 你可以建一个大烤架 |
| [19:51] | Deal. | 成交 |
| [19:53] | So, uh, what are you gonna do with the chair? | 你准备怎么处理椅子 |
| [19:56] | Well, I’ll just | 我只能 |
| [19:57] | put it out on the curb and hope it finds a good home. | 把它放在路边 希望它能有个好归宿 |
| [20:00] | What kind of nitwit would take that? | 哪个傻子会要它啊 |
| [20:06] | There’s the sweet spot. | 我爽到了 |
| [20:11] | No. | 不行 |
| [20:13] | Okay, I’ll give up the recliner if you agree… | 好的 我可以放弃活动躺椅 如果你同意 |
| [20:14] | Honey, it’s me or the chair. | 亲爱的 要我还是要椅子 |
| [20:17] | I’m gonna miss you, baby. | 我会想你的 宝贝 |
| [20:19] | Don. | 大唐 |
| [20:20] | I was talking to the chair. | 我在跟椅子说话 |
| [20:24] | I wasn’t talking to you. | 我说的才不是你 |