| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | ♪ The night is right ♪ | 长夜漫漫 |
| [00:04] | ♪ For making love ♪ | 无心睡眠 |
| [00:08] | ♪ To you. ♪ | 你也睡不着 |
| [00:11] | Old Spice, my secret weapon. | 老香料 我的秘密武器 |
| [00:18] | She’s a lucky lady. | 她可真有福气 |
| [00:20] | Andi, prepare yourself for some good old-fashioned… | 安迪 做好准备迎接老式的 |
| [00:25] | Teddy. | 泰迪 |
| [00:28] | Surprise, he’s in our bed again. | 惊喜吧 他又跑我们的床上来了 |
| [00:31] | I see that and I love it. | 我看到了 好喜欢啊 |
| [00:34] | But, uh… | 但是 |
| [00:36] | buddy, you’ve been sleeping in here for two weeks. | 宝贝 你已经在这睡两周了 |
| [00:38] | Made your own little dent in the mattress. | 回去祸害自己的床垫去 |
| [00:41] | Well, he can’t sleep on his own | 他自己不敢睡 |
| [00:43] | because somebody let him watch Nightmare on Elm Street. | 因为某人让他看了猛鬼街 |
| [00:48] | Okay, look, I know we talked about this, | 听着 虽然我们谈过这件事 |
| [00:49] | but I am still not convinced | 但我还是不相信 |
| [00:50] | that’s why he can’t sleep by himself. | 他是因为这个不敢自己睡的 |
| [00:54] | What else could have happened two weeks ago | 两周之前还有什么事 |
| [00:56] | to scare the bejesus out of Teddy? | 会把泰迪的魂都吓没了 |
| [00:59] | I switched to two percent milk, that’s pretty spooky. | 我把牛奶换成百分之二脂肪的了 太吓人了 |
| [01:04] | – No, it was the movie. – Okay. | -不是 就是因为电影 -好吧 |
| [01:06] | Honey, don’t worry about it. | 亲爱的 没事 |
| [01:07] | Go get your pillow. | 去把枕头拿来 |
| [01:11] | I estimate we have 30 seconds, okay? | 估计我们有30秒 对吧 |
| [01:14] | Unless he brushes his teeth. | 除非他刷牙 |
| [01:16] | Ted-Teddy! | 泰迪 |
| [01:17] | Brush your teeth! | 必须刷牙 |
| [01:19] | Okay, we have 35 seconds. | 好了 我们有35秒 |
| [01:20] | It’s not a race. | 这又不是赛跑 |
| [01:22] | Well, it can be. It’s been two weeks! | 可以是 都两周了 |
| [01:24] | Okay, listen. | 够了 听着 |
| [01:26] | No, no, no, listen, listen. | 不行 听着 |
| [01:28] | I said he was too young for that movie | 我早说过他还太小 不能看哪种电影 |
| [01:29] | but you went rogue. Yeah. | 结果你自作主张去了 |
| [01:33] | You made your bed and now | 是你自己铺的床 |
| [01:35] | we all get to lie in it. | 我们只能都睡在里面了 |
| [01:37] | With Teddy. | 加上泰迪 |
| [01:39] | Wait, wait, wait, we still have ten seconds. | 等等 我们还有10秒 |
| [01:42] | We can make this happen. | 我们可以成功的 |
| [01:43] | If you follow my instructions very carefully… | 只要你仔细按我的指挥来 |
| [01:49] | What a waste of Old Spice. | 真是浪费老香料了 |
| [02:00] | What is wrong with this… bag? | 这个袋子有什么问题 |
| [02:03] | Why won’t it open? | 它怎么打不开呢 |
| [02:06] | Why don’t bags open anymore? | 为什么现在的袋子都打不开了 |
| [02:09] | This bag is broken. | 这个袋子坏了 |
| [02:12] | Adam. | 亚当 |
| [02:17] | You seem troubled. | 你有什么烦心事吗 |
| [02:19] | I’m fine, it’s… it’s private. | 我没事 是隐私问题 |
| [02:22] | Yeah, stay out of the man’s business. | 对 别管他的事 |
| [02:25] | He hasn’t made love to his wife in 15 days. | 他已经15天没和老婆上床了 |
| [02:28] | That’s not true. How do you know that? | 才不是呢 你怎么知道的 |
| [02:31] | Marcy told me. | 玛茜告诉我的 |
| [02:32] | After we made love. | 在我们上床以后 |
| [02:37] | We have a heck of a streak going. | 身上可是爱痕满满 |
| [02:40] | And I’ll tell you, the sky looks a little bluer. | 这么和你说吧 感觉天空都更蓝了 |
| [02:44] | Well, since it’s public information… | 既然大家都知道了 |
| [02:47] | I let Teddy watch a scary movie | 我让泰迪看了一部恐怖电影 |
| [02:49] | and he’s been in our bed ever since. | 从此以后 就一直睡在我们床上 |
| [02:51] | Now I’m starring in my own horror movie and it’s rated G. | 现在我困在自己的恐怖电影里了 全家观赏级的 |
| [02:56] | I haven’t had intimate relations | 自从珍和我分开以后 |
| [02:58] | since Jen and I split up. | 我就没有亲密关系了 |
| [02:59] | But I’m not complaining, I have new interests. | 我不是抱怨 我有新爱好了 |
| [03:01] | I’m learning Mandarin. | 在学普通话 |
| [03:04] | That means, “I’m lonely.” | 意思是 我好孤单 |
| [03:09] | Let’s just keep our bedroom problems to ourselves, okay? | 我们床上的问题还是各自解决各自的吧 |
| [03:13] | I don’t need anyone else knowing my private business. | 我不需要别人知道我的隐私问题 |
| [03:16] | Your mother tells me you’re in a slump, son. | 你妈说你干涸了 儿子 |
| [03:22] | Mom knows? | 连妈都知道了 |
| [03:23] | Well, my guess is you’re overthinking things. | 我觉得是你自己想多了 |
| [03:25] | Just relax, boy. | 放轻松 儿子 |
| [03:26] | See the ball, hit the ball. | 盯准目标 勇往上前 |
| [03:30] | It’s not a slump. It’s a drought. | 不是干涸 是干旱了 |
| [03:32] | My swing is just fine. | 我的击球没问题 |
| [03:35] | You say “Tomato,” I say you’re not getting any. | 你要这么说 我也没什么办法了 |
| [03:41] | Look, the problem’s not me and Andi. | 问题不是我 安迪 |
| [03:44] | It’s all the little people that live with us. | 还有那些个跟我们一起住的小人儿 |
| [03:48] | One of life’s cruel jokes: | 生活中残酷的笑话之一 |
| [03:49] | the more kids you have, the less time there is | 你的孩子越多 造孩子的机会 |
| [03:51] | to do the thing that makes kids. | 就越少 |
| [03:54] | Well, you know what you should do? | 你该这么做 |
| [03:56] | Take Andi to a hotel. | 带安迪去个酒店 |
| [03:58] | No kids, a little romance. | 没有孩子 还很浪漫 |
| [04:00] | That’s actually a great idea. | 这还真是个好主意 |
| [04:01] | Andi loves hotels. | 安迪喜欢酒店 |
| [04:03] | It reminds her of our honeymoon, | 会让她想起我们的蜜月 |
| [04:04] | when she was already in a good mood, | 那时候她的心情可好了 |
| [04:05] | ’cause she got me. | 因为我是她的了 |
| [04:07] | – Hey, Dad, can you watch the kids? -Sure. | -爸 你能看孩子吗 -当然 |
| [04:09] | I love having my little beer grabbers around. | 我喜欢和跑腿拿啤酒的小家伙们在一起 |
| [04:15] | How come you never ask me or Marcy to watch the kids? | 你为什么从来不让我和玛茜看孩子 |
| [04:18] | Where are your keys right now? | 你的钥匙现在在哪 |
| [04:21] | That’s why. | 这就是原因 |
| [04:24] | Come on, I’m serious. | 拜托 我是认真的 |
| [04:25] | You never even consider us. | 你从来都没考虑过我们 |
| [04:26] | I love those kids. | 我爱这些孩子 |
| [04:28] | Well, that’s nice to hear, Don. | 这话说得真好 大唐 |
| [04:31] | And since Dad just called them “Little beer grabbers,” | 既然爸叫他们跑腿拿啤酒的 |
| [04:33] | I guess you win. | 看来你赢了 |
| [04:36] | That’s all right. | 没关系 |
| [04:37] | I still have your mother, the original beer grabber. | 我还有你们的妈妈 跑腿拿啤酒的初代 |
| [04:42] | How would you like to be whisked… away | 你愿不愿意被你亲爱的老公 |
| [04:47] | by your loving husband to a hotel room | 迅速转移到一个酒店房间里 |
| [04:49] | complete with… A loving husband? | 里面还有着一个亲爱的老公 |
| [04:54] | You’re so sweet. Hmm? Yeah. | 你真贴心 |
| [04:56] | – But we can’t. – What? Why? | -但不行 -什么 为什么 |
| [04:59] | Well, hotels cost money. | 去酒店要花钱的 |
| [05:01] | Until we sell that flip house, | 在我们把翻新房卖掉之前 |
| [05:02] | we are carrying two mortgages. | 我们的抵押贷款太多了 |
| [05:04] | I already thought of that. | 我已经考虑到了 |
| [05:05] | I have a gift card. | 我有张礼品卡 |
| [05:09] | Don’t worry, baby. | 别担心 宝贝 |
| [05:10] | I won’t spend a dime on you. | 我一分钱都不会花在你身上的 |
| [05:15] | Wait, this is the hotel that gave us a free night | 这是那间有床虱 然后赠送我们免费住一夜的 |
| [05:17] | ’cause they had bedbugs. | 那间酒店 |
| [05:21] | You saw one, | 你看到虫子以后 |
| [05:21] | and freaked out and the next thing I knew, | 吓坏了 下一幕就是 |
| [05:23] | you were in the glass elevator naked, | 你躶体站在透明电梯里 |
| [05:24] | riding down to the lobby. | 下楼跑去大堂 |
| [05:27] | I had my underwear. | 我有内裤 |
| [05:31] | In your hand. | 手里拿着的 |
| [05:33] | And I apologized to that wedding. | 也和婚礼现场的人道歉了 |
| [05:37] | But the hotel just reopened, | 但酒店已经重新开业了 |
| [05:38] | so it’ll never be cleaner. | 肯定特别干净 |
| [05:39] | Just like when a restaurant reopens | 就像因为老鼠问题整改 |
| [05:41] | after a rat problem– ooh. | 重新开业的餐厅一样 |
| [05:42] | By the way, I have a gift card for dinner, too. | 对了 我还有晚餐的礼品卡 |
| [05:56] | So, your dad and I have to go away for a night. | 我和你爸今晚要出去一晚 |
| [05:58] | Oh, what for? | 干什么去 |
| [06:00] | We got to take care of a little business. | 我们去办些事 |
| [06:04] | What kind of business? | 什么样的事 |
| [06:05] | None of your business business. | 不关你的事 |
| [06:07] | So, you, Teddy and Emme are gonna be staying | 今晚你 泰迪和艾米要和 |
| [06:09] | with Uncle Don and Aunt Marcy. | 唐伯伯和玛茜婶婶待在一起 |
| [06:11] | Or… | 或者 |
| [06:13] | I think I’m old enough now | 我觉得我已经够大了 |
| [06:14] | to stay home by myself for one night. | 可以自己在家待一夜了 |
| [06:17] | What do you say? | 你觉得呢 |
| [06:18] | – Okay. – No. | -好 -不行 |
| [06:21] | Pantry. | 储物间 |
| [06:24] | Okay. | 听着 |
| [06:26] | We are not leaving Katie here by herself; | 我们不能留凯蒂一个人在家 |
| [06:28] | she can’t be trusted. | 不能相信她 |
| [06:29] | She’s got our DNA. | 她可是我们俩的孩子 |
| [06:31] | Our beer-chugging, mechanical bull-riding DNA. | 流着咣咣灌啤酒 跑去骑野牛的血液 |
| [06:35] | She gets good grades, she’s responsible, | 她成绩优秀 有责任感 |
| [06:38] | she’s a good girl. | 是个好姑娘 |
| [06:40] | We had a golden retriever growing up that was a good girl. | 我们家有只金毛 刚长大的时候也是个好姑娘 |
| [06:42] | You know what she did every time we left her alone? | 你知道我们出门 她自己在家的时候都做什么吗 |
| [06:44] | Jumped the fence and got pregnant. | 跳出栅栏 然后怀孕了 |
| [06:46] | She’s having a tough time at school, all right? | 她现在在学校的生活很辛苦的 |
| [06:49] | Her best friend moved away. | 她最好的朋友搬家了 |
| [06:50] | She hasn’t found a new social circle yet. | 她还没找到新的社交团体 |
| [06:52] | Look, she wants this; | 她想这样 |
| [06:53] | let’s just do something nice for her. | 我们就给她点好东西 |
| [06:55] | We give her food and clothes every single day. | 我们每天都给她食物和衣服 |
| [07:00] | All right, let me ask you this: | 好吧 我问问你 |
| [07:02] | what do you want more? | 你更想要哪一样 |
| [07:03] | To win this Kate thing, or hotel sex? | 凯蒂这件事的胜利 还是去酒店上床 |
| [07:06] | I vote for hotel sex. I’m a single-issue voter, okay? | 我投酒店上床 我是单一问题投票者 好吧 |
| [07:10] | Katie, great news. | 凯蒂 好消息 |
| [07:14] | Okay, so Teddy and Emme are at Uncle Don’s… | 好的 泰迪和艾米去唐伯伯家 |
| [07:15] | Okay, everyone knows where everyone is. | 大家知道彼此的位置 |
| [07:17] | Blow some kisses. No time to waste. | 别吻别了 没时间浪费了 |
| [07:21] | Would it be okay if I invited Shelby and Winslow over? | 我邀请谢尔比和温思洛来家里行吗 |
| [07:24] | The two old guys from The Muppets? | 《布偶大电影》里面那两个老人 |
| [07:28] | No. They’re girls from my Spanish class. | 不是 是我西班牙语课的女同学 |
| [07:30] | But I’m thinking I might get to know them better | 我和她们多相处 |
| [07:32] | if we hang out. | 可以更了解她们 |
| [07:35] | You-you can hang out tomorrow, okay? | 你可以明天跟她们相处 |
| [07:37] | Nobody but you here tonight. | 今晚家里只能有你一个人 |
| [07:39] | You invite someone over, they invite more people. | 你邀请几个人 她们再邀请几个人 |
| [07:40] | Next thing you know, I got Burning Man in my living room. | 接下来 我家客厅就变成狂欢节现场了 |
| [07:44] | You in the house, just you. | 你在家 只有你 |
| [07:46] | Sitting around, doing nothing. | 坐着 什么都别做 |
| [07:48] | Have fun. I love you. | 开心点 我爱你 |
| [07:53] | Honey, | 亲爱的 |
| [07:53] | just between you and me, | 这话就我们俩知道 |
| [07:55] | go ahead and have those girls over. | 去邀请那些姑娘来 |
| [07:57] | – But Dad just said… – Don’t worry about Dad. | -可老爸说 -别担心老爸 |
| [07:59] | He’s got other things on his mind. | 他没空管别的事 |
| [08:03] | Come on. | 快走 |
| [08:04] | Would you please come on? I’ve got ideas. Okay. | 你能不能快点 我有很多想法 |
| [08:19] | Howdy, cowboy. | 好啊 牛仔 |
| [08:21] | Ooh, Old West prostitute. I like it. | 西部妓女 我喜欢 |
| [08:24] | No, no, I’m a pioneer woman. | 不 我是拓荒的女人 |
| [08:26] | Yeah, farming the land to feed our 12 children. | 没错 耕地还要喂饱我们12个孩子 |
| [08:30] | Let’s just be ourselves. | 我们还是做自己吧 |
| [08:32] | It’s been 15 days. It’ll seem new. | 已经15天了 肯定有新鲜感 |
| [08:34] | Later, we should raid those minibar snacks. | 等会我们去清空小冰箱里的零食 |
| [08:36] | They’re complimentary. | 是赠送的 |
| [08:37] | Well, if we do this thing right, | 事情顺利的话 |
| [08:39] | you won’t be awake for minibar snacks. | 你没力气去吃小冰箱的零食了 |
| [08:51] | What is it? | 怎么了 |
| [08:53] | I started thinking about those bedbugs. | 我开始想到那些床虱了 |
| [08:56] | I think this might be the same room | 这间好像是我们上次 |
| [08:58] | that we had last time. | 住的那个房间 |
| [08:59] | It’s got the same floor plan: bed, window, TV. | 一样的平面图 床 窗户和电视 |
| [09:03] | It’s a hotel room. They all have that floor plan. | 这是酒店房间 平面图都是一样的 |
| [09:06] | Right. Right. | 对 没错 |
| [09:11] | It-It’s like I can feel bugs on me. | 我仿佛能感觉到那些虫子在我身上 |
| [09:16] | Those things drink blood. | 那些东西吸血的 |
| [09:18] | And what if one of ’em bites me there? | 万一有一只咬到那里呢 |
| [09:20] | That’s where all the blood will be. | 到时候血液肯定都在那里 |
| [09:24] | Everything’s gonna be fine. All right? | 不会有事的 好吗 |
| [09:26] | Now, mosey on over here, partner. | 快点过来吧 我的伴侣 |
| [09:31] | Come on. | 快来 |
| [09:36] | I-I can’t do it, I’m sorry. | 我做不到 对不起 |
| [09:40] | Hey, Teddy is at Don and Marcy’s. | 泰迪在大唐和玛茜家 |
| [09:42] | That means our bed is empty. | 也就是说主卧的床是空的 |
| [09:44] | Le-Let’s just go home. | 咱们直接回家吧 |
| [09:46] | You want to go home? | 你想回家去吗 |
| [09:47] | I’ll make it just like a hotel, okay. | 我会把家里变成酒店的 |
| [09:49] | I’ll put chocolates on the pillow, | 我在枕头上放点巧克力 |
| [09:50] | and in the morning, we can steal our own shampoo. | 早上的时候 我们可以偷拿自己的洗发水 |
| [09:54] | Okay, yeah, that– | 好 可以 |
| [09:56] | Let me just text Kate and warn her– tell her | 我给凯特发个短信提醒她 不 告诉她 |
| [09:58] | that we’re coming home. | 我们要回家了 |
| [09:59] | Good, good, great. I am out of here. | 好 我这就出去了 |
| [10:01] | Adam. | 亚当 |
| [10:02] | Glass elevator. | 玻璃电梯 |
| [10:05] | Right. Pants. | 好 要穿裤子 |
| [10:12] | 来自妈妈 让你的朋友们赶紧走 我们要回家了 | |
| [10:15] | My dad’s coming. Everybody out! | 我爸要来了 所有人都出去 |
| [10:16] | Go, go! Get out! | 快点 赶紧走 |
| [10:18] | Out, out, out, out. Go, go, go, go! | 出去 出去 走走走 |
| [10:33] | Oh, my…! | 天哪 |
| [10:54] | – Hi. – Hey, Mom. | -嗨 -妈妈回来了 |
| [10:57] | There’s my girl. | 我家女儿真乖 |
| [10:59] | All alone, like I knew you would be. | 一个人待着 我就知道是这样 |
| [11:02] | Okay. Hey, Katie, we’re very tired, | 好了 凯特 我们很累了 |
| [11:04] | so we’re just gonna go straight up to bed. | 打算直接回卧室睡觉 |
| [11:06] | Okay. | 好 |
| [11:09] | I never got my minibar snacks. | 我没吃到小冰箱里的零食 |
| [11:15] | This room’s taken, bro. | 这房间有人了 哥们 |
| [11:26] | Katie, there were teenagers canoodling in our pantry. | 凯特 储藏间里有两个小年轻搂搂抱抱的 |
| [11:31] | How did this happen? | 这是怎么发生的 |
| [11:33] | It doesn’t matter how it happened. | 事情怎么发生的并不重要 |
| [11:37] | We don’t even need to know what anybody said | 我们也不需要知道 是谁说了什么话 |
| [11:39] | that might’ve led up to it. | 才导致这样的情况 |
| [11:42] | I want to know. | 我想知道 |
| [11:44] | She had a party. | 她开了派对 |
| [11:45] | The one thing I told her not to do. | 我明明说了不许开派对 |
| [11:47] | It wasn’t a party. | 不是派对 |
| [11:49] | Oh, it wasn’t a party? | 不是派对吗 |
| [11:51] | Well, then you won’t mind | 那你应该不介意 |
| [11:52] | if I check the trash outside for evidence, huh? | 我去门外垃圾桶检查一下咯 |
| [11:57] | This house looks a little too clean. | 屋里看起来太干净了 |
| [11:59] | I’ve been living with your mother for a long time… | 我跟你妈一起生活这么久了… |
| [12:00] | Hey! | 你什么意思 |
| [12:10] | Wait! | 等等 |
| [12:13] | Before you do that, I should tell you. | 在你去之前 我要告诉你 |
| [12:16] | A neighbor came by… | 之前有个邻居过来 |
| [12:18] | and he asked if he could | 问我他能不能 |
| [12:20] | dump his beer cans into our trash. | 把他家的啤酒罐扔在咱家垃圾桶里 |
| [12:26] | And… then he said he was moving away | 后来 他说他要搬走了 |
| [12:28] | so we’ll never see him again. | 所以我们再也见不到他了 |
| [12:33] | Oh, Katie. | 凯特啊 |
| [12:37] | Oh-ho-ho, Katie. | 你摊上事了 凯特 |
| [12:42] | Okay, fine. There was a party. | 好吧 这里确实开了派对 |
| [12:44] | But I didn’t drink anything. | 但我什么都没喝 |
| [12:46] | And I only invited two girls over. | 而且我只叫了两个女孩 |
| [12:48] | The others heard about it and showed up. | 其他人都是听到消息之后出现的 |
| [12:50] | Which is exactly what I told you would happen | 我早就跟你说了会这样 |
| [12:53] | and why I said you couldn’t have anybody over. | 所以我才说你不许叫人过来 |
| [12:59] | You’re grounded. | 你被禁足了 |
| [13:01] | Grounded? | 禁足 |
| [13:04] | Mom said I could! | 妈妈说了可以的 |
| [13:09] | What? I– | 什么 我… |
| [13:15] | Oh, Andi. | 安迪啊 |
| [13:24] | What’s up? | 怎么了 |
| [13:26] | That is an excellent question, Teddy. | 你这问题不错 泰迪 |
| [13:28] | What is up? | 你怎么了 |
| [13:31] | Teddy’s scared. | 泰迪害怕 |
| [13:31] | He wants to sleep in here with us. | 所以想跟咱们一起睡 |
| [13:33] | But we have a streak. | 但我们之前那么顺 |
| [13:35] | Well, I guess the streak is over, honey. | 我只能说今非昔比 亲爱的 |
| [13:39] | Teddy, let’s go for a ride. | 泰迪 我们出去兜个风吧 |
| [13:46] | Hey, munchkins. | 孩子们来啦 |
| [13:48] | What a nice surprise. | 真让爷爷惊喜 |
| [13:51] | I see you, Donny. | 我看到你了 大唐 |
| [13:53] | You went behind my back | 你居然背着我 |
| [13:54] | and decided to parent on your own. | 擅自给孩子下了指令 |
| [13:56] | You went rogue. | 你自作主张了 |
| [13:59] | You went rogue, too, | 你也自作主张过 |
| [14:00] | when you let Teddy watch a scary movie. | 之前你让泰迪看了那部恐怖片 |
| [14:02] | Wh… | 我… |
| [14:04] | This is completely different. | 这是两码事 |
| [14:07] | I explicitly said Katie couldn’t have anybody over. | 我明确说过凯特不能邀请人来家里 |
| [14:11] | And I explicitly said that | 我也明确说过 |
| [14:12] | Teddy shouldn’t watch that movie. | 泰迪不应该看那部电影 |
| [14:15] | Yeah, but I wasn’t listening. | 对啊 但我没注意听 |
| [14:19] | Plus, Teddy is the only one in his class | 再说了 泰迪全班的人里 |
| [14:21] | who hadn’t seen it. | 只有他没看过 |
| [14:22] | I was right. | 我做得对 |
| [14:23] | – Well, I think I was right. – But you were wrong. | -我觉得我做得也对 -但是你做错了 |
| [14:26] | I never told Kate to have a party. | 我没让凯特开派对 |
| [14:29] | I just wanted her to make some friends. | 我只是希望她能多交几个朋友 |
| [14:30] | Oh, people were making friends, all right. | 确实有不少人交到了朋友 |
| [14:33] | Some teenager was stealing second base in our pantry! | 两个小年轻都在咱家储藏室里奔二垒了 |
| [14:37] | Where we keep our food. | 那可是放食物的地方 |
| [14:40] | Contaminated, Andi! | 都被污染了 安迪 |
| [14:48] | What’s that? | 那是什么 |
| [14:50] | I signed Emme up for boxing. | 我给艾米报名了拳击课 |
| [14:52] | You said no, but since we’re going rogue, | 你之前说不行 但既然我们都开始自作主张了 |
| [14:54] | I’m doing it anyway. | 我决定付诸行动 |
| [14:58] | Fine with me. | 我没问题 |
| [14:59] | I’ll sign Teddy up for rhythmic gymnastics class. | 我会给泰迪报名艺术体操课 |
| [15:02] | You know that’s the Olympic event | 就是奥林匹克比赛中 |
| [15:03] | where they dance around twirling the ribbons. | 会拿着丝带跳舞的运动 |
| [15:06] | Great. | 很好 |
| [15:07] | Then I’ll call the gym about Emme. Yeah. | 我这就给健身房打电话说艾米的事 |
| [15:10] | I can’t wait to watch her spit a tooth into a bucket. | 等不及看她把牙齿吐进桶里了 |
| [15:13] | Terrific. | 非常好 |
| [15:14] | Good. Yep. | 好的 很好 |
| [15:15] | You have your athlete, I have mine. | 你有你的运动员 我也有 |
| [15:18] | See you at the Olympics. | 到时候咱们奥林匹克见 |
| [15:20] | Hey, we just came to drop off the kids. | 我们把孩子们给你们送来了 |
| [15:24] | Why do you have Teddy and Emme? | 为什么泰迪和艾米在你们那里 |
| [15:25] | Uncle Don ding-dong-ditched us on their porch. | 大唐伯伯把我们扔在爷爷奶奶家门前了 |
| [15:28] | It was awesome. We got Grandpa, like, four beers. | 特别好 我们给爷爷拿了四瓶啤酒 |
| [15:34] | Did we come at a bad time? | 这个时间是不是不合适 |
| [15:35] | I can always tell when a wife’s mad. | 我总能看出一位妻子是否在生气 |
| [15:38] | If you’re fighting, we’ll wait in the driveway. | 你们要是在吵架 我们就在门口等 |
| [15:40] | We-we can hear everything from there. | 反正那里什么都听得见 |
| [15:43] | We’re not fighting, we’re having a disagreement. | 我们没吵架 只是有些意见不合 |
| [15:45] | Oh, doesn’t surprise me. We know all about your drought. | 我完全不惊讶 我们都知道你最近很干旱 |
| [15:50] | Ma, that’s not what this is about. | 妈 不是因为那个 |
| [15:52] | Your daughter-in-law | 你这位儿媳妇 |
| [15:53] | organized a teenage orgy in our pantry. | 在我们储藏间里来了一场青少年狂欢派对 |
| [15:57] | Adam’s just mad because I told Kate | 亚当生气是因为我跟凯特说 |
| [15:59] | it was okay to have friends over, and a party happened. | 可以邀请几个朋友来家里 后来变成了派对 |
| [16:01] | Oh, so what? | 那又如何 |
| [16:03] | You and Don always had parties when we left town. | 你和大唐经常趁我和你爸不在的时候开派对 |
| [16:06] | What? No, we didn’t. | 什么 我们没有 |
| [16:07] | The hell you didn’t! There were more beers | 屁的没有 我们回来时 |
| [16:09] | in the fridge when we got home than when we left. | 冰箱里的啤酒比走的时候还多 |
| [16:13] | That’s because this weird neighbor | 那是因为有一位怪邻居 |
| [16:16] | would sometimes bring beers over | 有时候就会拿啤酒过来 |
| [16:18] | and we would put them in the fridge for you. | 我们就帮你们放进冰箱 |
| [16:20] | And then he moved away, so you can’t ask him. | 后来他就搬走了 所以没办法求证 |
| [16:23] | Was it Sal? Or Daryl? | 是萨尔吗 还是达利尔 |
| [16:26] | That seems like something he would do. | 感觉很像他会做的事 |
| [16:27] | He’s making it up, Bev. | 那是他胡编的 贝芙 |
| [16:29] | The point is, Andi, | 重点是 安迪 |
| [16:31] | we are supposed to parent together, | 我们应该共同去做决定 |
| [16:33] | – and she went rogue. – He went rogue first. | -可她自作主张了 -是他先自作主张的 |
| [16:36] | Well, that’s a different story. Nobody likes that. | 那是另外一件事了 没人喜欢听的 |
| [16:39] | I had to lay down the law with your mother in ’79 | 我在1979年 跟你妈也严肃地谈过 |
| [16:42] | – when she took you… – Don’t you finish that sentence, Joe. | -当时她带你… -不许说完这句话 乔 |
| [16:44] | You took Adam to get a perm | 你带着亚当去理了卷发 |
| [16:46] | after I told you not to. | 我当时明明说过不行 |
| [16:47] | You’re darn right I did. | 我当然去了 |
| [16:49] | Oh, you looked like one of The Jackson 5. | 你当时看着像杰克逊五兄弟合唱团成员 |
| [16:53] | His hair was so big, a bird got stuck in it. | 他的卷发特别大 有只鸟还卡住过 |
| [16:55] | Hold on, hold on, I have an important question. | 等等 我有个重要的问题 |
| [17:00] | You had a perm? | 你留过卷发吗 |
| [17:01] | No. | 没有 |
| [17:03] | Stop talking. This family talks too much. Goodbye. | 别说了 这家人嘴巴太大了 再见 |
| [17:07] | He wanted to express himself, and I supported him. | 他想要表达自己 我支持了他 |
| [17:10] | No father should see his son | 没有哪位父亲应该看到他的儿子 |
| [17:11] | under a beauty shop hair dryer reading Good Housekeeping. | 坐在发廊的吹风机下读家政杂志 |
| [17:22] | Can’t believe a word they say. | 他们说的一个字都不能信 |
| [17:26] | Well, it makes me feel better | 不过我现在感觉好点了 |
| [17:27] | that we’re not the first parents arguing about this stuff. | 因为我们不是第一对为此争吵的父母 |
| [17:31] | It probably goes all the way back to the Old West. | 也许从西部时代就出现过这种问题 |
| [17:37] | Ain’t that right, Sheriff? | 对不对 警长先生 |
| [17:47] | Well, I reckon so. | 也许是的 |
| [17:51] | Madam Prostitute. | 妓女小姐 |
| [17:54] | I’m a pioneer woman. Sheesh. Let it go. | 我是位拓荒女 别执着了 |
| [17:58] | Fine, fine, fine. | 好吧 |
| [18:02] | Maybe for our anniversary. | 等纪念日的时候再玩那个 |
| [18:05] | I… I’m sorry for going behind your back with Teddy. | 对不起 之前泰迪的事我不该擅自行动 |
| [18:09] | Me, too, with Kate. | 凯特的事我也知道错了 |
| [18:11] | – Going rogue is a bad idea. – You’re right. | -自作主张真的不行 -你说得对 |
| [18:15] | So we’re not gonna do that anymore, right? | 所以我们以后不能再那样了 好吗 |
| [18:16] | Right. | 好 |
| [18:24] | Well, there’s hundreds of scary movies, | 主要是有几百部恐怖片 |
| [18:26] | and I’m too afraid to watch them alone. | 我不敢一个人看 |
| [18:30] | We’ll go case by case. | 到时候分情况讨论吧 |
| [18:33] | Fair enough. | 好 |
| [18:36] | Hey, you got any pictures of you with that perm? | 你卷发时期的照片还有吗 |
| [18:38] | No. No. | 没了 |
| [18:40] | No, I burned them all. | 没了 我都烧了 |
| [18:43] | That’s too bad. You might get lucky if you did. | 真可惜 要是有的话 说不定会有奖励呢 |
| [18:47] | I know exactly where one is. | 我知道有一张放在哪里 |
| [18:54] | Morning, fellas. | 早上好啊 朋友们 |
| [18:59] | What a day, huh? | 今天真美好 |
| [19:04] | Have you ever seen a sky that blue? | 你们见过这么蓝的天吗 |
| [19:10] | Well, somebody sure has cheered up. | 某人终于打起精神了 |
| [19:14] | Yeah, worked everything out. | 是啊 都解决了 |
| [19:15] | Instead of grounding Katie, | 我没有禁足凯特 |
| [19:17] | her punishment is Teddy has to sleep in her room. | 她得到的惩罚是泰迪要去她屋里睡 |
| [19:22] | So in the parents’ room, well, | 而在主卧里呢 |
| [19:26] | let’s just say | 只能说 |
| [19:28] | there’s a new sheriff in town. | 镇上来了一位新警长 |
| [19:33] | Yeah, well, my streak is over. | 好吧 我之前的好运没了 |
| [19:35] | Marcy said choosing sex over family is a turnoff. | 玛茜说我为了做爱抛弃家人让她很没兴致 |
| [19:39] | And then she started listing all the other things I do | 后来她又开始说我做的其他事 |
| [19:42] | that are turnoffs. | 也让她很没兴致 |
| [19:44] | It was a real bad night. | 那天晚上太惨了 |
| [19:48] | Well, you have my sympathies. | 我向你表示同情 |
| [19:50] | As a single man, I understand how hard celibacy can be. | 作为单身男人 我知道禁欲有多难受 |
| [19:54] | Here. Let me help you with that. | 来 我帮你 |
| [20:01] | Okay, okay, okay, okay. | 好了 好了 |
| [20:03] | Take it easy, buddy. | 冷静 兄弟 |
| [20:06] | Some guys just can’t handle a drought. | 有些人真是稍微一干旱就受不了 |