| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | All right, it’s report card day. | 好的 发成绩单的日子 |
| [00:04] | The least fun day when I was your age, | 我小时候的噩梦 |
| [00:06] | but the most fun day now. | 现在的娱乐时间 |
| [00:08] | Hand them over. | 交上来 |
| [00:11] | I think you’ll be pleased. | 包您满意 |
| [00:13] | Ooh, a, b, b, a. Abba. | A B B A Abba乐队 |
| [00:17] | My favorite band and my favorite grades. | 我最爱的乐队 也是我最爱的成绩 |
| [00:20] | Wow. Nice report card, Katie. | 成绩不错嘛 凯蒂 |
| [00:23] | Is it good enough to go to Harvard? No. | 但够考上哈佛吗 不够 |
| [00:25] | Can we afford Harvard? No. Right in the sweet spot. | 我们供得起哈佛的学费吗 不能 刚刚好 |
| [00:31] | I remember what you said, Dad, any college that ends in State. | 我牢记你的嘱咐 爸爸 任何州立大学 |
| [00:38] | Wow, all smiley faces. | 全都是笑脸 |
| [00:41] | What can I say? People love me. | 还能说什么 大家爱我 |
| [00:45] | Okay, girls, great work. | 姑娘们 成绩不错 |
| [00:47] | Keep those grades up. | 继续保持 |
| [00:48] | Excellent job, ladies. Let’s get out of here. | 干得好 姑娘们 我们赶紧走吧 |
| [00:53] | Teddy. | 泰迪 |
| [00:56] | Yes, Father? | 在 父亲 |
| [00:58] | Where’s your report card? | 你的成绩单呢 |
| [01:00] | Oh, my school’s not doing grades anymore. | 我们学校现在不打分了 |
| [01:03] | It’s just based on how we feel, | 主要看我们的感觉如何 |
| [01:05] | and I feel great. | 我感觉不错 |
| [01:08] | I saw you shove it in your pocket. Hand it over. | 我看到你把它塞进裤子了 交出来 |
| [01:12] | Come on, tight pants. | 快点 紧身裤 |
| [01:18] | Good God, a “Z”? | 老天爷啊 Z |
| [01:20] | I tried to change a “D” to a “B” on the bus. | 我想在校车上把D改成B |
| [01:23] | It was bumpy. | 可太颠了 |
| [01:25] | Your teachers say you’re not doing your homework. | 老师还说你不写作业 |
| [01:28] | Look, your grades don’t have to be perfect. | 我们不要求你的成绩有多好 |
| [01:29] | We just expect you to try your best, | 只希望你尽力就行 |
| [01:32] | but this looks like you’re not trying at all. | 可现在看来 你完全没努力过 |
| [01:34] | Explain yourself, mister. | 好好解释一下 小伙子 |
| [01:36] | I’m just looking for a different lifestyle. | 我只是想过一种不同的生活方式 |
| [01:39] | A different lifestyle? | 不同的生活方式 |
| [01:41] | Look, date who you want, but do your homework. | 你想跟姑娘约会没问题 先把作业写了 |
| [01:45] | Homework’s a bummer, man. I want to be free. | 作业最扫兴了 我想要自由 |
| [01:49] | Teddy, go to your room. | 泰迪 回你房间去 |
| [01:50] | That’s right. | 没错 |
| [01:51] | We need some privacy to talk about your punishment, | 我们俩要讨论一下对你进行什么惩罚 |
| [01:53] | and I’ll just say this– everything is on the table. | 这么说吧 我们可选择的手段太多了 |
| [02:01] | That was good. | 讲得不错嘛 |
| [02:02] | “Everything’s on the table.” Scary. | 我们可选择的手段太多了 吓人 |
| [02:05] | It’s from a Liam Neeson movie. | 跟尼姆连森的电影学的 |
| [02:07] | Did he think we were gonna buy that lifestyle stuff? Ugh. | 他居然以为我们会吃生活方式那套 |
| [02:11] | I mean, if you blow off your homework, | 你想不交作业 |
| [02:12] | you say you lost it or the dog ate it. | 说作业丢了 或者被狗吃了也行 |
| [02:14] | They’re classics for a reason. Yeah. | 这才叫经典的借口 |
| [02:16] | Well, we learned with Katie, at some point, | 从养凯蒂的经验中知道了 从某个阶段开始 |
| [02:18] | kids stop doing their homework, | 孩子就不爱写作业了 |
| [02:20] | so we’re gonna threaten to send Teddy | 我们就威胁泰迪把他送到 |
| [02:22] | where we threatened to send her. | 威胁过凯蒂的地方 |
| [02:24] | Military school. | 军事学校 |
| [02:26] | It’s a bluff, but he doesn’t know that. | 吓唬他的 可他不知道 |
| [02:28] | Remember, as soon as Kate heard the words “military school,” | 还记得凯蒂一听到军事学校这几个字 |
| [02:31] | her eyes got big and her lip trembled. | 眼睛瞪得像铜铃 嘴唇抖得像筛子 |
| [02:33] | That’s when we knew we had her. | 一下就知道搞定她了 |
| [02:35] | We should write parenting books. Yeah. | 我们俩应该写本育儿书 |
| [02:38] | You know, someday they’re gonna be too old to scare. | 等他们长大了 就吓唬不住了 |
| [02:42] | Let’s enjoy it while we can. | 所以我们机不可失时不再来 |
| [02:45] | Your father and I have discussed | 我和你父亲商量了一下 |
| [02:47] | the consequences of your report card. | 要怎么处理你这次的成绩单 |
| [02:48] | And we’ve decided what needs to be done. | 我们已经做好了决定 |
| [02:51] | This is very hard for a mother, | 这对一个母亲来说太难了 |
| [02:53] | so forgive me if I get emotional, it’s just | 所以我情绪有些激动 不要奇怪 只是 |
| [02:56] | I’m gonna miss you so much. | 我会非常想念你的 |
| [02:58] | Get ahold of yourself, Andi. | 坚强一点 安迪 |
| [02:59] | – It’s for his own good. – I know. | 这是为了他好 -我知道 |
| [03:01] | Teddy, if you don’t start doing your homework, | 泰迪 如果你再不写作业 |
| [03:03] | we’re gonna send you to military school. | 我们就会把你送去军事学校 |
| [03:05] | – What? – That’s right. | -什么 -没错 |
| [03:09] | Runcrest Military Academy. | 跑顶峰军事学校 |
| [03:11] | They call it Runcrest because they make you run | 之所以叫跑顶峰是因为他们会逼你一直跑 |
| [03:13] | to a crest. | 跑到顶峰 |
| [03:15] | That’s a hill. | 顶峰在山上 |
| [03:19] | Just thinking about my baby running up | 只要想到我的宝贝要在满是蝎子的山上 |
| [03:21] | that scorpion-infested hill, it just, it breaks my heart. | 跑来跑去 简直 让我心都碎了 |
| [03:26] | So what’s it gonna be, Teddy, huh? | 所以你怎么选 泰迪 |
| [03:29] | Homework or military school? | 写作业还是去军事学校 |
| [03:32] | Well, that’s easy. | 太简单了 |
| [03:33] | Military school. | 军事学校 |
| [03:36] | – Come again? – What’s that now? | -再说一遍 -什么东西 |
| [03:38] | I could use the structure. When do I ship out? | 有组织训练一下我挺好的 什么时候出发 |
| [03:44] | Teddy, go to your room. | 泰迪 回你房间去 |
| [03:47] | This is my room. | 这就是我的房间 |
| [03:49] | Then go to a different part of your room. | 那就到你房间里的另一个地方 |
| [03:51] | You heard your father. | 听你爸的话 |
| [03:53] | There, in-in the dusty corner where the vacuum can’t reach. | 去 去那个吸尘器吸不到的角落吃灰 |
| [04:09] | “Go to a different part of your room”? | 到你房间里的另一个地方 |
| [04:12] | I actually said that. | 真是我说的话 |
| [04:14] | It’s like a dragon opened its mouth and jelly beans shot out. | 就像恶龙一开口 喷出一堆彩虹糖 |
| [04:19] | Don’t blame yourself. We were in shock. | 别自责了 我们是吓到了 |
| [04:21] | What kind of kid wants to go to military school? | 哪种孩子愿意去军事学校啊 |
| [04:25] | That trick used to work so well on Katie. | 这招在凯蒂身上用着多有效果啊 |
| [04:27] | Yeah, but Teddy didn’t give us the big-eye lip tremble. | 是啊 可泰迪就没有铜铃眼睛可颤抖嘴 |
| [04:30] | I want our child sad and scared, so we know we’re good parents. | 我希望我的孩子们悲伤又恐惧 我才觉得自己是个好家长 |
| [04:35] | Sad and Scared– that’s a good title for our book. | 《悲伤又恐惧》我们的书名有了 |
| [04:39] | Well, he called our bluff. | 他猜我们是在吓唬他 |
| [04:41] | Yeah, if the kids know we’re bluffing, | 要是孩子们知道我们只是吓唬他们 |
| [04:43] | the wheels come off this whole family, Andi, | 家庭这列列车的轮子就要掉了 安迪 |
| [04:45] | so there’s only one thing left to do. | 所以我们只剩一个办法了 |
| [04:47] | We’re gonna actually send him to military school. | 真的要把他送进军事学校 |
| [04:49] | Okay, Runcrest Military Academy. | 好的 跑顶峰军事学校 |
| [04:52] | Whoa-whoa, what-what? What about Scorpion Hill? | 什么 什么 蝎子山怎么办 |
| [04:55] | You made that up. | 那是你自己编的 |
| [04:57] | Oh, it’s so real to me now. | 说得我自己都信了 |
| [05:00] | Okay, look. | 好的 看 |
| [05:01] | Tuition, $300, we can swing that. | 学费300美元 还是掏得起的 |
| [05:04] | That’s the application fee. This is the tuition. | 那是申请费 这才是学费 |
| [05:10] | He’s gonna flunk out of school and live with us forever. | 他要辍学在家 永远跟我们住在一起了 |
| [05:14] | I don’t want to be that lady walking around Target | 我才不要成为去超市逛街 |
| [05:16] | with her giant son begging her for hot dog money. | 旁边跟着老儿子跟我要钱买热狗吃 |
| [05:20] | I can’t do it, Adam. | 我不行 亚当 |
| [05:22] | Oh, sorry, Andi, didn’t you hear? | 抱歉 安迪 你没听到吗 |
| [05:23] | He wants a different lifestyle. | 他想要不同的生活方式 |
| [05:25] | Well, he’s got to learn that | 他得明白 |
| [05:28] | Work hard, then die. | 努力工作 直到死亡 |
| [05:30] | It’s the American dream. | 这才是美国梦 |
| [05:32] | We can fix this, okay? We’re still in charge here. | 我们可以挽回的 毕竟家里还是我们说得算 |
| [05:36] | Okay, yeah, you’re right. | 对 你说得对 |
| [05:37] | We’ll, uh, we’ll just give Teddy a preview | 我们就让泰迪提前感受下 |
| [05:40] | of what happens to kids who don’t do their homework, yeah. | 不交作业的孩子 未来会过怎样的生活 |
| [05:43] | And we’ll make it look real bad. Yes. | 这个生活可是会很惨的 |
| [05:47] | I mean, he can’t be that hard to outsmart. | 他肯定没那么精明 看不出来 |
| [05:48] | I mean, we saw his report card. | 他成绩什么样 我们知道 |
| [05:50] | Yeah, yeah, and the best part is, | 对 最棒的是 |
| [05:52] | there’s two of us and there’s only one of him. | 我们是两个人 对付他一个 |
| [05:54] | You can never tell Mom and Dad I’m helping you. | 你绝对不能告诉爸爸妈妈是我在帮你 |
| [05:58] | I won’t. You’re getting me out of homework, I owe you. | 我不会的 你让我摆脱了作业 我欠你的 |
| [06:00] | I got to know, what happened when you said | 告诉我 你说你想去军事学校的时候 |
| [06:02] | you wanted to go to military school? | 他们是什么反应 |
| [06:05] | Dad’s eyes got big and Mom’s lip trembled. | 爸爸的眼睛瞪得像铜铃 妈妈的嘴唇抖得像筛子 |
| [06:09] | This is so great. | 太棒了 |
| [06:10] | I fell for all their tricks and now I get payback. | 他们的花招全招呼在我身上了 现在换我了 |
| [06:14] | So what’s next? | 接下来怎么办 |
| [06:15] | Nothing. We just blew up their biggest move. | 没事了 我们已经拆掉了他们最大的招数 |
| [06:18] | They might try one or two other things, but it won’t last. | 也许还会再试一两个新招 不过挺不了多久 |
| [06:21] | Every day they get a little older and a little tireder. | 他们一天天地在变老 体力越来越差 |
| [06:26] | All right, smart guy, military school’s off. | 好的 聪明孩子 军事学校不去了 |
| [06:29] | They weren’t as strict as I wanted them to be. | 他们现在根本不严格 |
| [06:31] | They started letting people smile. | 居然允许学生微笑了 |
| [06:33] | But I can straighten you out right here. | 在家我可以比他们更加严格 |
| [06:35] | You won’t do homework, you’ll do work-work. | 既然不愿意写作业 就来工作吧 |
| [06:37] | Meet me in the driveway and get ready to sweat. Hi, honey. | 去车道等我 准备出出汗 亲爱的 |
| [06:43] | Work? These are video game hands, not real-life hands. | 工作 这是打游戏的手 不是过真实生活的手 |
| [06:46] | Relax. I know how to deal with this. | 放心 我知道的怎么处理 |
| [06:49] | How’d he look? | 他什么表情 |
| [06:50] | Remember when he was going down the hill on his bicycle | 记得他以前骑自行车下山的时候 |
| [06:52] | and the handlebars came off? | 然后车把掉了 |
| [06:53] | He looked like that. | 表情一模一样 |
| [06:56] | Okay, your job is to take this messy pile of bricks over here | 好的 你的工作就是把这些乱七八糟的砖块 |
| [06:59] | and turn it into a neat stack of bricks on the pallet over there. | 搬到那边 在木架上码放整齐 |
| [07:02] | – That sounds hard. – Because it is. | -听起来好难 -本来就难 |
| [07:05] | If you can’t be bothered to do homework, | 如果你不愿意做作业 |
| [07:07] | the only thing people are gonna trust you with is grunt work. | 以后到社会上 人们会只让你做体力活 |
| [07:10] | And the kids who did homework | 但做作业的孩子 |
| [07:11] | will get nice, cushy office jobs with free muffins. | 工作就轻松了 舒服地在办公室里吃着免费的马芬蛋糕 |
| [07:14] | Free muffins, Teddy. Think about what you’re giving up. | 免费的马芬蛋糕 泰迪 想想你放弃了什么 |
| [07:19] | So I’m gonna be a bricklayer? | 所以我会成为一个砌砖工人 |
| [07:20] | No, no, my friend, you’re a brick mover. | 不不不 傻孩子 是搬砖工人 |
| [07:23] | You’re one step above the brick. | 你只比砖高级一点点 |
| [07:25] | If the brick had legs, it wouldn’t need you. | 要是砖自己有腿 也不需要你了 |
| [07:27] | Get cracking. | 开始搬吧 |
| [07:33] | Look at him out there in the sun, | 看看他在太阳下 |
| [07:34] | full of sweat and regret. | 满身大汗 充满悔意 |
| [07:38] | He just dropped a brick on his foot. | 刚刚把自己的脚砸了 |
| [07:40] | This is going great. Yeah. | 这下太好了 |
| [07:42] | He’s really… not doing that right. | 他真是 做得乱七八糟 |
| [07:46] | Th-Th-There’s gaps, Andi, gaps in the stack. | 看那些缝隙 安迪 砖块中间有空隙 |
| [07:49] | Well, he’s just getting started. | 他才刚刚开始 |
| [07:50] | Yeah, but the beginning is where you have to be perfect | 对 但开始才是最重要的 |
| [07:52] | or everything else is out of whack. | 否则到上面会全部塌掉 |
| [07:54] | Look at his edges– they’re all cattywampus. | 看他垒的边 惨不忍睹 |
| [07:59] | That’s-that’s-that’s-that’s not how you do it. | 泰迪 这不是这么垒的 |
| [08:02] | If you got gaps, your corners aren’t square. | 要是有空隙 四个角就不是方的了 |
| [08:04] | Have you never paid attention to me when I talk about bricks? | 我谈砖的时候 你的注意力在哪呢 |
| [08:07] | We’ll just have to start this whole thing over. | 我们得从头再摆 |
| [08:14] | Hmm? That looks good, Dad. | 看起来不错啊 爸爸 |
| [08:15] | Oh, you think it looks good now, you just wait till I’m done. | 你觉得这就不错了 等我摆好再夸吧 |
| [08:25] | You were right. | 你说得对 |
| [08:26] | I messed the first few up and he just took over. | 开头就犯错 接下来他会全都替我干了 |
| [08:29] | Yup, I’m good. | 我就是这么棒 |
| [08:30] | If they gave grades for this, I would get into Harvard. | 要是给这方面打分 我绝对能进哈佛 |
| [08:39] | Look at that perfect stack of bricks. | 看看这完美的砖阵 |
| [08:42] | Now we accomplished something today. | 今天我们完成了它 |
| [08:45] | Did we? ‘Cause Teddy’s not even here anymore. | 是吗 可泰迪根本不在这 |
| [08:47] | Good, he was slowing me down. | 很好 因为他会拖慢我的速度 |
| [08:50] | Adam, we were supposed to be teaching him a lesson, | 亚当 我们应该教他道理 |
| [08:52] | but instead you did all the work. | 结果你把工作都做完了 |
| [08:54] | It’s like he taught us a lesson. | 这是给我们自己上了一课 |
| [08:55] | But you saw it, he had gaps. | 你看到了啊 他摆得有空隙 |
| [08:57] | When Teddy sees this, he will know. | 泰迪看到这个 他就懂了 |
| [09:00] | The only thing he’ll know is how to get out of stacking bricks. | 他唯一能懂的 就是如何逃掉搬砖的工作 |
| [09:03] | Wait a minute, do you think he messed up on purpose, | 等等 你觉得他知道我会出手 |
| [09:06] | knowing I would take over? | 所以是故意搞砸的吗 |
| [09:08] | Ah, that would require Teddy taking one thought, | 那需要泰迪把一个想法 |
| [09:11] | putting it together with another thought, | 和另一个想法放到一起 |
| [09:12] | and making a new thought. | 然后想出新的办法 |
| [09:14] | Can he do that? | 他做得到吗 |
| [09:17] | I would have said no, but I’m the chump out here | 我是想说不能 可我确实冲出来 |
| [09:19] | covered in brick dust. | 现在满身是砖渣滓 |
| [09:23] | Getting kids to do homework is a never-ending struggle. | 让孩子做作业是个没完没了的折磨 |
| [09:26] | My girls are in their fifth year of Chinese, | 我的女儿们在学五年级的中文 |
| [09:28] | but they still speak like fourth-years, | 可口语还是像个四年级的 |
| [09:30] | so I punish them by taking away their cellos. | 于是我没收了她们的大提琴 惩罚她们 |
| [09:34] | Our kids are gonna be working for his kids. | 我们的孩子以后是给他的孩子打工的 |
| [09:36] | Joke’s on them. | 惨的是她们 |
| [09:37] | Our kids’ll be terrible employees. | 我们家娃 不可能是好员工 |
| [09:40] | If Teddy doesn’t get his act together, | 泰迪要是不赶紧好好表现 |
| [09:42] | he’s gonna wind up in summer school like I did. | 就得跟我一样暑假补课了 |
| [09:44] | Hey, that’s right. | 我想起来了 |
| [09:47] | Don, maybe you could talk some sense into Teddy, huh? | 老唐 要不你去劝劝泰迪吧 |
| [09:49] | You learned your lesson. | 你吃过亏 |
| [09:51] | That summer, all my friends went to camp, | 那个夏天 我所有朋友都去夏令营了 |
| [09:53] | and I had to sit in the library with Mrs. Branch, | 我却得一直跟枝老师待在图书馆 |
| [09:56] | a lady so boring she was named after a tree. | 一位无聊到被以树来命名的女士 |
| [10:01] | You know, that could work on Teddy. | 这一招也许对泰迪管用 |
| [10:02] | He’d hate the idea of summer school. | 他肯定不喜欢暑期补课 |
| [10:04] | Yeah. Take him to lunch, Don. | 对 你带他去吃个午饭 老唐 |
| [10:06] | Tell him what happened when you didn’t do your homework. | 跟他讲讲你没好好做作业的时候发生了什么 |
| [10:08] | He’ll listen to you. He thinks you’re cool for some reason. | 他会听的 不知道为什么他觉得你很酷 |
| [10:10] | I am cool. | 我确实很酷 |
| [10:11] | I hate to break it to you, but you got old and I didn’t. | 我也不想说出来 但是你老了而我没有 |
| [10:15] | Then take my girls to lunch. | 那你带我家女儿们去吃顿饭吧 |
| [10:17] | Maybe you can find out why they’ve fallen behind | 也许你能搞清楚为什么她们 |
| [10:19] | in their Russian literature book club. | 在俄罗斯文学读书俱乐部表现不好 |
| [10:22] | You know what, Lowell? Just go home for the day. | 洛厄尔 要不这样吧 你今天回家休息一天 |
| [10:27] | A woman so boring she was named after a tree. | 一个无聊到被以树命名的女人 |
| [10:32] | Mrs. Branch. | 枝老师 |
| [10:35] | Nothing? | 没反应 |
| [10:37] | Anyway, that’s what can happen to you. | 好吧 你也可能会这样 |
| [10:39] | See, the thing is, Uncle Don, | 是这样的 老唐伯伯 |
| [10:41] | Teddy wants a different lifestyle. | 泰迪想要不同的生活 |
| [10:43] | Yeah. I’m not climbing the corporate ladder | 没错 我可不想因为那个男人的要求 |
| [10:45] | just ’cause The Man wants me to. | 在职场步步高升 |
| [10:47] | The Man. I hate that guy. | 那个男人 我好讨厌他 |
| [10:51] | But you work for The Man. | 但是你在为他工作 |
| [10:52] | You’re his stooge. | 你是他的爪牙 |
| [10:55] | You take that back. | 你收回这句话 |
| [10:57] | If you know a way off this hamster wheel, | 如果你知道如何摆脱这个困境 |
| [10:59] | I’m listening. | 我愿意听听 |
| [11:04] | So, did you get through to Teddy? | 怎么样 你说服泰迪了吗 |
| [11:06] | No, but Teddy got through to me. | 没有 但是泰迪说服了我 |
| [11:07] | He’s really zigging where the rest of us zag. | 他看待问题的角度和我们不同 |
| [11:11] | What? What does that mean? | 什么 这是什么意思 |
| [11:13] | Well, it means that Kate and Teddy’s philosophy | 意思就是凯特和泰迪的哲学 |
| [11:15] | really spoke to me. | 让我产生了共鸣 |
| [11:16] | So, I’m gonna zag on home and take a nap. | 所以我打算回家睡个午觉 |
| [11:20] | Wait. Kate was there? | 等等 凯特也去了 |
| [11:21] | Yeah. When I went to pick up Teddy, she hopped in the car. | 对 我去接泰迪的时候 她也上了车 |
| [11:24] | She said lunch was on her, so I stopped asking questions. | 她说午饭她来请 所以我就没多问了 |
| [11:30] | Teddy and Katie never hang out together. | 泰迪和凯特从来不一起玩 |
| [11:32] | Why would she be at that lunch? | 为什么她会一起去吃饭 |
| [11:34] | Good question. | 好问题 |
| [11:36] | And you know something else? Hmm? | 你知道还有一个细节吗 |
| [11:38] | She was in his room yesterday. | 昨天她也在他房间里 |
| [11:40] | She hasn’t been in there since she caught him trying to twerk | 自从上次她不小心撞见他对着镜子练电臀 |
| [11:42] | in front of his mirror. | 她就再没进去过了 |
| [11:44] | Something’s up. | 肯定有情况 |
| [11:48] | You don’t think… | 难道是… |
| [11:52] | She’s helping him. | 她在帮他 |
| [11:54] | Why do I feel so scared right now? | 为什么我忽然有点害怕 |
| [11:56] | Because this is Jurassic Park, | 因为这里是侏罗纪公园 |
| [11:58] | and we just found out they learned how to work in packs. | 而我们刚发现它们还会群体合作 |
| [12:06] | So Teddy and Kate formed a criminal conspiracy. | 泰迪和凯特成了共犯 |
| [12:10] | It is nice they’re spending time together, though. | 不过他们一起玩还挺好的 |
| [12:13] | Snap out it, Andi. | 清醒点 安迪 |
| [12:15] | – I’m gonna put an end to this. – Wait-wait-wait, stop. | -我要阻止他们 -等等 站住 |
| [12:17] | Why? I’m all fired up! | 为什么 我火力十足 |
| [12:20] | Okay. What happens if you go up there and yell at ’em? | 好吧 要是你进去吼他们会怎样 |
| [12:23] | I feel better. And then I watch TV. | 我会感觉好点 然后去看电视 |
| [12:26] | Yeah, but that won’t get Teddy to do his homework | 但是泰迪还是不会写作业 |
| [12:28] | and it won’t stop Kate from helping him. | 而凯特也还会继续帮她 |
| [12:30] | Look, our only advantage is that they don’t know we know, | 我们唯一的优势就是他们不知道我们知情 |
| [12:33] | and we have to use that to take back control. | 我们必须利用这一点 夺回主动权 |
| [12:36] | I want control. | 我想要主动权 |
| [12:38] | Why did I have kids if I can’t tell ’em what to do? | 要是孩子不听话 还要孩子干什么 |
| [12:40] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [12:41] | Everything flows from problem No.1: | 一切的基础都是第一个问题 |
| [12:44] | how do we get Teddy to do his homework? | 如何让泰迪乖乖写作业 |
| [12:48] | Hey, Dad. | 爸你来了 |
| [12:49] | “Hey, Dad”? | “爸你来了” |
| [12:51] | Why’d you leave a stack of bricks in your driveway? | 你的停车道上为什么有一堆砖块 |
| [12:54] | Are you trying to tell the whole neighborhood you’ve given up? | 你是想让所有邻居都知道你放弃了吗 |
| [12:56] | I… I was teaching Teddy a lesson. | 我是想教泰迪一个道理 |
| [12:59] | The only lesson he learned is, his father gives up. | 他学到的唯一道理就是 他爸放弃了 |
| [13:02] | – Did you hear that? – I certainly did. | -你听到了吗 -听到了 |
| [13:05] | My dad can get Teddy into shape. | 我爸肯定能把泰迪骂醒 |
| [13:07] | Just like he did with me when I got bad grades. | 就像我当时成绩不好时他骂我那样 |
| [13:09] | He was a terrible student. | 他当时学习特别差 |
| [13:10] | All he wanted to do was sit in his teacher’s lap. | 他唯一愿望就是坐在老师大腿上 |
| [13:13] | He was 13. | 当时他都13了 |
| [13:18] | Yep. There was no estrogen in the chicken back then. | 对 那时候的鸡肉里没有加雌激素 |
| [13:21] | I was a full man in middle school. | 我中学时就长开了 |
| [13:24] | When Dad heard about that, | 我爸听说之后 |
| [13:26] | he made me water the whole front yard with a tiny Dixie cup. | 让我拿一个小冰淇淋杯给整个草坪浇水 |
| [13:29] | Yeah, it’s the slowest, most painful way to water a lawn, | 没错 那是最缓慢最痛苦的浇水方式 |
| [13:33] | but delightful to watch. | 但是看着很爽 |
| [13:36] | Joe, we-we’ve got homework problems with Teddy. | 乔 泰迪也出了作业问题 |
| [13:39] | Can you take him to your place and fix him up? | 你能不能带他去你家 管管他 |
| [13:41] | 0 Sure. – That’s good, yeah. He’ll be separated from Katie. | -当然 -很好 到时候凯特就不在了 |
| [13:44] | She’s the brains of the operation. | 她是整个行动的司令部 |
| [13:45] | Sounds like a job for Old Tough Nuts. | 看来老硬汉又有活干了 |
| [13:49] | That’s what he used to call himself when I was in trouble. | 以前我惹麻烦的时候他总这么自称 |
| [13:51] | And I was in trouble a lot. | 而我经常惹麻烦 |
| [13:53] | I had a full mustache in fifth grade. | 我五年级就留了胡子 |
| [13:56] | He looked like Sonny Bono. | 看起来像索尼·博诺一样 |
| [14:02] | Since we can’t get you to do your homework, | 由于我们无法劝你写作业 |
| [14:03] | we’re turning you over to your grandfather. | 我们打算把你交给爷爷 |
| [14:06] | We’re sorry it’s come to this. | 我们对此也表示遗憾 |
| [14:08] | That’s okay. I like Grandpa. | 没关系 我很喜欢爷爷 |
| [14:10] | Our relationship has changed. | 我们的关系变了 |
| [14:16] | So, I have to water the lawn with this, or do my homework? | 我只能用这个浇水 不然就得写作业吗 |
| [14:19] | No, homework’s out. This is just your life now. | 没有写作业这个选项 这就是你的生活 |
| [14:23] | Can I talk to Grandma? | 我能跟奶奶聊聊吗 |
| [14:26] | I sent her to Atlantic City with a coffee can full of quarters. | 我给了她一整杯硬币 送她去大西洋赌城了 |
| [14:29] | No one can save you now. | 现在没有人能救你了 |
| [14:35] | All right. | 好了 |
| [14:37] | The lawn is watered. | 草坪浇完水了 |
| [14:40] | Where’s my Dixie cup? | 我的纸杯呢 |
| [14:41] | It fell apart. I was out there for hours. | 烂了 我浇了几个小时 |
| [14:44] | That was my favorite cup! | 那是我最喜欢的杯子 |
| [14:47] | All right, you can pay me back with some elbow grease. | 好吧 你可以出点力来赎罪 |
| [14:50] | You see those shoes? | 看到那些鞋了吗 |
| [14:51] | Make ’em shiny so I can see my beautiful face. | 全部都抛光到让我能看到自己的脸 |
| [14:58] | Dinnertime, grunt. | 吃晚餐了 杂工 |
| [15:02] | A can of shrimp? | 一个虾罐头 |
| [15:05] | If you can open it, you can eat it. | 如果能打开 你就可以吃 |
| [15:10] | Finally done with the dishes. | 终于洗完碗了 |
| [15:12] | Can we watch TV now? | 能看电视了吗 |
| [15:13] | Bedtime. | 该睡觉了 |
| [15:16] | But it’s only 6:30. | 可现在才六点半 |
| [15:18] | You’re gonna need that sleep. | 你需要睡觉 |
| [15:20] | Tomorrow you’re digging holes in the backyard. | 明天你得在后院挖个坑 |
| [15:23] | For what? | 干什么 |
| [15:24] | To have a place to put all your questions. | 放你这些多余的问题 |
| [15:33] | Rise and shine, cadet. | 起床了 小兵 |
| [15:36] | It’s 4:00 in the morning. | 现在是凌晨四点 |
| [15:38] | I let you sleep in because I’m a softy. | 我让你多睡了会 因为我心软 |
| [15:49] | Morning, fellas. | 早上好 |
| [15:51] | Oh. He’s got you counting toothpicks, huh? | 他让你数牙签呢对吗 |
| [15:56] | There’s supposed to be a thousand, | 本来应该是一千根 |
| [15:57] | but Grandpa says they always short him a couple. | 但是爷爷说他们每次都少给一些 |
| [15:59] | Yeah. He made me do that after I asked the school nurse | 对 我当时约校医一起去参加八年级舞会 |
| [16:02] | to the eighth grade formal. | 他也这么惩罚我了 |
| [16:06] | All right. Keep an eye on him. | 好了 你盯紧他 |
| [16:08] | I’m going out back to string some barbed wire | 我出去拿点铁丝网 |
| [16:10] | for the obstacle course. | 来做障碍跑训练 |
| [16:13] | If he makes it through, he earns a can opener. | 如果能跑过关 就有开罐器 |
| [16:20] | You’ve got to get me out of here. I’ll do anything. | 你得带我走 我什么都愿意干 |
| [16:22] | Even your homework? | 作业也愿意吗 |
| [16:23] | I promise. | 我保证 |
| [16:25] | Mmm, I don’t know. | 说不好呢 |
| [16:26] | Maybe you should still try the obstacle course. | 要不你还是试试障碍跑吧 |
| [16:28] | Grandpa went all the way across town to get that barbed wire. | 爷爷去其他城市才买到铁丝网的 |
| [16:31] | No. I’ll do all my homework forever. | 不 我永远都好好写作业 |
| [16:34] | I swear. | 我发誓 |
| [16:36] | Okay. Deal. | 好吧 那说好了 |
| [16:38] | You will thank me for this when you’re sitting | 等你以后坐在舒适的办公室 |
| [16:40] | in your cushy office, eating free muffins. | 吃着免费的马芬蛋糕时 会感谢我的 |
| [16:42] | I know. Can we please leave before he comes back? | 好 能不能趁他没回来先走 |
| [16:44] | Sure. | 好 |
| [16:46] | Now we’re both graduates of Camp Tough Nuts. | 这下我们都从老硬汉夏令营毕业了 |
| [16:48] | – Did he give you a can of shrimp and no way to open it? – Yep. | -他有没有给你一个虾罐头却没法打开 -对 |
| [16:51] | Ugh, he’s been doing that since the ’70s. | 他从七十年代起就这么玩 |
| [16:54] | Might even be the same can of shrimp. | 说不定还是同一个虾罐头 |
| [17:04] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [17:05] | It’s time, Teddy. | 时候到了 泰迪 |
| [17:06] | You need to give up your accomplice. | 你得把共犯供出来 |
| [17:09] | Who was helping you? | 是谁在帮你 |
| [17:10] | You’re the body of the snake, we want the head. | 你只是蛇身 我们要蛇头 |
| [17:14] | We already have a suspect, so you might as well come clean. | 我们已经有嫌疑犯了 你不如直接招了吧 |
| [17:18] | I don’t know what you’re talking about. | 我不知道你们在说什么 |
| [17:21] | Maybe you can’t remember because you’re so hungry | 也许你记不清是因为刚从爷爷家回来 |
| [17:23] | from Grandpa’s house. | 你实在太饿了 |
| [17:26] | I am. | 是的 |
| [17:27] | Then let us jog your memory. | 那我们来激活你的记忆吧 |
| [17:29] | Do it, Andi. | 上 安迪 |
| [17:32] | It was Kate. It was all Kate. I never wanted to lie to you. | 是凯特 全是凯特 我从来不想骗你们 |
| [17:34] | I love you, Mommy and Daddy. | 我爱你们 爸爸妈妈 |
| [17:41] | You’re back. What happened? Are you in trouble? | 你回来了 怎么样 你惹麻烦了吗 |
| [17:44] | I’m not. | 我没有 |
| [17:47] | What do you mean? Hey, Teddy? | 什么意思 泰迪 |
| [17:50] | Teddy! | 泰迪 |
| [17:51] | Teddy, wh-what happened? | 泰迪 发生了什么事 |
| [17:52] | Teddy, open the door! | 泰迪 打开门 |
| [17:54] | He’s not gonna answer, Kate. | 他不会理你的 凯特 |
| [17:57] | Oh, no. | 完了 |
| [17:59] | Oh, look. We finally got our big-eyed lip tremble. | 快看 这下铜铃眼和颤抖唇了 |
| [18:03] | Hmm. Ooh. She added a knee wobble. | 还加了一个膝盖的抖动 |
| [18:05] | Well, that’s new. | 新动作 |
| [18:06] | I like it. | 我喜欢 |
| [18:08] | Sad and scared. Now we know we’re good parents. | 悲伤又恐惧 这下我们肯定是好家长了 |
| [18:14] | I’m really sorry. | 真的对不起 |
| [18:15] | But isn’t the guilt I’m feeling punishment enough? I think so. | 但我现在的内疚难道还不算惩罚吗 我觉得算 |
| [18:20] | Is it enough for you, Adam? | 你觉得算吗 亚当 |
| [18:22] | Your punishment isn’t up to us. | 你的惩罚我们说了不算 |
| [18:24] | What do you mean? | 什么意思 |
| [18:29] | Grandpa? | 爷爷 |
| [18:30] | Our relationship has changed. | 我们的关系变了 |
| [18:34] | Start running. | 开跑吧 |
| [18:35] | I’ve got a Dixie cup at home with your name on it. | 我在家里放了一个写了你名字的纸杯 |
| [18:42] | Hey, if the kids can work in packs, so can we. | 孩子们能抱团行动 我们也可以 |
| [18:44] | That’s right. | 没错 |
| [18:45] | And our pack is scarier ’cause we got the T. Rex. | 而且我们的团体更可怕因为有霸王龙 |
| [18:52] | There you are. So, you’re not coming to work anymore? | 找到你了 你现在是不来上班了吗 |
| [18:55] | It’s been two days. | 已经两天了 |
| [18:56] | Well, some people are worker bees, | 有些人是工蜂 |
| [18:58] | some people are butterflies. | 而有些人是蝴蝶 |
| [18:59] | Me and Teddy are butterflies. | 我和泰迪是蝴蝶 |
| [19:02] | Well, you have to make up those hours. | 你得把工时补起来 |
| [19:03] | And I found just the right person to make sure you do. | 而且我找到了最适合监督你的人 |
| [19:11] | Mrs. Branch? | 枝老师 |
| [19:14] | Mm-hmm. Still working at the library. | 没错 她还在图书馆工作 |
| [19:16] | Here. Have a seat. | 来 请坐 |
| [19:21] | Have a good summer, Don. | 祝你暑期愉快 老唐 |